so...is this the new year? ;; standalone
title ;; so...is this the new year?
author ;;
nextup_charlie
pairing ;; pete&patrick, hinting at w/o mentioning patrick&kendra
summary ;; Pete Wentz made his new year’s resolutions at the end of every January.
author's note ;;very short, something I wrote when I was bored.
deadications ;;lovelyloveleave for being a gorgeous human being; inside and out. The rest of you know who you are; Missy... :)
So is this the new year…?
Pete Wentz made his new year’s resolutions at the end of every January. It was always something simple, something that he could always achieve so that he would never be able to say that he was disappointed in himself. It was…sleep more (moderately achieved), or take less pills (he was a pharmaceutical pioneer), or write slightly more optimistic songs (never happened). Once, when he was in one of his deepest depressions to date, he made a resolution to kill himself by the end of the month. Patrick had Pete locked in a spare room by the fourth, and spent day in and day out checking on Pete and sitting outside the door.
February first. Pete sat down on his couch, the television flashing Fuse’s Loaded: My Chemical Romance. He smiles as he sees “Vampires Will Never Hurt You”—it was remarkable to believe that at the same time that video was being made in a New Jersey basement, they were also filming things in a van (while Patrick was sleeping and Pete was writing and Joe was high and Andy was driving) for their first video. So, March first. Pete has his (old, crumpled, worn, ripping, falling apart, remarkably personal except when he shows Patrick) notebook open to the back of the very last page. He meant to sit there and write out everything he wished he could do, and then erase them, or mark them out—replace them with all these minor and tiny and ridiculously stupid goals that he could not disappoint himself with. Except, he sat there and instead wrote:
“hearts don’t break, you silly fool. hearts can’t break because they beat and make you blush. No, hearts don’t break; they just crack like the glass you wrote goodbye on.”
He probably would have never left it at that; let those lines become his new philosophy until he came up with something better and more confusing, Wentzian in a way that only he could achieve. Yes, he probably would have evolved this theory into ten pages of useless writing, had Patrick not rapped his knuckles on Pete’s front window.
Usually, the roles were reversed. Pete, with tears down his face, makeup smearing, looking all lost and lonely and small. But Patrick, with his pale, pale skin glistening, eyes red and slightly puffy, looking more lost that all the combined times that Pete showed at up at said man’s own window/door/bedroom doorframe.
“She used the word forever,” Patrick sniffs, rubbing at his post-crying jag cheeks, red with salt and regret and things that Patrick was still too young to understand (the things that maybe he though Pete did). Pete (wordlessly, because there are some things that silence really does understand better) would open the door, pulling Patrick inside by the arm of his jacket, in that way that you just understood that the person needed the warmest and largest hug in their life.
Hours later (you know everything I could possibly say, Trick, they're like disclaimers by now; I'm not repeating everything you tell me when it happens, so just sit down and let me hold you okay?), Pete watched as Patrick slept on his couch, the tlevision on mute, and it arguably wasn't even the first any more--but Pete still looked at his notebook, because it was the novelty of the fact that he did this every month and it didn't really matter that he was only three hours behind. God wouldn't penalize him for that (unless he was feeling particularly nasty that day).
When Patrick woke up the next morning (afternoon, but yet again, novelty), he saw that Pete was missing, and all that was left in his wake was a folded sheet of paper.
"feb. 1st/2nd - hearts crack, but I want to fix yours. - Pete."
neely. ;; the end.
if you read the prologue of my story "the hospital chapel", click here for a note about it!
if you didn't read "the hospital chapel", click here for it!
author ;;
nextup_charliepairing ;; pete&patrick, hinting at w/o mentioning patrick&kendra
summary ;; Pete Wentz made his new year’s resolutions at the end of every January.
author's note ;;very short, something I wrote when I was bored.
deadications ;;
lovelyloveleave for being a gorgeous human being; inside and out. The rest of you know who you are; Missy... :)Pete Wentz made his new year’s resolutions at the end of every January. It was always something simple, something that he could always achieve so that he would never be able to say that he was disappointed in himself. It was…sleep more (moderately achieved), or take less pills (he was a pharmaceutical pioneer), or write slightly more optimistic songs (never happened). Once, when he was in one of his deepest depressions to date, he made a resolution to kill himself by the end of the month. Patrick had Pete locked in a spare room by the fourth, and spent day in and day out checking on Pete and sitting outside the door.
February first. Pete sat down on his couch, the television flashing Fuse’s Loaded: My Chemical Romance. He smiles as he sees “Vampires Will Never Hurt You”—it was remarkable to believe that at the same time that video was being made in a New Jersey basement, they were also filming things in a van (while Patrick was sleeping and Pete was writing and Joe was high and Andy was driving) for their first video. So, March first. Pete has his (old, crumpled, worn, ripping, falling apart, remarkably personal except when he shows Patrick) notebook open to the back of the very last page. He meant to sit there and write out everything he wished he could do, and then erase them, or mark them out—replace them with all these minor and tiny and ridiculously stupid goals that he could not disappoint himself with. Except, he sat there and instead wrote:
“hearts don’t break, you silly fool. hearts can’t break because they beat and make you blush. No, hearts don’t break; they just crack like the glass you wrote goodbye on.”
He probably would have never left it at that; let those lines become his new philosophy until he came up with something better and more confusing, Wentzian in a way that only he could achieve. Yes, he probably would have evolved this theory into ten pages of useless writing, had Patrick not rapped his knuckles on Pete’s front window.
Usually, the roles were reversed. Pete, with tears down his face, makeup smearing, looking all lost and lonely and small. But Patrick, with his pale, pale skin glistening, eyes red and slightly puffy, looking more lost that all the combined times that Pete showed at up at said man’s own window/door/bedroom doorframe.
“She used the word forever,” Patrick sniffs, rubbing at his post-crying jag cheeks, red with salt and regret and things that Patrick was still too young to understand (the things that maybe he though Pete did). Pete (wordlessly, because there are some things that silence really does understand better) would open the door, pulling Patrick inside by the arm of his jacket, in that way that you just understood that the person needed the warmest and largest hug in their life.
Hours later (you know everything I could possibly say, Trick, they're like disclaimers by now; I'm not repeating everything you tell me when it happens, so just sit down and let me hold you okay?), Pete watched as Patrick slept on his couch, the tlevision on mute, and it arguably wasn't even the first any more--but Pete still looked at his notebook, because it was the novelty of the fact that he did this every month and it didn't really matter that he was only three hours behind. God wouldn't penalize him for that (unless he was feeling particularly nasty that day).
When Patrick woke up the next morning (afternoon, but yet again, novelty), he saw that Pete was missing, and all that was left in his wake was a folded sheet of paper.
"feb. 1st/2nd - hearts crack, but I want to fix yours. - Pete."
if you read the prologue of my story "the hospital chapel", click here for a note about it!
if you didn't read "the hospital chapel", click here for it!