fic: should,could, would

When Leeteuk sees promotional pictures of SNSD, his eyes linger just a bit longer on Sooyoung. He doesn’t know why though, it’s not like he likes her in a more than friendly way. She’s nice and funny enough, but he has a set ideal for a girl , and it was a combination of Yoona and Seohyun. Sooyoung was a far cry from the two, or maybe she wasn’t, he thinks and he just didn’t notice it. But yeah, his eyes easily bypass Seohyun and Yoona and go straight to Sooyoung. He wonders if he should’ve told people that she was his ideal type instead.

He finds himself heading towards one of the practice rooms, hoping to have just a peek of what SNSD’s doing as they are preparing for their first ever Japanese album. He opens the first door and he is slightly surprised to find Sooyoung alone in the dance room, resting against the wall with her headphones on and her eyes closed. She must be sleeping, he thinks he should just let her be. So he steps out of the room after he’s adjusted the thermostat. He thinks he should have woken her up, but he’s been what she’s been through and he would‘ve appreciated it if he was left alone to drift off.

 

 

 

 

They aren’t very close, Leeteuk admits. If there was a person that Sooyoung can be considered close to, it would either be Siwon or Sungmin. Right now, he’s leaning towards the belief that Sooyoung and Siwon are closer than what they let people know. He watches them talk to the filming crew about the recently concluded SMTown in LA and he fights the urge to frown as Siwon hands her the flowers. He watches Sooyoung blush and playfully hit him as he delivers what he assumes are cheesy lines. He expects them to separate after the filming crew left to bother other members, but they don’t, instead they lean into each other and exchanges whispers and smiles. He turns around, deciding that this was a private moment he shouldn’t be witnessing. He misses Sooyoung turning around to look at where he was standing.
 

 

 

 

COULD

 

 

She didn’t expect that Leeteuk would apologize to her during their filming, especially since he’s apologizing for something she thought shouldn’t worry him at all. He was telling the story of how he had unexpectedly hugged her during a game of soccer that they were watching and how he had felt guilty after doing that, thinking that he could’ve mentally scarred her. It happened 9 years ago, and she’d be lying if she said that she couldn’t remember it clearly, after all, she does remember it. It was the first time that her training sunbaes have ever done something affectionate towards her, it didn’t matter to her that they were 8 years apart and that he was 19 and she was only 11. She was grateful to him, and so she said she was. But she wishes she could have said something more when he suddenly says the words : “It’s like how you can’t forget your first love.” In the back of her mind, instead of just thanking him for doing that, she could have just said that she liked him at that time (until now though, she wasn’t too sure).

 

 

Maybe she really does have just a tiny a crush on Jungsoo when she was 11 and he was a whopping 19. Even though the employees have warned her about him, she really didn’t give them any thoughts, after all why would he even spare her a look when he’s around girls his age. But it wasn’t illegal to hope so a part of her wished that someday, maybe he’d look at her, even just as a dongsaeng he could hang out with. So when he hugged her during that game, she didn’t mind and she didn’t even think about consequences. It was when she found out that training classes were going to be divided by gender did she realize, that maybe, something went wrong. Because after that, Jungsoo stopped talking to her. He would still greet her, but even her young mind can sense that there was awkwardness between them. She didn’t like it any bit, but there wasn’t anything that she could have done to patch up what was left of their very brief friendship. When she grows up and is somehow considered to be on par with him, she realizes that she could have been the one to say it was alright and that they could have been friends.

 

Attention from Siwon was never unwanted, so she doesn’t deny basking in it when he tells her that she was the flower of today’s show. She was used to him and his antics though. He had a way with words that would make any girl swoon, unfortunately for him and fortunately for her, she has grown immune to his teasing. It was fun though, the two of them fooling around and it’s been so long since they did this. If there was a person that she could honestly say would know a lot about her, it’d be Siwon, and she was glad it was him, because if it was anybody else, then she wouldn’t know how to act. There were times that she wishes it was Leeteuk instead, but then, it was all wishful thinking. Her acquaintances call for her and Siwon , and she replies to them with an I’ll be right back. She doesn’t seem to notice Leeteuk who was hanging around the end of the stage, watching them. If only she could have seen her looking.

 

 

WOULD

 

Both wish they would not have to shy away the next time. Both wish they would have a next time, just so they could do all the things they should have done.

 

 

FIN.