Meesa

friends only

jakepstein — Fri, 12 Feb 2010 17:23:19 GMT

comment to be added.

jakepstein — Tue, 05 Jan 2010 23:33:13 GMT

ALL THE STARS POINT ME TO YOU AND LATELY THEY JUST DRIVE ME CRAZY!

Don't trust a ho.

jakepstein — Thu, 02 Apr 2009 15:55:17 GMT

Tell your boyfriend, if he says he's got beef, that I'm a vegetarian, and I ain't fucking scared of him.

Entries from the ZOMG plane.

jakepstein — Thu, 15 Jan 2009 16:51:38 GMT

Happy 20th Birthday, ADELA

Ok so usually, I would take a photo and draw a really cheap looking birthday hat and balloons or something on it but photoshop got deleted off my computer. Instead, let's try something different.

THIS IS A STORY... [it's not very long]...

This is Rosa Adela Rivadeneira:

[I hit the jackpot, right?]

we met, not by chance, but by the will of G-d when she dated my very, very good/ amazing friend/ life partner/ Husband Nicolas Bedo.

[[ seen here:

(lucky me, huh?) ]]

I'm the nosy best friend, looking out for my best guy friend since 10th grade, and I sort of weaseled my way into her life to make sure she met my standards when it came to Nick. I'm protective, what can I say. Strangely enough, she and I ended up being able to keep a conversation going with more than just a "Hi, how are you? k thx bye" type deal.

anyway, it's even more remarkable that after their relationship ended, I found the most amazing friend in this girl, who is now a woman; a beautiful, talented, astounding woman who has been through so much and has come out so strong.

it's weird how the most random events can create the biggest impact in your life. Had it not been for Nick winning her over with his charm and charisma ;], we would have never ended up like this:

She is there for me every day of my life. She is one of my very first thoughts when I wake up and usually the very last voice I hear every night. She understands my pains and my hardships and she cradles me with her words and insight. No matter what happens, she has my back 100% of the time, even if she doesn't agree 100% with what I'm thinking or doing.

She wipes my tears. She causes my smiles. She is the reasons most nights I can say "I'll be okay." Her support, her love, her friendship means everything to me and it has helped me overcome so many obstacles and believe so much in a future; in a life I never believed once existed.

It's cheesy, you know, but she's the little voice of my subconscious, warning me when something just isn't right, the backspace on my keyboard when I'm working on my book and think twice about the way I'm wording something, really, she's the beat in my heart, the faint drumming background to my piano "solo": maybe not always physically there, live and in color, but always some place that's not far from my reach.

I can count on her. And I know without a single doubt in my mind that she loves me unconditionally. And that if I needed anything from her, anything at all, she would give absolutely everything she had to give me that thing, whatever it may be, just to make me happy.

I'm not sure how many people have even read this far down, except for you, my Adela. And though I can't be there right beside you today, making this the greatest birthday to date, you know that March is approaching fast and I will make it up to you.

I feel selfish because today you should be the one receiving all the gifts and feeling like a queen, but that's exactly how I feel. I feel like I have received one of the most amazing gifts of all: you. And with that simplistic thought, I feel like I'm on top of the world.

I love you more than I'll ever be able to express with any words or any type of action. You mean so much to me. I love you, times infinity. I can't imagine my life without you in it. Who would sing Weezy to me on the phone at 2am? Who would keep me safe through "dead time", watching Direct TV with me on the other end of the phone line? Who would I cry to when I felt like I just couldn't take it anymore? What would I have? I don't know, nor do I ever plan to find out.

Now here, hold my baby.

forever and ever, amen.

zomg plane.

Waiting.

jakepstein — Sat, 10 Jan 2009 22:40:33 GMT

What a glorious world I live in.

lmao. come on, you have to agree.

Dollar sign brass knuckles, gangster duck slippers, hoods up, dancing crazy to "Got Money".

Danielle is my sanity here. Or together we're insanity.
It's whatever.

I'll have something more interesting soon.
[if that's even possible]

jakepstein — Tue, 16 Dec 2008 20:45:44 GMT

I put tons and tons of my entries on private.
I need a huge change; I need a fresh start.

Beautiful Rescue.

jakepstein — Mon, 06 Oct 2008 07:13:42 GMT

I need to take a minute and tell the world that I love my friends.

G-d sent me to Texas to meet Danielle. She completes my life.
Michele is everything to me and has been for ten years.
Adela is always there to pick me up every time I fall.
And Kara is joining my life once more.

My girlfriends are my life

G-d, you have truly blessed me.
Thank you for everything.

Always grateful,
Anne.

Intense.

jakepstein — Mon, 21 Jul 2008 08:14:59 GMT

Seriously, Adela and I are soooo pulling a Lindsay Lohan/Samantha Ronson.

we're "going there".

jakepstein — Thu, 24 Apr 2008 07:12:50 GMT

Lately,
I've got a problem with the way that you behave
you're too much. and all your questions don't leave me no time for me.

all your opinions, keep them to yourself. just let me think so I can hear myself.
wouldn't it be nice if I could just go solo, take the day off? I'd be alright if you would leave me to it, back the fuck off.
you're talking way too much.
you tell me one more time how I should live, I swear I'll bite your head off.
I am who I am and I can't be no one else
you got nothing left to say; keep your comments to yourself.

Don't Dream It's Over.

jakepstein — Fri, 18 Apr 2008 16:17:42 GMT

Welcome Pesach break.

au revoir knee socks and long skirts!!

what's up hair extensions, make up and LEGGINGS. zomaw!

You wouldn't think I'd be so happy about the above but I mean, it's like coming out off of a 3 month stint, or the set of a movie where you've worked the last 3 months and had taken on the roll of this character who was so far out of your own personal jurisdiction.

I've been so far from myself, getting back to normal for the next week is going to to feel very strange, for I think half of me is slowly forgetting; as my days away are spent so tiresome from such an act that I've either lost the will to try or have seriously simply just forgotten how I usually am.

this is all a bit random and making no sense.

I just finished Holocaust Survivor and I am so pumped up right now. I want to head to the Museum in Dallas right now and hear this man speak [Mendel Jakubowicz]. I just called my Mom up to see if she would attend with me but I can't reach her. she must be at work with the rest of the normal nation.

At the end of this, the only thing I really mean to say is I've got a lot of time that I'm unsure what to do with. I feel empty inside, but so full, I can't find the words to explain. I have no respect towards those I don't know and random people ruin things, they make me lose whatever small faith I had left in the unknown hands of mankind. [which wasn't very much, trust me]

I miss Kristy, for during these hours as of late she has seriously just been the only person here that I can honestly and truthfully call a friend and she has helped me see so much of life, in such a different light. it honestly almost makes me feel sick deep in my stomach to realize there has been so much of the world I have seen, but never really looked at. and how the hell did I ever attempt to embrace these specific aspects of living without her in my life? It doesn't make sense.

far too difficult to be anything anyone would understand, I suppose. and if you've read thus far well then, félicitations, a little more intelligence exists here than I previously suspected.

Take On Me.

jakepstein — Tue, 15 Apr 2008 18:50:10 GMT

work is kind of slow. I have a bunch of paper work I need to take care of but I definitely have to wait until after 4:30pm carpool because I need this place to be a child-free environment before I can get any work done.

I feel like such a pushover at work because I can't be mean to these children and they completely walk all over me and try to get whatever they can out of me because they believe they're going to get away with it. Like six of them just came into the office and I said "what's wrong" and they all just started screaming over one another at the top of their lungs and I began, like usual, to have this slight panic attack and I pushed my chair from my computer and put my hands to my head and said "stop". hearing that, the Rabbi came running out of his office, shouting [the first time I'm ever heard him] telling all of them to get out and leave me alone and to go fight outside, blah blah blah.

I feel like such a sissy.

It's not the first time this has happened. It sent me into the worst anxiety attack last Monday and I went running into his office, shut the door, leaned against the wall and slowly fell to the floor like a wuss. and all I could say was "I'm sorry to be such a push over; these girls, they refuse to listen to me." and he went flying out of his office and into the nurses office where about six of them were stationed, closed the door and put them in their place, whatever.

doesn't mean they stop this act. I'm frustrated. so, whatever, I'll be staying in the office till seven, I hope. this whole Pesach thing is really going to kick my ass.

Dressed In Black.

jakepstein — Wed, 24 Oct 2007 20:37:59 GMT

holding on to patience, wearing thin.
I can't force these eyes to see the end.
if only time flew like a dove,
we could watch it fly and just keep looking up.

this time we're not giving up.
let's make it last forever.
screaming; h a l l e l u j a h.
we'll make it last forever.

[[[zomg BFF's]]

Message In A Bottle.

jakepstein — Sun, 21 Oct 2007 07:24:41 GMT

I am not a bad person. And I don't say that because I have a mouth full of myself, I say it because I have enough respect for myself to realize that I am not a piece of shit. So where you get off trying to tell me that I am completely baffles me.

For what it's worth, you disgust me. And I'm sure it's not worth much. But neither are you so we're even, I suppose.

jakepstein — Sun, 30 Sep 2007 02:58:18 GMT

Jessica's covered in a blanket on a sunday porch,
thinking on weekends she would party in the city.
she doesn't have a flame. she'd prefer to burn out like a torch
if she gets nowhere in life, at least she knows she's pretty.

what does it take to be a super hero in my world?
make no mistake that these villains always get the girl.
we can escape and then we'd skate away from all of this...
but no one ever does.

Under Pressure.

jakepstein — Sat, 24 Mar 2007 01:31:11 GMT

My closest guy friend said the most amazing thing to me when we were at dinner a week back. Four of us were gathered around a table, reminiscing and simply enjoying each other's company. It was good to be surrounded by the people who mean most to me. He took a good look at me and smiled. "it's good to see you," he said. My heart felt warm. He followed with something along the lines of this: "My psychology professor was talking the other day about these specific special people in your life and how you can go months without seeing each other and when you're back in one another's presence, it's like you were never apart. I smiled and thought 'I have a friend just like that.'" It was the most heartfelt thing I had heard in a while. It was one of those things that makes your heart drop and you stop and think "damn, I'm pretty lucky."

When you lose specific people in your life, it can hit you pretty hard. But in the end, when you think about it, the people who stay by your side are the ones who are worth every single breath you take.

California for Spring Break.

jakepstein — Wed, 07 Mar 2007 20:33:17 GMT

Jen & I are in Southern, Cali till Tuesday bby's.

stay chillll.

Wannabe.

jakepstein — Mon, 05 Feb 2007 20:07:25 GMT

Overall, I had a great day yesterday. I was completely dreading having to wake up early on a Sunday morning to go down past Deep Ellum to a Museum for Art History class. but, it wasn't half bad driving all the way down there with Sami. Parking was horrific, but free, so who can complain? We walked a few streets over to the Dallas Museum of Art. I have been to a few Art Museums before, but this one was just beautiful and astounding. there were so many amazing paintings with such amazing texture and brush strokes. the colors some specific artists used just made the entire thing jump out at you.

Today, however, is just a little bit stressful. I have my second exam of the semester at 5:30, and though I've reviewed my homework and read through the chapters a few times now, I still feel unprepared. I've rewritten my english narrative/descriptive essay four or five times now. I just can't seem to please myself with my words anymore. They just don't make sense. Or maybe I'm just spending a bit too much time stressing about it. Nevertheless, I'm sure I'll get everything together shortly.

When in doubt.

jakepstein — Thu, 13 Jul 2006 20:20:00 GMT

ya kiss craig?