Joe

jbear70 @ 2010-11-14T17:57:00

2010-11-14T23:58:17Z

This afternoon I put David on the train back to Michigan. Knowing how confusing Union Station is and knowing we were rushed for time I took him inside and I waited with him in line. We said our goodbyes just after the ticket checker verified his ticket and sent him on to the platform. Thinking over the weekend, I'm glad he was able to come visit, though I feel like I hardly did enough with him. He spent Friday afternoon at the Chicago Art Institute and didn't see the whole place. Of course we all asked if he had seen the new modern wing and he said no, he's not into Modern Art. This is kind of indicative of his personality. He's always been more of a traditionalist. He then came back to my office while I wrapped things up and then we were off to the Metra for the quick twenty minute ride home. After walking from the Rogers Park station to the condo he met Penny for the first time. She was a little stand-off-ish at first but she let him pet her. Bailey just loved the attention he got from him. We ended up ordering food from Panino's and watching Tim Burton's Alice In Wonderland on Netflicks.

Saturday Bob aries470 got donuts to wake us up. Once we got moving, we went to the Icon Theaters in the South for a showing of "Unstoppable", probably not the best film considering David had arrived by train but he enjoyed the film none-the-less. After the film we met up with Andrew at Uncle Julio's for lunch where we spent and inordinate amount of time chit-chatting and catching up. David then went off with Andrew while Bob and I went back home to get ready for our plans that evening. We had purchased tickets for the Peruvian film "Contrcorriente" ("Undertow") at the Chicago GLBT Reeling Film Festival. I was particularly interested in it since I am Peruvian. It is a film about two men in a close-knit Peruvian fishing village who have a gay relationship. One of them has a pregnant wife and when his lover passes away must come to terms with his relationship with him and what it really meant. It was a powerful film, something you just don't see much of in mainstream filmaking. I'm glad I saw it. After the movie we met up with my brothers, Mikie mikiedoggie and a friend of his who was visiting from San Francisco at Fado Irish Pub in River North. The music was loud but we did manage to find a quieter corner of the place and have some good conversation.

Sunday we slept in. I took David to the train and came home for lunch. Now I'm back downtown at the office trying to get things ready for my deadline that was pushed back from last Friday. Hopefully Monday will be the last day I need to worry about this project for while at least. Regardless, it was good to see my brother again. I am glad he decided to come into town.

jbear70 @ 2010-11-12T08:03:00

2010-11-12T14:03:40Z

My brother David arrives today in Chicago. I'm really looking forward to his visit. First of all because he hardly ever leaves his hometown, Lansing, MI, and second because I like spending time with my siblings. I don't do it enough and one of them lives in the same city as I do!

David is arriving on Amtrak, another first at least for him, around noon today. Unfortunately I won't be able to break away from work because of deadlines and the fact that he didn't commit to the trip until the last minute (typical for David) but I may take him out for lunch and send him on his way to a museum until I get off. He's interested in checking out the Chicago Art Institute and Millenium Park. Hopefully it won't be too cold today for the park. Tomorrow we're probably going to see a movie in the morning and play it by ear afterward. Bob and I have an engagement in the evening so David may hangout with my other brother, Andrew, for a while. On Sunday he heads back.

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jbear70 @ 2010-11-10T07:48:00

2010-11-10T13:49:28Z

The Thanksgiving venue has been nailed down. My brother Andrew's house will be the site and my father and his girlfriend will come in from Kalamazoo. They may stay the night but are as of yet undecided. Bob thinks my family is weird because no one talks. Maybe that's true but when we finally do talk things get decided, mostly out of frustration.

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jbear70 @ 2010-11-10T07:48:00

2010-11-10T13:49:28Z

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Coatesville Trip

2010-11-09T14:17:15Z

Well Bob and I agreed on a date and made the reservations. We're heading to Coatesville, Pennsylvania the second weekend in December to visit my aunt, grandma and of course my mother. I seem
To do this every year. I get a little unglued in October and miss my mother dearly and then pick one of the coldest times of the year to visit her grave. That's not good for my mental health. I should see her grave in the summer too when the weather is nice and the landscape is lush and full. Of course I will also be visiting my grandma and aunt but it'll just be a quick in and out one weekend visit, barely enough time to hang my hat so to speak. Still, I'm glad that I'm going. I'm always happy to see my relatives. They aren't going to be around much longer and I feel that I should cherish the moments I can spend with them.

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jbear70 @ 2010-11-08T10:46:00

2010-11-08T16:47:09Z

It was good to get in an extra hour of sleep but this morning my ass is dragging from staying up late last night. I should never do that on a school night. Sunday started with walking the dogs and then cleaning house in preparation for having Bob’s aries470 sister, Kelly, and nephew, Ryan, over later for a pasta dinner. My stuff had spread out over the dining room table and it was time to rein it in. After cleaning up I took a shower and then headed out to indoor volleyball practice. The church gymnasium was tiny and old but Rocky-esque in a way. We had a good practice and afterward Kelly, Ryan and I went back to my place for the long awaited pasta dinner.

The food was great and the dogs loved the company as always. We watched TV for a while and after Kelly and Ryan left Bob took a disco nap while I watched a little a football. Later I got Bob up by annoying him awake and we got ready to head out to see the film “Violet Tendencies” a movie with Mindy Cohn who played Natalie on the Facts of Life, a favorite show of Bob’s and mine when we were younger. We got down to the Landmark Century Cinema in plenty of time and hung out at Borders across the street for a bit. Once in the theater we scoped out our seats so we could leave easily and not have to stay for the Q&A with the director (normally I would but it was a 9:15PM show on a “school” night). The movie was good and very enjoyable. It had a coherent plot and the characters were believable. Bob and I enjoyed it very much. We left and got home by 11:30 at which time Bob went to bed while I took care of some condo business before calling it a night.

jbear70 @ 2010-11-06T18:20:00

2010-11-06T23:20:35Z

Bob (aries470 ) and I met up with Bob's cousin Becky and his two sisters Kelly and Tricia. Becky was visiting Chicago on a whirlwind trip through the States. She's from Chicago originally but has been in Rome since June working for a university in marketing to set up semesters abroad programs. It was good seeing her again and talking about her experiences in Rome, the city of fountains and cats. Bob and I are actually planning a trip to Rome in April so it was good to pick her brain about areas of the city to stay and visit.

jbear70 @ 2010-11-01T18:41:00

2010-11-01T23:41:24Z

October is over. Whew! The huge pink flag that hung in the main entry of Ogilvie Transportation Center is gone. The spires of Hancock Center and the Willis Tower are back to their traditional white color. And all negative reminders of my mother are slowly fading away. This time of year is always a little tough for me not because I miss my mom, I always miss her, but because I’m reminded of how she died. I know I’m supposed to celebrate her life and not grieve in her loss. But it’s hard when I know that it was the breast cancer that went untreated for so long because the quack doctors she was seeing couldn’t read a mammogram from a hole in the wall. I accept however that no one really is to blame. I know that it was her time to go, though I wish it wasn’t. It’s usually after this time of year that I start missing her really bad. Maybe it’s because of the holidays. Maybe it’s because of the huge pink flag, and the pink caps on my medicine vials, and all the awareness races, and pink ribbons people wear. People tell me that I should put my efforts into making people aware of breast cancer in her memory, but in my mind I think maybe if she never had breast cancer she’d still be her. Instead I get to stand on a cold, windswept hillside in Pennsylvania and stare at a stone for a few minutes wishing things had worked out differently.

jbear70 @ 2010-10-11T13:24:00

2010-10-11T18:25:23Z

This weekend my partner Bob (aries470 ) and I were recuperating from switching mattresses. My previous mattress was getting old and I knew Bob's back occasionally goes out. I knew that while it may not be directly related to the mattress, I knew it could be indirectly related. We had seen the commercials for TemperPedic and always wondered what they would be like so we went to a local mattress store and tried out a few models. We settled on one that was firm but not too firm, soft but not too soft. It was delivered on Thursday and we tried it out Friday night. It feels somewhat like sleeping on a firm, study sponge. So far I like it and I think he does too.

Other weekend shenanigans included getting the dogs groomed, getting myself groomed, grocery shopping, helping Bob with his homework, going to the office for a bit, and watching a little TV. We're planning a trip to Italy for April of next year so we did some online planning for that. I just wish we could find a reputable travel agent to deal with who can help us plan out the vacation. There's so much we want to do in Rome, Florence, and Volterra (a picturesque hill town that holds sentimental value for me) that we want to avoid tourist lines, long waits for trains, and get the best advice for getting around (i.e. car rental vs. trains). Basically we need help from someone who knows the ropes and won't steal our money.

jbear70 @ 2010-10-03T19:42:00

2010-10-04T00:42:24Z

Last weekend my partner, aries470, and I went to Detroit for a quick weekend trip to attend a reception for my alma mater and photograph a building that I completed as project architect. I had not seen the finished building so it wanted to see how it turned out as well as get photographs for my portfolio. We left the dogs with Bob's sister and fought through Chicago traffic to arrive in Detroit late Friday night. We stayed at the Southfield Marriott right next to where I used to work at Harley Ellis Devereaux. We got a great deal on the rooms and it was central to where we needed to be. The one thing I regret on this trip was not getting together with my friends who live in the Detroit area but between photographing the building in Sterling Heights Saturday morning, the suit and tie reception at the Detroit Yacht Club Saturday evening and leaving early Sunday morning to photograph another building in Kalamazoo, Bob and I didn't have much time to spare in the Motor City. There will be a next time, I promise.
The reception at the yacht club in Detroit was to help fund a residential college for the students of University of Detroit Mercy the School of Architecture. This residential college would augment the program that is already in place but suffers from a funding problem due mostly to the recent devaluation of the Dollar to the Euro. The college was approaching the alumni to help with this effort to renovate a building the town of Volterra, Italy (left) had donated to the college for thirty years. It's a worthy cause that I hope to contribute to.

The Beaumont Physicians Office Building (right) was built a few years ago when I was with Harley Ellis Devereaux . I was the project architect on this five story building containing doctors offices, a pharmacy, a optometrist office, and a cancer center. It is connected to the main hospital by a bridge crossing over Dequindre Road. Originally a canopy was supposed to extend off the north face but this was changed at the last minute by the developers of the building. Because they had such phenomenal success leasing space in the building, the developers wanted to have the ability to expand the building to the north. This rather ugly tan wall on the first floor can be torn down and the building expanded.

On the way back to Chicago we stopped for a while in Kalamazoo to photograph the Western Michigan University College of Engineering. I was the project architect on this building constructed on the outskirts of Kalamazoo in a new educational/business/technology park. The purpose of the park was to meld an educational institution with the business and technology that the students would eventually be a part of. I worked with Rosetti Architects in Birmingham, MI as the design architect. This project involved coordination with parking deck consultants, paper technology equipment consultants, laboratory equipment consultants, precase concrete panel consultants, door hardware consultants, and extensive civil engineering.

jbear70 @ 2010-09-22T08:37:00

2010-09-22T13:41:01Z

My youngest brother, Andrew, is participating in a walk this weekend for suicide prevention, a cause that is near and dear to him after a close friend who killed himself after suffering from bipolar disorder two and a half years ago. In celebration of his life and in an attempt to raise awareness of the toll suicide and mental illness takes on so many families, Andrew is walking and raising funds. If you would like to help support him check out the link below to his fundraising page. Thank you.

http://afsp.donordrive.com/index.cfm?fuseaction=donorDrive.participant&eventID=1043&participantID=114122

jbear70 @ 2010-09-20T13:26:00

2010-09-20T18:29:48Z

Since October 2009, when I last posted, a lot has changed. Fall, Winter, Spring and Summer have come and gone, and now I'm setting in a new desk and a new architectural firm. Luckily this firm doesn't block websites - yay! So accessing Live Journal, Facebook, Gmail and all the other fun sites is easier. I just have to make sure I get my work done and meet my deadlines.

So yes, I'm at a new firm. It's a much smaller firm (I'm the 8th person in the office) compared to my previous company (a large national architectural engineering firm). Luckily I'm still practing healthcare architecture and I'm still learning new things every day. It was a little tricky understanding how this office and the two managing partners operate but I think I'm settling in. I see potential here both for me and this firm even if the printers and copiers aren't as fancy as they were at the old place.

Bob and I took a trip to London and Paris during this period. The flight over was leisurely although we almost didn't go because of a British Airways labor union strike. Everything worked out for the better and we arrived in London, in the cold rain in December. We stayed at a hotel off Grosvenor Square near the American Embassy and woke up early every morning to site see. Although we tried multiple times we never saw the changing of the guard we never saw it. It was always cancelled at the last minute. Never the less, we still had fun and even saw a show, Priscilla Queen of the Desert on stage in teeny-tiny seats meant for dwarfs. We headed over to Paris on the Eurostar one day and saw Notre Dame, Sainte Chapelle, and the Eiffel Tower. We walked down the Champps Ellysee (forgive my spelling) and enjoyed twilight watching all the pretty Christmas lights. We returned to London and enjoyed New Years Eve on a bridge over the Thames with millions of Londoners and on another night had a champagne flight on the London Eye. The flight back was on my birthday and the cabin steward gave us extra wine and champagne.

Bob and I really like going to out with friends. Here we are at a Minnesota Twins game this past summer. Steve and Erich were with us but not pictured. We often travel up to the Twin Cities for extended weekends to get away from Chicago for a while. It's always good to visit friends in places near and far. Now that I'm working again hopefully we can travel a little more. In April we're planning a NYC trip and for Bob's graduation we're planning a much bigger trip to Australia.

Condo Business

2009-10-24T16:39:04Z

It's been cold and rainy outside, typical I suppose for Chicago in fall. I'm at the office working, not so typical these days. I'm feeling distracted so I thought I would write a post to accentuate that.

One thing that has been going on for a while in my life is I decided to join the condinium association board. I thought it would be fun and in some ways it has been. In other ways it hasn't. I've always been the type of person to work behind the scenes to make sure things are organized for those who need to make decisions. I do this in the workplace and to a large degree I try to do it at home. Those on the condo board, including me, were all new to running a condo board. And some of us are a little more hot tempered than others. I tried to provide some organization to the madness by instilling paperwork standards based on my own company's standards. It was pretty successful. Where I think I failed was in putting too much authority in the president, who was one of the hot-heads. At first he wanted everything done right away and when the Board members couldn't do it he did it. This caused a lot of angst on all sides. We eventually settled into a rythmn but I can't help but feel like he must feel like we gave him authority and then took it away.

Now we are dealing with getting money from the developer for unfinished items in the building. The problem is the developer is the father of the builder and the builder is one of the directors of company the father runs that developed our building and still owns four units in it. Thanks to the real estate bubble going bust we still have unsold units.

To top everything off we have a major issue between one hot-head resident and the hot-head president over noise issues that could end up in court. The board initially tried to accommodate both sides but the matter quickly degenerated to the point of no return and no their party is happy with each other.

Isn't serving on a condo board fun!

It's hard to say what's going to happen next. Everything it seems is uncharted territory. But it's been an experience to write about that's for sure.

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It's been a while

2009-10-22T20:39:12Z

It's been a while since my last post. I've been off in Facebook land and caught up in other things. So much has happened since back then. The highlights are I've been elected Secretary of my condo board, been to New York City for a relaxing yet fun filled Fourth of July, planned a trip to England and Paris for this coming New Years, been irradiated, played on a softball team with a group of great guys and spent time with my sweetie (always worth mentioning.) I plan on writing more so hopefully I won't have to think of everything I've done for the past year.

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Test

2009-10-22T11:46:25Z

Testing LJ App.

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jbear70 @ 2009-02-26T18:12:00

2009-02-27T00:27:55Z

Yesterday was Ash Wednesday. It kinda snuck up on me. All of a sudden it was Mardi Gras and Paczki Day and then I had to run down to Assumption Church a few blocks from my office to get blessed with ashes on my forehead. In the past I've always attended a service in conjunction with being blessed. This time I did a "drive-by" whereas I walked into the church multi-purpose room (not the sanctuary) where I got in a short line of people, a priest blessed my forehead with ashes and I said "Amen." This abbreviated procedure was a first for me and although it made the whole process speedy I couldn't help but feel like it cheepened the whole experience. An "A" for effort and a "F" on follow thru I thought. There's always next year I suppose.

jbear70 @ 2009-01-29T23:45:00

2009-01-30T05:49:28Z

I finally took the plunge last weekend and created a Facebook page. I had a been semi-resisting it for a while but deep down I knew I would likely create it. I've been doing less and less Live Journal posting for a number of reasons and Facebook just seemed like a better fit. I'll still keep my LJ account. I'm not done journalling by any means. I just wanted another outlet. So far it seems like a fun, user friendly system. We'll see how it goes.

jbear70 @ 2008-12-28T22:25:00

2008-12-29T04:27:00Z

Happy Birthday Erich bookish_cub !!!

jbear70 @ 2008-12-02T22:29:00

2008-12-03T05:06:29Z

It's been a while since I last posted. A lot has been happening, mostly work unfortunately. Thankfully though things finally came to a head and my calls for help were heeded and unfortunately mistakes were made. Long story there but let's just say that there was plenty of blame to spread around up and down the corporate ladder but I am the only one who actually apologized. The good that came about was that I got the help I needed and the Gordion Knot that my life seemed to become unwinded to the point that now I can feel my stress levels remarkably lower. I feel like now I can spend more time on the projects I have with the reduced workload. I also feel like I can take time off without my projects coming to a crashing halt. Things these days are better.

jbear70 @ 2008-09-20T18:41:00

2008-09-20T23:42:22Z

GO CUBS GO!!!

jbear70 @ 2008-08-31T09:17:00

2008-08-31T14:23:53Z

As much as I like to do what I do every day, it's good to get away. Bob and I are currently in Branson, MO visiting his dad. Bob's sister, nephew and cousin joined us for the car ride down which was at times exciting and boring -- but enough about the trip. I'm finding the long holiday weekend to be relaxing. I'm able to recharge and I'm not thinking about work as much as I thought I would be. Yesterday we went on a ride in a "duck" from the Branson Strip up to the dam and the big lake behind it. We spent the morning being tourists and the afternoon being shoppers at the outlet center. I replenished my Big Dogs wardrobe with about $120 in T-shirts. Today the plan is to chill out at breakfast and then do things on our own before attending a birthday party for a relative of Bob's. Tomorrow we head back to Chicago. I'm taking Tuesday off from work too for some additional relaxation.

jbear70 @ 2008-08-06T22:30:00

2008-08-07T03:42:56Z

After a long workday I made it home in time to run up to Skokie to pick up my new suit from the Mens Warehouse. I needed the suit for a couple reasons but most importantly for my 20th Year Class Reunion on Saturday. As it turns out the reunion party is "business casual". I guess it pays to read the invite but oh well. I needed a suit anyway.

I saw my neurologist last week and we agreed to wean me off of one of my anti-siezure drugs. The drug we're getting rid of is the Keppra which is a relatively new drug for me. It was added when I had those two seizures back in February. One of the side effects of the drug is that it makes me irritable. I'm generally not irritable but with the medication when something sets me off I really get upset. It frightens me. Beginning August 1st I cut back to 750mg per day from 1000mg. September 1st I'll cut back to 500mg and October 1st I'll cut back again to 250mg. Hopefully by the end of September I'll be off the drug and only using Tegretol XR which I've tolerated well since 1991.

jbear70 @ 2008-07-25T06:56:00

2008-07-25T12:02:39Z

It's been a little while since I last posted. I got a call from my dad yesterday. I knew he had a follow-up appointment with his surgeon at the Mayo Clinic. He relayed to me that his PSA was zero. We couldn't have hoped for better news. He was in good spirits and so was I. He's going to stay in Eden Prairie, MN, where is non-girlfriend/girlfriend lives through the weekend and then sometime head back to Kalamazoo next week. He asked if I had finished the house addition drawings I had promised. When I told him I hadn't I could sense his disappointment. Maybe today on my lunch hour I'll start them. I've been just too busy but that's no excuse.

This weekend Bob and I are planning to go to two Cubs games. His sisters bought tickets for Saturday and invited us. Sunday we bought passes for a rooftop with all the other gays for the Out At The Ballgame Event. We went to this event last year and had a blast. It's all you can eat food, beer, pop, chips, popcorn and pizza for the price of entry. You can't beat that! I just hope the Cubs win.

jbear70 @ 2008-07-09T22:58:00

2008-07-10T04:06:31Z

My dad called me last night to let me know his girlfriend would not be going to Kalamazoo with him next week. Consequently he won't be coming to Chicago the following weekend with her. Whether he meets her in Rochester for his check up with his prostate surgeon I didn't ask. He seemed a little anxious. He also wanted me to get going on helping him with the home remodel drawings I had promised. After I hung up I told Bob about what dad had said. Bob wasn't surprised and honestly I wasn't either. The woman is a flake and I feel bad for my dad having to go through this. Part of me says he should experience it but the other part of me fears he'll keep coming back to her because he doesn't know who else to turn to. I wish he would find the inner strength to become happy with who he is as a person before going out on the dating scene again. Perhaps this home remodel is part of that. I hope so.

jbear70 @ 2008-07-03T20:56:00

2008-07-04T02:15:50Z

Today didn't go as planned. Life intervened. Bob woke me up this morning in excruciating pain. It was so bad he couldn't walk from our bed to the bathroom just across the hall. After taking the dog for a quick walk around the block at 5:00 AM, I called a private ambulance company to take Bob to Evanston Northwestern Hospital. I followed in the Escape. We spent about 3 hours plus in the ER where they gave Bob a muscle relaxer and pain killer. After about an hour they had him walk around the ER and he was obviously doing better. By lunchtime we were out of there and making our way to White Castle to fill our grumbling stomachs.

Bob napped off and on for much of the day. Right now he's sore but the pain isn't nearly like it was this morning. I called in to work and told them I was not going to be able to come in and why. The work-aholic in my says I may go in on Sunday to try to make up in part for today but who knows for sure. I may just decide to say screw it, some things are more important.