Don't Tug On That

CROATOAN

2017-04-07T10:30:50Z

Fuck these guys.

D'width, this name. Will keep this account open and monitored as long as it's tenable.

XXX

2016-06-21T22:02:49Z

...and I continue to be the most fortunate of men.

thirty-three and a third years ago...

2013-05-24T10:23:14Z

...Bram Tchaikovsky turned up on those late-night stations, leaving me with a fondness for bands with no discernible lead guitar. I woke up this morning with "Girl of My Dreams" stuck in my head:

So obviously intended to be about a centerfold, so easily construed to be about a blow-up doll.

koan du jour (ii)

2013-04-04T12:00:26Z

What if someone called in to work joyous?

koan du jour

2013-04-04T11:40:07Z

Why would someone go to the trouble to make up hell?

n00b!!!1!!

2013-03-15T11:36:19Z

The National Zoo's spectacled bear recently dropped a pair of cubs, and the Zoo has thoughtfully provided a
video feed of Teh Cute. This has unsurprisingly sucked a substantial amount of time around here.

During last night's episode, some of the action led us to wonder about the precise arrangement of the bear's
nursing tackle, so I unthinkingly entered the search term "bear nipples."

Yow.

too good for facebook

2013-02-23T17:38:13Z

The artist formerly known as IOZ:

What, after all, is a drone strike if not a drive-by shooting?

cahiers du cinema

2013-02-13T00:12:23Z

http://www.theawl.com/2013/02/three-handjobs-is-a-trend

hope

2012-12-22T12:24:48Z

via Slashdot an ex-TSA screener's blog:

I recall one time I did a bag check on a man from Detroit, once the auto-making capital of the world. Having been informed by the x-ray operator that there was a bottle of water in the bag, I pulled it out and quickly sensed that something was slightly off. Then, I realized what it was: there was an enormous dildo rubber-banded to it. I then had an epiphany, spreading over me like a sunrise, beautiful and exhilarating: he wanted me to have to deal with the dildo. He did it on purpose. In rubber-banding that dildo to the water bottle he knew we would target, he seemed to say:

“Yes, I have a dildo, federal officer. Even after the horrors of
9/11, I am still alive; full of vitality, love, sex and, later tonight,
that large dildo rubber-banded to the water you are about to confiscate
from me. That bottle of water, bought with hard-earned American dollars
to relinquish my bodily fluids, so as to make me strong and keep the
wheels of commerce of this great nation turning. In taking my water, I
want you, federal officer, to know that the terrorists have won, and
that you are complicit. I want you to see my dildo. To hold it in your
hand; to know that I, as well as my fellow passengers and countrymen,
are strong and resilient.

That we, the people of this great nation, can, and will, snap back, like that rubber band.”

Plenty more where that came from.

"countereducation"

2012-10-15T22:53:18Z

A neat blog I stumbled on (oops) mulls a concept I - and probably most public-educated folks - have frequently mulled:

[...]
Take, for example, Shakespeare. How many millions of people are turned away from recognizing his genius by having him stuffed down their throats at school at an age when they are not yet receptive to his language and psychological insights? Wouldn’t he be even more widely and highly regarded if people were to discover him for themselves, rather than be prejudiced against him by school?
Similarly, millions are turned off of maths and science by terrible teachers.
[...]

FYI

2012-08-24T23:29:49Z

http://thehairpin.com/2012/08/the-pussy-riot-pie

your RDA of dismal (ii)

2012-08-14T23:38:37Z

Reasonable but appalling:

http://www.fem2pt0.com/2012/08/07/i-wish-my-mother-had-aborted-me/

Your RDA of dismal

2012-07-29T22:53:40Z

From Naked Capitalism:

If the Presidential campaign seems vacuous to you, that’s because it is. Here are some questions that “we” — by which I mean the legacy party campaigns, their enablers, and our famously free press — can’t seem to bring ourselves to ask during the campaign. ...

media burn or fan droop?

2012-06-02T12:43:02Z

I've been floundering my way through REAMDE since the day it came out, but I'm eating the bookification of Mongoliad up with a big old spoon. Go figure.

This makes a lot of sense

2012-01-28T00:50:53Z

http://www.toplessrobot.com/2012/01/ferris_bueller_does_not_have_another_day_off.php

One more thing: A friend once told me that he thought -- knew, actually -- that Alan Ruck's character Cameron was obviously fucking Ferris' girlfriend behind his back. Next time you see the move, pay close attention to Cameron and Sloane. You'll never unsee it.

--via The Awl (what if Gawker had lived?)

hack'n'slash

2012-01-03T04:00:41Z

https://www.nytimes.com/interactive/2012/01/02/us/you-cut-the-defense-budget.html?src=tp

I bagged $1.05 trillion.

Not the opinion, etc.

rattleback @ 2011-09-11T06:12:00

2011-09-11T10:12:18Z

If you keep picking it, it will never heal.

X

2011-08-29T10:01:55Z

Today marks ten years as a civil servant (observed). In the current entry in pepysdiary , Sam and his officemates:

[...] read over this paper of my Lord Keeper's, wherein are laid down the faults of the Navy, so silly, and the remedies so ridiculous, or else the same that are now already provided, that we thought it not to need any answer, the Duke of York being able himself to do it: that so it makes us admire the confidence of these men to offer things so silly, in a business of such moment. But it is a most perfect instance of the complexion of the times!

A useful reminder about why I shouldn't be such a candy-ass about writing and publishing.

XXV

2011-06-21T23:53:46Z

...and I remain the most fortunate of men.

in-depth coverage

2011-05-20T01:26:46Z

http://www.mirror.co.uk/news/top-stories/2011/05/18/pippa-middleton-s-bum-pippa-reveals-secret-behind-her-perfect-derriere-115875-23139528/

tacorama

2011-05-16T00:11:03Z

I was going to fry chicken tonight in some of the surplus bacon grease principaltogar 's food paradigm shift has generated, but Whole Foods had fresh whole wheat tortillas, so I tried out a recent notion.

I filmed a cookie sheet with some of the aforementioned grease, dashed some seasoned salt on it, then put chicken thighs on the sheet skin-up, then put everything into a cold oven set to 450F, with the timer set for forty minutes. When the oven hit four-fifty, I sprinkled some more seasoning on top of the chicken, then ignored it until the timer went off. I broke loose the thighs and the fond with a spatula, put the cookie sheet on an incline, and left the thighs and salvaged crusty goodness to rest and drain about five minutes.

Come time to eat, for each tortilla I took one thigh, removed and reserved the skin, and raked the meat off the bone. the meat went on the tortilla, followed by salsa, topped with the skin and a ration of pan goo. My Vision was for salsa verde, but my Vision turned out to be rubbish, or maybe the salsa was. Anyway, garlic-chile Cholula hot sauce turned out to be a better choice.

Nom. I will do it again

fashion note

2011-03-09T20:41:07Z

I just spotted the first pair of man-jeggings near 15th&P.

Actually, he seemed to be making it work. I don't know what that says about who.

we love him just the same

2011-01-28T19:20:57Z

Baby anteater communique'.

Head-asplodin' cute, but I'm kind of concerned about the numerous hints that the (premature) pup may be, uh, special.

rattleback @ 2011-01-23T14:25:00

2011-01-23T19:25:51Z

I wish this aside from Will Wilkinson didn't resonate with me:

I’ve been thinking seriously of making a number of cartoon dialogues on divisive questions because, ironically enough, I think the comic book format is capable of a less cartoonish examination of hard questions than one normally encounters in documentaries.

shameless philistinism

2011-01-07T12:12:01Z

I'm reading the new Girl Genius novelization, and it works better than I'd have thought. The literary-fiction types who always go on about "show, don't tell" should probably take their meds before opening the book, but I've always thought that main thing following that maxim too closely gets you is an MFA in creative writing.