In your satin tights, fighting for your rights...

Your favorite show..

melantha — Mon, 22 Nov 2010 17:13:17 GMT

Emails from my parents! (I would like to add that I have proof this predates Sh*t My Father Says)..this is from March.

Dad: My first Grandson, Master Liam Stuart Roberts Esquire, (pronounced Lee-am by the way) was born about an hour ago 21:00 + a few on March 17th in the year of our Lord 2010. He weighed 8 pounds 5 ounces (slot redfish size) and is said to be remarkably handsome.

I am aware that Michelle worked some and I am also aware that George contributed but the salient point is that I started the whole thing over thirty years ago so...... who's amazing here!

Mom: Excuse me, but shouldn't that be OUR grandson? I do somewhat remember you "starting" it all, but who actually gave birth to our Michi? And now she has given us another Stuart? I wonder if she's ready for that? :-)

Dad: If memory serves I was in labor for eight hours when she was finally born. Remember? It was at the end of my shift on the flight line. So ... And next, Jan is also a boy's name but she didn't pick that one did she? OH DOG EL!!!! You got told.

Mom: You forget. Diana (our VERY FIRST grandchild) is named Diana Lee, after ME (Janice Lee) and then Claire is named after Missy (Clarissa Ann, after Marissa Ann) who was actually named after my mother, Patricia Ann. So I think I have you beat, two grandkids to one!!! Hahahahaha! Sorry to tell you, it’s been a secret conspiracy with Michelle all along…

Dad: Jan's a big fat liar! Michelle, is there some reason why there are no photos? Tuckered out are ya? Maybe George's shutter finger is broken? Is that it?

Mom: What’s a shutter?

Dad: It's something I get whenever I talk to you. HA!

melantha — Mon, 24 May 2010 17:33:53 GMT

Because I was saving them, I've got another short one.

Me: George’s family is staying at the same place, so you don’t need to rent a car, you can just ride with them back and forth.

Dad: That's a great idea! Spend the whole friken day with a gaggle O' Lib's and then I get to commute with 'em too. Wow! You're really smart.

Me: Oh, my bad. Let me go reserve a nice, expensive, gas-guzzling car, and then you can pay for it with the wads of cash just falling out of your pockets all the time. I’ll get right on it.

Dad: Now Now Now! Lets not get hasty. I was just sayin.

(My brother joined in with what he wanted for Thanksgiving; he is still in Afghanistan. Dad started complaining about his job and wanted to go to Afghanistan on another job offer.)

Dad: Tony says that weight watchers is a condition of my employment. He says that he's going to get the instructors name and pay her to call him and let him know if I showed up and if I lost weight. It's OK though. I'm going to pay her more.

Matt: See, I knew it. What, are people saying you are too fat to work?

Dad: NO! Tony and Trish and the kids want me to loose weight.

Matt: Everyone wants that including your future grandkids, plus michelle is having a boy finally.

Dad: No shit. We must make every effort to insure the boy gets involved in the proper endeavors in life. None of that comic book crap.

Matt: It's going to be hard considering Michelle and George and where he is growing up.

Dad: A couple of well timed fishing and or hunting trips and the boy will be seduced by the correct side. He'll have the advantage of testosterone in his blood. That's what makes guys way smarter than women.

Matt: That's true. He does have 1/2 Burman blood, so that's good.

Dad: Hell, 1/4 is enough for greatness if proper influences are brought to bear.

Matt: I need you to make me some fudge, like at least 2 batches and send it over here.

Dad: In the first place, I don't remember the recipe and will have to get it from Tanna or Beth or Michelle. In the second place, I've recommitted to my WW diet program and you're asking me to spend an hour or two over a couple of simmering hot pan loads of "Mom's Special White Trash" fudge. Hey, you know what else would be a good idea? How about I test smoke a pack of Marlboro's for ya!

I have an idea. How about you involve Michelle and Tanna and Beth and maybe even that dumb broad I used to be chained to, or even that woman who mistreated you so badly as a child by making you drink out of the same hose that Johnny used to fill his pesticide tank with when you were a tired and thirsty little boy? See if you can get each of them to cook you up a batch and you can decide who's is best. They're all dopes anyway and you could just email them separately claiming that theirs was the best. Judy's has nuts! (Like that's a surprise). Heck, maybe we could even get Ethel to make some if you don't mind carrots in your fudge.

Mom chiming in: Matt, I will make you some fudge when you least expect it!

Dad: That's the most disgusting thing I've ever heard.

melantha — Mon, 24 May 2010 17:16:38 GMT

Okay, I know it's been a while...three kids and college are killing me, but here's another installment in EMAILS FROM MY PARENTS!

ME: I think that instead of continuously looking up blondes with big guns (a personal fetish of yours, I understand) you should perhaps see how to make it possible to visit your GRANDKIDS at Thanksgiving. I was just there in June; it’s your turn! I found the plane tickets for you and everything, you lazy dork.

Dad: I don't know. I think it's best to lay around and wait and think about it and ask questions and think about it some more and then wait till it gets closer to the point where there's almost no time left and then get all frantic and search wildly for non-existent flights and then come up with apologies. At least that's how I usually do it.

The other plan would be to at least go to Thursday's meeting involving where we're going next with the projects down here in order to have some idea as to where I'm going to be THREE MONTHS FROM NOW!!!! Doo-fuss! ........ Dorkus Shmorkus! ...... Mushy Brain! ......... Besides, I have to drive because I'm too fat for only one seat according to the new rules and I need two seats or four seats round trip. Miss bitchy tootoo! .....Miss I'm pregnant and miserable and want to whine ............ Miss I'm bored so I'll abuse my poor innocent always mild and wonderful father. ............ yea that's it.

Me: What? Is this some weird, unnatural new habit you’ve picked up, of actually getting information before you make a decision? WHO ARE YOU? You are not my father, you sick freak.

And because you are not him, as he would never actually consider outside input before he made a decision that would totally benefit himself, I feel no shame in mocking you incessantly. Mock. Mock mock.

Dad: MOCK!!! MOCK YOU SAY!!! Well, I'm dashed. And I AM him. He. Me! And I've gotten information before stuff in the past for your information Miss Smarty Underwear. You'll just have to actually keep the whole Thanksgiving thing with flights and such up in the air for a little while and on your list for a little longer. I can't leave for a whole week that's sure. Everyone else can but not me. I get to leave last and I have to be back first.

Don't worry. I have you penciled in for half an answer on or about Monday by 14:00.

Mom: Boy, you sure are bossy!

Just kidding, Michelle. I thought I would say it before your Dad got a chance! 

Dad: "Bossy" is a small word for what she is. Oh wait. My bad. I just counted and both words are exactly the same number of letters.

As for food, I'll eat anything. Any shellfish at all. Any shellfish with big meaty tails and claws. Any shellfish typically served with lemon and butter. Any shellfish whose name most usually starts with Maine and ends in bster.

Ya'll counted the number of letters in certain words didn't ya?

Mom: You are a butthead, you know that? Michi and I already talked about food and "obster" wasn't on the list. But turkey, dressing, deviled eggs, pecan pie, poke cake and more.

Dad: I'm dashed. I'm sure I have no idea from whence this slander is born. OK how about instead of (or in addition to) pecan pie you supply key lime pie. I don't know what "poke cake" is but it has a certain "porn" sound to it and I don't think I want to try it. (In front of anyone).

Mom: I hope Michelle has explained to her in-laws that we always talk this way! :-) Oh, I forgot. You talked this way when we were still married! Haha! While I was the sweet girl from the mountains.

Dad: It's true. You were from the mountains.

Mom: Key lime is easy to make. Are you bringing the key lime juice?

Dad: Just can't lay off the suggestive remarks can ya?

Mom: I am just going to ignore that remark. Did Michelle tell you that you are going to stay in the unfinished, cold, damp and musty basement? While I shall be upstairs staying in the beautiful library. Well, if the shoe fits….

Dad: Almost. The only exception is that when she tricked me into buying the airline ticket she didn't tell me you were coming so I'm staying in a hotel and she has to split it with me. A really expensive one too. One with a mini-bar. And a coffeemaker. And extra towels. She's going to call me whenever you go to Wal-Mart (which is most of the day) and that's the only time I have to visit.

Mom: Yes, but I will have two things you won’t. Diana and Claire! OK, since I will go shopping a teeny bit while I am there, I guess you can visit them then. IF they don’t go with me!

Dad: Oh yea! Well maybe you'd like to know that we're doing all the stupid stuff while you're there but as soon as you leave we're going on a specially arranged private midnight Wal-Mart shopping extravaganza with up to 50% off, and more. Plus for your information Miss Smarty Underwear, we didn't want to tell you but Michelle has finally lost her battle painintheassdaughter disease and is giving Diana and the short deaf kid to me to raise and I'm going to charge you if you want to see them. So Nah!

Mom: There are SO many things wrong with what you said that I can't even reply. Oh, now I get it.....

Dad: It was the "up to 50 % off, and more!" part wasn't it? I mean how's that possible?

melantha — Wed, 09 Sep 2009 01:07:30 GMT

I didn't think I would have another of these so soon, but here ya go. Another installment in Emails From My Parents.

(preface: my whole family, about a dozen of us, had been arguing over stamps. It's a long story. We thought we were done til my cousin restarted it to me..)

Jeff: It appears I have your goat! But, I am married to a Puerto Rican so, it might end up on a spit.

Dad: Did I not give a direct order that this thread is dead. The next person to tag this line is going to get a visit from me. I'll stay for two days and I'll wear nothing but underwear and a tank top and I'll drink beer and eat gassy foods.

Mom: Ok, that cinched it for me! I won't send any more messages!

Dad: I'd comb my back hair for you.

Mom: Oh if only you had been that romantic when we were married......

Mike: Wow. You know; I never thought I would have to learn any of the Stuart-Jan details. Now here we are... You never know what is going to happen next...

Dad: Well, in the first place she's a liar. I was way romantic. I can think of several occasions when I didn't even beat the snot out of her even when she clearly had it coming. But no she didn't tell people about the good stuff did she. No. No she didn't.

Me: This is my punishment, isn’t it. Just because I like to mock you incessantly and point out your many, many flaws. This is how you get back at me. I’ll remember this, you know! I have custody of your grandkids!

Mom: M, please don't interrupt your father when he is hallucinating. He can't help it, poor thing.

melantha — Sat, 08 Aug 2009 04:47:03 GMT

Oh, Hasbro, you let Sommers, Beattie, and Elliot bend you over and violate you.

--Baroness and Duke: the whole thing made me actually look away from the screen. Like, I wanted to throw up. It's the damn Baroness, and Duke. SICK. It might have been better if she double-crossed him in the end, but no. We get another sick, sick smooch.

--Destro was...hmm, rather cool. And then Cobra Commander made him his bitch!! That was way cool!

--Cobra Commander...what? Rex (which was a stupid background anyway) made an amazing Dr. Mindbinder, and then they made him into Cobra Commander? WHAT?

--Scarlett is an airhead. I do not like.

--Scarlett leans on Snake Eyes during briefings, he has his hand on her shoulder during checks, she saves him and vice versa...then HOLLYWOOD HAS TO SHOEHORN AN INTERRACIAL ROMANCE INTO IT AND MAKES HER KISS RIPCORD!! Super WTF??? It's the ONE canon romance. And they ruin it with this whole, "You make me all emotional, you big strong Ripcord man..." It hurt. It really did.

--They killed Cover Girl. After barely using her. Ouch. Very ouch, baby. But what a truly awesome way to go.

--Excuse me, Snake Eyes doesn't talk because his vocal cords are damaged after trying to save Scarlett from a helicopter crash. It's not because of his vow of silence after Storm Shadow killed their sensei. But I suppose backstory that is NOT ABOUT THE BARONESS AND DUKE'S TRUU WUV is a waste of time.

--Why...does Snake Eyes...have molded lips on his face mask. When..he...doesn't...talk? Do we have lip readers on the Joe team? Maybe he was supposed to kiss Scarlett with them and they cut it! I wish.

--Zartan. Was. Awesome.

--Storm Shadow. Was. Also. Awesome.

--Everybody. Else. Was. Mostly. Suck.

--Except Heavy Duty and Breaker. Even with the serious accents. Okay, well, Snake Eyes also heavily rocked, and we all know he is planning on offing Ripcord for touching his woman. It will just happen off-screen. In my dreams. Tonight.

--A lot of the guns/machines/vehicles/etc were pretty true to the toyline, which was nice. Kinda wish the previews hadn't shown the Eiffel Tower, because that was little more than halfway through and it was supposed to be a big, dramatic scene. Yet you know what will happen.

--BEST car chase. Snake Eyes is completely awesome in it. As in most of the movie.

Anyway, for big parts of it I was able to forget my issues, which made it eminently watchable as even a G.I. JOE movie. I just had to close my eyes for a couple scenes, rewrite like two scenes in my head, and then disregard the ending for about the last half hour.

Ugh. Thank God I already ordered the trade reprints on Larry Hama's awesome comic series to get the taste out of my mouth.

melantha — Tue, 04 Aug 2009 02:05:13 GMT

Had to post this to get it out of my inbox. If you've never read an email exchange between my parents, just use the tag to look at the old ones.

--------------------------

Dad: OK here’s the “Eyes of a Killer” I promised. (pic of my brother in Afghanistan)

Mom: Do you have any more pics of Matt that actually show his face?

Dad: I know what your next question is and the answer is no. You may not have any pictures of me......... And especially not naked ones........ for free.

melantha — Wed, 13 May 2009 13:10:16 GMT

So, I'm more than a little ticked that I can no longer access my Facebook account. A lot of people are all about "We won't ever pay for FB!" and they have all these groups dedicated to it. I've never joined those, even though I've gotten tons of invitations. And THIS is why. You know, if you never pay for a service, you can't expect that they will pay actual people to help you troubleshoot. So....I may have to recreate an account in the next few weeks, which will piss me off, since I don't think I can duplicate all the people I've luckily managed to find. And P.S. let me know if someone has messaged you from my account in the last two days, since it wouldn't have been me. I don't know that it's been hacked but I have a sneaking suspicion.

I've been sleeping far too much since I graduated, which tells me I was probably a bit worn out from this last semester. But I really need to get things done...I am supposed to leave Friday to drive up to Virginia and meet kyrielslight so we can work at the Maryland Fairy Fest or whatever the dang thing is called (I can't ever get it straight). Which means I still have some costuming to make. I'm just chilling here for a little bit first.

I started on Small Favor and Batman has Turncoat, so I should have some Harry Dresden goodness for a little bit longer. That's one thing that is awesome...being able to read again.

The house continues to be a struggle. The septic tank failed inspection, mostly because there isn't one. This, despite the fact that four years ago, it apparently was inspected and was fine. It's like the Case of the Mysterious Disappearing Septic Tank. One of two things has happened...one, the cesspool we found instead is just an old system and the septic tank is somewhere we haven't found yet, or, more likely though I hate to say it, the inspector was bought and lied about the tank so the owner could get a VA loan. We have the original inspection paperwork now, detailing the size and everything of this mythical tank, just not where it is and now the inspection company is not returning calls and so on. The seller has hired a lawyer to look into it, but we are faced with the decision...pay to put the tank in, and tack that onto the sale price? We really really want this house. It's literally our dream place. The tank would be somewhere between another 10 to 15K, which would put the price at about 210K, which we can still afford.....so, I think we may do it. Our realtor is like, walk away, there are other houses, but frankly, we looked at thirty just while we were there, and this was the best one by far. Batman and I decided that if anything else came up, that would be walk away time, but we're going to go with this I think. Argh...

melantha — Sat, 09 May 2009 13:17:57 GMT

Any of my peeps recall the Pirates Guild website? I lost it when I changed comps. I'm pretty sure all the guilds were on one page....I have my membership card but it doesn't have the site.

melantha — Fri, 08 May 2009 13:23:49 GMT

I'm graduating today with my next degree, and loving the freedom that hopefully will last until I start the next degree program at UConn. I'm in that first day stage where I suddenly want to get so much done and yet I really just need some sleep. Two of my grades are posted, both A's (one in Biology, which I was most worried about at the start of the semester but didn't towards the end). I'm waiting a bit more breathlessly for MacroEcon and for my communications class. I know I passed both with no problems, but I'm wondering how on the fence I am between an A and a B. I should get an A in both from how I felt coming out of the finals, but...eh. Everything is weighed differently.

Still getting these weird headaches, which makes me wonder if it's allergies or I have an ear infection.

I was in Atlanta for AnachroCon last weekend, and even I was surprised at how much fun I had. First off, attending anything with Justin (redforkempire) is pretty fun, just because he gets a lot of attention and it's amusing to watch. But we had discussed it beforehand and figured it might be a small con and we'd really just be going to hang out with our friends from Outland (Lindsey, Nicole, Danny, Laura and Ryan). That and promote the Red Fork Empire, of course. And the con started very slow, with perhaps a dozen or so people.

Yet it picked up very fast, and turned out pretty damn amazing! We both made a lot of new friends there (hey, we're friendly people!) and never had much of a dull moment. I'd only hung out with the Outland gang a tiny bit before, and this time I was able to actually talk to everyone and get to know them. I also met Justin's friends Austin and Megan, who were a trip, and then Nick, who is Lindsey's friend; Charles and the other Justin, Rando, Shane, etc, etc. Overall, a ridiculously fun con for being a small, one-day thing. We ended up staying out with everyone until about 3 a.m., before crashing in the hotel. The costumes were something else, too. I was pretty happy with mine, although I was missing something I wanted for my skirt, but no one seemed to notice. There were a few downsides, mostly from lack of space: it was pretty hot in some rooms, since we were all in major costumes, and there was not as much as I would like in the dealer's room (plus, severe lack of space to even look!). But dinner was great, and I was able to have it with some great friends. It ended up making me sad the next day, knowing it would be a while before I got to hang with everyone in person again.

Sunday Justin wasn't feeling well, so we hung out at the hotel until about 2, when he started to feel normal again. At that point, we headed up to the Georgia Ren Faire, to see who was out and about. I was so tired from the day previous that I had been itching to just wear street clothes, but Justin dressed up. I made it about a hundred yards from my car before the massive urge to put on costuming overcame me, so I went back and changed. I didn't have all my garb (a bunch, including my favorite hat, was packed accidentally by the movers) but I made do. Then I bought myself a new bodice because I had been looking for ages and never found anything I liked until then. Course, now I have to make a new skirt to match it. Figures.

We saw a few people from the day before, like Charles again, and we watched a few shows. I was there to shop; Justin was there to walk around and watch me shop, and we accomplished both things pretty well, I would say. After that, it was Cracker Barrel for dinner and then I had to drive back here to Brunswick, five long hours. I got back at 1 a.m. then got up at 6 a.m. to head to the 8 a.m. MacroEcon final....thus the worry about A or B. Nah, I did fine, I know it.

It's been two weeks since Chrissi died. Being so far away from the other military wives means I haven't really spoken with anyone about it, besides on Facebook or through emails. One memorial was in Hawaii, on our old base, and the other was in Chrissi's home in Everett, Washington. Both were too far for me to travel, and it weighed on me some. I know that the others were there as much as possible, but it still feels very surreal to me. I tend to think about her a lot over the course of the day, but I don't mention it to people around me because I'd rather not retell it over and over to people who didn't know her. Not that I...don't want to share, I guess? It's confusing. Chrissi was such a sweetheart, and of course I like to tell people that, but when you tell someone your good friend died, they get to only hear the bad, not the good. It also makes you think about yourself. She was two years younger than me, and like me, had two kids. (I wrote 'has' first and had to delete it. I hate that. She still has them, they're hers, you know?) I worry about the kids too. I can't help it. Anyway, I miss her. I wish she hadn't died.

I have to go. I thought I was done crying for now, but I guess not. I just miss her.

melantha — Wed, 15 Apr 2009 02:24:14 GMT

As usual, I think I will do an update, but instead I start writing about something completely different. Which I think you all prefer anyway.

Having a laptop certainly makes this a lot easier, as evidenced by the fact I just got my laptop back and now I am updating, lol. Anyway, I have this gap of time between getting off work at 2 and picking up the eldest child at 3:15. I tried to go to the post office before realizing that despite putting the box I needed to mail right by the front door, I still managed to forget it at home. I mailed off one letter, which felt a bit silly, walking into the Post Office and asking for one stamp.

So, I got around to watching the Wonder Woman animated movie. As anticipated, I had some issues with it, but I can at least say that if a non-fan watched it, I wouldn’t cringe at what they were ingesting. I spoke with redforkempire about it a little before I watched it, since it was reviewed by this girl he knew. As I said then, she was pretty much wrong on her assessments in a few ways; she claimed it was lifted straight from Amazons Attack!, the last TPB arc by G. Simone, but it really wasn’t. Only the location was the same. In AA, the Amazons are attacking Washington, D.C., after a long lead up where the Navy was blockading Themyscira since it has been moved by Zeus, blah blah blah. It wasn’t my favorite arc, as you can tell. Also in AA, Diana was working against the Amazons since they were fighting the U.S., and it set up the whole Diana/Hippolyta feud that followed. The movie, by contrast, is a fairly straightforward retelling of Diana’s origin story, and is clearly on George Perez’s “Gods and Mortals” story from the 1980s. It also borrows more from the old TV show. Steve Trevor, the American pilot, lands on Themyscira accidentally, is found by the Amazons, and one has to take him back to Man’s World and act as an ambassador. The bigger part of the plot is that Ares, who was imprisoned on the island for centuries, escaped with the help of one of the Amazons and is wreaking havoc on Man’s World. So in the movie, Diana’s mission is twofold.

What I loved about the movie was, frankly, the gore. It is the first PG-13 offering from DC Comics in animated movies, and this is because quite a few people die, some by being beheaded even, in battle. It’s not exactly graphic, but I love that they don’t pull any punches. Also, I’ve had this argument with other people before, regarding the OMAC project, where Diana broke Max Lord’s neck after he controlled Superman’s brain into trying to kill other superheroes. Although it’s been well-established in comics continuity that neither Batman nor Superman is willing to kill, it has been hinted at and sometimes even shown that Wonder Woman has no such restrictions. It wouldn’t make sense if she did; she’s from a warrior race in ancient Greece. In case you haven’t seen 300, that means they killed their enemies. The only possible argument here is that Diana was created after the Amazons were at peace, so she had no opportunity to fight in earnest, but the fact is that the Amazons not only taught her how to kill in battle, they also most certainly regaled her with many a story of their exploits. It’s their history, and she is their daughter. None of them would think twice about hiding that from her.

So, I love that aspect of this movie. It starts with the origins of the Amazons, of them fighting (and dying and killing) Ares’ army of men. When Hippolyta tries to kill Ares, she is stopped by Zeus, and only allowed to take Ares prisoner. Then later they get to live in peace on their island, and so on. I’m not going to recap the plot overall, because it just needs to be seen. But there is another point of dialogue that I adored, and I feel underscores how Diana is different from Bruce and Clark/Kal-el. When she first lands on U.S. soil, she is in a park, and sees a few young boys excluding a crying girl from their play-swordsmanship. When she is perplexed and goes over to the girl for an explanation, she is aghast when the girl says she has to stay there and be ‘saved’ by the boys. Diana then proceeds to get a fake sword and shows the girl, in detail, how to thrust a sword to better eviscerate her enemy. She even said that to the girl, claiming the boys “were doing it all wrong, and would certainly fall in battle immediately.” Hell YEA. That’s my Wonder Woman right there.

There are other points of battle that I really enjoyed, and I was surprised at how detailed and quite engrossing the extended fights towards the end were. A lot of times, animated battles are too choppy or predictable, or even downright boring. I was a lot more impressed by this one. There was also another part, I’ll have to rewatch to be sure, where I think Diana actually slits the throat of a guard with her tiara. Awesome.

Okay, so what I did not like…..Etta Candy. To be honest, I’m a bit torn on you, my poor Ms. Candy, the most maligned of all WW supporting characters. Etta is the only character besides Hippolyta and Steve Trevor who survives from the very first Wondy comics. Back then, Etta was comic relief, a sort of foil who was meant to represent the ‘modern’ girl who was inspired by Wondy’s appearance. True to the implications of her name, Etta was a very short, very round girl, who weirdly enough oversaw her own group of “Candy Girls” who were basically a bunch of tall, skinny cheerleaders. Etta came up to roughly their navels. But, whatever, it was attempting to show a group of young, forward thinking girls who followed the feminist ideal of Wonder Woman. Forwarding on from there, Etta became Diana’s best friend, an associate at her work in the Army, then a fellow Army officer (yes, Wondy was in the Army), and eventually a special agent under Nick Fury alongside Diana (that is the current continuity). Also, in the next-to-most-recent continuity, DC finally ended the Diana-and-Steve OTP by having Etta and Steve marry, presumably once he figured out Diana was just never going to give it up.

Now, in the movie, Etta has a very brief appearance…as a secretary or Army personnel, it’s not quite clear, who drops a pen under a desk and asks the big, strong, tough Steve to move the desk and fetch it. When Diana, with an expression just short of an eye roll, literally lifts the desk up and gets the pen, Etta gives her the ‘oh-no-you-didn’t’ look. It’s a very funny scene, and illustrates Diana’s sometime-impatience with women who refuse to acknowledge their own strengths, but it’s Etta. Really, after her history, she deserves a bit better. She’s always been shown to be one of Diana’s best friends. I understand that DC wanted to use an established supporting cast, but they could have fleshed that out a bit more. And really, the encounter isn’t completely unbelievable, even with Etta; it can easily be a point that they joke over later. Etta is capable of being that devious now and then. But….I dunno, it just stuck me there.

I pretty much hated Steve. I am not a huge Steve Trevor fan anyway; his macho routine always irritated me. A person like that should be Diana’s foil, not her romantic interest. And on the other hand, there were times I actually liked him in this…but only when he shut up and was actually doing something. Or when he was a bit honest, which never seemed to happen. And I will give it to him….he wasn’t as bad as the TV show Steve. But he looked like he was about 60 the way he was animated, and there was zero spark between he and Diana (yet she kisses him anyway, go figure. Have to bow to continuity, right?). He also served the purpose of getting her to start to relax her Amazon-taught hatred of men, and to maybe see the other side.

But his dialogue! Dear God above, why, DC, why??? You take such a great actor as Nathan Fillion and give him this? Case in point: the Amazons are warriors. Warriors that see a lot of nasty stuff on the battlefield, right? I’m thinking feces, urine, blood, entrails, vomit, and so on. Hello, it’s battle. It’s not clean. Fast forward to the Amazons interrogating Steve once he lands on the island. Under the magic lasso, he gets frustrated and yells, “I don’t have to take this crap!” Despite his immediate apology, Queen Hippolyta makes him explain what ‘crap’ means, since they had never heard this word. When he says it’s another word for excrement, they all make disgusted faces, and the queen goes to her daughter, “You see how disgusting mankind is?” They were offended by the word ‘crap’! These are people who have cheerfully beheaded men and laughed. Why on earth would the mere word (obviously spoken in anger and turmoil) upset them? It was just a stretch by the scriptwriter to show how men were uncouth and women were more refined. I don’t need the clue-by-four, I get what the Amazons are about and why they hate men. Get it, thanks. The sole purpose of using ‘crap’, which they actually do, repeatedly, is to get the laugh when Diana herself finally uses it.

And then, Hippolyta says, “Here the true nature of men is laid bare. What other depraved thoughts must you be thinking?” Since Steve is still under the rope, and it compels him to answer any questions, he says automatically, “Your daughter’s got a nice rack.” Whereupon all the Amazons look at Diana, who blushes and covers her chest.

Does anyone else see the problem here? Go ahead, I’ll give you a moment. Hint, it has something to do with their reaction to ‘crap.’

How about, if they don’t know what crap means, how in the hell would they know that ‘rack’ referred to her breasts? As an aside, in the book adaptation he says ‘ass’, which I hated at first but obviously would be a bit better in this context. Also, at one point Steve asks Artemis what Diana’s ‘deal’ is, and of course Artemis knows exactly what he means and responds. I have no idea how she could get what ‘deal’ meant in this context….maybe she reads special current-lingo comics that get beamed to Themyscira. It’s honestly my best guess when it comes to this dialogue.

So, whatever, Steve has shitty dialogue. Sorry, Steve, I’m not as sympathetic to you as I am to Etta.

That’s mostly what I hated, and I’m going back to what I loved (which thankfully outweighed the hate). Specifically, I’m going back to my favorite part of the whole movie. And it actually has nothing to do with Wonder Woman.

An Amazon named Persephone is the one who frees Ares from his prison, and journeys with him to Man’s World. It’s clear that she loves Ares, who seduced her while she was a guard to his prison. She is with him the whole time, even while his newly-arisen army is again decimating her sisters. Back in the beginning of the movie, it was shown how another sister’s cowardice led to Persephone getting a sword to the eye and creating a huge scar across her face. So this character could be really one-note, all bent on revenge and getting back at those who let that happen.

But instead, we get the best commentary on the Amazons and their tragic flaw. Hippolyta is the one who confronts Persephone in the climatic battle, and actually runs her through, delivering a mortal blow. And when she does, she says to her, “Why did you turn against us, your sisters? I gave you peace, and prosperity, and eternal life.”

And Persephone, heartbreakingly replies that doing so also took away “love, and children, and family….the Amazons are warriors, but we are women, too.”

I mean, that is brilliant, and no one ever thinks about that. It’s always about men’s ways versus women’s ways, but the argument of the Amazons existence ignores the fact that they also lose companionship with men, and children, and family ties. The loss of children has been brought up in some of the Simone runs, and I have always been glad to see it. But I was ecstatic, and moved, to see it addressed this way in the movie. It really shows the Amazons what they have lost by retreating from the world. (As another aside, one reviewer I usually like pointed out it should have been ‘human’ instead of women to stay completely nonsexist, and I get that, but I like it anyway). Persephone turned out to be a wonderfully sad and tragic character, rather than just a two-dimensional character. Barring the fact, of course, that she is actually two-dimensional.

Overall, I am pleased with the movie, and I don’t have any nonSteve cringeworthy moments, so that’s a good record. I can now safely look forward to the Green Lantern movie. Except for the fact that it’s not Kyle or John Stewart, or not even Alan Scott, but that dork ~~the Spectre~~ ~~Parallax~~ Hal Jordan. I believe he still holds the record for most attempts to restore a character to his former glory, but I could be wrong.

I’m home now, but still on the laptop because my daughter is on the home computer. When we move into the new house, we’re going to install a wireless network so I can actually be on the comp now and then with a teenager in the house. I actually used the parental controls for the first time on my computer, albeit just the time controls. It shuts down during the hours of 9 p.m. and 6 a.m. so she can’t get on at that time. I don’t feel guilty at all, for several reasons: she had started neglecting her homework and her personal hygiene, not to mention she was getting less and less sleep. I spoke with her repeatedly about it and got nowhere (well, specifically I got some eye rolls, a whole bunch of ‘just a minute’s and a lot of ‘I’ll do it in just a second’ all of which combined to late nights with unbrushed teeth). So, I told her I was going to do it, and then I did. So far, it actually seems to be helping. She hasn’t been upset, just shrugs and goes to do her nightly things. I’ve had more problems this week getting her to stop using her cell phone for excessive calls, since she has a prepaid that is supposed to be for emergencies. What bothers me the most is when she uses it at home. Mostly because I have unlimited long distance on my home phone, and she is allowed to use it all she wants. Why she has to use the cell minutes up is beyond me. I can’t really recall what it was like for me at her age since we didn’t have cell phones back then, nor did we have computers. I do get the comp addiction, since I have a bit of it myself. But she hasn’t quite developed the skills to manage it as yet.

Both of the girls seem to be at full health now, although I hate saying that because I don’t think we have any natural wood in this house to knock on. I need to get back to my regular doctor visits now, because I missed a bunch while the girls were hospitalized. My eyes are still not 100% and it’s about time to get them operated on again. I need to have all that done before we move, and my schedule is just still so damn full.

I have committed to going up and helping kyrielslight with the Fairy Faire or whatever it’s called, up in Virginia/Maryland? That’s midMay. I also just told my father I’d bring the girls down to Key West to visit him in May, so I need to figure out where I can do that. And May 1st, I’ll be at AnachroCon in Atlanta with redforkempire and some others. I just worry I’ll be doing the last of my sewing the night before, kinda how I was doing with Megacon. But I really don’t want to just buy something, not when I am capable of sewing my costume. It’s really frustrating….I don’t have the time to put into the outfits as I would like. I also really wanted to do a prop I had in mind, which would require an extended visit to Home Depot. But when do I have time to craft it? I feel like I’m cheating if I ‘cop out’ and buy though. Really can’t win here.

We’re flying out in a week from tomorrow to start looking at houses. I’m looking forward to some uninterrupted time with Batman, since we got just one night since he came back, and it’s been pretty frantic since then (plus we are sleeping in the house with our two kids, my parents, and my sister, and it is NOT that roomy). We also had the movers come and take all our stuff already, since it takes a while to get things shipped with the Navy. We’re down to one room, our clothes, and the girls toys. Overall, it’s pretty stressful. The house hunt is….anticipatory. We’ve got a good list to look at, although the one house I really liked sold last week. There are still plenty, and you can’t tell until you see them in person as it is, but it’s easy to get attached or excited. Either way, we have to be ready to put an offer on one by the end of our visit, because we need to close in June.

Alright, I am tired, I'll post more some other time.

Gakked from aztecknight

melantha — Sun, 08 Mar 2009 17:22:35 GMT

I decided to make a Skrull of myself!

I have no idea where the "merciful" thing came from, but anyway, the important thing is, I managed to do an sort-of emblem of the Red Fork Empire on her costume. Awesome.

melantha — Sun, 08 Mar 2009 03:11:17 GMT

Well, 2009 continues it's tradition of sucking, three months in. Sheesh.

melantha — Fri, 02 Jan 2009 18:08:01 GMT

Another installment in the Dad email category of Fun. This one is to my mom and brother, after my brother says he wants to buy a house closer to my mother.

----
Oh! I guess him’s want’s to be near him’s Mommy. FINE! That doesn’t bother me. I can be the big one here. BUT WHEN THE END-TIME COMES SHE CAN’T LIVE IN THE MAIN HOUSE!!! SHE CAN SLEEP IN THE BARN! …………………… (It’ll be a nice barn. She can have an electric blanket. … And some grape soda……… and Frito’s). BUT THAT’S IT!!! .... (She can sit on the porch with regular folk at Christmas) …… (And Halloween cuz she’s a witch)

----

Hope you enjoyed!

melantha — Thu, 01 Jan 2009 23:34:40 GMT

Well, an inauspicious beginning to the New Year for me...

Someone broke into my car overnight and stole my iPod and my portable DVD player, with my kid's DVD inside it.

Really....to me, thieves are the lowest of the low. It was obviously for my baby, because the DVD player is hung right in front of her car seat, with her little blanket on it. Honestly, people. Low.

But it could have been worse, so I'm just chalking it up to bad luck for now. I can live without both those things. Not well, but I can live without.

melantha — Thu, 01 Jan 2009 03:21:01 GMT

So, what do you do on New Years Eve if your beloved in on the continent of Africa and you are on North America?

You play online dominoes with him, of course. XD

Happy New Year, everyone. I do hope it is more scintillating than mine, although I wouldn't be away from this comp right now for anything.

melantha — Wed, 31 Dec 2008 16:12:06 GMT

Testing.

http://www.megaupload.com/?d=JOUL5BKQ

melantha — Sat, 27 Dec 2008 00:44:28 GMT

Excuse me, we all know you want to have the sexiness that the KING haz!!

melantha — Thu, 25 Dec 2008 15:23:27 GMT

Well, that was fun if a bit awkward, haha. Since Batman is deployed, we have the webcam set up so he could watch us open gifts and such this morning. Of course, since the comp doesn't afford a complete view of the living room, I had to hold it a lot, and we had some stops and starts with him trying to get online....whew. I think I barely saw what everyone opened, including my own gifts! But I got at least three different DC Comics related gifts, so who cares?! It's ALL GOOD. Also, C-Bear got a huge kitchen set which she has NOT left alone all morning, except to be pissed off when someone else opens a gift without her ripping the paper. It's her second Xmas, so the first where she started to see there was STUFF.

Batman sent us all super-cool gifts from Africa, including a statue of a tribal elder for me (!!) but the t-shirts he found absolutely rock. They were:

"Ski Djibouti" with a skier on it (of course, Djibouti is a desert nation)
"Bouti Hunter" complete with pirate picture
"Have a Djibouti-ful Day!" for my mom, with yellow smiley faces
"Djibouti-licious" as a tank top for my sister

Diana's says "Djibouti" with a lion on it, which she will love. She has a ton of gifts to open when she gets back from her dad's place.

I'm going to post pictures of the Africa gifts and some other stuff in a little bit. Cooking now!

melantha — Fri, 19 Dec 2008 17:17:01 GMT

I just can't seem to SIT DOWN and do an update, although a poopload of stuff has been happening to meee. All good now but boy has it been stressful.

I will just say that me and my two kids are all scheduled for surgery for different things in January, haha. Stress!! But it's all good. Banana is having her tonsils out, which should make a big difference in her overall quality of life (breathing, eating, she might gain some weight now! finally). Bear is having tubes put in her ears in an attempt to see if that helps her regain some hearing. She still hasn't spoken any words....it really just makes me feel so isolated that my almost-two-year-old can't talk.

And then I am getting LASIK!! YAY GO MEEEE! About f-ing time.

So, there is much I wish to comment on in my friends journals but I am feverishly packing. However, I will say CONGRATS to spiritseeker and terriergirl on the egg-laying, and CONGRATS to aslanlionchic for her super nifty opera role (ABOUT F-ING TIME TOO!), and prayers to ragdoll and her mom, thank God it wasn't as bad as it might have been, and, um....congrats to gestapodreams for finally dicovering Javier Bardeem. I would have thought you had wet dreams about him for years already.

I am about to install Firefox and jettison IE after this weekend, so any tips are welcome.

And I'm audi...

melantha — Sun, 07 Dec 2008 21:03:53 GMT

Vote for my story over HERE pleases!!! It's under Best PWP/Smut. And, uh, obviously it's smut, so read at your own peril. Or pleasure, whatever you wish, heehee...

melantha — Sat, 22 Nov 2008 12:57:27 GMT

Anyone who has ever played in LARP or SCA or even just done Faire should go see Role Models which is out right now. Let's just say that they have a group called LAIRE in the movie which is a cross between all those and is HILARIOUS. And the end, when they create the kingdom "Kiss-My-Anthia", is awesome.

I have a LOT to update but since it's all still happening, it'll be late getting here.

melantha — Wed, 05 Nov 2008 18:57:14 GMT

I just got kyrielslight's Xmas gift in the mail. If you want to see what it is, just comment here with your email, lol.

NOTE: This is the gift I am giving TO her, not the one FROM her.

melantha — Wed, 05 Nov 2008 14:36:03 GMT

I'm really hoping this isn't bread and circuses. But that's exactly what it looks like to me. (See: Roman Empire)

Because FL tightened their voting laws, my military non-resident absentee ballot was refused (I "had to prove" that I couldn't reside legally in FL because of military orders...wtf?). So, supposedly I can't complain about the next four years because I didn't get to vote. Let's just say I'm not happy on a couple of levels. But that's in the past now. I'll just have to wait and see like everyone else.

BTW, I forgot to repost that gay marriage statement thing but I do agree with it. Just in case some of you thought I wasn't doing it on purpose. I'm not a Dem, but that part I can see.

Why do I still LIVE in this state?

melantha — Fri, 31 Oct 2008 12:58:18 GMT

This is my costume, and so far, no one at school has gotten it.

melantha — Thu, 30 Oct 2008 18:19:42 GMT

I went a little nuts on the iTunes yesterday, which was at least partly wintersweet's fault. I downloaded the whole Nightmare Revisted soundtrack (it is awesome, I agree), and had to get HSM3 for the kids (right, sure, for the kids). Both are a lot of fun. I also downloaded some of the new pop stuff, since I am a sucker and I like pop music, child of the 80s and all that. And today, I noticed that they had the whole Thriller album on sale for $4.99 and it came with the Thriller video. Well, that was a necessity, I'm afraid.

Although I'm not a fan of the books, and I'm not NEARLY as crazy about the movie as permusicadastra, haha, I find I like the trailers for Twlight. I'm hoping I will like it better than I liked the writing (don'tflameme).

I need sleep, but as usual, not enough hours in the day. Plus, I'm busy getting licked to death by a kitty.