RP Newsletter on the road - Pt. 3 Look After Each Other
Thoughts on Dennese Victoria's Look After Each Other, Home by the Confluence Collective, and the Final Workshop Projection as I go through both homesickness and stomach flu
Feb. 17 — Sojourner House, Siem Reap
I woke up exhausted. I already slept for 4 hours that afternoon and 9 hours that evening. I don’t know what happened. Was it something I ate? The beef strips didn’t cooperate, or perhaps the pearls from the milk tea were to blame? Maybe I overworked again? I was full throttle since Bangkok, trying to walk, see things, and experience everything. I didn’t give myself a rest day. I looked for things to do, or was writing and looking up things. Perhaps I got literally homesick. I’ve been away for 14 days, at this point. All I’ve been thinking about is photography, writing, the festival, and how badly I want to show all of this to my wife. I glanced at my watch: 6:45 pm. “Well, the slideshows start at 7:30. I still have time.”
This house (Sojourner House, the site of two exhibits and housing for the volunteers) has been awfully quiet. I figured that everyone is at the final workshop projection evening. After all, Angkor Photo Festival and workshops are about THE workshops. Of course, everyone will be there. I took the opportunity to explore the house. The work of the Confluence Collective titled Home is all around it. The work right outside my door, documenting unrest in the Darjeeling region, is another reminder of one of the common things I have experienced in this edition: how conflicts and the never-ending quest for capital derail us. I make my way around the house. Oddly enough, the sentimentality of the works made me miss my family. How fitting that it is titled Home. I am sad to say that I don’t know the deep issues in the south asian region, but I am saddened that I can relate to it by way of seeing the common conflict and issues visualized. I can’t help but wonder how these pictures show the main points I’ve experienced at this festival.
And so as I make my way to the stairs, the familiar sight of the mirror I’ve seen countless times, the week I’ve been there, with the words “Look after each other” took on a whole new meaning to my tired muscles and aching head. I peeped inside the door, trying to soak it all in. I took pictures too, for the gram as the kids say.
I looked at the slideshow. The breeze of the air conditioner is familiar. I clutch my stomach. I curled up in the bed facing the curtain as the pictures flashed. The thought immediately crossed my mind— “Why are we so afraid to forget?”
The act of photography itself is a rebellion against forgetting, but why are we afraid?
There are always new pictures to make, new things to experience, and new people to meet. And yet we try. We document. We remember.
Despite the grand scheme of existence, forgetting is the norm.
“It’s ok to forget. It’s ok to be forgotten.” I told myself.
I looked at my watch. It’s already 8:15 pm. I fell asleep. I probably missed the first half of the graduation slideshow. I turned off the air-con and the projector, posted some Instagram stories, and made my way to the projections.
As I question the meaning of forgetting while in a tuk-tuk, I turned to thinking of what the hell am I doing back in the festival in the first place. I never even went to my high school’s 10-year reunion, but I was hell bent on coming back to Siem Reap. Sure, the “press release” type of answer I give is that I just wanted to give back to the festival, but really, it’s because I need something to mark an end.
Everybody moved on from the pandemic, while I feel I was left behind. So why not go back to the event that I felt significantly moved my life forward?
As my tuk-tuk arrives at the venue, I can’t help but look around at the faces illuminated by the projector.
Why are they all here?
Is it for work?
Is it for learning?
Is it for finding meaning?
Is it a CV stuffer?
Is it to look for solidarity as a military junta destroys the democracy of your country?
Is it for doing what you feel is your purpose?
Is it to fight against a struggle?
Is it to live your advocacy?
Is it just to be?
As my mind raced through these thoughts while digesting all the works of the participants for the 20th edition, I went back to the switches to turn on the lights (like I always do for all the projections this entire festival).
Boss Jessica went on the mic to congratulate the participants of the course, and one by one, she acknowledged everyone involved in the festival, inviting everyone in front for a photo. And as she called my name, she said, “And A.g,. who unfortunately is not here…
OH WAIT, you’re here!” As she suddenly noticed I was standing in the corner.
“It’s nice to be noticed. It’s beautiful to be remembered.” I told myself as I scrambled forward.
Take care of each other, ties everything the 20th edition of the Festival stands for: To be here is to take care. For yourself, the community, and everyone who relies on you. How fortunate is it to be remembered, to be taken care of, to be taught, to be worthy of being acknowledged, to be spoken with care, to be reminded to drink water, to be told that you are worth caring for.
If you want more information on this exhibition, please read and look over curator Dennesse Victoria’s notes here.
(This is part 3 of an ongoing journal series of my southeast asian trip last Feb. 2025, mainly volunteering for the Angkor Photofestival and Workshops. Part 1 is on Bangkok, Part 2 is about volunteering at the festival. The next part will feature a quick stop in Kuala Lumpur. Subscribe and backread to follow along.)


















































