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Sorry for the lack of posting. It's been over a month, I know! Let me explain.

The day after my birthday, I was approached by my superior, Herr Oberfeldwebel Dieter Hess. Turns out they had been planning a special party for a few months, and since I'm sehr kühl (and my girlfriend is American), they wanted me to help them out. Being the nice German man I am, I said, "Ja!"

So we put together a nice little party, which was a hit only because of me. I didn't know who the party was for, or what it was for, until I saw him.

The Führer!!

And I shook his hand! And he smiled! And he said I did a good job of picking out the appetizers! As Kelly would say, it was "like a religious experience."

The day after the party, I was given a week's leave, and I flew right to Kelly's house. I just got back to my base today.

What a wonderful life!

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angry

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Well, I just found out that I'm not going to get leave on my birthday, which is the 21st. Not only that, but a Sunday!

It makes me horribly angry. I bust my ass, flying missions, dropping bombs--it takes a lot to hoist those bombs into your plane, then deal with air sickness as you kill civilians!

Not only that, but I think that Kelly's going to dump me. Goddamnit!

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irritated

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Am I the only one not looking forward to Christmas? When I left Kelly's house last night, she was blaring Christmas music. When I got to my barracks today, I realized that my subordinates decorated the whole place up in festive decor!

It's only November!

When it's Christmas, it snows. When it snows, it's hard to get my plane to start.

Last winter, some Ivans called me a girly man and bombed the latrines. So I ran to my plane to go up there and kick some, but my #*$&@#&$ plane wouldn't start! DAMNIT.

The Russians are good for nothing except their potatoes. That's it. Their women are hairy, their men are hairless, and their cows eat at the tables with them.

Uncivilized bastards.

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While I'm drying off from my shower, I'll write an entry about today.

Well, it was "trick-or-treating", which is apparently some American tradition of kids going around to houses and mooching candy off of the elderly. Sounds great! Too bad they didn't have anything like that in the Hitler Youth. The only thing we did to the elderly was push them down stairs.

We were halfway done, when it started pouring. As my dear Grossmutter Heidi used to say, it was raining Tommies and Yanks. Then it started flashing lightning, and Kelly just about had a heart attack on the spot. I must admit, it was scary. So we took shelter at one of her old teacher's houses, and he drove us home. I tried to slip him a Reichsmark, but he didn't know what it was. Ah well.

I had a real reason to this entry..oh yes. I'm supposed to promote Kelly's new icon community. _royaltyicons. She says to go join. So, do what the girl says.

Sieg heil!

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So today Kelly had somewhat of a breakdown because she couldn't find a John Kerry mask.

Therefore, I decided that today would be a good day to explore the town!

I went to a place called Wal-Mart. The incompetence astounded me. I tried to buy a pack of gum, and the imbicile at the Express Lane couldn't ring up the items for the person in front of me. He didn't even speak English right. He had a stronger accent than I do, and that says a lot.

I decided to buy gum elsewhere. Unfortunately, that place made me feel horribly dirty, so I immediately went back to Kelly's house and took a shower.

There's this bouncy little song in Kelly's music collection called Sex Dwarf! Oh, it's delightful!

She's making me read a book by some woman named Coulter..have to go. Sieg heil!

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Sorry for the lapse in posting. Kelly's kept me busy the past few days.

I got leave for Halloween, which is Kelly's favorite holiday. She's had me running around town with her, picking up decorations and ingredients and everything for her Halloween party on Friday.

There was some jerk that kept talking to her..trying to get her to go door-to-door this weekend instead of being with me. His name was Fred something. He was the organizor of the Young Conservatives, which Kelly's a part of. Anyways, he was getting too close to her, so I cut in and kindly told him to fuck off. Schweinhund.

I was reading through some of Kelly's book collection (she has many books about the war). You wouldn't believe what people say about der Luftwaffe! Jealous, I know.

I'm writing this on Kelly's computer, and browsing her music. She listens to some weird stuff. "Ferry Corsten", "Master Blaster", and "Britney Spears"? There's a song I really like, though. It's called "Gay Bar"! It's really hilarious! Those Americans have the best humor.

Well, Kelly needs my help putting up some decorations. I'll post again soon. Sieg heil!

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Guten Abend!

Today was somewhat tiring. It was supposed to be a free day, but I ended up getting up early and doing missions. We dropped a few bombs over some forests in Poland to break up some of the resistance. I know that'll upset Kelly--she's sensitive about the Poland issue.

Speaking of Kelly; I found the perfect gift for her today. I was in der Stadt, getting some decent food, and I saw this light pink dress in a shop window. That's her favorite color. I would have bought it for her, but they only had one size available at the time--a really short small--and I had to get back to the base. I might go back and get it for her, though.

I've been writing her letters, but I'm not sure if she's receiving them. Mail's been a Hunden going through, lately. I'm considering flying through America and dropping a big sack of mail by her house, but figured that I might get shot down by one of those Yanks. Actually, I probably wouldn't. I am an ace, after all.

Long day, and I'm exhausted, so I'm going to bed. Sieg heil!

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Guten tag!

Kelly told me to get a journal, or else I wouldn't get any cookies in my lunch tomorrow. So, I made one. Heil!

Good to be here! I have to go, though. There's a war going on!