I Am A Wild Blue Beast

Bad Clams

2017-12-15T14:18:58Z

This is a trap, so hopefully all new spam comments will go to here.

Bad Math

2013-01-12T21:42:07Z

Quiz time: I was trying to read a building schematic yesterday, and there was an interior wall that was 7 3/8 inches long on the blueprint. In the upper-right corner of the page, it said 1/4" to 1'.

Question: how long is the wall in real life?

Answer: scroll down to see. Or, give the answer in the comments, along with an explanation of how you got it

The teacher gave out a one-page sheet "explaining" how to do the problem. Here is the entire method he wanted us to use (copied verbatim)

-------------------------------------------------------------------

Calculation 1
------------------
This calculation deals with the whole number measurement. In this example, the whole number is 7.

The formula is
4 feet x ____ = ____

Therefore, the calculation is
4 feet x 7 = 28

Calculation 2
------------------
Before presenting the calculation, here are some charts that the calculation will use:

Partial Measurement Translation
If the measurement equals Then the Actual Footage equals
1/2 inch = 24 inches or 2 feet
1/4 inch = 12 inches or 1 foot
1/8 inches = 6 inches or 1/2 foot
1/16 inches = 3 inches or 1/4 foot

Handy Guide
If the calculation result is Then the Actual Footage equals
12 inches = 1 foot
24 inches = 2 feet
36 inches = 3 feet

The formula is
1. Check the measurement for the partial number. In this example, the number is 3/8.
2. Check the Partial Measurement Translation for the amount that the bottom part of the fraction matches (denominator). In this example, the number is 8 and the chart says that 8 equals 6 inches.
3. Check the partial number for the top part of the fraction (numerator), In this example, the number is 3.
4. Multiply 6 (the chart translation for the bottom part of the fraction) by the top part of the fraction which is 3. The answer to 6 x 3 is 18 inches.
5. Check the Handy Guide. 18 inches is bigger than 12 inches but smaller than 24 inches. Therefore, the measurement equals 1 foot 6 inches or 1 1/2 feet (18-12 = 6 inches and the 12 inches = 1 foot)
6. Here is the calculation in numerical format:
a. Bolded Step 2 x Bolded Step 3 = Step 4. (6 x 3 = 18)
b. Handy Guide Smaller Number - Step 4 = A complete foot/feet measurement and a remainder.

Calculation 3
------------------
This calculation provides the final answer.

The formula is
Result of Calculation 1 + Whole Number Result of Calculation 2 + Remainder Result of Calculation 2

28+1+6 or 29 feet and 6 inches or it may be expressed as 29 and 1/2 feet.

-------------------------------------------------------------------

Rant: Are you kidding me?!?!?! Are you FRICKING KIDDING me? This is the way they teach kids to do math? I hope you realized that the whole problem is just multiplying 7 3/8 by 4.

Now, I understand that a lot of high school graduates may not be good at math and don't understand fractions. But judging from the above, I can understand how someone could develop a huge FEAR of mathematics. It definitely doesn't promote understanding the calculation. The instructor's answer took seven steps and TWO LOOK-UP TABLES! There is no reason that this problem should require two look-up tables.

It turns out talking to some construction workers that some guys keep a cheat sheet with their tools listing the most common wall lengths and how long they would be on a blueprint. Or, if something is 7 3/8", they just cut the wood at 28' and add "a little extra". But I can imagine with a foreman yelling at you and knowing any mistake could cost the company lots of money, the measurements could get really screwed up.

Maybe we should all try to go metric and then give everyone calculators.

Worst CD art of 2012

2012-12-27T17:21:18Z

How can a designer put this out? I realize CDs don't have the real estate of an LP anymore... but these examples are just huge wastes of space.

Best CD art for 2012

2012-12-27T17:10:59Z

Here is the best CD art of 2012 (in my opinion)! And it's not just the cover... most of these CDs had beautiful liner notes, inserts, and even CD tray art!

P-town

2012-07-05T18:37:10Z

Thor and I are going to Provincetown, Massachusetts next week (Wednesday, July 11 through Monday, July 16). Is anybody else going to be there for "bear week"? Want to meet up for a drink or a slice of pizza at Spiritus?

"Homo/Hetero: The Struggle for Sexual Identity" by Joseph Epstein

2012-03-19T20:30:21Z

I was reminded of this essay from ~~then-editor~~ Joseph Epstein in Harper's Magazine:

"If I had the power to do so, I would wish homosexuality off the face of this earth. I would do so because I think that it brings infinitely more pain than pleasure to those who are forced to live with it; because I think there is no resolution for this pain in our lifetime, only, for the overwhelming majority of homosexuals, more pain and various degrees of exacerbating adjustment; and because, wholly selfishly, I find myself completely incapable of coming to turns with it...

They are different front the rest of us. Homosexuals are different, moreover, in a way that cuts deeper than other kinds of human differences—religious, class, racial—in a way that is, somehow, more fundamental. Cursed without clear cause, afflicted without apparent cure, they are an affront to our rationality, living evidence of our despair of ever finding a sensible, an explainable, design to the world. One can tolerate homosexuality, a small enough price to be asked to pay for someone else's pain, but accepting it, really accepting it, is another thing altogether. I find I can accept it least of all when I look at my children. There is much my four sons can do in their lives that might cause me anguish, that might outrage me, that might make me ashamed of them and of myself as their father. But nothing they could ever do would make me sadder than if any of them were to become homosexual. For then I should know them condemned to a state of permanent niggerdom among men, their lives, whatever adjustment they might make to their condition, to be lived out as part of the pain of the earth."

I scanned in the rest of the article, and posted it on my website. Though Harper's was flooded with letters to the editor in subsequent issues (even up to the 1980s), the author Joseph Epstein never disavowed the article. If anything, he doubled down in a 2002 follow-up, claiming that people who called him a homophobe weren't capable of "textured thought".

Commented Without Post

2012-02-16T14:17:37Z

Pounding the Skins

2012-01-28T05:12:58Z

I saw the rock group Cowboy Mouth tonight. Here are some photos of the lead singer/guitarist/drummer (!) Fred LeBlanc that I found on online:

I'm going to make a rabbit with extra ears

2012-01-22T01:34:37Z

What a wonderful world we live in, now that it's the future

Ticket Bastards

2012-01-18T17:46:43Z

Dammit! I took time out of my vacation to buy tickets for Coachella Friday morning. They had an awful website, and the terrible wi-fi at the hotel was giving me time-outs and 404 errors. But my VISA company said a $336 charge went through, so I didn't worry. But this morning I called the ticket site to verify, and they said I DON'T have tickets, and now they're all sold out. So, no Coachella for me - I think TicketMaster and all these bootleg reseller sites (eBay, StubHub, TicketExchange) are a huge rip-off.

Disney-fication

2012-01-10T16:26:04Z

The bear community now has a bad genre rapper! I am so proud.

More information can be found here, in case you're interested.

I need a pharmacist! Pronto!

2012-01-03T15:51:26Z

Last week, I went and saw Ted Leo and the Pharmacists... a local punk band. Ted Leo was in fine voice, singing his crafty little pop punk songs. But my heart went out to Chris Wilson on drums. The guy looks the a cross between an Allman brother, Mick Fleetwood, and animal the muppet drummer. Above is my bad iPhone photo, but check the cut below to see more of his beardy goodness

Patrick Kellogg's New Years Resolutions for 2012

2012-01-02T22:47:28Z

Here are my New Years Resolutions for 2012
---------------------------
Start a charitable trust
Work on Sonic restaurants
Fix my bad back
Go to Further Confusion
Go to Coachella again
Join gay hockey team as full-time player
Practice with Gotham Knights rugby
Volunteer at MoMATH for opening
Volunteer at GLBT Center
Clean up a beach (maybe Gowanus Canal?)
Be more political
Go to a dude ranch
Go to Iceland
Go to SxSW
Learn to sew
Ride a horse
Find a farm to work on
Find purpose in life/ reason to wake up in the morning
Stop fighting with Thor
Play more

And here are some New Years resolutions from previous years that I never got around to
---------------------------
Do civil war reenacting
Read Marcel Proust
Read War And Peace
Read Moby Dick
Read Don Quixote
Do the Navy Seal Challenge
Learn French
Learn Italian
Learn Japanese
Go back to school
Go skydiving
Go to Australia (Sydney and Alice Springs)
Go on a diving vacation
Go prospecting
Try geocaching
Learn boxing
Get a buckle in rodeo
Take Thor
Attend smokejumper school
Go to a shooting range
Go ATV mudding
Buy an ATV
Get a massage
Learn how to give a massage
Find more good recipes
Eat better
Do an entire weekend
Cultivate local friends that can be invited over for game nights, movie nights, and cigar & poker nights
Buy a gun
Take shooting classes
Go hunting
Organize a hunting trip
Get a concealed carry permit
Record a multi-track song on computer
Visit a slaughterhouse
Get a motorcycle license
Leave to dive: scuba certification for both wetsuit and drysuit
Take mining classes at the Colorado School of Mines
Join the police citizen's brigade
Go whitewater rafting
Go caving
Start sword fighting again
Learn the butterfly stroke
Play three of my own guitar songs at an "open mic" night
Learn to unicycle
Start painting
Finish programming projects
Don't eat right before bedtime2

Best and Worst Movies of the Year

2011-12-30T17:43:12Z

Here are my favorite movies of the year. However, the list is incomplete, because I haven't seen everything. Who knows? Alvin and the Chipmunks: Chipwrecked may turn out to be my favorite movie of all time. I'm lucky because I live in New York City, and I get to see things before they come out to the rest of the country. But don't be jealous - think of us as an early warning system.

Ten Best Movies of 2011
-----------------------------------
1. Midnight In Paris
2. Hugo
3. Red
4. Rango
5. Four Lions
6. Crazy, Stupid, Love
7. A Very Harold & Kumar 3D Christmas
8. The Lincoln Lawyer
9. Winnie The Pooh
10. Cave Of Forgotten Dreams

Trollhunter
The Adjustment Bureau
The Illusionist
Weekend
The Muppets
Drive
Win Win
Hanna
Super 8
Buried
Source Code
Death Race 2
The Green Hornet
GasLand
Waste Land
Puss In Boots
Real Steel
Monsters

Movies I haven't seen yet... who knows, they could be great!
-----------------
Another Earth
The Girl With The Dragon Tattoo (2011)
The Artist
The Descendants
Beginners
Submarine
Martha Marcy May Marlene
The Future
War Horse
Sherlock Holmes: A Game Of Shadows
Young Adult
Tinker Tailor Soldier Spy
Film Socialisme
Tabloid
The Skin I Live In
Meek's Cutoff
Carnage
Into The Abyss
The Beaver
Like Crazy
Friends With Benefits
Being Elmo: A Puppeteer’s Journey
Melancholia
Super
Rubber
50/50
Insidious
Contagion
Corialanus
Paradise Lost 3: Purgatory (all)
We Need To Talk About Kevin
Trespass
Beats, Rhymes & Life: The Travels Of A Tribe Called Quest
POM Wonderful Presents The Greatest Movie Ever Sold

Ten Worst Movies of 2011
-----------------------------------
1. The Expendables
2. Conan the Barbarian (2011)
3. Devil
4. Cool It
5. Green Lantern
6. Burlesque
7. Sucker Punch
8. The Sorcerer's Apprentice
9. Season Of The Witch
10. The Tree of Life

Battle: Los Angeles/ Skyline
Pirates of the Caribbean: On Stranger Tides
Cars 2
Alpha & Omega
Final Destination 5
The Hangover Part II
Dogtooth
Centurion
I Am Number Four
Uncle Boonmee Who Can Recall His Past Lives
Larry Crowne
Spy Kids: All The Time In The World in 4D
Cyrus
Due Date

Best Techno, Most Disappointing CDs of the Year, Best Art, etc.

2011-12-30T17:36:15Z

I used to make a list of the worst CD each year, but that wasn't really fair. It was just the worst CD I purchased and tried to listen to. So, I think I should rename the category to "the most disappointing CDs of the year". You really let me down. I know you can do better. look at my face. LOOK AT MY FACE! See the sad look in my eyes? That's because of you. Now my heart is breaking. I hope you try harder in the future.

Best Techno CDs of 2011
------------------------------------
1. Austra "Feel It Break"
2. James Blake "James Blake"
3. M83 "Hurry Up We're Sleeping"
4. Skrillex "Scary Monsters And Nice Sprites EP"
5. Diplo/Dave Nada "Blow Your Head" (volumes 1 and 2)
DJ Shadow "The Less You Know The Better"
Beastie Boys "Hot Sauce Committee Part 2"
The Rapture "In The Grace Of Your Love" Body Language "Social Studies"
Bassnectar "Cozza Frenzy"
Frankmusik "Do It In The AM"

Best CD Reissues of 2011
------------------------------------
1. Pink Floyd "Dark Side Of The Moon" and "Wish You Were Here" (Immersion editions)
Stephen Merrit "Obscurities"
Toad The Wet Sprocket "All You Want"
Chris Isaak "Beyond The Sun"
Sigur Rós "Inní"

Worst CDs of 2011
------------------------------------
1. Everclear "Return To Santa Monica"
2. Destroyer "Kaputt"
3. The Lonely Island "Turtleneck & Chain"
4. The Orb and David Gilmour "Metallic Spheres"
5. David Lynch "Crazy Clown Time"

Best CD Cover of 2011
------------------------------------
1. Battles "Gloss Drop"
The Felice Brothers "Celebration Florida"
My Morning Jacket "Circuital"
Manchester Orchesra "Simple Math"
Thomas Dolby "A Map Of The Floating City" (Deluxe)
TV On The Radio "Nine Types Of Light"
The Strokes "Angles"
Coldplay "Mylo Xyloto"
Mastodon "The Hunter"
Kasabian "Velociraptor!"

Worst CD Cover of 2011
------------------------------------
1. They Might Be Giants "Join Us"
Wilco "The Whole Love" (deluxe)
David Lynch "Crazy Clown Time"

Best CDs of the Year

2011-12-30T17:27:06Z

Who still buys CDs? I guess I still do. At the age of 42... I am old. I don't trust buying MP3s or any digital format. For example, whatever happened to Ogg Vorbis? Were they really serious about that?

After I "synced" with the Apple "cloud" last month, my music library turned into a mix of broken links, mis-named files, and missing songs. As a former UNIX junkie, I want to know what the files are named, where they are located, with a consistency of directory structure. Or, I could just press "play" and not worry about it.

Here are the top CDs I enjoyed this year:

1. Adele "21"
2. Mumford & Sons "Sign No More"
3. Death Cab For Cutie "Keys And Codes"
4. The Decemberists "The King Is Dead"
5. Low "C'mon"
6. Fountains Of Wayne "Sky Full Of Holes"
7. Paul Simon "So Beautiful Or So What"
8. Thomas Dolby "A Map Of The Floating City"
9. Tom Waits "Bad As Me"
10. Fucked Up "David Comes To Life"

Here are some other CDs that mere great, but didn't make it into the top 10 (in no particular order):

Bryan Ferry "Olympia"
Fleet Foxes "Helplessness Blues"
Radiohead "The King Of Limbs"
Wilco "The Whole Love"
Wild Flag "Wild Flag"
My Morning Jacket "Circuital"
Tune-Yards "Whokill"
Cage The Elephant "Thank You Happy Birthday"
R.E.M. "Collapse Into Now"
TV On The Radio "Nine Types Of Light"
Feist "Metals"
Bon Iver "Bon Iver"
Florence And The Machine "Ceremonials"
Panda Bear "Tomboy"
Mastodon "The Hunter"
Kele "The Boxer"
Kate Bush "50 Words For Snow"
Twin Shadow "Forget"
Kaiser Chiefs "Future Is Medieval"
Kasabian "Velociraptor"
Todd Snider "Live: The Storyteller"
Elbow "Build A Rocket Boys!"
TV On The Radio "Nine Times Of Light"
John Doe "Keeper"
Biffy Clyro "Only Revolutions"
Ryan Adams "Ashes & Fire"
fun. "Aim And Ignite"
The Strokes "Angles"
The Wombats "The Wombats Proudly Present... This Modern Glitch"
The Kooks "Junk Of The Heart"
OMD "History Of Modern"
Iron & Wine "Kiss Each other Clean"
Ivy "All Hours"
Bad Religion "The Dissent Of Man"
Man Man "Life Fantastic"
Ladytron "Gravity The Seducer"
Indigo Girls "Beauty Queen Sister"
The Felice Brothers "Celebration Florida"
Girls "Father, Son, Holy Ghost"
Mates Of State "Mountaintops"
Real Estate "Days"
British Sea Power "Valhalla Dancehall"
Manchester Orchesra "Simple Math"
Social Distortion "Hard Times and Nursery Rhymes"
DeVotchka "100 Lovers"

Also "chrias"

2011-12-23T19:14:13Z

Muppet Shop Boys

2011-11-23T00:17:33Z

Miss Piggy and Adam Lambert - separated at birth? I see the resemblance!

A Personal History of N' Tiss and Wubwubwub

2011-11-10T21:41:47Z

When I was a freshman in college in 1987, there was this weird record shop above a bar in the "Stadium Village" part of Minneapolis. They only sold import CDs of dance music. I imagine it was a forward-thinking student who went to Belgium and fell in love with the early version of techno.

Each CD was thirty dollars... an unheard-of amount when I was a college student. So, I only bought one. It wasn't very good, but I played the heck out of it. Here is what it looked like:

(Front cover)

(Back cover)

And here is a sample song, "Me My Dream" by the forgotten artist "Off"

BE MY DREAM - OFF

Sure, there was electronic music before 1988. In high school, I fell in love with Kraftwerk. "Computer World" had just come out, and my brother bought it on vinyl. I bought my own copy of "Electric Cafe" soon after. And a local IMAX movie theater played Alan Parson Project's "I Robot" before each movie, which wowed me, so I tried to find all the rock instrumentals I could: Vangelis, Tangerine Dream (still love the early stuff!), Tomita, and things on the Windham Hill label showcasing the then-new New Age movement.

But this music was different. It was louder, for a start. And you could dance to it. But unlike Giorgio Moroder's work (yay for the "Midnight Express" soundtrack!) this wasn't music for a disco. This was harsh and abrasive and weird, like the music they might play in a Blade Runner nightclub. My friends and I made mixtapes for each other. We discovered Front 242, and then Ministry. The really affluent ones bought import records and introduced us to "Charly" and "Strings Of Life" and "Clear". I did acid and listened to acid, too.

With the nineties around the corner, electronic music would explode, with rave music and Prodigy and a showcase on MTV. But for those two years in college, it felt like a secret experiment... a new world that only my friends and I were privilege to. I hope the current generation of kids are finding something unique and special to call their own. Because from my MP3 player, I'm not impressed by Bon Iver and Adele and Interpol and Animal Collective giving me that thrill of something I've never heard before.

Om Nom

2011-10-28T21:01:09Z

Here is a pumpkin I made. It's the character "Om Nom" from the videogame Cut The Rope. It's a fun game... but the character is adorable! And now he comes in a plush version from Thinkgeek.com. Feed him candy!

Il y a trente ans...

2011-10-26T05:39:06Z

What I learned from seeing Duran Duran in concert tonight:

Lead singer Simon Le Bon now looks EXACTLY like Wil Wheaton (Star Trek's Wesley Crusher)

Jiminy Cricket!

2011-10-13T00:39:52Z

Introducing...

2011-10-10T20:47:04Z

When Thor and I were in Durham, North Carolina last weekend, we went to an amusement park named Freddie's and they had one of those karaoke machines where you could record your own song. So. I present to you, "Thor and Mud" singing a cover song from the Talking Heads:

MP3: Thor And Mud - Wild Life by the Talking Heads

Posted Without Comment

2011-09-15T17:00:15Z

Melts in your mouth, not in mine

2011-08-05T22:19:20Z

nipperdawg told me that he tried to get a bad of custom M&Ms printed at the web site http://www.mymms.com/. He used a graphic of two guys kissing that was copied from a Tom of Finland piece that he liked. However, Mars Corp refused to print them.

So, I tried the idea myself using the graphic below. It's from a photo that liftinmoose found in a piece of graffiti street art in San Francisco. I liked it, and now I have three bags of candy that have that photo engraved on it! Thor likes to add M&Msto his special recipe of Chex Mix, and sometimes to popcorn. Yum!