urn:lj:livejournal.com:atom1:procrasturbates Danny Danny 2010-02-02T04:12:50Z urn:lj:livejournal.com:atom1:procrasturbates:28905 2009-05-18T03:30:25Z 2010-02-02T04:12:50Z (10:23:51 PM) Setine: if i wasn't like 6'3 in all the shoes i want<br />(10:23:56 PM) Setine: i would have a million of them<br />(10:24:03 PM) Setine: i once got a GUESS purse for thirty bucks<br />(10:24:13 PM) Me: is 6'3 the size? <br />(10:24:19 PM) Setine: ...<br />(10:24:21 PM) Setine: height.<br />(10:24:21 PM) Tif: ...6'3" is her height in high heels.<br />(10:24:22 PM) Suki: ...<br /><br />I swear to God I am the dumbest person alive. urn:lj:livejournal.com:atom1:procrasturbates:16060 2009-04-12T01:21:40Z 2010-02-01T11:38:20Z Shakira - Wherever, Whenever. Connecting to server...<br />Looking for someone you can chat with. Hang on.<br />You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!<br />Stranger: WASSSSSSSSSSSSUP<br />You: HI!<br />Stranger: OMG WHO ARE YOU<br />You: I'M SUPERMAN.<br />Stranger: HOLY HELL. OMG. YOU SAVED MY LIFE ONE TIME.<br />You: DID I? I DON'T EVEN REMEMBER MAN.<br />Stranger: FUCK YES. OMG AND I NEVER GET TO THANK YOU. I'M PRETTY SURE YOU WERE ROLLING OR SOMETHING.<br />You: OH MY GOD. THIS IS SO INSANE, I NEVER RUN INTO THESE PEOPLE AGAIN. AWKWARD...<br />Stranger: THAT'S OKAY. SOME DUDE WAS TRYING TO TAKE MY MONEY. YOU ROCK HARD.<br />Stranger: I'M SO HAPPY I GET TO TALK TO YOU AGAIN.<br />You: I TRY MAN, I TRY.<br />You: AWW, I'M FLATTERED!<br />Stranger: (YOU ARE PRETTY FOXY, BTW.)<br />You: (YOU TOO LMAO.)<br />Stranger: HELL YEAH. DO YOU REMEMBER ME? I WAS THAT HOT CHICK WITH THE LONG RED HAIR AND KILLER ASS.<br />You: ...OH YEAH. NOW I REMEMBER.<br />You: NOT THAT I WAS LOOKING!!!!<br />Stranger: PSH THAT'S OKAY MAN. I'M SURE BEING SUPERMAN....I MEAN, SOME GIRLS WOULD BE A LITTLE INTIMIDATED.<br />Stranger: BANGING SUPERMAN. THAT'S QUITE AN ACHIEVEMENT. IT'D BE A PEAK IN MOST ANYBODY'S LIFE MAN.<br />You: YEAH MAN, SOMETIMES. I DON'T REALLY GO TO BARS TO GET ASS, EITHER. THAT WAS A RUMOR.<br />Stranger: SHIT MAN I KNEW THAT. I TRUST YOU.<br />You: OH YEAH, IT'S HARD. AM I A BIRD, AM I A PLANE? NAW, I'M FUCKING SUPERMAN!!!!1<br />Stranger: YOU THE BOMB MAN.<br />You: MY LIFE IS SO HARD!<br />You: THANK YOU SWEET THANG.<br />Stranger: AND I BET IT'S TOUGH, WITH ALL THOSE BIG, STRONG MUSCLES.<br />Stranger: HIDING YOUR ~SUPERPOWERS~<br />You: THEY GET IN THE WAY SOMETIMES, BEING SO HARD AND THROBBING.<br />Stranger: HELL YEAH. CHRIST. I'D TAP THAT, THOUGH.<br />Stranger: YOU KNOW WHAT I'M SAYIN'<br />You: OH THANK YOU. I WOULD, TOO. ACTUALLY, I TRIED ONCE...DIDN;T END WELL. I KIND OF--BUT YEAH, ANYWAY. I MEAN, I WOULDN'T SAY NO, IF YOU KNOW WHAT I MEAN.<br />Stranger: BUT DAMN. YOU KNOW THOSE LONG-DISTANCE RELATIONSHIPS. AND YOU PROBABLY WOULDN'T HAVE A LOT OF TIME....UNLESS YOU'RE LIKE, A TWO-PUMP CHUMP.<br />Stranger: WHICH IS TOTALLY COOL IF YOU ARE.<br />Stranger: I STILL LOVE YOU.<br />You: I'M SUPERMAN, I MAKE TIME FOR PEOPLE IN NEED. IF YOU'RE IN NEED OF WHAT I THINK YOU'RE SAYING YOU'RE IN NEED OF, I'M SAVING YOUR LIFE. IF YOU KNOW WHAT I MEAN.<br />Stranger: I'M IN NEED OF THE GREATEST NEED ;)<br />You: I'LL BE THERE!!!<br />Stranger: REMEMBER WHERE YOU SAVED ME? ACROSS THE STREET FROM BRYANT PARK, AT THE STARBUCKS?<br />Stranger: IN NEW YORK?<br />You: YES I DO.<br />You: LOOKING BACK ON IT NOW, I THINK THIS IS FATE. YOUR ASS LOOKED LOVELY--HOW IS YOUR ASS?<br />Stranger: BE THERE. TEN O'CLOCK. TOMORROW NIGHT.<br />You: OHH BABY.<br />Stranger: MY ASS IS DOING AWESOME.<br />You: I'LL BE THERE ON TIME TO RESCUE YOU!!!<br />You: OH SWEET!<br />Stranger: IT'S FEELING VERY LOVED AND IMPACIENT RIGHT NOW.<br />Stranger: AND I MAY BE EARLY, MAN.<br />You: IT WILL BE FEELING MY THROBBING MANHOOD SOON ENOUGH.<br />Stranger: OOH LA LA. CAN YOU FLY ME TO PARIS?<br />You: I CERTAINLY CAN!!!!<br />Stranger: GOOD. MY ASS SAYS HI.<br />You: TELL IT I STILL LOVE IT!<br />Stranger: IT SAYS YOU'LL HAVE TO PROVE THAT TOMORROW.<br />You: TELL IT "IT'S ON"!!!!<br />Stranger: OH BUT IT'S A LITTLE GUILTY-FEELING, TOO.<br />Stranger: BECAUSE I HAVE A BOYFRIEND.<br />Stranger: IS THIS OKAY?<br />You: IT'S OKAY, HE CAN BE THE BAD GUY. GIVES ME A REASON TO KILL THE FUCKER.....<br />Stranger: BUT MY BOYFRIEND'S MADE OF KRYPTONITE. WHAT WILL YOU DO?<br />You: ...FUCK SHIT DICK.<br />You: FUCK MY FUCKING LIFE.<br />Stranger: I'M SO SORRY<br />Stranger: WE MIGHT BE ABLE TO PULL IT OFF THOUGH.<br />Stranger: MY ASS IS VERY TORN RIGHT NOW.<br />You: FUCK I'LL TRY FOR THAT ASS!!! BUT FUCK MY GODDAMN LIFE, WHAT THE SHIT IS THIS FUCKING CRAP!!!!!!!!<br />You: IT WILL BE MORE TORN WHEN I SEE IT TOMORROW!!!<br />Stranger: I DON'T KNOW BABY! AND MAN, DON'T TEMPT ME. <br />Stranger: I'M GOING TO DO MY BEST.<br />You: MY COCK'S AS TIGHT AND JUICY AS MY MUSCLES BABY.<br />Stranger: MY POOR ASS =(<br />Stranger: SO SAD RIGHT NOW<br />You: I'LL CHEER IT UP!!!!<br />Stranger: OMG MY BOYFRIEND JUST WALKED IN. WE HAVE TO KEEP THIS AFFAIR ON THE D-L.<br />Stranger: TEN O'CLOCK. REMEMBER.<br />You: I'LL NEVER FORGET BABY.<br />Stranger: NEVER!!!!<br />Your conversational partner has disconnected.