The Wonderful World of NessaButterfly

how to train your Dragon.

nessabutterfly — Mon, 05 Mar 2012 09:21:03 GMT

In an attempt to train Dragon, I found my old notebook of drabbles that I wrote like five to six years ago! There were still about ten of them that I hadn't typed up. Dragon is GREAT for transcribing things! I've got it to work a lot better now. In fact, why don't I switch over to it and write without editing. Let's see how much better it does now that I've used it more.

well, I tried to train Dragon more by doing some of the reading, but for some reason I kept messing up and would never analyze the audio data. So instead, I went about it the slow way just started using it, and doing a lot of verbal corrections. It only transit, if you do all of your corrections verbally. And trust me, it is a slow process. Luckily, I am at the point, where I can read my stories one paragraph at the time. I even got Dragon to recognize names like Usagi and Mamoru. It still had a lot of trouble with Mamoru but not like it used to. For some reason, it really prefers to use the word memory. And Usagi and seven being held boggy. That should sayspelled buggy buggy.

oh no. Stupid Dragon just deleted two paragraphs. And here I was bragging about how much better it was working.anyway, I've just been talking about how to train Dragon on the new work. I was saying that if I could just get over not trying to edit things paragraph by paragraph, that Dragon could actually work pretty fast or nine Nana right now. See, there's a new word I need to train him. Nana Raima. So, here's how training work. First, you say the word. Nana Ramo. Then, you select the word by saying select than the word. After that, utility to want to spell that word I won't use the exact phrase because of the command that will take effect. After you spell the word, you can tell Dragon that you want to train it on the new word. Then you say the word and Dragon learns it. Sometimes you have to use it about 20 or 30 times before really understand what you mean for example I must've said memory about 100 times before it started really picking up. And there is proof that it still doesn't get it every time. Because I did not say memory I said memory. And there it goes again. Because I was not saying memory everything Mamoru. Finally.

Okay so, we are going to train Dragon how to write the word Nana Ramo. I will say the word: Nana Ramo. NaNoWriMo. So, I spelled and trained Dragon. Now let's see if it works: NaNoWriMo! Success! I guess it helped, that nothing else there and quite like NaNoWriMo.

And there you go, how to train your Dragon.

Trying something new...

nessabutterfly — Sat, 03 Mar 2012 07:00:14 GMT

For my birth day, Mark got me Dragon naturally speaking. It is a voice recognition program. With my hands hurting so bad, typing can be hard. It takes a lot of work to train Dragon. I was impressed at first, but now it is taking a lot of going back and fixing about half of the words. If I say too many words at once, it usually messes up. And the more words you say at one time, the harder it is to fix it.

For example, I have been working on this post for over 20 min. can you believe that? The more I use Dragon, the better it is supposed to get. It has to learn my voice. Actually, I have had to fix anything in this paragraph yet. Maybe I am just getting better at using it?

I hope that I will have Dragon properly trained before my next round of chemo. They are reducing my dose 5FU, because it causes many hand problems. They will also reduce the oxaliplatin (wow, it caught that word!) Because of the cold sensitivity and nerve pain. They also gave me a prescription for an old antidepressant that helps with neuropathy (nerve pain). Hopefully I won't have any more hand pain as bad as I did two weeks ago. I could hardly lift my fork. But at least if it does happen again, I can still write. I am getting a little bit better at figuring out how best to go about fixing Dragon's mistakes. Sometimes it is better to just delete the problematic word or phrase rather than selecting it and trying to correct it. If there was an error in the middle of a phrase, just delete the whole phrase and they the words before the error then pause, and say the problematic word alone. It is easier to fix that way.

Boy, it sure is slow getting started on this. Back in November when I first heard about Dragon, it was at a writers Association meeting. The president of the Association did a live demonstration of Dragon. Hers was well trained and had far less errors. Hopefully I can get my Dragon trained that well. I have been working on this post for almost an hour. It would have been faster to hunt and peck with my pinkies like I did when my fingers were hurting. Still, it is kind of fun to watch my words show up on the street; even if I do have two say them one at a time.

Okay, time for a test. I am just going to start talking without going back and fixing anything. Let's see what happens. Here we go:

Well let's see if the punctuation can handle things that are also real word were example when I say: what happened exactly. I have colon cancer will look it caught at that time, but if I just talk about my: without the word cancer, it doesn't catch it. I'm special: I have no:. You see, if I go to pay cancer after: it just gives me the punctuation marks. But, if I say: cancer of his work that time, it did not work that time. Let's try again. I do not like having colon cancer. There worked. Did you know that may bring part five years it's messing up… I said grainbrain fart. Let's try that again. If you know that March is: cancer: can there overcome on bargain. Did you know that March is: cancer March is: cancer why doesn't it work? March is: cancer whatever… It is: cancer awareness month. Today was where blue day because blue special color: cancer. Colon cancer ridden it was. The colon cancer ribbon in live blimp blue finally. I this paragraph is miserable to read. Clearly I cannot eat naturally be the week because. I cannot take talk naturally with Dragon yet. Time to go do more training.

Sailor Moon Land

nessabutterfly — Fri, 20 Jan 2012 01:09:17 GMT

Come play! I love this community-- it's set up as team-based battles. You win points for your team with writing and graphics challenges as well as completing puzzles, games, and activities. It's really a lot of fun. You can participate as much or as little as you want (as long as you do 2 activities or voting every 2 weeks). Or you can join as a social member and only participate when something really strikes your fancy.

Here's where to join. http://sailormoonland.livejournal.com/66996.html

My new normal

nessabutterfly — Thu, 19 Jan 2012 11:39:16 GMT

Okay, I promised another post, so here it is.

I'm so blah. I'm not sure if it's still leftover fatigue from the chemo or just that I've gotten into a habit of being tired/lazy. Maybe both?

I'm also VERY distractable. The brain fog has worn off for the most part, but I lose focus really easily. It's frustrating and it takes me a lot longer to complete tasks. It's almost like drug-induced ADD. I might be able to relate better to Mark after all of this! (I don't WANT ADD!!)

And here's something weird-- whenever I sneeze, my innards shudder! They're not firmly attached anymore, so everything shifts around. It's pretty distressing, to be honest. I don't feel like my body is my own. Oh, and on that note-- the PORT! I am a cyborg now, says Mark. I don't think my port really qualifies me since it's not mechanical. I should ask Marissa-- she's pretty much an expert on cyborgs now!

Anyway, I have a small (ha! Feels huge!) titanium port implanted in my chest. It's basically like a little bowl with a thick silicon lid and a hose running from it to my heart. They poke a needle through the silicon (and my skin!) into the open part of the bowl. Then whatever liquid they force in (works like like an IV) runs through the hose (catheter) which is tunneled under the skin to my neck where it is threaded into my jugular vein and ends just shy of my heart. Chemo will eat away at your veins if they use a regular IV. A few hours worth of infusion can blow a vein-- which is UGLY (think varicose veins on legs) and makes the vein unusable in the future. Therefore, the port is really necessary. Horrible, but necessary. Anyway, it dumps it in the "waterfall" entrance to the heart where it is mixed with large blood volumes and quickly dispersed through the body.

The worst thing about the port is that they create a pocket in the muscle and implant it in your upper chest.

(Oh, it totally looks like this is an open wound, but they used the skin glue on it. It's basically super glue. It'll fall off around day 10 (2 more days!!). It's supposed to heal prettier than staples or stitches. Good-- that's my chest!)

Once it heals, it's invisible. For most people. I have no fat. It sticks WAY out! You can even see it through my clothes!

And can I feel it? You betcha! I mean, it's implanted in the muscle-- every upper body movement on the right side of my body drags it across the rib it's stitched over (it needs something solid behind it to brace against the pressure needed to get the needle through the silicon!) Here, read about this miserable thing for yourself (and see a pic-- mine is the top of the three listed toward the bottom of the page) http://www.angiodynamics.com/products/smart-port-ct Sorry, can't remember how to do fancy links and I'm too lazy to look (I'd get distracted and come back an hour from now!).

Anywho, the port sucks, but the catheter is even worse! It snakes up and over my collar bone. That's a sensitive spot. Put your finger right under your collar bone, give it a little pressure, then push it up and over. Then down, then up. Do this a few times. Now imagine a 1/4" tube under the skin that does this EVERY TIME YOU MOVE YOUR HEAD! Yeah, just try to left shoulder check while driving. Sometimes I get nausea just from the feeling of this thing under my skin.

My body is not my own!

Even things that should no longer affect me still are. The prednisone I stopped taking a full month ago for example. I knew about the mustache it grew for me-- I've been plucking that. And my leg and underarm hair has been growing thicker and faster than usual, but whatever, I can shave it. But the other day I was shaving my underarms and the sun was shining through the bathroom window (gotta use an electric razor to minimize risk of nicks!) and I noticed that my BOOBS WERE HAIRY! I should also state for the record, I am NOT normally a hairy person at all. I could go a month without shaving my legs and you would have to be uncomfortably close to me to notice. Yeah. My body is CLEARLY not my own. It belongs to some hairy man with acne and metal stuff implanted in his hairy, boobless chest! (Cause I'm so underweight!) Oh, and that's not even mentioning the whole fact that there's a plastic bag taped to my tummy to collect poo. Yup. I guess I'm getting used to that one so I forget it's even there. Until it's full. Then it's just annoying.

Okay, so that's the port and the non-chemo stuff. Let's move on to the actual drugs. So, most people have their port put into a week or so before chemo starts, but because of my allergy testing, we couldn't prove that it was (most likely) safe until 2 days before my chemo was supposed to start. So it went in the same day. Yeah. Like, I had time to eat a snack when I woke up from surgery (well, from the end of surgery-- I woke up once in the middle-- that was a little freaky. Especially since the local anesthetic was a little lacking at the upper incision and I felt them stitching me. I yelped, then passed out-- they gave me more sleepy drugs!)

Sorry for the rambling-- I just can't keep my brain running straight, and I'm too lazy to edit this down to making sense, so stream of consciousness is what you get!

So, I woke up, had a snack, met with my oncologist (cancer doctor for those not in the know), where I was told that I had spots on my liver and ovary that are *probably* not cancer, but I'm having MRIs next week to be sure. They're checking my brain too because Lynch can cause brain tumors and my head has been not right for months. Probably just stress (cause who wouldn't have stress-induced brain issues?), but because of the increased risk, they're checking to put me at ease. Anyway, he tells me not to worry about those spots (yeah right!) and sends me off to infusion.

They put the needle into the port while I was out (I'm glad of that-- they missed-- there are two needle-pricks!), so I don't know what that experience is like. Some say it hurts a lot, others say it's no big deal compared to an IV. They gave me a tube of lidocaine cream to put on an hour before needle insertion, so I guess that means it's at least a little painful, but maybe well-controlled with the cream? I think I'll apply it twice next week-- once at an hour and once at 20 minutes-- just to be sure it hasn't worn off! I am a wimp. Of course, I hardly bat an eye at getting an IV these days-- no anxiety until a few seconds before the poke-- so I think I'll get used to it quick enough.

Normally the needle will be put in when I first arrive. They will use it to draw blood for my labs (they have to make sure the previous chemo hasn't knocked down your blood levels too much. If you're not "healthy" enough, they can't knock you down further and your infusion is cancelled that week). Then you wait an hour or so for the labs, see the doctor so he can make sure the rest of you is really healthy enough to handle the chemo. THEN it's off to infusion.

So, the needle is in and 4" or so of tubing is taped to my chest, waiting to be hooked up. First, I got steroids (Decadron), which I will NOT be getting again. It's supposed to help with the nausea and fatigue, but for me, it causes horrible heartburn (the prednisone did too, but not nearly this bad!). 2 days after my infusion, the heartburn was SO BAD that even with all sorts of drugs (prescription and Tums), I had to stay bolt upright. If I reclined even a little, it caused such bad chest pain (doesn't really burn-- not sure why they call it heartburn), and within a few minutes, the nausea would roll in. I threw up a few times and I place full blame on the Decadron!

Second infusion was the Aloxi. This is the "super drug". It's a new IV antinausea drug that's only a few years old and has, apparently, changed the way chemo happens now. Most people have their nausea so well controlled that they don't puke at all, or maybe only a few times at home once it wears off and before other drugs kick in. I like Aloxi-- I'll keep this drug :) I had NO nausea at all during infusion or the next day. (When I say "infusion", I mean the first of my two chemo drugs-- I'll refer to the other one as the "pump")

Then I got a little packet of calcium and magnesium. This is to prevent the nerve damage of the first chemo drug. It's the only one that I "felt" side effects from during infusion. Magnesium by IV makes you hot. I'm lucky-- I just felt like someone turned up the heat. I had to take off my sweater. Some people feel like they're sitting in the sun with a horrible sun burn. Some people can't handle it at all. They have to slow down the drip and take a few hours to get the infusion (mine was about 20 minutes at the normal drip speed).

Finally, after being hooked up to the IV pump for like 2 hours, they started the "chemo" (I got a 10 minute saline flush between each drug so that they don't mix). Oxaliplatin is the first toxin they pumped into me. (Please don't tell me to think of it like a sweet healing nectar from heaven-- it's poison and I know it. I just hope the cancer cells all die and enough of mine stick around to keep me from having permanent side effects!). Some people start to feel the first side effects within a few minutes of starting the infusion. The most common side effect (like 90% + of people who get this drug experience it) is cold sensitivity. You can't touch, swallow, or breath anything cold. If you touch it, (especially fingers and toes), it will feel like little daggers are stabbing you. Thousands of them. So cold that they're hot. It HURTS and when you forget and touch something, sometimes it will make you YELL with both surprise and pain. And cold means anything below room temp! I have to wear mittens to reach into the fridge or freezer. It makes it difficult to cook even, cause there are foods that you have to touch that are cold-- and wearing mittens just doesn't work. Then there is the swallowing. Room temp or warmer. All food and drink. The cold sensitivity didn't kick in until about 6 hours after the Oxali was infused, so I kinda thought I'd get away without it (ha!) and had some cool (slightly below room temp-- warmer than fridge!) water. One sip and my throat felt like it was shut completely. Feels like an anaphylactic reaction for any who have experienced that. They *say* it only feels like it and your throat isn't really shutting (it's a nerve issue), but I lost my voice for about half an hour. It paralyzed my vocal cords and I couldn't speak. SCARY. I will be SOOO careful with this side effect from now on! I haven't noticed the breathing cold air thing to be too bad. I've been outside with the kids a few times this week. I did stay inside the first few days though, and used a scarf across my mouth the few times I had to go house-to car-to cancer clinic. A few times I felt a little tightening, but I have cold-induced asthma and it felt exactly like that (a mild version of that) and it was cold enough to trigger that, so I'm not sure which one it was. I'm used to dealing with that (or I was when I lived here previously), so it didn't bother me much. Maybe other people would freak out more? I did the first few times I had the asthma issue in college!

So, my cold sensitivity in throat started about 6 hours in and in my hands, it was the next morning. I was told it would start to wear off within about 2-5 days. No. Throat wore off first. At about 6 days, I could drink cold stuff again. Right now I'm working on a popsicle. The cold sensitivity started to *decrease* around day 5. I could put my hand in the fridge briefly to grab something, but couldn't hold it for more than a few seconds. Still needed the mittens if it was heavy and needed a good grip or was towards the back and required moving things around. Today was day 8 and I STILL had pain when touching things in the freezer and when going outside to play with the kids in the snow. (meaning, I stood there for 10 mins taking pictures with my mittens on and never touched the snow!). They say that it will last longer with each infusion. By the end of the 6 months it won't go away between treatments at all. It does eventually go away for most people, but it can take up to 5 years (that's the timeframe for ALL side effects!! Sucky! 6 months to 5 years!)

Of course, the cold sensitivity is part of a bigger issue. It's the surface symptom of something much much worse. Peripheral neuropathy: nerve damage in hands and feet, mostly toes and fingers. This is nerve pain that comes on without cold, tingling, and numbness in fingers and toes. It can range from mild to severe. It's Oxali's worst side effect and it TERRIFIES me. I NEED my fingers. If I can't feel, I could seriously injure myself while sewing or making jewelry. Assuming I can even manage a needle or pliers and itty bitty beads with numb fingers. Some people lose feeling in their toes to the point where they trip over things. Lots of broken bones are attributed to neuropathy. And it doesn't help that steroids can cause osteoporosis, so our bones are fragile to start with!

Oxali also causes nausea and vomiting (yay aloxi!) and some other digestive issues.

After the Oxali, I got another infusion of calcium and magnesium. The neuropathy is such an issue that they give this before AND after it to do as much damage control as possible. I'm also supposed to be taking B6 and B12 because they're good for the nervous system. Finally bought them yesterday. Should probably take them! The second infusion made me REALLY hot. I had to walk around in the hall (dragging that stupid IV pole) because the little bit of moving air from walking cooled my skin a little. It faded soon after the drip was done though. I could always ask them to slow it down next time since I'll be stuck until Mark gets off work, but it was already after 8pm at that point and I just wanted to get on with it!

Then after a final saline flush, I got hooked up to my 5FU pump. It has a longer name, but I never took the time to learn it-- everyone just calls it 5FU. I was supposed to get Leucovorin too (a super form of folic acid), but there is a drug shortage and it's not available. This scares me a little because there is only one study that shows that this particular combo of drugs is effective for people with Lynch syndrome and it included the leucovorin. 5FU on it's own is BAD for people with lynch, but the 3 drug combo had good results. They don't know if the other two drugs still work without it. Is it really just the oxali making the 5FU safe for me or do I really need the leucovorin? I HATE that there isn't good info for lynch treatment yet. Then again, I should be grateful-- lynch is one of the very few genetic cancers, or genetic issues AT ALL that has been coded in the human genome. I should be grateful for that I guess. There are SO MANY genetic diseases that they haven't figured out yet and are probably being treated all wrong, but they just don't know. We have a little to go on and that's A LOT! (wow, I'm actually tearing up. I haven't cried in a few weeks!)

Okay, so, the 5FU pump. It's like a smallish crossbody purse.

I didn't take a pic of the thing so I totally snagged this pic of the exact same pump and bag from this guy's rectal cancer blog http://johnscancerblog.blogspot.com/2010_12_01_archive.html Anyway they hook it up to the port tubing (every drug change means switching the 4" long dangling tubing to a different set of tubing attached to the bag of meds. Can we say WASTE? Oh, and talking about waste, each cycle requires 4 complete disposible outfits for the nurse. They have to wear these protective plastic apron/smock things. They're high necked and long sleeved. Plus crazy thick gloves. And maybe masks? I can't quite remember, but I think there was a mask. Wait, yes, a mask that covered the mouth and nose AND included a splash mask over the eyes. Or... was that the surgical nurse? It's a little foggy in my mind. maybe the chemo nurses were just mouth/nose... anyway, they could wear normal gloves and scrubs with no mask when changing out all the other meds, but before they could open the outer bag of the Oxali or 5FU, they had to suit up. So, once before and once after Oxali, then once before 5FU. Then when I go for my disconnect on the 5FU 2 days later, they suit up again! WASTE, I tell you. I need to do it too though. Whenever I empty my ostomy bag, while I'm on chemo and for 24 hours after (that's a total of almost 4 days every 2 weeks!!). You don't have to wear gloves if you use the potty like a normal human, but having an illeostomy makes things a little (or a LOT) more liquidey and the process of cleaning up the pour spout on the bag makes it more likely that you'll get some on you. It doesn't *usually* happen, but that risk is higher than with normal wiping. But think about this-- it's so toxic that they're afraid it will harm you on it's way OUT of the body, yet they're pumping this stuff directly into your heart!!

So now I'm connected to the 5FU pump and sent on my way. 46 hours of one drop of poison every 5 minutes. 1/2 ml per hour. It makes a little whirring sound every time. It's a little annoying, but you get used to it. The bigger problem is that you're tethered to the stupid bag. It goes EVERYWHERE with you! It just barely zipped into my coat (since I kept pulling my sweater on and off, I put it on just above my tank top). The strap irritated my port. You have to wear it cross-body so you don't drop it. I can't wear it on the right shoulder cause it would be directly across my port, but on the left, it still rubbed the bottom of the port. I suppose if I had boobs, they would hold the strap down, but... well, I have nearly nothing there-- I can't say none, since I've made a new friend who has breast cancer. I have some, just not much! It gets in the way when I go to the bathroom, so I have to put it on the hook behind the door. It gets in the way when I sleep, so its on the nightstand. It would get in the way in the shower, but I'm not allowed to shower at all when it's hooked up. Grr. But whatever. It's not the end of the world. Just a small annoyance. An annoyance I need to wear from Wednesday to Friday every other week.

I did manage to act pretty normal with it on. I even played Wii Fit (Yes, I got home after 9 pm, but I had been on Benedryl and other sedatives and dozed away the first half of the day, and then was given a massive dose of steroids at 5pm. I was WIRED! Surgery or not, I was NOT going to sleep. I was told exercise was one of the best ways to keep away chemo side effects, so onto the balance board I went. I couldn't do any strength or yoga activities since I had an incision in my chest and all, but I did balance activities and a few mild aerobic ones.

I totally reached too far just as Mark snapped this pic. Stupid sore chest! But it shows off the tubing from the dressing in my chest-- this is the only view I had of the thing for the first 2 days. All taped up with the needle in it.
When I was doing the advanced seguey game, it goes up and down hills, and the way the view changes as you climb is a little dizzying. Well, I totally fell off the balance board! I didn't fall on my butt or anything-- I caught myself, but I was a few feet behind the board! I guess even though the steroids were masking it's effects, the benedryl was still at work in my system (It'll knock me right out in IV form!)

I went to bed pretty late the first night because of the steroids. Therefore, I slept late. The next day I actually felt pretty normal. SORE from the surgery, but I only took one oxycodone all day. Not bad. Other than the cold sensitivity, I had no side effects. I was supposed to take a steroid by mouth, but found that they had forgotten to give me a prescription for it and it wasn't in my bag of meds (I have 11 different prescription drugs to deal with chemo side effects!). By the time the nurse got it called in, it was too late to take it that day-- it would have kept me up all night. Well, I was up all night anyway. I just couldn't sleep! I finally passed out around 4. I was alone in the bed because Mark had a cold, so I sent him to the couch (It's not as mean as it sounds-- I have no ability to fight off infections and this is how I am *supposed* to deal with him being sick. Too bad it was too late and I got it anyway). So, I fell asleep around 4 am. But Mark's alarm from the day before went off at 5:30 am (he goes to a men's coffee group on Thursday mornings). And as soon as I woke up and turned it off, the heartburn hit. Count with me, I had 1.5 hours of sleep at this point. From then on, I had to stay vertical! Heartburn progressed. I drugged it. It brought on horrible nausea. I puked. Took a second nausea drug. Then Ativan (anti-anxiety sleepy-making, nausea-controlling drug). I propped myself up with every pillow I could find and passed out sitting up. 2 hours later, I woke up after sliding down a little. Heartburn was BACK. And this time, no drugs were touching it. I puked AGAIN. I took all of my anti-nausea drugs (I have 3 I was allowed to take at this point). Nausea was moderately controlled, but the heartburn was RAGING! If I reclined even a little, it brought waves of nausea on top of the chest pain. EVEN with all those nausea drugs! I called the nurse to ask if I had to take the steroid. I didn't get my usual nurse, and her sub acted like steroids don't cause heartburn. I told her yes they do-- that's why I have prescription meds from the last steroids I was on. So she told me to take them-- Uh, I already did!. Finally, she said I didn't need to take the steroid (supposed to prevent nausea-- um, no, it's CAUSING it! If I thought Prednisone was evil, Decadron is from the devil! My mom agreed that it's POWERFUL nasty!). Finally, they told me to come in early for my disconnect (ended up being right on time between their busyness and several accidents on the freeway) and they gave me fluids (between the puking and not being able to eat/drink around the heartburn, I was a little dehydrated) and Zantac and Aloxi for the heartburn and nausea. After the drugs, I could recline and relax while I waited for the fluids to finish (they take 2 hours! HUGE bag). I had mild heartburn and nausea the next day, but they were controllable with oral drugs. The chemo nurse said I could probably get the Decadron (steroids) removed from my meds from here on out. There's no point since it was causing the side effect it was supposed to prevent.

I went home and felt SO TIRED. Yes I had only gotten 3.5 hours of sleep, but this was worse than just tired. This was the chemo fatigue-- blood counts were dropping. Yay for drugs that kill your blood cells! I went to bed and slept and slept and slept. I woke up to snow, helped Mark dress the kids to go out in it (our first time messing with winter gear in over 2 years!!) then collapsed on the couch. I just sat there for 20 minutes-- so tired. Of course, after 3 days without showering, I HAD to change my bag. And it has to be done on an empty stomach, first thing in the morning (if you're wondering why, putting food into the top end of your digestive system will start it moving. You don't want that while changing things out. In fact, I have to force down 5 large marshmallows on an empty stomach because something in them temporarily shuts down the intestines. No one knows why. But I can tell you that after eating that many of them on an empty stomach-- especially one that is queasy from chemo-- I have no desire to eat them as a treat ever again!). So I showered and changed out the bag, dried my hair, dressed, at breakfast, and then donned all of my winter gear. This was a little scary. I didn't know how I would do with the cold sensitivity. But the kids were at the park sledding and this could be the only snow we got all year (Seattle just doesn't get much-- Usually). I made it the two blocks to the park (luckily the air was okay to breath!) and joined the kids on the hill. I went down twice-- once with each kid, and took pics of Mark sledding too.

Then I went home. 10 minutes was enough. Took Stasi with me too. Her mitts got wet and fell off early on, poor girl! Mark kept Kaed for another 20 minutes or so. I didn't really notice the cold sensitivity until I was helping him take off his boots and got some snow on my bare hand. OWW! I yelled that time. It was the first time I REALLY felt it.

As soon as I came in from sledding, the fatigue hit hard. I peeled off my outer wear and went straight to bed and slept away the day. I hardly had trouble falling asleep that night either-- only took about an hour of lying there (sleep? At night? Not anymore!). I really wanted to go to church, but when I woke up in the morning, I didn't really *wake up*. I bumbled around and helped dress the kids. Once they were in the car, I crawled back into bed. I wasn't sleepy, but I couldn't move, so I goofed around online. I fell asleep right around the time Mark and the kids got home from church. I didn't really see the kids at all that day! I woke up in time to help put them to bed. Then, while I was on the phone with my brother that night, I finally *woke up*. 9 pm and suddenly I could think straight and I didn't want to be horizontal. (I was on the phone with my mom a little earlier and she kept telling me to go down and play with the kids. She would ask if I was sitting up-- I kept getting dizzy when I tried to stand up, but I couldn't sit up long enough for the dizziness to go away-- I kept accidentally lying down again. SOOOO fatigued and then suddenly it lifted.

But what happens when you've slept for 2 days then wake up? You stay up all night. I finally was able to sleep around 5 am. Then slept till noon. Monday I felt tired, but could function. Played with the kids in the afternoon. Tried to sleep that night, but couldn't. I took and Ativan around 2 am and finally fell asleep at 3. Slept till noon.

That was yesterday. There was a huge storm forcast for today. Huge meaning 6-10" of snow. Doesn't sound like much, but in a city that has almost no flat roads, and some that rival San Francisco (usually shorter stretches, but equally steep!), and also has NO plows! (actually, I think there may be 2 or 3), but not enough to DO anything! Snow means the whole city shuts down. Schools have been closed all week-- well, no buses or preschool on Tuesday-- regular classes still ran. Anyway, with this "storm" on the way, I knew I had to run some errands. I thought I could wait until the worst of the snow melted, but there was more coming-- clearly I needed to go sometime, and I knew it wouldn't be safe today. I plotted a route that involved the flatest streets to get to the closest stores that would do and set out (no kids-- Mark's parents were with them yesterday. I wouldn't have risked my first time driving in snow in 8 years with my kids in the car!) I only had trouble stopping once-- was going a little fast and and there was a pretty deep slushy spot right in front of the stop sign. Other than that I did okay. Got what I needed (including a snow shovel-- I thought there was one mixed in with all the yard care stuff the landlord left in the garage, but nope), did a little extra shopping and mall wandering. I hadn't been out other than chemo for over a week. It was nice to feel "normal" for a few hours. I even found fluffy warm socks and a earflap hat with little bear-like ears on it on clearance! I love clearance! I didn't have a good close-fitting hat, so I was glad to find such a cute one. We went to Bible study last night too. My most normal day since chemo started! Until my nose started dripping. A cold. Arg! Or maybe just allergies? Our friends got new cats and I'm pretty allergic. Either way, my nose was POURING and I couldn't sleep until 5.

Today I woke up to snow everywhere. It all fell in the morning while I was sleeping-- I woke up around 1! (well, it continued to dust snow all day-- you had to really look hard to see it falling though). Mark was working from home again. The experience on the bus yesterday wasn't pleasant and they aren't even running in our neighbourhood. I wasn't packing up the kids to drive him 10 blocks to the transit station. Especially since I was still asleep! Around 2 I asked him to take a "lunch break" to take the kids out in the snow since I knew I couldn't handle it with my cold. It turned into a 2 hour break and he shoveled half the driveway (It wrecks our transmission so park on the road-- so it was mostly just a walkway). He had to keep working pretty late into the evening, but it was worth it. I even joined them for about 10 minutes and took pics until my fingers started to kill me. Stupid cold sensitivity-- I was wearing mittens and the temp was above freezing!

I came in and made chicken soup (not as good from boxed broth as from homemade stock, but whatever) and listened to a live webinar on depression in cancer patients. Not any new info, but the chat with my online support group afterwards was good (that's how I've come to think of the people who frequent the chat room on the Colon Cancer Alliance site. Then baby bedtime.

And that's pretty much been my week. I've done a little writing the last three days since my brain "woke up" again. Yup, that's really all I did all week. Oh, 2 nights ago Mark and I did Wii Fit and then played a round of races on Mario Kart. That was fun. Yes, that's an *event* in my life right now. That is sad. But that is chemo. Welcome to the new normal. (wow, I've been working on this post for over 3 hours!!!)

NaNo day 8

nessabutterfly — Wed, 09 Nov 2011 09:25:32 GMT

Well, I actually did most of my writing before midnight today! 3000-ish words of it! I'm at 47% now! Yay. My goal was to hit 50% before surgery, so that's 3% to go tomorrow. 1642 words. About an hour and a half of writing. That sounds easy, but my mom is coming in at noon tomorrow and I know she's not going to see this as a priority. Also, it's just going to be a generally chaotic day. I don't need to *do* anything before the surgery other than stop eating at midnight. Still, I know she'll send me to bed early so I'm rested. And we'll be together from the time she arrives-- no writing will happen after I leave to pick her up. And if she has her way, I won't be doing much after the surgery either. I have to convince her that it's a priority. We'll see how things go in the hospital. I might be in so much pain that I'm keeping the morphine pump going constantly. Or I might be up to writing. It's impossible to know until I'm there and experiencing it.

Okay, enough talk about surgery-- lets talk about my novel.

Prince Kier has fallen hard for Taylor. A little too hard. Hmm... Gotta rein him in a little. Taylor is still pretty reserved about him, but she's giving in. I'm only about 1/4 of the way through my plot, but I'm nearly at the halfway point on my words. Looks like this is going to be a 100,000 word novel! And I probably won't finish it this month-- probably not this year!

23358 / 50000 words. 47% done!

Let's see what they did today, shall we?

Taylor paused, surprised at the vividness of memories she was experiencing. Memories she had never dreamed about. She wasn't sure where they came from, but as she searched her mind, she realized that she was slowly gaining access to the full memory of Princess Taylor: the princess that didn't even exist until she had created her four weeks ago as a class assignment.

NaNo day 7.

nessabutterfly — Tue, 08 Nov 2011 08:37:57 GMT

at 19,732 words. I wanted to get to 20,000 before I went to bed, but it's just not happening. I keep falling asleep.

I went to the Northwest Christian Writer's Assosciation meeting tonight. It was good. But on top of meeting my ostomy nurse and organizing my pantry and kitchen cabinets, I'm worn out. I was up stupidly late last night and can't do it again. Even with a nap today, I'm toasted.

Maybe I'll wake up before the kids in the morning. Maybe. Too tired to find a quote.

Edit: Brushing my teeth woke me up just enough to get in those extra 300 words!

20043 / 50000 words. 40% done!

Have a quote:

Taylor stood in her sewing room, her shift lying on the floor at her feet and the other layers of her dress laid neatly across her work table. She was naked. And confused. And so tired that she could barely stand.

Nano day 6

nessabutterfly — Mon, 07 Nov 2011 11:43:09 GMT

It's LATE. I am TIRED! My daily word counts are totally screwed up since MOST of my writing is happening after midnight the last few days. But I'm still counting it as the day before until I have slept. So my personal daily word count is NOT matching up with what the NaNo site records. Who cares. 90% of this was written and recorded on day 7, but I'm still saying day 6. So there!

Anyway, I'm getting there. I didn't write much yesterday (as in on Nov 6th). I only put in like an hour of time within the midnight to midnight period. Just a little over 1000 words. But who cares. I'm still (just barely) set to finish within 20 days. That's good enough. As long as I finish. My head start is GONE, and my novel won't be finished, but I'll get my words in.

18300 / 50000 words. 37% done!

Taylor finally met her Prince, who has been named Prince Kier of the house of Kentington. Yup, totally stole (and misspelled) Kaedmon's middle name. Taylor share's Anastasia's middle name, so it was only fair. The boy is getting ahead of me though-- he's totally falling for her too fast! Slow down boy! That's what I get for not looking at my outline. Oh well, whatever. Let's find something quotable...

“I'll be as ill-bred as I can manage if it will give you joy,” she risked with a teasing look. She was rewarded with a wide grin that spread across the prince's face.

“Only if I can do the same,” he demanded with mock-severity.

NaNo day 5

nessabutterfly — Sun, 06 Nov 2011 09:35:55 GMT

15 K. YAY!! I had kinda wanted to be there by yesterday, but oh well, I'm still perfectly on track to finish within the 20 days I have allotted myself. And chances are I'll need less than 10 days to get back to writing after surgery.

I'm excited about the story though-- Taylor finally finished her dress and made it to the magical world (which still needs a name BTW, two actually-- Her tiny home Kingdom that's about to be stamped out by war, and the much larger England-like Kingdom where most of the story will take place. Suggestions are welcome).

15317 / 50000 words. 31% done!

Now for a quote:

Taylor reflected back on the conversation and wondered about her teacher's reaction. She seemed to take the dreams as seriously as Taylor did herself, but she had also been concerned. Well, who wouldn't? It did sound a little mentally unstable, didn't it? Or obsessive at the very least. Yet, she didn't feel obsessed, just... attached.

NaNo day 4

nessabutterfly — Sat, 05 Nov 2011 05:49:05 GMT

No writing today. I suck. Too tired. I did take baby girl shopping though. We like shopping.

I hope to wake up at 6 am and write until the babies roll out of bed at 9 (I hope it's not before 9 anyway).

Sleep now.

Next morning: It's 10 am. I just woke up. Shoot.

NaNo day 3

nessabutterfly — Fri, 04 Nov 2011 09:24:38 GMT

Today was a lazy day. After writing until 1:30 am yesterday, and then goofing around until about 4, I was TIRED. I did nothing all day. And then I napped.

I finally got the baby to bed at 10pm (cause she napped too), and started writing around 11 (yup, even more internet messing around before I finally shut off Chrome!). I got up to 9000-ish words by midnight (I remembered to stop and input my word count at 11:55!) and then hit 11,094 a little after 1am. At that point, I suddenly felt tired and decided to stop (of course, who's been up for yet another hour since then? Oh, that would be stupid. I mean, me.)

Anyway, here's my little progress bar thinger...

11094 / 50000 words. 22% done!

22% Yay me!! Almost a quarter!

I'm really liking my story. And I'm definitely less than a quarter of the way into my plot (plus I know I need to add more detail and dialogue to what I've already written), so there's not really any worry about me running out of story to write. Feeling good. Yup, feeling good.

Oh, what's that? You want a line from what I wrote today? Hmm....

For the first time, Taylor wanted to wake up from the dream. She closed her eyes and tried to force the princess to drift off to sleep, but it didn't work. She just continued to stare out of the window.

Nano day 2

nessabutterfly — Thu, 03 Nov 2011 09:00:17 GMT

I got a late start to my writing today. The good writing time I got yesterday morning was taken up by book club today. Then medical junk (both mine and that of a family member) got in the way of time I thought I would be writing later in the day. I finally got started when my daughter went out for her half-birthday dinner date with her daddy (you get an icon of the little cutie in honour of her day!). Well, no, I still putzed around online for an hour before I finally shut my browser.

So I started at 8 pm. With an hour break for one of those medical issues and another half hour for half-birthday cake. I gave up on writing just after 1 am, which means I got in a solid (well, solid after you take out the interruptions?) 3.5 hours of writing. But I wrote 4419 words in that time. Better than yesterday which was a solid hour, then 2 interrupted hours, then 8 hours of pointlessly trying to concentrate. Moral of the day-- shut Chrome!

Anyway, here's my handy little bar chart thing.

8018 / 50000 words. 16% done!

I would attempt to figure out how to link to the stats thing on the NaNo site (I've seen it done, so I know it's possible), but since I posted my word count after midnight, it's not accurate. Those are day two words. I was falling asleep writing, so only the last 500 or so were actually written today.

Anyway, here's my quote of the day. It's a full paragraph, but I like it. I didn't really expect Taylor's mom to play much of a role in the story, so this surprised me a little. In a good way (I keep being surprised by moms making unexpected appearances in my stories-- weird)

“Mother,” she cried out in the voice of her own childhood. The woman dropped the basket and scooped Taylor up into her arms, spinning her around until they both fell into the grass in happy exhaustion. Lying together, they gazed at the lazy clouds overhead, talking about the everyday affairs of life. Much of the conversation was coloured by the royal life they led, but occasionally the words echoed conversations Taylor and her own mother had had in the past. Rolling onto her side, she laid her head on her mother's shoulder and curled into her. “Don't ever leave me, mother,” she whispered.

Nano word count for the day

nessabutterfly — Tue, 01 Nov 2011 23:44:13 GMT

Well, I made pretty good progress today. Just about 3 chapters. And over 3000 words. Double the word count you need to get to in order to finish in 30 days. But I'm counting mine as 20 days because I doubt I'll get much done in the hospital. I wanted to get double my word count every day for the first week, but I guess double the standard count is good enough, right?

The kids started driving me nuts and I started procrastinating. I did pretty well in the early morning. No such luck tomorrow morning though-- I have book club. Maybe the kids will nap?

Someone posted this neat little progress bar thing.

So, ta-da. My progress.

3578 / 50000 words. 7% done!

And I'll pull out a line or two from what I wrote... Hmm....

“You sew like a dream,” she said to the machine with an affectionate pat. Then as her hand rested on the detailed art, she corrected, “No, more like a fairytale. I think I'll call you Aine. Yes, that feels right.”

I wrote a chapter!!

nessabutterfly — Tue, 01 Nov 2011 14:23:09 GMT

50 minutes in and I'm at 1172 words. If I take out the week I'll be in the hospital, I need 2174 words a day to hit my 50,000. That means I just need 1000 more words today (no problem!). I'm actually aiming for 3000-4000 words every day this week, just to get me ahead. I'm not sure how easy it'll be to write after the surgery since I won't have a lap to put my laptop in!

Okay, I've had my half hour break. Back at it!!

NaNoWriMo

nessabutterfly — Tue, 01 Nov 2011 04:47:19 GMT

So, I tried this once before, but this year I'm serious about it. I am doing NaNoWriMo. (If you didn't know, it's a crazy challenge that involves writing a 50,000+ word novel in the 30 days of November. It stands for National Novel Writing Month) I have a plot and an outline. I am signed up. If I take out the week I'll be in the hospital, I only need to write 2174 words a day. That's still doable. Especially with an outlined story that I like! I have to start out strong though. I would like to be half-way through by the time I go into the hospital. Seems crazy, but maybe doable? 25,000 words in 10 days? I'll have more time after the surgery, but I think it'll be harder to write just because of being able to hold the laptop.

Anyway, here's my basic story concept: Taylor,a fashion student, discovers that any costume she makes with a magical sewing machine will transport her into a fantasy world. There, she is a princess and falls in love with a prince, but she can only be there while wearing the costume. They have to find a way to permanently live in the same world. Still needs a villain.

I'll try to update with an excerpt every few days. We'll see if that really happens though!

Anyway, it's just over 2 hours until start time. I wrote my outline 2 months ago, so I'm going to read over it to refresh myself, and maybe nail down a few details. Like, I dunno... the prince's name. Or finding myself a villain.

Wish me luck in my crazy venture!

Sailor Moon Land

nessabutterfly — Wed, 28 Sep 2011 00:33:11 GMT

So, I joined this community about a month ago, and it's LOTS of fun! It's a battle style community (you're sorted into one of 3 teams) and every week there are new challenges: graphics, writing, puzzles, etc. The points you earn in the activities are combined with your team's points to get the overall score.

Anyway, it's a lot of fun, and you don't even need to know a lot about Sailor Moon to do it (or be a good writer or graphics maker-- I suck at graphics). You can participate as much or as little as you want (if you don't want to participate in 4 challenges a month, you can be a social member).

Anyway, check it out and come play. http://sailormoonland.livejournal.com/profile

writing challenge-- On your Mark, Get Set, GO!

nessabutterfly — Fri, 16 Sep 2011 23:25:23 GMT

Okay, so I got distracted and never finished posting the writing challenge. Here are the prompts. Match # 1 to #1 on your list and so on. If you have only 5 on your list, just start over and write 2 prompts for each fandom (#6 to #1, 7 to 2 and so on. And no cheating and swapping the order :)

Okay-- I picked 16 words from a random word generator (that I thought would work for any fandom in any time period-- tried to keep modern objects that could get in the way of a historical setting out of the mix). I'm about to draw 10 of them out of a pitcher at random.

Drumroll, please...

1. Quest
2. Protect
3. borrow
4. mirror
5. corruption
6. window
7. stretch
8. creation
9. apathy
10. raw

And you get one "get out of jail free" word. If one of the matches is just IMPOSSIBLE to write for whatever reason, you may substitute it with this word: "Inheritance"

So you got 11 words.

Here's the matches with my fandoms:

1. The Last Unicorn -- Quest (haha, that fits way too well-- almost kinda boring)
2. Strawberry Shortcake -- Protect
3. Lois and Clark: The New Adventures of Superman -- borrow
4. Doctor Who -- mirror
5. D.N. Angel -- corruption
6. V.B.Rose -- window
7. Tail of the Moon -- stretch
8. Saiunkoku Monagatari -- creation
9. Gakuen Alice --apathy
10. Rainbow Brite --raw

Share your matches in the comments if you like

writing challenge-- On your Mark, Get Set...

nessabutterfly — Fri, 09 Sep 2011 22:25:25 GMT

So, for those interested in doing the writing challenge that I came up with, here's your first step:

List 5-10 fandoms you are interested in. It doesn't matter if you have never written fanfiction for them before (in fact, it might be better if you haven't--at least not in large quantities-- this is about stretching yourself).

List off your fandoms and post them here in a comment. Then I'll give you 10 prompts (you don't have to do them all if it's too much). You match the first prompt to your first fandom, second to second and so on.

Post them somewhere public and leave a link to them here (or post them directly in the comments if you like) If you're looking for a good place to post them, www.fanfiction.net is a good host site for writing and you'll get lots of feedback there. Reviews are fun :)

Here are my fandoms for this challenge:
1. The Last Unicorn
2. Strawberry Shortcake
3. Lois and Clark: The New Adventures of Superman
4. Doctor Who
5. D.N. Angel
6. V.B.Rose
7. Tail of the Moon
8. Saiunkoku Monagatari
9. Gakuen Alice
10. Rainbow Brite

I totally pulled those out of thin air right this second. Don't think too much about it-- just pick stuff you love.

When I post the prompts, I'll draw them randomly so that I have no idea which ones will end up with which fandoms. Gives me almost the same experience as the rest of you.

Now I'm curious to see what fandoms everyone else will post.

Are you a writer?

nessabutterfly — Wed, 07 Sep 2011 02:00:10 GMT

I know a lot of you are writers, but leave me a comment if you're interested in participating in a fun (quick) new writing challenge I came up with. I think it would be more fun to do with a few people. It's not group writing though-- just encouragement from the group.

Even if you've never written before, but you want to give it a try, join in! Let any of your friends know if they think it will be fun-- I'll make any posts about this public.

Kaedmon's Forest room is FINISHED!

nessabutterfly — Wed, 05 May 2010 17:20:49 GMT

It took more than a week, but it's finished. (I just didn't realize I hadn't posted pics)

The room without the furniture:

Now the furniture is in!

Kaedmon's reaction when he first saw the finished room!

forest creatures

dragons on the bed (the quilt was in the laundry)

little sister likes it too!

waking up after his first full night in his new room

Beach Cosplay!!

nessabutterfly — Fri, 02 Oct 2009 17:10:11 GMT

Baka Rose Cosplay is hosting a beach cosplay day at New Smyrna beach from 11am until approx. 2pm on Saturday Nov 21!

We have one experienced photographer who has already committed to the event, and another who will probably attend as well.

Come in a costume you'd love to get beach shots in, either a swimsuit cosplay or a regular costume that suits the beach.

Bring a picnic lunch or if anyone is interested, we can plan a pot-luck.

Come on out-- It'll be a Splash!

If you're on cosplay.com, come join the thread: http://www.cosplay.com/showthread.php?t=192126

Vote for me!

nessabutterfly — Thu, 01 Oct 2009 21:28:30 GMT

So, I endered my first ACP costume contest.

http://www.acparadise.com/acp/contests.php?cid=37&t=1

It's for my Shuurei costume from Saiunkoku Monagatari. I'm really proud of certain aspects of this costume (the wig :) Also, the top 2 entries will win the full first season of the anime. It's one of my favourites, but I only have the first 2 disks (anime is expensive!)

6 random voters will be chosen to win either the entire series or a calendar as well. Will you vote?

If you have an account and you like my costume, then hop over and vote please. If you don't have an account, it only takes a few minutes (and it's free!) Of course, if you prefer a different costume, you're certainly free to vote for that one instead.

I guess you knew it was coming...

nessabutterfly — Fri, 17 Jul 2009 18:39:44 GMT

I just did a HUGE friend cut--more is probably coming. It's nothing against anyone I cut or will cut. I just don't have the time to be online much now. You've no doubt noticed my absence, so you realize you won't be missing much. It takes hours just to scan over a few days worth of my friends list and I'm missing so many posts that the ones I do read don't make much sense. Maybe someday I'll have time to come around again and add some of you back.

I might make the occasional public post just to let you know I'm still alive...

Baby Anastasia's wish list.

nessabutterfly — Tue, 17 Feb 2009 18:00:04 GMT

I've started to have people ask me about what we need for the baby. Now that I've gone through what I have from Kaedmon, and what we bought/received before we knew he was a boy, I have a list of what we need and what we don't.

This is NOT me asking for gifts. It's merely me putting the list somewhere accessible to those who have asked, and also, somewhere I won't lose it. There's no point in making a registry since there's only one specific item on the whole list.

Baby needs: Only feminine items-- we have lots of neutrals already

What we need:

- Graco infant carseat in Birkshire ( http://www.toysrus.com/product/index.jsp?productId=2844620 )
- Hooded towels and robe
- Shoes: sizes 3 and up
- Hats, bonnets, hair bows
- Bibs

- Clothes:

Newborn (summer weight):
- day clothes (dresses, rompers, onesies, light sweaters, etc.)

0-3 months (summer weight):
- Sleepers (not nightgowns)
- day clothes (dresses, rompers, onesies, light sweaters, etc.)

3-6 months (summer, early fall)
- shorts/ skirts in pastels
- light sweaters

6-9 months (fall/winter)
- sleepers
- skirts/ pants (especially pastels)
- jacket
- tights/ leggings
- rompers

12 months +
- anything

What we don't need:
- Newborn nightgowns
- 3-6 month sized onesies or dresses
- 6-9 month sized long-sleeved shirts or sweaters
- bedding/ receiving blankets
- Most baby gear
- bottles/ feeding supplies
- 0-6 month size socks

The inevitable Friends Cut.

nessabutterfly — Tue, 02 Dec 2008 03:15:28 GMT

I've come to the conclusion that I need to do a Friends Cut.

This has nothing to do with disliking anyone. Just thought I needed to say that right off the bat. I'll be cutting a few communities that post a lot and I don't get a lot out of. Well, I won't likely be cutting the communities, just putting them on the not-watching list.

Mainly my problem is that I have no time. My life feels like it's spiraling out of control and I just don't have time for LiveJournal. But I can't stand letting go of it altogether. I'm very connected to my LJ. I think I'm going to start by cutting people I don't read very often and find myself skimming. It doesn't mean I have anything against you if I cut you, just that what you post about isn't really where I'm at right now and I don't feel particularily close to you.

See, I have some friends who's posts don't really resonate with where I'm at right now, but we've developed a friendship-- I won't cut you. There are other people I'm not that close to, but they post things that interest me-- I may or may not cut you. Then there are people who have been on my list for a short time-- unless you've annoyed me, you get to stay for now so I can see if you're really worth keeping around. Some of you added me a lot earlier than I added you (lack of perception skills here!) so I wanna give you a chance.

Anyway, I think it'll be a fairly minor cut to start with, and it won't likely help the issue that much, since some of the people who post a LOT are the ones I definately want to keep on.

For the last two or three months, I've been checking my journal once or twice a week, and I often have 15 or 20 pages of entries to go through in just a week's time. I feel like no one gets my full attention or a careful read of their posts. I'm spread too thin. Also, i end up ignoring my baby while I'm playing LJ catch-up, and that's not cool. I rarely end up posting about my own life because by the time I've spent 3-5 hours reading my F-list, I just don't care about posting anymore. And I want to post a little more. I've got a backlog of pics that friends are waiting for, and I'm about 3 weeks behind on house news (which I'll hopefully get to tonight).

I think I'll start cutting sometime tonight, and keep going for... oh, as long as it takes. If you get cut, or you think you might get cut, and you don't want to, drop me a comment. I might assure you that I had no intention of cutting you, I might change my mind if I was going to, or I might say goodbye if I find that there's not a deep enough relationship to sacrifice my family for. Cause that's what it comes down to-- am I spending time on LJ or with my boys?

I heart my serger!

nessabutterfly — Tue, 15 Jan 2008 18:07:58 GMT

Ok, I'm supposed to be working, not playing with LJ, but I had to stop to make this announcement to the entire world (or at least those who look at my journal).

If you sew, even a little bit, and you have the means, BUY A SERGER!! I just finished all the seams on the skirt of the dress I'm working on. OH MY GOODNESS!!! I've used it a little already to make a few Christmas presents, but I am AMAZED at how wonderful it finished these edges. I've worked a lot with Casa Satin. It's wonderful stuff but it FRAYS! Well, even gathered edges clean up perfectly.

Sorry for the rant, but I am seriously in love with this little hunk of metal and plastic!!