Month: June 2023

(June 9, 2023)

now must I confess

word misappropriation

malaprop at best

macerate fled from my tongue

said instead: ‘micturation’*

*(very occasionally I commit such malapropisms: I blame an over-tied tongue, not overtired, just showoffishness coupled with having just had the object in-hand as it were and fixated on my own petard-hoisted cleverness. I mean, really. And I can not blame too-quick a typing-finger. I was telling a new neighbor my devious way with a tincture of datil hot peppers (Tabasco) which when mixed with a neutral solution and put in an eyedropper or squirt-gun or mini-spritzer device, makes a dastardly mean method of spritzing a roll of new-hung toilet paper. But I never would do that: I used a smaller mister instead and never again was ignored when I had my money and my empty beer-bottle “already in-the-rail” as my local and most-oft attentive “tar-bender” ignored my respectfully silent plea in favor of continue the gab-fest with her usual chums not-quite a coven, per se, but the message was passed when the alleged perpetrator snuck into the ladies “head” and sprayed the tincture lightly, ever so lightly, and the coffee-quaffing chums led by her lady-pour-ship visited The Necessary and yon usually well-tipped lass looked across the intervening space from bathroom door to my spot well-across from the horseshoe-shaped bar’s “hen-house” and accused me – moi!? – of nefariousness in the extreme. I put on my innocentest smile and said: “perhaps now I may find a new beer to chew?”)