Blue MAGA, you officially lost me, but before I go, I’d like to offer you major congratulations! You won big this evening! In aligning with the Republicans, you eight Blue MAGA senators voted both to reopen the government and to kill millions of Americans who will ultimately lose their healthcare! In doing so, you put the final nail in the coffin for this Exvangelical. I can’t imagine that I’m alone.

See the thing is, in 2016 we heard the words of Red Letter Jesus as Bernie defended the sick and the poor. Instead of elevating him, you told us that our country’s very survival depended on a Hillary campaign. We cautiously trusted that you knew better than we did, as any well-trained evangelicals would. You see, we’d already been betrayed by a political party we pledged our lives to, so our commitment was deep but/and fragile.

Eight years later, you told us that Democracy and life as we knew it would be over if we didn’t vote for Kamala, despite her alignment with the Israeli government in aiding a genocide. Even still, you told us that all of our queer and black and brown and undocumented and abortion-seeking loved ones would be in danger if Kamala lost. Blue MAGA, we still trusted that on some level, you had the best interest of vulnerable Americans in mind. Many of us felt sick to our stomachs doing so, but we voted for Kamala as we carried our delusions with us to the polls. We already had enough evidence to suggest otherwise, but what can we say, we are especially at risk of deception.

This last month you fiddled with us again, giving us hope as you resisted Red MAGA in the name of every American who is owed the dignity of healthcare. Simultaneously, though, you nearly self-destructed instead of endorsing a Democratic Socialist in New York City who, by the way, sounds a lot more like the brown savior we spent our lives being taught to follow than you do. Not only that, but Blue MAGA, you endorsed a candidate who famously harassed young women and spewed anti-Muslim hate while vowing to protect war criminals. We’ve carried this kind of erratic leadership muscle memory with us, and it didn’t feel good.

But tonight, Blue MAGA, tonight is where the jig is up for this former conservative evangelical turned progressive, and I’m certain I’m not alone. We’ve spent several elections together at this point, but tonight is where you’ve crossed our ethical line, the same one the Republican party crossed when it supported an unjust war and advocated for life only up until birth, and who we stopped recognizing Jesus within. This severing feels familiar and devastating because it means, once again, being political refugees. We don’t yet register as a voting demographic but Blue MAGA, this former army of Christ moves in mass and you just f*ckd around and found out. By asking us to accept the deaths of millions of the most vulnerable of Americans tonight, The Vote Blue No Matter Genocide and Corporate Ownership Party officially lost us. Because while many of us no longer believe we are in need of a savior, it turns out that the teachings of Jesus still mirror the values we demand of our political party. Call us consistent.

So congrats, again, Blue MAGA, on your win tonight, and condolences on all of the losses.

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