Strawberry Kisses

Quick note

lizblack — Wed, 06 Oct 2004 09:49:33 GMT

I'm sorry it's been awhile...I can't even write much now, we have to hide a lot of things that are muggle...with the DE's running around and all. So far negoitiations have been as good as it can be when you are "negotiating" with DE's. I've been heading back to the hut lately to find Gurglemesh pale as a ghost and looks ready to collapse...I've told Charlie about it, he thinks I should talk to him, help raise his spirits.

We're pretty sure he's fighting the Imperius curse, and it's sapping his strength. I think I'll owl Remus for some chocolate. That's always a good pick me up.

Need to go...

On Eggshells

lizblack — Sun, 26 Sep 2004 22:03:35 GMT

Sorry for the kind of long wait to post. DE's have slowly started showing up, and any half-bloods need to be careful. Since I obviously am one, I have to make sure that this little bugger isn't seen. Don't think a muggle contraption would go over well.

Anyway...for fear of who else might read this, I will not reveal a lot. All I can say, is they've shown up and we're constantly on our toes. Our young Order members are doing well. I am worried about Gurglemesh, he seems a lot more jumpy now that they're here. I think this is his first field job, poor boy.

I need to go...Hatching our tomorrow, I need to have my strength up.

Explainations, Recuirts, and Sorrow

lizblack — Mon, 20 Sep 2004 13:07:46 GMT

First what Charlie did for that week;

The storm outside was starting to calm and the sun was beginning to rise. Liz was finally beginning to feel some peace. Or as much peace as one could feel in a time of war.

A velvet soft large green comforter was draped across her as well as the person she snuggled with. It felt fantastic against her cool bare skin. With a contended sigh she snuggled closer to her companion. He immediately wrapped his arm around her waist, protectively.

She smiled and sighed once more. The two lay contended like that for a few moments, then Charlie pulled her closer to him still, he buried his face against her bare shoulder. “Merlin Lizzie…I love you.” He said.

Liz smiled and replied, “I love you too.” She felt him smile against her and then he lightly kissed her shoulder. Liz never wanted to leave this position. She was happy, relaxed, she knew that soon they wouldn’t be able to enjoy this kind of peace. Soon Death Eaters would be raining down on them, much like the water had done the night before.

Peace was not inevitable, it worried her, she couldn’t imagine what was going to happen. It was like the whole week over again, she couldn’t imagine what he’d done…He’d been alone, spying on Death Eaters. Her thoughts went back to that week and she tensed.

Charlie felt her body’s reaction immediately and frowned. “Lizzie, what’s wrong?” She began to shake her head, but then realized if she didn’t find out it would all the worse.

“What did you do all week Charlie?” As soon as the question left her quiet voice, he tensed as well.

He didn’t reply, so Liz gently rolled over. His eyes were closed and his face looked older then 28 years. Carefully, tenderly she placed a palm against his freckled cheek. “Charlie…”

“On…oh what night was it…Saturday, I wasn’t technically on duty. But I told Mellony that I would stay up with her; I wanted to think and knew the night would help. But soon she got tired of me pacing and being angsty and told me to go sulk somewhere else. So I got up and headed towards the forest. I knew it was quiet there and I wouldn’t be bothering anyone with my problems. So off in the forest I walked. I was so deep in thought by the time I stopped to look around I was on the other side of the forest. I had decided then, to just go away for a little while.

It was to hard for me to stay here, it was hard to argue with you, it was hard to avoid you throughout the day, it was hard to, when we did see one another, have you shoot that look at me. So I decided to head for Bran, it was only a few miles away…It seemed like a good enough plan. Bran is a nice sized town, and quiet. So I went to Bran…”

Liz interrupted him. “Wait, you walked to Bran.” He nodded. “Charlie! That’s not a few miles! If you took muggle transportation it’s like an hour away from here! And you walked!!”

He hushed her, “Lizzie, it’s ok, nothing happened, that was the least eventful thing that happened. Now I went to Bran.”

Liz mumbled under her breath, “walking to Bran…crazy” He chuckled but continued.

“In Bran I got a little room to stay in. Didn’t do much for Monday to Tuesday, just sat in that room and thought. But then on Wednesday, when I was actually planning on coming back, I was down in a little cafe and a man came in. At first I couldn’t figure out why I recognized him, but I did, and then I realized it was Richard Donovan.” Liz gasped. “And I knew he wasn’t there for some vacation. It was obvious he had other plans. I wanted to contact Dumbledore, but there wasn’t time he hadn’t seen me yet and so when he left I followed.

It was late by this time, almost dark, and so it was easy to hide. I followed him all the way to the old castle, the one all the muggles tour because it’s supposed to be ‘Count Dracula’s’ castle and all that rubbish. But he went in through this side door, unlocked it with Alohamora, and I waited. I knew wherever he’d went it hadn’t just been right inside the door so I snuck in after him.

I couldn’t find him at first. It was nerve-racking. Being in this old spooky place, where a famous vampire had once been rumoured to reside and then knowing at least one Death Eater, if not more were wandering around. But then I heard voices, and saw a light down a flight of stairs. I didn’t dare go down them, but luckily I had gotten some extendable ears from Fred and George earlier…and had forgotten to take them out of my pockets. So I used those.

Apparently what I gathered from that first meeting, he was trying to convince the vampires hanging out down there, that the Dark Lord was back and…and he wanted them back on his side. That night I got out safely. But I didn’t get to follow Richard to where he was staying.

So the next night I stayed out on the streets hoping to get a glimpse of him. At around five that exactly what I did get. I followed him again, and eventually he went back to the castle. He talked more to the vampires, and this time did manage to convince them. They said they’d get together with some others and go to the latest hide-out. I didn’t get where the new hide-out was, all Donovan said was ‘I’ll give you information later on where to met the Dark Lord’.

This time I did get to follow him back. He apparently had a little ‘summer home’ in Bran, or was borrowing one. He was staying in a little cottage near the end of town. So after I found this out I headed back to my room with plans to defiantly contact Dumbledore. I realized twice was a lucky break to not have been caught. I wasn’t going to attempt more. But before I could even get to the street, three figures showed up outta nowhere and headed to the cottage.

It was even luckier I didn’t get caught then. They showed up almost right in front of me, but I was quick enough to hid in the shadows before anyone noticed me. I realized I couldn’t go home, not now, not when they could plan something important. So I followed them to the cottage and they headed to probably a sitting room or something. There was a window outside the room anyway.

For some reason the dunder heads didn’t think of putting a silencing spell up, lucky for me. So I was able to hear all of this conversation. They didn’t get much done. Only that some other plan they had had was foiled. Then they argued a lot, and two left. One stayed, and Donovan and the newbie talked…nothing important, they wanted to go out and muggle bait. But you-know-who had apparently told them to lay low, so they changed their mind, but not after some ridiculous arguments.

Then the two went to bed. I was going to also head back, but knew that if I did, and the other’s returned I could end up missing some really important information. So I camped out that night. Didn’t move from that spot. Was a bloody uncomfortable place to be too.

But it was a good thing I didn’t go back. Because only a few hours later the same two from the night before showed up, along with a few others. They knocked, for I have no idea who long, but finally Donovan came downstairs and the others went inside again.

At first it wasn’t anything interesting. Almost normal conversation. Some of them talked about there families, at one point two got into an argument about who was the Dark Lord’s favourite, stupid really, but then around lunch time two more showed up at the house.

It was shitting scary, Liz, here I was alone, outside a small house filled with nine Death Eaters. I started thinking, ‘if they catch me out here, I’m dead…or worse!’ luckily they didn’t. But they started talking about this new plan. The two new guys were the ones doing most of the talking. They asked about how the vampire thing had went, and then asked some of the others about some hags and a few werewolves, the hag things apparently went over well…though one of the men said they deserved a reward for what the hags wanted in return…I can only imagine. But the werewolf assignment apparently hadn’t gone so well. The three that had gone on that mission apparently had almost been bitten by the pack on the full moon. They weren’t interested in you-know-who’s plans.

It was good to know, I think Lupin would have been proud. Anyway…then they started talking about dragons. It was dinner time by now, and I was starving, and so tired. But they kept talking. They didn’t say anything directly about the Reserve, though I thought they might be heading in that direction…so I stayed, I listened. But the conversation ended. They had some food and then six of them left. So three were left in the house.

Once again, I wanted to head home, but I couldn’t. Before the six had gone, they had something about another meeting, the next day, Saturday. So I stayed…at about ten the next morning two of the DE’s left, I decided to follow them. They stopped at a shoppe and a café—I grabbed something there—then they headed back. I followed.

It was about five. Almost immediately after we returned the other six came back. This time the conversation went straight to the Reserve. I heard enough to know they were coming here to try and get support and I immediately apparated to my room, check out and came back here. I told Dumbledore all this, and then I came to this hut and found a beautiful worried maiden and shag—“

Liz smacked him playfully, but her face was lined with worry. “Charlie…you could have been caught…you could have been killed! Merlin, you could have been put under the Imperius curse!” She suddenly glared at him. “You aren’t, are you?” Charlie laughed.

“Lizzie, if I was under the Imperius curse, those idiots would have to do have known we were having a huge row and all the other little things…like how your ticklish right…here” And he brushed his hand right under her bum, making her squirm.

“Now…that’s not fair. But I believe you…not under the Imperius curse…” He smiled and leaned down to kiss her. But she pulled away and he missed, his lips hitting her forehead instead.

“Liz?” He was confused.

“I’m sorry Charlie…it’s just, I’m scared. This war has just become too much for me. And it’s not even really started. I’ve already lost Sirius, I thought I had lost you…and now…Death Eaters are going to parade around this place I’ve started to call home. They’ll most likely kill, injure, or imprison people that have become my close friends. And then they could take you, for real this time. I don’t know if I could live with that.” Charlie wrapped both his arms around her frame and pulled her tight to him.

“I know Lizzie, I’m sorry I didn’t contact you while I was gone…I didn’t mean to make you think something like that had happened. But there was no way I could. You know?” He felt her nod against his chest. “But for what its worth, I am really sorry.”

She didn’t say anything for awhile, and Charlie got a little worried, was she not going to except his apology? He didn’t think he could live with her still angry at him. Not when what was on the horizon was getting closer and closer every day. But then she gently kissed him on the coller bone and looked up at him.

“I know you are Weasley, and I’m sorry too…for being such a prat. And not giving you….well…me, when you really deserved it.” He smiled down at her, his brown eyes sparkled warmly at her.

“I was worse, trying to make you get over something quickly just because I wanted your attention. I’m sorry I was so forceful to make you get over him. And I’m even more sorry for not trusting Lynn…I really want to apologize to her.” Liz looked down.

“I don’t know how to reach her…I tried owl’ing her earlier, to tell her what was going on…but Ari came back with the letter…he looked almost dazed. I wish I knew she was alright…Her father is probably furious. She went against his wishes…trying to get a job at Diagon Alley, she even told her father—sort of—that she was dating a Weasley. He wasn’t to pleased…I hope she’s alright.”

Kindly, he lifted Liz’s chin up to look at him in the eye. “Liz, don’t you worry, Dumbledore, I’m sure, is on it…everything is fine. Why don’t you try owl’ing Fred…he may know where she is…unless they had a fight…don’t want to think about what that would be like…she’s worse then you!”

“Hey!” she playfully slapped his arm and he smiled. With a sigh, however, she leaned up against him and whispered out, “I hope your right…”

Charlie went to respond but found she’d fallen asleep.

That’s what went on Saturday night/Sunday morning.

Five new recruits are here now. I believe their names are Carol Bens, Tony Reynolds, Helga Kent, Gurglemesh Tirade, and Harvey Long. Really nice kids. (They are all so young) Three of them, Tony, Helga, and Gurglemesh—I believe—are specifically trained to fight off the Imperius curse. Which is really comforting.

We are still waiting for the DE’s to show up…but so far, so good. I can only hope they have ‘more important things to attend too’, so they’ll leave us alone!

A Storm Dragged In

lizblack — Sun, 19 Sep 2004 13:57:53 GMT

The black clouds rolled overhead, a storm was brewing. Tonks and Liz sat with two cups of tea. Liz was focused on nothing, all she could see was the blurring around her eyes. Tonks was staring at her worriedly, she looked a mess. Her face was pale, eyes red and puffy, hair limp. She hadn't changed for three days in a row. It was the same grimy grey t-shirt and jean capri's. They had stains across them, from food, dirty, but mostly salty tears.

Tonks was worried, severely worried about the girl that had been her best friend since she was eleven years old. Putting her saucer down she reached across the table and put a hand over Liz's. "Al'right Liz?" She asked quietly.

Liz slowly turned her head to her friend. Her eyes were blank and wet. She didn't speak for a few moments.

"I'm...I'm dead inside Dora." Tonks jumped a bit. Liz hadn't called her Dora in years, it was her serious name for her (Tonks called her Betha when she was serious). "I lost Sirius...and I thought it was over, I wouldn't be able to go on, love or live again...Then Charlie came, he showed me I could, that life was worth it. He made me love again...and I pushed him away, time and time again.

We were fighting, Dora, over that exact thing, he had a right to be angry with me...not that I didn't have a right to be angry with him...but...I was pushing him away. He didn't deserve that, and now I can't apologize, I can't show him that I understand now. That I'm ready to give him all of my love. I've lost a second person to this FUCKING war. And it's barely begun...it's barely begun Dora. I can't do this anymore....It's to much...when he didn't come back yesterday, I died along with him."

"Betha, he might not be ...dead... we dont' know that."

"Dora! If he's not he's probably worse then dead! Look at Frank and Alice! Look at what's already happened to Arthur! I can't even imagine what horrors he's had to go through. If he is alive, who's to say he'll be even close to the person he was before? He might not remember anyone or anything! He may be so deformed he will refuse to even be seen. I can't even begin to comprehend what could be going on right now! It's over Dora, he's gone...and most likely in the most final way..." Liz didn't start crying but she was much paler then she was before.

Tonks didn't know what to do. She couldn't imagine losing two lovers in such a short amount of time. The only thing she could think of was hugging her. So with a grace she didn't know she possessed she got up and kneeled next to her friend wrapping her arms around her. Liz leaned into the hug and sighed, her breath broken, silent tears started to flow.

They sat there for so long, Tonks giving her friend strength and support, Liz trying to hold herself together. Outside the storm had started, lightening and thunder raged. Rain was pouring down and it matched Liz's internal storm. She felt the heavens where sympathizing with her pains.

That was when the front door was thrown open. The girls couldn't see who'd come in due to the half-wall blocking there view but they heard a gasp and stuttering. Tonks confused let go and stroked her friends matty hair. "Let me see who that is Liz...I'll be back" Liz nodded slightly not saying anything, instead looked out the window at the black raining, thundering clouds.

"Liz'beth!!" Tonks screamed from the other side. With a wrenching sigh she got up slowly. Pushing in her chair she took three futile steps around the partonage. Her eyes, already adjusted to the darkness, took in the small room. Tonks was almost right next to her gaping, Diggle--who'd been on 'watch' was standing and shaking. The front door was wide open and in it stood a soaking, exhausted red-head.

Liz gasped and cried all at once. "C-Cha-Charlie?!" She was sobbing, without another thought she ran over to him and threw her arms full around him, eyes pouring with relief and worry. "Oh God, Charlie, oh god, I'm sorry...Charlie?" He hadn't done anything. Backing off and looking up at him she saw he was worse off looking then her. His curly red hair was drenched and dripping down his face, into his eyes. His face was downcast, dirty, paler then the moon. His clothes were torn and his normal tanned body looked strained, tired. "Oh Charlie! What happened?!"

"No time. Need Dumbledore." Liz was so surprised she didn't know what to do, luckily Tonks was on top of things.

"Dumbledore gotcha." She apparated out quickly. As soon as she was gone Charlie's face seemed a little less tight and lined. He looked down at Liz again and stared at her. She became uncomfortable by his scrutiny, she realized how bad she looked...But before she could apologize or go hide herself he wrapped his arms tightly around her--seeming to forget Dedalus was around.

With his tight embrace, his body shaking, Liz lost control again, she sobbed. He held her tighter. "I am so sorry Lizzie. So sorry. I should never have doubted Lynn, I should never had said anything about Sirius, I never should have doubted you. Merlin, I'm so sorry."

"Oh Charlie, I'm sorry! I've never been so sorry in my entire life!" The two didn't say much more, just clung to one another until Dumbledore apparated with Tonks.

"Mr. Weasley..."

"Dumbledore, sir! The Death Eaters! They have gotten support from the Vampires of Bran! They've been meeting there for months...or so I could gander...The way it sounds is they are headed this way in hopes to get us Dragontamers on their side...for the dragons, sir!"

Dumbledore's blue eyes were severely focused on the second oldest Weasley. "Let us talk in private Charlie. Elizabeth, Nymphadora, Dedalus, if you could please excuse us."

"Sir!" Tonks shouted, taking a look at her woe-begotten friend.

"I will return him safe and sound within the hour, Nymphadora."

"It's alright Tonks, it's important." Liz smiled slightly at her friend, then walked over to Charlie and kissed him softly on the cheek.

He looked down at her and with a quick fury kissed her on the lips then apparated with Dumbledore.

It was almost two hours before the two apparated back to the small hut. Diggle had apparated to Grimmauld, he knew that when Charlie returned Liz would want time alone with him, and Tonks said she'd wait until the two men had returned. And she had, the two had sat, almost in total silence waiting.

When they returned, Charlie looked a little less exhausted, but they both looked grim. Tonks and Liz immediately stood up. Liz held herself back from leaping at him once more.

"Nymphadora, I thank you for staying with Elizabeth, but if you could...I need to speak with these two alone."

"Of course Professor! I'll just head back then. You hold in there Liz, girl." And before Liz could respond Tonks was gone. Liz turned back to Dumbledore and Charlie. The three just stood there until Liz suddenly realized she was being rude.

"Oh! Sir would you like some tea?" Dumbledore gave her a crooked smile but politely declined.

"If we could just sit, I can let you two talk sooner."

"Right, right. Sitting." Liz quickly took a seat and the two followed her lead. Charlie sat in a small recliner next to the couch and Dumbledore took a nice rocker.

"From what Charlie has told me you soon will have Death Eaters trying to infiltrate the Reserve. I suggest you both try and subtly warn the others here of what is about to happen, and that you two yourselves arm against what's about to happen. The Order will be sending some members down, new recruits if you will, to help guard the area. But you two will be head of this assignment as you both have been down here longer then anyone else and know the area and the peoples. I will now leave you to your own devices as I have some things now to take care of."

Liz and Charlie stood as Dumbledore nodded at them and apparated away. After he'd gone, the two left stood not speaking at first. Then Charlie turned to Liz and opened his mouth to say something but she stopped him.

"Love, I don't care right now...I don't care where you went, why you went, what you found out, as long as you still love me that's all that matters. Is that still true?" He nodded furiously. "Good, now I need, more then anything else for you to kiss me." Charlie didn't need to be told twice. With as much force that had built up from sorrow, loneliness, worry, fear, and exploding love; he seared her lips with a passionate kiss.

The rest when I can focus.

Gone to the Ministry

lizblack — Fri, 17 Sep 2004 14:16:15 GMT

I can't say much...it's hurts...Charlie is still gone. Dumbledore is meeting today with the Ministry. He's heading there now...actually he should be there....life is a horrible thing.

A lead.....that ended in failure

lizblack — Thu, 16 Sep 2004 21:36:39 GMT

I meant to update earlier, but we thought we had a lead on his where-abouts earlier. We, being Moody, Diggle, and I, went after the source. Tonks wanted to go...but we needed someone to stay here at the reserve in case he came back or someone came calling for me. I went because I know the people here, and speak a little of the language.

But it was a false alarm...it was a young couple vacationing...the young man happened to be a redhead....

Oh Charlie...come back....I wish I just knew he was safe. Well tomorrow is the last day to really start panicing. If he's not back by tomorrow, we're alerting the Ministry. Dumbledore really doesn't want to...but it's going to be nessary.

The Ministry's going to have to let others know He-who-must-not-be-named is not just in England anymore.....Missing since last Sunday....where could he be?

I don't want him to have been taken! He can't!! He just can't! He has to be alive! He just has too!

Looking....with some hope

lizblack — Mon, 13 Sep 2004 21:26:54 GMT

Tonks did come, she's here now. We still haven't heard hide nor hair of him. Moody thinks it was you-know-who himself that took him. Tonks keeps reassuring me that that is ridiculous. He-who-must-not-be-named has no idea who are Order memembers and who aren't. Especially one so far away from England.

I've let myself go a bit. Tonks about forced me to eat and shower (I know two nights doesn't seem like a big deal to not shower...but here at the reserve where it's dirty and grimy....it is). She keeps telling me everything is fine. That he just is really upset right now and needed time away.

I just can't imagine him not telling anyone that he was leaving. Charlie has a strong sense of responsibility, and that's just not like him. This is so hard. It's almost harder then knowing he's really dead....god if he is....

You think of so many horrible things when you don't know. I'd almost him rather be dead then him have to go through the things my head keeps coming up with.

I think the most calming thing is, however, is that Dumbledore doesn't think we should really panic until he's been missing for about four days. He's been gone two now...I can't imagine how worse I'll feel if he hasn't come back by Friday.

Tonks said that Snape should hear something soon, if they have taken him. He is in the Inner Circle...and it wouldn't be a small thing if they kidnapped a Weasley. He-who-must-not-be-named probably (or this is what Mad-eye keeps saying) has a good idea that most of the adult Weasley's are in the Order. It would be silly if they weren't. But to make such a bold move this early in the game, Tonks and Diggle think would be ridiculous.

We'll just see...I hope it is just the fights.

If he comes back in one piece, alive and well...I will love him and never ever fight with him again.

All is lost

lizblack — Sun, 12 Sep 2004 16:23:18 GMT

We think Pan...died. We can't find him anywhere. But too top it all off Charlie's missing. He hasn't been seen since last night. And the person only thinks it was him.

I know we've been arguing...and we've been on really bad terms...but I love him, and he's gone. I've never been so sick with worry in my life. I just wish...before he disappeared that I had told him....Merlin I don't know what to do. I've informed Dumbledore and he's sending some Memebers out to do a search. He promised me Tonks...I think he knows I need her right now...

I lost Sirius, I can't lose Charlie....I just can't.

Gone?

lizblack — Wed, 08 Sep 2004 21:54:37 GMT

Pan is still missing. We've looked every where. I've had him since I was a fifth year at Hogwarts (a.k.a. I was 15). I'm really worried. I want to know where my cat is!

A Missing Friend, Cat, and Heart

lizblack — Tue, 07 Sep 2004 18:13:44 GMT

Seeing as how I couldn't stay in my room for the rest of my life...I'm out of it. Doing my buisness once again. Working and such...

I wish I knew of someway to contact Lynn...I hope she is alright after what they all said...those horrid things...

I have been avoiding Charlie at all costs. In fact I hardly see him at all...even though we do live in the same hut. I believe he may also be avoiding me. Which I am perfectly content with. Seeing as how I loathe the dragon right now.

I am worried about my cat, Pan...I haven't seen him since before we went to Diagon Alley...I wish I knew were he went off too. It's not safe in the dragon reserve for a cat to go wandering off. Mellony swore she'd help me look for him if he hadn't shown up by tomorrow though.

A***hole

lizblack — Sun, 05 Sep 2004 21:04:17 GMT

For the love of Merlin, I really hate that boy...I have not in fact left my room. But he's out there. Just sitting there, staring at my door....I know he is.

But his an arsehole, and I don't want to talk to him. I haven't decided if I even want to stay here. Either this fight is going to end in a total seperation or the greatest snog I've ever had in my life.

And right now I'm so angry...no, I shouldn't say things like that.

He has made me think. I have been still, subconciously, stuck on Sirius. Yes, I love Charlie Weasley...but Sirius was my true love...even if Charlie is my soul mate, they aren't the same two things.

(I sound ridiculously girly) But how can he expect me to be over Sirius already? It's only been--around--three months. Some people take their whole lives to get over someone. He's lucky I was ready at two, and I'm not...not totally ready, which he's picked up on. I think he wanted me to just get over him in a snap.

Well, it just doesn't happen like that, not when you love someone as long as I love him...

But even besides this...Lynn. I have never heard someone be so mean to a person just because of their family. I can't believe Charlie. It was rude, and hurtful, and he's a bastard for it! (no offense Molly, Arthur) I hope Lynn is doing alright...

I trust her, Fred trusts her, Bill trusts her, the people that matter trust her. Charlie doesn't matter, George doesn't matter. Dumbledore does, and that's all that matters.

My arsehole of a boyfriend can go **** himself.

Pure-blood isn't a bad thing

lizblack — Sat, 04 Sep 2004 09:44:46 GMT

So we went to Diagon Alley yesterday...and I hate some Weasley's right now.

We went, Bill, I, and Charlie we're having a good time. Then we headed to Weasley Wizarding Wheezes' and only George was working. We were talking to him when Lynn and Fred showed up. (They were holding hands, but I think only I caught it) Then things got tense. George was pissed at Fred for not being at work, Charlie was uncomfortable with Lynn around (because she's a Malfoy) and Bill and I were trying to calm everything down.

So I suggested eating. Lynn had us go back to the Leaky Cauldron (where she was staying) and we started eating dinner there. That's when things got ugly. George made this half amused but mostly angry comment about Fred and Lynn dating...this brought on a huge fight.

Charlie was the biggest asshole on the face of this planet. And managed to get Lynn to storm out of her OWN room, wherein we continued to argue, he brought up Sirius...in a bad way...and then I stormed out.

Here, this is what happened after Lynn left:

“Your all the biggest bunch or assholes I’ve ever met!” Liz yelled at George and Charlie, who had been extremely rude to Lynn over a stupid trifle. Fred glared at his two brothers, unhappy with what they had said, and the fact they'd made Lynn leave. With a huff he decided to follow the girl and stormed out of the room as well.

For a while no one said anything. The four were angry at one another, and it was not a pretty sight. Bill, especially exsaperated spit out: "I’m disappointed in you two…you’re acting like children."

“I can’t believe you trust her Bill. She’s a Malfoy! And a Lestrange!!” Charlie yelled back, he didn't trust many pure-blood these days. Especially those two families who were known Death Eaters.

“SO?! Sirius was a Black!! He was obviously on our side! And Lupin is a werewolf!” Bill replied back, his ears were going red from anger and his fists were clenching.

“SIRIUS WAS IN AZKABAN FOR 12 YEARS!!!”

That did it for Liz. She couldn't believe Charlie had said something like that. With a high pitched yell, hiding her angry tears, she screamed back,“AS AN INNOCENT MAN!!!” And then stormed out of the room with the other two.

As she did she heard a “God dammit, Charlie your being a pain in the arse.” From the oldest Weasley.

That was all she heard as she stormed out into the dark streets of Diagon Alley. Many had started to head back home, or were staying in the Leaky Cauldron for the evening. So for the most part she had the streets to herself.

She was walking pretty fast, holding back angry and hurt tears. She heard some voices to the side as she continued to walk--sounded like Lynn and Fred--but she ignored them. She was just as upset. Charlie had fought against Lynn...she knew he didn't totally trust her...but he hadn't needed to be so rude. Then, then...to meantion Sirius...as if he'd done something wrong. That it had been his fault he'd been in Azkaban even though Charlie knew he was innocent...still managed to bring that in.

She hated him so much. Charlie had no right, no right to say things like that. He hadn't know...he didn't know....she was angry. So angry. But the sobs were filling up to easily, she needed to stop; recompose herself. Leaning against the side of a brick wall she laid her head back. Looking up at the cloudy sky. She noticed that it was just right after a full moon.

Smiling to herself, slightly, tears welling up in her eyes she wondered what Remus and Tonks were doing. Then decided she didn't want to know. That's when she heard footsteps against the cobblestone path. She had a good idea who they were and striaghted up walking fast in the opposite direction.

"Liz!" He yelled, his voice was low, almost in a husky tone...but not hucky in any sexual way...it was more anger than anything else. She didn't turn around only kept walking, her head held high, tears refusing to come down. "Elizabeth Rei!"

That actually stopped her in her tracks. How does he know my middle name? The thought puzzled her, almost to the point she forgot she was upset, until he reached her and spun her around to face him.

"God dammit Lizzie!" He seemed to lose some of his anger while looking at her. It drained from his face, but only for a moment. She was to worked up, to upset, to let him get away with what he'd done.

"Charlie! I-I...I hate you! I can't believe you'd say such nasty things! Lynn is my friend, and Dumbledore's friend, and FRED'S GIRLFRIEND! I thought you'd be nicer, I thought, even if you didn't trust her, you'd be at least friendly, and not so...rude" She spat out. He opened his mouth to yell back, but she cut him off. "And that could have been OK, I could have understood that...but you then meantioned Sirius. Not only did you meantion him, BUT YOU PRACTICALLY CALLED HIM A DEATH EATER!!!!! He is dead, yes, he was in Azkaban for twelve years, but as an innocent, AND I LOVED HIM! JUST BECAUSE HE DIED AND I LOVE YOU NOW DOESN'T MEAN I DON'T STILL LOVE HIM!

He doesn't deserve what you said, yes he wasn't perfect, but as I've just discovered, very largely, neither are you!" Liz poked him in the chest, quite hard actually and went to turn around and storm away again.

But he didn't let her, he had his own two-bits to stay and he grabbed her arm. Rather roughly, causing her quite a bit of discomfort. "You admit it then! You admit your still in love with him! Maybe I can't condone you for that...and maybe I shouldn't...but I do!" She opened her mouth to yell at him again, but he covered it, looking right into her grey eyes. "But not for the reasons you think...because you still do, you don't love me" She glared "Not fully. Your still caught on him, still sometimes hope...wish he was still here. I can feel it. When we kiss, you hold back...you always hold back. Like you can't quite stand me. Well I'm done with that! Maybe I shouldn't have brought him up, your right about that. But I'm bitter, I hate him! He's still got a hold of you! AND HE'S DEAD! YOU LET HIM HOLD ON TO YOU EVEN THOSE HE'S NO LONGER HERE!!! Let him go Lizzie! He's not coming back!!!! I'm right here, I'm trying everything, and yet you still hold back from me!"

Tears were running down her face now, she was so angry, now he was accusing her of not loving him. When she had given up everything to stay with him, she couldn't believe it. With all the strength she could muster she pushed away from him. And almost got away, he grabbed her wrist and looked at her.

But she couldn't stand it, without another thought she grabbed her wand with her free hand and apparated to the hut. As she opened her eyes, back in what she'd been calling home, a pop occured next to her and the red-head was standing next to her once again.

"Fuck you Charlie!" And she stormed to her room slamming the door. With a wave of her wand, she put up a locking charm and sat on her bed, crying.

At first he didn't say anything, though she knew he was right outside her door. Then he yelled: "HATE ME ALL YOU WANT LIZ BUT I STILL LOVE YOU!"

"WELL IF YOU LOVED ME YOU WOULDN'T HAVE TALKED ABOUT SIRIUS THE WAY YOU DID! OR TALKED TO LYNN THE WAY YOU DID!!! YOU DON'T LOVE ME CHARLIE, YOU DONT' KNOW WHAT LOVE IS!!!"

"I KNOW IT BETTER THEN YOU! You who thought someone who just wanted physcial compainion ship, for only a little while, was love! You who thought pity WAS LOVE! YOU DON'T KNOW IT ANY BETTER THEN I DO!!"

And the fight continued throught the night. Until we both screamed ourselves asleep. He's probably outside my door right now sleeping...or waiting for me to come out...but I'm not...Not right now. Not when I think the first thing I'm going to do when I see that freckled face is hex it into the next Dragon age....

Perfection

lizblack — Thu, 02 Sep 2004 15:49:36 GMT

So Fluer...she's nice and all. Hard to understand... Really seems to like Bill...

Of Bloody hell! I hate her here! Charlie's actually doing really well not being "seduced" by her charms or anything. But she's this perfect little thing. Blonde, pale, tall, slender, graceful, young...it makes me sick!

I can't stand it. I feel like an ugly git next to her. And I can't believe Bill is dating her! She's only 19!!! Bill is like what, 29? That's a ten year diffence! How could he even think she's...

Calming down, sorry. I just have felt all day that I have to compete with her. She's perfect in every way...and I'm well...not. I'm kind of short, my hair is dull black, no where near graceful, I have the nastiest cellulite on my thighs...ok not the nastiest...but it's there. I don't feel anywhere near Fluer.

And Charlie is trying really hard, I know he is. But she's half-veela...they just have this ...charm... about them. And I hate it.

I know I shouldn't, but I can't help it, it's the normal "girl's" jealousy kicking in.

Anyway, she leaves in about an hour...so it's fine. (Her and Bill are going out, then she's apparating home, and he's coming back here) Tomorrow, DIAGON ALLEY! ^_^

Hung-over

lizblack — Wed, 01 Sep 2004 17:45:38 GMT

Gah, my head is killing me. I woke up with a hang-over...and now I'm nursing it....and Charlie's. Bill went back to bed.

Fluer is coming tomorrow, Charlie finally told me what was going on with that. She's apparently half-Veela...so now I am not excited.

Anyway, had great time last night. The Candadians won, we went to some pub (whose name I don't remember) and it was a grand ol' party. Almost didn't get home. We had to take the Knight Bus back, we were all very very drunk.

Great times...I would put more up...but I really need to go to the bathroom...feel sick.

....Hate

lizblack — Tue, 31 Aug 2004 07:33:31 GMT

Stupid magic interferince!! Quidditch game, today, pub later, Thursday Fluer, Friday Diagon Alley. There. It was a nice update before...but whatever...

Lizzie

Long Vacation

lizblack — Sun, 29 Aug 2004 17:27:40 GMT

Bill comes tomorrow! I'm so very excited. We're going to the Quidditch game on Tuesday and on Friday (the day before he leaves) we're all going to Diagon Alley for shopping!

It's like this long wonderful vacation. Well, I don't have much else to write, so good bye for now.

Glad she's alright

lizblack — Fri, 27 Aug 2004 22:45:04 GMT

Well I'm glad to see that Lynn is still in fact alive and kicking. (If you need any help getting out I'm sure Charlie and I could send a nice dragon down there as a 'gift'.) And for heaven's sakes...if you want to marry the darn Weasley get to it! ...not that I can talk....

Let's see...Bill comes in two days. Fleur (the young french girl he's apprently seeing) wants to come over sometime while he's here. Charlie doesn't seem to keen on it, but he won't tell me why....Anyway, my Mum also wants to come down. Which is odd for her. She doesn't usually like to leave the neighborhood anymore. (I think it's because she some how got wind of Charlie and I's relationship...if I find out who told.....*coughTonkscough*) Mum's been wanting me to settle down and marry for quite sometime. And my mother, for all her oddities, this one is the oddest. She has been telling me to get on and marry a pure-blood. I don't understand. Of all people to talk, her! Marrying a muggle, loving muggles as she does... I'll never understand her.

I think she just wants to make sure she has grandchildren some day. The Longbottom line is being carried on through that cousin of mine...what's his name...Neville or something...but I think she doesn't see it as enough. (I've heard his quite a klutz in the magic department, almost a Squip or something, I think it's hogwash. I've never heard of a Longbottom without a strong magical power, his is probably just not developed yet.)

Yes, so, all about marrying a pureblood. She probably would have had a heart-attack if she'd ever known I had been 'seeing' a Black, the "royality" of wizarding kind. Also probably would not have been at all happy. He was a 'murderer' and all. (She about lost it when she found I had been writing to him in Azkaban)

Still taking things slow with Charlie...it's getting harder though. We do live in the same house...But I don't think I'm ready...I don't know. When the time comes, the time comes...and I'll know then.

Back to the Mum thing. I think we're going to try and have her up in Sepetember sometime. Maybe even October. When all the eggs have hatched, and all the dragons are much calmer. She never was much for magical dangerous creatures...

Weasley Animal Magnitism

lizblack — Tue, 24 Aug 2004 09:53:19 GMT

Well everyone is gone, and it's really quiet now. Almost too quiet. It's weird to get used to the lack of hustle and bustle of the whole family.

I wanted to talk about the whole Weasley experience, but there is just so much. I found that the two girls are absolutely amazing. I really got to know them better, Ginny is a lot like the twins, it's almost a bit frigtening.

I also talked to the twins about their joke shop. I'm going to have to visit soon. I wonder what I need to get from Diagon Alley? I'm sure there's somethings.

Talked a lot with Arthur as well. He thought it was fascinanting that I lived in a half and half home. Utterly fascinanting. Even more so because my papa was japanese, making it cross-cultural as well. So that was fun.

Hermione and Ginny reveled some secrets to me. And I don't feel right telling them on here. But it deals with boys, and Weasley Animal Magnitism. (I don't know where they got that from...Hermione said Ron's said it before, and Ginny says that the twins have been saying it for ages actually she said it's been around longer then she can remember. Charlie hasn't said it....yet)

Okay, this is a bit silly, but Charlie kissed me in front of his family. Granted they all weren't paying attention--it had been at dinner one evening--but the fact that he was so open about it...I don't know, it made me feel good inside. Sirius and I had to hide our relationship...and any before that, was at Hogwarts (yes I hadn't dated for awhile) and obviously none of that was going on in front of my mum. It wasn't a long kiss or anything, just a chaste peck, but enough that made me feel truely loved.

Side note: Fred would/did stare pointedly at us a lot. (And seeing as how I "know" about his "secret" relationship...I think I know why) He asked at one point if he could borrow Aristotle from me. He wouldn't tell me why...but I have an idea.

He's stranied, I can tell. I never knew the twins before Grimmauld...but I assume he was like George, and George's carefree attitude...and Fred's...it seems forced. Not all the time. But sometimes I'd see him just sitting there, eyes glazed, not at all like how I sometimes remembered him.

Then again, I know he has more to worry about then George. Lynn is a Malfoy, one obviously on our side...but she is stuck somewhere horrid...and very unsafe. Especially during these times. I think he's worried. And now that I meantion it, so am I. I haven't heard from Lynn in awhile, even on these journals. Maybe I should owl Lynn as well...

Redheads Galore

lizblack — Mon, 23 Aug 2004 13:24:23 GMT

So the Weasley's are here, and now they are getting ready to pack. It has been wild and crazy. And I wish I would have had time to write while they were here, but I did not. So tomorrow I will fill in more so with info.

That's it, and I must go back to helping pack, and then dinner at 7. Molly and I will be cooking in about an hour.

<3's Lizzie

Just a normal day at the reserve

lizblack — Tue, 17 Aug 2004 10:14:46 GMT

We're getting things ready for the arrival of the who Weasley clan. Charlie is throughly excited about having his family stay for awhile, as am I. It will be a bit awkward seeing how I'm only even remotely close to Molly and Bill...but I'll manage.

Mellony, a friend of ours, and the woman who owns the hut next to us, is going on vacation for a bit. So she offered them her hut. It is very gracious of her, and I'm going to have to thank her some how when she gets back. Maybe I'll take her to London for some shopping. It seems like a girly thing to do, and Mellony seems to enjoy that type of thing.

However, Mellony isn't the cleanest person around, so we've been scrubbing and tiding the hut for everyone--especially Molly, who'll have a fit if she see's it otherwise--and we have to find her cat. It's a half-kneazle, ugly gold thing running around. We think it hid when she left. I just hope we find it before they come, last thing I need is for the twins to find it while there here.

Besides that, things are average. Charlie had an accident a bit ago with the Ironbelly. But he's alright, thank goodness. We think we may have convinced a few Romanian wizards and witches from town to go talk to Dumbledore about the whole war. At least Yates seemed interested, as did Erglin. Can't say for sure however.

Bill's not coming up till the 30th, Gringotts wouldn't let him off and then he had a mission to take care of until the 29th, so he's coming here as soon as he finishs. That'll be exciting. We're thinking of going and seeing a Quidditch match. We think there's a match in Germany, Heidelberg Harriers against some team from North America, the Hairyburg Hammers or something. HH against HH. We thought that was funny.

Tomorrow Charlie and I are planning to go into the market, it's in a sweet little muggle town that I just adore, and get a few foods and things. Charlie even promised that we might stop for something to eat. So that's a bit exciting.

Broom lessons have been tiring. But I'm not nearly as bad as I started. And awkward touchs and things don't keep happening...other then that life is as normal as it can be at a dragon reserve.

The Blue Room

lizblack — Mon, 09 Aug 2004 14:25:59 GMT

We've started calling my room the 'blue room'. It's not even that blue. But it's a cute name, and it's nicer then 'Liz's room'. So that's fun. Had a run-in with Charlie in the bathroom today. That was interesting.

Lets see...Molly wants to come up with the family for a visit before the new term starts. So they probably are heading here on about the nineteenth and leaving the twenty-fourth. Gives Harry, Hermione, Ron, and Ginny time to get ready. By the way, everyone that's coming: Molly and Arthur (obviously) Fred, George, Ron, Ginny, Harry, and Hermione. Percy isn't coming. Last I heard everyone's still at odds with him. Bill said he'll try to come with them, but he doesn't think he'll be able to get time off...but he'd come down before or later if it wasn't possible to come with the family.

So that's exciting. Charlie is really happy, he hasn't seen everyone for awhile, and I am as well. I miss everyone, especially Molly.

Well, that's all that's been going on here. Aristotle just showed up with a letter. Should probably go read it.

Transvestite Dragon

lizblack — Sat, 07 Aug 2004 09:43:10 GMT

I have a horrid headache. It's so stupid that we can cure something like broken legs but can't help relieve something so simple as a headache. Although it has allowed me to be pampered.

I tried to do work earlier--my headache isn't that bad--but Charlie absolutly refused until my head stopped pounding. So I'm sitting here, bored out of my mind, but getting biscits ^^. That's always a plus. Charlie's pretty good at making biscits, must have learned from him mum.

We finished my room, by the way. It's a nice bluish color. I really like it. Not a lot of things are in it, but I don't like clutter anyway.

The dragon Charlie and some of the others here affectionally call Norbert laid a clutch yesterday. Which is interesting. It's name is 'Norbert' but it's a girl. Never quite got it. When I asked Charlie about it, he just shook his head and told me to just let it go.

Anyway, 'Norbert' had a good number of eggs, can't remember exactly how many, but it was a fair amount. The interesting thing is, is that it's a Norwegian Ridgeback, the only one here, so whatever are in those eggs are a crossbreed. Which, techniqually, if we had been breeding them on purpose, would be illegal, but since we don't control the breeding, and everything is al-naturel ^_~ it's not. So we're all a bit excited.

It'll be awhile however. Ridgebacks have one of the longest hatching times, or so I've been told.

Okay I'm rambling. I'm sorry. I just happen to love animals, and this is like my nitch. I'm glad I came back, and not even just because of Charlie. This is just where I belong altogether.

Well I think I'll go find Charlie and tell him my headaches worse so I can be coddled. Maybe he'll take pity and come play wizarding chess with me. ^^

Dragons, Kisses, and Strawberries

lizblack — Thu, 05 Aug 2004 16:33:52 GMT

I'll start it at the beginning, on Sunday 1st, August.

She was sitting amongst a field. Flowers were scattered here and there, but it was mostly tall grass and a gentle breeze. It was nice, the breeze. Tickling her skin and billowing her hair around.

She was enjoying the quiet, the tranquility, the peace. She laid back, letting the grass cushion her. Closing her eyes she let the smells and sounds over-take her.

The smell of honeysuckle mixed with crisp air tickled her nose and the buzzing of insects flew around her ears. One particularly loud bug seemed to be screaming at her. Not opening her eyes she tried to push it away with her hand. But instead it became more furious. She began to hear words in the screaming.

"Get...need...to strong...more...people...powerful magic..." Confused she tried to listen closely, only to get a large roar.

This jostled Liz up; she awoke, realizing she'd only been dreaming the field and grass, and the roar she heard was a dragon. The words, people yelling back and forth. Apparently a dragon had escaped the reserve. Quickly getting up, she threw on a sleeveless button down, khaki shorts, and pulled her hair back in a loose ponytail for probably the first time, and grabbed her wand.

Running out of the hut she saw the immediate problem. A Ukrainian Ironbelly, one of the largest dragons known to wizarding kind, had gotten loose. In fact the only Ironbelly the reserve had, had gotten loose. Most of the hands were already fighting with it. They'd managed to get a few ropes around it's feet and someone had stunned it, but the stunning was wearing off and it was fighting again. Liz, doing the only thing she could think of ran around the front of the beast and yelled "Stupefy!" hitting it right between the eyes. It fumbled, but the power of just her misele stunner did hardly anything. But a few others, catching on to this ran around her as well, and as one they all yelled "STUPEFY!" And the grey scaled animal came tumbling down.

Everyone else, thinking quickly, moved back; no one wants to have something like that fall on them. But Liz not thinking, didn't back up nearly far enough and had the large creatures head fall upon her, crushing her legs.

As she screamed out getting a few people to come over to her. The main on being a redhead by the name of Charlie Weasley.

"Lizzie, are you alright?!" He asked worriedly.

"Does it look I'm alright?!!!" She hissed through clenched teeth.

"Right...Help me get his head off of her!" He yelled and three others came over to him and on three they pushed the dragon's head off her legs. Liz bit her lip, it hurt just as much to have the weight taken off as it did to have it on. But she didn't cry just bit her lip. Charlie looked down at her, concerned. "Lizzie...can you move your legs?" She shook her head 'no'. Charlie bit his lip as well then, thinking.

Finally he came to a decision. The other three standing around looked at him as if waiting for orders, he looked up at them and told them to help everyone else. That he'd take her to the medi-hut. They nodded. As they left Charlie turned back to the petite woman in pain. "Lizzie, I'm going to pick you up, I'm going to be as careful as I can, but I can't say you won't feel any pain. We're going to the medi-hut, OK?"

Liz nodded her eyes wet, but she refused to cry. Carefully Charlie put an arm around her back, and even more carefully under her knees. As he began to lift her just flinched and made a small grunting noise and he stopped. "Alright?" He asked.

"Alright" She nodded back. He began to lift her again, and as softly as he could he headed toward the medi-hut.

* * *

Liz had passed out during there walk to the medi-hut, but now blinking away the light that was paining her eyes. She was able to see and realize that she was fine. Her legs had been healed perfectly. And while they were a little tingly, she could move them and they felt no pain.

Charlie, noticing she was up, quickly stood up from his chair, bustling over to her. "Lizzie," he paused he looked like he wanted to hug her but stopped himself. "You alright?" He asked looking concerned.

She nodded. "I'm fine Charlie, a little tender, but other then that fine. How long have I been out?" Charlie smiled.

"About five hours."

"What?!" Her jaw dropped. It had only been noon when she'd gotten up it was five in the afternoon then. She sighed. "I had so much to do today and now it's all been wasted." She swore under her breath, looking down at the rough berber sheets. Charlie smiled slightly and this time did hug her.

"We were so worried about you Liz. I was so worried. Before Healer Galen could even see you, you had passed out from the pain. Lizzie...I, I..." He pulled away from her looking at her emotionally. Liz tilted her head a little looking back at him.

"Char-" She never finished because he leaned in and kissed her. It was soft and hard at the same time. It caused her to tingle throughout her whole body. He tasted like strawberries, and was both gentle and rough with her lips at the same time. It was the most amazing thing she'd ever experienced.

She could feel ever emotion of his through this one kiss. His fear, joy, confusion, his gentleness, his heart...his love. She pulled herself away from him. He looked at her hurt.

"Lizzie?"

"Don't..."

"What?"

"Don't...go away, I dont' want to see you..."

"But....Lizzi-"

"No...go...leave me alone." Her eyes began to burn. "Seriously Charlie go away."

He could see her eyes welling up, but also saw her fists clenching. He nodded. "Alright...don't do anything drastic..." He said, hurt. And it hurt her, to know she was hurting him. But only for a moment. As he left the room she felt anger. Anger at herself, anger at him, anger at Sirius.

Throwing the blankets off of her she tested her legs, finding they could hold her and stormed out, heading toward her hut. She was going to get away from this place, from Charlie, from these feelings.

* * *

Liz began throwing her stuff into her bags, she couldn't believe what happened. How dare he kiss her, how dare she enjoy it... Sirius is just over a month dead. How could I disgrace his memory... She continued chucking her belongings into the trunk not bothering to use magic. This is Dumbledore's fault. If he hadn't made me come out here. He knew what he was doing. He knew exactly what he was doing With the last of it packed 'Locomotor trunk!' she lifted the trunk and stormed across the dry, dark reserve. Her hair was falling out of it's loose pony tail and into her eyes but she had no time to care about that. All she could think of was getting out of Romania and back to Grimmuald Place. Unfortunately for her she was too worked up to Apparate and the only floo fire on the reserve was, of course, on the other side of it.

Looking a mess with her hair all over and her shirt half un-tucked, she stormed the ground with her trunk just in front of her. She was nearly to the fire when she heard someone coming up behind her and knew only too well whom that must be.

"Bugger off Weasley." She said through gritted teeth.

"Lizzie stop this!" He called after her.

"Stop calling me that!" She said quickening her pace. She reached the fire and set her trunk down looking for the container of Floo Powder.

"Looking for this?" She wheeled around to see Charlie holding the container and looking worse for wear.

"Give it over Charlie." She said, hellfire in her eyes.

"I'll give you the powder Liz, but you're going to listen to me first."

"NO I'M NOT!"

"You can't go anywhere without this, so you haven't got a choice."

"I'll Apperate."

"You're being foolish, you are far too angry to Apparate , you'll end up in Siberia, and you're not dressed for that."

"BLOODY HELL CHARLIE! I AM LEAVING!"

"No you aren't Liz! You can't just leave. I WON'T LET YOU WALK AWAY!"

"Listen Charles Weasley, I loved him and I am not ready to deal with--with whatever the hell this is. Give me the damn powder!"

"LIZ HE'S DEAD! I KNOW HOW YOU FELT BUT HE'S DEAD! YOU WERE TOGETHER FOR A WEEK! I LOVE YOU ELIZABETH! I am alive, flesh and blood and my heart is beating for you." She thought that she may have seen tears in his eyes, but the wind was fanning the fire and she couldn't be completely sure. "I have cared for you longer than Sirius realized you were a woman. I was there for you through all of this and I am sorry that I expressed those feelings, but they are raw and they are true. I don't know what to do Lizzie..."

"Give me the box Charlie." She was crying. She was crying for a dead Sirius, a lost love, and a confused heart. All she wanted was to be away from here. "Give me the box."

"Lizzie..."

"Charlie, I am serious. Save me my dignity and give me the powder." He extended his hand, trembling, and she snatched the box. Liz grabbed her trunk and stepped into the fire facing him, her other handful of floo powder.

"Lizzie... don't do this" He pleaded, tears spilling down his face. "Please"

"Number 12 Grimmuald Place" and she was gone.

* * *

She stepped from the fire with her trunk, bewitching it again. With her other hand she wiped the soot and tears from her face and made towards her room. She only got as far as the entry hall though.

"Go back Elizabeth." Liz stopped dead in her tracks, tears still pouring down. "Take it from an old lonely man, when real honest love is staring you in the eyes, don't run from it. You may never have this opportunity again. Go back..." Liz thought she saw tears welling up behind the half moon spectacles.

"I can't" she whispered.

"You can. Be honest with yourself sweet girl."

* * *

Liz paced her room at Grimmauld. Dumbledore was right, she should go back, but she wasn't ready. She couldn't be ready. Sirius had only been gone a month and two weeks. Hardly long enough to mourn someone you'd loved for most of your adult life.

But at the same time, when Charlie had kissed her...it had never been like that with Sirius. She could actually feel Charlie......It had been amazing. It felt so much more right with Charlie...And that felt wrong in a way.

She had loved Sirius for so long, but had never really been anything to him for almost as long. But with Charlie...he saw her, not a little girl who he used to play with like Sirius. It might be working for Lupin and Tonks, but with them...as Liz was starting to finally realize, it wasn't, hadn't. They were happy for that week. But would they have stayed happy? Charlie loved her for who she was, not for someone she had been in a letter.

It hurt to realize that. She wanted to pretend that if Sirius had lived they'd be happy and in there own little world, but...she couldn't...not with all the things people were making her realize. Sirius was Sirius. He would always have been Sirius. No matter what he went through. And she was, had been, just a pretty girl to snog.

Going back meant she'd have to accept that. To stop denying it. To everyone. And that was a big thing to let go.

She was still pacing and thinking when a voice from downstairs called her. Looking back in her mirror she wiped her eyes, ran her fingers through her hair, straightened out her shirt and headed down the stairs with a 'coming!'.

Opening the door to the kitchen she was surprised by what she saw. Bill, Tonks, and Molly were sitting around the table looking at her.

Tonks stood up. "Liz, we all have something to say to you, and you better listen...you've got most of the Weasley family to deal with if you don't." Liz nodded, a bit frightened. "Alright, Bill?"

"Lizzie, go back. My little brother deserves something, and so do you. Go back." Bill said quietly.

No one then said anything for a few moments, then Tonks walked up to her best friend. "Wotcher, Liz..." She smiled slightly.

"Wotcher Tonks." Liz replied.

"Go on back, it'll be good for ya. You need 'ta stop cryin', and mournin' over Sirius. He'd understand." Liz nodded.

Molly was the only one left. She just stood there for a while, her hands cupped and fidgeting. Finally she burst into tears and threw her arms around Liz. "Oh dear! I know your so hurt but...oh dear...my poor poor dear. Please go back...he's hurt too." And Molly just stood there, hugging her and crying. Liz tried not to cry as well.

Finally the two seperated and as Molly wiped at her eyes, Liz smiled half-heartedly.

"Alright, I'll go back you've all convinced me. I kind of miss the dragon anyway." Everyone laughed.

"I'll help you pack your things, dear." Molly offered, but Liz blushed.

"I hadn't really...well, you see...I hadn't unpacked yet..." Molly smiled.

"Well then, best be on your way then." Liz nodded.

* * *

With a 'pop' Liz stepped out into the moor she had grown accustomed too. No one was around. Quietly she headed back to the hut Charlie had lent her. Reaching the door, she opened it, quietly, and stepped in.

It was dark inside. With a flick of her wand she said 'lumos' and the tip of her wand lighted the room. The huts may have looked small from the outside, but inside it was more like a good sized flat. A hall led to two bedrooms and one was still half done. They had been cleaning it and organizing it before she'd left. Dropping her things by the couch she'd been sleeping on she wandered to the back hallway to see if Charlie was in his room, or if he was on night duty.

Walking to the door on the right side of the cramped hallway she knocked lightly. She got no answer. "Charlie?" She whispered. "Charlie are you in there?" Quietly she opened the door, peering in.

Opening the door she found it dark, but empty. Staring at the bed she thought deeply about something and after a few minutes came to a conclusion.

Nodding to herself she set about her plan.

* * *

Charlie walked in exhausted. He had thrown himself deepily into work to forget everything that happened the past few days. Wanting to just go to bed and sleep his troubles away, he headed toward his room taking his shirt off and throwing it on the floor, deciding that, in the morning he'd worry about it.

Scratching his cheek he opened his door and yawned. In mid-yawn he heard: "Charlie" in a low, potent tone. He stopped and opened his eyes, not closing his jaw.

"Liz?" He said swallowing as he stared at her.

"Charlie" She replied.

He didn't say anything for a moment, but crossed his arms as if embarressed. Her mouth twitched into a smile that was gone in an instant. "I...I thought"

"Thought what?" She asked. He became silent again. She looked at him pleadingly.

"Why are you here?" He asked, afriad she'd only forgotten something and had only come back for that; but if that was true why was she sitting on his bed.

"I...well, lots of reasons." She stopped. They were both silent for a moment.

"Um...what reasons, if you don't mind me asking."

"Dumbledore told me for one," Charlie's face dropped slightly, "And your family pretty much didn't leave me much choice..." His face fell even more. "But mostly because, even though they told me and begged me, it was, in the end, my decision, and I realized, I'd never be happy living in that house all alone...Remembering only a week's worth of memories...and having to wonder, even if he had lived, if we'd have stayed together after the war...when I could come back here...knowing I'd be happy...be making new--and better--memories..." She smiled as she said, a few tears running down her face.

Charlie just stood there. He was amazed. He couldn't move with this information running through his head, instead he continued standing there, dumbfounded.

"Charlie?" Liz asked finally. He looked at her. "Are you going to at least hug me or just stand there?" His face began to beam into the smile Liz recognized, and she smiled back. Charlie walked over to her and wrapped his arms around her frame, holding her as tightly as he could. "Er...Char'e...I ca't bre'th" She whimpered out, laughing and gasping. He pulled away.

"Sorry..." She smiled.

"S'lright Charlie." He smiled back at her. He then leaned forward...but stopped, pulling back. He didn't want to make that same mistake again. But Liz seeing him falter leaned forward as well, kissing him gently. Pulling away she smirked. "You know Weasley, you taste like strawberries..."

He just smiled at her.

And now, at the end. Things are taken slowly. I will not ruin something so wonderful by moving to fast. I will never, ever, ruin it again.

The 3 E's

lizblack — Wed, 04 Aug 2004 20:08:33 GMT

I...I'm to tired to explain. Everything has just all happened. And the story, since I didn't explain anything is a long one...and I'm just to exhausted to tell it all right now. I'm emotionally, physically, and mentally exahusted. Hopefully I'll be able to tell everything tomorrow.

Good night.

I HATE HIM!

lizblack — Sun, 01 Aug 2004 16:21:49 GMT

I HATE CHARLIE WEASLEY! I hate him, I hate him. I dont' know how else to put this, but he kissed me...he BLOODY kissed me!!!! And I ENJOYED IT FOR GOD'S SAKES! SIRIUS HAS ONLY BEEN DEAD FOR BARELY A MONTH!

I have no right to enjoy anything like that...I have no right.

I'm going home. I can't stay here. I can't be around something like this. Sirius is dead; I loved him, I still love him. I have no right to fall in love before he's even been truely mourned.

I don't care if Grimmauld place is haunting, I'm going back there. I'll be away from that prat Charlie.

I don't care if Dumbledore sent me out here as if it was a mission. He did it on purpose. I'm sure Charlie even requested me...Asshole. I'm going to pack now and floo home.

That's it, said and done.

I hate him, I don't love him, I hate him for doing this to me.

Strawberry Kisses

Quick note

On Eggshells

Explainations, Recuirts, and Sorrow

A Storm Dragged In

Gone to the Ministry

A lead.....that ended in failure

Looking....with *some* hope

All is lost

Gone?

A Missing Friend, Cat, and Heart

A***hole

Pure-blood isn't a bad thing

Perfection

Hung-over

....Hate

Long Vacation

Glad she's alright

Weasley Animal Magnitism

Redheads Galore

Just a normal day at the reserve

The Blue Room

Transvestite Dragon

Dragons, Kisses, and Strawberries

The 3 E's

I HATE HIM!

Looking....with some hope