a lass that is gone.

163. State of the pups

2012-09-11T01:21:59Z

I typically only like to do this every six months but we're close at five, so oh well.

STATE OF ME FIRST: I'm on some kind of hiatus. My dad's still in renal failure. His heart isn't keeping up well. He doesn't know where he's at or what's happening. Some hours I want to RP something, but then I just feel horrible and cry, and I can't get a tag out. So, I guess I sort of want to RP, but I don't want to drag out threads, especially when I have three or four in progress already that I haven't tagged back since Friday when all the shit hit the fan.

I especially hate that I couldn't finish Aibileen's exit. A goodbye was too hard, especially for a pup I genuinely loved. She just...learned her lesson and it was time to go. But it was too much.

That all being said, I'm not abandoning the pups I will still be bringing in. Life goes on, eventually. It has to.

Here's a chart with all of my current pups.

♕ Laura Roslin ♕

° Something else I'm disappointed about is missing the gathering post for Laila's third birthday. Laura mostly can't believe that her baby is a whole three years old, and that she's less baby and more little girl. I haven't had her out much which was supposed to be remedied before...yeah. She probably could use a thread with the BSG pups, would love to see Hera, connect with the bakery crew. She's quietly happy, though in the back of her head she knows Six is here, but she tries not to make it a conscious thought all the time. I'd like to get her out and about, she needs to meet some newer people.

♕ Angel ♕

° She loves first grade, and she also loves sociology. XD She's a very happy six year old, and though she doesn't know it, is about to have her very first loose tooth. She likes having David as her boyfriend, but right now she's very sad that Aibileen has left. She's mopey and quiet, and probably clinging more to those adults who know her (River, John, Erica, Puck, Charles, and some others I may have missed.) afraid that they'll leave, too. At least she did get a goodbye. Sometime soon I'd like for her to come into her canon power of being able to control people with her mind.

♕ Juliet Burke ♕

° Has the hots for Sam Axe, dude. No lie. SHE'S ALL SMOOCHY IN MY HEAD ALL THE TIME. Though who knows how much they actually do smooch. And it's effectively helped her move on. Jonah delights her to her soul, and though it hasn't been threaded in a while, she loves Faith and Claire. I'd like for her to have a post in the clinic, talking with Martha maybe, meeting Cliff Huxtable, taking over Simon Tam's duties if that's okay with Andrej.

♕ Joan Holloway ♕

° Like having sex with Neal, LOL. She needs to actually go...meet people and stuff. It's just that she's not up for a lot of bullshit, ever, so if she's bored the conversation doesn't last long. I think she'll probably meet Peter and Elizabeth eventually, and there's a plot that I can't quite remember all the details of, but I think it ends with her finding out the truth about Neal. Which, honestly, I'm...not too sure she'll run away from.

♕ Erica Evans ♕

° She's content. There may be some kind of plottage if threads wind up certain ways. But she's happy, if not sad that Aibileen is gone. If there's not plottage, I need to do something with her other than work, work out, and take care of the baby.

♕ Belle ♕

° New and I haven't even intro'ed her in the OOC yet. Oops. She's not arriving until Rumpelstiltskin does, which should be in a week or two anyway.

♕ Zoe Washburne ♕

° Quietly living life not shooting people. She misses her Captain, but what can you do? Maya is currently very nearly seven months old and it makes her heart ache. It's going so fast. She needs this time, needs it with Wash, but she also loves seeing her baby come into her own little personality.

♕ Donna Noble ♕

° Donna's happy; she's happy with Declan and happy with her friendships, but she's also been wanting to live in the TARDIS. She misses going. She misses the alien planets and getting into scrapes, and all of that. She's not enjoying being stuck at the moment, though she wouldn't want to leave Declan at this point either. She's conflicted.

♕ Mary Crawley ♕

° My plan has been to drop her this month, but with Sybil in the village...I don't know. Matt's going, and that will be hard. So, I'm still really on the fence about it all. She doesn't have much time left if she does stay. It would just be enough to spend some quality time with her sister away from Downton and the politics of it all.

♕ Regina Mills/The Evil Queen ♕

° There is nothing better than having a wicked pup. And there's a plot in the works. She has her magic. She has Rumpelstiltskin's knife. And he's coming to the village. She needs to find out very soon that the dead can come to the village and live so that she can try and come up with a spell to bring Daniel. Her true love. And then if she's successful, maybe he can be all 'lol look, you're mad at a nine year old time to move on.' and she can try to be a better person. But not before slipping someone her poisoned apple (not a euphemism) and accidentally giving any canon mates that want it, the use of magic.

♕ Michonne ♕

° It's hard for a badass to not be a badass. That being said, she's getting her practice in at the Dojo, and with Lisbeth. I am still lamenting that there was a zombie plot a relative short time ago, because I'd love to see her kick some walker ass. That also being said, she just wants to keep Sophia safe. She wants to keep this little life she has with her and Daryl as long as she can. Because who knows when they get tossed back into the fire. She's sort of intense, enjoys working with Natasha because she's also on the same wavelength. Should probably talk to McClane again about what is and isn't enforced police wise.

♕ Rue ♕

° She's sort of quietly happy. She has a crush on Xas. She enjoys part-time co-habitation with Haymitch. She REALLY enjoys working at the farm. Not much to report.

♕ Sophia Peletier ♕

° Totally oblivious to much outside of a fifth grade girl's scope of caring, lol. SHE DOES NOT LIKE ANY BOYS NONE OF THE BOYS. Should have another thread with Dale and Glenn.

♕ Rapunzel ♕

° Planning on getting her out at the marina soon. She loves everyone and everything and the whole entire village. So, she's basically over being too afraid to do anything. But that's largely in part to Sam. She brings him lunch every day, and beer, lol. She has not had a sip of alcohol yet. God, a drunk Rapunzel. GOD.

♕ Alisha Bailey ♕

° Very silently stunned that she's doing this whole committed relationship thing. I would though, like a couple of things to happen. One - she tells Faith about her power. Two - a volunteer to touch her and make her power go crazy when Simon isn't there. She needs to learn how to stop an advance at the Dojo, and I think that would give Simon the idea, possibly. Because she just sees herself as untouchable.

♕ Inara Serra ♕

° Through my own fault, some things haven't happened by now that should have. But I'd really like to get her in a thread with Kaylee soon, telling her about her heart. She's sort of come to terms with it, and needs to tell everyone. The group setting just...isn't best, probably. I have no idea how it'll go telling Jayne, lol. I'd also like to have her sleep with a couple of people as Companion - people who need healing and affection, both men and women.

♕ Clair Huxtable ♕

° Happy teaching. Really needs a thread with Cliff; I screwed the pooch on a dinner date. She misses her kids and finds herself wishing someone else from home would show up.

Plots to Plan

I'm open, hit me.

Any of mine are up for suggesting threads, I'M ALL ABOUT IT.

Pups or fandoms I've been considering:

Amy Pond is coming at the end of her arc on the show, Maggie Greene (The Walking Dead) will be arriving after the season 3 premiere, and Prince Charming...SIGH. I don't know. Him, I may wait on OUAT to start up again to actually (possibly) app. I'm always worried about writing guys, though.

I still really want a comedy pup, I just have no idea which one. Comedy pups, in the past, have been very difficult, because while they tend to be wacky and zany, with no canon mates to bounce that wakcy zany off of, it gets hard to maintain. Possible fandoms would be: Parks and Recreation, Community, or Arrested Development.

I really, really, want to play Gwen DeMarco (Galaxy Quest) but that's a must have for canon mates, honestly.

FOURTH ANNUAL FALL TV FRIENDING MEME

2012-09-01T20:59:04Z

The 'I possibly watch way too much t.v. and need more people to squee over it with' meme

It's that time of year again, folks! Find people who are trying new things with you, braving the cancellation roulette wheel, and settling in for the return of some old favorites. Any and all T.V. show love is welcome.

PIMPIN' AIN'T EASY.

Copy/Pasta that in your journals, IF YOU DON'T MIND.

Have fun! Make new friends! MAKE BETS ON WHAT SHOW GETS THE CUT FIRST!

Now, fill this out and slap it in a new comment!

Basics first
What is your name?:
 
How old are you?:

What time zone are you in (important for t.v. viewing/potential spoilers!)?:

What is your friending policy?:

T.V. stuff
What shows do you plan on watching this television season?:

Returning shows:
New Shows:

What are your 'guilty pleasure' shows (ANTM, anything on VH1/MTV, etc)?:

Which television show are you most excited about?:

Which television show do you think needs to improve the most?:

What do you watch outside of the Fall T.V. season (summer shows, hiatus shows, etc.)?:

Who are your favorite television characters?:

Old or current, what is your top television show of all time?:

Random junk
How often do you update?:

Is there anything else you want to tell us?:

Do you have a favorite gif or macro from a t.v. show (Please post just one or two gifs if you post a gif.)?:

131. role play

2012-08-05T07:04:43Z

This is mostly for me, so if you're not into role playing feel free to scroll on by. But this is every character I play, have played, and am considering playing. I LOVE THIS CHART, TBH.


RP CHARACTERS [CURRENTLY PLAYED] [USED TO PLAY] [CONSIDERING]

CURRENTLY PLAYED currently played at hearts&minds
Laura Roslin prophetepiphany	Angel angel_xperiment	Juliet Burke island_juliet	Joan Holloway sec_femmefatale	Erica Evans 5thcolumnfed
Belle chippedbelle	Zoe Washburne bigdamnherosir	Donna Noble donna_supertemp	Amy Pond mrsamypond	Regina Mills evil_regal
Michonne imonlysurviving	Rue fournoterue	Sophia Peletier ranthewrongway	Rapunzel atlastiseelight	Alisha Bailey awkwardfrenzy
Inara Serra didntmeanpetty	Clair Huxtable elegantclair	Maggie Greene knockawalkerout	Rachel Matheson secretofpower
[RETURN TO TOP]

USED TO PLAY previously at hearts&minds
Burton Guster bighead_burton	Maximum Ride wingsandprayers	Liz Lemon suck_lemons	Libby Taylor leaving_libby	Betty Draper bye_bye_birdy
Claire Washburn butterfly_m_e	Sylar notacompanyman	Remy Hadley rounduptolez	Allison Dubois dreamforhire	Newt callmenewt
Hugo Reyes unluckydude	Claire Littleton for_a_rainyday	Dwight Schrute fact_schrute	Sue Sylvester dontknow_orcare	Charlie Andrews myownwiki
Kara Thrace grab_yourgun	Rose Nylund justcheesecake	Tina Cohen-Chang c_caughtinalie	Piper Halliwell middlecharmed	Velma Kelly rouge_myknees
Andy Dwyer puppypendulum	Violet Harmon stuffedonbs	Lady Mary Crawley donthaveaheart
[RETURN TO TOP]

CONSIDERING thinking about playing at h&m
Coming Soon Coming Soon
[RETURN TO TOP]

124. tiny cut

2012-07-28T05:09:30Z

I removed journals that haven't been updated in at least 6 months. Though, I admittedly went sort of cross eyed and I've had a bottle of wine. SO, if you think I removed you by mistake, just comment :)

93. The shortest fic of my life

2012-05-14T23:56:39Z

Title: Monday
Author: propernice
Rating: PG - lol sorry
Fandom: LOST
Pairing: Suliet
Word count: ~330
Author's Note: Mostly because Monday's suck, I was just sitting here thinking to myself that there has to be a universe in which Mondays are A-Okay in someone's life. And so, this. It's pure fluff. Alas, my Monday wasn't good enough for smut, but YOU NEVER KNOW. There's always next time. For my wife partner findthesea!

He still smells like charcoal and smoke from cooking dinner Juliet notes, lips trailing down the middle of his back. His hair is still damp from an apparently half-assed shower, but she doesn’t care, not really. She feels his mouth graze the side of her knee where she’s kneeling next to him, and she smiles. “Can I help you?”

His chuckle is low and she can feel it; in the hum of his lips against her skin and her own on his shoulder blade now. “Just wonderin’ if we’re ever gonna get to the point here.”

She hits his shoulder lightly. “Don’t you have any patience?”

“Not when it comes to you,” he drawls, joking, and then she finds herself under him, letting out a huff of breath.

“I had a plan, you know.”

“Me too. Right now about all I’ve thought through is takin’ your clothes off.”

“Keep sweet talking like that,” she smirks, though she does raise up to let him take off her shirt. She watches his eyebrows go up when he realizes she isn’t wearing a bra.

“Goin’ commando today, Blondie?” His hands graze down her sides and to the zipper of her jeans. Tugging the pants down, he lets out a sigh of disappointment.

Juliet laughs, lifting her hips. “Just trying to keep you guessing.” When he moves over her again her hands move up his chest and across his shoulders, pulling him into a kiss.

“You always keep me guessin’,” he murmurs against her mouth. And he’s proven right when strong legs are suddenly pushing him over, and he finds himself looking up at the best damn sight there is.

“I’m finishing what I started. Have a problem with that?”

He’s both amused and turned on as hell, and James just smirks. “Knock yourself out there, Blondie.”

Her mouth drops to his chest, and the last coherent thought he has is that this is the only good way to spend a Monday.

90. state of the pups

2012-04-29T04:40:10Z

I typically only like to do this every six months because...I feel like I just did this, but eh. Oh well.

STATE OF ME FIRST: I have 13 pups. THIRT.TEEN. And I keep thinking someone needs to go, but everyone is just...geling and meshing so well that I don't see a reason to do so? I have days when I can't tag at all and I feel all stressed out over it, but that's work and life being crazy - not not wanting to RP. Also, weirdly, I've tried to branch out to other RPs and hearts_andminds is just the only one where I feel like I click. Maybe it's the laid backness of it all, the no pressure part, or maybe I've just been here so long now I'm comfortable.

Character: Aibileen Clark
aibileen
Canon: The Help
General: Aibileen has very quietly gone past the anniversary of her son's death with no real big fuss. She now has her alteration shop, works every other day taking care of Madeline McClane, has Angel every day after school at her shop, and checks in on Faith and Ed every so often. And, apparently now she'll be cleaning up after Haymitch after she gets over her initial disgust, lol.

I really, really would like for her to have a makeover of some sort. She still wears her maid uniform when she's working for the McClane's because it's what she knows. She wears dresses that are very obviously from the 60s and don't flatter her at all. She's found what she's happy doing, and now she just needs a little push toward feeling better about herself.

Sometime in the middle of May, she'll be hosting a crawfish boil because...well, because she can.

Needs threads with: Faith - I assume and handwave but it would probably be better to have them actually interact. Also, actually...talk it out. Also, after Haymitch, I think maybe she's hit her capacity on availability, lol. I honestly don't know when she does anything for herself, but she's happy with what she has now. But, other than that, if they'd just like to meet, I'm up for any interaction.

Character: Angel
angel_xperiment
Canon: Maximum Ride book series
General: Angel is a very happy, cheerful little girl. Ask her, and she'll run down the list of people who take care of her: John, Erica, Aibiee, River, Puck, and Charles. She goes to Aibileen's shop every day after school where she's been learning to sew and do all sorts of things with fabric. She's convinced that when she grows up she'll be traveling with the Doctor and River, the former whom she's just met. And Charles Xavier is currently helping her hone her telepathic abilities. She's also been attending psychology classes at the college with David. In the upcoming kid plot, she will find out that they will grow up and get married, and have a son named Alan.

On a special note: I've firmly decided that her birthday is June 20th. So she'll finally turn six!
Needs threads with: Any of the people already mentioned - anyone who has an interest in a bird girl?

Character: Donna Noble
donna_supertemp
Canon: Doctor Who
General: DONNA GOT SHOT. A victim in the cylon plot, though she was helping people run to safety and hide when it happened. It's been three months of recovery (she was shot in the stomach), but she's finally mended and ready to get back into the swing of things in the village. Her relationship with Declan has gone slow - but only because of said gunshot wound. Being bedridden and unable to do anything, has limitations. She's still technically employeed at Candy Mountain, but she's a little bored there. I may give her an OTA at the shop and see how it goes. But ultimately I'm thinking she needs a job change. (She was a temp, used to hopping back and forth between jobs, so this isn't entirely unexpected.) She's also made a fast friend in Felecia Jollygoodfellow, so that's something!

In the upcoming kid plot, her two computer generated children, Josh and Ella will arrive, which will make her finally have to confront what happened in the library.
Needs threads with: Declan ♥, River, the Doctor, people in general.

Character: Erica Evans
5thcolumnfed
Canon: V
General: Erica and John's daughter is now a whopping nine weeks old. So, still a little peanut. She does have wisps of hair though, so she's starting to take after her mother. Erica only thought that she'd want to be a full time stay at home mom - she found out a couple weeks ago that she really can't do that. She needs to be at work. That's also coupled with the fact that if she's there, John's not stuck as long doing the paperwork she normally takes care of. She's had some lingering, mixed feelings about Juliet. On one hand, she's her identical twin who is a great woman. On the other hand, she's her identical twin who slept with her husband once upon a time. The kid plot will not help things much, but she and John will have AU children, Michael (Mikey) and Lucy (not the same one from the movie) show up to tell them tales of how their version of Erica and John met when they were in college.
Needs threads with: Other police types? My sadistic brain would like the Devil to remind her that he could still fuck with her any time he wanted to. Anyone who'd like to play with her.

Character: Inara Serra
didntmeanpetty
Canon: Firefly/Serenity
General: Oh boy. Well. She's found out that she's not dying in the village. That's a big one. Mal also confronted her when she was at the hotel bar being bought drinks by a man not him. He admitted that he was jealous, that it should be him, and Inara reciprocated. A few sessions of hot sex later, and on Saint Patrick's Day, Mal finds out she's dying back home. He's drunk. He asks her to marry him. She says no. THESE TWO. They avoid each other for a good chunk of time until they meet at the beach, and he proposes again. She says only if he promises to dress nicely for the wedding, so I guess that's a yes. The next issue to tackle is convincing him to let Shephered Book perform the ceremony. During the kid plot, a mini-Malcolm will arrive.
Needs threads with: Canon mates. Soon, very soon, she's going to tell Jayne, Simon, Zoe, and formally River (who no doubt already knows) about her ailment. Though she's not sure if she wants to do it all at once, or at dinner. Oh, all of that to say that before then, if you'd like her to tell one of them separately (probably Simon, if any?) I'm all for it. I'd also like her to get to know Father Sam and other religious types. Meeting the Queen? That'd probably be a highlight.

Character: Juliet Burke
island_juliet
Canon: LOST
General: I really need to rename this journal something better. But I digress. Her little man is a whole entire year old and then some. Jonah's thisclose to walking, mostly doing it with holding onto Juliet's hands. She's made a few new friends - Faith namely, and she wants to start some kind of baby clothes/clothes/furniture consignment thing. And she's dating Jack O'Neill, a relationship that she's tentative about, only because she's afraid he'll leave, or find someone with less baggage. But she's okay now, finally. She's had a few moments with John, but mostly she tries to forget about that eight months or so. She loved him, James came back. James left - she still loves John, but he's got a happiness that she's still trying to find. She's a little jealous, truth be told.

For the kid plot, an adult Jonah will come to the village, only he's been raised by Juliet and John McClane.
Needs threads with: Jack, Faith, clinic staff? Anyone else who wants her.

Character: Laura Roslin
prophetepiphany
Canon: Battlestar Galactica
General: Laura was so messed up after the cylon attack. It took me a long time to get her to talk. She's alright now, and will benefit from having an adult Laila in the village during the kid plot. And, incidentally, Laila will be three in September. Time is flying. At one point she was going to see about teaching at the school, but she loves the bakery too much and being flexible with her hours. She is excited about helping Katniss and Peeta with their wedding, if only because she will have a very happy distraction.
Needs threads with: Ellen Tigh again, Leoben, other bakery staff. Peeta and Katniss. Like always, anyone who wants her.

Character: Lady Mary Crawley
donthaveaheart
Canon: Downton Abbey
General: Oh, Mary. She loves Matthew and were he to show up, she would marry him tomorrow. But the thing is, there is no Matthew. There is, however, a Matt. And she likes spending time with him very much. He's the type of refined, older man Sir Richard tried to be. So right now, she's trying to find a way to justify being with someone when she's technically still engaged. She has a very hard time with the idea that she'll have to be alone for the duration of her stay in the village. She's been learning about camera and photography since she's been put in charge of the studio.
Needs threads with: The Queen, certainly, Anna as always, and Matt for certain.

Character: Michonne
imonlysurviving
Canon: The Walking Dead
General: Michonne is well, she's from the season finale of the show, but more comic book canon at this point. Her entire backstory is pulled from the books. She started out living in the woods, then she met Daryl and it turned into a...hate fuck type situation until it turned out they enjoyed the sex. And then Sophia arrived and they moved into the hotel. She's had a job offer to become the village arbitrator and intends to take it.
Needs threads with: Her little family, always. John McClane, but she's so prickly I'm not sure who she'll respond positively to, and who not. YOU CAN ALWAYS TRY.

Character: Rue
fournoterue
Canon: The Hunger Games
General: Right now, there's not a whole lot going on because she's on bed rest. She came in right after her end in the book, and realistically, if she lives, it's a hard, hard wound to heal from. Right now the thing that she's enjoying the absolute most is not having to share a bed with any siblings. She does, however, want to see about working rather than going to school. She just doesn't get the point in school after never having gone a day in her life. She can read and write, and she knows how to count. What else is there, really?
Needs threads with: Effie - she needs to get her hair straightened, just so that Katniss can braid it, really. Also Haymitch. They can probably sit in gruff silence with each other - they each have stomach wounds to bond over, too! Bran Stark, Rory, other people who have been stuck for long periods of time without being able to move.

Character: Sophia Peletier
ranthewrongway
Canon: The Walking Dead
General: Sophia came to the village just after being bit, so before she'd turned. She was found in the woods of Haurvartat by Daryl and given a cure at the clinic - on hand from the village's own zombie outbreak. I'm using her canon up until she died, but then she'll be slipping into the 'mom' and 'dad' thing with Daryl and Michonne - whom she lives with now in the hotel. It's too late in the year for her to go to school, so she's mostly just hanging out - or will be.
Needs threads with: Daryl, she liked Selene, so more threads there, I think. Other kids, too. I'd like for her to meet McClane since he seemed concerned about her in the clinic.

Character: Violet Harmon
stuffedonbs
Canon: American Horror Story
General: Violet's been having a good time lazing around the comic book store, spooking some random people when she thinks she can. She's also getting comfortable in her relationship with Tate, as fucked up as it is.
Needs threads with: Tate, Mikey, Daryl because that was fun. Anyone else who wants a ghost girl. She needs to be snarky and meta with someone.

Character: Zoe Washburne
bigdamnherosir
Canon: Firefly/Serenity
General: Zoe is trying very hard to be blissfully happy. Somewhere in the back of her mind is always the fact that her husband is dead, that she'll leave him alone in this village one day. That he won't have his family anymore. But on a good day, that thought isn't the first thing she thinks of anymore. Maya is a little rolly pollie at almost three months old, smiling and laughing at her parents. For the kid plot, a twentysomething or so Maya will come to the village and leave angst in her wake, probably. And then, in June, there will be Reavers. Oh, yes. She's still learning magic, but with McGonagall gone, she will be seeking a new tutor - most likely Carlos.
Needs threads with: Wash, always ♥, her crew, and she liked Faith, a lot. Anyone else who'd like to thread with her.

Plots to Plan

I'm open, hit me.

Any of mine are up for suggesting threads, I'M ALL ABOUT IT.

Pups or fandoms I've been considering:

Arya Stark or Catelyn. I currently have Arya on reserve, but I may want to see how the rest of the season shakes out.

I've been looking at Eleven (Doctor Who) very critically. His voice is loud, however, I'm not sure I could maintain it long term.

I still really want a comedy pup, I just have no idea which one. Comedy pups, in the past, have been very difficult, because while they tend to be wacky and zany, with no canon mates to bounce that wakcy zany off of, it gets hard to maintain. Possible fandoms would be: Parks and Recreation, Community, or Arrested Development.

Also thinking about Olive Penderghast from Easy A.

None of this is like 'GONNA DO MUST DO' but if anyone wanted to try some enabling, be my guest~

51. I love Juliet Burke

2012-02-22T04:42:51Z

My guide to all things Juliet Burke. 50 things for tvrealm. THERE ARE SPOILERS. AND LARGE IMAGES. BEWARE IF YOU HAVE DIAL UP.

Fanfic

Title: Secrets In the Moon
Author: propernice
Rating: PG
Summary: Juliet is drunk in the rec room, where James finds her.

Title: It's My Birthday
Author: propernice
Rating: PG
Summary: Juliet drunk dials James on a very important night.

Title: I Think I Met You Once
Author: propernice
Rating: PG
Summary: Juliet keeps running into a familiar stranger in L.A.

Title: We Can Go Dutch
Author: propernice
Rating: G
Summary: Juliet lives two lives at once. NOTE: Written before the finale of the show.

Title: Everything's Wrong
Author: findthesea
Rating: G
Summary: Juliet's thoughts just before the group leaves Dharmaville in Season 5

Title: What is it About You?
Author: findthesea
Rating: G
Summary: Juliet and James talk just after the flaming arrows incident.

Title: How I Know You
Author: findthesea
Rating: G
Summary: Juliet and James talk on their way to the beach, post 'Because You Left.'

Miscellanious Graphics

by propernice

by propernice

by propernice

by propernice

by propernice

by propernice

courtesy of wemisslost.tumblr.com

courtesy of wemisslost.tumblr.com

courtesy of rowboatcop.tumblr.com

courtesy of rowboatcop.tumblr.com

courtesy of liamarts.tumblr.com

courtesy of neated.tumblr.com

courtesy of sawyerfords.tumblr.com

by propernice

Icons

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Icon credits
1. beyondthepen
2. chromerainbow
3. driveshaft108
4. driveshaft108
5. eggb4thechicken
6. f3iv3lin3 - deleted journal
7. f3iv3lin3 - deleted journal
8. f3iv3lin3 - deleted journal
9. flaky_artist
10. flotsamjunk
11. freckles_icons
12. garden_of_aloe
13. garden_of_aloe
14. icequeen3101
15. icequeen3101
16. icequeen3101
17. iconictea
18. airbefore
19. airbefore
20. airbefore
21. airbefore
22. airbefore
23. inthe_sunshine
24. inthe_sunshine
25. inthe_sunshine
26. inthe_sunshine
27. inthe_sunshine
28. inthe_sunshine
29. neated

If anything looks incorrect as far as credits go, let me know please.

44. thank you

2012-02-13T03:27:05Z

All of you. Thank you so very much. Your love for me is, some days, the only thing that I have. When this isn't a non public post I'll go into more detail. But I couldn't make another post without telling you all you have my heart ♥

Now then!

I had to make a thingy for tvrealm. In which I drew things. So. Please don't laugh. I had to draw ten objects from LOST, and here they are.

And I colored over the 'execute' button then spelled it wrong, trololo.

42. Before and After

2012-02-12T07:20:47Z

So, here's my Before & After Challenge for tvrealm

36. Eight short Zoe and Wash ficlets.

2012-01-25T22:57:59Z

Title: This Verse Was Made to Make Me Love You
Author: propernice
Rating: PG (for some Chinese cussing)
Fandom: Firefly
Pairing: Zoe/Wash
Word Count: ~1,579
Author's Note: These short vignettes were written for tvrealm's lyric inspired challenge. I couldn't pick just one prompt. Each section has a lyric, and I'll put them in tiny font at the end. This is only my second real attempt at Zoe/Wash fic, so. I dedicate it all to kirsteena - the Wash to my Zoe ♥ Special thanks to findthesea for reading and basically making me feel better about it all.

Mal doesn't do anything quite as good as a motivational speech. Zoe stands beside him silently, not particularly listening. They're all the same mostly: words of encouragement as gunfire rains behind them in the valleys.

"We will be victorious!"

She zones back in and turns her head just enough because they haven't been victorious yet. The fact that he even said it makes her close her eyes and say a prayer. But the troops rally enough, this small band of men who should still be boys, and Zoe yells out the next orders, to fortify their position and hold.

Nothing happens for a week, until apples rain from the sky.

------

It's almost a year they've been a crew, and Zoe hasn't said more than a couple dozen words to the pilot yet. He tries though, ai ya he tries. He makes sure to drop her name in all of the plans, and always puts her before Mal. (Mal looks at him hard every time, Zoe remains indifferent.) And every time he thinks maybe he's made a dent because she looks at him a second longer than usual or one of those dozen words is something nice, he realizes he's no closer to her now than he was nine months ago. But he keeps working at her, learns what he can through silent observation - how tense she gets when she feels like something ain't right on a run, the easy way she smiles when they get more than protein to eat.

He's explaining this, all of it to Inara in her shuttle. He has to tell someone, and Kaylee would never keep it to herself, Jayne doesn't care (and would probably suggest something crude) and Mal? Mal doesn't seem to like anyone but him within a foot of Zoe. So he goes to 'Nara, because he figures she'll have some kind of advice, doing what she does. He hedges at first, unsure. But two cups of tea later and he's talking about how strong Zoe is, that she's beautiful and intense. Wash goes quiet at the small smile playing on Inara's lips.

"What? I said too much, didn't I? I always say too much."

Inara laughs quietly and looks at him. "Behind every beautiful thing there's been some kind of pain, Wash." She goes on to elaborate but is interrupted by an incoming wave. When she doesn't come back he excuses himself and thinks about her words, and for the first time considers what she means.

Maybe it's not him.

------

Until now, Zoe never really understood it when people got caught in bed together and said they didn't mean to. But right now, after five months of sleeping with Wash, she gets it.

She didn't mean to.

When she lingered on the bridge after Wash's flying got them far away from an Alliance patrol, she idly told him he did good. He looked at her so surprised that it took her a minute to realize she'd probably never praised him since he'd known her. But it was enough, apparently, to get him to invite her to stay up and have a drink with him. She doesn't even remember saying yes, just that she was suddenly three glasses in and laughing at some stupid story about flight school.

That first night they swapped stories about flying and war, and she went to bed feeling a little lighter than she had in a while. The third night they stayed up he kissed her, she pressed back, and now it's five months down the line and he's asking her how she really feels. It's hard, considering she never meant for this to be anything.

She asked her mother once, why she'd waited so long to get married.

You hold out for the ones you know will love you.

Something else that Zoe didn't understand until Wash's earnest blue eyes are on her, waiting for her answer.

------

Wash has a habit of picking up random books from the different planets they land on. Some are in Chinese, some English. All of them are in bad shape, usually. Zoe's started grabbing one from his bunk when she spends the night with him, using any down time she has to read. This time it's some fictional history book based off of a real war almost a thousand years ago. Her fingers trail over the page and stop over a line.

Seize the day, or die regretting the time you lost.

Her eyes skim over that sentence a couple times, and she loses track of the rest of the story. The words make her think of Wash (like most things tend to now), but they make her frown, mostly. She's spent a lot of time in the past, refusing to move on from the anger and hurt of the war. She's lost too many people, had too many things taken away, so she hates that Wash doesn't get it. That her trouble with saying what he wants to hear isn't him. She wants this, wants all of him. But if she loses him it's just another loop on the laces around her neck, another reminder that people don't stay forever.

But Hoban Washburne makes her ache to let go of regret and finally live again.

------

His words make her stare at him, and in the silence of her bunk, she's very aware that he's breathing hard as he stares right back.

"Wo de ma, Zoe, why don't you get it? You don't always have to hold your head up higher than your heart. I wanna marry you. You said you love me. I get that you have barriers and walls but for once, could you see the bigger picture here? I am a man who wants to spend the rest of his life with you. All of it, because you..." He trails off as if he's defeated.

Zoe takes a step closer. "I'm what?"

"You're impossible. I never know what you're thinking. You didn't talk to me for almost a year. I should have given up and I didn't. Why? I'm crazy, maybe. But I'm not givin' up now either. I want to marry you."

All that she can do is look at him, his eyes and his face, and she knows she hurt him, not answering right away. It isn't him. It's never him.

"I did think you were crazy. Still do. But I wanna marry you, Wash."

He blinks. "Yeah?"

Her hands go to the sides of his face. "Yeah."

------

It happens fast and slow at the same time. He sees Kaylee get up, sees an orange glow, and suddenly Zoe is on her feet as fire surges into the room. He yells for her once he figures it out, not even sure if the fire is clear before he's diving to her side, landing hard on his knees. Her skin is hot but not burnt. He doesn't see anything wrong with her but she doesn't move.

He begs with her. Pleads. Has a fleeting thought after Kaylee says they hardly have any air that maybe it's better this way, but then he wants her to wake up, to tell him it'll all be okay. But she doesn't move. She never moves. He gets her into a shuttle with River and Simon, River not meaning to but giving up the secret that Zoe'd been dead for two minutes. He wants to throw up, to throw something, to curse the gorram gou shi ship.

Before he can take off, before he can do anything, he holds Zoe's face in his hands, not caring that he's crying. "You know this isn't the end. So hang on," he begs, pressing his forehead down against hers, feeling the barely there exhales against his face. He turns away to pilot the shuttle, finding her still reflection in the glass in front of him; for once not staring into the black.

------

Zoe's strapped in, and when the boat comes to a stop she's breathing a sigh of relief at Wash's voice and the fact that they're all in one piece. She hears a crack before she can even process what's happening. And then her fingers are flying over the buckle before her brain starts telling her that something bad just happened, that Wash is hurt. She can't go to dead, her mind won't let her go to dead. She grabs him by the back of his head, leans down, begs into his ear before Mal pulls her away.

Even when they're leaving Wash behind, she can't think of anything but how hard he tried for her, how he convinced her to stop worrying about opening herself up.

It seemed like yesterday this morning, and now she realizes that life goes fast. He was there. And then he was gone.

------

It's been two months. They've rebuilt. Buried Wash. Moved on. She's never talked to Mal about it, but now they're sitting in the galley, and she's trying to get it out. To tell him what he needs to know. Her thoughts are interrupted when Mal speaks, breaking the quiet.

"When you ain't got nothin', you got nothin' to lose."

Zoe stares at him, hard, before finally spilling what she needs to say.

"I'm pregnant, sir."

The silence stretches on, longer than the black.
------

The Songs
1. "We will be victorious." - Muse, Uprising
2. "Behind every beautiful thing there's been some kind of pain." - Bob Dylan, Not Dark Yet
3. "Hold out for the ones you know will love you." - Tegan and Sara, Dark Come Soon
4. "Seize the day, or die regretting the time you lost." - Avenged Sevenfold, Seize the Day
5. "You don't always have to hold your head higher than your heart." - Jack Johnson, Hope
6. "You know this isn't the end, so hang on." - Weezer, Hang On
7. "Realize that life goes fast." - The Flaming Lips, Do You Realize??
8. "When you ain't got nothing, you got nothing to lose." - Bob Dylan, Like a Rolling Stone

22. Challenge post

2012-01-12T23:57:26Z

For tvrealm

My fictional life. In my dreams. Often.

Featuring:

Zoe Washburne
Jane Williams
Jules Cobb
April Ludgate
Laura Roslin
Ron Swanson
Vincent the Dog
Erica Evans
Juliet Burke
Don Draper
Miles Straume
Jayne Cobb
Mal Reynolds
Leslie Knope
Lucille Bluth
Donna Noble
The Doctor
James Ford
River Song
Hoban Washburne

My reasons why
1. Zoe Washburne - Can you imagine how awesome I would be?
2. Jane Williams - A sister to be snarky with, who'll tell me what's up, and has an awesome husband and great friends.
3. Jules Cobb - I would never be ashamed to drink at eight in the morning on a Saturday.
4. April Ludgate - Trading dry barbs with April would make my life.
5. Laura Roslin - I imagine classes would include Airlocking 101 and How To Be a BAMF even while dying.
6. Ron Swanson - Helping me understand the value of superior wood work and fine meats.
7. Vincent the Dog - Loyal even when I leave him over and over again to do my own thing.
8. Erica Evans - A great girlfriend but ultimately won't last because I can't stand her douchebag son.
9. Juliet Burke - Love of my life, I will never love again after she dies tragically.
10. Don Draper - My rebound between Erica and Juliet, Don introduces me to the art of fine scotch and ripping my clothes off with his eyes.
11. Miles Straume - A partner who will come up with the classy one liners.
12. Jayne Cobb - I'll never know when he's going to try and kill me for money, but that's okay because while he is loyal to me, he'll shoot people in the face.
13. Mal Reynolds - He'll carry me when I can't crawl. Or run.
14. Leslie Knope - The best of sidekicks who will bring me waffles and never sleep while planning my life for me. While I sleep.
15. Lucille Bluth - Will never take shit from anyone and possibly frighten them with her winking and drunken air quotes.
16. Donna Noble - Will never tell me I need to dress a certain way, just let me be me.
17. The Doctor - Dances about as well as I do.
18. James Ford - will make up a nickname for me and three years later we'll be sexing every night.
19. River Song - If I get lost, will travel space and time to find me.
20. Wash - Will never give up on me, and will never leave me behind.

9. State of the Pups Address

2012-01-05T00:45:06Z

It's been six months, so it's time! All of these characters are played at hearts_andminds.

Character: Juliet Burke island_juliet
Canon: LOST
General: Jonah is nine months old! He's officially lived on the outside world for as long as Juliet was pregnant. For the second time, James is gone but lol what's new in her life. But Jack O'Neill is being all manly and Jonah likes him, and Jack is not hard on the eyes, so idk we'll see. I'd say she's doing about 100% better this time around since last time I believe she was sleeping with John in approximately .10 seconds. Anyway, she works at the clinic again full time since you know, she can't be a stay at home mom anymore. She kind of loves it because she likes being doctory but then she misses her baby, too.
Needs threads with: More Jack please, Magnus, John, other doctor people.

Character: Erica Evans 5thcolumnfed
Canon: V (2009)
General: She's happy-ish! I mean, you know. She's seven months pregnant and her first son is still dead, and he still disappeared but she's trying to work through it. The holidays were rooooough. She stayed sequestered in her bedroom during Thanksgiving, so my apologies to anyone who was at the McClane household for that. Christmas was better because she was bound and fucking determined to make this the best Christmas ever for him. She's working less the further along in her pregnancy she gets, and I don't think she actually ever...officially told John. I mean, he's the boss AND her husband so basically 'lol I think I'll stay in bed today' is as much notice as he gets. Maybe that's an issue, idk.
Needs threads with: John, of course ♥. Puck, just the two of them hanging out, goofing. Maybe cooking some stuff. Or some such shenanigans. Other cop type people. Also Magnus. Let's just give Helen all the Liz Mitch face friends. Oh, and Margaret so they can bump bellies or something, lol.

Character: Aibileen Clark aibileen
Canon: The Help
General: Aibileen is doing well. I'm toying with the idea of giving her a tailor type shop. She sews and knits and makes all the things, but she wouldn't want it to interfere with taking care of Angel and the general McClane household. Plus, when the baby is born, even though no one will ask her to, she'll be around more. Maybe, somehow, via word of mouth people can start asking her to repair things? The anniversary of Trelore's death is coming up, she's not looking forward to that day, she wants to ask off for it but also doesn't want to have to tell John why. Other than that though, she's so content that she's a rare tag. Happy pups are quiet pups, which is a bummer sometimes.
Needs threads with: John, maybe River Song, actually, since they met once I think. Right? She liked Connor when they met, he was very nice to her. Crack thought because my brain went there: She'd be an awesome companion. IDK WHY I THOUGHT THAT. Maybe if Dorothy is still around, they could have a thread too?

Character: Laura ~~Roslin~~ Ise-I'let prophetepiphany
Canon: Battlestar Galactica
General: IDK she's happy right now, which, I guess that's going to change soon? Six is going to make cylons and kidnap her, so that will cause angst. And she'll try not to look at Leoben and be all "UGH CYLON DEEP DOWN YOU STILL WANT TO KILL ME." In other news though, Laila is 2 and VERY TWO, and potty training has just come to a stand still because Laila hates the potty a metric ton. HATES. So there's that. Laura's also slowly getting comfortable giving Peeta a little more responsibility at the bakery the longer he works there.
Needs threads with: Jos. SHE NEEDS A SEXY THREAD WITH JOS. Date night. Peeta and Katniss either together or separate, Margaret, Leoben, Six, Father Sam, basically all the pups because she should know other people too. I think she's starting to slowly become one of those pups who's just been there for so long she knows the gossip or whatever.

Character: Zoe Washburne bigdamnherosir
Canon: Firefly/Serenity
General: Eight months pregnant. Not sure how confident she is about it now that she's super close to having this kid. She really wants Wash because this is a big scary thing she was supposed to do with him. And okay, I really want a Wash, but considering my luck, I won't even push it. I think she'll get along with Mal there. Also, she loves being a unit leader, and she'll be bummed if some shit goes down between now and being all healed up after the baby. She's ready to fight. PS: She's also learning magic because if she's going to be in charge of a group defending the village, she needs to be able to defend against all things, demon, regular garden variety asshole, or magic.
Needs threads with: ~~Canon mates please. Especially Mal~~ Simon. Simon, she wants you to deliver the baby with no disrespect toward any of the other doctors. It's just. it'll be him on Serenity too ~~no matter what Mal says about staying on a moon for a while when she's close to her due date~~ because ~~fuck the Alliance hospitals~~ she trusts him. So she should probably go see him at some point. Also, her unit, the members she hasn't interacted with yet. Never mind about other canon mates since over half of them just dropped 10 seconds ago.

Character: Donna Noble donna_supertemp
Canon: Doctor Who
General: Donna has actually decided she 90% likes the village 10% does not, since Amy left and now she kind of sees what that trickle effect is. She does feel a little better having met Eleven, and I thought it would be a thing, but it's not at all, so that's good. She's met Declan (from Sanctuary) and she makes eyes at him and they've had drinks and she wants to kiss him, so there's something. But I'm loving that more than you could possibly know. Also, living with Ten is the best thing and the worst thing because pretending she's not dating someone is a good time when it comes to Ten's one billion questions about it.
Needs threads with: Declan, Ten, Rory (she'll want to check up), River (omg how have we only done one thread with them), okay so all of the Who people, Once she's officially dating Declan, lol the Sanctuary pups because I imagine each of them will have some things to say. He offered her a job and honestly, Donna snarking with Tesla just made me legit LOL. Anyone else who wants her can have her~

Character: Angel (with wings) angel_xperiment
Canon: Maximum Ride
General: Playing Angel is T R I C K Y. And it is because she's only five and unlike David she can't just wander the village by herself. John and Erica are too coppy for that. (lol what even is that word, w/e.) So anytime I play her it's very limited, like the school, at the park, but it's not just around the village. So I need to do something with her, I'm just trying to think about it, and I've been thinking so long I'm probably going to hit roll call, oooops.
Needs threads with: Puck, John, David, Mary Winchester, are there any other little kids left? But anyway, people who will let her read their mind and freak them out. Oh, and Spencer Reid. Oh and one of the Doctors. Or Both. OH, and Magnus. OH AND ALSO FELECIA because since talking to Donna and being all "LOL YEAH RIGHT" about the things/people in the village I've wanted to toss Angel over.

Plots to Plan

I'm open, hit me.

Um also, formal apologies on if I screwed the pooch on any longer threads after the great comment 'IT WASN'T BROKEN BUT WE FIXED IT' LJ update. I just...cannot be bothered to wade through all that to figure out where we left off, especially not in a post like the Christmas ball. SO.

Any of mine are up for suggesting threads, I'M ALL ABOUT IT.

Pups or fandoms I've been considering:

American Horror Story (Constance or Vivien, not sure on anything yet.)

Don't laugh but lol Ariel or Belle

Thinking about Betty Draper making a come back but idk I hate what the show did to her so much I feel like I sort of want to play her but not all the time.

Either Prim or Rue (The Hunger Games) which I've legit been thinking about since I read the books back in February last year.

None of this is like 'GONNA DO MUST DO' but if anyone wanted to try some enabling, be my guest~

3. you can't take the sky from me - for tvrealm

2012-01-03T04:48:02Z

There are dozens of shows that have been canceled way before their prime. I could have picked any one of them - Arrested Development, My So Called Life, or Freaks and Geeks would be on the short list. But instead, I'm going with the one that was completely screwed from the beginning. Because FOX decided to not only air the episodes out of order which led to confusion, but never aired it consistently and never gave it the backing and promotion it deserved.

What show am I talking about?

That's right - the Joss Whedon show gone too soon, Firefly.

Some people just assume this show isn't for them because really - space western? What does that even mean? At least, that's what I thought. But then I turned on an episode and was lucky enough to land randomly on one that displayed how this crew of nine people worked together, meshed together, and ultimately became a rag tag sort of family. And that's what sold me - the people. The characters who unfortunately didn't get a chance to really bloom. There are fourteen episodes to get to know everyone from Mal to Zoe, plus a movie. How many television fandoms can say they continued to live on in film?

Since it's the characters that bring so much joy to the show for me, I'm sharing them with you.

Malcolm "Mal" Reynolds

"We have done the impossible, and that makes us mighty."
Captain of a Firefly class ship named 'Serenity.' War hero and loyal leader. Fights with honor and for what's right. Not a thief...well, he is a thief. But the point is, he doesn't do anything to anyone that he can't back up.

Zoe Washburne

"When you can't run, you crawl. And when you can't do that, you find someone to carry you."
Space BAMF extraordinaire. Wife of Wash and second-in-command to Mal. She'll shoot first and ask questions later if you mess with her husband, and she'll come up with a plan to rescue her friends when the odds are stacked against her.

Hoban "Wash" Washburne

"Curse your sudden, yet inevitable betrayal!"
A leaf on the wind, watch how he soars. Pilot of Serenity. Secret connoisseur of the ancient history of Earth-That-Was. Specifically: dinosaurs. Husband of Zoe. Hero pilot.

Inara Serra

"Every well-bred petty crook knows that the small concealable weapons always go to the far left of the place setting."
An elegant companion - NOT a whore. She brings class and grace to the firefly. Contact by appointment only, and don't ever underestimate her skills with weapons. Man or machine, she likes things with a bit of mileage on them.

Jayne Cobb

"You know what the chain of command is? It's the chain I go get and beat you with 'til you understand who's in ruttin' command here!"
The hero of Canton, a man they call Jayne. Hired muscle man. Giant ape. Not afraid to wear a hat that his mother made for him. Sometimes his intentions are foggy, but he'll still go rescue his captain. Mostly because then he can play with his favorite gun, Vera.

Kaylee Frye

"You like ships. You don't seem to be lookin' at the destinations. What you care about is the ships, and mine's the nicest."
The heart of the ship. She keeps their girl running and never apologizes for the dirt on her face. She's always smiling - if she believes it, it's true. Loyal to her friends and Serenity.

Simon Tam

"No matter what you do, or say or plot, no matter how you come down on us… I will never, ever harm you."
A brother who gave up his life for his sister. Adopted by the captain and his crew as a refugee on the run from the law. May or may not get flustered by a certain cute mechanic. But before everything, he'd go to the end of the 'verse for River Tam.

River Tam

"No power in the verse can stop me."
Also? She can kill you with her brain. Not just gifted, but a gift. Can do absolutely anything, literally. Will put a bullet in you with her eyes closed as easily as play tag with a friend.

Shepherd Book

"If you take sexual advantage of her, you're going to burn in a very special level of Hell. A level they reserve for child molesters and people who talk at the theater."
A man of God and something more. No killing, but the bible's a little fuzzy on the subject of taking out kneecaps. Was once wary of the crew he's proud to call family.

Serenity: The Movie

So you've finished all fourteen episodes and now what? Put in the movie. You get a little bit of closure and the chance to say goodbye. But be warned: Joss Whedon is a dick.

Zoe and Wash

"Have you seen what she wears? Forget about it. Have you ever been with a warrior woman?"
A true to life couple. They love each other. They fight. They make up and grow stronger. A true love not fabricated. Born out of initial distaste on Zoe's part, goofy and sincere won out.

Kick ass women

The women of Serenity are tough. They keep the crew together. They keep the boat in the air. They will defend the crew and the team they love. Don't get in the way of the woman of Firefly. They'll make you regret it.

Watch this show.

You'll thank me later.

Before I go read:

2011-12-31T22:10:12Z

Hello, 2012!
friending meme with a directory

gift post!

2011-12-26T07:43:00Z

To inthegiggleloop!

Parks and Recreation.

Credit fuuurs

Parks and Rec season three bloopers part one.

Parks and Rec season three bloopers part two.

Pushing Daisies.

Credit fuuurs

Wallpaper from fanpop.

Credit solar_contrast

Community.

Credit fuuurs

Doctor Who.

Credit solar_contrast

If I could cast some votes

2011-12-24T22:02:53Z

My Emmy ballots for tvrealm.

Outstanding actress in a drama series
Outstanding drama series
Outstanding actress in a comedy series
Outstanding comedy series
Outstanding BAMF

here we go.

2011-12-21T13:38:12Z

I've created all of my role play journals over at dreamwidth. And I don't know if that means I'll be using them, but at least they're all here. And guess what other user name was available that I snagged?

wecangodutch

I DON'T KNOW WHICH ONE TO USE AS MY MAIN JOURNAL. Should I stay the same, propernice, and use wecangodutch for something else?

Anyway if you're on DW please let me know, friend me, etc. I'm messing around here and about to make myself late for work. Though...I plan on working on all the journals, getting user info and icons done...at work, lol.

Honestly, it's not even JUST the commenting thing. It's the fact that livejournal apparently has such blatant disregard for their user base and that they don't give a shit about what we have to say at all.

I'm actually using my DW to post this now, btw.

Completed big bang.

2011-11-20T21:21:42Z

Title: What We Didn't See
Author: propernice
Fandom: LOST
Ships: Suliet/Jacket
Rating: G through N-17
A/N: 100 drabbles. 100 words each. You know how good or bad you are at writing when
you get to exactly 99 words but YOU'RE DONE. This was a labor of love. I feel like there
are only so many moments to live with these characters, but here are 100 more. This is for tvrealm's big bang challenge that we knew about in September but I actually only completed about 18 hours before it was due. I'm a masochist that way. I would like to dedicate this to all the people who have forgotten about these characters since the show ended. I hope you all comment. I'll be extremely straight forward here - this time I need comments so that the past 72 hours weren't spent in vain. Because this wasn't just about points. It was about getting to know little nuances of years we never saw.

For the mods: Every prompt for every drabble is listed here per the rules. The second number corresponds with the order in the finished fic itself.

001. Juliet smiles and nods, because that’s what she’s supposed to do. She takes pictures and hugs her new family, and tells her father she’s happy for him and Tracie. And then, when everyone’s inside doing the electric slide, she drinks straight out of the wine bottle she swiped from the open bar and sits against the side of the building. She hates this. Hates that at nineteen she’s getting some new family that cares about her about as much as she gives a shit about them. But when she goes back in she’s smiling.

She’s already an expert at hiding.

002. She’s sitting with her sister, a carton of ice cream between them, Mittelos Bioscience brochures spread around them. “I have to tell them tomorrow,” Juliet says, looking up at Rachel.

“So? The answer’s still the same, what’s the problem?”

“You think mom would have wanted me to go?”

“She’d totally be on my side, pushing your ass out the door.”

Juliet laughs, taking a bite of the ice cream. “I’m gonna miss you getting fat.”

Rachel hits her lightly. “You’ll be back in time to see me waddling plenty.”

Juliet takes a deep breath. She’s going to tell them yes.

003. As soon as Juliet leaves Ben’s after her outburst, she finds the rum in her own house. She hates him. God, she hates him, and she knows he’s lying. He’s kept her here and her sister is dead, her family more than likely thinks she’s dead, and she might as well be. Held hostage in a place she can’t escape with no hope of leaving.

Downing three shots back to back, she gasps and wipes at her mouth, sinking to the ground of her kitchen and covering her face.

She has nothing left. Benjamin Linus has taken everything from her.

004. As Ben rattles off instructions for her to go to the cages and try to talk to the Southern one, Juliet makes sure that her face is perfectly blank, never conveying how much she hates him. How she’s planning to turn her back on him the first chance she gets. She hates him, more than she thinks she’s ever loathed another human being.

“Do you understand, Juliet?”

She look right at him, holding his eyes, her lips pressed in a thin line. Get James to tell her something personal. One small fact to use against him later.

“I understand, Ben.”

005. "So what, you tase a guy and don’t even tell him your name?"

Juliet pauses with her back to the polar bear cage.

"You could help me. You don’t fit in with these yahoos anyway."

At that, she turns slowly, tilting her head to the side to look at him. "You don’t know anything about me, James."

She uses his proper name, making him hesitate. "Just let me outta here."

A very faint, barely there smile crosses her lips. "You’re not worth the risk. Sorry."

Juliet walks away, and James is left alone, slumping against the cage’s bars in defeat.

006. When she tosses him the canteen, James looks at her like he might mouth off. Juliet wonders for a second if he’s dumb enough to charge, but then he’s dumping out the water like a child with something to prove. As if she’s supposed to be personally offended. Tilting her head to the side, she wonders what kind of reaction he was hoping to get out of her.

She says nothing, and they hold each other’s eyes until he gives up. It doesn’t matter. In a few minutes she’ll duck out to fill the cage’s reserve with fresh water anyway.

007. When Juliet walks out of the rec center, she pauses in the dark, slipping into a shadow to lean against someone’s house. Tom’s, she thinks. Kate thinks she wants to hurt them. That Juliet’s in on this grand plan to either wipe them all out or convert them to Ben’s side. She’s not even sure what Jack thinks, and Kate’s attempt to take her out eats away at the confidence she’d built.

Playing both sides until she can get away from Ben was never going to be easy.

Convincing the survivor’s that she’s with them is going to be impossible.

008. She sits alone on the beach, her back to everyone as she tries to figure out what the hell she’s doing. She has instructions from Ben to sabotage the survivor’s camp. She’s connected with Jack and he trusts her. But all she really wants is a ticket off this island.

She doesn’t care about making ties with anyone. Or about whom she killed back on Hydra Island, or about Ben wanting more pregnant women.

She stares out at the ocean, trying to keep it together even when she’s sitting by herself.

All that Juliet Burke wants is to go home.

009. She remembers the way the words came out of her before she had time to really think about them.

And the last thing that either of you need right now is more blood on your hands.

She’ll never forget the way they looked at her, James and Sayid, at the way James tensed when she took away the case of medicine.

Even now, as she watches him sleep with one arm thrown over her stomach, she wonders. What did he think about the woman he hated knowing everything about him? More importantly: what does he think about her now?

010. Juliet needs to stop with the alcohol, she knows. But the thing about the shitty DHARMA rum is that it goes down smooth at least. Or maybe she’s just that desperate to forget the bright orange burst of light on the horizon and the billowing black smoke.

Everything she’d fought for. Killed for. Up in smoke.

So maybe she’s getting a little drunk on the beach by herself, away from the rest of the people huddled up, crying and scared. She hears someone ask what do we do without Jack? and she rolls her eyes, moving further down the beach.

011. It’s not that Juliet ever thought she’d have a life with Jack Shephard in the picture. Just that she assumed he cared about getting her off the Island, that he’d be the one to stay behind and make sure everyone else left before him. After all, he’s tried to be the definition of a hero since she met him, why put himself first now?

She feels ridiculous, getting drunk on the beach, watching the whole damn plan blow up. Literally.

Because all that she can think is that he may be dead, but at least he got off the Island.

012. He’s not really thinking when he grabs her hand. The arrows are coming fast, and when he turns back he’s watching her try to put a guy out. Noble, but he don’t really want to see her in flames.

(A few weeks ago, he might not have minded.)

She’s protesting even as they run, her hand tight in his. When they finally stop, out of breath and panting hard, he’s still holding onto her. They lock eyes and for a second he wants to say something to her. He lets go of her though, looking away. But something’s already changed.

013. James watches Juliet stare out at the ocean, a breeze moving her hair. He’s pulled off the riskiest lie of his life, getting Richard Alpert to back down, buying time with Horace. But now he’s positive the biggest challenge is sitting right in front of him on the dock.

She sighs, and he thinks back on everything they’ve done the past few days, capped off with her shooting someone to save his ass.

Needing her isn’t so much a part of the con as it is his own realization that he needs her. He walks forward.

"Bought us two weeks."

014. Her two weeks are over, and she’s sitting on the dock, legs crossed as she stares out at the water quietly.

“Sub left an hour ago. You gonna swim outta here?”

Juliet looks up at him, then stands so that she can look right at him. “I want you to understand that I only stayed for one reason.”

He looks right back at her. “Why?”

A few seconds of silence go by before she speaks again. “You. I stayed because you asked me to, James.”

She walks away and he stands there, not sure what he’s supposed to do next.

015. “You’re never gonna hit the target LaFleur, just give up,” Juliet calls from behind the plexi-glass. She’s sitting over a tank of water on a little plastic bench, taunting James.

“Let’s put some money on it, Blondie. I know I can win.”

“Okay; you strike out, you buy my next book. You win, I’ll buy yours.”

He throws a ball. Strike one.

“I guess you don’t care about reading.”

Strike two.

“I hear Stephen King has a new novel!”

He throws and hits the target, and she goes under. He grins when she comes up. “No Stephen King for you.”

016. “It’s not that hard! Take them off at the door to avoid getting dirt all over the house!”

“It’s just a little dirt! It cleans off.”

“And I do all the cleaning so take them off at the door.”

He pauses. “Are we fightin’ about some damn boots?”

She looks at him, arms crossed over her chest. “Just yours. Please. Humor me, okay?”

They stare at each other for a second before he toes off the boots, right at the door and she sighs. “Thank you.”

“Get me a beer,” he jokes.

She hurls a throw pillow at his head.

017. James is watching her out of the corner of his eye. He has no clue if she knows, but he’s been watching her read, trying to figure her out. When she gets to a good part she starts biting on her bottom lip, tugging it between her teeth. And when she gets to a really good part, her lips start mouthing the words she’s reading.

It’s adorable, though he has this feeling that if he said that out loud, she’d tase him again. And this thing between them is so new, he treads carefully. But he’s committing this to memory.

018. “You didn’t have any right,” she says, voice cold as she stares at James, jaw clenched so tightly she can hear her teeth grinding.

“So I read a few pages of your diary. It ain’t like you don’t know everythin’ about me already. Figured it’s my turn.”

“Like it’s a pissing contest? I knew what I did because I didn’t have a choice. You’ve lived with me for a month and you think I owe you something? Screw you.”

She doesn’t wait for him to answer. She leaves the house and hates that she agreed to stay on the island.

019. Juliet’s really not sure about this thing that’s supposed to be a meatloaf sitting in the middle of the dining room table. “Just try it.”

James is even less sure. “Thought we were gonna eat at Miles and Jin’s place?” he asks.

“They canceled. Come on, just try it. It can’t be that bad, right?” Well, she can hope anyway, that it won’t kill him.

“Fine, fine,” he says bravely before picking up the fork and taking a small bite. Then another, and he smiles. “We gotta work on your presentation."

She grins in relief and sits down to eat.

020. Juliet’s watching James sort of fumble over his words, and it’s endearing in a way she didn’t think possible.

“So you wanna go or not?” he asks, and that shakes her out of her thoughts.

She has no clue what he’s asking her, but she can’t say no. She can’t say yes either, but he looks so damn eager it’s killing her. So she comes up with something on the fly.

“Ask me again in a week. Give me some time.”

That seems to pacify him for the moment, and she closes her front door, grinning and leaning against it.

021. They’re sitting on the couch talking. Just shooting the shit, her legs across his lap, when he decides to tell her about the time when he was fourteen and decided to steal his uncle’s truck but didn’t quite know how to drive a stick.

“Ended up about four houses down, stuck in the damn pig pen.”

When she laughs, it’s full bodied, head thrown back, and James notices she has a dimple of her own. His new goal as they tread this new relationship slowly is to get her to laugh just like that, as often as he possibly can.

022. Juliet knows everything about James, including that he has a daughter. What she didn’t know was that he’s never met her. She finds out over beers in the back of a van.

"Some days, I wonder enough about her, I think I wanna see her. Other days..."

He trails off, so Juliet rests her hand on his arm lightly in support.

"Most days I figure she’s better off not knowin’ I exist."

Sighing softly for him, Juliet’s head falls against his shoulder. "I bet she’s just like you."

James shakes his head before finishing his beer. "Here’s hopin’ she ain’t."

023. When her hands drag down his sides, his breath falls in a panting gasp against her neck and she tries to memorize that sound. Just in case he decides this was a onetime thing and he leaves her bed before the sun comes up. She wants to remember this, and him, and the way he feels.

He thrusts into her and she calls out his name quietly, pressing her forehead against his cheek as they move together. It’s been five months of flirting and teasing and now they’re here, and she can’t help but wonder if he means it all.

024. She’s lying naked with him, her head on his chest and speaking softly.

“My mom died about six years before I came here. I spent a lot of time taking care of her and then…after she died I got divorced. Then my sister got sick.”

“Had it kinda rough,” James says, kissing the top of her head.

“I got used to it. Not having anything good for very long. That’s why I was so afraid of this.”

James tugs her up to look at her. “I ain’t goin’ anywhere, Blondie. You believe me?”

She bends to kiss him. “I do.”

025. Juliet cracks open a DHARMA beer, drinking it a little guiltily.

An hour later when James gets home, she’s reading quietly on the couch and looks up when he bends to kiss her. He indulges a little before he gets up to wash the day away. She’s not reading anymore, just listening, and when he pads barefoot to the kitchen and opens the fridge, she braces herself.

“Who drank my last beer?” he asks, as if they have roommates.

“I had a long day,” she apologizes.

He stands in front of her, then bends to kiss her. “You owe me.”

026. When his hands move over her shoulders and down her back, she knows his destination before he gets there. Juliet is finally showing him her brand with no hesitation, no excuses, and no fear.

"They marked you." His voice is quiet, firm.

"They didn’t kill me," she points out to James, her own voice low.

His fingers trace the raised lines. "I’m sorry."

"Why?"

“’Cause you got it on account of savin’ me.”

Her eyes close when his lips drag across her skin. “I’d do it again, you know.”

His lips pause for a moment in their exploration. “I know.”

027. She showed it to him a week ago, her brand, and now she’s suffering the curve of his tongue tracing the raised edges of the mark. The burn itself is numb, and maybe that’s why the skin around it feels especially sensitive.

Whatever it is, the way he’s studying it with his mouth, she wishes she’d showed him sooner.

“Are you done inspecting?” she asks when he finally lies beside her.

“For now.” His hands gravitate toward her lower back as he tugs her close and pulls her over him. “I plan on being more thorough later.”

She can’t wait.

028. Juliet’s still flushed, still panting as James kisses his way back up her stomach. She hums, heartbeat slamming in her ears but slowly finding its normal rhythm again. When his tongue circles a nipple she murmurs quietly, but then his lips are kissing the curve of her breast and she feels him smile.

“What?” she asks lazily.

“You got a freckle. Right here.” He licks the spot and she grins, tugging her bottom lip between her teeth.

“Pay as much attention to it as you want.”

She laughs when he does before pulling him over her and into a kiss.

029. Juliet’s never seen James like this: tense and wound up, pacing their living room, and she looks up at him from the couch. "Just tell me," she says softly. "What did you do?"

He pauses his pacing to look at her, eyes a little desperate like he’s afraid she’ll leave.

"I killed Anthony Cooper. Sawyer. He was in the Black Rock, and I killed him."

She blinks, because she wasn’t expecting that. But when she looks at his face and the way he’s staring at her, she shoves her questions aside and grabs onto his hand.

She’s not going anywhere.

030. When she looks at him after a year of living with him, she realizes somewhere in the three months they’ve been sleeping together that she loves him. She hates it and wants it at the same time. She needs the way he looks at her; the way he says her name.

When James looks at Juliet and realizes he loves her, he can’t say the words. Not because of his past, his record, or his ex-flames. He can’t say them because when he looks at her, he can still see the cracks of her past.

He’s determined to fix it.

031. Juliet can’t cook. Period.

Most times, he offers to cook. He don’t know much, but his aunt taught him a little back in the day. It would save him and Juliet both a lot of time. But she tries, he has to give her credit for that, and he smiles a little as he watches her from the couch over his book. She’s staring into a pot, looking pretty pleased, and he thinks maybe she’s onto something. Getting up, he walks into the kitchen.

“What’s cookin’ good lookin’?”

Laughing softly, she turns to kiss him instead of answering his question.

032. Juliet’s not sure how to tell him she loves him and make it mean as much as she feels. There’s an ache with how good it feels when he looks at her a certain way; how he drags his fingers down the back of her neck when they kiss. This is what she never had with anyone else. This is the ache that makes her feel whole.

She shows him in the way her body tangles with his and her mouth glides over his skin. She tells him every day, and still she burns with the need to say more.

033. "I was sleeping with a married man, James."

"You know how many married women I slept with?"

Juliet opens her mouth to say something, but it closes again quickly. They stare at each other silently until she looks toward her cup and takes a sip of rum. "I guess it doesn’t matter now."

"Just 'cause we’re stuck in Dharmaville?"

Her head tilts slightly and she shakes her head. "Because I love you. And it doesn’t matter."

James takes her cup and finishes what’s left. "You’re right. It don’t matter."

"You believe me?"

He looks at her again and smiles.

"Yeah."

034. When he comes in from finishing up his mid-shift, the house is dark. Toeing off his boots, he stops in the bathroom and takes a shower, washing the day away before heading into his bedroom. Their bedroom now, as of two nights ago.

Not bothering with boxers, he sits on the edge of the bed and is just about to get comfortable when she starts snoring. Looking over his shoulder, she’s completely out, so exhausted from her day that she’s snoring. It surprises him into quiet laughter and he lies down, spooning behind her gently, falling asleep to the sound.

035. He’s gone just long enough to know that when he gets back, she’s been worrying. But he kisses her slight frown. “Come on. We’re takin’ a drive.” James takes her hand and leads her to a waiting jeep.

They drive for half an hour before finally stopping. But when they do, there’s a picnic set up with a bottle of wine over looking the ocean. The sky is pink and purple, and he didn’t time it like that, so it’s perfect.

When he looks at her and sees her face, he realizes he’d do anything to make her this happy.

036. Her lips wrap around a strawberry and she sighs, closing her eyes before opening them to assess how many she has left. She catches him watching her and she looks at him, small smile on her face. “Yes, James?”

He shakes his head. “Nothin’. Just didn’t know you liked strawberries so much is all.”

“My mom used to have a small garden in the backyard. I’d make myself sick eating them off the vine. Sometimes when they were still green.” She eats another one, then presses a piece of fruit to his lips.

They’re her favorite for many reasons, now.

037. She’d been unsure until James promised not to make fun of her because he’d be just as gone as she was.

So, Juliet agrees to get high with him in their living room, smoking a couple of joints he’d taken off a student.

She’s lying on her stomach in the living room and turns her head to look at him. He’s sitting against the couch on the floor. “This carpet. Our carpet’s so soft. Did you notice that before?”

“Good carpet,” he agrees, lying beside her. When she moves closer she grins. “I’m stoned, LaFleur.”

He grins back. “Me too.”

038. They’re dead asleep when the alarms start going off and James bolts out of bed, throwing on jeans in record time and running out of the house. Juliet pulls on clothes and follows him out, her heart slamming. Before she can call his name, someone runs toward her and grabs her arms, guiding her toward one of the houses designated as a ‘safe place’ for the women and children.

She’s turning her head, straining to see him even as she runs, and their eyes catch for a split second before he’s off to help defend the barracks from the Hostiles.

039. He’s driving her crazy, mouth moving over one breast then the other, and she gasps his name. “It’s my birthday. I get to pick.”

James shakes his head, then moves down her stomach, tracing her naval with his tongue, then the crease of her thigh where it meets her torso. “Uh-uh. It’s your birthday so you get to lay back and enjoy.”

He’s driving her crazy, and she knows he knows it. His mouth moves to her thigh before leaving her skin altogether, moving his body over hers.

“Happy birthday, Juliet.”

She kisses him deeply, legs winding around his hips.

040. Juliet’s sitting at her work station, bright light on her, surrounded by parts of an engine. It’s silent, everyone else gone for the day, but she’s so engrossed in her work, she doesn’t hear footsteps until someone’s touching her shoulder and she jumps.

“Hey, Blondie. Just me,” James says, putting his hands up so she doesn’t sock him one.

“Jesus, James. You scared me.”

“What are you doin’ out here so late, anyway?”

“Fixing this damn engine.”

“It’s after seven.”

She sighs and rubs her face, streaking it with grease.

Reaching out, he takes her hand. “Let’s go, grease monkey.”

041. She moves against him slow and lazy, mapping his sides with her hands as their hips rock. It’s humid as hell outside, and inside their bedroom the air is sticky and heavy. Bending her head, Juliet lets her tongue glide down his neck, and when his head arches she follows the curve. He tastes like sweat and the jungle air and when he groans, she attaches her lips to the spot they’ve landed on.

His hands tangle in her hair and they’re both gone; all that she can do is pant against his throat. She’d never change a damn thing.

042. Her heart is slamming in her chest, lungs heaving for air. As she hides behind the door she curses herself. It’s the most obvious hiding spot, but it’s not like she has a lot of options. She hears him, walking down the hall in the dark and she closes her eyes tightly, holding her breath.

And then, suddenly, the door flies away from her and slams shut, and James is bracing his hands on either side of her.

“Juliet Burke, you’re under arrest,” he drawls.

She laughs, and he tosses her over his shoulder to drop her on the bed.

043. The whole of Dharmaville is gathered around at the new recruit party, and Horace uses the opportunity to make an announcement. Juliet’s holding onto James even though he looks like he’d rather be anywhere else.

“As you all know, Billy retired last month and Jim LaFleur has been our interim head of security. But today, I’m pleased to tell you all that he has accepted the full time position.”

Everyone claps and James nods, tensely shaking hands.

Juliet leans up and whispers against his ear. “I can’t wait to show you how proud I am.”

That gets him to relax.

044. His hands glide over her skin easily, aided by the water as she backs up against the shower wall. His mouth collects the water that’s pooled in the hollow of her collar bone, and he lifts her, guiding her legs around his waist.

Her fingers tangle in his hair as her body rocks against his, watching the water sluice across his back. “James…”

When she breathes out his name he looks up, struck by the look on her face. Blonde hair sticks to the curve of her neck and he kisses her, hands mapping rivulets of water on her skin.

045. Juliet’s standing in front of the mirror, hair gathered in one hand and draped over her shoulder. The scissors are within reach and she thinks about it, about cutting her hair short. It’s always been long, tumbling down her back, but maybe, she thinks, it’s time for a change.

Until James passes by and watches her, then moves to stand behind her and sweep her hair to the other side so he can bend to kiss her neck. She’d lose that; lose him running his fingers through her hair and down her back.

Turning, she kisses him, silently thanking him.

046. “I would win. I would so win,” she says taking a pull from wine bottle number two.

He takes it from her, stealing a kiss first. “I’m damn good at poker, Blondie.”

“But I got…” she stops, correcting herself. “I have unreadable faces. You can’t read them if I want.”

He doesn’t know if that makes sense, but he nods. “That’s right. You got a great poker face.”

Sitting up she gestures up the beach toward the trail. “Let’s go. I’ll play you right now.”

Instead of getting up, he moves so that he can pull her over him. “Later.”

047. Moving back up his body, Juliet hums, dragging her lips across his chest as she goes. Then, she kisses his chin before resting her head against him to listen to his heart pound. They’re both quiet for a long while before she finally speaks. “I love you.”

His hands feel like fire on her skin and she gasps when his fingers dip into her, mouth pressing against her neck as he bites and sucks gently. “Love you,” he rumbles against her as his hand moves, and she writhes against him, eyes closing. She loves this with him, more than anything.

048. She’s standing there, looking around the dining room, one candle lit in the middle of the table. “What’s this?” she asks curiously, toeing off her work boots before walking further inside.

James looks kind of nervous as he puts down two wine glasses. “You always come home and do the cookin’. I just thought…maybe for once I’d cook.”

Juliet’s quiet for a few more seconds before she looks at him. Her only hint of not being serious is the way her upper lip pulls. “Is this a statement because I burned dinner last night?”

He laughs, pulling her against him.

049. Tahiti, she’s decided, would be a horrible place to retire. "Did you hear me?"

"Yeah, yeah, Tahiti sucks," he smirks, hand drawing up her calf slowly. "This is just the pit stop. Ten years, we’ll have enough money to keep goin’. And it won’t be Tahiti for work. It’ll be Tahiti for passports and the airport."

Sitting up, she crawls over his body so that she can lie down on his chest. "I want snow. And a place that goes through the seasons."

James kisses her forehead, thinking about it. About the ring in his pocket. "Anywhere you want, Blondie."

050. When she gets the position as head of the motor pool, there’s a lot of fanfare surrounding the decision. First woman in charge, it made a statement when Horace picked her over a more tenured mechanic. As such, she’s been avoiding the groups of people trying to congratulate her, and instead bee lines for James when she sees him coming to pick her up.

Taking his hand as they walk toward home, he looks down at her, a grin tugging at his lips. “I’m proud of you, Blondie.”

Juliet smiles, pleased. His is the only praise she’s wanted all day.

051. Juliet is holding her ground, arms crossed over her chest. “No drinking tonight.”

“Why the hell not? We drink at every damn party.”

“Because last time you and Miles stole a Jeep.”

Miles interjects. “To be fair, we really thought we saw – “

Juliet interrupts this time. “I don’t sleep with you Miles. Save it.” She turns back to James. “So?”

“So what?” In any other circumstance, he would have just agreed outright. But he can tell by her glare that he ain’t got a choice. “Fine. No drinkin’.”

Miles barely makes it out alive after cracking an imaginary whip.

052. Juliet grabs his wrist just as he’s about to bring the razor to his cheek. “Don’t,” she says, hedging between him and the sink.

“Don’t shave?” He looks at her, amused and ready to listen. “Why the hell not?”

She bites at her bottom lip a little, hands moving up his bare chest. “One more day. I think it’s sexy.” She drags her hands over his cheeks. “I like the way it feels.”

Her words grab his full attention, and he bends down just enough to kiss her and drop the razor. “I’ll keep it as long as you want.”

053. He doesn’t even know how everyone found out about his birthday, but he’s taken to the rec center by Miles, and there’s everyone shouting surprise, someone handing him a beer. Later, as he slow dances with Juliet, he looks at her.

“You put this together?”

She smiles and nuzzles his neck. “Nope. I know you hate surprise parties. I may have asked Amy for advice on what to get you though.”

“So I have her to thank then.”

Juliet pulls him down and kisses him softly. “Happy Birthday, James.”

It’s the first time it really has been in a while.

054. He’s lying in a bed that’s too big for one person, listening to waves hit the beach. Problem is, Juliet’s not there, and he’s never gonna get to sleep. Tahiti is nice, and he’s worked his ass off getting the parts he needs to restock inventory, but he can’t sleep without her.

He thinks about how she gets right on top of him, uses her like a mattress, and he smiles a little before rolling onto his stomach. He misses her like crazy, more than he thought he would, and that’s how he knows. He’s a hundred percent in love.

055. The first thing he had to do was get Horace to give him an advance on his paycheck. That was easy enough – James isn’t going anywhere, not with Juliet still there. When he gets on the sub with a few hundred bucks in his pocket, he’s not leaving to go over security protocol with DHARMA officials.

He wanders all over Tahiti, looking for what he really wants. He can’t just order this out of a magazine. When he finally sees it though, simple and silver in a window, he knows it’s perfect. Now all he has to do is ask.

056. When Juliet hears banging from the porch, she walks into the house and finds James working on assembling a crib. “Something I should know about?”

He stops and looks over at her, shaking his head. “Gift for Amy, from Horace. He wanted it to be a surprise, so.”

“So you’re putting it together and…taking it over there?”

“Hell, I don’t know what the plan is,” he says as he watches her trail her fingers over the wood. And it hits him for a second, and he almost proposes on the spot.

But he saves it. The timing’s gotta be right.

057. Juliet kisses his neck softly. “Ice cream sounds so good. With syrup…” She nibbles up to his earlobe and tugs gently with her teeth. “Please, James?”

He really ain’t sure how he’s supposed to resist that, the way those big blue eyes are begging, and the way she takes her bottom lip between her teeth like she’s hopeful or something. “Yeah. You owe me, Blondie.”

Before he can leave the house, she pulls him into a deep kiss, biting down gently on his bottom lip. “I’ll let you put chocolate sauce wherever you want.”

He grins. “Be right back, then.”

058. Juliet presses her forehead against the shower wall, hoping her cries are muffled by the water. Outside the bathroom, down the hall in the living room, James is talking with Jack. She can’t imagine that anything good will come of it.

Her hand goes over her mouth, shoulders shaking. She’s scared, afraid of what’s going to happen to her. To them. Jack and Kate being back means the end of the contentment she’s had for three years. This has been home, her home, and they have no right.

When the bathroom door opens and closes she doesn’t move. Just cries.

059. The only place Juliet could think to put Kate was the damn motor pool with her, and as she gets ready for work (what’s the point, it’s all over anyway) she wonders what she’s supposed to say to the other woman.

Welcome back. I guess you can have James now.

We were just playing house.

What took you so long?

Tears threaten every step of the way across the barracks, and of course, Kate is already there. Taking a deep breath, Juliet plasters on a smile and looks right at the other woman.

“It’s good to see you again, Kate.”

060. She thought she was done with this.

But of course, she can’t be happy for too long. There’s always something to run away from. Always a threat. Something that wants to drag her down, and this time it’s taking away the happiness she’s been clinging to for the past three years.

Jack, Kate, and Daniel. It always comes in threes. The bad news, the omens that seal your fate.

Juliet already knows that everything is over. Instead of fighting, it’d be easier if James could accept it. What they had is done. She knew it when he called her ‘Freckles’.

061. When James turns around, he’s staring at her back, watching her walk away.

If I never meet you, then I’ll never have to lose you.

What the hell does that mean? It’s out of nowhere and she didn’t even give him the chance to disagree with her. He’s spent two years thinking she’s the best thing that ever happened to him, and she wants to blow up the island and erase it all?

He’s frustrated with the whole damn thing. And for just a second, he thinks that if she wants to erase them, he’d rather forget it all, too.

062. He loved her.

He told her when they were dancing at a party. His arms were around her waist and his mouth was against her ear. He smelled like DHARMA shampoo and sweat and rust, and he said he loved her for the first time. She took him home after that and told him that she loved him back.

She was telling him.

Over and over again she told him. She needed to hear it one more time from him after she walked away. That he forgave her. That he loved her. That it was okay.

But she let go.

063. When she falls, things are fast and slow at the same time.

She can see the small lights going by her head until she closes her eyes. Her mind has time to wonder about what will happen when she hits the ground. (Will she die?) And then everything stops except her thoughts. For the time she has left (seconds, minutes, eternity?) she’ll never forget the way he looked, the horror on his face, the desperation in his voice.

She promised once that she’d never leave him, and now, all that she can hear is his voice.

Don’t you leave me.

064. It occurs too late for Juliet that maybe her mother has always been the one completely backwards, and her dad just couldn’t take it anymore. All that she remembers from that summer is her father walking out and her mom seemingly broken. That’s enough for a kid, when your mom says she’s fine but she won’t get out of bed and your dad isn’t there. But she never saw it from the other side.

And when she finally realizes that maybe her mother’s views on love were completely wrong, Juliet’s in the bottom of a hole, screaming at a bomb.

065. The first thing that hits is the pain and she cries out in shock, hands moving to rest on whatever’s on top of her. Then, she realizes she isn’t dead but she is dying. Alone in the dark, unable to see. She passes out, thinking of James, thinking of yellow flowers and the sub. Breaking into the cafeteria for ice cream at two in the morning, sex under a waterfall. She sees his face in front of her, smiling softly, loving her, saying her name softly.

When she opens her eyes, she realizes he’s there, and she reaches up. “…James?”

066. All he’s trying to do is get the hell out of the airport.

He uses the name LaFleur, won’t talk, won’t say any damn thing, and finally they let him go. Surviving a plane crash, after all, ain’t a crime.

He finds a cheap motel and a bottle of whisky and goes to town. Ignoring the knocks on the door, the requests for interviews and the ringing phone. Eventually he moves on, away from the places the news keeps running the Ajira flight story.

He left her there. Without thinking, he left Juliet behind. But he can’t tell that story.

067. He’s slumped on the couch with a bottle of rum – her drink of choice, not his. But she’s not here in this dingy apartment in LA, so he drinks and drifts.

When he officially asked her on a date, she’d blushed and said yes. Since there wasn’t much to do in Dharmaville they’d disappeared to the rec room after hours and shot pool until they wound up on a couch making out like a couple of teenagers.

When James opens his eyes, still stuck in this shit hole of an apartment, he looks over, half expecting her to be there.

068. James basically hates Miles for dragging him out of his apartment. “You gotta live a little, man,” and James bit back that he had three good years of living and he don’t want whatever this place has to offer. But instead, he winds up at some dive bar with a dance floor, sitting in the corner drinking whiskey.

He remembers pushing her hair away from her face. Bending down to tell her he loved her like it was a secret, whispering it against her ear. He remembers her leading him out of the party.

He remembers too much about her.

069. She wanted to get him off the island.

When she knew there wouldn’t be anything else, when she was broken, she wanted to make sure he left.

(It’s too much, so he drinks.)

It worked. What worked? The bomb sure as hell didn’t do anyone any damn good. It worked. The last thing she ever wanted to tell him don’t mean a damn thing to him. He backs up a little further.

Kiss me, James.

He drinks so that he forgets the taste of blood on her lips.

But he’s stuck remembering. And he hates her for that.

He drinks.

070. It’s not fucking fair, the way he can go all day and be okay, but when he dreams she’s there.

“What are you doing?” she asks him softly. They’re in the jungle. They’re always in the jungle.

He doesn’t answer, just walks away from her, knows he’s dreaming and hates it. Because she looks real, sounds real, and he wants to hold her, wake up with her right there. He can’t though, so he leaves her behind and she never follows him.

When he wakes up the sobs are waiting, but he pushes them back and finds the whiskey instead.

071. This guy has asked her out three times already, and when Juliet sees him coming she turns her back and rolls her eyes a little. The last thing she wants to do is go on a date with some guy during finals week.

“Hey, Juliet. Can we talk?”

She’s not sure why she does, but she turns. “Okay, Jack. What?” There’s a barely suppressed amused smirk on her face.

“You don’t have to date me forever. Just come with me for coffee once. Give me a chance.”

He looks so earnest that she sighs. “Fine. One cup. And you’re paying.”

072. “Holy shit. Juliet.”

She doesn’t hear anything else after that, she knows what it means. It means positive. It means she’s pregnant. It means she’s twenty, and in college, and wants to be a doctor, and pregnant. She’s trying to remember why she didn’t use a condom with Jack however long ago, and all that accomplishes is her bursting into tears.

“Hey, Jules. It’s okay. It’ll be okay, I promise.”

Juliet wipes her hands over her face. “I can’t have a baby.”

“Yeah you can. I’ll be here for you.”

Juliet looks at her big sister and nods, swallowing hard.

073. Juliet’s watching Jack with a hand over her belly as she frowns a little. “Are you sure – “

“I know what I’m doing. It’s just a crib, relax.”

Lips pressing together in a line, she leans against the wall in their crappy one bedroom apartment. “I was just trying to help.”

He comes out from under it and looks at her apologetically. “I know. Sorry. But look, it’s done.”

Walking forward, Juliet bends to pick up one of the stuffed animals from the floor and places it in the crib, hand on the railing. It’s perfect.

“I love you, Jack.”

074.It hits her one day as she’s sitting in anatomy class. She’s pregnant. She’s seven months pregnant, due right during finals, and she has no money. She lives in student housing, she works at a bank part time, she doesn’t even have a place for the baby to sleep yet, and she’s still having him.
She has no money except for what her sister can give her because her dad’s not talking to her and she doesn’t want Jack’s money given to her out of sympathy and regret.

Juliet knows she should just suck it up. She’s having a baby.

075. She’s crying on the couch, upset that Jack walked out rather than talk. She’s too pregnant to chase him, due any day, and that makes her even more upset, her hands over her belly as she tries to calm herself down.

When the front door opens she immediately silences herself, listening to him come around to face her on the couch. Before she can say anything, he hands her a wild red rose imperfectly torn from the vines somewhere on campus.

“You didn’t deserve that. I’m sorry, Juliet.”

Things have to be perfect for the baby, so she forgives him.

076. Ten hours of labor, no epidural, and at three in the morning, Juliet’s holding the quietest baby she thinks she’s ever seen. There’s a blue cap pulled down on his head, and his hands are sort of framing his face. But he’s content, sleeping against her. And all that she can think is that her life will never be the same again.

She has a baby.

She made a life.

“I love you, David,” she breathes out, stroking his cheek with one finger before closing her eyes. She’s a mom, and she’s never been this terrified in her entire life.

077. She definitely wasn’t one of those women to not get stretch marks or swollen ankles or acne. Pregnancy had a thing against her, and even six weeks later she feels horrible and she can’t imagine any woman feeling good enough to be sexy six weeks after having a baby. Her breasts hurt and she’s exhausted, but Jack’s stroking her side like six is the magic number.

“I’m sorry, Jack. I can’t. I’m not…” She huffs out a breath even as he bends to kiss her.

“You’re beautiful. You know that.” He steps back though, somehow managing not to look disappointed.

078. “It’s okay, hand him to me. I have him,” Juliet says, holding out her arms for the baby. Jack places him there and she smiles, a hand over David’s belly. “Hi, buddy. Let’s get you all clean.”

They’re running behind, and rather than bathe the baby separately before heading to Jack’s parent’s, she has him and will give him back once he’s clean. She’s sidetracked though with how fascinated he seems to be by the water as she guides him under the warm gentle spray. He lets out a baby gasp, hands flailing just a bit, and she laughs softly.

079. “We have enough money for rent and electricity, but not cable if we pay the gas.”

Juliet sighs and shifts David in her arms. “We have to get him a highchair, Jack. I can’t keep feeding him in my lap.”

“Then we don’t worry about cable and we see if we can get minimum coverage on our car insurance.”

She’s not listening anymore, just wondering when the hell she started having to choose between cable and eating, and feeding her baby or feeding herself. Holding David closer, she closes her eyes, needing things to be different sooner rather than later.

080. “I didn’t do it, mama.”

Innocent blue eyes stare up at Juliet and she arches an eyebrow. “If you didn’t do it, who did?”

“Daddy did it.”

“Yeah? He’s not even here. So how did daddy do it?”

“He came home.”

“Maybe I should call daddy right now at work and tell him he’s in big trouble.”

“No!” David says, eying the phone.

Juliet sits on the floor and holds her hands out. “C’mere, buddy.”

He climbs into her lap.

“Did you do it?”

“Yeah.”

“Can you help me clean it up?”

He nods, and Juliet sighs, kissing his forehead.

081. “It’s okay, buddy,” Juliet says as she holds him in her lap. “You’re okay.”

“I falled down,” David whimpers, a fresh wave of tears starting.

“Oh, I know. I know. But we’re gonna take good care of you, okay? You can pick any color cast you want. What about blue?”

“Like your eyes are the color blue,” he sniffles, sinking back against her chest as the pain meds finally kick in.

“Yeah, baby,” she whispers. “Like your eyes are blue, too.” He falls asleep as Jack and the doctor discuss x-rays, and Juliet kisses the top of her son’s head.

082. Juliet watches David play, his jacket making him look bulky as he runs and laughs. His hair is turning darker now but it’s curly and his eyes are still bright blue. She loves him, her little boy. This kid that’s stolen her heart forever and runs around with it every day.

When he runs to her and tackles her legs she laughs, lifting him high in the air before bringing him back down again to kiss his face all over.

“How much do I love you, David?”

He grins at her. “More than all the water in the ocean, Mama.”

083. Juliet has no clue how to take care of a six year old on her own while she’s working on her residency. But there’ve been too many times when Jack completely lost it or went out and got drunk. Forgetting to pick up David from daycare? She may as well be doing it all on her own anyway. The only thing Jack contributes is money.

So when she tells him to just go and do whatever it is he wants to do, she sighs heavily when he cries as she gives back his engagement ring.

There isn’t a point, anymore.

084. Sometimes she cries, and sometimes she just sits, staring at the empty space in her closet from her bed. It’s not like she and Jack had been perfect. The divorce was a long time coming. It’s just that there’s a part of her life over now that she’s been hanging onto since she was nineteen.

Jack’s been with her through everything, he’s been the cause of unbelievable angst and overwhelming happiness. And now all of it, all of him is gone and she thought she’d feel free.

All she feels is alone. Like there’s a part of her missing, somehow.

085. “You know we can’t do this anymore, Jack,” Juliet says softly, rubbing her forehead as he cries.

“I didn’t think things were this bad.” One of his hands drags down his face as he clears his throat. “So you really want to do this? Make the separation a permanent thing?”

She nods. “I’m sorry. I just…I’m tired of fighting with you. I can’t do it anymore.”

“I tried,” he says, looking at her. “To be a good dad. A good husband. I tried, Juliet.”

She looks right at Jack, reaching out to take his hand and squeezing gently.

“I know.”

086. David’s looking at her like maybe he wants to hug her, but he just stands here, and Juliet’s struck by how grown up he is. Twelve, but so much wiser than she was then, or Jack she imagines.

“So…what now?”

The front door has closed on Jack getting the last of his things, and Juliet shrugs a little. “I don’t know. I’ve never done this before. But I guess it’s just me and you now, kid.”

He heads toward the stairs but turns back to look at her for a second. “Good.”

He disappears behind a door, and Juliet sighs.

087.“We have to go back.”

She stares at him, embarrassed for him and the scene he’s making.

“We have to go back, Juliet.”

“Jack, please stop,” she says quietly, walking toward him, pleading with him. “There’s no going back now. It’s done.”

“I love you. And I want to show you.”

“You’ve had thirteen years to try and show me, Jack. And you did. You tried. But this isn’t working. And you’re making a scene. You need to go home.”

He looks at her, so dejected that she almost loses her resolve. But he finally turns, disappearing down the hall.

088.“Jack, you’re drunk,” Juliet says very carefully, arms crossed over her chest as he stands in front of a cab in her driveway.

“I need another chance, Juliet. I can’t do this.”

“Coming here drunk is not the way to prove yourself to me. Please leave.”

She has a staring contest with him, taking in his scruff, the bags under his eyes. When he finally turns away to get in the cab, Juliet turns to go back inside, letting out a heavy breath. There’s a moment when she wants to invite him in, but she goes inside, locking the door.

089.Juliet watches a woman collapse on the street and goes to her without hesitating, checking for a pulse and starting chest compressions.

David stands to the side, watching his mother with wide eyes, not even blinking as people pass by, none of them stopping to help until a man finally calls 911 on his cell phone. And David realizes then, that his mom’s not just anyone. She’s saving someone’s life right there on the street.

When the woman is taken away by ambulance and Juliet starts to apologize for making them miss their movie, David hugs her.

“Love you, mom.”

090. It’s hard, working in the same hospital as her ex-husband, but Juliet’s making do. She can’t abandon all of her patients, and it’s never a good time to pick up and start over. Too many things have changed in the past few months. She needs her work, at least, to be stable.

When she runs into him at the elevator, the awkward tension could be cut with a knife, and she gives him a little smile that he returns before she sighs.

“Jack, we work together. We have a son. We can do this.”

This time, they both genuinely smile.

091. "If you say ‘it’s not you, it’s me’, I’ll hang up, Jack."

He laughs, which feels wildly inappropriate for the moment.

"Juliet, it’s both of us. It’s everything."

She’s quiet for a few seconds before speaking again. “At least we can say we tried. For David’s sake, anyway.” She attempts a smile, but it falters. "Can I ask something cliché?"

Jack listens, waiting.

"Did you ever love me?" The silence is heavy for a while. "You still there?"

He answers, finally. "Not the way you deserved to be."

It’s honest, and she tells him goodnight before hanging up the phone.

092. Juliet’s staring at a salary written on a piece of paper, and she blinks slowly. It’s more than she’s ever made in her life, and probably more than she’ll ever make at Saint Sebastian’s.

“I can’t. I’m sorry.”

The representative from Mittelos looks disappointed. “Doctor Shephard – “

“Carlson”.

“Doctor Carlson. You do understand what we’re offering you, here?”

“I do, Mr. Alpert. And thank you. But I can’t take my son away from his family. His school. I can’t accept.”

When he leaves and she’s alone with her thoughts, Juliet wonders if she’s turned down the job of a lifetime.

093. In the dim quiet of her office, a soda is placed on her desk, startling her out of her thoughts.

"Heard you saved some lives today."

Juliet’s smile is warm. "Thanks, Jack." She gets lost for a second, staring down at a file.

"You okay?"

"Her name is Sun. The patient. Does that..." She trails off, looking for the right words. "Does that name seem familiar?"

He shakes his head slowly. "Should it?"

She smiles ruefully and takes the soda, opening it. "Probably not. Thanks again."

He leaves and she sips from the can, wondering about the woman named Sun.

094. He’s putty in her hands when her mouth works up his jaw and her teeth nibble on his earlobe. When her hands move down his stomach he can’t even think of words to say, just breathes out her name as she slides over him, whispering his name softly. Then, there’s an incessant beeping, and she begs him to ignore it.

When he’s eyes open, James reaches over to switch off his alarm clock, groaning in protest. Sitting up, he thinks about the woman in his dreams. Her hair, the way she feels.

He just wishes he could remember her name.

095. She runs into him at the store, stopping just short of bowling him over. “Christ, I’m sorry,” she apologizes, then hurries on her way.

She stands behind him getting tickets for a movie, David next to her. He turns and she locks eyes with him for a second, remembering him from somewhere but not sure enough to say anything.

They pass each other in the hospital, Juliet leaving with David to get ready for the concert and she smiles. It’s the third time she’s seen him in a week she realizes, but the elevator doors close before she says anything.

096. “So you’re ditching me. For a chick?”

James is handing back tickets to the Lakers game and shakes his head a little. “You’ll get it one day soon, Enos.”

Miles just stares at him. “Seriously, you met her three days ago and you’re already giving up courtside tickets to the Lakers. You haven’t even told me who she is.”

“What can I say, Miles? She’s important to me. And her name is Juliet.”

With that, James turns to leave. Miles always was a damn good wingman. James just hopes he remembers everything soon, wondering what kind of cue it’ll take.

097. She takes his hand in the church, watching as everyone files out into the light and toward whatever’s waiting on the other side. She’d thought she’d be afraid but there’s no fear. Just joy at being with him again.

When they step through she blinks, then looks around and realizes they’re alone outside. No Kate and Jack, no Charlie or Claire.

“I think we’re supposed to live the way we wanted to now.” She says it and knows she’s right.

Leading them to his car, he drives with her back to her house, holding onto her with his free hand.

098. Juliet sits on her couch with James, pouring them more rum. “I had David when I was still in school. Jack…wanted to give me money. Prove something that way. David’s thirteen now, and he’s so…” She swallows softly, looking at James who’s looking back intently.

“He’s amazing.” She’s afraid he’ll go, that this is too much and not what he wants. Kids, sure, but not Jack’s. But instead of getting up he pulls her close, surprising her enough that she lets out a sob she didn’t realize she was holding in.

“I can’t wait to get to know him, then.”

099. “I’m cold. You do it,” she says, wrapping the sheet tightly around her shoulders.

“It’s your house, what if I run into the kid?”

“He’s asleep. Please?”

“Ain’t we all supposed to be sleepin’?”

“Down the hall, bottom cabinet. Blankets, please.”

With a sigh, James gets up and tosses on a pair of boxers before disappearing out of the room and into the hallway. And sure enough, there’s David, at that same cabinet getting a blanket of his own ‘cause it’s actually cold outside for once.

They don’t say anything to each other, but James feels like an intruder nonetheless.

100. Where they are doesn’t matter anymore, though she does make out one of her summer hats hanging on a peg behind the door, so she figures they made it to her place. She’s too busy kissing him, his hands pushing at her white coat, hers tugging off his leather jacket. It’s him and she’s home, and all that she wants is to forget and remember everything at the same time with him.

When they’re both naked, lying in her bed and re-discovering, she whispers softly. “James. I love you.”

He smiles, dimples ever present.

“Well, Blondie. I love you back.”

A Public Service Announcement.

2011-11-07T04:43:24Z

If you have friended me, and I haven't friended you back, the reasons are as follows:

1) You're only in it for the fic (which is fine!)

2) There was a friending meme and ton of friending was going on so there was an over-sight and I was supposed to friend you back, I just never did. (I'm sorry, just tell me!)

3) You think I'm a mind reader and when you friend me you think I'll somehow KNOW, then magically add you back.

4) You're just a creeper.

If it's the last two, either comment and tell me you actually wanted me to add you back or know that I never will.

I know this won't get rid of the bot journals and such, but I always wonder what the hell happened when people unfriend me that I didn't even know.

School's in bitches.

2011-11-04T21:48:03Z

Classes I would take if they were taught by these people:

Notes
1) Battlestar Galactica screen caps are so shitty, everywhere. I know why, it's just. UGH. This is why I never use this show for anything.
2) Though that isn't an excuse, my graphic work is just horrible.
3) As evidenced by the fact that somehow my picspam for The Doctor is smaller than all the others. No clue how that even happened, so.

my otp

2011-10-29T23:29:31Z

I would like to thank whomever came up with this idea for a challenge at tvrealm, since it let me bask in the glory that is my crossover ship - John McClane and Erica Evans. Seriously you guys, I ship it so hard. It happened when I happened to watch Live Free or Die Hard after an episode of V. And then it happened again in my role play. And now it's like this thing I can never un-see. I love it so much.

Also:

I wish I was good enough to make icon manips, but alas, I am not. Nor will I ever be. I shall have to get by with crappy picspams.

a fic i wrote at work, trololo

2011-10-20T16:01:50Z

Title: Promises
Author: propernice
Rating: G (I'M SO VANILLA LATELY.)
Fandom: LOST
Pairing: Suliet
A/N: Another fic for ciaimpala! For the prompt 'Domesticity' Um, only this time, I don't know what this is, really, and I don't have a beta, and this may be the most...okay I don't know. I'll let everyone else decide. It's just really random, and I realized other than a lot of smut after 'The End', I never wrote anything about later events. So. Here it is. Comments, please.

Juliet looks at James over a box marked 'old files' and has no idea why she's wound so tightly over this. But here he is, in her house, and she laughs softly to herself, pressing the heel of her hands against her eyes.

"What?" he asks, not moving from where he's been watching her right back.

"Nothing, I just...this is..." she pauses and looks at him again. "You remember when you moved in with me the first time?"

"Don't think we did a whole lot of unpackin' that night," he says with a little grin as he sidesteps the boxes to stand in front of her, hand resting on her hip.

"No, we didn't. But you know...I have a kid asleep upstairs." She looks up at him, holding his eyes, waiting for a hurt look that never comes. Surprised when it doesn't. "We haven't talked about that."

James doesn't move. "What? About you marryin' the Doc when you were pregnant?" He pulls away and runs a hand through his hair, looking at her over his shoulder before going to remove the tape from one of the boxes. "Ain't like we all knew each other, Blondie."

She has no idea where her dread is coming from, if James (of all people on the subject of Jack) is fine. It's just fast and sudden, and he was so mad at Jack before she died. Her eyes close, forehead creasing again at the memory that's suddenly so sharp she hurts again. Before she can shake herself out of it, James is there with his hands on her shoulders.

"I died," she says quietly.

"Guess I did, too."

"And instead of...wherever, we just lived lives again."

"And you had a kid. With Jack."

"Not on purpose," she clarifies, and they both laugh a little even as she glances up at the stairs to make sure David isn't eavesdropping. But the smile doesn't stay long as she looks back at James. "Is this real? Is it...is this really our lives now or does something happen next?"

He shrugs a shoulder, fingers playing with a piece of her hair. "No clue. I just know that none of the other stuff matters anymore."

He's taking everything so well, he's so calm, and she still feels like the other shoe is going to drop any second. She hates it.

"After everything, I just feel like we deserve to have this and for it to be right. And you're so damn relaxed that I feel like I'm missing out on something." She says it all in a rush of air and she can't look up at him.

His fingers move under her chin, and he strokes the curve of her jaw before his hand moves through her hair.

"We're gonna be okay, Blondie. You just gotta believe that. I ain't goin' anywhere. Neither are you. We're here. This is it."

When she looks up at him, his thumb brushes an errant tear off of her cheek.

"It'll be okay," she repeats, needing to believe that with every fiber of her being.

He told her once that he didn't like promising things, that the burden of breaking them was too heavy. But now, his lips brush over hers and his words make her relax for the first time in days.

"I promise."

for tvrealm

2011-10-19T03:43:25Z

The Walking Dead picspam!

Okay I promise, no more posts until tomorrow when I talk about fandom and characters from that meme.

fic.

2011-10-15T04:01:13Z

Title: Exercises in Accepting Fact
Author: propernice
Fandom: LOST
Ship: Suliet
Rating: PG
Prompt: Reunion
A/N: So, this five acts meme is going around, and after looking at all the prompts, ciaimpala's list struck me. Mine doesn't fit the rules, because I can't be tamed like that. I hope people who enjoy Suliet will find their way back to this post. I stopped before smut because I DIDN'T KNOW IF IT WAS APPROPRIATE FOR THIS MEME. Comments are ♥ though, and maybe I'll write some sexy times later.

She hasn’t seen him for five days. A simple, supposed to be easy meeting with Richard has turned into five days of Juliet wondering where the hell James is, if he’s safe, if he’s dead, and wondering when the hell she started caring like this. It’s been eleven months since her two weeks were up, and three weeks since she started sleeping with him, and they were both pretty positive it was a onetime thing, then a weekend thing, and then ‘there’s nothing else to do, so why the hell not?’ thing.

Only at some point in that three weeks she’s stopped sleeping well at night when he’s not there, and she wonders if he’s just fine or if he tosses and turns like she does.

Son of a bitch.

Considering her track record, she’s doing a shitty job of not getting attached again like she’d promised herself after Goodwin. Well, after Jack. No, after Goodwin, for sure. Jack was just…Jack, and she’d rather not think about it.

For the fifth day she’s pacing her porch, one arm crossed over her stomach and the other dragging along the railing as she stares hard out into the tree line, like maybe she’ll see him first. She went to work the first three days, but the last two she’s been such a fucking mess that her boss told her to just stay home. Which, when had she ever imagined herself doing that? Sitting at home worrying about James?

When the sun sets and he’s still not back, Juliet’s had about as much as she can take, and she’s about to march to Horace’s place herself when suddenly the flood lights kick on and people are rushing toward the trees with rifles raised.

“Calm down, boys. Hell, you forget what I look like?”

From where she is he looks fine, but he’s still far away. She’s not moving, just staring, and she watches as Horace approaches James first. She sees the handshake and then a sort of awkward hug before he looks like he’s scanning for someone until his eyes land on her. She’s at least sixty yards away but it feels like it’s just them for a split second, before everyone mills around him again

She figures he’s safe now, so she goes inside. Closes her door and sits on the couch with her elbows on her knees. It’s a full hour before she hears him clomping up her porch and he knocks even as she’s calling for him to come in. Getting up she stands right there, right in front of the couch, waiting. When he comes around the entry way, he looks toward the kitchen first before seeing her in the living room.

There’s no blood, no bruises, and she lets out a breath she hadn’t realized she was holding. “Where the hell were you?” It sounds harsher in her ears than she meant for it to, and she closes her eyes, regrouping before she speaks again. But when she opens her eyes he’s suddenly standing right in front of her and she’s staring at a spot on his khaki jumpsuit.

“Horace wouldn’t let me tell anyone what was goin’ on. Had to make sure this meetin’ went off without any surprises.”

“You could have told me,” she protests, looking up at him, knowing it’s not fair. That after all the lies he’s had to tell to get to this point, the least he can give to Horace now is his word.

“So, you’re mad?” James asks; still close enough to touch, but neither one of them moving.

“I was worried about you.” When she finally looks up at him her eyes are honest and blue, and he can’t help but bend down and kiss her, one hand stroking through her hair.

“You’re definitely a sight for sore eyes,” he says against her mouth. “I missed you.”

There’s no talking for a second – she’s too busy chasing his tongue with hers, and biting at his bottom lip, and pressing her hips right against his. But finally she breaks away long enough to let him kiss her neck so that she can talk. “Missed me, huh?” Her last words come out as a soft gasp, his fingers sliding under her shirt. “Prove it,” she challenges him.

His grin is quick as a flash then gone before he hoists her over his shoulder and carries her to the bedroom.

Elizabeth Mitchell Spam - for tvrealm

2011-09-24T20:31:35Z

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