:-D

Let me show you the hall of screaming skulls

infinityduck — Wed, 22 Jun 2011 22:01:30 GMT

Hello traveler!

You probably came here from my girlfriend maypirate's journal, because I can't possibly think of any other reason you'd be here. I'm sorry to report that this little experiment in "blogging" didn't quite grab me, as you probably tell by the lack of updates in the last 100 years. I do still like the idea of a blog, and someday I may give it another shot.

In the meantime... enjoy this, or perhaps this, or even this.

The croissants of our love

infinityduck — Fri, 04 Mar 2011 23:55:21 GMT

Why hello maypirate. It's always a pleasure to see you. Please, come join me on my classy patio.

I must apologize for missing your birthday. I was looking forward to it all year. But you see, I have been so busy lately...

There were so many puppies to cuddle...

So many espressos to taste...

And movies to see. Did you happen to catch The American last autumn? I'm in it, you know.

And of course, there was much work to be done in Washington. Here's me, sharing a laugh with my friend Barack. We're BFF's.

But all of this hard work left me so tired, so emotionally drained. I needed to do something to lift my spirits.

So I took a vacation.

I decided to grow a moustache and practice my levitation skills.

But I learned that there are consequences waiting for those that seek power.

Terrible consequences.

Fortunately, I've since learned to control my power, and use it only for good.

So you see, I've had quite a year. My only regret is that my travels have kept me far away from you. Yet now that you are here with me, it seems like we were never apart.

Close your eyes. ... Okay, you can open them.

Happy birthday. I made these croissants for you. They are the croissants of our love.

But enough talk. Words are such futile devices.

Come, join me in the water. Let us make the most of the time we are given.

We will have a party. Your party. Today.

And tomorrow.

And forever.

You electrify my life

infinityduck — Sun, 13 Sep 2009 13:51:57 GMT

Seven months ago I travelled 600 miles to meet Amber (maypirate) in person for the first time. We had only known each other for a month, but during that month we talked online and on the phone so often that it felt like we had known each other for much longer than that. She was funny, intelligent, attractive, sassy, and dreamed of someday punching people in the face. After only a couple weeks of chatting I knew I was into her and I had to meet her.

So I did! I said I was going up to Wisconsin to visit old friends, which was true, but the trip was really about Amber. We had an amazing weekend together, but as I drove away Monday morning, I wondered if I'd see her again. I knew I wanted to, because the day after I got home I missed her so much that I physically hurt. She felt the same way, against all of her expectations. One month later I was back, and even though we each had our own strong reservations about our chances, we decided to give this relationship a try.

That was six months ago. Once again it feels like far longer, but at the same time it feels like the months have flown by. I'm living in Wisconsin now, a decision I've never once regretted. Although these past six months have been personally stressful as I've dealt with unstable employment and other life frustrations, Amber has been a constant source of happiness and strength. She's pushed me forward when I've come to a halt. She's been there for me when I've felt overwhelmed. When we're together, the only worry on my mind is whether I'm being as wonderful to her as she is to me. It's hard to remember what my life was like before she became a part of it. I don't want to know.

Last night we celebrated our anniversary by staying in. We watched Battle Royale and drank sake. I cooked kenchin soup and ginger pork. We fell asleep watching MST3K: Space Mutiny. Earlier that afternoon I surprised her at work with flowers. The look on her face was totally worth it. "But it's only been six months!" she said. That's true; six months is relatively short. We've both dated other people for years. Our relationship is only starting out, but I say we couldn't have asked for a better start.

Happy six months, Amber! You are my love, my friend, my co-conspirator, my inspiration. Thank you for taking a chance on some Internet boy from Tennessee. Even though it's only been six months, I can't wait for the next six, and all of the months after that.

<3

I just wanna tell you how I'm feeling

infinityduck — Tue, 11 Aug 2009 11:49:51 GMT

I drove to Anoka, MN (near Minneapolis) on Sunday for jesslyn's Going Away/Beat Cancer party. She was diagnosed with thyroid cancer last year, but has kicked cancer's ass with treatment, surgery and unshaken perserverance. Her and her boyfriend Jason have been my best online friends for the past three years, and I finally got to meet them in person. We all met online playing City of Heroes; they've been dating for over two years despite being separated by 1,200 miles. She will be moving in with him in North Carolina on Wednesday.

My visit was filled with adventure: After the obligatory friends and family party, the three of us escaped to see G.I. Joe. (Micro-review: ZOMG EXPLOSIONS!!!) After that we had a bit of trouble finding a place to eat at 10:00. Khan's Mongolian Barbecue: Closed. Perkins: Closed?? IHOP: WTF, closed too!? Finally we found a Boston's Gourmet Pizza that was open. As we walked through the front door we paused, as the song playing inside sounded familiar... "Hey, isn't that Rick Astley?"

Yes, it was. We did indeed get Rickrolled.

In other news, I've been having a hard time relaxing lately. I feel mildly nervous almost all the time, like I'm bracing for an impact, like I'm expecting things in my life to suddenly go wrong. Maybe I'm so used to the feeling of being stressed out all the time from when I was unemployed that I'm having trouble not being stressed. Honestly, I have very little reason to feel this way. I'm employed, I'm healthy, I have great friends, I'm dating a wonderful woman... The only thing even somewhat unstable in my life is my job situation, which is still much improved compared to a few weeks ago. I just wish I could sit down and truly relax. The only times in recent memory I've been able to do that has been with maypirate. Meh. I dunno.

In other other news, omg guys check this out AWWWWW!

He'll save children but not the British children

infinityduck — Sat, 01 Aug 2009 00:11:07 GMT

Washington, Washington. Twelve stories high, made of radiation.

Kevin, a long-time Tennessee friend that moved to Madison two years ago, joined me, maypirate, homoshiroi and Joel for dinner at Sa Bai Thong Wednesday night. Much merriment was had, as all five of us share the same unglued sense of humor. Kevin and Joel had much in common: They both like GURPS, lasers and SCIENCE!

One of the coolest things about Madison's bus system (other than the fact that it's worth using, unlike Nashville's) is that every bus has a bike rack on the front. I've been riding my bike the half mile from my house to the bus stop, catching the #4 or #47 bus to the Capitol, then riding my bike the few remaining blocks to work. It's worked out very well... except today I was feeling cocky and decided to bike all the way home. That was more than a little terrifying for a guy who has never biked in traffic before. Granted, it's only a three mile jaunt in one of the most bike-friendly cities in the country, but STILL! I think I'll stick to the bus, at least during rush hour. (Yes, I did read up on the bike laws before I ventured forth.)

Oh yeah, speaking of work! It's a six-week office assistant gig for a life insurance company. My job consists of migrating document images from one archive system to another. There's really nothing much more to say about it. Imagine eight hours a day of "copy, paste, repeat" and you'll have a pretty good idea of what I'm doing. It's terribly dull, but I can't complain. My coworkers are all nice and I get paychecks. My search for more permanent work continues, as this is merely a temporary reprieve from unemployment.

In more geeky news, I finally got into the beta test for Champions Online! It's more or less City of Heroes Version 2.0 and so naturally I've been excited about it for many months. I'm impatiently waiting for the 3.5GB game client to download at this very moment. If anyone's interested I will share as much about my experiences as I can without breaking the non-disclosure agreement.

P.S. There are a bunch of turkeys making lots of noise outside my window. HEY HEY KEEP IT DOWN YOU TURKEYS!!

My first girlfriend turned into the moon

infinityduck — Mon, 27 Jul 2009 20:49:51 GMT

maypirate: Once I colored a page from a coloring book for my friend and wrote "Anyone can drown at any depth" on it and he hung it on his wall.
infinityduck: Can we be friends? For real?
maypirate: Yes. I think so.

The above chat snippet is from 30 minutes into our very first conversation ever, way back in January. I knew right then that she was someone special. :-D

I met homoshiroi and her husband Joel this weekend. maypirate made a delicious beef+tofu+rice dish (EDIT: I am told it is called "mapotofu") and we watched the Found Footage Festival (featuring hunks, pool hustling and Angela Lansbury taking a sensual bubble bath) and The Last Cigarette (featuring the goblin Rep. Henry Waxman grilling tobacco execs). It's always strange to meet someone in person that you've only known as a screen name, but they were both awesome and I am looking forward to hanging out with them more!

My roommate Spencer recently returned home from a 10-day bike ride across Iowa. Now, apart from wondering why anyone would find enjoyment in biking across an entire state, I'm also wondering WHY IOWA?!? (I have nothing against the proud Iowinians or the Hawkeye State, but come on guys. Your state is basically a 300-mile wide cornfield.)

I visit many strange and wondrous sites in my travels on the Internets, and yesterday I found myself on the CIA web site. Apparently they are hiring, so if you've ever dreamed of becoming an assassin, here's your application! I was also amused and slightly disturbed that the CIA has a kids' page, complete with games. I got a perfect score on the Photo Analysis Challenge, which clearly means I'm ready for a career as a spy. Sadly they didn't have my favorite game, the Secret War in Laos Adventure starring Tommy the Junior Tiger Spy.

I finished watching all three seasons of Avatar: The Last Airbender. I blazed through all 61 episodes in less than two weeks because it's just that good! It's an epic quest story (think Lord of the Rings) with such memorable characters and solid writing that you quickly forget that it's supposed to be a kids' show. I'm looking forward to the live-action movie trilogy directed by M. Knight Shyamalan next year.

Hmmm... I know there was something else... oh yeah I got a job! It's a temp job at a life insurance company. Not a great job, but a job nevertheless. I start tomorrow. More on that after my first day.

Future events such as these will affect you in the future

infinityduck — Wed, 22 Jul 2009 18:42:50 GMT

I attended the birthday revelries for cecilmcgrlybts with maypirate last night. I'm fairly sure our server at the Italian restaurant was a Velociraptor in disguise. I had delicious butternut squash ravioli. Later we played Dominion, a nifty card game where the objective is to acquire gold to buy as many moats as possible, if you're playing by maypirate's strategy.

I think there were other more interesting things to share, but I'm distracted by... RIFFTRAX LIVE! Riffing on Plan 9 from Outer Space! From the Belcourt Theater in Nashville!! Broadcasting to a cinema near you August 20!!!

My cabbages!!!

infinityduck — Sun, 19 Jul 2009 22:46:56 GMT

I've discovered that job hunting involves a lot of waiting around for people to get back to you, so I've had plenty of time to catch up on a lot of TV shows on DVD. Currently I'm watching X-Files, Arrested Development, Deep Space Nine and Avatar: The Last Airbender. I figure that should keep me busy for, oh... a few weeks.

YES I KNOW AVATAR IS A KID'S CARTOON SHUT UP. It's a good show! It has memorable characters! It has a flying lemur!

I'm open to more recommendations! What are your favorite TV shows?

Big hands I know you're the one

infinityduck — Thu, 16 Jul 2009 23:08:25 GMT

The show Tuesday night kicked ass! We had technical problems while setting up the stage that delayed the opening band for over an hour, but we still rocked into the early morning and drew a small but enthusiastic crowd. I think we played pretty damn well for having only two weeks to learn 24 songs. All in all it was an amazing night, and I can't wait to do it again next week.

Yes, I am now officially a rock star.

After the show I drove maypirate to the airport in Milwaukee. She's off to Otakon! She's been looking forward to this since before I met her. It was wonderful to see her so excited. I hope she has a great time. If anyone deserves a vacation, it's definitely her.

I'm going to try to make it to Gencon this August. I've never been to a convention, and a lot of my friends from Tennessee will be there. Unfortunately I'm not sure I can afford it. I was sort of expecting to be employed by now, which reminds me...

I've been passed over yet again for a job.

I thought (perhaps hoped) I was becoming numb to rejection, but this one stung particularly deep. It was a web marketing position with Pacific Cycle. I really wanted that job, and I felt I was perfectly qualified for it. Yet apparently there was, once again, someone more qualified out there. Yet I refuse to believe that they wanted it more.

I'm so tired. Tired of the job hunt. Tired of rejection. Tired of feeling useless. I inherited my dad's stubborn optimism; I know that eventually I will find work, but the past few months have tested my limits.

Going down the old mine with a transistor radio

infinityduck — Mon, 13 Jul 2009 17:45:58 GMT

Today is going to be a busy day. I have two job interviews, band practice, grocery shopping, a check to deposit, and a meeting with someone interested in buying my laptop. The next six hours are going to be hectic, but I'm actually looking forward to it. It's nice to have a full schedule after months of having very little to do.

Tomorrow night is the band's first gig. I AM NERVOUS. We somehow learned 24 songs in just two weeks and I'm not sure if I've spent enough time on the harder ones. I'm afraid I'm going to forget a chord progression, or freeze up during a solo, or look like an ass on stage, or generally fuck up in some way. Then I remind myself that things will be fine, it will be lots of fun, and most of the crowd will have a few drinks in them and probably won't realize if I fuck up.

If you'd like to join in the festivities and hear some good live music, drop by Johnny O's Tuesday, July 14. Doors open at 8:00; we start playing at 11:00. No cover charge! Here's the Facebook event page because we're a hip Web 2.0 band.

Johnny O's Restaurant & Bar
620 University Avenue
Madison, WI 53715

Massive Setlist of DOOM:

Ben Folds Five - Brick
Blind Melon - No Rain
Bryan Adams - Summer of 69
Deep Blue Something - Breakfast at Tiffany's
Eagle-Eye Cherry - Save Tonight
Elton John - Rocketman
Eve 6 - Inside Out
Everlast - What It's Like
Foo Fighters - Learn to Fly
Goo Goo Dolls - Slide
Green Day - Boulevard of Broken Dreams
Lynyrd Skynyrd - Sweet Home Alabama
Nirvana - Smells like Teen Spirit
O.A.R. - Hey Girl
Sister Hazel - All for You
Sublime - Santeria
Sublime - What I Got
Third Eye Blind - Jumper
Tom Petty - Free Fallin'
Tonic - If You Could Only See
Train - Drops of Jupiter
Van Morrison - Brown-Eyed Girl
Violent Femmes - Blister in the Sun
Weezer - Island in the Sun

The Tao of the Unemployed

infinityduck — Fri, 10 Jul 2009 23:00:17 GMT

I've been unemployed for a long time. I was laid off from FedEx Kinko's (now FedEx Office, or "F-Off" for short) in Nashville three months ago. I moved to Madison on the promise of a new job with FedEx, only to learn the hard way that promises made by businesses are worthless unless they're written out on paper. Since then I've had very little success in finding work.

Here follows some deep musings on unemployment. If you are not hot for philosophy and introspection, best just to skip it.

"You gotta be able to go out there and do it for yourself. No one's gonna give it to you."
--Joe Strummer

You would think that the longer a person is unemployed, the more motivated they would be to find work. In my experience, the opposite is true. Being unemployed is a lot like a degenerative illness: Week after week of rejections and dead-ends start to wear away at the fighting spirit. Depression sets in, bringing with it feelings of failure and worthlessness.

My cousin Jason has also been unemployed for a long time. He's all but given up on the job hunt, opting instead to spend most of his time playing video games. I understand the frustration he must be feeling; many nights it's been far easier to strap on the headphones and see who's online in Steam rather than slag through another batch of unappealing job postings. But I also understand that doing nothing isn't going to make the problem go away.

Jason's wife walked out on him a few days ago, and I can't say I blame her. When I was a child I looked up to Jason like the older brother I didn't have. I wanted to be just like him; there didn't seem to be anything he couldn't do. It's troubling to learn that someone you idolized has the same problems you do and doesn't seem to be handling them well.

If I've taken anything positive from being jobless, it's the lesson that the only future you can expect is the one you build for yourself from the ground up. No one is going to come knocking on your door offering the perfect job; in fact, no one is ever going to seek you out unsolicited unless they want something from you. This may seem like a pretty bleak outlook, but I find it wonderfully optimistic. I'd much rather take control and shape my life the way I choose instead of resign to have my life shaped by forces seemingly beyond my control.

That's not to say it's not goddamn hard work... but it's worth it.

This is a very individualistic life philosophy, yet I also believe that no one can do it alone. I know I would be far worse off if I didn't have the support and encouragement of my family and friends. I believe that pure self-reliance is impossible, especially in our modern world (sorry Thoreau!). In the past I often stubbornly refused help because I saw it as a sign of weakness. One of my broad goals in life is to improve the lives of as many people as possible, yet I didn't realize the unfairness in refusing to accept the same from others.

I'm grateful for all of the help I've received over the past months. I want to thank my parents for their encouragement and financial support. I want to thank maypirate for her love and belief in me. I want to thank maypirate's mother and her colleagues for the wonderful advice on job hunting. I want to thank all of my friends for helping to keep my outlook positive.

I have two interviews on Monday: One is for a temporary web developer job at Pacific Cycle, and the other is for a delivery driver job at Rocky Rococo Pizza. They're not the greatest jobs, and they're very much on opposite ends of the employment spectrum, but they have one thing in common: They pay! With any luck I'll be able to report on my new job next week, and then I can start on the real challenge: Finding a good job.

Attack of the 50-foot Memes

infinityduck — Fri, 10 Jul 2009 02:12:55 GMT

Letter Meme
1. Ask for a letter and it shall be given!
2. List in your journal ten things you like that start with that letter.
3. Give out letters to others.
4. ?????
5. PROFIT

From maypirate:

1. Mystery Science Theater 3000!
2. May, the month I was born. Also maypirate.
3. Madison. Let's see if I still love it after winter...
4. Muffins. Fuckin' A.
5. Malaclypse the Younger, philosopher and (non)prophet.
6. Movies. One of the perks of dating a movie buff!
7. Monkey Island.
8. Moogerfoogers!
9. Marty McFly. This is heavy, Doc...
10. Three-way tie between marshamllows, meerkats and Mr. T.

Words Meme
You are given five words that remind me of you. Your mission, should you choose to accept it, is to write about those five things in your journal. Good luck, and pass the meme on to others. This journal will self-destruct in five seconds.

From maypirate:

Cats - What?! I like cats. Almost as much as I like lemurs. I LIKE CUTE THINGS SHUT UP. (Extra credit: Sand cats!)

City of Heroes - Ah yes, my old ~~addiction~~ MMORPG of choice. I played for two years and had a ton of fun. The game's strong roleplaying community introduced me to many friends and got me writing fiction again. Those were good times... I quit early this year when my group of friends began to dissolve, taking the fun with it. But I do miss it.

Raptors - I had a dream last night that I was in the sewers under London trying to prevent a velociraptor attack. I can't remember all the details, but my brilliant plan somehow involved fishing line. Anyway, raptors are awesome and terrifying (awesomely terrifying?) and my greatest goal in life looks something like this.

Pinot grigio - Last year I discovered that not all wine is disgusting and tastes like old shoe! Many varieties are very tasty, Pinot grigio being one of my favorites. Also... this.

Boss - I'm the boss.

Domo says...

infinityduck — Tue, 07 Jul 2009 08:06:12 GMT

"Step away from the computer and go to bed."

You can be Lady Gaga, I can be T-Pain

infinityduck — Mon, 06 Jul 2009 00:34:59 GMT

My house is in the middle of the UW Arboretum, a nature preserve in downtown Madison next to Lake Wingra. I love it; I'm surrounded by dense forest, I'm literally next door to a neighborhood park, and packs of wild turkeys roam the roads! My cell phone reception isn't great, but that's my only complaint about my neighborhood.

There is a small beach on Lake Wingra two miles from my house. I've been riding my bike through the Arboretum and spending lazy afternoons there. I haven't had regular access to a beach since I lived in Philadelphia and would go to the Jersey shore. Granted, it's not quite the same as the ocean, but it's still nice to lounge in the sun and go for a swim. I took advantage of the 80 degree weather today to combat my pasty paleness. Results: Only a mild sunburn!

In other news...

Someday I hope to do something, anything that's as creative as this.

I'm Guybrush Threepwood, a mighty pirate!

infinityduck — Sat, 04 Jul 2009 17:42:30 GMT

Happy 233rd birthday America! We will always love you, despite your learning disabilities and difficulty getting along with your peers. I plan on celebrating in the traditional way with explosives and meat. But not meat explosives, although I like the way you think.

Last weekend maypirate and I experienced despair and hopelessness in their undiluted forms while playing a video game called Pirates: Legend of the Black Buccaneer. This game... well, it's special. Not only does the game fail to give players any compelling reason to progress through the flimsy facade they call a plot, but it actually punishes players by saddling them with a control system that makes you want to bang the controller repeatedly against the floor. Amber and I finally stopped playing when we encountered a bug in the game that prevented the son-of-a-bitch pirate protagonist from advancing without falling to his doom.

Gamespot generously gave Pirates 3.9 out of 10. One of the player reviews very adequately sums up the experience: "Well, it's the best pirate game I've ever played." Fortunately I have played a better pirate game, which happens to also be my favorite adventure game of all time: The Curse of Monkey Island.

I mentioned it yesterday, but I really am excited about the upcoming Tales of Monkey Island and The Secret of Monkey Island: Special Edition. The Monkey Island series follows the adventures of Guybrush Threepwood (a mighty pirate!) as he searches for treasure to win the heart of his girlfriend, all the while battling the undead forces of the zombie pirate LeChuck. These are arguably some of the funniest games ever created. Here's some of my favorite dialog from early in Curse when Guybrush meets Murray, the body-less yet headstrong skull...

Everyone looks good in a fedora

infinityduck — Fri, 03 Jul 2009 23:28:55 GMT

maypirate and I seem to be watching a lot of crime movies set in the 1930's lately. The Sting, Public Enemies, and last night it was Bonnie and Clyde. I have come to the conclusion that the fashion of that era needs to make a comeback. I want more reasons to wear a three-piece suit and fedora, dammit!

In other news... I'm in a band!

I met a guy named Andrew whose band was looking for a bass guitar player. After an amazing six-hour jam, I was invited to join. It's a cover band that plays at Johnny O's in downtown Madison. The song selection is your standard alternative and classic rock fare; list after the cut.

Aerosmith - I Don't Want to Miss a Thing
Ben Folds Five - Brick
Bryan Adams - Summer of '69
Deep Blue Something - Breakfast at Tiffany's
Elton John - Rocket Man
Eve 6 - Inside Out
Goo Goo Dolls - Slide
Green Day - Boulevard of Broken Dreams
Jet - Look What You've Done
Lynyrd Skynyrd - Sweet Home Alabama
Matchbox 20 - Push
Sister Hazel - All for You
Sublime - What I Got
Tom Petty - Free Fallin'
Tom Petty - Mary Jane's Last Dance
Tonic - If You Could Only See
Train - Drops of Jupiter
Weezer - Island in the Sun

I was a little hesitant about joining a cover band. I'd prefer originals, but after ten years of playing in "bands" that have gone absolutely nowhere, all I want to do is play live. Plus, this band actually gets paid! We may be playing gigs in as little as two weeks, which means I need to start practicing. A lot.

EDIT: A new Monkey Island game?! STOP THE PRESSES!

EDIT2: We're also getting a remake of The Secret of Monkey Island too?! Oh god I think I'm having a heart attack...

EDIT3: You're telling me that TMNT: Turtles in Time is being remade too?! I... I can't... this is just too much awesomeness...

I like baseball, movies, good clothes, fast cars... and you

infinityduck — Fri, 03 Jul 2009 22:45:31 GMT

I partied like Clark Gable last night with maypirate and the extras from Public Enemies. We gathered before the premiere at The Jade Monkey cocktail lounge. Everyone was all dressed up in 1930's attire: I wore a fedora and a private eye trench coat, and she wore a classy red dress. I ordered a Mint Julep, which I quickly added to my ever-growing list of cocktails I'll never order again.

Many of the scenes in the film were shot in Wisconsin, so the premiere was a big deal. There were classic cars on display at the theater, reporters waiting in the lobby, and more extras dressed in costume excited to see the film they helped create. The film itself was very good, and all the extras enjoyed trying to spot themselves.

There was an afterparty at the senior center in Columbus, WI near a street used for filming several scenes. It wasn't a fancy party; just pizza, cake and champagne. maypirate won a raffle for a framed movie poster. Overall an exciting night!

P.S. Dad: Thank you for the trench coat! I knew I'd get some use out of it somehow.

Has it only been a month?

infinityduck — Wed, 01 Jul 2009 19:36:26 GMT

About a month ago I left Nashville, my home of 12 years. I packed as many of my belongings as I could fit inside my car and drove 650 miles to my new home in Madison, WI. Saying goodbye to friends and family was difficult, but there were more friends waiting for me up north, including the woman I love. This journal is for my friends and family that are far away, as well as my new friends that I'm still getting to know.

I honestly don't know where to begin. So much has happened in the last month, and I feel the need to share all of the stresses and successes of getting settled into my new home. But there will be plenty of time for catching up, just not tonight. I have a date with a movie star to her film's premiere, and I need to look good.