A conversation with my father on a backwoods road at midnight

Dad: "I saw a cougar on this road once."

Me: "You did, really?"

Dad: "Yep. I was coming back from a fishing trip, and when I rounded this corner up here, I saw a cougar walking along the side of the road. I had my brights on, and it turned and looked at me over its shoulder, so I stopped the car, but it turned and walked down the side of this slope. In the spring, all of that flat land out there is flooded about a foot and a half deep. So I backed up and turned the car so the brights were shining down into the water, and I got out and stood at the edge there, looking...I could see the water moving where it had walked through, and the saplings moving farther out. But then I realized, I'm standing on the side of a road in a patch of bright light with a large wild cougar somewhere around, I can't see it, and this thing could take me."

Me: "...Jesus Christ, it's a mountain lion, get in the car?"

Dad: "...Yeah. Pretty much."


P.S: Evan wants it known that the other day he uttered the phrase "I'm so happy right now, I want to punch you in the face."