Just Fucking Use It.|


            const reality = "Your startup uses Cursor.";

            const enterprise = "Fortune 500 uses Copilot.";

            const math = "There are more Fortune 500 companies than startups that survive.";


            // Choose your fighter.

⚠️ copium.diff — View Excuses (Scroll Down)

copium.diff

          -// "But Cursor has better AI"
        
          +/* Pick your model. GPT-5, Claude Opus 4.5, Gemini 2.5 Pro.
        
          + * Copilot is not locked into one provider having a bad quarter.
        
          + * Switch models like you switch Slack statuses.
        
          + * Redundancy isn't boring. It's called "enterprise architecture." */

          -// "But Cursor has Composer"
        
          +/* Copilot has Coding Agent.
        
          + * Assign an issue to Copilot. It writes the code. Opens the PR.
        
          + * Autonomously. In the background. While you're in standup.
        
          + * Your PM can literally watch it work on GitHub.com. */

          -// "But Cursor is faster"
        
          +/* Faster at what? Getting rate-limited?
        
          + * GitHub processes billions of completions daily.
        
          + * GitHub's infrastructure doesn't sweat when your Series A goes viral on HN.
        
          + * Azure scale hits different. */

          -// "But everyone cool uses Cursor"
        
          +/* 77,000 organizations use Copilot.
        
          + * Including the ones that sign your paycheck.
        
          + * "Cool" doesn't pass SOC 2.
        
          + * Your CISO doesn't care about your Twitter vibes. */

          -// "But Cursor is a VSCode fork so it's familiar"
        
          +/* So is Copilot's home.
        
          + * Except Copilot also works in Neovim, JetBrains, Visual Studio, Xcode, and Eclipse.
        
          + * GitHub meets developers where they are.
        
          + * Even the masochists. */

          -// "But I saw a killer demo on Twitter"
        
          +/* Cool. GitHub saw $2B in ARR.
        
          + * Demos are marketing. Revenue is product-market fit.
        
          + * VCs love demos. CFOs love revenue.
        
          + * You're welcome, Microsoft shareholders. */

          -// "But Cursor is the future"
        
          +/* GitHub's already in your future.
        
          + * Copilot shipped in 2021.
        
          + * GitHub's been iterating while others were incorporating.
        
          + * First-mover advantage isn't a myth. */

          -// "But my favorite YouTuber uses Cursor"
        
          +/* Your favorite YouTuber also has a Squarespace promo code.
        
          + * Enterprise decisions aren't made in 10-minute coding tutorials.
        
          + * Call us when the adults are in the room. */

          -// "But Copilot costs money"
        
          +/* GitHub has a free tier now, genius.
        
          + * 2,000 completions. 50 chat requests. $0. Forever.
        
          + * Want Pro? 30-day free trial. No credit card.
        
          + * Students, teachers, OSS maintainers? Free Pro forever.
        
          + * Your excuse just expired. */

README.md

What the fuck is Copilot?

No, not that one. This one.

It's the AI pair programmer that 26 million developers are already using.
It's not a VSCode fork—it's a platform that works everywhere you code.

While you're debugging why Cursor crashed after an update,
Copilot is busy powering code completion for 46% of all new code on GitHub.

Yeah. That's a real stat. Look it up.

The numbers don't lie

Metric	Copilot	That Other One
Organizations	77,000+	They don't say 🤔
Developers	26 million	"Growing fast"
Code written with AI	46% of GitHub	Trust us bro
IDE support	9+ platforms	1 (it's just VSCode)
Free tier	✅ 2,000 completions/mo	✅ Limited
SOC 2 Type II	✅	¯\_(ツ)_/¯
IP Indemnity	✅ Microsoft-backed	Good luck in court
Parent company market cap	$3.6T (12/22/25)	Series B
Your company already pays for it	Probably	Check your expense reports

features.json

⊕ Coding Agent

Writes code for you.

Assign issues directly to Copilot. It autonomously writes code, creates PRs, and responds to feedback. In the background. While you're in meetings.

↯ Agent Mode

Your AI colleague.

Copilot in your editor does it all—explaining concepts, completing code, proposing edits, validating files. It's not autocomplete. It's a colleague.

▸ CLI

Terminal superpowers.

Direct Copilot in the terminal using natural language. Watch it plan, build, and execute complex workflows. gh copilot > memorizing flags.

◎ Code Review

Finds the bugs.

AI-powered PR reviews. Finds bugs, suggests improvements, explains changes. Finally, someone who actually reads your PRs before approving.

◈ Spaces

Shared context.

Create shared context from your docs and repos. Scale knowledge across teams. Your org's tribal knowledge, actually documented.

⊞ MCP

Connects everything.

Connect databases, APIs, tools via MCP servers. Sentry, DataDog, Docker, and more. Your AI that actually knows your stack.

◐ Models

Pick your favorite.

GPT-4.1, GPT-5, Claude Sonnet 4.5, Claude Opus 4.5, Gemini 2.5 Pro. Copilot is not locked to one provider's bad week.

⊡ Multi-IDE

Works everywhere.

VSCode, Visual Studio, JetBrains, Neovim, Xcode, Eclipse, Azure Data Studio, Raycast. Copilot meets developers where they are.

◆ Enterprise

CISO-approved.

IP indemnity, SOC 2, audit logs, SAML SSO, content exclusions. The boring stuff that lets legal sleep at night.

$ stop paying for another subscription your company already covers

$ stop using a startup's VSCode fork when you have the real thing

$ stop explaining to compliance why you're sending code to a Series B

✓ Solution: just fucking use Copilot

Get Copilot

Your IT department already approved it.