Three years later
Alfajores and croissants. The passage of time at two speeds. I reread what I wrote about León's unforgettable birth.
León turned three last week. For breakfast, he asked for alfajores, the Argentinian shortbread-like cookies filled with dulce de leche, and medialunas, Argentina’s version of croissants.. Hard to believe this is the same baby who breastfed nonstop and left Irene exhausted. I went back to read what I wrote right after he was born, in those days when he slept through most of the day.
Some things haven’t changed — the self-imposed pressure, the high expectations, the uncertainties — and others took a turn we never imagined, like our family’s geographical destiny.
Our youngest was born in Greece, where we lived for five years. This past August, we moved to Cambridge, just outside Boston. We’ll be back in Greece in June. Life, really, is what happens in the transitions between moves, trips, and fellowships.
There’s one thing I’m proud of: in that first welcome text, I promised León I’d spend a lot of time with him. I kept that promise, and I think it was a good bet. Beyond the obvious, I still don’t fully understand the impact of spending so much time with my kids, but the future will bring more answers — for them and for me.
Looking at photos, it feels like time flew by. But there are days — more precisely, hours — that seem endless. Like last week, when León cried non-stop for more than an hour, until he finally fell asleep in my arms at 7 p.m. and didn’t wake up until 10 the next morning. Why couldn’t he calm down, if this wasn’t the first time he was completely exhausted? Some questions just don’t have answers.
A constant challenge is to enjoy this chapter of childhood — demanding, exhausting, and unique as it is. I want to really internalize the idea that every hour I spend with my kids isn’t time “lost” to something else.
That mercantilist logic doesn’t help me and doesn’t feel true: every moment with them is a once-in-a-lifetime experience, one I end up valuing even more in hindsight. That becomes clear when I remember little stories, or see photos from the first time Lorenzo held León in his arms.
I’d love to dig deeper into all this, but I don’t have the time. I’m writing this in the short window before I go pick León up from preschool to celebrate his third birthday. I’m taking the afternoon off for him — which, in a way, is also taking the day off for myself.
I’ll leave you with the text I wrote when León was born. A lot of new readers have joined over these three years, so for most of you, you’ll read it for the first time. Here it is, along with two versions of the beautiful song O Leãozinho (click here or below):
That’s it for today. Thank you very much to those who keep sharing this newsletter, subscribing and writing to me (you can always do it by answering this mail, I answer everything!).
I love it when you send me suggestions or complete, criticize or correct some idea. I also love it when you share your own experiences. From the bottom of my heart, thank you so much.
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Warmly,
Nacho
Before on Recalculating:
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