Family Matters
Hello people!
So. I'm fucking pissed off. Therapy is where I would like to turn in the future when I feel this way (and can afford a therapist).
Hence my posting here. Okay, we have a drawer in the kitchen designated for chocolate and baking supplies. We have three chocolate bars in there for the cookies we're gonna make in the next couple of days. Dad came out of the kitchen tonight with a chocolate bar in his hand, asking if we wanted some chocolate from his "secret chocolate stash."
It was the same kind of bar that was in the drawer, so I logically thought that he had gotten it from the drawer with the baking supplies in it. Mom and I both asked him where he got it cuz HELL-FUCKING-O?! I wanted to fucking know. Eventually, we found out he didn't get it from the baking supplies drawer, and I said, "Why couldn't you just say that?!" Cuz he avoided the question when we asked.
I guess I sort of yelled at him, but I just wanted to know the fucking answer. He wouldn't answer the question and it really fucking annoyed me. Okay, so, shoot ahead about fifteen minutes. We were watching TV and the show came back, but dad didn't unmute it - he had his eyes closed when I looked over at him. So I said, "Dad, the show's back." And he very snottily said, "Yeah, thanks."
I asked him what his problem was and he said, "Sometimes, you should just keep your damn mouth shut." I said what did I do to him, and he said, "Sometimes, you should just mind your own business for once." I got beyond furious. I cannot begin to explain how angry I was. I started crying, because when I'm angry, I don't yell, I don't throw shit or anything, I cry. I bawl, cuz it's all I can do.
Dad went upstairs and I cooled down a little. Then mom told me, "You need to stop being so disrespectful to dad." ALL I DID WAS ASK HIM A QUESTION. Yes, okay, I admit I was provoking a little, I wasn't the nicest I could've been, but he was being fucking annoying and avoiding the question! I just wanted a goddamn motherfucking answer! I got angry all over again.
The dog came downstairs and mom yelled up to Nick - bro - to get him to put the dog back in his room. Dad thought that mom had called him, instead of Nick, so he yelled back down to mom. Mom got frustrated and yelled at dad, who then got Nick. They had a little conversation and dad asked if Nick took the dog out recently (we can hear everything that's said upstairs from the living room).
Mom said, "No. No. No." Nick said, "No one was talking to YOU, mom." What was said then? Dad said, "Nick. *sigh*" Mom grumbled something under her breath. Nick took the dog out and slammed the door, then slammed the door again when he brought the dog in. What happened? Nothing. No asshole remarks to Nick. Nothing telling him how wrong he is for being such a fuckhead.
Nothing. NOTHING. WHY DIDN'T THEY SAY ANYTHING TO HIM, BUT I GET REPRIMANDED FOR SOMETHING THAT, I THINK, IS A MUCH LESSER OFFENSE? THIS IS WHY I AM FUCKING PISSED OFF BEYOND REASON. This is NOT GODDAMN FAIR. I am so fucking sick of EVERYTHING, I can't stand it! I don't know what to say, except I NEED TO KNOW SOMETHING.
Am I totally out of line or am I right? Please please tell me I'm not fucking insane, cuz I feel like I'm losing my mind sometimes. I feel like things are so out of whack, things are so wrong here, sometimes, that I must be wrong. I just feel like I need validation that I'm not totally out of my head.
So. I'm fucking pissed off. Therapy is where I would like to turn in the future when I feel this way (and can afford a therapist).
Hence my posting here. Okay, we have a drawer in the kitchen designated for chocolate and baking supplies. We have three chocolate bars in there for the cookies we're gonna make in the next couple of days. Dad came out of the kitchen tonight with a chocolate bar in his hand, asking if we wanted some chocolate from his "secret chocolate stash."
It was the same kind of bar that was in the drawer, so I logically thought that he had gotten it from the drawer with the baking supplies in it. Mom and I both asked him where he got it cuz HELL-FUCKING-O?! I wanted to fucking know. Eventually, we found out he didn't get it from the baking supplies drawer, and I said, "Why couldn't you just say that?!" Cuz he avoided the question when we asked.
I guess I sort of yelled at him, but I just wanted to know the fucking answer. He wouldn't answer the question and it really fucking annoyed me. Okay, so, shoot ahead about fifteen minutes. We were watching TV and the show came back, but dad didn't unmute it - he had his eyes closed when I looked over at him. So I said, "Dad, the show's back." And he very snottily said, "Yeah, thanks."
I asked him what his problem was and he said, "Sometimes, you should just keep your damn mouth shut." I said what did I do to him, and he said, "Sometimes, you should just mind your own business for once." I got beyond furious. I cannot begin to explain how angry I was. I started crying, because when I'm angry, I don't yell, I don't throw shit or anything, I cry. I bawl, cuz it's all I can do.
Dad went upstairs and I cooled down a little. Then mom told me, "You need to stop being so disrespectful to dad." ALL I DID WAS ASK HIM A QUESTION. Yes, okay, I admit I was provoking a little, I wasn't the nicest I could've been, but he was being fucking annoying and avoiding the question! I just wanted a goddamn motherfucking answer! I got angry all over again.
The dog came downstairs and mom yelled up to Nick - bro - to get him to put the dog back in his room. Dad thought that mom had called him, instead of Nick, so he yelled back down to mom. Mom got frustrated and yelled at dad, who then got Nick. They had a little conversation and dad asked if Nick took the dog out recently (we can hear everything that's said upstairs from the living room).
Mom said, "No. No. No." Nick said, "No one was talking to YOU, mom." What was said then? Dad said, "Nick. *sigh*" Mom grumbled something under her breath. Nick took the dog out and slammed the door, then slammed the door again when he brought the dog in. What happened? Nothing. No asshole remarks to Nick. Nothing telling him how wrong he is for being such a fuckhead.
Nothing. NOTHING. WHY DIDN'T THEY SAY ANYTHING TO HIM, BUT I GET REPRIMANDED FOR SOMETHING THAT, I THINK, IS A MUCH LESSER OFFENSE? THIS IS WHY I AM FUCKING PISSED OFF BEYOND REASON. This is NOT GODDAMN FAIR. I am so fucking sick of EVERYTHING, I can't stand it! I don't know what to say, except I NEED TO KNOW SOMETHING.
Am I totally out of line or am I right? Please please tell me I'm not fucking insane, cuz I feel like I'm losing my mind sometimes. I feel like things are so out of whack, things are so wrong here, sometimes, that I must be wrong. I just feel like I need validation that I'm not totally out of my head.