I Hope To Lose Myself For Good

lil_button @ 2005-04-14T13:51:00

2005-04-14T03:51:02Z

I've moved.

Click here to be redirected.

Thanks for the memories!

lil_button @ 2004-12-04T10:08:00

2004-12-03T23:15:30Z

soad_guitarist?

Rayne? RAYNE?! Where are you?!

sooooo laaateee

2004-11-26T03:18:45Z

If I recall correctly, yesterday was Kim's birthday. I need to email her, if I could just remember my bloody Gmail password.

I doubt she'll read this, but on the off chance that she does...

Happy Birthday, Kimmish!

P.S - Am busy with off-line life, a sister getting engaged, and my brother attempting to travel cross country against my parent's wishes. Shall return soon with icons and many long winded rants.

P.P.S - Icon changes. ;)

i was scared, tired and underprepared

2004-11-01T13:55:33Z

Alias Icons. Experimental batch using pretty parchment and ornament brushes, as well as tons of gradients. Oh, and there's some David Anders icons, as well as two from his appearance on CSI.

Usual rules apply (comment; credit; don't direct link; don't customize blanks without my permission).

Preview:

Icons
01. 02. 03. 04.

05. 06. 07. 08.

09. 10. 11. 12.

13. 14. 15. 16.

17. 18. 19. 20.

21. 22.

Blanks
23. 24. 25. 26.

27. 28. 29. 30.

31. 32. 33. 34.

35. 36. 37. 38.

39. 40. 41. 42.

43. 44.

Credits and Lyrics
+ Brush links can be found here. Parchment brushes came from 1greeneye.net.
+ Caps came from Cappiness; David Anders publicity shots from Alias-Media; Travis/CSI shots are courtesy of corngirl_jo.

02,04. Something Corporate - "She Paints Me Blue"
06. Frou Frou - "Hear Me Out"
07. Bush - "40 Miles From The Sun"
08, 12. Lifehouse - "Sick Cycle Carousel"
09. Inspired by Maroon 5's "Rag Doll"
10. Switchfoot - "Meant To Live"
11. Oasis - "Little By Little"
13. Lifehouse - "Everything"
14. Switchfoot - "I Dare You To Move"
16. Damien Rice - "Amie"
18. Lifehouse - "Only One"
19. Green Day - "Time Of Your Life"
20. Switchfoot - "On Fire"
22. Snow Patrol - "Run"

there's so much more than empty conversations filled with empty words

2004-09-28T21:16:56Z

First of all, Happy Birthday, heliopath!. I hope you have a great day!

Second of all, is it just me or did the climate just change drastically? Yesterday, I spent the day wondering whether I was running a fever, but now, I'm pretty certain that Spring has decided to let itself become apparent. Damn season. I want my winter back again, please!

Thirdly, icons. Fruits Basket icons. HP icons coming whenever I get around to finishing them.

Rules are the same as always (comment; credit; don't direct link; don't alter blanks without my permission).

Be warned, there is one spoilery icon in here from chapter 97. Not that spoiler, but you catch my drift. You've been warned, so don't come screaming to me about how your eyes have been damaged by teh evil spoilerz!

Preview:

01. 02. 03. 04.
05. 06. 07. 08.
09. 10. 11. 12.
13. 14. 15. 16.
17. 18. 19. 20.
21. 22. 23.

BLANKS
24. 25. 26. 27.
28. 29. 30. 31. 32. 33. 34. 35. 36. 37. 38. 39. 40. 41. 42. 43. 44. 45. 46.

Credits
Caps and brush links can be found in my memories.
Lyrics used on these icons are assorted--ask if you're curious. Also, if you're going to complain about tiny text, don't. It's meant to be that way.

i don't why i can't keep my eyes off of you

2004-09-23T05:58:17Z

Okay, so I went scowering. Everyone's gabbing about Lost and being in the situation that I am (an Australian on dial-up), I couldn't help myself. When am I going to get to view teh pretty?

Apparently, not until next year. Like Alias and Felicity, the Seven Network will probably pick up Lost as long as it doesn't get scrapped before 13 episodes. (This probably means that I'm going to have to buy Firefly on DVD instead of waiting for itto miraculously appear on Seven as well).

Collected from here.

Executives at Seven are hoping that some of the new programs they might get from their output deals with US program suppliers such as 20th Century Fox, MGM and Walt Disney will be hits when they launch in the United States later this month.

(The Australian networks do not have to take a new series if it is axed after less than 13 weeks in the United States.)

Seven is confident that the new US series Boston Legal, Desperate Housewives and Lost will be successful here. Its rivals concede that Desperate Housewives, a "dramedy" from Disney, could catch on in Australia.

you feel it when they take it away

2004-09-17T20:22:12Z

There is a reason that coffee and I don't mix. One of us usually ends up getting hurt.

So far, it's Coffee - 14 / Kay - 0. I never win.

Caffeine has it's consequences, and now I'm going to inflict them upon you all (if you dare click the LJ cuts, that is).

Many of you may not know this, but most of my one-shots? Were written in the wee hours of the morning. I blame my own stupidity for this. My muse usually kicks in whenever I want to sleep, and since I couldn't sleep today, I had to write.

The one thing I bar myself from writing in the mornings is my WiPs (which, trust me, are better off not being added to with me getting all jittery). Right now, all I can do is listen to really soft and calming music and hope to god that I can stay up for another 14 hours. It's currently 5:55am and I'm starting to shiver and shake, which means I have to stop drabbling and post.

I now present... unbeta'd drabbles! Be afraid! Be very afraid! See that there? That's my first attempt at femmeslash, and I don't think I've ever really experimented with slash like I have this morning. Apart from one drabble for hd100 (this is such a shameless pimp, btw. JOIN, NOW.), I've never really written slash or implied it in any of my previous fanfiction.

Bad Kay. No cookie.

Any constructive criticism anyone might have for anything below is deeply appreciated. I'm usually a cotton candy-ish writer, so this is me trying to be more mature (yeah, right) and write something a little more serious.

Those Damned Slytherins; PG-13; Ron/Pansy, Draco/Ron; 1500+ words

Ronald Weasley was not what you could call a model prefect. He was incredibly relaxed when it came to the school rules; late turning in almost half his homework and, as Hermione put it, spent most of his nights in the common room playing Exploding Snap or Wizards Chess when he ought to be doing his rounds.

During seventh year, though school security became much more tighter, he found himself wandering around the halls alone, hoping not to listen to anymore lectures from Hermione. It was during this time that he came to acquaint himself with Pansy Parkinson.

Truth be told, he never did like that girl very much during their first five years at Hogwarts, partly because of her affiliation with Draco Malfoy, and partly because she had one of the most annoying, nagging voices he had ever heard.

The problem, he soon discovered, was that she knew quite well that her voice was a powerful, unmatched weapon of mass destruction, and decided to use it to her advantage. Before you could say 'accio', she seemed to be appearing out of nowhere and from around every corner at night as he did his rounds, making the job even more tiresome and leaving the Gryffindor on the brink of despair.

'Success!' she proclaimed to herself the following mornings, watching the drowsy red head attempt to make conversation with his friends at breakfast. She was getting to him. It was a form of retribution she had never thought of before. Draco seemed intent on making life hell for Potter, and Weasley was his right hand man after all. He didn't seem to know how to handle girls, let alone talkative ones.

Indeed, it did seem that she was having some effect on Ron. In his darkest hour, he contemplated asking Harry for advice, who, being the renowned school hero, obviously had much more experience with girls. If he could handle Loony Lovegood, he could certainly find a way to deal with Pansy Parkinson. But Ron knew that Harry was far too busy dealing with the fate of the wizarding world, much less his own life, and as such, decided that the tortures of that damned Slytherin were his cross to bear.

There was only one solution. Confrontation. Not one of Ron's greatest ideas, but the only one that wouldn't involve two weeks detention afterward. The situation had already gotten way out of control--the mangy girl (and her horrible voice) had even begun invading his dreams.

So, the following night he set out from the Gryffindor Common Room and headed down his usual route, clutching his wand tightly in his hand. It was past light's out by the time she showed up, and so far he had encountered no other students out of bounds. This was undoubtedly a good sign, wasn't it?

“Weasley,” she called slyly from behind him. He turned around to face her--her hands were folded in front of her as she walked toward him, the soft click of her shoes on the stone floor were the only sound echoing around them as she caught up with him.

“Parkinson.” He glowered.

“What are you doing out here all alone again?” she quizzed him earnestly, her sing-song voice obviously resting on the edge of her tongue, just waiting to be utilized. “When exactly did Granger stop babysitting you?”

As hard as it was, he ignored her biting question and pulled her aside.

“Parkinson,” he said simply. “This has got to stop.”

She frowned. He had never called her by name, neither first nor last.

“I want you to-”

“You want me to what?” she cut in, raising her eyebrows innocently.

Ron, taken aback, took a moment to process this sentence. There was an undeniable edge in her voice which he had yet to hear ever before.

Pansy, however, seemed to process his behavior much faster than anyone could possibly have anticipated. The wheels in her head had begun turning the second she noticed the determined look on his freckled face. He was cracking, and he was trying to get rid of her.

“I want you to stay away from me,” he finally managed to say, though his voice wavered slightly.

'Ah, victory. Isn't it supposed to be sweet?' Pansy asked herself.

And for a split second, she had an epiphany. A month of stalking the enemy; of observing him from around the corner and she walking next to him, hollering in his ear about how much her feet hurt and she had yet to actually speak with him. Or rather, the two had yet to have an actual conversation.

She had spent a month of her life dedicated to annoying him senseless-- driving him up the wall-- and what did she have to show for it exactly? Nothing really. What had she gained from the experience? An irritated and tired Weasley, who, albeit, was not as much fun as an irritated and well rested Weasley.

She also had an impulse she had never had before, and without any thought of consequence and repercussion, she grabbed a hold of Ron's sleeve and yanked him into the closest classroom.

“Hey-wha-”

“Shut up!” she ordered sternly.

Ron frowned darkly and barked, “Don't tell me what to do, you... you...”

“Me... me... Me what, Weasley?”

“You... Slytherin!” he spat.

“Oh, right,” she giggled, “like that's an insult.”

“I'll tell you what, Weasley,” she said in a far too serious voice. With every syllable Ron became even more uncomfortable. “You want me to stop following you around like a lost little puppy dog. I want some compensation for the past month from which I'm to garner no reward.”

“It is not my fault that you defined the word bitch!” Ron snapped.

“Clever, Weasley,” she muttered, pacing back and forth. “But it's not like I'm going to get anything out of Draco. He's been acting somewhat hostile as of late.”

“Hey, I don't owe you anything! If anything, you owe me a month's worth of sleep.”

Pansy stopped pacing, the corners of her mouth curving into a devious little sneer. “Oh, so you've been dreaming about me, Weasley?”

Ron's eyes widened. He began babbling incoherently for a minute or so while she watched silently, laughter dancing in the back of her throat.

“I'll tell you what,” she said plainly, reaching up and undoing the green ribbons holding back her short black hair. His brown eyes watched her every movement in a mixture of trepidation and overwhelming curiosity. “You do this one, itty bitty thing for me, and I'll leave you alone for the rest of the school year.”

A large lump began forming in Ron's throat as she took a step toward him. With what little voice he had left, he managed to ask just what the favor was.

Pansy's reply was short, concise and was completed by the time she had placed her hands on Ron's fly.

***

Upon hearing the door to the classroom open, both students pulled away from one another. There had no loud booming footsteps to alert their attention previously, and in the dark room the only light came from the wand held by young man standing at the doorway. He strode forward silently, eyeing them both with an amused look on his face.

“What have we here,” said Draco, placing one hand on his hip and raising his wand higher into the air to get a better view of the couple. If there were two people in the school he hadn't expected to find performing vulgar acts in Flitwick's classroom, it was Potter's best friend and his own nursery sweetheart.

Pansy frowned at him as she stood up, smoothing out her skirt. Ron, on the other hand, had gone bright red and looked about ready to explode from embarrassment.

“What the hell are you doing here, Malfoy?” he barked as he frantically pulled up his zipper and did up his belt.

“I could ask you the same question,” Draco murmured, seemingly focused on an answer from the Slytherin standing in front of him.

“We got lost,” answered Pansy. She didn't seem at all bothered to justify herself to her fellow prefect.

Draco smirked. “Pansy, you take Charms in this classroom three times a week.” He laughed softly. “So perhaps you thought you'd try some out?”

Ron, obviously disliking the conversation at hand, balled up his fists and glared at his adversary.

“Oh, bugger off, Malfoy,” he spat contemptuously. For a moment, nobody in the room said anything, or even moved a muscle. Pansy didn't seem at all surprised by Ron's outburst, and seemed more focused on whether her skirt was on back to front. Finally, Draco cocked his head to it's side and slowly crossed the room. This caught her attention.

He reached up and grasped Ron's tie, winding it around his pale hand as a small half-smile appeared on his lips.

“I'll tell you what, Weasley,” he said softly, leaning forward as his voice dropped to a whisper. “It would be my pleasure.”

The Hardest To Hear; PG; Narcissa/Pansy; 155 words

When Pansy was a child, her mother used to tell her extraordinary stories. You'd think this was an impossibility, having been born into a world where amazing sights could be considered outdated. Every night, she'd listen intently to tales of woe begotten princesses; fearless knights and terrifying, menacing dragons, and every night would end with a soft kiss on the forehead as she fell away, dreaming of the impossible.

When Pansy falls asleep nowadays, an adult who left her innocence behind at the age of sixteen, the whisper in her ear is sharp and cold. The stories are ones she has no interest in, but listens to nonetheless. There's a happy ending in here, somewhere, says the narrator, and like before, she believes these fantasies but for a second. Lips brush against Pansy's skin, but never her forehead, and she is never told to sleep tight.

Narcissa Malfoy's stories are always the hardest to hear.

Restless; G; Draco/Harry; 195 words

You would think that after a rough game of Quidditch, Harry Potter would be exhausted. Night had fallen house ago and despite a gracious victory celebration, but he had yet to fall asleep. Tossing and turning in bed, he silently prayed that he could close his eyes and not open them up again until he was ready to embrace the next day.

He was restless. His body was overwhelmingly hot, and he considered for a moment whether to strip down and toss a pitcher of water over his head just to ease the tension. Considering the fact that he shared a dorm with four other boys, he didn't think it would be wise for them to wake up and find him stark naked under the covers.

Sighing, he tossed off his scarlet and gold covers, put on his glasses, crossed the room and sat himself down in front of the window. His eyes instantly strayed to the Quidditch pitch and a small smile tugged at his lips as he remembered the game that played itself out hours earlier.

No matter how hard Draco tried, he couldn't catch the Snitch. Harry, however, was a different matter.

Dude. Don't keep Muse on your playlist when you're trying to stay calm. The second Agitated started, I was all, 'oh god, I think I'm dying.' And not in the loving way that I usually am. Also, the Ron/Pansy? Is because of maegunnbatt's Priah, which I've started reading and am liking very much, indeed.

Fruits Basket caps - episodes 7 and 8.

2004-09-13T03:21:34Z

Happy Birthday, idroppedarice! *listens to Muse especially for you*

And because I just finished uploading them: Furuba caps. A few are from episode 7 (the one where we first meet Hatori and Momiji) but most of them are from episode 8 (the one when Tohru goes to visit Hatori at Sohma house).

Most caps are of Tohru; Hatori; Momiji; Kana; Kyou and Yuki.

Just remember to comment and credit if you're going to use any for icons or whatnot. Please don't redistribute the caps without my prior permission.

Download link: here
Password: nohotlinking

Harry Potter icons!

2004-08-30T02:08:51Z

LJ wants to kill me. I can see it in it's eyes. It's determined to drive me mad by repeatedly going into 'technical difficulties' mode whenever I try to comment on anyone's journal's.

Don't worry, my sweet... you'll get yours...

Anyway, Potter icons. Played on different styles, and used the over-textured trick once more. I think I've realized my major let down when it comes to icons--the lighting. I'm terrible at it. But hey, icon making = fun.

Regular rules apply (comment; credit; don't customize bases without my permission; no direct linking).

Preview:

01. 02. 03. 04.
05. 06. 07. 08.
09. 10. 11. 12.
13. 14. 15. 16.
17. 18.

BASES
19. 20. 21. 22.
23. 24. 25. 26.
27. 28. 29. 30.
31. 32. 33. 34.

-- Images are from The Hogwarts Galleries.
-- Brushes used in these icons are by teh_indy, crumblingwalls and calixa.

Alias and Fruits Basket icons!

2004-08-29T02:04:06Z

The textures are strong in these ones. HP icons will probably be coming tomorrow, if I can think of any text to slap on them.

Dial-up users, beware. This post contains over 70 icons, and as such, might take forever to load.

Normal rules apply (comment; credit; don't direct link; don't customize bases without my permission).

Previews: -

01. 02. 03. 04.
05. 06. 07. 08.
09. 10. 11. 12.
13. 14. 15. 16.
17. 18. 19. 20.
21. 22. 23. 24.
25. 26. 27. 28.
29. 30. 31. 32.
33. 34. 35. 36.
37. 38. 39. 40.
41. 42. 43. 44.
45. 46. 47. 48.
49. 50. 51.

If anybody wants bases for any of the above icons, just ask and I'll post them.

Alias Icons.

Preview:

52. 53. 54. 55.
56. 57. 58. 59.
60. 61. 62. 63. 64.

Alias Bases
65. 66. 67. 68.
69. 70. 71. 72.
73. 74. 75. 76.
77.

Fruits Basket caps - episodes 10 and 11

2004-08-24T02:10:59Z

First of all, GIP! I really, really wish I'd saved the PSD for this icon. Lyrics are from Something Corporate's I Want To Save You, and it inspired the overtextured icons that I'll be posting up soon.

Haru + Kisa = Cuteness.

And now I present caps. They're mostly from the tenth episode of the anime series (the one where Haru makes his first appearence), but I've included some from the eleventh episode (the Valentine's Day episode) so I could have some Momiji and Kagura caps.

Many caps of Haru, Kyou, Yuki and Tohru.

Rules
All I ask is that the caps not be redistributed without my permission and that you don't hotlink to them. Credit is nice, but not necessary for icons and graphics, etc.

Album link: Click here
Password: nohotlinking

Now, I have fic to read/review and comments to reply to if I don't get bumped off the computer.

give me miles and miles of mountains, and i'll ask for the sea

2004-08-01T00:57:44Z

First of all: much thanks to pinkdaze and acony_bell for keeping me entertained yesterday. Oh, those crazy ladies!

Now for some Sarkney fanart. Made it with corngirl_jo's Bends In The Undergrowth on my mind, but I ended up scraping my original idea and making something completely unrelated. Only difference with this piece and any other that I've made is that I give a little insight as to how I made it.

Caps: Sarkasm, Cappiness
Texture: Orchidee @ Creative
Font: Times New Roman
Lyrics: Staind - "Outside"

First of all, let me just say that when I decided on this idea for fanart, I had a theme going on here. A cold, icy theme. Naturally, the color I associate with 'ice' is light blue, so I started off with a multi-shaded (blue) reflective gradient.

On top of it, I put the texture I wanted to use. It was a greenish-whiteish-decaying kind of texture, so it was perfect--not to strong, but effective enough. I didn't resize the texture to fit the image (which is what I usually do). Instead, I just moved it around until the texture was evened out on the places I wanted it to be. Having an image that's completely textured isn't always a plus. I toyed with the blend mode, but most likely rested on Soft Light and Screen.

Next, I took the image of Sydney that I wanted to use. She wasn't all happy and bouncy, which is what I was going for. I pasted her image into the window and set her to screen. I then lowered the saturation on her layer by 90%.

Following this, I took my magic wand tool, set the feathering to 17px and selected everything outside of her face on my right-hand side. I did this a few times, just to pick up any stray pixels.

I then duplicated her layer (while it's still screened) I think around three times, and set the fourth Sydney!layer on Soft Light. Now she looked somewhat solid, but still had the texture lurking on her face.

Then came the Sark image. I took one of corngirl_jo's caps, resized it (made the height around 200 pixels or something) and pasted it into the image. I then took my shape tool and implemented a tv-screen shaped box on top of his picture (on a new layer). The tv-screen shaped box shape can be found at the Creative boards for free download.

I rasterized the shape layer and used the magic wand tool to select it. I contracted the selection by 3 pixels and deleted everything on the inside. Deselect and blur it (Filter -- Blur -- Blur More).

I then selected everything on the outer side of the tv-screen shaped box. I then selected the Sark!layer and deleted everything outside the box.

Now we have a transparent!Sark to deal with, so I set his layer to 'Screen' and did the same thing I did with Sydney--duplicated (Layer -- Duplicate Layer...) him multiple times, and finally topped him off with a 'Soft Light' layer.

Finally, I made a 2px wide border (Edit -- Stroke) in white, and added a few more tv-screen shaped boxes on lowered opacities.

Next came text. That was almost as hard as all of the above. Originally I was going to use Rufus Wainwright lyrics from the beginning (It's a cold and it's a broken hallelujah), but at that very minute Staind's Outside started playing. So yeah, I scrapped the lyrics and just went with what I heard.

They're all in Times New Roman. The small text underneath 'and I'm looking in' reads:

i can see through you, see your true colors

The top paragraph of lyrics is set to Soft Light, unlike the lyrics below.

The small text underneath the large "SEE YOUR TRUE COLORS" reads, "inside you're ugly, you're ugly like me, i can see through you".

There. See. Simple as pie! This is basically how I do most of my art, only usually it involves a lot more textures, images, lyrics and even brushes. The blend modes vary a lot of the time, but the one thing I've learned in my short stint as a digital artist is that blend modes are your friend.

Now I need to lie down.

John Mayer icons. Yay!

2004-07-24T16:15:25Z

They're heeeeere. acony_bell, they're here! I'm so glad I finally finished them. I was worried that they'd be sitting in that poor folder for so long. It's funny how insomnia and chocolate milk can help me with Photoshop. Don't ask why. All I can really say is that my sleeping pattern is screwed up, so I'm going to be up all night and probably day, trying to make myself over-tired.

Anyway. Some of these are old JM icons I made. Guess what? They're not very pretty. But some of them are tonight's work, and I'm squeeing because I love how some of them came out.

Usual rules apply (comment; credit; don't direct link; don't customize bases without permission).

Teaser:

01. 02. 03. 04. 05. 06. 07.

BASES
08. 09. 10. 11. 12. 13. 14.

Credits
-- Caps from Google Image Search and John Mayer Eye Candy.
-- Brushes listed here.

01, 06. John Mayer - "Back To You"
02, 05, 07. John Mayer - "Come Back To Bed"
03. John Mayer - "St. Patrick's Day"
04. John Mayer - "Man On The Side"

By the way, if you can't tell, the 'boxing' technique is snagged from both hecatesknickers and dtissagirl. Bad Kay. Very bad Kay.

i fell in love with a dream that i built of you

2004-07-24T12:15:11Z

So... JKR is pregnant with her third child. All I can really say is congratulations! And today (or yesterday?) was Dan Radcliffe's birthday. Big day in the not so fannish part of the HP fandom.

By the way: John Mayer's "Man on the Side" is my new favorite crack. I really need to finish those icons. I've just been so caught up trying different styles and techniques, and attempted Fruits Basket icons as well... Bad Kay. Finish them!

*waits patiently for her Any Given Thursday DVD*

Anyway, hobbitheart and angryhamster requested that I post up my Alias/HP crossover fic, so here it is. Oh, and this is my first time ever writing a crossover fic, so please don't hurt me (and if you must, please don't use any sharp objects).

Title: Sorting Milo Rambaldi
Disclaimer: I don't own Harry Potter or Alias in any way, shape or form. No copyright or trademark infringement is intended.
Note: If you've never watched Alias, you probably won't understand the ending. Similarly, if you've never read Harry Potter, you won't understand what the hell's happening.

-----

The hat was a ragged one, and obviously very dusty. It's songs were always playful, and almost every house took pride in it whenever they were mentioned. The quivering first years, all so small and nervous, were led like lambs to slaughter as the hat decided their fates.

“Gryffindor!”

“Ravenclaw!”

“Hufflepuff!”

“Slytherin!”

Each house applauded loudly, and the teachers observed each student like their next science project. After all, they'd have seven long years to mould their minds to suit the ideals of their houses.

The line soon began to thin as each young child took their place in the crowd. No longer the center of gathered attention, their presence would be forgotten by the same time the next day. Most children were sorted rather quickly, and many students were certain that the feast would come within a matter of minutes.

As the latest Ravenclaw student headed toward it's table, a young boy was called to the stool, sitting himself down gingerly and grimacing as the dirty old hat was placed on his head.

“Well, what have we here ...” The hat whispered in his ear.

The boy stayed silent, gripping the side of the stool tightly.

“What's the matter boy? Cat got your tongue?”

Still, he didn't reply. His head swam with different conclusions, though. 'The hat said the word 'cat'. Cats are much like lions. Am I to be a Gryffindor?'

“Gryffindor?!” barked the hat. “No, dear boy. Not Gryffindor for you ... And you're most certainly not Hufflepuff material. My god, you're far too self reliant for Hufflepuff. No time for anyone else, 'eh?”

The boy sat motionless. 'If I say yes, does that mean I'm influencing which house I'm to be sorted into? Or does it mean he merely wants my opinion? The hat is supposed to choose which house I'm supposed to partake upon, that much I'm certain of. It's best I don't interfere.'

“Well, you're quite the thinker, aren't you? Can't seem to stop analyzing me for one second. Obviously it's going to be a little harder to sort you. Since Gryffindor and Hufflepuff are out of the question, we've only Slytherin and Ravenclaw left.”

'Ravenclaw,' thought the boy. 'The house for intellectuals. Notorious for producing many of the great minds me know today.'

“So you'd like to be a Ravenclaw?” asked the hat, slyly.

The boy didn't reply.

“You do. I can see that you do. That you want to learn, and that you have the capacity to become greater beyond your wildest dreams.”

'Greatness,' thought the boy. 'Greatness is to gain, and greatness can be lost. Greatness can be surpassed.'

“Indeed, it can,” the hat replied. “And as such, Ravenclaw can help you gain whatever you wish. But will you be able to keep it?”

“No,” the boy murmured under his breath. “Not Ravenclaw...”

“Slytherin!” the hat roared, and the hall which had been silent for a good long ten minutes burst into relieved applause.

Milo Rambaldi stood up, removing the hat from his head and setting it down gently on the vacant stool. He silently crossed the hall and sat himself down at the Slytherin table, meeting each of his house mates with a small half smile.

In a matter of minutes, the rest of the students had been sorted and the Headmaster stood up to give a speech. While he attempted to listen to the man's words, he soon found his thoughts trailing to the mound of parchment in the pocket of his robes. As soon as the Headmaster finished his speech, he ignored the food that appeared on the table in front of him and extracted his journal, reading through pages upon pages of notes he'd written earlier that day.

“What have you there?” the blonde haired girl on his right asked as she passed him the mashed potatoes. He looked up in surprise, frowning at the girl staring at his notes.

“Can you read that?” she asked, pointing to the strange symbols littering the page.

“I wrote it,” he mumbled to her. She seemed somewhat impressed.

“What language is it?” she asked.

The same familiar, small smile returned to his face and he tucked the book back into his robes.

“My own,” he answered smartly, before reaching across the table and retrieving an apple. The girl began chattering away, and once again he drifted into his distracted state. Hogwarts was not a safe place for all of his secrets. Magic could be a powerful weapon--one which could even work against him in the long run.

He'd have to find some way to conceal them.

“Try this fruit juice, Alexandra,” a boy down the table insisted. “It has a rather unique taste. They only use it for welcoming feasts. It's a well guarded recipe.”

Well, now Milo's thoughts were racing once more.

~Fin

-----

Rambaldi = really smart 16th century inventor who wrote computer code before they were actually invented and drew up plans for modern day inventions way back then = put to death for believing that science could one day help the world understand god = now, centuries after his death, has everyone from the CIA to the Covenant searching for his inventions.

To explain the ending: remember the Rambaldi fluid needed to make Page 47 of his journal become readable? Well, draw your own conclusions. And Rambaldi's being a Slytherin is credited to toastandtea, whose Slytherin!Rambaldi icon ~~demanded~~ influenced his choice house.

Rambaldi = evil genius. After all, if he planned for 'the chosen one' to turn over her eggs centuries later, he's obviously off his nutter. That and his inventions are influencing people to do bad. So yeah. He's ambitious and cunning. And he's arrogant, seeing as how he somehow preserved himself for so fucking long.

I honestly hate Rambaldi. I really do. He screwed up my favorite television show. Hopefully they're doing as they're implying and pushing his plot waaaay back into the queue. I'd much rather we had the whole friends/family vibe in S4, and we can't really have that if Sydney's spendign every second of every day hunting down his latest gadget.

So why did I write him if I hate him? Because it's somewhat plausible in crossover world. His intellect could have been nourished in magic. And though he's been a prominent force in the Alias-verse, we haven't really delved into his past. Needless to say, I'm making peace with Mr. Rambaldi. But if he screws up the future of my TV show, I'll kill him myself. Many times. With those sharp objects I've asked you to yield from using.

Community Plugs:

fannish_walls -- community dedicated solely to wallpapers. Just as long as they have a fandom!

ickle_firsties -- smut writing community those between the ages of 13 and 17.

fanfiction rant + random recs

2004-07-18T07:52:27Z

I was asked today by a close friend as to why I shipped Dramione. This friend was rather polite about it, so the entire rant below was not included in my explanation. The funny thing was, I never really thought as to why. Rather I just do. And then it made me think, why does anyone ship anything? This friend, might I add, is a dead set Ron/Hermione, Harry/Ginny shipper. So suddenly, it just came to me as to why I ship them.

Because the shipper sees something inside of two characters (or three, or four, or ten) which seems to just click. And they like the fact that they click. So they write and read fanfiction, and they post at forums and get to know fellow shippers without really knowing why, but rather that they enjoy what they have in front of them.

Sure, sometimes there are nauseating pieces of Dramione fic (makeover!Hermione and goth!Draco!), but nobody makes me read it. I can freely ignore it and go read post-Hogwarts fic like the good little shipper that I am. And what's more is that I don't see the hate for any ship at all. Why do you read a ship that you apparently hate? Is anybody forcing you to? Don't you know how to use the Back button?

Hate is a powerful word, and what's more is that hate can only be defined by the motivation behind it. Do you hate it because it pairs a character of your OTP with a character you dislike? Because you don't like how some fanfiction ruins the characters (and there are always bad apples in the barrel for every ship, from R/Hr to Blaise/Umbridge)? Because you're not willing to accept a change (for better or for worse) within a character?

AND I don't understand the hate for anything that doesn't coincide with canon. I mean, for fuck sake, fanon and canon are seperate. Do I believe Dramione will be canon? No. Do I believe Sirius/Bellatrix will be canon? No. Do I believe that Draco/Harry will be canon? No. But that doesn't mean I'll stop reading fanfiction. AND WHO THE HELL ONLY SHIPS SOMETHING BECAUSE THEY THINK IT'LL END UP AS CANON? What kind of sick logic is that?

"Oh, I'll try and be on the winning team! Yay me! Watch me bash people who dare write Blackcest just because I don't think it'll end up in canon!"

Shipping is about the CHARACTERS, but can be/should be/is in a lot of ways, MOTIVATED by canon. It's not about what will happen in the books.

I'll never ever bash another ship. Never, ever, ever. I may dislike a certain pairing, but I'll never hate it. I may never understand why people care for it, but I understand now that it's existence is for those who want it, and for those who open-mindedly seek it out.

But back to the point: why do I ship Dramione?

Why does anyone ship anything?

Why do people write slash, het, non-con, and incest?

Because they want to see it written, to see how the characters survive through it. What challenges will they face? How intriguing can they get? What are the consequences and repercussions of actions in store for these characters?

It's because these characters, they intrigue me. I feel that their dynamic in both canon and fanon needs to be explored more, and what can I say? I'm an explorer.

And the above probably sounded narrow minded, but honestly, I've been holding it in for awhile now and it needed to be said. It's just my personal opinion, either way.

And now, a few recs:

Fanfiction:
-- Sanity In Azkaban by a_is_for_amy
Summary: How does Hermione fill her days in Azkaban? Not a happy story.
Quote: 'The smell here is indescribable. I don't know if it's any one smell, or just a combination of human decay and waste, the moldy straw that makes up our 'beds', and the Dementors that are ever present.'

-- Lost by Simone2677
Summary: Alice Longbottom tries to remember a certain someone. This is probably the most tragic cookie I've ever read.
Quote: 'I’m right here, underneath this shell. I’m here…they didn’t take me away.'

Art: Edgeworld's art. Some of the most gorgeous art I've ever seen! I'm loving the Draco/Luna sketch, and there's so many gorgeous pieces to admire... Now I wish I could draw.

Site: DramioneFix.com's forums. *glomps cherii_emrei and acony_bell*

Come join in with the Dramione love! Del and Linzi's little hide-away with relatively new forums, but a lot of familiar faces!

People Pimp: I know for a fact vrendo would like some more company, so let's all go friend and bother her. She has a gorgeous new layout up as well.

Dude. I spoke to Kim last night. God, I've missed her. It's been around a year since I left FC, and we actually went back and got ourselves glined. Does anyone know whether I was actually glined when I told off Adam? I never did find out. And the son of a bitch wouldn't answer me.

Ah, well. The important part is that Kim and I seemed to have made up and hopefully, we'll be KimnKay once more.

-----

Also, acony_bell is my half-sister, twice removed and adopted as my very young aunt. God, I love her. She always does something to catch me off guard! I must do something to rival this affection. I must! Anything!

is this where the tortured and the trouble find their own

2004-07-14T18:07:44Z

I'm so fucking strung out right now, I swear. This is what I get for re-watching Carrie next to a gas heater, and now I'm kicking my Internet Explorer, which keeps freezing every time I try to log into Gmail.

I'm having a very rough month. How are you all doing?

Dad's going to be home within a week's time. Now that is where all this anxiety is stemming from. I need a distraction. Usually I would turn to my always engaging television, only the few shows I still love seem to have disappeared, and everything is crap nowadays (except for the Australian Idol eps, which are hilarious).

So far I've made three John Mayer icons, around ten HP icons (which I completely despise), two Harry Potter wallpapers, seven Alias icons (which I now detest greatly) and around five presentable BtVS/A:tS icons. All this because I'm stuck on Dial-Up.

Gacked from savvyfairy

Child of the 90's Meme
BOLD things you have done.

1. You've ever ended a sentence with the word "PSYCH!"
2. You watched the Pound Puppies.
3. You can sing the rap to the "Fresh Prince of Bel Air.
4. You wore biker shorts under your skirts and felt stylish.
5. You yearned to be a member of the Baby-Sitters Club and tried to start a club of your own.
6. You owned those little Strawberry Shortcake pals scented dolls.
7. You know that "WOAH" comes from Joey on Blossom.
8. Two words: M.C. Hammer Can't touch this, bebbeh.
9. If you ever watched "Fraggle Rock."
10. You had plastic streamers on your handle bars.
11. You can sing the entire theme song to "Duck Tales."
12. You remember when it was actually worth getting up early on a Saturday to watch cartoons.
13. You wore a ponytail on the side of your head.
14. You saw the original "Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles" on the big screen.
15. You got super-excited when it was Oregon Trail day in computer class at school.
16. You played the game "MASH".
17. You wore a Jordache Jean jacket and you were proud of it.
18. L.A. Gear
19. You wanted to change your name to "JEM" in Kindergarten.
20. You remember reading "Tales of a fourth grade nothing" and all the Ramona books.
21. You know the profound meaning of "WAX ON, WAX OFF."
22. You wanted to be a Goonie.
23. You ever wore flourescent clothing.
24. You can remember what Michael Jackson looked like before his nose fell off.
25. You have pondered why Smurfette was the only female smurf.
26. You took plastic cartoon lunch boxes to school.
27. You remember the CRAZE, then the BANNING of slap bracelets.
29. You remember Hypercolor T-shirts
28. You still get the urge to say "NOT" after (almost) every sentence.
30. Barbie and the Rockers was your favorite band.
31. You thought She-Ra and He-Man should hook up.
32. You thought your childhood friends would never leave because you exchanged friendship bracelets.
33. You owned a pair of jelly sandals.
34. After you saw Pee-Wee's Big Adventure you kept saying "I know you are, but what am I?"
35. You remember "I've fallen and I can't get up!"
36. You remember going to the skating rink before there were inline skates.
37. You ever got seriously injured on a Slip 'n' Slide.
38. You have ever played with a Skip-It.
39. You had or attended a birthday party at McDonald's.
41. You remember Popples.
42. "Don't worry, be happy."
43. You wore like, EIGHT pairs of socks over tights.
44. You wore socks scrunched down.
45. "Miss MARY MACK MACK MACK, all dressed in BLACK BLACK BLACK"
46. You remember boom boxes vs. CD players.
47. You remember watching both "Gremlins" movies.
48. You knew what it meant to say "Care Bear Stare!"
49. You remember watching Rainbow Brite and My Little Ponies.
50. You thought Doogie Howser was hot.
51. You remember Alf, the lil furry brown alien from Melmac.
52. You remember New Kids on the Block when they were cool.
53. You knew all the characters names and their life stories on "Saved By the Bell," the ORIGINAL class.
54. You know all the words to Bon Jovi - "YOU GIVE LOVE A BAD NAME".
55. You played and or collected "Pogs"
56. You used to pretend that you could transform into a Power Ranger.

Of course, many of these were achieved by watching late night Nickelodeon. ;)

Anyway, it's time for a Sarkney wallpaper, since Photoshop is my friend. I'll post the Harry Potter wallpapers later, since it's almost 4am. Can you tell how screwed up my sleeping pattern is? Must fix immediately.

1024x786 | 800x600

Texture: InfinitFan
Lyrics: Something Corporate - "Konstantine"; Dashboard Confessional - "Vindicated"
Caps: corngirl_jo's

Shit. Cybertarp (my image host) has decided to disallow hotlinking, so I'm going to have to find a new place to host all my wallpapers. Any suggestions? Photobucket and Trenzhost both have kb limits, and since these are wallpapers we're talking about, the 1024 versions usually go over the limit.

Now I'm off to go download all my old wallpapers ON DIAL-UP FOR GOODNESS SAKE to make sure that I don't lose them.

alias_challenge entries.

2004-07-09T06:51:58Z

Because the caps were just sitting there in front of me, begging to be used. That and it's too cold to go outside and enjoy myself. *hugs frozen toes*

Usual rules apply (comment; credit; don't customize bases without permission)

Teaser:

1. 2. 3. 4. 5.

Bases (because we all love bases) ;)
6. 7. 8. 9. 10.

Credits
- Brushes are listed in my memories.
- Caps by _jems_
01. Maroon 5 - Secret
02. Something Corporate - Down
03. Ben Folds Five - Brick
04. Something Corporate - Konstantine
05. Radiohead - How To Disappear Completely

'cause maybe, you're gonna be the one that saves me

2004-06-23T18:35:26Z

I really didn't realize it was this late tonight. I've been up all night watching season one episodes (mainly because I never really liked Noah and tried to avoid watching him as much as possible), and just got really sidetracked. Oh, and I half-watched Queen of The Damned on Movie One, so I decided I'd rid myself of whatever's left of my crappy!movie obsession and just make a few icons.

By the way, new favorite song. Haven't heard it in ages, so I'm just going to make it repeat over and over again. Need to avoid listening to John Mayer, as it's becoming impossible to stop (I blame Helen and Linzi!). Self is on such a music binge right now, though I'm already over my download limit for the month.

Anyway, usual rules apply (comment; credit; don't direct link; don't customize bases without my permission).

Teaser:

01. 02. 03. 04.

BASES
05. 06. 07. 08.

01. Deftones - Change (In The House Of Flies).
02. Jay Gordon - Slept So Long
03,04. David Draiman - Forsaken

Brushes used listed here.
Caps by anesthezea, over at cap_it.

Keep Smiling - G? PG? - slight Harry/Ginny

2004-06-20T17:10:35Z

Woe is me, for my writer's block is cruel and unusual and I've never written Harry/Ginny before, despite my love for such a couple. Woe, I say! Woe!

Despite all the 'woe' and the fact that I never ever say that I love any of my writing, I do like where this piece went. And it's over a thousand words, so yay me!

Title: Keep Smiling
Fandom/Main Characters: HP: Ginny and Harry
Disclaimer: Characters and places depicted here are the property of JK Rowling, Warner Bros and various other corporations. No money is being made and no copyright or trademark infringement is intended.
Summary: Two weeks after Harry's defeat of Lord Voldemort, Ginny starts visiting him in the hospital wing.
Author's Note: Written in the second person, since I've always had trouble getting inside Ginny's head and thought I'd kill myself. There's implied Harry/Ginny, I guess, but there is absolutely no fluff here. There is angst. Angst is always good.

On Sunday morning, you visit him in the hospital wing. It's downcast outside, and the rain pelting against the windows of the old castle makes the atmosphere even more dreary. You wonder if he notices these kinds of things despite the two weeks earlier, in which his life had taken a turn for the worse.

He'd come face to face with Lord Voldemort once again, and he'd used his bare hands to drive Gryffindor's sword through his belly, having managed to disarm his nemesis.

He'd killed the one entity who'd cursed his life for the past seventeen years. Such a pity it had taken so long.

But he's smiling as you sit down next to his bed and offer him a bar of chocolate. He's grinning at you, and his friends who came along. And you grin back, because you're hardly going to look upset when he seems so delighted.

You're only granted five minutes to speak with him, though Ron and Hermione do most of the talking. Harry doesn't speak at all. He merely nods, smiles, looks out the window on occasion. You wonder whether he still thinks Voldemort could still be out there. You know he doesn't. He wouldn't be smiling if he thought it possible.

Hermione hugs him before you leave, and you can see Ron's not sure whether he should do the same. They're friends either way. Friends can hug. Friends are supposed to hug. Harry doesn't mind. He just keeps smiling.

-----

You have exams for the rest of the week, and Madam Pomfrey isn't too keen on letting you into the hospital wing. Apparently she's caught Ron and Hermione sneaking in at night under an invisibility cloak, and isn't too happy about it. You don't get a chance to see Harry on Monday, nor Tuesday.

When Wednesday rolls around, you anxiously wait outside the hospital wing well before breakfast. It doesn't matter whether you'll be allowed in--it's the thought that counts. Surprisingly enough, Madame Pomfrey allows you inside. She just seems glad that Ron and Hermione aren't by your side. You've got Harry's photo album in your hands, and you gingerly tuck it under his pillow as you sit down next to a groggy Harry. Apparently he's just woken up, and Madame Pomfrey is heading off to collect his toast and eggs.

“Do you want to talk?” you ask, but he doesn't reply.

He just keeps smiling, and you wonder whether that smile is the same one he greets everyone with, or whether it's meant for only you. You take his hand in yours and sit next to him on his bed, laying your head on his shoulder.

“It's over now,” you whisper in his ear. “At least I think it is.”

He doesn't confirm or deny that sinking feeling in your stomach that this isn't the end. That everything that was the by-product of Voldemort's reign has been eradicated.

“You can talk to me, you know,” you continue. But before anything else can be said, Madame Pomfrey arrives with his breakfast, and begins to lecture you about the importance of a good meal to start the day on. You merely nod, ignoring her words. You can't seem to focus on anything she says as she sets the tray down on the bedside table.

Harry doesn't seem to hear her either, though you wonder whether his ignorance is caused by the years of repeatedly spending nights in the hospital wing. Had he spent one year at Hogwarts without ending up in the same old chamber? He watches the nurse for a moment, before turning his attention to your face.

It feels like old times. He won't stop smiling.

-----

You spend the rest of the week concentrating on your exams, knowing that you've got to at least get average grades. So what if you've survived a near apocalypse, you've still got school in the morning. You've got one more year to go, you may as well make this one count.

Friday night arrives and you're finally free. No more school. No more worries. Just you and the rest of your house enjoying a celebration well earned. Ron begs you to ask Colin whether you can borrow his camera and with much hesitation, he agrees. Both you and your brother then make your way down to the hospital wing where Neville, Luna and Hermione are already waiting for you, laughing and enjoying sweets as they camp around Harry's bed. You think back to your fourth year and the adventure the six of you had partaken in.

You hadn't even thought about the future. Perhaps it was because there was always that constant reminder lingering deep in the back of your mind that there might not be a future. That, at any given time, it could all be over for any of you. The minute alliances were made with Harry Potter was the very minute a person's future had been signed away.

To know Harry would mean you became a part of him.

Madame Pomfrey's glares at the six of you. Obviously she's not thrilled that you're keeping her patient awake so late at night. Ron reminds her that everyone of you are in either their 6th year or above and therefore have later curfews. This only seems to irritate her more.

Before she can order you all out of the infirmary, though, you all seat yourselves on Harry's bed, assuring her that if she takes a picture of you all together, you'll promise to not put up a fight as you leave. A muscle in her forehead seems to be throbbing, but she compromises and agrees. All she wants is for her patient to rest and he can't possibly do that with his friends around.

Ron and Hermione seat themselves on either side of Harry, and Neville and Luna stand next to them on either side. You're unsure as to where your place is, and decide to just seat yourself in front of Ron. He doesn't seem to mind, and merely rests his chin on your shoulder as he beams at the camera.

After the shot is taken, you and your friends stand and start to say your goodbyes. You hug Harry, telling him you'll visit him again soon, before being ushered out by an impatient Madame Pomfrey. You watch him over your shoulder, as do Ron and Hermione, before stepping out into the corridor. You wonder for a moment whether he's upset that he missed taking his final exam, but you push the thought from your mind as you see his face.
The old Harry wouldn't have minded. Apparently this one doesn't mind either.

He just keeps smiling.

-----

You leave Hogwarts with the news that he's been sent to St. Mungo’s Hospital for Magical Maladies and Injuries. You honestly had no idea that his injuries were so serious, but there's nothing that can be done. The Dursley's don't want him back, not now that he has nowhere to go after the summer. He can't stay at Hogwarts all his life, and he's hardly in any condition to care for himself.

Everyday you wonder whether to owl Professor Dumbledore and ask whether there's any other place for Harry apart from that institute, but you know that he would never have sent one of his most valued pupils there without good cause.

You keep telling yourself that his condition will improve, given time, though you know it's a lie. You visit him every Sunday, and you see for yourself that he's still the same as you remember him that day in the hospital wing.

You know the names of his nurses off by heart now, and they know yours in return. Ten years and you're still coming back, sometimes with members of your family, Hermione, Neville or Luna, but more commonly, on your own. You sit next to Harry on his bed, lean your head on his shoulder and ask him how he is today.

You sometimes imagine he'll actually reply, and you dream that the first word he'll say in a decades time will be your name.

But he never replies. He hasn't spoken at all since that fateful day in his seventh year when he freed himself from the clutches of Lord Voldemort.

Perhaps he feels that he doesn't need words anymore. That's a lie as well, you tell yourself. Of course he needs words. Of course he wants to tell the world how glad he is to no longer be a hunted man.

But he doesn't speak to you, Ginny. Nor anybody else.

He just keeps smiling.

~Fin

Meme Goodness, because I haven't done one in ages.

2004-06-18T16:25:21Z

I don't usually dedicate an entire post to memes, but I'll make an exception for this one:

Gacked from doubleentendre7 and postingwhore

Give me 1000 comments in this entry. Or whatever, really. YOU, in particular, don't have to supply the whole 1000, but a tiny contribution would be nice. Then let me know if you post this in your journal and I'll return the favor.

Dudes, so this is your chance to spam me with anything! Pictures, lyrics, the word SPAM over and over. Feel free to tell me something about yourself, or screen your comments. Do whatever you want! It's all up to you.

Fanfiction Recs

2004-06-18T14:30:41Z

I just spent the last twenty minutes gawking at acony_bell's journal layout. John Mayer is insanely pretty. So now I've got KaZaA open, waiting for some songs by Mr. Pretty to finish downloading instead of attempting to sleep. In the meantime, I thought I'd post up a few fic recs. I seem to have lost my original fic rec list and I'm far too lazy to go looking for it, so I may just convert this to fic rec post some time in the future.

HARRY POTTER
I'll Be Home For Christmas by Slumber
Summary: I'll be home for Christmas / You can count on me ~ Ron, Hermione, and Christmas Eve during a war-torn wizarding world. Is it sweet? Yes, but bitterly so.
Favorite Quote: The continuing battle drowns Hermione's scream.

-----

Burnt Toast and Debauchery by epiphanies
Summary: Conversational between Draco and Pansy. Contains burnt toast and muggle products that deserve worthy muttering about.
Favorite Quote:"Don't patronize me, Parkinson."

"Oh, darling, I should. Believe me. Otherwise you'd never be able to inflate your head back to it's normal size."

-----

Between Werewolves by Pirate Perian
Summary: OotP, chapter 23: Mr. Weasley gets a plethora of visitors on Christmas Day, but his werewolf-bitten roommate has no visitors at all -- that is, until Remus Lupin decides to have a chat with him.
Favorite Quote: Remus laughed, remembering when he himself had had similar doubts. "Yes... so does paying attention to the phases of the moon, having exceptionally good senses of smell and hearing, and keeping secrets."

-----

ALIAS
Sticks and Stones by Alyson
Summary: Sark weighs in on the name debate.
Favorite quote: There was even one particular occasion, early in my association with Irina, where I'd pushed her too far and had to answer to Humphrey.

-----

She Doesn't Want A Cat by Ossian
Summary: Sydney acquires a pet - set at some point in S3 - (Sarkney only if you want to read it that way)
Favorite Quote: The cat keeps sticking its head into cabinets. It stalks the paper bag and she can’t help laughing. It gives her a mildly offended look and she snickers some more.

-----

Lucky Girl by Karen T
Summary: You wonder if it's possible to be destroyed by luck.
Favorite Quote: You imagined she'd understand why you knew so much about her since she, too, was raised amongst lies. You imagined she'd want to be your friend.

And now I'll go listen to lovely music and search for this one brilliant Sarkney fic which I can't seem to find despite hours of searching.

i know that goodbye means nothing at all

2004-06-12T12:15:45Z

So, we're getting a new car. Or rather, a new 4WD. My Mum and brother are on their way back from Sydney as we speak. It was either get it this weekend or postpone our trip to Wagga.

Am incredibly sick of Gina's sister. She only recently came down here to visit her family, and something tells me she doesn't like my parents. Or the fact that they're married. Or, rather the fact that one of them is white and one of them is black. All I'm saying is that I won't be visiting Gina at home until she leaves.

And I could break out into a rant about how disgusted I am, but I don't have the energy to stress to the world what we already know: there are stupid, racist people that exist. emma_malfoy summed a lot of this up eloquently recently. (Note that it's friends locked).

I'll just leave it at that.

---

This week's polls are now posted up at pan_icontest and hp_chorus, so if you've got the time, please cast your votes...

... and it seems I can't sit down at my computer without opening up Photoshop. True, I've been trying to adjust to it. True, it has a lot of fun little options and shiny buttons to entertain me (or frustrate me).

Either way, Photoshop decided to co-operate and we made a new Sark wallpaper together.

1024x768 || 800x600

Lyrics: John Mayer - "Clarity"; Something Corporate - "You're Gone"; Lifehouse - "Breathing"
Fonts: Times New Roman; Arial
Caps: DavidAnders.net
Textures: Orchidee
Brushes: crumblingwalls

ETA- Gah, I completely forgot! It's Helen's birthday today! Happy Birthday, hobbitheart!

I hope you had a fabulous day, darling!

And also, a belated Happy Birthday to ruxi, backwardsclock and faerie_dance!

Possession - PG - Bellatrix and Regulus

2004-06-11T16:07:40Z

Oh dear. I've removed the meme that was supposed to be here, because of the possibility that it's a password collecting scheme. Can't be too careful nowadays.

Anyway, drabbles are fun.

Title: Possession
Fandom/Characters: HP: Bellatrix and Regulus
Disclaimer: Characters recognized here are not mine. They belong to JK Rowling, Warner Bros, etc. No copyright or trademark infringement is intended.
Words: 433
Summary: Bellatrix continues her routine.
A/N: This sort of plays with my new (baseless) theory that Regulus was way younger than Bellatrix and Sirius.

She watches him as he sleeps every night. It's become routine: a familiar pattern repeated night after night as his weary body lays down to sleep. His small fingers clutch the blankets tightly and she's certain she can hear his heart beat from beside his bed.

His black hair, messy and unruly, reminds her so much of his brother that she almost turns away from him. He doesn't deserve her affection--not if he continues to act like that scum's shadow.

Her eyes, dark and narrowed, watch his chest rise and fall ever so slightly as he dreams away, not knowing that she's keeping an unnecessary vigil. That her thin, bony hands could smother him in his sleep if she had the initiative to do so. He doesn't know the many images that flash inside her head, the ones meant for his brother. The ones where Sirius, the traitor, won't wake up the next morning.

She wonders whether he can sense her presence in his sleep. Whether somehow, subconsciously, he knows the inner workings of her mind and the terrible thoughts that linger therein. She often considers asking him whether he dreams about her at all, but decides against it. Too many questions she wouldn't want to answer.

One long, thin finger traces along his cheekbone. He has no idea that the day he was born, she'd entered his nursery and performed the exact same gesture. An action which had once indicated discovery now meant reassurance. Reassurance that he had not changed. That he had not been altered in any way since the last time she'd laid eyes on him, or touched his soft milky skin, or whispered forget me nots in his ears.

He was her much younger, smaller and innocent cousin, asleep in his bed like every other night she'd spent in that house, despite the fact that ten years had passed and the raven haired infant had now turned into a raven haired child. Her fingers smooth down his untidy hair, and he stirs in his sleep. He won't wake, though. He never does.

Her eyes pull away from her cousin and she glances at the grandfather clock across the room. Seconds had revealed themselves to be minutes, and minutes to be hours. Silently, she stands and leans over his bed, placing a chaste kiss on his forehead.

She makes her way to his bedroom door, and turns the handle. Before leaving, though, her lips curl and she whispers to him, like she has every other night for the past ten years, “You're mine, Regulus Black. Mine and mine alone.”

if we can't have it all then nobody will

2004-06-11T10:31:17Z

It's Friday! It's Friday! Just three more days after today and I'll be in Wagga, watching POA! I'm counting down the days, obviously. I still have to re-read POA, GOF and OoTP before I go, though. I'm determined to--even if I have to read them in the car on the way there, and cause myself to get car sick.

But anyway, in the spirit of Potter--CoS D/Hr icons. Everyone's doing the Prisoner of Azkaban thing, so I thought I'd be boring, manip two bases and fiddle around. I'm still adjusting to Photoshop, and Paintshop was feeling lonely.

There are no bases, since it's a manip and I don't feel like sharing.

TOU
- Comment
- Credit
- Don't Direct Link

Teaser:

01. 02. 03. 04. 05. 06.

Credits
-- Brushes

01. Staind - "So Far Away"
02. Lifehouse - "Everything"
03. The Calling - "Stigmatized"
04. Spike in BtVS.
05,06. Garbage - "The World Is Not Enough"

Julian - PG-13 - Sark, Lazarey - Spoilers for 3x10: Remnants

2004-06-10T08:27:38Z

Title: Julian
Fandom/Characters/Spoilers: Alias; Sark and Lazarey; 3x10: Remnants
Disclaimer: Characters and situations recognized here are the property of ABC, JJ Abrams and Bad Robot. No copyright or trademark infringement is intended.
Rating: PG-13, for violence.
Words: 365
Summary: If you'd entered the establishment that night, you'd have covered your ears, hoping to block the scene from your mind.

If you'd have set foot inside the old abandoned school house on any other day, you would've been met with silence. The facility had not been in use for years, and the new inhabitants of said facility had only ever visited it on occasion to retrieve various items, taking only a few minutes at a time before locking it behind them and not looking back.

If you'd entered the establishment that night, you'd have covered your ears, hoping to block the scene from your mind. It showed signs of life now, dust no longer lingered on the concrete floor and various guards stood, armed to the teeth, by the doors. But they were hardly terrifying.

The screams echoing from behind a locked door were, however.

A father and son were being reunited, and the howls of pain which struggled to free themselves from the father's throat were tragically beautiful.

At least Sark thought so.

He'd pictured their reunion for years--no, wait, make that decades. Would it be in Russia with a glock? His and his father's home land? Or in England with a hunting knife, where the bastard had sent him, erasing his presence from existence? No. In the end, it had been in Warsaw, with the help of a tranq dart. He couldn't exactly kill him then and there. That would've been far too easy, and it was just his luck that the old man might know exactly where the Rambaldi cube was.

He'd taken Lazarey to Moscow, tasting the irony as they sped through the city. He hadn't even bothered to look at the man, not to his face at least.

But now, as he swept the mini-blowtorch up his father's cheek, feeling the flame melt his skin away and his body tense as he clenched his jaw to halt his own screams, Sark could see quite clearly who his father was. He could see the fear the lived in his eyes, as if Andrian Lazarey had expected for his past to one day come back and haunt him.

“Julian,” his father murmured, close to a whimper.

Sark was livid. “Do not,” he ordered stiffly, frowning darkly, “call me Julian.”