I do not have infinite knowledge

lipsofpoison @ 2009-08-19T23:12:00

2009-08-19T23:10:19Z

OKAY. READ THE COMICS. SO.

Streets of Gotham

- God, Damian! You've gone from this two dimentional spoiled brat to this three dimentional spoiled brat who obviously is now looking up to Dick as a brother, rather than a father. I think he's seeing him as a mentor and seems to like Alfred being around (as opposed to swearing at him) so it's like, yeah, he's not Tim and he's a little brash for a Robin. He's more of a Jason!Robin and I think he'd probably make a better Whitehat!Talon because I think Robin is what he envisioned as his duty and birthright and I think maybe what he needs is Dick for his individuality and understanding as I'm not sure he could ever function with Bruce!Bat as a Robin. For now, I'm happy with things but I'm waiting on Bruce coming back to pass judgement.

- Lousy chess player. Dude, Damian your puns are coming from Dick and they're lovely to see. Keep rubbing off on him, Dickiebird.

- "Please give me thirty seconds. No weapons." "I said that's ENOUGH." Dick is wonderful. I'm totally fangirling.

- "Cut the crap" Oh Dickie, I love you.

- "Old chum" LOL Elliot. I'm liking you.

- I like the way people are dressing. Dick and Damian look so normal and not out of place.

- "Criminals are a supersitious, cowardly lot." "That's the dumbest thing I've ever heard." Oh, I'm really loving the boys relationship.

- The JLA/JSA/Outsiders showing up was EPIC WIN.

- "Don't tell me you're crushing on Katana" He's following in your footsteps, Dickiebird.

- Loving Dick's new car. The red is very him.

Batgirl #1
- dsgjhdsjhgd STEPH. See previous post for reactions there. So pleased.

- Loving the idea of Babs becoming a mentor for all of the girls. Steph needs her guidance. Wendy needs her support. Cass is now finding her own identity without Bruce which I totally support. Misfit as 'a secret' but didn't appear. I'm guessing Babs' bitches is a go.

- Gold and eggplant colour change. Wonderfully transitioned and can't wait for the new costume.

- Mrs Brown wins at life. She's Joyce Summers, basically. Loving her.

- Big LOL at Steph's room. The pictures of her and Steph, her and Tim, Robin and the Robin symbol. Doesn't Tim!Robin look so much like DCAU!Robin?

- Steph, why are your bedcovers purple? Purple would look dumb!

- LOL Post it notes. Hello phoenixverse stuff. Mind you, she was always going to be Batgirl in PV (as I drew ages ago for Steph week) so big yay all over.

- I'm loving Leslie's mothering and the acknowledgement of Babs' issues. It's nice to see Leslie trying to deal with everything. I want Steph and Leslies interaction.

- Steph being at Gotham U is a big yay. And her doodling all the different bats is win. I'm loving Stephs 'Bats Through The Years' thing as she's grown up with Batman and Robin.

- Cass is being more open is a little strange but understandable considering the time that's passed. Loving her and Stephs relationship. The "behind you" and punching was brilliant.

- Dick's comment of "other Batgirl" is fabulous. It's not an instant "GO HOME STEPHANIE" which I love.

- Cass giving her Batgirl. I did so hope for that.

- Babs and her Dad is lovely. Him trying to set her up! Jim saying "little red headed mascot" is adorable and her reaction to Dick's call is a lovely touch.

- "Look out trash, here comes Steph!"

- Loving that Steph is the only one in her class without a laptop.

- Are we supposed to not ship Steph/Detective and Steph/Cass?

- I'm loving the Detective dude. I love the GCPD. "What? I'm new!" "Which one are you again?"

- Steph looking tough for the detective and she really is pulling off sounding like Cass.

- Batsignal Bat in the bathroom mirror! Squee!

- There's a colour coordination in this issue. Lots of purple/eggplant around Steph and lots of green for Babs. Loving it.

- I love the Browns house, especially the chalkboard and I love that Babs is so pissed off and yet, made her waffles (and is taking some herself).

- Loving that Dick recognised her as Steph. Totally thinking he did before she decowled. The idea of a Steph and Dick influenced Damian makes me very happy. If anyone can make him more awesome, they will do it!

lipsofpoison @ 2009-08-07T18:53:00

2009-08-07T18:07:05Z

Cinema points
- The cinema was totally packed with real harcore fans. Some people were dressed up, nearly all the seats were filled and eveyone was talking about the books. It was a great atmosphere.
- RDJ looks to be really good in Sherlock Holmes. Not traditional but it looks really fabulous.
- They had a trailer on before it and it said "Solve the Mystery of the Half Blood Prince. I wanted to be like, "Yes, read the book!"
- Time Travelers Wife looks really mawkish, but Eric Bana is damned attractive.

- It was a very GoF style opening, but had gorgeous flashes to the newspapers doing pictures of Dumbledore and Harry. I really felt for him. It felt nicely post OotP.

- The opening was epic. Don't get me wrong, I love Kingsley and missed him but that scene in London with the Death Eaters on the brdige was beautifully done. The part they flit in and out of the clouds and invisibility shows the plausibility of it all.

- The Dark Mark made out of clouds = AWESOME

- Harry reading the Daily Prophet in a cafe, having been riding on trains because he's taken to riding the train.
Waitress: Who's Harry Potter?
Harry: Bit of a tosser, really.
And Dumbledore thought the waitress was attractive and apoligises for dragging Harry away.

- Dumbledore showing up in front of a sign for pink perfume with DIVINE MAGIC was a win.

- There's a great emphasis on Dumbledores hands. It's quite impressive.

- Side apparition is done very impressively. I felt a bit sick too!

- They did Slughorn turning from the arm chair! It was wicked. The way they did that entire sequence was very impressive, particularly Dumbledore waving his wand and setting the house back to normal with a "That was fun. Can I use the loo?" They also kept in knitting patterns, which is a big yay.

- Dumbledore: I suppose you're wondering why I've brought you here.
Harry: Actually, sir, after all these years, I just sort of go with it.

- The blood dripping on the Prophet (on Harry's picture) and then the blood from the ceiling dripping was brilliantly echoed.

- Dumbledore tasting the blood. Dumbles = Benton Fraser and/or possibly the Doctor.

- The referencing of Sirius and Regulus was done word for word, from the book.

- The photograph of Lily, she's still looking too old but the story about her turning a petal of a Lily into a fish that disappeared the day she died.

- Slughorn wanting Merryweathers Office is a big fat win!

- The collecting people is both creepy and very appropriately done.

- Is it just me or has The Burrow gotten fancier? The thing with Ginny was hilarious, especially Molly's "Don't you think I'd know if Harry Potter was in my house?"

- Nice to see Crookshanks back again.

- It was nice that Arthur put his footdown about the kids going back.

- "Dumbledores not old...how old is he?"
"150, give or take."

- Bella and Cissy at Snapes house. Cissy looked ridiculous but sounded spot on. Bella was so perfect. I can't compliment Helena's performance enough. Her enjoyment, enthusiasm and childlike joy is everything I adore about Bella and it's perfect.

- I really liked the actresses portrayal of Narcissa, even if she looked ridiculous. And what was with the meaningful looks at Snape? Are we supposed to ship them? ~~Cause I kind of do now~~.

- The fact they kiss kind of surprised me. I didn't expect the Blacks to be that affectionate but it's damn creepy, so I'm down with that. Bella is wonderfully manic with it so it works.

- Hermione is turned on by the smell of toothpaste. WIN.

- Ginny has gotten SO. TALL.

- Tonks/Remus. Loved it. They're like an old married couple, with her explaining why he's being such a prissy bitch tonight and taking charge. I wonder if it'll be their wedding we see instead of Bill/Fleur. The "sweetheart" is awesome.

- The heart imagery in this film was actually very well done.

- Harry/Ginny is actually quite nice. I was pleasantly surprised.

- There just isn't enough words for me to say how much In loved HBC in this. Her joy. Her squeals of 'I KILLED SIRIUS BLACK' had me laughing so hard. Her dismissals with Snape were wonderfully manic. That last bit in the Great Hall was just an epic win.

- Ginny with Greyback. He was criminally underused but the whole creepiness factor there was so awesome. So was Remus and Tonks running out.

- The vanishing cabinet was done really, really well.

- There is not enough compliments in the world for Tom Felton. I didn't actually like Draco in the books. I just couldn't visualise the regret, but the way he played it, with the beautiful silences and his running to the bathroom and the end with Dumbledore. Magnificent.

- Arthur being all Remus knowledgable is kind of sweet.

- Bella hissing. That's strange, creepy and oddly wonderful.

- The house going up in flames may not have been canon but I loved it. It was so spot on for what happened.

- "These girls, they're going to kill me." Ilu Ron.

- Won Won! Lavendar was just kind of fantastic. Absolutely dressed and sounding wonderful.

- The Ginny/Harry, Hermion/Ron friendship thingy was done well with the birds, even if it felt slightly out of place.

- DRAGON. BALLS.

- Snapes face when Cormac throws up. It's kind of amazing.

- Oh, Slughorn. I never expected to feel badly for him but JB is a perfect actor and the whole thing with Lily and the fish broke my effing heart.

- Aragog being kept was actually really nice.

- Luna. Just...Luna. Her relationship with Harry is still lovely. The fact she sleepwalks. Her lion costume.

- The split lighting on Draco was gorgeous.

- The bitten apple was downright creeptastic.

- Draco gatecrashing was kind of cringeworthy but I actually really felt for the guy. Damn you, TF.

- I really don't like that Draco didn't try to use the cruciatus. It feels like Harry using an unknown spell wasn't validated.

- Sectumsempra was very impressive. As was Katie Bell. Man, was that ever creepy. Hagrid coming along was really cool.

- Lav-Lav's drawing of the heart and Ron then talking about kissing. Are we supposed to not slash those two? My god, it's too easy! Harry trying to look distracted was really well done. And the lips CHAPPED.

- Waiter!Neville. Don't worry, you'll be bamf next year!

- Dumbledore is such a shipper AND a cockblock. Ron is a cockblock with PIE.

- Harry is learning emotional manipulation with Slughorn. Sirius would be so proud.

- I loved the clothes in this. Bella's were gorgeous, the purists were exactly what I imagined, Luna's HEADBAND, the gryffindor jumpers, the lions on the cloaks.

- Hermione and Harry have such a great friendship. I think I love that more than the shipping.

- I really liked the necklace. It was really well designed.

- "Why is it always you three?"
"I've been asking myself that for six years." Ron and McG for epic win.

- The LOOK Snape and McG share is kind of epic win.

- "She's got nice skin." You two are such boys.

- Cormac and his icecream. I LOLed.

- The thing of knowing Ginny had been crying was kind of epic.

- EMERGENCY CHOIR PRACTICE.

- Dean/Ginny snogging thing. RG did such a great job with Ron about this stuff. "That happens to be my sister!" and Hermiones later, "Just don't snog her in front of him."

- "All hands on deck, Granger!" I do like that.

- *snort* Wallenby.

- Cormac was epicly smarmy and well acted. I was impressed that I disliked him that much.

- I'm kind of going for the femslash with Ginny/Hermione. They were both fabulous in this.

- LOL at Ginny taking Harry's book.

- He sleeps with the book. And the Snarries just went WILD.

- Dumbledore asking about Harry/Hermione cracked me up. Especially with his whole young love thing later and Snapes disgusted look.

- "SHUT IT!" ilu Ginny.

- "Do you want me to let him collect me?" Damn creepy but very well acted.

- The kids who portrayed Tim Riddle were stunning. The acting in this film was just unsurpassed on all quarters.

- LOL at ickle Snape being a doodlebug.

- Oh Seamus. It's not you if you don't get set on fire.

- Was thet flubber I saw?

- "About time!" "Shut up." I do like that.

- Borgin and Burkes was in 1863? For some reason, I thought it would be older.

- The Romilda stuff was brilliantly acted, hilariously done and Ron trying to snuggle Slughorn was just brilliant. And Ron's "OH FUCK" face. Brilliant.

- The bit of him collapsing was actually pretty scary and funny at the same time.

- Harry has such an emo after Draco, but I'm glad he shares it. It just cements them.

- Ginny in the room of requirement, oddly sexy. I was very impressed.

- "Did you and Ginny do it then?" Oh this movie is so quotable.

- Harry. STONED. Oh my god, I just died laughing. I could quote the whole scene, it's so brilliantly done. His clapping.

- Fang mourning Aragog is really rather sweet.

- Drunk Hagrid and Slughorn for the epic winnage!

That's all I have typed up for now, but I really did love it.

Tim Drake: The Road to Red Robin Part 2 [11 scans]

2009-06-25T23:11:35Z

An Exploration Of Tim Drake, part 2. It's rambling and longish, focussing on who Tim Drake has become. For part one, go here.

The Road To Red Robin

Tim Drake has gone through a lot in his years as Robin. Taking the route of the academic Robin, he has learned the ropes in action and with Batman not wanting to take chances with his new Robin, he was even trained by an assassin. By all parts and purposes, Tim becomes a very ideal Robin: he's smart, witty and with some help from Dick, becomes very accustomed to dealing with Bruce.

Things started to look up for him, when his father came out of his coma and even when Bruce becomes hurt and he's driven out of their world, Dick pulls him back in by stepping into the cowl until Bruce can come back. Family life also improved: his father fell in love and married and despite the fact that his two lives cause him problems, he comes to terms with them and finds a balance. Things are thrown out of balance slightly when, as Robin, he begins to date Stephanie Brown, also known as the Spoiler. He cannot see her out of costume and despite trying to put her off the cape and cowl business, she sticks with him and the two become an item.

Tim even formed his own team of junior leaguers, much as Dick had formed the Teen Titans. Together with his closest friends in costume, he became the leader of Young Justice. Although he was offered membership to the Teen Titans, he was happy in his current role. This would later change when he would take charge of the Teen Titans and everyone would blend together.

Despite the occational batdickery, girlfriend trouble and troubles with two different lives, things were going alright up until his father became suspicious and find out he was Robin, causing Tim to give it up. This is when things began to really go to hell for him. Stephanie took over as Robin, only to be fired, tortured and killed. A week later, his father was killed and his stepmother had a breakdown. Six months later, his best friend Conner Kent is killed. Eight months later, good friend Bart Allen was killed. Then Bruce adopted him, but was subsequently killed. It's not hard to see a pattern here.

Now, judging that this all happened within the confines of five years, it's not hard to see why Tim might feel as if Robin is his lifeline. The appearance of Damian bothered him significantly and certainly, since Battle for the Cowl era, he has continually refered to himself as Tim Wayne. I was glad to see that played off.

Tim hasn't forgotten where he came from. He now has circular Red Robin birdarangs. He seems to be focussing on the gold and black, perhaps trying to focus on the contrast of light and dark. His fighting style is more like Jason's now, though more precise. His civillian look is more like Dick. I think Tim is losing Tim inside Robin and he's now suddenly realising a lot of his life skills that he should have learned were either learned too early for him to cope mentally or not learned at all, because of the paranoia and double life. Even going to Red Robin, a lot of his reactions, even as a civilian, are pure Robin. He's asking himself if Tim Drake would have done that and coming to terms with the fact Tim Drake, as a whole person, has not existed in some time and therefore, hasn't matured and coped with everything that's happed to him.

Tim notes that he has a lot of anger and aggression. It's not hard to see why. He feels cut off from the people he loves and hurt by them, either because they've taken things away from him or lied to him or even because they've died. He refers to a high profile kidnapping and just taking people out as 'stretching his legs'. It's clear to see Tim is having a 'fight and move on' attitude that was usually more suited to Jason, but for Tim, perhaps that's what Red Robin is about. He needs an outlet.

'Is there even a line to cross anymore? Does it even matter?' These are the words of a young man who has been continually beaten down by the world and it's worst people. This is a young man who has lost his faith in Batman and Robin, someone who's put all their hope in the knights of Gotham only to have his life destroyed. Robin was the last thing he had and despite everything, he did lose it and like any eighteen year old young man, he's bitter about it.

He wants to grow up, much as Dick did at his age. He's out of Gotham, but unlike Dick, he's alone so his bitterness and pain is growing rather than leaving him. He has a lot of problems here. He's depresonalising so much of this: refering to brutal fighting as 'interesting' and the men he's fighting as targets, as any assassin would. He's losing his soul in this so what I hope is that Tim will be finding his heart and soul over the next twelve months so that he'll remember his family, his heart and how good he is at what he does. He needs to accept himself, as most teenagers do and I look forward to his journey. I think Bruce will appreciate Tim having life experience when he returns and it's something he will want in a partner.

Tim's confidence has clearly been shaken by his identity crisis. I don't think it's a coincidence his mother and his father dying storylines were both named 'Identity Crisis'. Identity is hugely important to the Bats. I think their identities are likely both barriers and links; something that protects them (say, if Batman and Robin are fighting, does that mean Bruce and Tim necessarily are and vice versa?) and connects them and it feels like the connections of the family - Bruce, Dick, Jason, Tim, Steph, Babs, Cass and even Alfred have all had their connections shattered. My hope is that when Bruce is back, his heartfelt honesty in his tapes after he died will have had some effect and there will be a grouping together.

Tim is also employing that charming idea that if you say something enough times it'll be true, because he can't stand the thought that he's lost it all. He needs his hope. After all, isn't that what being Robin is all about?

I understand Dick's position here. When he was about Tim's age, he was ready to spread his wings but Dick is failing to account for Tim being Tim and not the same as Dick was at that age. Dick had the Titans and many years of closeness with his family; Tim didn't. Robin was literally everything to him and to have it taken away for the sake of a brat punk by the person he cared about most is such an echo of what Bruce did to Dick with Jason.

Tim clearly feels all the things Dick did in that position. Look at his body language. Before Damian comes in, he's defeatist while Dick is trying to hold things together and be the oldest, despite the fact we know how much he's hurting from Batman. Damian is true brat fashion and let's face it, Robin is a brat sometimes so I can cope with it, not to mention the fact Dick is actually trying to put a leash on the boy. He wants Tim has his partner and Damian as his sidekick. This is the difference in Dick's mind and it's everything he would have wanted at Tim's age, but Tim is not Dick. Robin was everything to him and now, he's not even allowed to be that.

Dick is trying to do damage control. Damian is making thing escalate and he's trying to relate to his brother. Tim is having a fight or flight reaction. He's panicking. He's been Robin for so long - how is he to be anything else? He was his hero and then he had to become his hero and his hate of Damian is clearly clouding his feelings about the Robin suit. Dick see's it as denial and I'm not sure he's completely wrong.

This is perfect. He's lost control, he's having to face up to everything that's happened to him over the last few years that he's been able to ignore by being behind the Robin mask and fighting the mission. He's suddenly realising that he is, once again, Tim Drake. He can get hurt and die, because he's no longer the symbol that Robin was.

Remember the symbols in his early days, from part one? Robin was unkillable, even when Jason had died. Now he's just Tim again and is trying to pick up the shattered remains of his life and he can't. It's hurting him to such a degree that he can't cope at all. Tim Wayne was supposed to be starting over, a new leaf and a new kind of Robin. Now he's just back where he was, afraid and hurting much as he was when his mother died where he had a similar reaction to this.

Quick note about the way Tim looks here: disheveled, hurt, hair messy - when was the last time we say Tim look like this. We haven't. Tim is clearly not taking care of himself (where's Alfred when you need him?) and it's obvious he's suffering. I honestly believe Dick was trying to help, but I think the only thing that will help is acceptance of himself and what's happened to him in the last five years. Hopefully, this is what Red Robin will be.

Tim's decision here seems to be one of a spark. It could be denial on one level but this is Tim. Tim is a thinker. He see's patterns other people miss and knows what he's doing. The shattering here and perhaps, even the blood could be an indication of what he's seeing (the shattering of universes or the corpse linking in) and Tim is single minded about his mission. He wants Bruce back and he knows he's out there. Tim can't help him - but Red Robin can. Robin could never comprimise his morals - Red Robin was Jason's. It had very little to do with morals.

He's terrified he might be wrong so he must look. There's so much of an echo of both Jason and Dick here. Dick, in that he's growing and certainly acting more like him as a civilian. As for Jason, there's an echo of the final part of under the hood here on a purely image level, which they do like to do with both Jason and Tim, where as with Dick it's an emotional level they echo each other with.

All in all, the road to Red Robin has been pretty clear once you go back. It's a good start to what I hope will be an excellent series as Tim leaves all the other aspects of Robin behind him and focuses on Tim for a change. Goodness knows, he's earned it. I know he can be a good man at the end of this and in the end, I think he'll find his family and his heart lie in Gotham.

lipsofpoison @ 2009-04-16T19:41:00

2009-04-16T18:44:18Z

So with all the information I've been collecting, I decided to try and do a Robin page that I can keep so I can always refer to it. I want to put a little opinion page on it, so flist, I'm asking you:

What is Robin to you?

lipsofpoison @ 2009-04-14T15:37:00

2009-04-14T14:42:49Z

Attention Role Players

I would appreciate of you would take the poll.

View Poll: base preferences

squealing

2009-03-27T13:03:20Z

Oh my god. Oh my god.

Someone is bringing Daredevil into capeandcowl. Someone is bringing Black Mask into capeandcowl. Someone is bringing Simon Tam into capeandcowl. jikeidannin is bringing Adrian Veidt into capeandcowl (good for you, our Watchmen peeps are lovely!) and someone is bringing in DCAU Bruce. Justice League Bruce wins at life.

alkskals; I'm way too excited now.

~~Pushes the random Mal Reynolds muse away cause oh my god, where did you come from~~

Making artz

2009-03-14T17:49:26Z

I don't do stuff from scratch often but I wanted to do a TDK!style Jokerz guy, but I can't decide on the lighting? Image has blood, possibly not safe for work. It's not done yet, but I could use the opinion, considering I've changed my mind three times in the last hour. Also not sure about the blood on the hand :/

One or two?

lipsofpoison @ 2009-03-13T18:22:00

2009-03-13T18:27:28Z

It's Comic Relief tonight and all I can think of is "This is prime Joker material", particularly DCAU!style Joker who really has an emphasis on the comedy. Every time I hear the slogan Do Something Funny For Money, I think of the bank scene in TDK.

Ugh, I thought I'd posted this: Sirius in PoA & GoF

2009-03-06T16:06:35Z

Reposted from my IJ, from about 6 months ago.

So in a mistake that caused me to lose another hour of sleep due to my thoughts on it, I read read throughs of PoA and GoF that I actually want to collect my opinion here. Wow, that took a lot of me. This thing took 2 days to write up and it's pretty long, so I'll warn people of that before they click.

This touches on: drinking and coping mechanisms, lack of knowledge of the Dark Mark, the Crouches, Azkaban and the effect of, Blurred Lines and blurred lines, Sirius' personality, Ron, the effect of growing up a Black, the Secret Keeper debacle, fanon!Sirius, guilt, Sirius' relationship with his friends, Severus Snape and the similarities, wizarding values oin relation to Azkaban and the effect oftelling Harry/Dumbledore/Remus/etc.

And instead picked up the flask of pumpkin juice and drained it. (459)

This has no particular reason for being the first thing other than it was the first thing I came across, but it's an excellent point. This, to me at least, speaks of a level of avoidance that seems (in BL at least and considering BL tends to feel very canon, I will be counting certain aspects on it) to be something of a family trait. This doesn't surprise me in an old purist family. They don't seem the type to want to talk out their feelings or to get things out in the open. There is something distinctly disturbing about it as well as, at least by my canon, this would have been the first vice to get into his system. I think probably drinking with James around that 14/15 mark probably lent itself to forgetting himself and losing control for someone who's life had been mapped out and controlled for most of the time. It may have been a way to rebel but I think, on a more basic level, he's more comfortable with internalising the things that are really bothering him, whereas when he's had a drop to drink, he tends to be a lot more angry and honest, which is why he views it as a coping mechanism for what little repression he has left.

One of the people points out "If he is drinking in GoF, I don't think he's yet become depressed. He's so much more vital (and sane) here than in the next book. It probably would've been better if he could've stayed on the run rather than been basically under house arrest." This is spot on, for me. He starts to lose it again in OotP because he's in a place he hates and where a majority of those bad memories probably came from, so while it kept him safe, it didn't do much for his sanity. There are definitely moments in OotP where Sirius seems more like a 16 year old than an adult and in GoF, he seems like more of an adult. I think for someone whois having trouble with his memories, a lot of that would be the fact he seems to be in more or less the same place here that he would have been at 16: trapped, fairly lonely, away from the people he cared about and stifled. It wouldn't be hard to see his emotions taking the same downturn.

'He showed Snape something on his arm?' said Sirius, looking frankly bewildered. [...] 'Well, I've no idea what that's about ...' (461)

And, of course, in BL canon it is. This is something I have struggled to believe consideirng the involvement the family has with all things DE related, but it does work if you think about it. With the Blacks, you have to read between the lines constantly and see what's not being said as opposed to what is. It's complicated but I'd think Sirius would understand it enough to be able to read into things enough to understand what was being discussed without it being obvious.

The Dementors buried him outside he fortress, I watched them do it.

'My mother died a short while afterwards in Azkaban. She was careful to drink Polyjuice Potion until the end. She was buried under my name, and bearing my appearance. Everyone believed her to be me.' (594)

I, for one, do not subscribe to the idea that there are human guards. The BL crowd suggested house elves and this certainly seems to be the general consensus for who did the cooking, cleaning, etc. As for what Sirius would have seen, again, if we go by BL canon, Barty and Regulus have a close relationship. He'd have known the kid on sight. While I'm sure he was pretty messed up with both the trauma of October 31st still very fresh in his memory and the effect of Azkaban itself, I think he'd have noticed them bringing out the body of someone he was at least familiar with via his association with his brother. To be honest, I don't believe there were other people there. That's not what I got from the line. It's possible other 'lifers' like Sirius saw it go by and they may well have been other DE's but I doubt there was a funeral of any kind.

I would say he became as ruthless and cruel as many on the Dark side.

I like this for a couple of reasons. One, it shows the blurred lines (ha!) between the two sides. While I'm sure Sirius feels contempt for the person who sentenced him, I imagine some of it is a detatched feeling simply from the "I would say" so I don't think it was just his opinion. Two, I think it shows that anyone can be corrupted by power, no matter whose side they're on. I think there is a slight third side to this in that Sirius obviously has huge problems with his own parents (as we see in the next book) so a lot of the disdain for someone who isn't treating their child right (I believe in BL he has refered to him as 'the ever highly strung Barty Crouch Jr') and pushing it beyond their limit sure as well would push a button for him.

Fundamentally, I see Sirius as a born User, someone who almost instinctively misrepresents himself and manipulates Harry for his own ends.

Now, this is written from someone who admits they hate the character so I'm only quoting the first part, but for what it's worth, I think it's true to a degree and has a lot to do with his upbringing. He isn't used to things being unconditional and has learned that if he wants something, most of the time, he has to twist things to get it. I imagine he's aware of this on some level, putting it down to being in a house of full of Slytherins and being able to hiss as well as most of them. I won't deny he's manipulative in his own way, but I don't agree with it being entirely selfish reasons. Some of them are. Some of it is him wanting James' forgiveness through his son and wanting his child to like him because he can't imagine what he'd do if he didn't like him; he'd be losing his one big link to James.

But by that same point, I do believe he geniunely wants to do the right thing but hasn't got a decent logic base. This is something that comes up a lot in BL, where he thinks he's doing the right thing by being manipulative and thus, it's okay to be so. I honestly think he's trying to protect Harry because he does adore him, if perhaps not for all of the right reasons and does the best he can with a deeply flawed base of thought.

'I thought you'd come and help your friend,' [Black] said hoarsely. [...] 'Your father would have done the same for me. Brave of you, not to run for a teacher. I'm grateful ... it will make everything much easier...' (249)

Something I've touched on many times in BL is that Sirius is deeply unforgiving, which is an interesting contrast to the fact that James forgives so easily. The guy really knows how to hold a grudge, to an almost obsessive anger that is being shown in PoA to the subtle jibes I tend to put in with BL. I think a part of it is that he tends to feel things so strongly himself that when he feels guilt over something, it's all encompassing so he assumes that other people should feel the same way. I think under the right circumstances, there would have been a lot less hatred there. Instead, he feels manipulated and drained because he's suffered through something he doesn't (totally) think he deserved to and he needs someone to blame. Peter is very handy to blame and it does get vicious. It's that coldness of 'I used to care about you' that tends to drive him to be angrier, be more judgemental and be more unforgiving so he doesn't have to admit a weakness in getting hurt by someone. Again, I think this is something instilled from him upbringing and certainly something that came up with the Bella duel.

This pendulum of emotions is something some people put down to Azkaban. Personally, while I think the ferocity of it here (as it is on the subject of murder) is probably to do with Azkaban but those mood swings are just who he is. There seems to be that slight instability in him (which I usually compare with his mothers) before hand and that Azkaban has just made it worse. He wants both the happiness of forgiveness but also to satisfy his hunger for revenge and to me, that is the real battle he's going through in this scene.

'If you want to kill Harry, you'll have to kill us, too!' [Ron] said fiercely[...]
Something flickered in Black's shadowed eyes.
'Lie down,' he said quietly to Ron. 'You will damage that leg even more.' (249)

I admit, I never thought of it like this but it makes a lot of sense. I always thought of it as he's coming to grips with being around a populace that isn't batshit insane and is having a moment of clarity through dealing with his own confusion. I think he is recognising that this is Harry's version of the Marauders and seeing that willingness to do anything for his best friend, yes, I can absolutely see that being why he suddenly takes a shine to him. Being in a place where there has been an atmosphere of dispair without repreive, suddenly seeing something good and noble, it's bound to remind him that no, not everyone is a total shit and that sometimes good friends, even ones who aren't James, do exist and it makes sense that Harry, being like his father (at least to his mind), would have one.

'Going to kill me, Harry?' he whispered. [...]
'You killed my parents,' said Harry[...]
'I don't deny it,' he said, very quietly. (250)

This is something that I rarely touch upon simply because I've never played him in this timeline. What I believe is that he would have been bloody confusing to the Ministry because I imagine if he was answering questions (which if he he was in shock as I've always believed him to be would not have been every question), you would likely get different answers on different phrasings. "Did you kill them" and "Did you sell them out" are two different things in his mind but not to the Ministry. He believes himself to be responsible but isn't so out of it he'd confess to being Voldemorts. To be honest, I can see this being a mixed bag. He's not making a lot of sense, a lot of muggles saw something (though something being the operative term as they were muggles and I can see Sirius saying that and it being taken the wrong way) and a bit of old fashioned prejudice in that he's a Black and related to half the Death Eaters anyway. Anyone who didn't know him really well would have a hard time understanding his motivations to not be a Death Eater and he's admitting to killing them but not to being a Death Eater and not saying much else? I can see where the mess up happened. I don]'t really blame Crouch for this. What does irk me is the wand - why did no one check the last spell cast? To me, that was the sloppy part.

Crookshanks leapt onto Black's chest, and settled himself there, right over Black's heart. Black blinked and looked down at the cat.
'Get off,' he murmured, trying to push Crookshanks off him. [Crookshanks] turned his ugly, squashed face to Harry, and looked up at him with those great yellow eyes. To his right, Hermione gave a dry sob.
[...]So what if he had to kill the cat, too? It was in league with Black ... if it was prepared to die, trying to protect Black, that wasn't Harry's business ... (251)

After discussing before about blurring the behaviours, I think this is a nice blurring of Harry's behaviour. He could kill here and he's young enough to think he might be able to do it from rage alone, something BL!Sirius would have identified with. It has been raised that this could have been the Voldie left over but personally, I think it's a thirteen year old boy and that's that. Harry is impulsive and it suits his Gryffindor sensibilities perfectly. As for Sirius' thoughts at this point, I think to a degree, he didn't want to be touched. There's something very human about touch, even an animal one and he was trying to kill, a very inhuman act. On a more conscious level, I think he didn't want anything else to die because of him. While he could accept Peters death as damage already done (after all, he'd paid for his murder so he may as well get his moneys worth), he doesn't think someone trying to protect him should get hurt.

This makes me wonder about the Secret Keeper debacle. If Sirius had done it, it would have been an almost sure fire way to get him killed unless he talked which, thanks to an oddly large fuckload of stamina, he would never do. Then James had to know that he was essentially signing his best friends death warrant to have him do this which says a lot about the time and the fear of it. As for Sirius, his own insecurities that are causing problems when he picks Peter. He's saying he's doing it because Peter is weak and pathetic, but a lot of that is anger and hurt talking. In reality, it's his own lack of self esteem undermining his faith in his abilities to stay strong. They could be very realistic expectations but they're still low ones.

We have been discussing the effect of their upbringing on both the Black boys lately and while you can see a lot of this insecuity bleed through into what Regulus does and writes, it's still there in Sirius but he's being so loud about his own ego that it's hard to see when that insecurity comes into play. For instance, if something goes wrong, even if he's not being accused, his automatic reaction is to have a go at the person and ask them why it's his fault, which usually causes the other person to have a "whoa, calm down, didn't say that" moment or it escalates into a worse fight. He's very quick to anger from mood swings and very unwilling to back down from a sense of pride, which in the end speaks of an lack of self worth, despite how big his ego is.

In a really amusing way, I think it's Holden that remarks that Buffy has an inferiority coplex about her superiority complex. This is oddly fitting. He does think he's better than everyone else (to a degree -- James is very much on that pedestal) but at the same time, feels like he's not going to be good enough so prefers to get angry first and stop caring first because by his logic, if he does it to them first, it hurts less. This, to me, tells a lot about his ability to mask things and a lot about two personalities at war with eachother which, if we go by OotP, could have straightened out into a more functional person but is never given the chance to. I think James calms him down a lot because he is more stable and Sirius is trying to cling to that in Harry, when Harry himself is in the confused teenage stage and it creates a dependence and Sirius loathes having to depend on anyone. As much as he tends to whinge and draw attention to himself, if something is truly upsetting, he prefers to be on his own.

The fanon Sirius tends to run around screaming things and generally being the exact opposite of subtle. There is rage and a certain amount of poor impulse control, to be sure, but no one has thought about this situation more than Sirius. Even Remus got a break one night a month.

On the note of subtle things, this is something I can't stand. There is no way that Sirius is just a twat running around and causing pranks with no links to an old heritage. I think what's more likely is that he's developing his own personality on top of his parents beliefs like most children do but these two things are so at war with one another, that he has a tendency to swing from one to the other. I think people do mistake what is a false detours so he doesn't have to show his own weaknesses as pure egotism. There's definitely a lot of ego there and that doesn't mean that what he's saying isn't how he feels, but I don't believe it's the only thing he feels.

In a moment of indulgent self pity, there was a conversation with Snape in BL with him asking if he ever got tired of being the persona he tends to put out there the most; that he's a pretty stupid, a slut and a wastrel with no regard for anyone else. This allows him to say I Told You So when he messes up and puts him in a position for an ambush when he wants it. His response, that not all masks are physical, was particularly telling. I think, certainly at this point in BL, he's tired of splitting himself but feels a sense of loss when he tries to stick to one side of himself, which upsets him and drags him down. This means that he's doing what he's likely done his entire life and just avoided it. He answers questions with jokes or jibes designed to make people forget about their question, changes the subject or gets angry himself. Very rarely does he out and out lie because he values the vulnerability in honesty, but it does happen to help him get around subjects that make him uncomfortable. He doesn't want to risk showing his own vulnerabilities because he's not sure who he can trust at this point.

Poster #1:

Poster #2:

Poster #3:

I wanted to add this in for someone who does write Sirius and go a major "YES" in agreement. This is spot on for how my mind works for him. When he gets upset, there's only two options: he gets mad or gets passive and he's done with in BL with different results. They've put a pinpoint on his major personality flaw: he has no intergration of his thoughts now to those he grew up on. Instead, they constantly war eachother which is causing him problems. I believe if he had the chance to grow up, he may well have integrated and become a more stable person.

Lupin broke off. There had been a loud creak behind him. The bedroom door had opened of its own accord. (258)

This, I am willing to admit, was lost on me. I honestly believed that Severus had just done it out of disbelief or pure spite. I'll admit to Snape not being by favourite character (I still have trouble calling him Severus rather than just Snape) but it's little things like this that help me understand him a little better. I'm well aware that Sirius is a malicious git to him as a teenager but I always thought that never warranted Azkaban; a good kick in the arse, maybe, but not that. This scene sits much better with me now.

'No need to tell us he's no good,' snorted Uncle Vernon, staring over the top of his newspaper at the prisoner. 'Look at the state of him, the filthy layabout! Look at his hair!' (18)

Harry had never seen a vampire, but he had seen pictures of them in his Defence Against the Dark Arts classes, and Black, with his waxy white skin, looked just like one. (34)

This made me agree in spades. First, I think it's nice that they're showing that Harry's upbringing has had an effect on him, his opinions and who he's becoming to the point that he's using that judgement in the wizarding world, even if he doesn't know it. As for Sirius and Snape, this is something I have spoken about with Sabrina, who plays BL!Severus. They have a remarkable lot in common, to the point I can't believe it's never been touched on. Though I suppose Harry isn't fond of Snape (understatement!) and he has a lot riding on the idea of family with his Godfather, so why would he want to compare them? It's just a thought.

'If he weren't [mad] when he went to Azkaban, he will be now,' said Ern in his slow voice. (35)

This gets me and it's something I find interesting and bloody hard to reflect, given my own views. Sirius, at least the way I play him, feels a little skittish about it because having the family he has, he's likely seen the effects of Azkaban on people and knows he doesn't want to end up that way, but still feels as if it's an appropriate punishment for epople. Regulus, to use the purist point of view, is more or less, of the same idea: as long as he and his aren't in there, he's fine with it so this is maybe true of most wizards. You have to wonder then how muggle borns feel about it and on a more Sirius note, probably shows the sense of guilt and/or shock level that he was in after the explosion that he was so complacent with the idea of going there or simply not in a state of mind where he realised what was happening.

[...]Finally, I managed to communicate to [Crookshanks] what I was after, and he's been helping me... [...] Peter got wind of what was going on and ran for it ... [Crookshanks] told me Peter had left blood on the sheets [...]' (267)

I have been thinking about the long term effects of Azkaban and as JKR has said in interviews that it is like being in a permenant state of depression (her summation of 'waking up in the morning and wondering why there was still good in the world' is very telling. Physical signs aside, I think the mental ones would cause confusion in both long and short term memory (Sirius having forgotten about James pushing his hair is both heartbreaking and makes me think of this) meaning he could easily not be remembering, be remembering "twistedly" (he will run instead of he is) or have complete lack of knowledge for the passage of time (which I've written before, in that I've had him startle after essentially sitting in the same position for three hours and not realising it, which is something that happens with depression). I think it shows before he makes things right with Harry, his mind is still a dark place and I have to wonder, if he does kill Peter, is he expecting to go back there because he "deserves" it and that once he does make things right there and has a sense of freedom, he starts functioning much better -- he's still bitter, angry and hotheaded but this is just who Sirius is.

Sirius has wildly contrasting feelings of guilt at making Peter Secret-Keeper, and self-righteous... outrage?... piety?... that he was wrongly imprisoned for Peter's murder.

To me, this is more about Sirius' level of loyalty to his friends. His friends mean the world to him and having one dead and one betray him is about the worst thing you can do. He's wavering between his want to believe in his friend despite his shortcomings (imagined on his part, I think) and then there is the part of him that wants revenge. He is a very vengeful creature and he obviously wants his blood but there is a small part of him, I think, that just wants a friend back that he knows he'll never be able to forgive so he throws up this anger (which is anger he genuinely has but could get some control over) to make sure if someone is getting hurt, it's not going to be him or the people he still cares for. This is something I tend to put in purist interactions in BL. Of course, he has his guilt as well, but it's just another side to it.

'Sirius -- it's me ... it's Peter ... your friend ... you wouldn't ...' (273)

I don't think it's nutty at all. Despite leaving his family, I do believe the one major thing Sirius has going for him is his sense of loyalty. It does blind him from time to time and when that happens, that vengeful and angry side comes into play (which is what I believe happened with Regulus, he felt that he could have tried harder to stay alive and died a coward instead because it was the easy way out and instead of being upset about this, he's angry with him mixed with a sense of pity, which makes sense for his belief that his brother is still a child). Sirius before Azkaban may well have listened to the appeal but this emotional distortion that Azkaban has caused is bringing his already intense emotional state and poor impulse control to its height.

'HOW DARE YOU SPEAK TO HARRY?' roared Black. 'HOW DARE YOU FACE HIM? HOW DARE YOU TALK ABOUT JAMES IN FRONT OF HIM?'

To me, this is both anger and a sense of possession. James was his best friend and Harry is his son and his godson. I do think he has a very overbearing and possessive nature and likely due to a privileged upbringing, reacts badly to sharing things. This is as much that to me as it is outrage that someone has the audicity to talk about James when his own pain is all encompassing to him and he's being blinded to anyone elses.

'He would have killed me, Sirius!'
'THEN YOU SHOULD HAVE DIED!' roared Black. 'DIED RATHER THAN BETRAY YOUR FRIENDS, AS WE WOULD HAVE DONE FOR YOU!' (275)

This is an interesting one because a) I don't think Sirius believes him because he's already betrayed him and lost his trust and b) a lot of people have put question on whether Sirius would have followed through and died for him. Simple answer is yes, at least for my interpretation. His friends are the most important thing to him and he'll do anything for them if it means saving their lives.

'Black had bewitched them, I saw it immediately. A Confundus Charm, to judge by their behaviour. [...] They weren't responsible for their actions. On the other hand, their interference might have permitted Black to escape [...] They've got away with a great deal before now ... I'm afraid it's given them a rather high opinion of themselves [...]' (283)

To be honest, I think he's just rubbing it in here. I don't think he thought they were confunded. He might think Sirius had charmed his way into their good graces as he is want to do and thinks that sounds absurd, but all in all, I think Snape is the confused one here and is struggling for control. In my opinion, control seems key to both Sirius and Severus in what they do - even when Sirius loses control in BL through inebriating substances or though battles, he initiates so he has control from the outset and Snape is a spy; control is key to his survival.

'Sirius told me all about how they became Animagi last night,' said Dumbledore, smiling. 'An extraordinary achievement -- not least, keeping it quiet from me. And then I remembered the most unusual form your Patronus took, when it charged Mr Malfoy down[...]' (312)

I think this is pretty important. Sirius is willing to talk about things now Harry knows everything and now he's gotten himself in a mess. This seems like Sirius key behaviour to me: he only wants to talk about it when he's in a mess and either needs help out of it or wants to brag about getting out of it. If he was bound, surely he could unbind himself by changing into his dog form and I now have the image of him doing it for an amused Dumbledore. I do wonder if this contributes to Dumbledores lack of faith later on - if four students could deceive him and do something so advanced, what else could be going on?

I thought your friend Ron might like to keep this owl, as it's my fault he no longer has a rat. (316)

As for his sense of humour, this is Sirius to me: making a joke out of something completely inappropriate and finds it funny.

At this point, Sirius isn't preparing himself to kill. This is something I've noticed in BL: he feels trepediation at the idea of killing someone so now some important people know the truth, he's happy to be free and has hope that they will recapture Peter and that everything will work out. The remaining Marauder, Remus, is his friend once again (I do think he'd have written but wouldn't have really known what to say) and he's building up that "family" that was oh so important to him before. I think being back at 12GP drains him of a lot of that hope and he falls into old, bitter habits as well as his age reversion I mentioned earlier and probably drove said family (likely Remus, knowing BL canon) up the wall with the mood swings and outbursts .

As a wierd random fact for people: in OotP (UK first edition), Sirius dies on page 711 and in PoA, he reveals this to be his vault number. I found this both amusing and strange.

Also this is freaking hysterical. High lights include Sirius having *sparkles*, being grossed out by Severus/Lily and going OMG WHAT about when DH puts the The Incident. Possibly not to be read at work.

Batman, Robin & Beyond

2009-03-05T21:28:18Z

This, more than anything else, will be me collecting my thoughts on Terry, so there's a chance it won't make the slightest bit of sense to anyone else. There will likely be some DC/DCAU blurring within.

Alright, first and foremost, let's ignore most of Epilogue as I'm working on the end of season three and get down to the beginnings of Terry. He is, more or less, what you'd expect from a Robin: he's bright, he's athletic, quick-witted, he has a troubled past as a delinquent and he makes mistakes. You have to ask yourself, in another time and place, would Terry have been a Robin, rather than the Bat? I honestly don't know. While he has all the makings of a good Robin (including bright eyes and dark hair, I really do think Bruce is trying to start a harem here), he also has never been a Robin and this is part of what makes it interesting to me. His circumstances meant he could have gone either way, but the world needed a Batman so this was the role he filled. He didn't necessarily fill it by thinking 'the world needs a Batman'. His background in that is much more personal and much more like Dick's. I have to wonder if that's part of the reason he was taken on.

Bringing it back to basics, Terry has a distinct lack of control. That could well be a side effect of living in a Gotham without Batman. He's grown up in a world where screams are normal and people ignore them. He doesn't see eye to eye with his father, he doesn't see his mother and younger brother all that much, high school is high school with all the troubles that come with that and like most of us at that age. Now, considering, Terry must have only been sixteen when the seiries starts and he was fourteen when he was getting himself into a lot of trouble, that's not a huge difference. This may be where the theory that Batman is shaping him as much as anything because of his age. He's learning what works and what doesn't. As he tells Barbara, he makes mistakes, but he also doesn't make those mistakes twice. He learns quickly and pushes with a hard determination, that I think he knows could turn into an obsession, much as it had done to his predecessor.

Batman, as a role, has always been about choices and Terry has made this choice about three times. First, when he steals the suit because he needs to bring a sense of closure to his fathers death. Again, when Bruce offers him the role in a more permenant way and lastly, after Return of the Joker, when he finally understands why the previous family fell apart. They had never been active in his lifetime, so it was a different world back then and until that point, at least in my opinion, Terry appears to have been wearing the training wheels. Taking on someone like the Joker, you can't have them and he makes that choice by doing his own thing rather than Bruce's because he's his own kind of Batman, no matter how much respect he has for Bruces.

There's a chilling echo in the DCAU for the old batfamily with those old cases. The case in regular DC implies death, so the death of an era and a family is symbolised in those. Terry is disconnected from all of this and while he bares the weight of being Bruce's successor, he doesn't have all of that emotional baggage that Dick or Tim would have brought to the role. It's one of the ways he differs from what's expected; Terry has all the hope and optimism of a Robin but is growing into the grit that makes him Batman. He redefines the role for a new era: his era, where things are different. Criminals aren't static and neither can Gotham's protector be.

There's also another layer to this; Terry can fuck up and run to Bruce, but he also takes responsibility for his own mistakes and does try to sort things on his own. Bruce tries to protect him and even Barbara ends up with a grudging respect for the fact a Batman may still be needed in Gotham. But can he stand on his own? I think Epilogue shows he can, but he has also learned an important lesson: everyone needs help sometimes.

To that end, what function does a Robin have? Here's where I'm going to blur, because the people I'm describing with be DC (mostly because Toon!Tim amounts to Tim and Jasons unholy lovechild so it'll get covered). What does a Robin bring to a world, in comparison to a Batman?

The way I see it, Robin is the soul to the body. It's two sides of the same coin, the side with hope, the side that can deal with the victims with a brilliant smile and a gentle touch, a beacon of hope in the skies because you never see Batman, but you can see that red and gold (and green, sometimes) and feel a little bit safer. A Batman without Robin is a Batman in darkness...except when the Batman is young, inexperienced and then he's Terry, who is a strange crossbreed.

That's all well and good as it is, but there are more personal things Robin's bring to their role. For Dick, it's his acrobatic skills, his ability to deal with people on a very friendly level, his enthusiasm for everything and his heart which keeps him (and Bruce, to a degree, sane). For Jason, it's his ability to deal with the streets, to not over-think things and again, he has that enthusiasm. For Tim, it was his mind; he is a good detective, he's manipulative and oh yes, enthusiasm again. Now here's where we crash and burn: Tim has lost his enthusiasm, where Dick never did (this is why Nightwing is a whole different creature from the Bat) and lo and behold, as the series progresses, DCAU!Dick loses his enthusiasm because there's a lot of darkness out there.

The point being, Terry is slowly losing that enthusiasm. He needs to be reminded to smile and not let it all get him down. He brought hope to Bruce back in the early seasons of Batman Beyond, but by the end, he could use a little hope himself. So is that the effect of Gotham? Or is it the effect of going without a 'family' to help him? This is where I think it gets important: there will need to be a Batfamily in the DCAU for Terry's time. As we've seen, there has to be a family there. There has to be a support system, in DC or DCAU. DCAU is showing what will happen if that support system falls apart and if Terry's father hadn't been killed in a fluke, the legend that was Batman may have died. Why? Because they didn't pull together as a family.

Are you paying attention to this, Battle for the Cowl? This is how they were destroyed. A Batman needs a Robin. Screw that, Gotham needs a Batfamily, not just a Batman, or they will end up bitter, angry and feeling alone, as Terry appears to be in Epilogue. There has to be hope, knowledge, experience and bonds of family to get them through. Gotham has the Bats. The Bats need eachother.

lipsofpoison @ 2008-02-26T00:55:00

2008-02-26T00:56:59Z

Guys. Guys.

If you haven't watched Being Human, please do for the following reasons alone.

THIS is how werewolf transformations should look. Harry Potter films, take note! It's a vampire and a werewolf who buy a house that's haunted so it's a Vampire, Ghost and Werewolf sharing a flat.

Realtor: "We cater for lots of people like you."
Mitchell: "I really doubt that."
Realtor: "No, really. I found these two women a house. I mean, it's very nice and all, but I'm like you, I like dick."
George: "Oh! We-"
Mitchell: "He just can't get enough of it."
George: "I'm not gay!"
Mitchell: "He hasn't told his parents."
George: "I had a girlfriend!"
Mitchell: "Then he realised he couldn't live a lie!"

Mitchell: "Let me carry you over the threashold. Come on, it's a big day."
George: "Don't be ridiculous."
Mitchell: "It would mean a lot to me George."
George: *drops his bags and puts his arms out*
Mitchell: *cracks up*

VAMPIRE DETECTIVES. WEREWOLF ORDERLIES. A GHOST WITH A TEA OBSESSION.

Re: being a werewolf
"I thought you were gay!"
"That would have been easier to explain."

Mitchell: "So if you could be in Harry Potter, what house would you be in?"
George: "I want to say Gryffindor but don't you have to be brave? What about Ravenclaw?"
Mitchell: "You'd have to be smart!"
George: "There! I'm a Ravenclaw!"
Mitchell: "I can see you as a Ravenclaw."
Annie: "I'd kind of like Hufflepuff. I always get the idea they spend all day playing with safety scissors and glitter."
George:"What about you?"
Mitchell: "I'd stay in the canteen."
Annie: "Does no one ever say Slytherin?"
George: "No, because that's like admitting you're a sociopath!"

Mitchell: "Just so you know, people say it's creepy here."
George: "It will be now! RAWR! HAHAHA!"

SUPER HEARING. SUPER STRENGTH. WEREWOLF LOVE <333 SUPER CREEPY EVIL VAMPIRES BENT ON TAKING OVER THE WORLD. Yeah, baby. This just backs up that England is perfect vampire weather. We never get the sun. It's filmed in Bristol. This amuses me.

lipsofpoison @ 2008-01-13T11:31:00

2008-01-13T11:31:56Z

Someone in the street just let their kid scream "Mummy! Please let me in!" while sobbing 25 minutes in the ice cold.

I despise some people. You don't do that to what sounded like an eight year old who after about 15, started to sob about the freezing cold.

lipsofpoison @ 2007-12-19T14:55:00

2007-12-19T14:58:14Z

So I watched Enchanted today and I actually enjoyed it, corny though it was.

Amy Adams was stunning as usual and Marsden had me in stitches. The ending was perfect and I'm actually still smiling, it's very feel good.

Pimping out.

2007-12-14T00:58:36Z

Let's face it, the man is gorgeous.

What happens when there is a spider that spans the size of a DVD...

2007-09-28T18:31:37Z

lipsofpoison You know what, that freaking spider is back and I have rubbish aim and I managed to hit it and heard a crunch yet it's still right there. I'm officially creeped out.
justitia LOL!
lipsofpoison What's worse it it's right at my door way. And I'm just UGH ing.
justitia Awww
lipsofpoison I'm like "keep walking dude"
lipsofpoison "opposite direction please"
justitia Lol!
lipsofpoison srsly, crunch = gross
justitia LOL!!!
justitia It's funny, for me
lipsofpoison I'm like "I crunched you! How are you not DEAD?!!"
justitia go drop a book on it
lipsofpoison It was a shoe!
lipsofpoison A high heel!
lipsofpoison A wide one!
justitia Drop a book on it.
lipsofpoison It's above my doorway. I can't drop anything on it.
justitia So just squash it!
lipsofpoison I tried! I got ze crunch of DOOOM.
justitia .... you realise that I'm just sitting here giggling, right

I want it to fuck off and die, seriously. I hate huge spiders with huge bodies and eee!!! It attacked me last night and now it's back for vengeance.

.........I'm such a girl.

Why be one house when you can be two?

2007-08-12T14:57:51Z

colligo_sorting colligo_sorting colligo_sorting colligo_sorting colligo_sorting colligo_sorting colligo_sorting colligo_sorting colligo_sorting colligo_sorting colligo_sorting colligo_sorting colligo_sorting colligo_sorting colligo_sorting colligo_sorting

Come and join the insanity.

video of Tootsie with Ani, Obi & Ethie

2007-02-12T19:46:20Z

This was done by my dad, on the kittens. I would advise watching it with sound on, at least from 00:36, as you can then hear the kittens yelling and also, my dulcet tones.

Pretty Boys Picspam

2007-01-26T01:13:59Z

Picspam of the prettiest guys for now. (I may have a thing for blue eyes)

From the bottom up:
Adam Pascal, Alan Tudyk, Alexis Vinas, Ashton Kutcher, John Barrowman (with partner Scott), Boyd Holbrook, Bradley Cooper, Charlie Hunnam, David Anders, somone that looks like Dominic Monaghan, Eion Bailey, Elijah Wood, Eric Bana, Eric Close, Gael Garcia Bernal & Diego Luna, Goran Visnjic, Hugh Dancy, Ian Somerhalder,Jake Gyllenhaal, James Marsden, Jamie Bamber, Jared Padalecki, Jared Leto, Jason Behr, Jensen Ackles, Joshua Bell, Jonathan Rhys Meyers, Jude Law, Kian Mitchum, Kevin Zegers, Lee Williams & Mark Warren, Matt Barr, Matthew Gray Gubler, Rufus Wainwright, Steve Sandvoss, Tobey Maguire, Veronica Mars Boys, William Mosely, Will Kemp.

lipsofpoison @ 2006-10-18T19:50:00

2006-10-18T19:25:49Z

As some of you may know, one of my characters in badbadworld is a singer and we often talk about his album. Well, having inspiration, i did this.

Click to enlarge.

01. I Need You

Just look at me now
I'm broke and alone again
You know it's true
I'm nothing without you
And I miss you much

Sitting here now
I still remember you
Just the taste of your lips
Feel of your finger tips
And the smell of your hair

And I'm lost without you once again and now I don't know how
Can I face another without you by my side
Wish I could only turn back the hands of time
Cause baby
I need you

I'm late once again
Can't bring myself to care
Not meeting you
Cause I'm still all alone
Without you here

Free to be me
But no one to see me through
You know I've crying sore
Never so broken before
Baby, come home

Now that I was wrong and you were right
Since you left I've throught about it every night
Please tell me you love me
And make me whole again
Cause baby
I need you

02. Wash It All Away

When the tear drops get you down
And the roses aren't delivered your door
Anymore
When there's no silver lining
To your cloud
I'll be here to wipe the pain away

Glass tears and frozen eyes
Melted under Shakespeare's sky
Smiles breaking through the darkest clouds
Afraid that I didn't make you proud

You wash it all away
Every tear, every pain and every bad day
That I ever had.
You wash it all away
With every word I hear you say
I see my silver lining.

Afraid I burned all roads in life
Bodies littered in agony and strife
You were my silver lining,
Shining
More than star I've ever seen.

You wash it all away
Every tear, every pain and every bad day
That I ever had.
You wash it all away
With every word I hear you say
I see my silver lining.

You wash it all away
Just the fact that you stay
Alone with me tonight.
You wash it all away.

03 Star

Reds across a sunset sky,
Blooming,
Glowing,
Releasing the trapped stars,
Escaping to their homes,
In the sky.

Never alone,
An angel in the stars
A guardian to the sky.

You are the star,
That fell through tonight.
You are the rainbow,
that collapsed under moon light.
You are my angel
Without a cloud in sight.
My escaping star,
You have a sky to light.

The star that falls
In my arms tonight
My little light
Fulfilling your dreams,
Of all the stars,
You know, you are the strong,
The bright.

You are the star,
That fell through tonight.
You are the rainbow,
that collapsed under moon light.
You are my angel
Without a cloud in sight.
My escaping star,
You have a sky to light.

My escaping star,
You have a sky to light.

04. Broadways Baby

Bright lights,
You're the lead, you know
The star of the show
Smiling on opening night.

Glittered eyes,
Make up boys and girls rushing around you,
Although you need none,
It's no surprise
They have basically nothing to do

Broadways Baby
Perfect tonight
Enchanting really,
The way you look
Tonight

Playing a role,
The clothes they've dressed you in
Out there bearing your soul
Although uncomfortable in your own skin

Reading your prose,
A script that seems made for you,
For your voice carrying
And just suppose
This could be the big night
For you.

Broadways Baby
Perfect tonight
Enchanting really,
The way you look
Tonight

05. Strength Inside

Like a warrior
You never take a break
Like a pro
You never stop to think

It's that strength inside,
That makes you who you are
It's that playful smile,
That has brought you so far
It's the way you care without showing you do
It's that strength inside that makes you.

Stronger than I'll ever know
This soldier
A soldier inside
On the front lines in your mind.

It's that strength inside,
That makes you who you are
It's that playful smile,
That has brought you so far
It's the way you care without showing you do
It's that strength inside that makes you.

06. Gone

Lookin' out to the street
Where the people are passin' me two by two
Every lovers smile reminds me of you
And I wonder where you are tonight.

The washed sheets still feel like you
And now I'm wondering
I'm wondering what could have gone so wrong

I'm still waiting,
Wondering when you'll come home
And if you still call it home
Anymore

Every night, over and over, you're in my dreams
Every day, everything has your mark
Or so it seems.
Since you've been gone
Every other thought is of you and where you are now
Do you still miss me?
Do you feel this down?
Since I've been gone.

People together are so in love
And now that I'm without you
I'm wondering
Was it real?

Would you come home if you knew
Knew the tears I've shed
Could flood a desert
Or two
All over you.

Every night, over and over, you're in my dreams
Every day, everything has your mark
Or so it seems.
Since you've been gone
Every other thought is of you and where you are now
Do you still miss me?
Do you feel this down?
Since I've been gone.

Did you love me at all?
Or was that just a rehearsal,
For when the real thing hits?
These things I've been wondering,
Since you've been gone.

07. Here We Go

I don't know and I don't care
Well, here we go and go and go
Your addiction to my fiction
Standing there with that convicition
Your eyes sayin' here we go again

My lonely mind is faded again
You're out of line and jaded
I don't care
I'm not perfect either

I'm not a fighter, I'm a musician
I only wanted it to be fun
Not this broken shell I've become
Why didn't we just have fun?

Is it over, is it done, am I over too?
Can I run, can I leave, could I mend without you?
Am I broken with or without you
With or without you?

Well, here we go and here we go again
Don't know, don't care
Your lies dry broken tears
And now we're just perfect

08. You're Only Human

Beautiful smiles stay for a while
Sand in your hair and sky in your eyes
Smiles while away the doubts that you're wrong
Different and wrong in the way they suspect
Smiles can help you run

High heels and gloss won't hide the fuss
Can fool people into loving you though
Just acting like you'd never say no
To another cosmopolitan

Never let them suspect
Never let anyone in
Never let them know
You're only human
Never pout or frown
Just turn it upside down
Appearances are all they know
You're only human

No depth, sugar deep
No feelings
You're only a concept and a body
Can't break it out

Can't let them suspect
Can't ever tell anyone
Can't ever let someone find out
That you're only human
Flaws run deep
Blood still flows

09. Stephanie

She aint got heirs and graces
Brings charm to any places
That she walks into, yeah
Now

I know that she's Stephanie now
She's all grown up now
No, she don't need me now
Not now.

Sometimes she's kind of crazy
But she's one special lady
And I want to tell her please

That I know that she's Stephanie now
She's a young adult now
She's fabulous now
Who knew?

So mysterious, her life is
So beautiful, her smile is
And I love her endlessly

But she's Stephanie now
She's no baby now
She's a really big star
To me

There's something about the way that she walks
About the things that she talks
And I just gotta say

She's really flyin' above the sky
And you can hear angels cry
When she's flyin' by

Because she's Stephanie now
Can't hold no candle to my Stephanie now
My big girl Stephanie now
That's her

She knows how to be funny,
Though her life aint always sunny,
She's still the world to me

Because she's Stephanie now
Yeah, she's Stephanie now
Just Stephanie
Just her.

10. One of the Bad Guys

Well, it's just so dark in here
I can't see
I guess I'm stuck seeing life a little like you do

Don't know what to do now
Cause I'm just trying to make you happy
But let's forget about you

Just for a sec

Trust me and pay
Come along and play
Cause I'm one of the bad guys now
Yeah, like you didn't see it coming

I won't break
No, I can't
Not held to you
Not broken in two

Guess you didn't know
Guess I don't care
Not, not anymore

Too far gone, I guess

So trust me and pay
Come along and play
Cause I'm one of the bad guys now
Yeah, like you didn't see it coming

Didn't see it coming, did you?

11. Cause It's Love

Like the rising of the sun
Like the day has just begun
Like I can't believe I've loved you all this time
Like a rarely spoken truth
Hiding underneath the jaws of the fear
But hold on, dear

Cause it's love

There are those who cannot breathe
Got no more stregnth there in thier hearts
So now here go and now it starts
In the dark, we lost our way
Like the children, who were led astray
But now I pray

Cause it's love
When you think that all hope is gone
it's love
Hold on to me and I will keep you strong
Cause it's love
When the darkness overtakes you
it's love
And it will set you free

When you feel like you can't face the day
When you're all alone and there's nothing more to say
When you break away
And nothing feels the same

This love
When you feel so wrong
Like innocence
that jaded us all

When you don't see what I see
I'll set you straight,
it's just you and me
You'll find me

You fear the coming storm
And you're longing to be free
Just think of me
Think of me
Think of me
Think of me
And I will bring you home
If you think of me
I will keep you safe and warm

That's where love will be

12. Requiem for a Broken Heart
I'm alright,
Yeah, everything is fine
Live until you die
Never thought I'd know about it now

What would you say
If you knew I felt the same
Neither ones to blame
For who we are
I know we'll be okay

It aint easy now
We know the end
We know that everything we had was more we deserved
Try to be strong
Convinced you don't belong
Baby you don't know how wrong we were

And now I
I know just who we are
A man and his guitar
A woman and her bleeding heart
We scar

What'd you say
If I told you I was framed
Let you go
Okay
But now I know
It was never the right idea

It aint easy now
We know the end
We know that everything we had was more we deserved
Try to be strong
Convinced you don't belong
Baby you don't know how wrong we were

lipsofpoison @ 2006-10-18T17:35:00

2006-10-18T17:36:33Z

Jeepers, I'm tired. And I have no inspiration for my challenge fic.

However, we still have time to get in icons for alias_lims, which rocks because Lauren = love. Yu should all sign up while you can!

Quotes

2006-08-23T15:37:19Z

"It's a shame. We'd make a lovely couple. We're both... tall."

"That looks like Dominic Monaghan!"

"Some asshole told me that if you believe in something you have to be willing to sacrifice everything."

"Sometimes it all still feels like a mass of dots. But more and more these days, I feel like we're all connected. And it's beautiful... and funny... and good."

"You want revelations engraved in gold and angels trumpeting down from heaven. What if this is it instead? Me telling you I love you, right here in the snow? I think that is pretty miraculous."

"I'm a New Yorker. Fear's my life."

"Look, I don't believe in love. I believe in fucking. It's honest, it's efficient. You get in and out with a maximum of pleasure and a minimum of bullshit. Love is something that straight people tell themselves they're in so they can get laid. And then they end up hurting each other because it was all based on lies to begin with. If that's what you want, then go and find yourself a pretty little girl and get married."

"Do anything, say anything, fuck anything. No excuses, no apologies, no regrets."

"Oh, we can meditate! That sounds like fun."

"It's not lying if they make you lie... if the only truth they can accept is their own."

"I'm half Italian and half drag queen. I'm allowed to get worked up!"

"I think you're a selfish, heartless asshole... keep up the good work!"

"It's a difficult question to answer given the limitations of the language, the conventionality of most people's thinking. Let's just say he's the guy I fuck more then once."

"Once you sell your soul to the devil, he holds the copyright."

"You gonna sit with me or just whistle?"

"Would it have helped if I'd said a 'Pyro'?"
"Yeah, actually, it would. Or if you called him 'that cute one that fancied Bobby.'"
"Subtext, much?"
"Oh, please. So. Doing. It."

"Well, I'd like to order one boyfriend pie then, please."

"What can I do?"
"Set the midget free?"

"My life happens to, on occasion, suck beyond the telling of it. Sometimes more than I can handle. And it's not just mine. Every single person down there is ignoring your pain because they're too busy with their own. The beautiful ones. The popular ones. The guys that pick on you. Everyone. If you could hear what they were feeling. The loneliness. The confusion. It looks quiet down there. It's not. It's deafening."

"Let's look at this objectively. Figure it out in a cold, impersonal, CSI-like manner. 'Cause we're a couple of carpet fibers away from a case."

"You would wait that long for sex? You don't even wait that long for coffee."
"That's because I've never been challenged to wait that long for coffee."

"Because I happen to love you, you stupid, stupid little man and I am not letting you ditch me like some heartsick teen."

"What, I'm not supposed to have feelings?"
"Oh, you are. I just don't see how anyone could get over me."

"So how's your first major trauma going?"
"Pretty cool, actually. I've never almost died before."

"Enjoy your grieving period!"

"Hi, name?"
"Name? I-I have a name."
"Yeah, most people do."

"If you marry a psychotic lowli- What am I saying? It would be lost on you."
"And why would I marry a psychotic lowlife when I have you? A psychotic highlife?"

"Only because you can't have sex with a guitar."
"True."
"Although you've probably tried."
"Well..."

"Because it's what's right! Because that way even when- if- I lose, I'll know that I tried to prevent it. That's better than nothing!"

"One word frees us of all the weight and pain of life: that word is love."

"I reject your reality, and substitute my own!"

"Friends are angels who lift us to our feet when our wings have trouble remembering how to fly."

"Remind me to buy him a fruit basket or something if we get out alive."

"Want me to hit you?"
"That's not on the list,"
"It's a free gift."
"If it's a gift, then I'll return it,"

"They'll think it was burglars,"
"Burglars who broke in and redecorated?"
"Gay burglars,"

"All the Dark Lord would have to do is poke you with a toothpick and you'd go absolutely barking."

"It is not yet time for your daily spanking."

"Nice summer place, Malfoy. Where'd you spend Christmas? Mordor?"
"Disney World, actually, but the resemblance is stronger than you might think."

"Voldemort's trousers would never fit us."

"Why not a Malfoy? We're extremely personable, you know. And then there's the sex-appeal..."
"Oddly, her biography here doesn't say anything about sex-appeal."
"They probably called it something different back then."
"Like what? Ye Olde Sex Appeal?"

"Some women get excited about earrings, others get excited about grand-scale larceny."

"Never never never?' That's right, Finnigan. Because if you say it three times, that'll make it true."

"I'm not sleeping with Hermione either. Is that newsworthy?"

"Love. It's not some holy, exalted thing, you know. It's about appetite and wanting and need and all those other things that make people do ugly things to each other. There's no betrayal without love, no loss without it, no jealousy. Half the ugliness in this world comes from it. It cuts and burns and makes wounds that don't ever heal. Give me hatred any day. Now there's an emotion I can get behind. You always know where you stand with it."

"You call that a bit mopey? I suppose you'd say that the inhabitants of Pompeii were a bit surprised when the top blew off their local hill and buried them all in ash? Or that the crew of the Titanic was a bit annoyed about hitting that iceberg? Or that -"

"When your mother was your age, she was ruling her planet."
"Well, I bet her voice wasn't breaking at the time."

"Son, what does that shirt say?"
"It says 'You think you've got problems? My father is a Sith Lord!'"

"You know what it said? After he held me up with all his lecturing, he had the nerve to write on the note 'Luke is late this morning because he forgot how to dress himself'."

"Now, let's revise. What would you say when introducing yourself to an important adult at a social gathering?"
"I'd say … 'Hello, I'm Luke Skywalker' … and then I'd point you out, and say 'that's my Dad'."

"If this were prison, you'd be like, my bitch."
"I am not your bitch, it's not like I have 'Bianca's Bitch' tattooed on my ass."

"C'mon, Wyatt, Apparently I'm a bad boy and need to be punished."

"What does that make Wyatt?"
"Darth Vadar."
"Oh god."
"Although I'm not sure who that makes me,"
"Luke, obviously."

"Are we *cuddling?*"
"You're warm, it's exchanging body heat, not cuddling."

"You have got to be kidding me, I scry for evil and end up fighting a
girl with a bad boob job."
"Yeah? Well, run along and play with you're toys, kid, I'm busy."

"Get over yourself, junior."
"What can I say, the ego's hereditary."

"Dude. You fugly."

"God save us from half the people who think they're doing God's work."

"Just try to relax."
"Just try to shut up."

"Let me know if you start seeing dead people, Haley Joel."

"Who's the hottest psychic, Patricia Arquette, Jennifer Love Hewett or You?"

"Boy you put your foot on my coffee table and I'm gonna wack you with a spoon."

"Your alarms are about as useful as boobs on a man."

"Why don't you give her one of those strip-o-grams that you do."
"Bite me."
"Oh no, bite her. But don't leave any teeth marks or nothing."

"When I told dad that I was afraid of the thing in the closet, he gave me a 45!"

"Remember, WWBD? What Would Buffy Do?"

"Fake marshal. Fake credit cards. Is there anything about you that's real?"
"My boobs."

"Driver picks the music, shotgun shuts his cakehole."

"Where's our father Meg?"
"You didn't ask very nicely."
"Where's our father Bitch!"

"You see that? That attitude there? That's why I always got the extra cookie."

"I was gonna take you to so many places. Barcelona. Not the city Barcelona, the planet Barcelona. You'll love it, fantastic place, they've got dogs with no noses!"

"You are a vampire who never knew what life was until it ran out in a big gush over your lips. "

"The world changes, we do not, there lies the irony that finally kills us. "

"Evil is a point of view. God kills indiscriminately and so shall we. For no creatures under God are as we are, none so like him as ourselves. "

"Goodnight sweet prince, may flights of devils wing you to your rest."

"There's still life in the old lady yet!"

"Perfect! Just perfect! Just burn the place! Burn everything we own! Have us sleeping in the field like cattle!"
"You thought you could have it all..."
"Oh, shut up, Louis!"

"Merciful death. How you love your precious guilt."

"Oh Louis, Louis. Still whining Louis. Have you heard enough? I've had to listen to that for centuries."

"I assume I need no introduction. "

"Evil is always possible. Goodness is a difficulty."

"Hell is hatred, people living together in eternal hatred. We are not in Hell."

"A singer can shatter a glass with the proper high note...But the simplest way for anyone to break it is simply to drop it on the floor."

"Come on, say it again. I'm a perfect devil. Tell me how bad I am. It makes me feel so good!"

"I can't help being a gorgeous fiend, it's just the card I drew!"

"I'm glad that worked. Those would have been terrible last words."

"What about me? I saw the Fall of Troy. World War V, and now I'm gonna die in a dungeon. In Cardiff!"

"hhoho, brilliant! It's you! You're my favourite, you are, you're the best! You know why? Coz you're so thick! You're Mr Thick Thick Thickity Thick Face from Thicktown, Thickania. And so's your dad!"

"Arthur?"
"Good name for a horse."
"No, your not keepin' the horse."
"I let you keep Mickey."

"So she got plans for being the queen then."
"No, they already got a queen. She got plans for being his mistress."
"Oooh. I get it. Camilla."

"That there comes a time, Time Lord, when every lonely little boy must learn how to dance."

"What do monsters have nightmares about?"
"Me!"

"Oh my God they're rats, dozens of rats, vacuum packed rats."
"And you decided to scream."
"It took me by surprise."
"Like a little girl."
"It was dark, I was covered in rats."
"Nine, maybe ten years old, I'm seeing pigtails, frilly skirt..."

"We're not gonna die. We can't die, Bendis. You know why? Because we are so...very...pretty. We are just too pretty for God to let us die."

"Everything looks good from here... (beat...playing with plastic dinosaurs over his console) Yes. Yes, this is a fertile land, and we will thrive."
We will rule over all this land, and we will call it... 'This Land'."
I think we should call it...your grave!"
Ah, curse your sudden but inevitable betrayal!"
Ha ha HA! Mine is an evil laugh...now die!"

I don't believe there's a power in the 'verse that can stop Kaylee from being cheerful. Sometimes you just wanna duct tape her mouth and dump her in the hold for a month."

"If anyone gets nosy, just...you know... shoot 'em. "
"Shoot 'em?"
"Politely."

"I brought you some supper but if you'd prefer a lecture, I've a few very catchy ones prepped...sin and hellfire... one has lepers."

"Testing, testing. Captain, can you hear me?"
"I'm standing right here."
"You're coming through good and loud."
" 'Cause I'm standing right here."

"I just wanted you to face me so she could get behind you. Drunks are so cute."

"Well they tell you: never hit a man with a closed fist. But it is, on occasion, hilarious."

"What did I say to you about barging into my shuttle?"
"That it was manly and impulsive?"
"Yes, precisely. Only the exact phrase I used was 'don't'."

"And Kaylee, what the hell's goin' on in the engine room? Were there monkeys? Some terrifying space monkeys maybe got loose?"

"Time for some thrilling heroics."

"Do you know what the chain of command is here? It's the chain I go get and beat you with to show you who's in command."

"Oh my god. What can it be? We're all doomed! Who's flying this thing!? Oh right, that would be me."

"It's a real burn, being right so often."

"You fought with Captain Reynolds in the war?"
"Fought with a lot of people in the war."
"And your husband?"
"Fight with him sometimes, too."

"Seems odd you'd name your ship after a battle you were on the wrong side of."
"May have been the losing side. Still not convinced it was the wrong one."

"Planet's coming up a mite fast."
"That's just cause I'm going down too quick. Likely crash and kill us all."
"Well, that happens, let me know."

"You want a slinky dress? I can buy you a slinky dress. Captain, can I have money for a slinky dress?"
"I'll chip in."
"I can hurt you."

"Yessir, Captain Tight Pants."

"Okay, help me find our man; he's supposed to be older. Kind of stocky, wears a red sash crossways."
"Why does he do that?"
"Maybe he won the Miss Persephone pageant. Just help me look."

"I know him. And I think he's a psychotic lowlife."
"And I think calling him that is an insult to the psychotic lowlife community."

"We're two miles above ground and they can probably hear her down there. Soon as we unload, she can holler until our ears bleed. Although I would take it as a kindness if she didn't."
"The human body can be drained of blood in 8.6 seconds given adequate vacuuming systems."
"See, morbid and creepifying, I got no problem with, long as she does it quiet-like."

"Surely is. Knew a man once who had a hole clean through his whole shoulder. Used to keep a spare hankie in there."

"Dear Diary...today I was pompous and my sister was crazy. Today, we were kidnapped by hill folk never to be seen again. It was the best day ever."

"Well, look at this! Appears we got here just in the nick of time. Whaddya suppose that makes us?"
"Big damn heroes, sir."
"Ain't we just!"

"Now think real hard. You been bird-dogging this township a while now. They wouldn't mind a corpse of you. Now you can luxuriate in a nice jail cell, but if your hand touches metal, I swear by my pretty floral bonnet: I will end you."

"If you take sexual advantage of her, you're going to burn in a very special level of hell. A level they reserve for child molesters and people who talk at the theater."

"I would appreciate it if one person on this boat would not assume I'm an evil, lecherous hump."
"No one's saying that, sir."
"Yeah, we're pretty much just giving each other significant glances and laughing incessantly."

"Are you offering me a trade?"
"A trade!? Hell, it's theft! This is the best damn gun made by man. It has extreme sentimental value. It's miles more worthy than what you got."
"What I got? She has a name."
"So does this! I call it Vera."
"Well, my days of taking you seriously are certainly coming to a middle."

"See, Vera? Dress yourself up you get taken out somewhere fun."

"You paid money for this, sir? On purpose?"

"Which one do you figured tracked us?"
"The ugly one, sir."
"Could you be more specific?"

"Looks can be deceiving."
"Not as deceiving as a lowdown, dirty... deceiver."

"Patients were cynical and not responding and we couldn't bring 'em back-"
"They were cyanotic and not responsive."

"What about cortical electrodes?"
"Oh...We forgot 'em."

"Now all we need is a coupla patients."
"Corpses, actually. For this plan to work, River and I will have to be dead."
"I'm starting to like this plan."

"Can we find someplace with a beach?"
"Maybe a naked beach?"

"Oh well let's see...we killed Simon and River, stole a bunch of medicine, and the Cap'n and Zoe are springin' the others got snatched by the feds."

"Yes, I'd forgotten you're moonlighting as a criminal mastermind now. Got your next heist planned?"
"No. But I'm thinking about growing a big black mustache. I'm a traditionalist."

"Ah, the pitter patter of tiny feet in huge combat boots. Shut up!"

"Is there any way I'm gonna get out of this with honor and dignity?"
"You're pretty much down to ritual suicide, lambie-toes."

"Okay, um, I'm lost. Uh, I'm angry, and I'm armed, so if you two have something that you need to work out --"

"Hey, I've been in a firefight before! Well, I was in a fire. Actually, I was fired from a fry-cook opportunity."

"Right. Less talking. She's terse. I can be terse. Once in flight school, I was laconic."

"Preacher, don't the Bible have some pretty specific things to say about killing?
"Quite specific. It is, however, somewhat fuzzier on the subject of kneecaps."

"Oh my god, it's grotesque! Oh, and there's something in a jar."

"Do not fear me. Ours is a peaceful race, and we must live in harmony..."

"Thanks. Didn't know you were there."
"That's sort of the point. Stealth, you may have heard of it."

"You know, it ain't altogether wise, sneaking up on a man when he's handling his weapon."

"This distress call wouldn't be taking place in someone's pants, would it?"

"It sounds like the sort of thing this crew can handle. I can't guarantee they'll handle it particularly well, but-"
"If they got guns, and brains at all..."
"They have guns."

"Everybody's got somebody...Wash, tell me I'm pretty..."
"Were I unwed, I would take you in a manly fashion."
" 'Cause I'm pretty?"
" 'Cause you're pretty."

"Inara, think you could stoop to being on my arm?"
"Will you wash it first?"

"Little River just gets more colorful by the moment. What'll she do next?"
"Either blow us all up or rub soup in our hair. It's a toss-up."
"I hope she does the soup thing. It's always a hoot, and we don't all die from it."

"How did your brain even learn human speech? I'm just so curious."

"Psychic, though? That sounds like something out of science fiction."
"We live in a space ship, dear."

"Yeah well, if she doesn't give us some extra flow from the engine room to offset the burn through, this landing is gonna get pretty interesting."
"Define interesting."
"Oh god oh god we're all gonna die?"
"This is the captain. We have a...little problem with our engine sequence, so we may experience some slight turbulence and then...explode."

"We're gonna explode? I don't wanna explode."
"Fear's nothin' to be ashamed of, doctor."
"This isn't fear. This is anger."
"Well. Kinda hard to tell one from t'other, face like yours."
"Well I imagine if it were fear, my eyes would be wider."
"Hmm. I'll keep a look out for that next time."

"Doctor, I'm taking your sister under my protection here. If anything happens to her, anything at all, I swear to you, I will get very choked up. Honestly, there could be tears."

"Shiny. Let's be bad guys."

"You know what the definition of a hero is? Someone who gets other people killed. "

"You shoot me if they take me!" (sees Mal's gun pointed at his leg) "Well don't shoot me first!"

"I'll kill a man in a fair fight. Or if I think he's gonna start a fair fight. Or if he bothers me. Or if there's a woman. Or if I'm gettin' paid. Mostly when I'm gettin' paid."

"Don't talk to the barkers, talk to the captains. Look the captain in the eye, know who you're dealin' with."

"Shouldna be so clean. It's a dead giveaway you don't belong, you always gotta be tidy. Don't pay anybody in advance. And don't ride in anything with a Capasan-38 engine, they fall right outta the sky."

"Cap'n didn't make them fugitives."
"But he coulda made 'em family. 'stead of keepin' Simon from seein' I was there. And I carried such a torch! And we coulda...goin' on a year now and I ain't had nothin' twixt my nethers weren't run on batteries!"
"Oh God! I can't know that!"
"I could stand to hear more."

"Start with the part where Jayne gets knocked out by a ninety-pound girl, 'cause I don't think that's ever gettin' old."

"No, not now that she's a...a killer woman, we oughtta be bringin' her tea and dumplings!"

"Dear Buddha: please bring me a pony, and a plastic rocket-"

"Captain Reynolds, I should tell you, so that you don't waste your time: you can't make me angry."
"Please. Spend an hour with him."

"Oh yeah, hidin' up the Shepherd's skirts, that's a manful scheme."
"You wanna run this ship?!"
"Yes!"
"Well y-...you can't!"

"She is starting to damage my calm."

"So no more runnin'. I aim to misbehave."

"I'm a leaf on the wind...watch how I soar."

"Mal. Guy killed me, Mal. He killed me with a sword. How weird is that?"

"My one regret in all of this, is never being with you."
"With me? You mean to say...sex?"
"I mean to say."
"Hell with this...I'm gonna live!"