{"id":8252,"date":"2024-12-28T20:21:55","date_gmt":"2024-12-28T20:21:55","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/prongo.com\/?p=8252"},"modified":"2024-12-31T00:00:12","modified_gmt":"2024-12-31T00:00:12","slug":"dad-jokes","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/prongo.com\/dad-jokes\/","title":{"rendered":"Dad Jokes"},"content":{"rendered":"\n<figure class=\"wp-block-image size-large is-style-default\"><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" width=\"1200\" height=\"675\" src=\"https:\/\/prongo.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2024\/12\/tomato-paste-1200x675.webp\" alt=\"\" class=\"wp-image-9129\" srcset=\"https:\/\/prongo.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2024\/12\/tomato-paste-1200x675.webp 1200w, https:\/\/prongo.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2024\/12\/tomato-paste-400x225.webp 400w, https:\/\/prongo.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2024\/12\/tomato-paste-768x432.webp 768w, https:\/\/prongo.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2024\/12\/tomato-paste-370x208.webp 370w, https:\/\/prongo.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2024\/12\/tomato-paste-270x152.webp 270w, https:\/\/prongo.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2024\/12\/tomato-paste-570x321.webp 570w, https:\/\/prongo.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2024\/12\/tomato-paste-740x416.webp 740w, https:\/\/prongo.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2024\/12\/tomato-paste.webp 1280w\" sizes=\"auto, (max-width: 1200px) 100vw, 1200px\" \/><\/figure>\n\n\n\n<ul class=\"wp-block-list\">\n<li class=\"has-medium-font-size\">Why did the stadium get hot after the game? All the fans left.<\/li>\n\n\n\n<li class=\"has-medium-font-size\">Why don&#8217;t some fish play piano? Because you can&#8217;t tuna fish.<\/li>\n\n\n\n<li class=\"has-medium-font-size\">What do you get when you cross an elephant and a rhino? Elephino (pronounced &#8220;I&#8217;ll-eh-fi-no&#8221;).<\/li>\n\n\n\n<li class=\"has-medium-font-size\">Why was the big cat disqualified from the race? Because it was a cheetah.<\/li>\n\n\n\n<li class=\"has-medium-font-size\">Why did the scarecrow become a neurosurgeon? He was outstanding in his field.<\/li>\n\n\n\n<li class=\"has-medium-font-size\">How do you make a handkerchief dance? Put a little boogie in it.<\/li>\n\n\n\n<li class=\"has-medium-font-size\">Why did the man put his money in the blender? He wanted to make some liquid assets.<\/li>\n\n\n\n<li class=\"has-medium-font-size\">What did the ocean say to the shore? Nothing, it just waved.<\/li>\n\n\n\n<li class=\"has-medium-font-size\">Why don&#8217;t crabs give to charity? Because they&#8217;re shellfish.<\/li>\n\n\n\n<li class=\"has-medium-font-size\">Why was the baby strawberry crying? Because her parents were in a jam.<\/li>\n\n\n\n<li class=\"has-medium-font-size\">How do you fix a broken tomato? With tomato paste.<\/li>\n\n\n\n<li class=\"has-medium-font-size\">What do you call an alligator in a vest? An investigator.<\/li>\n\n\n\n<li class=\"has-medium-font-size\">How does the moon cut his hair? Eclipse it.<\/li>\n\n\n\n<li class=\"has-medium-font-size\">What do you call a dog that can do magic? A labracadabrador.<\/li>\n\n\n\n<li class=\"has-medium-font-size\">Why did the picture go to jail? Because it was framed.<\/li>\n\n\n\n<li class=\"has-medium-font-size\">Why don&#8217;t some people trust stairs? They&#8217;re always up to something.<\/li>\n\n\n\n<li class=\"has-medium-font-size\">What do you call an apology written in dots and dashes? Re-morse code.<\/li>\n\n\n\n<li class=\"has-medium-font-size\">Why was the math book unhappy? It had too many problems.<\/li>\n\n\n\n<li class=\"has-medium-font-size\">What did the duck say when it bought lipstick? Put it on my bill.<\/li>\n\n\n\n<li class=\"has-medium-font-size\">Why don&#8217;t you play hide and seek with mountains? Because they peak.<\/li>\n\n\n\n<li class=\"has-medium-font-size\">What kind of tree fits in your hand? A palm tree.<\/li>\n\n\n\n<li class=\"has-medium-font-size\">Why don&#8217;t you give Elsa a balloon? Because she will let it go.<\/li>\n\n\n\n<li class=\"has-medium-font-size\">How do you organize a space party? You planet.<\/li>\n\n\n\n<li class=\"has-medium-font-size\">What did one ocean say to the other ocean? Nothing, they just waved.<\/li>\n\n\n\n<li class=\"has-medium-font-size\">What do you call a pile of cats? A meowtain.<\/li>\n\n\n\n<li class=\"has-medium-font-size\">Why don&#8217;t some people eat clocks? It&#8217;s too time-consuming.<\/li>\n\n\n\n<li class=\"has-medium-font-size\">How do you catch a unique rabbit? Unique up on it.<\/li>\n\n\n\n<li class=\"has-medium-font-size\">How do you catch a tame rabbit? Tame way, unique up on it.<\/li>\n\n\n\n<li class=\"has-medium-font-size\">Why did the golfer bring extra pants? In case he got a hole in one.<\/li>\n\n\n\n<li class=\"has-medium-font-size\">What do you call a bee that can&#8217;t make up its mind? A maybe.<\/li>\n\n\n\n<li class=\"has-medium-font-size\">How do you make a tissue dance? Put a little boogie in it.<\/li>\n\n\n\n<li class=\"has-medium-font-size\">What did one hat say to the other? Stay here, I&#8217;m going on ahead.<\/li>\n\n\n\n<li class=\"has-medium-font-size\">Why did the scarecrow get promoted? Because he was outstanding in his field.<\/li>\n\n\n\n<li class=\"has-medium-font-size\">How does a penguin build its house? Igloos it together.<\/li>\n\n\n\n<li class=\"has-medium-font-size\">Why don&#8217;t scientists trust atoms? Because they make up everything.<\/li>\n\n\n\n<li class=\"has-medium-font-size\">What did the grape do when he got stepped on? Nothing but let out a little wine!<\/li>\n\n\n\n<li class=\"has-medium-font-size\">How does a vampire start a letter? Tomb it may concern.<\/li>\n\n\n\n<li class=\"has-medium-font-size\">Why don&#8217;t eggs tell jokes? They&#8217;d crack each other up.<\/li>\n\n\n\n<li class=\"has-medium-font-size\">What do you call fake spaghetti? An impasta.<\/li>\n\n\n\n<li class=\"has-medium-font-size\">How does a snowman get around? By riding an &#8220;icicle.&#8221;<\/li>\n\n\n\n<li class=\"has-medium-font-size\">What did the janitor say when he jumped out of the closet? Supplies!<\/li>\n\n\n\n<li class=\"has-medium-font-size\">How do you make holy water? You boil the hell out of it.<\/li>\n\n\n\n<li class=\"has-medium-font-size\">Why did the tomato turn red? Because it saw the salad dressing.<\/li>\n\n\n\n<li class=\"has-medium-font-size\">Why don&#8217;t some couples go to the gym? Because some relationships don&#8217;t work out.<\/li>\n\n\n\n<li class=\"has-medium-font-size\">How do you catch a squirrel? Climb a tree and act like a nut.<\/li>\n\n\n\n<li class=\"has-medium-font-size\">What do you call a belt made of watches? A waist of time.<\/li>\n\n\n\n<li class=\"has-medium-font-size\">Why can&#8217;t you hear a pterodactyl go to the bathroom? Because the &#8220;P&#8221; is silent.<\/li>\n\n\n\n<li class=\"has-medium-font-size\">Why was the broom late? It swept in.<\/li>\n\n\n\n<li class=\"has-medium-font-size\">How do you find Will Smith in the snow? You look for fresh prints.<\/li>\n\n\n\n<li class=\"has-medium-font-size\">Why did the invisible man turn down the job offer? He couldn&#8217;t see himself doing it.<\/li>\n\n\n\n<li class=\"has-medium-font-size\">What do you call a cow with no legs? Ground beef.<\/li>\n\n\n\n<li class=\"has-medium-font-size\">How do you throw a space party? You planet.<\/li>\n\n\n\n<li class=\"has-medium-font-size\">What do you call a pile of cats? A meowtain.<\/li>\n\n\n\n<li class=\"has-medium-font-size\">How do you make a lemon drop? Just let it fall.<\/li>\n\n\n\n<li class=\"has-medium-font-size\">Why don&#8217;t you play poker in the jungle? Too many cheetahs.<\/li>\n\n\n\n<li class=\"has-medium-font-size\">What do you call a factory that makes good products? A satisfactory.<\/li>\n\n\n\n<li class=\"has-medium-font-size\">How do you organize a space party? You planet.<\/li>\n\n\n\n<li class=\"has-medium-font-size\">Why did the bicycle fall over? Because it was two-tired.<\/li>\n\n\n\n<li class=\"has-medium-font-size\">How does the ocean say hi? It waves.<\/li>\n\n\n\n<li class=\"has-medium-font-size\">What kind of shoes do ninjas wear? Sneakers.<\/li>\n\n\n\n<li class=\"has-medium-font-size\">Why was the computer cold? It left its Windows open.<\/li>\n\n\n\n<li class=\"has-medium-font-size\">What do you call a magic dog? A labracadabrador.<\/li>\n\n\n\n<li class=\"has-medium-font-size\">Why did the banana go to the doctor? Because it wasn&#8217;t peeling well.<\/li>\n\n\n\n<li class=\"has-medium-font-size\">How does a scientist freshen her breath? With experi-mints.<\/li>\n\n\n\n<li class=\"has-medium-font-size\">What kind of key opens a banana? A monkey.<\/li>\n\n\n\n<li class=\"has-medium-font-size\">How do you organize a space party? You planet.<\/li>\n\n\n\n<li class=\"has-medium-font-size\">What do you call a pile of cats? A meowtain.<\/li>\n\n\n\n<li class=\"has-medium-font-size\">Why don&#8217;t you give Elsa a balloon? Because she will let it go.<\/li>\n\n\n\n<li class=\"has-medium-font-size\">Why don&#8217;t some people eat clocks? It&#8217;s too time-consuming.<\/li>\n\n\n\n<li class=\"has-medium-font-size\">What did the ocean say to the beach? Nothing, it just waved.<\/li>\n\n\n\n<li class=\"has-medium-font-size\">How do you organize a space party? You planet.<\/li>\n\n\n\n<li class=\"has-medium-font-size\">What do you call a pile of cats? A meowtain.<\/li>\n\n\n\n<li class=\"has-medium-font-size\">How do you make holy water? You boil the hell out of it.<\/li>\n\n\n\n<li class=\"has-medium-font-size\">Why did the scarecrow win an award? Because he was outstanding in his field.<\/li>\n\n\n\n<li class=\"has-medium-font-size\">How does a penguin build its house? Igloos it together.<\/li>\n\n\n\n<li class=\"has-medium-font-size\">Why don&#8217;t scientists trust atoms? Because they make up everything.<\/li>\n\n\n\n<li class=\"has-medium-font-size\">What do you call cheese that isn&#8217;t yours? Nacho cheese.<\/li>\n\n\n\n<li class=\"has-medium-font-size\">How do you make a tissue dance? Put a little boogie in it.<\/li>\n\n\n\n<li class=\"has-medium-font-size\">What did one wall say to the other? I&#8217;ll meet you at the corner.<\/li>\n\n\n\n<li class=\"has-medium-font-size\">Why did the golfer bring an extra pair of socks? In case he got a hole in one.<\/li>\n\n\n\n<li class=\"has-medium-font-size\">Why did the coffee file a police report? It got mugged.<\/li>\n\n\n\n<li class=\"has-medium-font-size\">How does a snowman get around? By riding an &#8220;icicle.&#8221;<\/li>\n\n\n\n<li class=\"has-medium-font-size\">What do you call a fish with no eyes? Fsh.<\/li>\n\n\n\n<li class=\"has-medium-font-size\">How does a dog stop a video? It presses the &#8220;paws&#8221; button.<br><\/li>\n\n\n\n<li class=\"has-medium-font-size\">What did the grape do when he got stepped on? Nothing but let out a little wine!<\/li>\n\n\n\n<li class=\"has-medium-font-size\">How do you find Will Smith in the snow? You look for fresh prints.<\/li>\n\n\n\n<li class=\"has-medium-font-size\">What did the janitor say when he jumped out of the closet? Supplies!<\/li>\n\n\n\n<li class=\"has-medium-font-size\">Why don&#8217;t some couples go to the gym? Because some relationships don&#8217;t work out.<\/li>\n\n\n\n<li class=\"has-medium-font-size\">Why don&#8217;t oysters donate to charity? Because they are shellfish.<\/li>\n\n\n\n<li class=\"has-medium-font-size\">How do you make a lemon drop? Just let it fall.<\/li>\n\n\n\n<li class=\"has-medium-font-size\">Why don&#8217;t you play hide and seek with mountains? Because they peak.<\/li>\n\n\n\n<li class=\"has-medium-font-size\">What kind of tree fits in your hand? A palm tree.<\/li>\n\n\n\n<li class=\"has-medium-font-size\">How does the moon cut his hair? Eclipse it.<\/li>\n\n\n\n<li class=\"has-medium-font-size\">Why did the picture go to jail? Because it was framed.<\/li>\n\n\n\n<li class=\"has-medium-font-size\">What did the duck say when it bought lipstick? Put it on my bill.<\/li>\n\n\n\n<li class=\"has-medium-font-size\">How does a scientist freshen her breath? With experi-mints.<\/li>\n\n\n\n<li class=\"has-medium-font-size\">Why did the golfer bring extra pants? In case he got a hole in one.<\/li>\n\n\n\n<li class=\"has-medium-font-size\">How does a penguin build its house? Igloos it together.<\/li>\n\n\n\n<li class=\"has-medium-font-size\">What do you call fake spaghetti? An impasta.<\/li>\n\n\n\n<li class=\"has-medium-font-size\">Why did the invisible man turn down the job offer? He couldn&#8217;t see himself doing it.<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":9129,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_themeisle_gutenberg_block_has_review":false,"footnotes":""},"categories":[41,129],"tags":[325,78],"class_list":["post-8252","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-kid-jokes","category-kids-jokes","tag-dad-jokes","tag-funny-jokes"],"views":1,"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/prongo.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/8252","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/prongo.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/prongo.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/prongo.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/prongo.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=8252"}],"version-history":[{"count":3,"href":"https:\/\/prongo.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/8252\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":9130,"href":"https:\/\/prongo.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/8252\/revisions\/9130"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/prongo.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/9129"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/prongo.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=8252"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/prongo.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=8252"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/prongo.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=8252"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}