The ants are back...
(and other inevitable things that surprise me)
Our 23 year old started her post-college job a year ago and though she’s worked every summer for years, this is the first time in her life that there’s no official transition into summer. No end of classes, no break between school and work, no change of schedule.
There are a lot of things that take us by surprise in adulthood, aren’t there? Not just the big life transitions, but even the mundane changes in our daily ebb and flow. Shifts in cadence, small changes in our habits and interests.
I’d have thought that the further I get into this adulthood gig, the less I’d be caught off guard by who I’ve become. Alas, there are things that have snuck up on me. Like, being excited about a jigsaw puzzle mat. Or experiencing the thrill of finding a good hat for every season.
Maybe if my daughter knows that someday, when she’s fifty, she too will be mystified by the magic of prescription sunglasses or find herself telling her family about a squirrel stealing a whole peach(!) from a neighbor’s tree, her Summer of 2025 starting without fanfare won’t seem so bad after all. So, I thought I’d offer her an incomplete list of things that have surprised me about being a person of a certain age lately.
Here it is, sweetheart (don’t say I didn’t warn you):
You fall in love with ordinary things. Not in a Mary Oliver kind of way (though that happens too). Think more utilitarian. For instance, you’ll become obsessed with a local supermarket where there’s good parking, good coffee, and good music. You’ll say things to your husband like, “The butcher didn’t even roll his eyes at me when I asked him to spatchcock the chickens!” And you won’t see anything strange about that.
Aging is more time consuming than you’d expect. (I blame your generation for the rise of influencers, and those influencers have now found a profitable market in
women my ageme.) You will start paying attention to things like protein, fiber, and collagen. You might even take a foray into creatine. You will spend a lot of time mixing powders into water and drinking these potions; also, your kitchen counter will look like a scene from Scarface.Every season, you will develop an enemy of Bill-Murray-in-Caddyshack-level proportions. For me, every spring, it’s the ants. But sometimes, life surprises you and throws an aggressive deer your way. The deer will stalk you as you walk through the neighborhood, then taunt you as it eats your hostas while looking you dead in the eyes. The dog will be no help.
If/when you become a parent, there are a lot of dead fish. I don’t know how to explain this one. Just trust me.
A new household tool will delight you. Right now, for me, it’s a clothing steamer. (When I told your brother that I received our iron as a bridal shower gift about 26 years ago, he joked, “What, they think, ‘You’re getting married, so you’re gonna need an iron?’” Umm, yes. But I digress.)
My point on this one isn’t actually about the steamer. It’s that, someday, you may show your partner your new purchase, and he’ll share your delight. You’ll find yourselves in the bathroom–he holding the clothes while you steam–amazed as the wrinkles release from the fabric. And, these moments of working together, of collective and ridiculous joy over small things? That’s the biggest surprise of all. That’s where the magic is at.
Acorns for the week:
(aka joys I hope take root)
I love this poem by Maggie Smith about the simplicity of sharing the ordinary:
Here’s a link to it as well: https://blueflowerarts.com/illuminations/poem-beginning-with-a-retweet/
Start with a list! Often in my writing classes, we’ll use a list as a way into writing. This week, I invite you to try…write a list of things that have surprised you at this stage in your life. Share one in the comments!



So true about loving the small things and pausing realize how much you love them—a gift from the wisdom years
Once again you nailed it. 💘