We're All Mad Here

Officially on sale!

2014-10-01T22:58:15Z

It’s official! The Farther I Fall is available for pre-sale pretty much everywhere!

Amazon ~ Barnes & Noble ~ Books A Million ~ iBooks ~ Kobo

The official release date is January 20, 2015.

This entry was originally posted at http://roane.dreamwidth.org/962555.html, where there are comments.

Official News

2013-11-13T00:03:27Z

I have some! I am super-excited to announce that I am now being represented by Jennifer Udden of the Donald Maass Literary Agency. I'm using the pseudonym Lisa Nicholas, which if you know me, you'll know is close to but not quite my legal name. ;) I have an official Twitter here, and the beginnings of an official website here.

What is my life, even.

This entry was originally posted at http://roane.dreamwidth.org/955948.html, where there are comments.

So,just for the record

2013-11-06T23:49:35Z

I'm still alive. :) Like most fandom people, I live over on tumblr these days. That said, things are happening in my life, very exciting things.

My novel (working title The Farther I Fall) is finished, edited, and sitting in New York with an agent as we speak, and I'm awaiting official news.
My follow up (working title Past the Mission) is ongoing thanks to NaNoWriMo. Man, I think I've gotten better at this novel thing.
I have officially outed myself on Facebook as a writer of both romance and smut, and one who is trying to do so professionally.
Right now I suppose my genre is officially 'romantic suspense' or 'romantic thriller', but I'm inclined to think of it as 'women-centric action movies with lots of explosions, romance, and sex'.
My day job still rocks, and isn't going anywhere any time soon.
Still single, still entirely okay with it. Right now, between writing and my day job, I'm pretty much working two jobs. When would I have time for more?

More to come as soon as I know it. :)

This entry was originally posted at http://roane.dreamwidth.org/955848.html, where there are comments.

Speechless

2012-06-07T13:00:49Z

I have to share. Here's finished artwork based on Pull the Stars from the Sky, my Sherlock fic in progress: Seattle Rain by draloreshimare (NSFW for nudity, no slash).

I'd seen various stages of the WIP, but the final version is beautiful. And coincidentally, was one of my favorite scenes to write.

ETA: fixed link, as apparently you have to be a Deviant Art member to see it. Also, heck, it's behind the cut:

This entry was originally posted at http://roane.dreamwidth.org/938859.html, where there are comments.

Heresy

2012-03-26T20:12:59Z

Supposedly scent is the strongest memory trigger, but I don't know. Music has to be at least a close second. I'm working on a Very Large writing project right now--maybe novel-length, maybe just novella--and it is very very music-centric, and set around 2000-2001. So I've been digging through some of my old favorites, and it is nostalgia central around my house lately.

I was always your basic boring pop music kid in high school. I liked a few more obscure things, but that's it. College too. Then, during 1994 when I was married and agoraphobic and miserable, my first internet crush (a gothy angsty 19 year old from England who wrote poetry about how his life was over because his one true love was married and in Tennessee--it wasn't pretty) sent me a mix tape. (Incidentally, my ex-husband probably still thinks said internet crush was responsible for our marriage ending. He's wrong. Depression ended my marriage. The internet--and crushes therein--made me realize that there was a world outside of the apartment I hadn't really left in 18 months and that I didn't have to be miserable forever.) The mix tape was full of pretty much three things: Tori Amos, Sisters of Mercy, and The Mission UK. It blew my mind.

Literally, one of the first things I did after leaving the ex--LITERALLY, I stopped on the drive from Tennessee to Michigan as I was leaving him--was buy two CDs. One was "Fumbling Towards Ecstasy" by Sarah McLachlan. The other... I think it might've been "Yes I Am" by Melissa Etheridge. Everyone was talking about "Closer" by Nine Inch Nails, so I got my hands on "Downward Spiral" as quick as I could, which led to "Pretty Hate Machine". More Tori. ALL THE TORI.

So I've been spending all this time listening to music from that time period, and a few years after. I spent maybe a few months in 1995 as a wannabe club kid--for values of 'club kid' that equal the two clubs in Ann Arbor/Ypsi at the time. This weekend, I pulled up "Downward Spiral" for the first time in YEARS, and the memory was SO clear.

Me, 23 years old, dancing at a club that doesn't exist anymore to NIN's "Heresy", sweaty and pogoing and screaming along with the lyrics ("God is dead and no one cares, if there is a hell I'll see you there"). I still remember what I was wearing, because I felt impossibly daring: sheerish pale green crepe-y poet shirt I'd bought at a ren fair (GOD I miss that shirt) with a black bra underneath (OMG, visible!), black leggings, giant Celtic cross necklace, the closest things I had to stompy boots (not terribly close, really), and what felt like a LOT of makeup. I was pretty sure that the people I had come with had taken LSD in the bathroom before we left a friend's apartment (and I was relieved/disappointed they hadn't asked me). I myself might have actually been TIPSY.

As rebellions go, pretty damn mild, right? But man, it felt like EVERYTHING. It was everything, because it was the first time in my life I'd ever dared anything like it. (You could probably argue that getting married and dropping out of college at 19 was rebellion, but that was more the act of a desperately unhappy person.)

Drunk and dancing and screaming lyrics that blasphemed against everything I was brought up to believe. It's a powerful memory, one of my first glimpses at the possibility of shaping my life by own rules.

This entry was originally posted at http://roane.dreamwidth.org/924887.html, where there are comments.

It's a very long meme.

2012-03-21T16:22:59Z

Comment to this post, and I will list seven things I want you to talk about. They might make sense or they might be totally random. Then post that list, with your commentary, to your journal. Other people can get lists from you, and the meme merrily perpetuates itself.

I love these memes. So, this came from roseredhoofbeat, one of my Sherlock fan-buddies.

1) Slashfic and feminism
Whoo boy. This is a big topic. I have many varied and conflicting thoughts on this one. The biggest problem I have with slashfic is that--unless it's femme-slash, there aren't a lot of female characters featured. Despite the fact that I tend to create original female characters, they, by definition of the genre, tend to be relatively minor. (Okay, you could argue that Maggie in Defence Mechanisms is anything but minor given the pivotal plot role she plays, but... that's another story. Possibly an actual story, because really: who IS this woman and where can I find one?) So there's that.

It can also be the breeding ground for a lot of misogyny. The sheer levels of hate towards any female character with designs on someone's preferred pair is SCARY. (*coughIreneAdlercough*) And I know for some folks, the tendency to exoticize queer men is troubling. There's a LOT of very very unrealistic gay sex out there in slash-land. And a lot of strange ideas of what actually constitutes "sex". I just got a review on one of my stories today where the person said, "I'm glad they didn't actually have sex." And I thought, "Well what the hell did I just spend five pages writing, then?" But, in what is a pretty hetero-centrist mindset, if there isn't a penis penetrating something, it's not sex. Which makes me wonder what these people think women do together, but again, another topic for another day.

On the other hand, slash is a fantastic way to explore romance tropes without having to deal with the whole "Me Tarzan, you Jane" mentality so common in romance novels. I'm always bothered when a slash author feels the need to feminize one of the male characters (not gender-swap, that's a whole different matter), or equates certain sexual practices with gender roles. And as I've written about before, it's been very liberating for me personally. It's easier for me to write male/male romance than male/female. I think there's still a fear that if I write het romance, it'll be perceived as wish fulfillment from a fat single middle-aged crazy cat lady (whether it is or not). But if there's two men, well then. Any fear of perceived author self-insert is removed from the picture.

Annnnd, then there's the whole issue of the female gaze. I know not everyone who reads/writes slash is female, or even necessarily interested in men. But I'd guess that predominantly, that's the case. Venture somewhere like Tumblr (my favorite flavor of fandom crack right now) and there is SO much discussion about so-and-so's [pick a body part] it's not even funny. Well okay, I actually DO think it's funny. And much weeping and gnashing of teeth over how attractive various actors are. (Yup, I do it too, I'm--mostly--not ashamed. Have you SEEN the men in Sherlock?) There's also a strong component of "Yes, he's brilliant, he has a lovely mind, but can you please post that gif where he takes his scarf off again? I need to stare at it for a while." It's a very female-oriented community that talks a lot about sex, which is kind of novel for me.

2) BBC-verse fandom (Who, Sherlock, Merlin, pick one)
The BBC is a giant plot by the UK government to take over their old empire by inducing an utter lack of productivity in the rest of the world through the quality of their television shows. And also, they found Benedict Cumberbatch when his spaceship crashed at the foot of a BBC broadcast tower, because that man is not human.

3) Working in a shelter
It's honestly the best job I've ever had. I don't think I could ever go back to working in a strictly corporate setting again. Because I work on the fundraising side of things, I definitely see more of the good side of people than the folks who work directly with the animals, but the horror stories are hard to deal with sometimes. That's probably been the toughest realization, that no matter how good this place is (and I'd rate it as one of the best shelters in the country), you're never going to be able to save every animal, and you're never going to be able to educate every person. Once you get past that, it gets easier.

4) Your critters
I am a crazy cat lady. Right now, I live with four cats (Pooka, Rumpus, Neville, and Belle) and one dog (Maddie the golden retriever). Pooka was my first rescue pet, a tortico (her coloring is tortie with big white patches--see icon) adopted ten years ago. She's a little old lady now (at least 12, possibly older). Rumpus I also adopted ten years ago, but he was a tiny kitten. He's a 'fraidy cat who runs from everything. Likewise Neville the brown tabby, who was a foster cat that wound up staying. He runs from me every chance he gets, but will occasionally come and get attention. And Belle, my problem child. Two years ago, I was fostering kittens for the shelter, and it was a terrible year, for everybody. Orphaned kittens are fragile at the best of times, but that year every single kitten I fostered died. Except for Belle, and it was a near thing with her. She has been a pushy brat from the very beginning, and she stole my heart. When she turned out to be the only survivor, I couldn't give her up. (Incidentally, I haven't really fostered since. That was a TOUGH year.)

And Maddie. My 8 year old baby girl, you can read all about how she wound up with me here.

5) Turning 40
Which I am doing in about 3 and a half months. (July 7th!) I'm kind of excited about it. My thirties have been full of a lot of suck, but mostly, the kind of suck that results in personal growth in a major major way. I'm hoping that in my forties I'm able to start taking advantage of all this growing I've been doing. I'm a little sad that turning 40 makes some things less likely (the idea that I'm ever going to settle down and have a family is growing more and more distant), but overall, I'm pretty optimistic.

6) Size acceptance

Oh god. Quite possibly my salvation. Some time in my 20s I discovered the size acceptance or fat acceptance movement through an email list. I have been fat my entire life. I think I started getting chubby around the age of 4. My mother dealt with it in THE WORST possible manner, and as a result I spent most of my childhood on diets and hating myself, and have wound up with a serious eating disorder. The discovery that there were a WHOLE GROUP OF FAT PEOPLE OUT THERE, and that they didn't hate themselves, and that they didn't spend every day wishing they were someone else--that was pretty revolutionary for me.

It's been about 15 years, and if I'd never stumbled on to the crazy notion that I deserved love and respect regardless of my weight, I don't know that I would have come as far down the path of healing as I have. It's still difficult. I am a very large person, through a complex combination of genetics and mental illness and addiction and poor habits. Other people are varying sizes for their own complex set of reasons. Just accepting that, and accepting that it is NEVER as simple as "well you should just walk more" or whatever the latest line of diet bullshit is, has brought a lot of peace for me.

7) Being a fanfic author
I love it. I unabashedly love it. My brain still tries to tell me sometimes that I should be writing "real" stories, and that I CERTAINLY shouldn't be wasting my time/talent/whatever writing SLASH (the brain says snootily), but mostly I'm past it. I get nothing but pure JOY from telling these stories. The fact that I have a growing audience is still blowing me out of the water. It makes me squee and dance around my apartment. The only time I got anything approaching this kind of charge writing original fiction was if I got a rejection letter that didn't suck quite as much as the others (or the couple of times I got an acceptance). Seriously. The one rejection letter that I got that was written by the head editor of a magazine as opposed to his assistant? That was pure gold. :)

But with fanfic, I post stuff, and people like it. I mean, I'm sure there are people that hate it, but they've been quiet so far. Yesterday, someone actually asked me if they could translate one of my stories into Chinese, so non-English speakers could read it. CHINESE. A couple of people have been clamoring for artwork based on that same story. ("Perchance to Dream"--shamelessly short and schmoopy.) I'm approaching 'somebody pinch me' levels of glee. Because it's not quite real.

This entry was originally posted at http://roane.dreamwidth.org/923325.html, where there are comments.

What slash has meant to me (an explanation for nonfans)

2012-03-16T15:18:32Z

Here's something I wouldn't think was possible: I've improved as a writer over the past ten years, despite having hardly written a word. And I think it's nothing but a case of being ten years older. I understand people better now. My worldview isn't as black and white. I'm writing things now that I would never have been able to write ten years ago. I don't just mean sex, although that's certainly a big part of it. I used to hold back with some of my writing, fearing--somewhere deep down--that if I wrote a character as wanting something, or being a certain way, that someone would think that that was what I wanted, or how I was. And I was so determined to be a "good girl", even at 30.

Probably the first revolutionary act of my writing was when I started The Exile's Daughter (2003) with the main character saying, "Fuck". (The whole thing was a terrible first line, but at the time, it was exhilarating.) It's not like I never said the word, but I don't know that I'd ever included it in fiction before. The second revolutionary act was writing "Sic Transit Gloria" (also 2003, which is still one of my favorite stories, and I'm kind of sad it never got published): main character of indeterminate gender (at least until the end), grappling with seeing his/her former teen idol now aged and damaged, but still feeling that pull. That was probably the first time I wrote about any character actually feeling sexual desire. Hadn't done it before then, nope nope nope. All of my characters were waist-up beings only. And I think they suffered for that.

This isn't to say I never wrote about sex at all. I was an avid online roleplayer in the late 90s, and for all that pretty much everybody publicly denigrated the idea, there were a LOT of people roleplaying sex, me included. That was different though. That wasn't meant for public consumption--and in my case particularly, was tied up in a lot of messy feelings for my roleplaying partner(s). That was personal. And deeply embarrassing, a dirty little secret.

And now, nearly 40, I find myself in an online community that is smart, engaging, and celebrates the ever-living hell out of sex. Publicly. And very vocally. It took some getting used to. And it was embarrassing at first. The first time I tried to read slash, I kept mentally skimming past the characters' names because it seemed so WRONG. Fortunately (unfortunately?) the two writers I started with are stellar, and I somehow accidentally started with nuclear weaponry-level slash, instead of something milder.

(Yes, fellow Sherlock fans, while greywash may have written the first S/J sex scenes I ever read, the first actual slash-slash I read was... Two Two One Bravo Baker. Is it any wonder I've imprinted on abundantlyqueer like a demented baby duck?)

So it is about sex, but it isn't. The characters I used to write were sterile in the truest sense of the word. They were missing huge giant swaths of human experience. They weren't messy, they weren't terribly damaged, necessarily, they didn't want things that weren't completely okay to want. Because I wanted so desperately to be "normal" and "good", I tried to make them "normal" and "good". Which made a lot of them pretty boring.

Since I last wrote seriously, I've discovered just how messy and broken I am. I've started putting myself back together. I know who I am now. I know what got me here, what broke me, what's healing me. I am able (most of the time) to accept myself as a sexual being, even a sexual being who's made unconventional (and sometimes poorly thought-out) choices. I am no longer so utterly locked-down as a human being that I can't even contemplate fictional characters who aren't also locked-down.

And now I'm playing in this sandbox where the two main characters are so utterly, gloriously human and broken and tough, and I'm finally in a place where I can appreciate that, and play with it. And far from finding it threatening or scary, it's liberating as HELL. And for that, I owe fandom one hell of a debt.

This entry was originally posted at http://roane.dreamwidth.org/921897.html, where there are comments.

Aca-fan questions

2012-03-06T15:07:28Z

Can someone recommend me academic studies of fandom and fan fiction? I've read a little bit of Henry Jenkins (where did my copy of Textual Poachers go??), but I want more. I'm particularly interested right now in the intersection of fan fiction/slash and feminism. Because I'm having thinky-type thoughts and some of them make me squirm in a bad way, but some of them are making my brain go "Dude", and I want to read other people's thoughts.

You can take the girl out of the lit-crit classes, but you can't take the lit-crit classes out of the girl...

This entry was originally posted at http://roane.dreamwidth.org/915202.html, where there are comments.

Monday night

2012-02-14T01:05:26Z

There are so many things I want to do tonight, and none of them have anything to do with my homework.

Damn.

Okay, I'll elucidate.

I've got all seven Sherlock episodes (two seasons and the unaired pilot) sitting in Premiere Elements waiting for me to see if I remember how to use this program.

I also have six stories demanding attention from me, and one of them is actually even not Sherlock/Doctor Who fic. Or fic at all.

Also, Tumblr is being particularly entertaining.

And--I realize I'm late to this train--I just realized how amazing Adele is.

So yeah. Coding a webpage is waaaay down on my lists of interests right now. But alas, it's due on Wednesday. So.

This entry was originally posted at http://roane.dreamwidth.org/902424.html, where there are comments.

"I was not expecting this!"

2011-11-04T15:52:01Z

I have, much to my surprise, fallen madly in love.

After Boogie died, I'd planned to remain dog-free for a while, to give the cats time to settle (especially Rumpus, who hated Boogie fiercely). I thought that MAYBE, come spring-time, I'd think about it again, at the earliest.

Well, this week, one of my co-workers started bringing one of our dogs into the admin office. She's an approximately 8 year old golden retriever, found abandoned in a nearby town, tied to a lamppost. She's clearly had several litters of puppies, and when she was found, she had a severe infection in her girly bits and a ominous mass on her back.

Now she's healthy again: the mass biopsied as just an infected hair follicle, the infection is gone because, well, those bits are gone. :)

In the office, she was timid but very friendly, wanting to check everybody out, but not sure if she should. She stole my heart almost immediately by coming over and laying her head in my lap so she could gaze up at me.

She is absolutely beautiful, and one of the calmest, sweetest dogs I've ever seen. I took her home last night to see how the cats would react, and they either ignored her, or grudgingly checked her over. She, of course, pretty much ignored them.

Someone trained this dog. She has nearly impeccable leash manners, and knows commands like "sit" and "lie down".

So, she's going home with me today, for good.

This entry was originally posted at http://roane.dreamwidth.org/888148.html, where there are comments.

Finding value as a generalist geek

2011-08-11T15:10:10Z

I attended a small conference yesterday hosted by one of our software vendors, and I wanted to write up some thoughts about it really quick. It's probably the first real "networking" I've ever done. The conference-y stuff was fine, tips about the software, attempts to sell upgrades, that sort of thing. The topic groups were really interesting though. I, of course, sat in on the Internet Strategy and Marketing group, hoping to learn some new ideas.

Here's what I learned: HSHV is way ahead of the local curve when it comes to internet strategy. Like, seriously. The first question we discussed was "Do you have an internet strategy?" There were two of us who said yes in a room of more than a dozen. And the other person (an executive with a very well-known Detroit organization) is just getting started. I wound up getting quizzed for a good 20 minutes about what we're doing and why. I heard horror stories. "It took us 3 weeks to get a Facebook post approved, and by then it was too late."

I walked away from the meeting having passed out several of my cards and feeling a little like a local expert--but more on that in a moment.

I am SO lucky. I work in a culture of macro-management, with a LOT of freedom to try new things. The most successful things I've managed to implement (like our Facebook page, our email newsletter, etc.) came from someone--often me, but not always--going, "Hey, wouldn't it be neat if we...?" And higher-ups saying, "Go for it. Let's see how it does." We've had some glorious successes, and some massive, bombing failures.

It sounds like a lot of local non-profits haven't caught on to the fact that the internet is a goldmine for groups like us, both in terms of staying in touch with people and fundraising. I heard a lot of "Well, our constituents don't use the internet" and "our board of directors doesn't think it's important" and most of all "we don't have the staff to handle it". If I were an entrepreneurial sort (and I'm SO not, experience shows that I suck as a freelancer), I'd see a great big business opportunity there.

From a purely selfish standpoint, it was a huge ego boost. I came away feeling like my particular (and often peculiar) set of skills are very valuable in the non-profit world. That I would be asset elsewhere, as well as here. It was a little weird feeling like I knew more about the topic than pretty much anybody in the room. I mean, to be utterly honest, I'm used to feeling that way in certain classroom settings, but never in a corporate setting. I felt a little bit like some of those folks would like to steal me. :)

Which is really weird, because in a larger corporate setting, I don't think I'd be as valuable. I don't specialize enough. I don't know enough code and programming to be a web developer, I don't know enough about design to be a full-time designer, and I don't know enough about user experience and SEO to do that full-time. But--I can do just enough of all three to be invaluable to a small organization that can't afford a designer AND a developer AND a strategist.

So here's what I propose: non-profits all need their own resident geeks. Someone who's passionate about the non-profit's mission, unabashedly geeky in all things internet, curious, and eager to learn anything that will help the non-profit--to self-teach if necessary. And then they need to let that person loose and get out of their way.

Maybe I'm not entrepreneurial, but by god, I think I could start doing me some preaching on this subject.

This entry was originally posted at http://roane.dreamwidth.org/876908.html, where there are comments.

Saturday!

2011-02-26T17:37:44Z

I am inexplicably cheerful and energetic today.

This, despite nearly feeding myself nearly-rotten eggs for breakfast. The sell-by date was February 11, and for some reason in my head, I decided this was only a few days gone (instead of, you know, TWO WEEKS), so the eggs MUST BE fine. I cooked my sausage, then fried up the eggs with no hint of trouble--they didn't smell while cooking! Then I happened to break a yolk and take a bite, and UGH! Not rotten, but definitely not right. :( At least I still had sausage and toast. And coffee. Maybe I can blame the cheerful energy on two cups of coffee instead of my usual one.

Seriously. I've been a chattering magpie on Facebook and Twitter this morning.

At any rate, I've done some badly-needed housework, a bit of freelance work, and am making plans to spend part of the day with a computer game--as yet undetermined which one. Has to be one I already own or that is free. May wind up being Oblivion*, as I watched the trailer for Elder Scrolls V: Skyrim, and fell in love again. Oblivion is technically a PS3 game for me, but I did suddenly remember that hey, new computer--I can play computer games!

So yeah, back to the web design mines for now. And maybe some lunch. We'll see if I can continue my streak of not poisoning myself.

* - Although, god help me, I'm hearing the siren song of the MMORPG again.

This entry was originally posted at http://roane.dreamwidth.org/858832.html, where there are comments.

Felt this needed reposting

2011-02-23T13:26:41Z

I wrote this in response to an absolutely heartbreaking post by catvalente, also known as the brilliant Catherynne M. Valente. She talks about how she "used to be beautiful" (she still is, believe me), and how much she struggles with body hatred. As you can imagine, this raised a lot for me.

I wasn't going to comment, but ...your post and all of the comments after are breaking my heart.

I've been overweight all of my life, and it's due a large part to dieting from a young age, and a response to serious emotional and mental abuse. I joke that I dieted my way up to 400 lbs, but it's not really a joke. I went on my first diet when I was *seven* years old, and was continually on and off them through high school. My metabolism is well and truly fucked.

That said, I did manage to lose 80 pounds my junior year in high school, and kept it off for a couple of years. In my late 20s and early 30s, I went through a similar feeling to what you describe. I was so beautiful then, I was so confident, I was so happy, etc.

But you know what? I wasn't. It's a lie. When I was a senior in high school--arguably the time when I was most conventionally attractive--I thought I was huge and unlovable. Body hate isn't something that just comes on us suddenly. It comes early and hangs on. I wonder if maybe you're idealizing a time when you still had a lot of the same insecurities and body hatred, but it's veiled over by that golden mist of nostalgia.

What I finally realized, just over the past 10 years (I'm 38), is that I HAVE to work on loving my body as it is, regardless of size. Because if I don't love my body, why the hell would I want to take care of it? If I'm at war with it, and punishing it, how can I expect to ever have any sort of mental peace?

Right now, I weigh just under 400 lbs. Over the past year, I've dropped maybe 40 lbs or so, not really by trying, but because I've started learning how to take care of myself, both emotionally and physically--mostly emotionally. I've started dealing with the eating disorder that started in childhood, when I ate because that was the only comfort I got aside from books. I've started dealing with the fact that I WAS abused as a child, and that I am not a broken, weak, damaged person, but someone who survived against the odds.

And I'm fat. Really really fat. There are reality shows about people as fat as me. Almost every day I get reminders that OMG I'M SO FAT I'M GOING TO DIE AT ANY MINUTE. (Incidentally, my health is pretty damn good for someone who's too sedentary.) I could respond to that by dieting--which not only doesn't work, but makes my emotional issues go batshit--or by fighting it off, and loving myself anyway. I am the only person who will advocate for me. I'm reaching a point, finally, when I understand my own value and importance.

I wish nothing but happiness and peace for you. I hope you find a path that gives you as much of both as you can stand. And for the record, add me to the list of people who think you're stunning. You may not remember me, but I saw you at WisCon a few years back, and ended up following you from panel to panel because I was so entranced.

This entry was originally posted at http://roane.dreamwidth.org/857868.html, where there are comments.

Okay, okay

2011-02-09T23:57:46Z

Surely someone out there is ready to confess their undying love or a crush or something. Or maybe you just want to wish me a happy Valentine's Day. :)

Get your own valentinr

This entry was originally posted at http://roane.dreamwidth.org/855960.html, where there are comments.

Reecie

2011-01-27T22:25:11Z

I feel like I should write a tribute to my special girl, Reecie, but I can't right now. The final diagnosis was pancreatic cancer. The good news is, it came on so suddenly, she likely didn't suffer at all until the last day or so. But it's so unfair. She was 7 years old, and a sweeter dog I have never met. She suffered a lot the first couple of years of her life, probably born in a puppy mill, and kept there in a cage and bred. I'm glad she escaped. I guess she escaped this morning, too. I miss her.

This entry was originally posted at http://roane.dreamwidth.org/853096.html, where there are comments.

[CM] "You think she's pretty!"

2010-12-09T03:32:14Z

We're baaaa-ack...

No spoilers, really, not much to say about tonight's ep. I didn't want to like Ashley. I mean, I was ALL SET to HATE HER GUTS because CBS tried to set her up as the younger model and "replacement blonde" after JJ. I'm still withholding judgment, but I didn't hate her on sight. I almost (only almost) bought the writers' reason for bringing in a cadet. We'll see what they do with her.

I confess, my obsession with CM has been slightly derailed of late thanks to my new obsession with Doctor Who--after working through the first four seasons of the new series (and all of Torchwood), I've been picking through the original series. That has not left much brain space for my favorite profilers.

This entry was originally posted at http://roane.dreamwidth.org/845634.html, where there are comments.

Tossing this out there

2010-12-02T02:46:06Z

All right. If nothing else, the past year or so has been a lesson in asking for what I need. So here goes. (Universe, are you listening?) I have been without a car since September. I've gotten by thanks to friends and co-workers, including the loan of a truck for the past month or so. My friends need their truck back in the next few days, and the co-workers I'd been getting rides with have had schedule changes or have moved.

I'm looking for one of the following:

1) Someone who is selling a car for $2000 or less, and is willing to accept short-term (2-3 months max) payments for said car. I can drive a manual as well as an automatic, and all I really need is something reliable that I can fit my rather large self into. Pretty much anything else is optional.

2) Barring that, someone who has a vehicle to lend for the same time period, until I've saved enough cash to buy something.

If you have one of these things, or know someone who does, please let me know ASAP. Email is lisa@selkie.net.

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[CM] "At some point, we're forced to face the truth... ourselves."

2010-11-11T04:06:26Z

Now THAT is the Criminal Minds I know and love. Yeah, I didn't comment on last week's episode, because it was profoundly disappointing.

What an open. They nearly had me believing that Penelope had a darker past than we'd been lead to believe.

This episode was totally a cross between Sunset Boulevard and Psycho. I LOVED it. It reminded me a lot of "True Night", as well, with the stylish pastiche of another media form. It's filmed beautifully, film noir-y bits all over.

That alone would make it a good episode, but it also had the hallmarks of a great CM episode: awesome character interaction, our heroes facing things they don't want to face, creepy-as-hell unsubs... awesome. In retrospect, I totally should have seen the ending coming--we've seen the invisible accomplice before in "Derailed". Plus, you know, Psycho.

Oh, and let's not forget the Cinderella call-out. As soon as she said the shoes didn't fit, I KNEW what was going to happen.

Eeee. This episode made me very happy. Even Reid got his moments--and is it me, or does he seem totally at ease in that 50s glamour-mode? I could see it.

This was a first for me, btw. As soon as the episode ended, I watched it again immediately. Fantastic. Ah yes. Simon Mirren wrote it. That makes sense. :)

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Soup is good food

2010-11-05T22:59:36Z

So, usually I wait until a recipe is finished cooking and I've eaten a whole serving of it before I declare it wonderful and post the recipe, but this soup is SO good, that I decided to post while it finishes simmering.

When I was a kid, my dad used to make 'soup beans' all the time. Soup beans, for the uninitiated, are a big pot of pinto beans cooked with a lot of salt pork and water and that's pretty much it. You eat them with cornbread (SOUTHERN cornbread, please, savory and baked in a cast iron skillet--keep your sweet stuff and your Jiffy mix out of my soup beans) and if you like, raw onion. Classic southern poor people food. Well, I had pinto beans, and I had salt pork, but I wanted something a little more. Plus, I had no buttermilk for cornbread, and soup beans without cornbread is unthinkable. So here's what I came up with.

Lisa's 'Soup Bean' Soup

1 pound of dry pinto beans, sorted and rinsed
Water sufficient for soaking, a quart or so
1-2 tablespoons salt
4 oz salt pork, cut into large chunks
2 bay leaves
2-3 tablespoons olive oil
1/2 cup chopped onion
1 cup sliced carrots
2-3 tablespoons minced garlic
2 tablespoons tomato paste
1 cup cubed ham
Chicken broth (I used two boxes of stock)
1/2 teaspoon ground red pepper
1 tablespoon cumin (I used whole seeds run through my grinder to a coarse grind)

To soak the beans, put beans, water, and salt into a large bowl. Soak for about 8 hours or overnight. Cooks Illustrated recommends brining beans like this, and I've discovered it really makes a taste difference!

Once the beans have soaked, pour everything into a large pot (no, you do NOT need to drain and rinse the beans before cooking in fresh water--you're losing flavor that way). Add water to cover beans by a couple of inches, and add the salt pork and bay leaves. Simmer for about 1-2 hours, until the beans are tender (timing depends on a lot of things, including how old the beans are). Make sure there's plenty of liquid; you may need to add more. At some point late in the simmer, increase the heat to bring everything to a gentle boil--this releases starch from the beans and creates a thicker soup.

When the beans are done, you can put them to the side in a bowl and reuse your pot (I just used a second pot) for the soup itself. Heat olive oil to medium heat, toss in onions and saute until translucent. Add carrots and cook until they start to get tender. (Celery would complete the mirepoix here, but I had none.) Add garlic, then tomato paste and stir in. Add ham, then pour in the beans, liquid and all. (Whether you keep the salt pork or not is between you and your cardiologist--personally, I did.) Add enough chicken broth to reach your desired ratio of broth to 'stuff', or to fill your pot. Add red pepper and cumin. Stir, and simmer until veggies are done.

As soon as I tasted the broth as it started simmering, I knew I needed to post. :) It's meaty, of course, but the spices and the tomato paste give it a really yummy warmth. I can't wait to see how it reheats tomorrow with a slice of fresh-baked bread. :)

This entry was originally posted at http://roane.dreamwidth.org/838125.html, where there are comments.

Hey elflingsmama

2010-11-01T21:41:41Z

Heh. Have you tried this with the boys? :)

[CM] "Spiderman's not a real superhero"

2010-10-28T02:23:11Z

I can't be very objective on this one. Like last week's, it may require a rewatch.

Reid geeking about Halloween and "science magic". Probably the second best part of the episode.

Garcia is pumpkiny. This makes me happy.

Devil's Night in Detroit is a "three-day city-wide cultural phenomenon complete with masks, chaos, and costumes"? A "violent Mardi Gras"? Um, WTF? Okay, I have lived in the Detroit area almost my entire life, and I have NEVER heard of such a thing. City officials keep track of Devil's Night arson for the three days prior to Halloween (as it typically spikes up through the 30th), but that's the only three-day window I've ever heard of. Also guys? Read up on recent history. Devil's Night arson is WAY WAY down since "Angel's Night" was instituted in the mid-90s.

Argh argh argh. That was enough to throw me out of the story for nearly the entire episode. And also, I have heard of a lot of Detroit neighborhoods, but I have never heard of some place called "Rivertown". A quick Google reveals that there is such an area, but it's certainly not a commonly referred-to neighborhood when one thinks of Detroit, not like Greektown or Hamtramack and the like. It's like something you'd pick off a map.

Okay, back to story: creepy episode, sad, but the ending (like last week) felt off. Like the existence of the kid was a deus ex machina to transform the unsub. Like the leap from "he's looking for someone" to "it's an ex-girlfriend" to "oh, btw, she left him and had his kid" just seemed too... I dunno. Fast? Likewise the daddy/daughter sing-along earlier--the pacing just seemed off. Not enough time to build up suspense. Very disappointed in the writing in the past two eps.

That said, oh the very end of the episode. Oh, Jack. He's working the case with his daddy again, and this time he's dressed for the part. I admit, I got a little teary and wanted to hug them both. Tiny!Hotch = cute beyond words.

Still: give me my writers back, damn it. Especially if we're going to stick Reid in the cornfield next week.

ETA: So, apparently Rusty Huggins (the writer) was born in Detroit, according to IMDB. I am baffled. I'm chalking this up to the case of one possibly small mistake making me lose all trust in a writer's credibility. I plan to rewatch, because apparently some folks saw a lot more in this episode than I did.

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Cooooofffffeeeeeee

2010-10-21T14:07:16Z

After having my French press at work for most of the week, I now want to buy an extra one to leave here. And an extra coffee grinder. See, I've been running late all week, so I bought some cream to leave in the fridge at work, and have been grinding my coffee beans every morning at home and bringing them in. Good coffee at work in the morning = HEAVEN. It's almost as good as good coffee at home in the morning. Of course, the downside/upside of grinding the beans at home is that I only bring in enough for one cup, and I want MORE right now.

Maybe I could start a collection for the admin office coffee grinder/beans/French press. I bet I'd have several takers...

Friends don't let friends drink work coffee.

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[CM] "What? I know things."

2010-10-21T02:20:01Z

I need to see this one again, I think. Initially, it seems a little flat, like maybe they tried to fit too much storyline into an episode. This appears to be the first episode for writer Alicia Kirk, so that might be part of the off-ness. But I do want to watch again, if only for Ellie, who remains a fascinating character. I also want to rewatch the Prince of Darkness episodes--because did we ever hear about Ellie's mom before tonight? That seemed rather cop-out-ish.

Still, the unsub was creepy, and Mare Winningham did a great job, I thought. I would've liked to see a little more from her.

Right. Rewatch tomorrow, perhaps more thoughts then--and after I get to read all of the comments over on matociquala's post. :)

ETA: Aha! Figured one thing that bugged me. Major continuity error: Garcia says she's an only child, but in "P911" back in season two she mentioned having brothers.

Unrelated: Kirsten Vangsness was giving hints to folks on Twitter who'd like to dress as Garcia for Halloween. Now I totally want an excuse to wear a costume.

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