Just a simple girl...

And then there was Patrick...

o0pixie_dust0o — Sat, 17 Dec 2011 01:58:28 GMT

Iam not that girl.

No, I AM NOT her.

You know the girl I'm talking about- the one who falls apart after every breakup. The girl eating pints of Ben and Jerry's laced with Cheetos Puffs after yet another man has stomped vigorously on the heart she had handed him. She sits, wallowing in despair as she watches romance movies with tears streaming down her face as she screams at the main character how her love interest doesn't REALLY love her; she tells the actress how men are scum.

No, I am the girl who silently takes the heartache. He's probably better off without me anyway- what do I have to offer? Nothing. Willing to back away from anything and everything I have invested in because I know that my worth is less than he is capable of. I am fine with that.

Or, I was.

It has been just over six months. I will fight tooth and nail and say that I am over him, but I am lying. Six months and I feel like this void will never be filled because when he left he took a big, big part of my heart; what is worse, is that I let it happen. Even now, though it makes me feel weak and stupid, I have tears in my eyes because I lost an amazing friend and someone I thought had real potential as a partner.

Every day I wake up and put on this broken mask, chipped and worn from life; it serves its purpose well. I look happy. I look in love. The truth is I am in love, but I feel like nothing will ever touch what I felt for him, it is truly a whole different heartache.

Don't forget me, I begged.
I remember you said;
Sometimes it lasts in love,
But sometimes it hurts instead.

Adele's Someone Like You is so poignant. I cry every time I hear it; as cliche as it is. I just can't help it- it is my situation and feeling those lyrics hits me with a one-two punch.

I remember the letter I wrote to him after the week of crying myself to sleep realizing I had lost him. He was going to leave on my birthday. I refused to beg him to stay, no matter how much it was killing me inside to know that he was going. He was running away from the situation and I was letting him go without a fight because I knew it was just pointless. I had lost, his mind was made up. I left for work that morning and got a text telling me he had left his key on my desk and was heading out. He asked me if we were still going to be friends and keep in touch and I laughed and said that I wanted that more than anything. I had known him for eight years and I refused to let him just disappear when the romance was over- he was still one of my very best friends.

What a joke, he moved home and soon after moved to another state with his father. He hasn't contacted me since- that is the biggest heartache of all. I begged him not to pull his disappearing act on me. I told him that I needed him even if it was not going to work out in a romantic way. He assured me that he would be there and yet nothing is the same and I miss my friend every single day.

I have always felt that by crying I am showing weakness. I do not just let anybody see or hear me cry. He was there for a week of nights where I sobbed myself to sleep while he looked on blankly, played a computer game- cold, unfeeling. I know he distanced himself as a protection but it still hurts to feel like you're nothing to someone you had committed a lot to.

If it weren't for my Elodie and the two Joshuas in my life, I would still be in such a pit of sorrow.

Every day is still a struggle.

This is only the ending half of this story. I feel like I need to write- I need to get it out, this is my outlet. Secretly? I hope he stumbles upon it. I hope he finds out that he has completely broken me and left a gaping, opened wound. Not even a flesh wound- so much deeper than that, a heart wound.

This subject is not over, I would like to get the full story out, but emotion is overcoming me and the keys become blurrier with every click. Just the thought of him sends me into a flurry of emotions.

I doubt myself. I doubt everyone around me. I have pulled the safety blanket ever tighter around myself. I don't know what strength I will need to let someone in again. I feel like I have made that mistake too many times; I have trusted too many people who have just hurt me.

Such is life, right?

o0pixie_dust0o — Wed, 29 Jun 2011 18:12:54 GMT

Something great and intriguing has actually happened. Last night I got a call from one of the interviewers I'd been in contact with. It was too late to call back so I was going to wait until today.

They called me at work and have offered me a full-time position beginning July 5th! No break in service, thank God.

When I told my parents, my father informed me that my great-grandmother Sarah Zimblemann (Yes, I WAS named after her!) had worked at the same place!

It kinda gave me goosebumps.. She's been gone for so long, but I've been stressing so much about not having a job.. it's given me such a weird feeling.

Like.. coincidence? I don't know! I've never been a heavy believer of spiritual things, but this seems slightly eerie.

Otherwise, I'm so grateful! My Office Manager (my supervisor's supervisor) came and told me today that she recieved a call asking for a reccomendation for me yesterday. She is too sweet and people seem to be genuinely upset that I am leaving. They keep talking me up and it makes me feel amazing. I'm not used to getting recognition, let alone feeling deserving of it in any way.

All I can say is it's going to take quite a bit to bring this day down.

Thanks to all of you who made me feel better in my last entry. I know we barely know each other now since I've been gone from here for so long. Sometimes it just takes a bit of kindness from anyone, really, to feel better.

shrug

o0pixie_dust0o — Mon, 27 Jun 2011 03:29:16 GMT

I'm scared.

After this week I won't have a job. I've been laid off of the job I've busted my ass for for the past four years.

I've been offered part time, but that's just about as much as I would make with unemployment.. 28 hours a week with a $2.50 pay cut.

I will barely be scraping by and I don't dare ask for help.

I'm so fucking proud. I hate it. I'm scared to death that I'm going to fail and I can't even get enough courage to tell anyone, let alone let anyone help me if I'm going to need it.

I feel like I'm going to be extra needy and self-centered and I don't want it to feel like the Sarah show like it has. I've had a rough year.. this is just icing and it's only half over.

I know I'll be alright. I have an amazing family who will do what it takes to help me.. But it makes me feel dependent. It makes me feel needy, young, like I can't stand on my own feet. I don't know what's worse, the feeling like I'm always drowning in shit, or the fact that I have to reach out and take help from other people.

And in other news I think I've found someone/something that actually means something. Something of substance. I don't feel like this person only wants to be with me because I'm what many people might consider 'easy.'

Why am I that way? I just want to feel loved, wanted, needed... accepted. And in that sense I do. I know I'm not beautiful. I know that I am not thin, nor will I ever be either of those two things. Some days I tell myself how I'm nothing but a fat piece of shit and why do I deserve anything that slightly makes me happy. It's me. It's all that I've been dealt with other people. It's what I've learned, perceived, through all of my experiences. I'm ready to accept it. I'm not fishing for sympathy or compliments.

I just want to experience something that is no strings attached. Carefree, where someone loves me for all that I am AND all that I'm not. I want so bad just to feel like I have and deserve that....

Love.

o0pixie_dust0o — Tue, 14 Jun 2011 01:53:47 GMT

How do you know when you're in love?

I feel like I've been there so many times; yet it isn't enough to hold fast to the person I believe I am in love with. How do you know the first time you tell someone you love them that you are being honest and it's not just the good new feeling of a fresh relationship?

Everyone I've told I loved, I still believe I love. As cliche as it sounds, there is love and there is being in love. I love people easily. I fall for people, whether as a friend or romantic interest and I will do anything for these people. I adore them, yes; I love them. Am I in love with them? More than often not.

The question is where is the line? There is no clear-cut tape-on-the-floor show of where one goes from loving to being in love. Is there a definitive moment where one would tell? How can you even ever be sure? So many things in life are fragile- love, I believe is one of those things.

If you're unsure, does it mean that it makes the times you say it insincere? If you don't say it, are you unfeeling? What do you say when someone tells you that they love you and even though you don't want to, you doubt it? Is it wrong to doubt it if you're unsure what love really is? If you think that maybe they're more in love with the idea of who you are and what you represent instead of you yourself?

Love is such a confusing emotion. It can't accurately be described because it's different for everyone. How, then, do we know when it's real? Is the answer just not to question, to feel? I think that may be it.

It's so intangible, how can you know for sure?

Thinking.

o0pixie_dust0o — Mon, 21 Jun 2010 01:21:34 GMT

I was thinking today.. about the old dolling community, and how many fabulous friends I had.

I miss you! Kirsten, Lis, Adrea, Nett, Tee, Manda.. Just off the top of my head. I hate that I fell out of contact with any/all of you. I hate even more that there are people I've forgotten!

I'm gonna clean up this silly journal- hopefully some of you out there remember me <3

Sometimes...

o0pixie_dust0o — Mon, 19 Feb 2007 07:05:41 GMT

Sometimes you know when it's right.

When it works.

When every waking moment is spent thinking of him.

<<33

It's so right.

o0pixie_dust0o — Sun, 15 Aug 2004 20:09:12 GMT

Said "I love you" and meant it: Nope.

- Gone out in public in your pajamas: Yes, a lot.. lol

- Kept a secret from everyone: Yes.. most definitely

- Cried during a movie: hmm.. Nope.. I don't get that emotional.

- Planned your week based on the TV Guide: Nope.

- Been on stage: Yeah, several times.. I love the stage.. lol

- Been to cali: �*nods* I live here.. lol

- Hawaii: Yes

- Wished you were the opposite sex: hmmm.. Sometimes..

- Had an imaginary friend: No

- Apples or bananas: well.. that depends.. if it's a red apple I'd rather have bananas.. but green or fujis are the best.

- Blue or red: red

- Walmart or target: Target - wal mart doesn't have good music.

- Spring or Fall: Fall- I LOVE the cold

- What are you gonna do after you finish this? Continue work on my dollmaker

- What was the last meal you ate: Corndogs.. lol..

-high school or college? I actually miss high school.. lmfao.. Haven't done any college.. yet..

- Are you bored: right now.. yes.. and most of the time.. lol

- Last noise you heard: the garage door banging

- Last smell you sniffed: cats.. lol..

- Last time you went out of state/province: about 2 months ago.. June..

FRiENDSHiP / LOVE ..

- Do you believe in love at first sight: Yes, very much so.

- Do you want children one day & if so, how many? Yeah, 2 or 3 would do.. I don't want too many.. but not too few..

- Most important thing to you in a friendship is: Honesty/Trust.. definitely

- Criminal record: Is speeding criminal?

- Do you speak any other languages: A tiny bit of Spanish and tagalog..

- Last book you read: Coraline by

- Name some of your favorite things in your bedroom: My computer, my purses.. my clothes.. lol..

- Worst feeling in the world: Being alone.

- Who you love: Family, Friends� B

- Who you miss: �B� lol..

- Nickname(s): Sar� rhyming with stare..

- Initials: SAB

- How old do you look: hmm.. I'm guessing 18.. lol..

- How old do you act: it all depends.. sometimes older sometimes younger

- Glasses/Contacts: both

FiNiSH THE SENTENCE ..

- I Love to... spend time with friends.

- I Miss... B..

- I Wish... I didn't have to work tommorrow.

- I Hope... that B gets liberty again this weekend.

- I'm Annoyed.. that Jill broke up with chad..

- I Am... Sam.

- I Want to be... someone else�

LASTS ..

- Last movie you saw: Aliens Vs. Predators

- Last Phone Number You Called: Chad

- Last show you watched on TV: Phil of the future.. lmao..

HAVE YOU EVER ..

- Thought you were going to die: No

- Wanted to Run away: Lots of times

- Flunked a grade: No

- Skipped a grade: Nope

DO..

- you have a crush on someone: NO where would you get that idea?! *dies*.. lol..

- you wish u could live somewhere else: All the time.

- you think about suicide: I have.. yes..

- you believe in online dating: Hey if it works for others, why not?

- you want more piercings: Yes

- you like cleaning: Definitely not.. lol..

- you like roller coasters:Yes!

FOR OR AGAiNST..

- long distance relationships: hmm.. Don't really care.. lol..

- using someone: against

- suicide: depends on the situation.

- killing people : same as above.

- teenage smoking: Against

- driving drunk: Against

- gay/lesbian relationship: For.

FAVORiTE..

- soap operas: None.

- food : hmm.. Anything with carbs.. lmfao..

- thing to do: Go to the theater with B.

- sports: I like playing soccer.. and watching very few sports.

- sports team: None.

- drinks: Water, Cherry Pepsi

- clothes: Capris, Jeans, Anything that's comfortable.

- holiday: Christmas.. lol.

- word: Indeed.. XD

- guy name: Hayden

- girl name: same.. lol..

- eye color: hmm.. Never really thought of it..

- piercing: None really..

- actor/actress : None.. really.. lol..

DO YOU THiNK YOU ARE..

- funny: Yes.. lol.. I've been told so, so I have to believe it! Lol..

- friendly: to my friends.. lmfao..

- amusing: In my eyes I am.. lol..

- loveable: Most definitely

- optimistic: at times

- caring: Oh god, yes.. sometimes too much..

- dorky: A lot of times yes.

- Spell your first name backwards: Haras

- The story behind your name: Named after my great Grandmother

- Are you straight: Yes

- 4 words that sum you up: Kind, Caring, Funny, Shy

WHO OR WHAT (WAS/iS/ARE) ..

- In my mouth: Corn Dogs..

- In my head: whatever is in everyone's head.. lol..

- Wishing: I didn't have to go to work tommorrow.

- After this: Gaia, foo!

- Talking to: Abbeh!

- Eating: Nada

- If you could get away with it and murder anyone,
who and for what reason: Wilma� because she's so� ignorant? No.. mean.. rude.. arrogant.. just� she pisses me off! Lol..

- Person you wish you could see right now: B

- Something you're looking forward to in this up
coming month: B getting back.. lol..

- Something that you are afraid of: Spiders..

- Do you like candles: yep

- Do you believe in love: *nod* yes

- Do you believe in soul mates: Yes

- Do you believe in love at first sight: uh, this test is way too repetitive <- yeah I agree. <~~ I second that <-- me three � Me four!

- Do you believe in forgiveness: Yes.

- Do you believe in God: yes

- If you could have any animal for a pet: a kitten or puppy.. lol..

- What is the latest you've ever stayed up: probably 24-30 hours

- Ever been to Belgium: No

- Can you eat with chopsticks : yes.. lol..

- What are some of your favorite pig out foods: Pizza, Pastas.. Chips.. lol.. Cookies..

- What's something that you wish people would
understand: That people are people and you shouldn't judge them the second you see them, but take a chance and get to know them before doing so.

- What's something you wish you could understand
better: PHP

- Something you want to make happen tomorrow: I have to clean my room.. lol

o0pixie_dust0o — Thu, 12 Aug 2004 22:12:04 GMT

If i were someone else
Would you love me?
If i weren't me
Would you feel the way i do?
If i lived a different life
Would things be any different?
If i didn't love you
Would i still feel this way?

o0pixie_dust0o — Tue, 13 Jul 2004 23:18:14 GMT

IMDB's Top 100 Best Movies of All Time
generate this HTML for your own page at ObeytheFist.com

</tr

Rank	Movie	Didn't See It/ Started It/ Finished It/ Hated It!
1	Godfather, The (1972)
2	Shawshank Redemption, The (1994)
3	Godfather: Part II, The (1974)
4	Lord of the Rings: The Return of the King, The (2003)	Finished It
5	Lord of the Rings: The Two Towers, The (2002)	Finished It
6	Casablanca (1942)	Started It
7	Lord of the Rings: The Fellowship of the Ring, The (2001)	Finished It
8	Schindler's List (1993)	Finished It
9	Shichinin no samurai (1954)
10	Star Wars (1977)	Finished It
11	Citizen Kane (1941)
12	One Flew Over the Cuckoo's Nest (1975)	Finished It
13	Dr. Strangelove or: How I Learned to Stop Worrying and Love the Bomb (1964)
14	Rear Window (1954)
15	Star Wars: Episode V - The Empire Strikes Back (1980)	Finished It
16	Raiders of the Lost Ark (1981)	Finished It
17	Memento (2000)
18	Usual Suspects, The (1995)
19	Pulp Fiction (1994)
20	North by Northwest (1959)
21	12 Angry Men (1957)	Finished It
22	Fabuleux destin d'Amélie Poulain, Le (2001)
23	Psycho (1960)	Finished It
24	Lawrence of Arabia (1962)
25	Buono, il brutto, il cattivo, Il (1966)
26	Silence of the Lambs, The (1991)	Started It
27	It's a Wonderful Life (1946)	Started It
28	Goodfellas (1990)
29	American Beauty (1999)	Finished It
30	Vertigo (1958)	Started It
31	Sunset Blvd. (1950)
32	Matrix, The (1999)	Hated It!
33	Apocalypse Now (1979)
34	Pianist, The (2002)
35	To Kill a Mockingbird (1962)	Finished It
36	C'era una volta il West (1968)
37	Some Like It Hot (1959)
38	Third Man, The (1949)
39	Taxi Driver (1976)
40	Paths of Glory (1957)
41	Sen to Chihiro no kamikakushi (2001)
42	Fight Club (1999)	Started It
43	Boot, Das (1981)
44	Double Indemnity (1944)
45	L.A. Confidential (1997)
46	Chinatown (1974)
47	Singin' in the Rain (1952)
48	Maltese Falcon, The (1941)
49	M (1931)
50	Requiem for a Dream (2000)
51	Bridge on the River Kwai, The (1957)
52	All About Eve (1950)
53	Se7en (1995)
54	Monty Python and the Holy Grail (1975)	Finished It
55	Saving Private Ryan (1998)	Finished It
56	Cidade de Deus (2002)
57	Raging Bull (1980)
58	Rashômon (1950)
59	Wizard of Oz, The (1939)	Finished It
60	Sting, The (1973)
61	Alien (1979)	Finished It
62	American History X (1998)
63	Mr. Smith Goes to Washington (1939)
64	Léon (1994)
65	Vita è bella, La (1997)
66	Touch of Evil (1958)
67	Manchurian Candidate, The (1962)
68	2001: A Space Odyssey (1968)
69	Treasure of the Sierra Madre, The (1948)
70	Great Escape, The (1963)
71	Wo hu cang long (2000)
72	Reservoir Dogs (1992)	Started It
73	Clockwork Orange, A (1971)	Finished It
74	Amadeus (1984)	Started It
75	Modern Times (1936)
76	Ran (1985)
77	Annie Hall (1977)
78	Jaws (1975)	Finished It
79	On the Waterfront (1954)
80	Braveheart (1995)	Finished It
81	High Noon (1952)
82	Apartment, The (1960)
83	Fargo (1996)	Finished It
84	Sixth Sense, The (1999)	Finished It
85	Aliens (1986)	Finished It
86	Shining, The (1980)	Finished It
87	Strangers on a Train (1951)
88	Blade Runner (1982)	Started It
89	Metropolis (1927)
90	Duck Soup (1933)
91	Finding Nemo (2003)	Finished It
92	Donnie Darko (2001)	Finished It
93	General, The (1927)

o0pixie_dust0o — Mon, 12 Jul 2004 22:05:54 GMT

The University of Blogging

Presents to
o0pixie_dust0o

An Honorary
Bachelor of
Comment Spam

Majoring in
Psychotic Ranting

Signed
Dr. GoQuiz.com

�

Blogging Degree
From Go-Quiz.com

The Makings of my Mask

o0pixie_dust0o — Tue, 23 Mar 2004 20:11:10 GMT

I wear not a face
But a thousand masks
All I hide behind
Hoping for my true self
Never to shine through
The masks are stereotypes
Of what I'm supposed to be
Masks that I hide behind so that nobody can see

With my friends there are many
Fire symbolizes the unruliness in hurting
Without knowing
Water is the way we flow together
As friends so evenly
Wind is wiled, untamed and free
Something I keep in my mind always
The earth is my refuge
A place that I live
All of the elements are in my masks

The moon, all stages
Symbolizing something so bright in the future
However untouchable
Rainbows...
Find the end and treasure is with you
Kinda like our lives
Shooting stars we wish upon
Never realizing how lucky we truly are
Flowers so fragile
Blowing in the wind
Free as can be
A freedom we will never have
Until the fateful day
When we will be complete

Tears
So many have I cried
A lifelong battle I can never win
Keeping them inside
Purple is the color of Royalty
Royalty everyone is
And pink the color of love
A love we all wish for

All these things
Mixed in a mask that I hide behind
Never letting the real person show through
If you had a mask this beautiful...
Would You?

o0pixie_dust0o — Sun, 14 Mar 2004 12:34:26 GMT

(_) i've never been drunk
(X) i've never smoked pot
(X) i've never kissed a member of the opposite sex
(X) i've never kissed a member of the same sex
(X) i've never crashed a friend's car
(X) i've never been to japan
(_) i've never ridden in a taxi
(X) i've never had anal sex
(_) i've never been in love
(X) i've never had sex
(X) i've never had sex in public
(X) i've never been dumped
(_) i've never shoplifted
(X) i've never been fired
(X) i've never been in a fist fight
(X) i've never had a threesome
(X) i've never snuck out of my parent's house
(X) i've never been tied up (sexually)
(X) i've never been caught masturbating
(X) i've never pissed on myself
(X) i've never had sex with a member of the same sex
(X) i've never been arrested
(X) i've never made out with a stranger
(_) i've never stolen something from my job (I’m not like a monster or something.. lol.. I’m counting like.. a band aid and a little bit of paper here.. lmfao)
(X) i've never celebrated new years in times square
(X) i've never gone on a blind date
(_) i've never lied to a friend
(_) i've never had a crush on a teacher
(X) i've never celebrated mardi-gras in new orleans
(X) i've never been to europe
(_) i've never skipped school
(X) i've never slept with a co-worker
(_) i've never cut myself on purpose
(X) i've never had sex at the office
(X) i never got married
(X) i never got divorced
(X) i never had children
(X) I NEVER HAVE BEEN FISTED AND/OR HAVE NEVER FISTED ANYONE
(X) I NEVER HAVE THROWN UP IN A BAR
(X) I NEVER HAVE BEEN TO JAMAICA
(_) I NEVER PLAYED AN ORGANIZED SPORT
(X) I NEVER HAVE HAD GOOD ORAL SEX
(X) I NEVER CAUGHT MY PARENTS HAVING SEX
(X) I HAVE NEVER HAD PHONE SEX
(X) I HAVE NEVER HAD SEX MORE THAN 4 TIMES IN A WEEK
(_) I HAVE NEVER BEEN ON AN AIRPLANE
(X) I HAVE NEVER BEEN HOSPITOLIZED
----------------------------------------------------------
lol.. I have never done a lot of things.. lmfao

stolen shamelessly from giagirl

o0pixie_dust0o — Sat, 28 Feb 2004 19:42:16 GMT

take the color quiz!

Your Existing Situation
Volatile and outgoing. Needs to feel that events are developing along desired lines, otherwise irritation can lead to changeability or superficial activities.

Your Stress Sources
Resists any form of pressure from others and insists on her independence as an individual. Wants to make up her own mind without interference, to draw her own conclusions and arrive at her own decisions. Detests uniformity and mediocrity. As she wants to be regarded as one who gives authoritative opinions, she find it difficult to admit to being wrong, while at times she is reluctant to accept or understand another's point of view.

Your Restrained Characteristics
Circumstances are such that she feels forced to compromise for the time being if she is to avoid being cut off from affection or from full participation.
Believes that she is not receiving her share--that she is neither properly understood nor adequately appreciated. Feels that she is being compelled to conform, and close relationships leave her without any sense of emotional involvement.

An unadmitted lack of confidence makes her careful to avoid open conflict and she feels she must make the best of things as they are.

Exacting in her emotional demands, especially during moments of intimacy leaving her frustrated in her desire for a perfect union.

Your Desired Objective
Takes easily and quickly to anything which provides stimulation. Preoccupied with things of an intensely exciting nature, whether erotically stimulating or otherwise. Wants to be regarded as an exciting and interesting personality with an altogether charming and impressive influence on others. Uses tactics cleverly so as to avoid endangering her chances of success or undermined others' confidence in herself.

Your Actual Problem
Greatly impressed by the unique, by originality, and by individuals of outstanding characteristics. Tries to emulate the characteristics she admires and to display originality in her own personality.

Your Actual Problem #2
Seeks to avoid criticism and to prevent restriction of her freedom to act, and to decide for herself by the exercise of great personal charm in her dealings with others.

wow.. I think it's really true to me.. a lot of what it said is how i am ... that's... weird.. lol

I gave into peer pressure.. Questions from tyskkvinna

o0pixie_dust0o — Wed, 18 Feb 2004 20:44:44 GMT

1) What is, in your mind, the true definition of "beauty"?
Of course It's gonna be "What's Inside is what counts" but I truly believe that. I hate it when people judge you by the way you look, act or talk before they even get to know you, and I think anyone is beautiful who feels beautiful. If you have the self esteem to say "I Am beautiful" than you truly are. It also depends on the attitude of a person.. Some people are really self centered and don't care about other people, and those aren't beautiful people.

2) How much more do you have to do on your senior project?
Well.. lol.. Not really too much.. My perfect square site shall be opened soon I only have the "About the site" page to complete.. I'm really happy with it, too! http://perfect-square.net/sunset.html ;)

3) What makes your day?
When someone says or does something truly nice for me.. or if someone just.. gives me positive attention.. I'm the kind of person who craves for praise but won't actually outwardly show that.. I need a lot of attention to feel loved and I get hurt at really small things.

4) How would you like to change the world?
That's a really good question. I don't truly have an answer, but If i can change one person, that would mean the same to me. I want people to see that just because you don't look perfect on the outside, that doesn't mean you're not a stunning person.. Not enough people take the time out to get to know people before judging them, and that's something that I'd love to remedy in this world.

5) What is your favourite place outside of California?
Outside of California? I'd definitely say Alaska.. Apart from only bieng out of California a very few times, I just recall so much fun from when we went to Alaska last.. We're going again in june.. hehe.. But I just get this calm, warm feeling when I think about our last trip..

ASK ME MORE! lol...

o0pixie_dust0o — Mon, 26 Jan 2004 19:11:34 GMT

*HUGS* TOTAL!

give o0pixie_dust0o more *HUGS*

Get hugs of your own

that is all

o0pixie_dust0o — Thu, 01 Jan 2004 23:15:08 GMT

http://www.straylightrun.com/

you go see now..

download existentialism on prom night... yummy!

thanks, __pointandclick for the awesome new band!

o0pixie_dust0o — Fri, 14 Nov 2003 20:36:51 GMT

my hat tut is up at the college at the realm.. It's a realm exclusive!! w00t!

o0pixie_dust0o — Fri, 14 Nov 2003 19:58:48 GMT

hmm.. strange how i thought so wrong..

I mean, one would think that if you save someone from a free website host they'd be grateful.. no?

I guess now *sighs and shakes head*

o0pixie_dust0o — Fri, 14 Nov 2003 19:27:48 GMT

OOOhhhhh crystall.....

*just rented DOGMA*

o0pixie_dust0o — Thu, 13 Nov 2003 22:37:20 GMT

I did it in 21</big></b> seconds.
I deserved a B+!!
Take the How Dexterous Are You? Quiz!!

o0pixie_dust0o — Thu, 13 Nov 2003 15:04:49 GMT

*works diligently on her christmas gifts*

oh! if you want to recieve a christmas card from me irl, please let me know your address somehow!

o0pixie_dust0o — Wed, 12 Nov 2003 22:19:41 GMT

oh lordy.. another fun link.. this time it's educational!
http://www.lawforkids.org/animation/TPSpellsTrouble.cfm

o0pixie_dust0o — Wed, 12 Nov 2003 22:13:41 GMT

*wonders if nettly just MIGHT have the gift i gave her asking to be sisters*

XD
I NEED it! XD...

but if you don't have it.. that's fine.. lmao

o0pixie_dust0o — Tue, 11 Nov 2003 21:00:54 GMT

hmm.. I might have an icon community handed over to me.. would anyone like to help me out if i get it?

o0pixie_dust0o — Tue, 11 Nov 2003 20:42:16 GMT

it is...
fini...