Limitless Potential

RP Log with musicalmedic | Secrets Revealed

2010-04-02T08:38:42Z

[Follows THIS, THIS and THIS]

Nathan slotted some coins into the vending machine of the staff cafeteria and selected a Red Bull from the menu. He was rostered on to a rotation of nights, and he was smack in the middle of the stint. The thing was, he just always had difficulty sleeping in the day with working nights. Some shift workers just did and Nathan was one of them. His mind just thought it should be up in the day light hours, even if he had been up all night. So, needless to say, he hadn't slept too soundly during the day, but he still had to get through the night ahead of him. Red Bull and coffee really were gifts from the gods. Red Bull might not give him wings, as the slogan went, but it definitely gave him a push to get through his shift.

He had decided to come in a little earlier that evening, though. He had wanted to try and catch Peter at the tail end of his shift before he went home, if he could. He knew the whole accident ordeal had affected a lot of people. That extended family were well-known in the hospital, with a few of them staff members there. It was impossible to not have the whole thing hit home on some level. Nathan had known Luke for a few years, and he knew Aiden by default. Aiden had often been at The Bondi when Nathan was working there, and he had always been a friendly guy. In fact, Nathan stopped in on the ICU before heading to the staff cafeteria, just to show his support. Aiden and Patrick were now in the same room together. Patrick was asleep, although the deep frown on his face, even in his sleep, said a lot. Aiden just looked ill. His throat and head were heavily bandaged, with some of his arms and torso dressed from the glass cuts. He was extremely pale from the blood loss and he was being ventilated through a trachy in his throat. It was just never easy to see anyone knew, let alone an acquaintance, like this. Nathan left the ICU feeling inevitably sad and downheartened. He couldn't not be. It was impossible not to try and put himself in Patrick's shoes and wonder how he would feel if it was ever Mel that was seriously injured of ill. Nathan just couldn't fathom it.

He was cracking open the can of Red Bull when he did managed to intercept Peter on his way out of the ER. He pushed his bag further over his shoulder and caught up with the nurse. "Peter," he said giving the guy a faint smile. "I just wanted to come haunt you for a bit, make sure you were okay. I tried this morning, but you were in the debrief."

It took Peter a moment to actually realise who was speaking to him as he stared at Nathan. His brow had a deep frown etched into it, and he raised his hand to push his fingers through his dark hair as he cleared his throat. He had about ten thousand things on his mind, none of which seemed to be bringing him much joy. He'd watched Pat and Aiden come in, even helped out with the trauma, but it was watching Riley Browne's downward spiral that was really doing his head. Not to mention the fact that Randy was pregnant and he hadn't even told anyone yet. Neither of them had.

If he was honest with himself there was a small part deep inside that wanted to run around and scream it from the rooftops and kiss random strangers because it was his kid she was carrying. A tiny little Petrelli was inside her, and the truth was he was just a little bit more in love with her for having his kid, even if neither of them had been especially ready. They'd only just worked out it might be good to try at some point, and the next thing he knew she was telling him he was pregnant.

Just like Mel was pregnant. Peter looked at Nathan, and all he could picture was a pregnant Mel which made him want to picture Randy naked with a baby bump. And even under all the stress, that thought just made him a little horny, and all the more frustrated he wasn't home with Randy right then. "Nate," he murmured as he tried to make his face relax. "Sorry, lost in my own world. Didn't even realise it was you at first. I'm fine. Just... tough. You know how it goes. Debriefs are necessary, but hardly fun."

Nathan laughed softly but nodded in understanding. "Hey, I've never had much of a memorable face," he joked, but he was watching Peter with more than just a hint of concern. "I've never actually had to go through one, touch wood, but I do hear they're taxing, going over all that happened. I've only managed to catch snippets of info about what happened, and I've just been to see Aiden and Pat in the ICU. It's... man, it really makes you take stock of your own life, and see that maybe not everything is as bad as it feels. And as crass as it makes it sound, I'm sort of glad I didn't keep my dick in my pants with Mel. I feel fortunate we're going to have kid right now, knowing that not everyone is so lucky to have it so easy." He gave his head a tiny shake. "But anyway, I wanted to just make sure you were okay. I heard it was a real long night for you, you had a lot to deal with and I, uh... Randy and Mel have been a little..." he waved his hand, trying to find a polite word, "intense."

Peter stared at Nate again, missing the cue for him to laugh. He had a delayed reaction, and huffed out a breath in response. He gave his head a little shake as he tried to clear his head, and focus on the conversation. He actually liked Nathan a lot, the guy his first real male friend in Princeton. He felt like a dick for not being able to converse properly, and Peter was really wishing like hell there was some kind of power for magically coping, and acting completely normal while everything fell to shit around him. "I really hope you never have to, man, and I really wish I don't need to go through one again." He managed a slight smirk at the pants comment, and scratched at his chin. "Tell me about it. I really have been forced to think about what's going on. Watching Randy, watching everyone here... Realising I'd do just about anything for them. I felt like I was mostly on the outside of the group until now, but what a welcome." Peter raised his eyebrows. "Tell me about, trust them both to get knocked up at the same time."

Nathan had been all ready with answers, probably questions, even enquiries as to how Peter really was, despite the obvious facade he was putting up. Nathan suspected it was a facade he was well used to putting up, and it would probably be difficult to breach, but he could be pushy when he wanted to be and he did worry about his new friend. They were practically family by this point. But all of Nathan's rational thoughts felt like they just got slammed into a wall and his mouth dropped open. He couldn't find any words, and instead, just stood there, floundering as he held his hand out, waving it a little in question. His face, though, was just a pure picture of utter shock.

Peter hadn't realised at first that he'd let slip the secret he and Randy had decided to keep, not until he glanced up to find Nathan gaping at him. He went back over what he had just said and let out a tired groan. "Shit... I can't believe I just said that. She's, ah, she's not pregnant. Just... sympathetic," he quickly replied as he tried to backtrack miserably.

Nathan gave a half-hearted point with a shake of his head. "No... no..." he managed to get out through his shock, glancing back behind him as he wet his lips. He knew Mel didn't know. Her twin was pregnant, and Mel didn't know. "You would've said sympathetic. Sympathetic isn't knocked up and you said knocked up. Not to mention she's been acting weird and avoiding Mel, then Mel's been avoiding her because she thinks she's been making Randy act weird. She's been thinking it's her fault, man! And you've all been keeping this a secret? How is that fair? That's not fair. She gets upset enough as it is without needing to think she's breaking her sister!"

Peter scrubbed his hand over his face before reaching out to pull Nate into an empty doorway. Or at least as empty as the places got around PPTH. He dropped his voice, not exactly wanting any of the hospital gossips to hear a word. He was sure most of them just lurked around corners for those moments when something juicy was going down. They really did have nothing better to do. "Not on purpose... much. She just didn't really want to tell anyone, and you shouldn't exactly tell anyone until you're sure the baby's okay, and there's something to tell. I don't even know how the fuck it happened. We're always careful, always use protection, and she's on the pill! And it's also kind of killing me that I can't tell anyone because I'm happy about it. It makes me smile, but I'm still not really sure if she's okay with the whole thing... She's just... well, you've seen what they're like. Sometimes I'm not even sure if I can talk to her about it." He wet his lips. "I'm sorry Mel thinks she broke her sister, but she didn't. I did."

Nathan couldn't help but be annoyed, and it was the first thing that broke through after the shock. He was frowning and pressed his lips together for a few moments as he tried to process it all. "Look, trust me, I know how hard this must all be for you. I really do. But... but... if you come to the point of explaining this again to Mel, or hell, even Matt, you might not want to take that route because Mel isn't just 'anyone'. Even if you didn't tell anyone else, you both should have told Mel, she deserves to know. Randy was the first person Mel told when she discovered she was pregnant, before she even told me. I'm sorry how it all went down and that Randy's freaking out about it. Freaking out is natural, especially when you have a whole lot ahead of you that could be affected by a baby coming into things. But... I don't know... maybe Randy doesn't think she can talk to you about what's scaring her because she knows you're happy and will upset you? She's supposed to be graduating and starting her career in a few months, which sounds like it might land right about the middle of the pregnancy. That's... she's probably really not okay with it yet, man. No wonder she's freaking out. Has she had an exam? How far along is she?"

Peter watched Nathan, and felt guilt start to bubble up inside him before he slumped back against the wall, and pushed his fingers through his hair again. He wasn't entirely sure at which particular moment the shit had hit the fan, or if maybe just he was so used to it he didn't know any other way. He held his hand out helplessly as he looked at Nathan again. "She won't even take a test, how's she supposed to tell Mel? She's in denial, that's why she won't talk to me about it. She doesn't want to know. She doesn't want to think all her dreams are about to come to a shuddering halt because of my stupid sperm. She's more than freaking out, she's playing ostrich. And I don't know what to do! I just don't. I don't know how to get her to accept it. She won't get rid of the baby, but she won't acknowledge what's going on either. So no, she hasn't had an exam, and I wouldn't have a clue how far along she is. Enough to be messing with her head, and probably messing with her body but she won't admit it. She's late, she's got the sore breasts, I'm still surprised she hasn't starting throwing up yet, but she will."

Nathan stepped closer to Peter and leant against the wall beside him, looking over at the blank wall opposite from them. "It takes two to make a baby, mate. Cliche, I know, but absolute truth." He paused, resting his tongue on his upper like while he thought about it. "Mel told me Randy was acting weird about two weeks ago, that the pregnant cooties were rubbing off. Something like that. She can't be too far along. She might be throwing up, just not making it an obvious thing. A running tap in the bathroom can do wonders for being a sneaky bugger sometimes. You've got to get a test, take it home to her, tell her you'll stick around while she does it. You just might need to take the upper hand. You're in this for the long run, right? Sometimes you need to give the person you love a bit of a nudge in the right direction. If it's confirmed, she can start dealing with it. She can't play ostrich forever and she really needs to get an exam, make sure she's okay and the baby is."

"How's Mel and your baby?" Peter found himself asking as he tried to pull himself together. It really had been a long couple of days, and with the added stress over Randy and the pregnancy he really did feel like he was going to collapse. "Yeah, I know. She's been acting strangely for a little while, and it seemed to almost kill her to admit it. I suppose you're right about needing to take the upper hand. I don't want anything to happen with her... or the baby. I want to protect them both, I'm just scared of pushing her too far."

Nathan nodded. "They're okay. Well, or as well as they can be at this point in it all. It's just a matter of taking each day. Things have been stressful all around. I've had nights, which doesn't really help. I'm not much of a sleeper in the day." He looked over Peter's face, recognising the same signs of tiredness, exhaustion, stress. "Is your fear of pushing her too far greater than your want to protect her and take care of her?" he asked quietly but pointedly. "If she's anything like Mel... and she is, whoa is she like Mel right now... she's going to just need help, TLC, someone to explode at or cry with when things feel sucky."

Peter nodded slowly, and wet his lips. "Good, I'm glad... I hope they'll stay okay. I hope we'll all be okay. Shit, Nate. I don't know how any of this happened. I mean, I do, it just feels like it's all catching up with me, you know? I got out of my nights. Someone called in sick for the day shifts, so they switched me. Apparently it was easier replacing me than the other nurse. Go figure. I've always hated trying to sleep during the day after a night shit." Peter arched an eyebrow as he pressed his lips together, actually having to stop and think about his answer for a moment. "No, of course not. Can you seriously imagine having the two of them in the same room? I feel like I need armour just from the idea."

Nathan paled just slightly at the thought Mel or the baby might not be okay at some point. He cleared his throat and dropped his gaze down to his feet, the thought still fresh in his mind from visiting Aiden and Patrick. "Yeah, I do know, man. I really do. I was in your shoes a few weeks back, and still sort of trying to flounder my way through it. And just to clear my conscience, I accidentally nearly kissed Randy this morning. She shoved me and nearly caused me to go ass over tit into a trash can. Mistaken identity. Don't be lulled into a false sense of hair dye security."

Peter hadn't been sure what Nathan was about to say but after a moment of staring at the other man he just started to laugh. "Seriously? Shit man, you're a brave one. I'm guessing you didn't see the hair, or you'd know. Truthfully I'm still grateful for the hair dye thing. I was petrified about kissing the wrong one as soon as she told me she was a twin. I like my balls where they are, I don't need to get caught out kissing your girlfriend instead of mine."

Nathan turned red and then put his hand over his face. "Hey, I am living proof they won't let it happen by accident. She had her hair all hidden by a hoodie, and I just thought it was Mel coming for her work at the florist, when it was Randy here to speak to Lachlan. I shouldn't try to communicate with anyone after a nightshift, it's always going to get me into trouble or bruised or something. But you should get some sleep, man. None of this will sound any easier when you haven't slept. Trust me, I had to try and deal with it when I was sick and, well, I really didn't. I didn't deal with it well at all."

Peter reached out to give Nathan's shoulder a squeeze, still chuckling to himself at the idea of Randy definitely not taking to the other man's accidental attempts at kissing. "It's alright, man. You really don't need to explain. I'm just relieved it was you and not me that did it first. Pretty sure Mel would start to channel her sister if I did, and I don't feel like seeing her pissed off. You're dealing with it now thought, right? And Mel would have understood. But I know what you mean, and I'm really hoping I do manage to crash."

Nathan gave a slight shrug, chewing on the corner of his lip. "Not really? I'm still processing it, I still need to talk to my family. I'm still not entirely sure how it's all going to work out with my work, I still don't know how I am going to have the energy to work and be a father when I can barely get through the day on my busy weeks now. So no, not really dealing with it, I'm just good at putting up appearances. I wish it was all hearts and roses and baby fun, but it's reality and reality is, we have an accidental, unplanned pregnancy on our hands. It's not easy, by any means."

Peter nodded slowly. "I'm hearing you. I really am. And hey, if you ever need anything, just let me know. Let us know..." Peter stifled a yawn, now that he had stopped for a few moments, even if it was leaning against a wall, he could feel his body willing him to just crash out. He still had the drive home to get through. "I don't know how it's going to work, either. Especially with Randy wanting to get out into the world and start shrinking people. Truth is, I think I'd happily be the stay at home dad for a little while." He blinked, pushing off the wall to stand a little straighter. "I think I have to take home a pregnancy test for Randy. I have no idea how she'll take it. I can't pee for her."

Nathan scratched his head. "I did for Mel... not in the literal sense, but yeah..." He was blushing again and cleared his throat. He really had only wanted to help Mel out the best he could, and that just seemed to be it for that moment. "You're a stronger man than me, mate. You really are. I would love to be a stay at home Dad, but I'm also selfish. I don't want to give my job up. It's just weird, but working hard has always sort of filled that hole inside of not having my brother. If I stopped that, I might well lose it... I don't know, I've never tested the theory. Always just kept my head down, ass up. I guess there is no real answer to any of that, which is probably part of the problem. Especially for Randy. She's spent years trying to learn how to find the answers and help people, but she doesn't have them for herself."

Peter's eyebrows went up. "Seriously? That's... That's something. I've had Randy dress me, but I don't think it's the same kinda thing. Wow, you really... That's something. That's true love right there. I think maybe I just don't have as much to prove to myself professionally. My brother's hole isn't something I can fill by working hard. I just... ignore it as best I can. Focus on Randy. Slowly work up to getting more friends." He shrugged before smiling wryly. "I feel like a hermit anyway, so what's staying at home with a kid? At least I can be a hermit for a reason. You also never had a family before, man. Not like this. You might find the hole starts to ease a little bit... She's really good with helping everyone else, but I'm starting to realise she struggles a little with her own issues."

"I didn't know what else to do to help. She was nervous and worried she wouldn't be able to take the test, so I offered to go before her while she was there. I know it sounds a bit strange, it was the first time ever I've gone to the bathroom in front of a girl, but I think it helped her chill out a little. Things have been a lot more close and intimate between us since that, since we got ill and had to deal with all those horrible things. It's nice. I'm really getting used to it all. But the hole is still there... and who knows? Maybe a baby will fill it, give me a purpose. A tiny part of me hopes it's a boy so I can maybe name him after my brother, but that's just a bit of nostalgia talking. Did you ever want to find your brother or go back to your family? Maybe they'd like to hear you're going to be a dad, when it all settles of course?" Nathan asked hesitantly, not sure if he was crossing the line.

"No, man. It sounds it was the right thing to do. I'm really not one to judge. I'm sure I'll wind up doing weird for Randy whenever she needs me to." He was still smirking a little at the idea of Nathan peeing before Mel, but it was a sweet image really. "That's right, you've done all the tests now. Vomit, sickness, pee... I'm assuming farting's in there. Doesn't exactly leave much between you two. We've just had the whole being hit by a car thing, and her taking care of me while my arm was broken. And this, I guess. Hey, nothing wrong with nostalgia. I think it's a cool idea to name them after your brother. It keeps his memory alive. Sometimes, but mostly I can't think about it without my head starting to hurt. I'm not sure I can handle it. But, ah... maybe you're right about the last part." He let out a sigh, and scratched at his chin. "I just don't want my mother coming anywhere near the baby."

Nathan gave a small laugh. "Actually, I still get nervous about the whole farting thing. I've always been the sort to get embarrassed. I mean, I have absolutely no issues with a girl doing all that in front of me, but when it comes to myself, I must be a gigantic hypocrite. But you should get to some of that. Yeah, it's not pleasant, but it does build trust. Builds some sort of closeness between you, especially when you're living together. It was strange for me to have someone take care of me when I was ill that wasn't my Mom, but it was nice. Have you shared anything intimate like that yet?" he asked, watching his new friend closely. He listened but his eyebrows rose in surprise when the last comment came. "Um... she... has she hurt kids or something?"

Peter chuckled as he tucked his hands into his pockets, his courier bag still slung across his chest. "But why? If she's seen everything else come out of you, a fart's not going to be that bad unless you're trying to Dutch oven her. Which... you know, really isn't high on the romantic stakes. You already know that if you relax, Mel relaxes. Ah, like I said, she did help dress me. She nearly helped me pee in the early days, but then she got all embarrassed and just patted me on the ass before I went in," Peter told Nathan with a grin. It was definitely one of his fondest memories, mostly because Randy was so cute when she was awkward. "Nothing else yet. Neither of us have been sick, and no epic benders to result in hangovers. Well, there was one hangover but that was just a lot of quiet talking and cuddling." Peter looked at Nathan, and gave a slight shake of his head. "No, not physically. Just years of emotional and mental abuse. I don't want her getting her claws in my kid. I don't need her trying to live vicariously through them, or trying to build them up for something like she did with Nathan."

Nathan just waved his hand with a small laugh. "I know, I know. I didn't say I made sense in my hypocrisy. I've always been like that. I was one of those kids at school who would only ever use the bathroom at home because I didn't want other kids to hear me going. This from a doctor, I know. There may have been one or two accidental farts, but either she was polite and didn't say anything or she really didn't hear. She'll probably start getting a complex if I don't relax a bit because being pregnant, she's probably going to be all about the accidental everything soon enough. Would you have let her help you, or did you feel weird about it too? I'm not sure I could be opposed to Mel's hands on my dick in any capacity," he laughed. His face fell though and he gave a small shake of his head in disbelief. "Shit, man, I'm sorry. I'm really, really sorry. I've had kid patients affected by that sort of thing, and it's often worse than the physical stuff. It's stuff they'll never get over. Are you okay? I just gotta say though, I admire you for anticipating your kid and wanting to be a good father. A lot of people who have been through stuff like that get nervous about being a parent themselves... that they might turn out to be like their own parents."

"We all have our own quirks. I mean, I got the White Knight complex, you got the bathroom complex. It's all good. Life would be boring without a few little hiccups." Peter smiled. "I don't know, pretty sure her sister would call me on any farts, so I'm guessing Mel's the more polite out of the two. It's okay to chill. You're gonna be living with her for a while yet, so it's better just to relax now. You don't need the farts building up to the point there's a cyclone by the time you're sixty. And I'm with you there about the hands on my dick. Only clearly Randy's hands, not Mel's. I think it would have been a little weird, but I would have gotten over it if I really needed the help. And yeah, I'm okay. I mean, a little damaged. It's why I'm not so good at talking to people about my life. No one needs to hear this shit. Thanks, and hey, you're doing okay. I just know I'm not going to be like mine. I refuse to turn into them, and I will protect my kid to the ends of the Earth. No one will ever harm them."

Nathan raised his eyebrow curiously. "So, this means you're yet to really breach the whole intimacy thing too. Do you think you will now that Randy's pregnant? Or are you still worried about scaring her away? Because you won't, you know. I'm pretty sure there was even some mention that she was worried why you would want to be with someone like her. I just had a thought, too. That whole cyclone theory, I'm probably completely unbearable in bed when I'm asleep. I relax when I'm asleep. I'm surprised she wants to share a bed with me," he said with a smirk. "So, you're okay with the whole prospect of being a father? Deep down? After everything you've gone through, maybe this will help you find some peace?"

Peter's eyebrows rose again, nearly disappearing up into his hairline. "Are you serious? She really thinks that? Jesus... She has no idea just how amazing she is, does she? I don't think either of them do. I've never met anyone more... well, humble than either of them. They'd give their organs to you if you needed them, but wouldn't understand why that makes them so special. Shit, I can't believe... I don't even know how to make her understand that she's everything I've ever wanted. She's given me more in months than most people have in years. Than my own family ever has." Peter bit his lip briefly in silent contemplation before he smirked back. "I think you're onto something there. Pretty sure your cyclones have already gone global, so there's no hiding. I say be grateful, some chicks really would just kick you out for farting." Peter gave a nod. "Yeah, I am. And believe me it surprises the shit out of me that I'm so sure. I don't know, maybe. Maybe it'll help us both."

"You're right, they are. And I just... did you know Randy was here that night? With the accident? I just get a slight sense right now that you're saying that she might not have told you to not worry you. She was here, she saw Aiden and Pat being brought in. Then she ran into Lachlan, and sat with him while he waited on Aiden in the surgery. I don't know the ins and outs, just that Matt was involved at some point too. From what I hear, Aiden was in a real mess when he got here. Probably not a sight a pregnant brain would have coped with the best. You just need to keep telling her til she starts listening, man. I had to do it with Mel, still need to do it some days. She needs to do it with me. Maybe you need to do something special together? Get some nice takeout, have a bath with candles, just chat?" Nathan suggested, hoping he was helping on some level. But he laughed. "Hey, I once had a chick freak out on me because I threw up in her hearing distance. Mel is one of a kind, and I'm wondering if I should apologise by default for the cyclones. You should tell her about the stay at home Dad thing. It might ease some of the pressure."

Peter raised his hand to ruffle his hair as he gave a nod. "Yeah, yeah... I need to... Shit, she was here? She didn't say. She never..." He drifted off, his mind trying to wrap itself around the fact Randy wouldn't tell him something like that. Why would she say? "Takeout," he murmured again. He blinked and looked up at Nathan. "Hey, look, man I don't mean to bail, but do you mind if I go? It's still early enough that I can get the takeout and fit in the bath, and I really gotta get her one of those tests. I really can't thank you enough though, seriously. I'm really glad I got a friend like you here. Maybe you need to give Mel a call when you can, not to apologise just to let her know you're thinking of her? It's amazing what a call can do."

Nathan took a sip of his Red Bull and shook his head, holding up his other hand. "No, man. You head. I'm about to start my shift anyway. And anytime, you know. Anytime you need anything, just give me a call. I'm not far away, takes nothing to listen." He smiled and nodded. "Yeah, I always call her on my breaks, if they're not too late. Call her on my dinner break to say goodnight, wish her sweet dreams. Helps to hear her voice, especially on a hard shift. Take care, okay, mate? You'll be fine, you'll help her, I know you will."

Peter gave Nathan's shoulder another squeeze as he smiled, the stress finally leaving his features now he had a new purpose. "Thanks, man. I hope your shift tonight doesn't suck, and say hi to Mel for me. You, ah, might need to apologise to her for me at some point once I get Randy to admit she's pregnant. See you around." Peter moved past Nathan as he turned towards the exit, already making a list of things he needed to get on his way home. He was going to make tonight memorable for Randy even if it killed him.

musebysentence | 63.3 Witness

2010-03-14T10:11:02Z

Peter had been content to stay on the outskirts of the bubble with Randy as his link, but the moment Pat and Aiden were in the emergency room he realised he'd do anything for that group.

musebysentence | 58.10 Red

2010-02-21T08:55:16Z

It was nearly the end of his shift before he got Randy's message, and Peter quickly sent a photo in return after finding a red marker to draw a messy love heart on a particular piece of his anatomy.

RP Log with randybyname | Post-Coital Confessions

2010-02-19T11:28:28Z

The sex was hot, and it was sweaty, and as far as Randy was concerned, it was awesome. Peter had come home from work after seven back-to-back shifts in an extremely horny mood. In fact, 'extremely' probably wasn't even an accurate enough description. He was just hot for it, and Randy's text books had no hope. It was probably the high of realising he had four days off ahead of him mixed with the fact he and Randy hadn't seen much of each other that week. Randy wasn't going to complain in any way, shape or form. She had decided around three days ago that she was being left alone with her own thoughts entirely too much. Far, far too much. It was even more prominent with Mel pretty much basically already living with Nate, all they needed to do was shift her stuff. Mel's little issue wasn't helping either. Randy was sure it was sending her completely bonkers. It had to be some sort of twin empathy or mojo that was making her go crazy like this. There was no other sound explanation without driving herself to the nearest shrink for an immediate assessment.

"I want one," Randy found falling from her lips as Peter rolled off her in a sweaty heap and started to get rid of the condom so they could snuggle. She ran her palm over her sweat-slicked belly and turned her messy blonde head on the pillow to look at him, lips pressed together. His hair was sticking up in all directions from where she had her fingers gripped in the thick locks when he went down on her as soon as he got home. His well-toned body had a slick sheen all over it, and he was panting from exertion. And all she could think about was one thing... which was so, so fucking wrong, it wasn't even funny.

Peter didn't much care about his messy hair. He didn't care about hers either as he let out a contented sigh, knotted the condom, and managed to get it into Randy's bin by her desk. He smirked triumphantly before he turned to look at her, not really sure what she'd said at first. His whole body was singing the praises of a spectacular orgasm, and he battling not to just curl up against her and sleep. He reached out to catch her hand as he slid his fingers between hers, and both their hands now rested on her stomach. Peter slid a leg between hers and sucked on his bottom lip as he looked over her face.

Randy was so beautiful when she was all glowing after sex. He just wanted to fuck her all over again, but his dick needed to recover first. Peter pressed a kiss to Randy's shoulder before he rest his head on the pillow next to hers and arched an eyebrow. "Want one what?"

Randy blinked once and then before she could catch it, "A baby," was also falling out of her lips like her tongue suddenly stopped fucking working rationally. If Peter didn't have her hand in his, she would have reached up and smacked herself firmly in the face, and she did indeed squeak in surprise as the words eventuated from her head out of her mouth into a reality. It wasn't just a crazy fucked up mess of thinking in her head anymore, and it was even worse that she couldn't put her finger on where it was coming from other than the fact her twin sense was buzzing in overdrive and making her think that for some reason that because Mel was knocked up, her uterus should be an occupied parking space too. She scrunched up her nose and kicked at the mess of sheets around her foot in frustration.

Peter watched her, his face not betraying anything as his gaze travelled down her body to her stomach where their hands lay. Then he watched her feet kick at the sheets and his tongue darted out to wet his lips. Peter gave her hand a soft squeeze, and stayed close to her so she knew he wasn't running away from the conversation. His brain was just a little slow to respond in a post-coital state. Guys just weren't meant to have D&Ms after sex. They could have them during sex up until a certain point, but after was hard work. "Because of Mel? You don't seem... happy about the want."

Randy made a small noise of frustration. She was having difficulties getting her head to work after sex too, and it still seemed to be on this one tracked mind that had her standing in front of the mirror with Peter's pillow shoved up her top earlier that day like a friggen emo teenager. "I'm not unhappy! It's just... it's just a want that's there and I think that's what it is. How am I even supposed to know? It's weird and I don't even know what it is! But I've turned into this crazy person and I'm doing really stupid things like going down the baby aisle at WalMart and stopping. I stopped in the baby aisle! And I didn't even do it for Mel. I didn't. I told her I did, but I didn't. I'm mental!"

Peter smiled as he moved his face even closer to Randy's and rubbed their hands against her stomach. For someone reason the idea of Randy pregnant with his kid wasn't as scary as he was expecting it to be. No one had ever wanted his kid before. At least he was assuming that she wanted his kid, otherwise he was going to change his mind about this being an awkward conversation. "I don't think you're mental. I think you're watching your sister experience this new thing, and maybe it's making you realise that you do actually want it to." He let go of her hand but only so he could tuck some her blonde strands behind her ear and run his fingertips lightly over the side of her face as he held Randy's gaze. "I love you, Miranda, and if stopping in the baby aisle is something you need to do, then do it. And... if I'm honest I wouldn't mind if we did make a baby. I've never met anyone like you. I think I'd be lucky to have a kid that shared your genes. Fuck knows how we'll pull it off, though."

"No, no. See, when I watch her, I'm all practical and cool aunty with my head on straight. It's when she's not around that my brain breaks. It's like..." Randy paused, biting on her lip as she tried to explain it and looked at him helplessly. "Like, in my gut, somewhere just under my heart, there is this niggle. It started a little while ago, but it was just enough to brush aside. Now, though, whenever I'm alone, it's growing into a monster. I said 'aww' at the Pampers ad. I stuck a pillow up my shirt today! I read the label on a baby food jar to make sure it didn't have too much sodium. I told a mother at the bus stop with a really ugly kid that her kid was beautiful and had a cute nose. The kid looked a bit like smooshed Ewok, but it was still cute!" She snapped her mouth shut again, looking at him with her blue eyes wide. "You want to have a kid with me? But I'm mental? What if I rub the mental off and we get a smooshed Ewok too? And that's the thing! We don't have time. We just don't. I'm nearly finished my degree and you're an awesome nurse! You're amazing, and people need you, because it's completely fucking sucky to have crap nurses, you know!"

"I know," Peter murmured as he continued to watch her with a smile. She was just so damn cute when she rambled and did the wide-eyed thing. It wasn't often that Randy had these kinds of moments. She really was usually all practical and cool girlfriend. Now she was going to be a cool aunty, and Peter felt a niggle he hadn't realised was there until he thought of her as a cool mother. He moved to rest on his elbow, and leaned down to kiss her collarbone, and then the soft flesh of her breast as his hand went back to her stomach and his fingers splayed out over it protectively. "We're both mental, you're just the one that's the most mental right now," he said with a chuckle. "I don't think there's actually anything wrong with getting clucky. Sometimes I think people just know when they're supposed to have a kid. Their body just realises it's ready. Your head might just be a little slow on the uptake." He looked at her from under his dark hair and captured her mouth in a soft kiss. "We have nine months to figure out how we're going to do this... If you do want to do it. I'd love a kid with you, but I can wait. We only just got to the official girlfriend-boyfriend thing. And I'm about to try and work on the moving in thing. Surprise?" he added with a sheepish look before clearing his throat. "So it's not like we're not used to doing things in our own time."

Randy shifted and snaked her arms around him in a tight, clingy hug. "No, see, I need you here right now in case I buy dolls and start dressing them in diapers. You can keep me sane, even if your shifts are all over the place. Which is fine, we can roll with that if you're here. I've never been without Mel before and I think it's broken my brain. But she needs to be with Nate for the same reason. His shifts are just as fucked, but it's great he's stepping up to the plate. Some guys really do just have the boyfriend mojo. Me and Mel never thought we'd find any, let alone two, you know? We always joked that we would share if we found awesome guys, and now we don't have to. But I don't think I'm cut out to be a real mom. Maybe my twin thing just thinks I'm pregnant? Mel and I did share an embryonic sac and cells once. Maybe my uterus just wants to share?"

Peter didn't move out of the clingy hug, and kissed her again as he settled his weight so he didn't squash her. "I'm not going anywhere, promise. You'll have four days of me hanging around like a bad smell and making you wish I was at work again. I just... it's because my shifts are fucked that I want to live with you. I want to spend every second possible with you because I just... Fuck, I get crazy. It's torture not being able to be with you when I'm working this many shifts straight. Not that I'm complaining about the sex we just had. Really fucking not... I'm just selfish." He sucked on his bottom lip as his eyes flicked over her face. "I think you'd be a great real mom. I think my fathering skills are going to be... questionable. Not like I had a decent role model."

Randy pulled back a little with a frown. "Wouldn't that be more reason why you would be an awesome Dad? Look at Nate. He had no father role model, and he's stepped right up to the plate, done all the right things by Mel, even if it took them by surprise," she told him. "I think you would be an awesome Dad. None of your family are like you, from the sounds of it. You couldn't be a nurse if you didn't have some of those inate qualities to take care of people, and taking care of people is like the biggest foundation of being a parent. I used to watch my Mom and Dad with us three and wonder how they hell they didn't want to smack themselves in the head with a spoon to stay sane. Maybe having crap role models makes you all the more better to be one of your own?" She rubbed her hand over her face and sighed. "And you like your job, even if the shifts are crap. You really like it and you're amazing at it. I love what I'm doing, too, or will, once I get qualified and start practicing. Is it really practical to have a kid right now? Maybe we should just do the moving in thing, and put this in a little box as something we could try if everything else goes okay? I'd just get scared I'd wake up one day and think we made a huge mistake."

Peter raised his hand to ease the frown from her face as he rubbed his thumb against her forehead. "I guess so. I never really thought about it. I used to be the cool uncle to Simon and Monty, but Heidi took them away. She's my brother's ex. He hasn't seen his kids in a long time, and neither have I. I don't want it to be like that. I want to be allowed to love my kids and be with them every day. I want them in a loving family, not one that wants them to do all this crap that just fits the parents' dreams, and not the kids'. I think Nate really is doing an awesome job, and I admire him completely for stepping up to the plate. I'd do the same for you, though. I'm sure I would." He kissed the spot he'd just rubbed and then dropped his head to rest it against her shoulder. "We can do the moving thing, and we can do the box thing, but I just want you to know you don't need to not talk about it if it's on your mind. I don't want you to regret anything with us."

Randy pressed her lips together and looked momentarily like she wanted to smack... anyone from Peter's family. "She just took your nephews away? I can't... I... shit, I think I would die if that happened. Not that Mel or Matt ever would do that, but I know your family situation was fucked. And not that I can envisage Matty as a daddy quite yet. He can't seem to quite get his willy to settle in a relationship, even though I think deep down he wants someone." She melted back into the embrace, falling into a brief silence as she thought for a few moments. "Have you ever thought about being a dad? Wondered what your kid might be like? Or what you would like to do with them?"

Peter nodded and held her a little tighter. He could hear how she felt in her voice, and the truth was it was nice to have someone so protective about him. Someone that did actually care. "They were good kids, and Nathan really loved them. Being a father had always been a priority for him until she took them away. I think he slowly just started to forget about them... Even Claire. Although with her it was easier to keep in touch. He wasn't banned from seeing them. Why do you think he can't get his, ah, willy to settle?" He shifted his head to look up at her and pulled his mouth to the side in thought. "Sometimes. Once in a while. Like one of those things you feel kind of naughty thinking about because it's not something you think you should be thinking. Did that make sense? I'd like to think my kid would get everything I didn't. That they'd know they were loved. I've never really had a woman I've thought about having them with, so what they look like is hard. A mini me is just so... egotistical. I'd want them to have your eyes."

"A priority? Even though he had his head up his ass with his politics because he wanted to be president and barely even knew his own brother existed, except to lie about him to better his campaign?" Randy heard the bitterness dripping off her words and she shot Peter a guilty look, clamping her mouth shut just before she had to follow it up with inserting her foot in there. She had always had foot-in-mouth syndrome, but had always been one to speak her mind when it came to threats - even emotional - on people she loved. "I'm sorry. I don't know him, so that was out of line. I'm just taking a leaping guess that the mom took them away from him for a reason, but I won't pry. He just doesn't seem to have a squeaky clean track record, and I've seen what a mom will do to protect their kids if they think they are in any danger. A-All that stuff you told me? If we ever have a kid, they won't be... in danger, will they?"

"Well, the politics, then his kids, then his wife, then probably me. And Mom somewhere next to his politics. I can't helping shaking this feeling that Mom had something to do with Heidi leaving Nathan. I mean, Heidi... she used to be in a wheelchair. Nathan could have dumped his disabled wife if he'd really wanted to, but he didn't. He stuck by her. Of course he also fucked around on her, but he's a politician. It's what they do." Peter frowned as he sucked on his lip. "My brother's really not all that great, is he? I just... I always loved him. It's okay, I don't mind you saying what's on your mind. God knows I probably should have said it any number of times over the years. Heidi didn't seem like she'd leave him after he got hurt... after I hurt him, but then she was just gone." Peter blinked himself back from the memories, and cupped Randy's cheek as he held her gaze. "I will kill anyone that tries to hurt you, or our kids if we have any. I'm not letting anyone come after them, so no, no danger."

Randy was watching him, that tiny frown still formed on her features. "How chivalrous of him to stick by her and dip his cock in another chick. You make excuses for him. I don't think fucking around on your wife and mother of your kid is anywhere on a politician's job description. But I get it, he's your big brother. He's just making Matty look a Saint right now. If he did half of the things your brother did, I would staple his penis to his motorcycle and drive him from here to Alaska and back... naked. Him, not me. And that would just be the start. You need to stop with the self blame about hurting him, too. Don't you think he hurt you enough in return to even the scales out there? It's not like you killed him. Or is it like you intended to hurt him. Do you still blame me for hitting you with the car?" she asked, watching him intently. She couldn't help but rub her hand over her flat stomach. Everything with Mel had left her so confused and she knew there was some sort of twin mojo at play here. Maybe it was just sibling rivalry? Not that she or Mel had ever had that towards each other in the past. It had never been an issue. "I don't know... I think I'm just getting swept up in Mel's stuff by default. I've never thought about kids before. It just sort of suddenly hit me like a big stick to the face or something."

Peter let out a slow breath, and nodded in agreement before he rest his head back down against her shoulder and took comfort from her being there. She was right. She was voicing everything he'd been thinking over the years, but had never let himself admit to. Not to mention those times Nathan had doubted him, or ignored him. It wasn't that Peter hated his brother, he didn't. He couldn't. He had just managed to knock Nathan off the pedestal so that he could live his own life, and not try and live his brother's. "No, of course I don't still blame you for that. It wasn't intentional. I had never wanted Nathan to be there with me. I guess maybe I feel a little guilty because I'm not sure I could have survived without him. How fucked up is that? I might not have even got out of New York in time. I could have destroyed a whole city, not just my brother's face." Peter placed his hand back on her stomach, rubbing his thumb against the smooth skin. "I want one," he murmured, the realisation hitting him just like a big stick to the face. "I want ours."

"Isn't that what family are really supposed to be for? To protect you, through the good, bad and ugly? You surviving because of him doesn't make him a Saint, it makes him your brother. At least he stepped up when it mattered, even if he didn't step up for you much at all any other time. He's a politician, he's not out saving lives, like you. He's not finding cures for diseases, or protecting endangered species. He's not sheltering abused children, or funding rescue missions for war. Is he? He just likes the fucking sound of his own voice and looking pretty in suits. Peter, you're better than him. You've always been better than him. You want to make a difference how it counts. Not how many people can get their cheque books out for your campaign at a cute little speech about having a fucked up brother..." Randy stopped and let out a heavy breath. She hoped she never met Peter's brother. If she did, he would be getting a free up-close view of his own colon and anus. She turned back at him, uncertainty written all over her face. "What about everything we've worked for? I want to be a psychologist. I want to help people, just like you have. I want to make a difference too."

Peter kissed her neck, and his hand slid lower as he gave her hip an affectionate rub, and trailed his fingers over her thigh. It probably wasn't supposed to turn him on hearing her berate his brother, but it did. No other woman had understood. No other woman had really wanted to. They took pity on him, or ignored his life in favour of... Well, he didn't even know what it had been in favour of. Loving the poor, misunderstood Petrelli brother without first finding out why he'd been misunderstood. "I really do love you, you know. And I want to thank you for... being you." He shifted back up so his head was on the pillow and he could hold her gaze easily. "I don't see why having a kid would need to change that. I love being a nurse, but it's not like I couldn't cut back the hours if you wanted to be the one to focus on your work. I've never had a reason not to work. I think having a kid would make me stop - at least for a little while - for the right reasons. We'd be in it together. We'd work out a way for us to get what we want."

"You don't have to thank me. You just need to know I love you and you're never going to play second to anyone around here. In fact, I want you to play equal all around. I want you to be part of our family, to be mates with Nathan because I think he's going to need one. And just... be you, without thinking you should be anyone else. You is better than you'll ever see," Randy murmured and she was wetting her lips before moving on to bite on her lip like she always did when she was swirling things over in her head to try and make sense of them. Like when Mel had told her she was pregnant, she did keep her cool as much as she could, but once Mel was safely back with Nathan to try and deal with it all, Randy had exploded in a fit of random thoughts, trying to figure out exactly how she felt that her twin was having a baby. It made for many hours or staring into space, making her feel everything from weird to bursting proud to the thought of being an aunty. But she wasn't in the hot seat then, and now here she was seriously contemplating the thought of doing so. With Peter. "I just... um... I think I need some time to get used to the idea. Like, if we just dove in and did this, I can guarantee I'll freak out about it and it will be a big mess. I can deal with other peoples brains, no hassle, but when it comes to mine, it's like shoving it into a blender without the lid."

Peter pulled her into a kiss, using actions instead of words to make her understand just how grateful he was to her for wanting him to be equal and part of her family. "I want to be friends with Nathan, too," he said eventually. "I like him, he's a good guy. And he knows what it's like to be in love with a Murray twin. We have plenty to bond over. You deserve to first too, you know. You're amazing." He kept his gaze on her as he watched her bite her lip, figuring she was turning things over in her mind and that was okay. "I don't want you to freak out, or anything. I get that you have a blender brain. Mel has the washing machine, and you got the blender. I still don't really know what I got. We'll stick with condoms, and birth control, and the baby thing goes on the back burner."

Randy curled into the embrace again, for some reason, feeling a wave of vulnerability washing over her and she was happy to be shielded from it by Peter's arms. It wasn't a familiar feeling for her, she was usually the confident one and took things in her stride. She wrote it off as just tapping into Mel's hormonal mojo again. She promised her twin she would be there every step of the way for the pregnancy, this really just wasn't what she meant when she said it. "Condoms and birth control. I can do that. And I promise I will think about it. I'm not just saying that to fob it off, because I'm not sure I can just fob it off. It's weird. It's like... it's just consuming me. I thought it was just sibling rivalry, but Mel and me, we've never had that. Ever. I'm not jealous of her. I just want to feel what she's feeling. I think maybe I already am." She moaned a little. "I told you the twin thing was mental."

"It's still cute, and amazing, and something that definitely makes my head spin but I wouldn't have you without it." Peter rolled onto his back as he pulled Randy on top of him, and wrapped his arm around her waist as he used his other hand to brush her hair back from her face. "God, you're beautiful. I'll let you think about it in that blender brain of yours for as long as you need to take, okay? No pressure. Mostly because I need to think about it, too. I really hadn't been expecting the kid talk, but I'm glad we had it."

Randy buried her face in against his shoulder and sighed. "I'm sorry I just dumped it on you like that. I didn't mean to. I actually wasn't going to say anything at all, but I really was starting to go nuts with it. I thought it was just a phase. I've had phases before. I was impressed, though, with the condom thing. You didn't even make a mess, even if I was launching something like that at you. Maybe now I've got it out there, I'll get over it. I don't even think I should tell Mel, because I don't want to freak her out. She was all happy in a good mood because she got her first real, meaningful Valentine's Day present, and she deserves it. She's starting to get used to the pregnant thing too. She doesn't need me going crazy twin on her."

"You're not that crazy of a twin," Peter told her with a smile before he chuckled. "And I'm glad you told me. I'm also kinda impressed I really did take it in my stride. Truth is I've dealt with much, much worse things than you telling me you want a baby. I still think you'd be a sexy pregnant chick and I'm not just saying that. Idea of you with a baby bump is kind of turning me on. Feel free to hate me. I'm not sure it is something you should keep from your sister. Won't she pick up on blender vibes?" Then Peter seemed to pale a little. "Oh, shit... Valentine's."

Randy shook her head. "No, no. Don't worry about it. You've been really busy, we both have. I completely understand. Things have just been all over the place. I'm not one of those chicks who gets homocidal about Valentine's Day. We can go out to dinner or something when you've had some rest." She looked at him uncertainly. "Really? You don't think it'll be all weird and awkward?" she asked, still trying to figure out how it would feel to have a beach ball strapped to her front.

Peter smirked lightly. "I can do dinner. Just give me tomorrow. I might be human by dinnertime. I'll find somewhere nice. Somewhere that isn't just a burger joint. Might even have metal cutlery." He nodded. "Yeah. I mean, of course it'll be weird and awkward, but it'll be... intense. At least if you don't get turned off by sex. Some chicks just don't want to be touched for the duration of the pregnancy."

Randy's mouth dropped open a little. "No!" she gasped and lifted her head to see if he was joking. "Are you serious? Not at all? What's the fun in that? No... I don't want no sex. I don't think I could handle it. You've got to have some fun amongst all the expanding boobs and throwing up and sore butts and wanting to eat weird things and... how is it that the guy isn't the one that gets turned off?" she asked in realisation. "Pregnancy doesn't even sound sexy."

Peter managed to keep his face straight before he started to grin. "Deadly serious, babe. But I just said some. I'm hoping you live up to your name and don't cut me off. I don't know why guys don't get turned off, but mostly I think it's because we're just so deeply in love with our girls, and proud our sperm did something useful. Ask Nathan? It's not sexy, but it's natural."

Randy was starting to look slightly horrified. "I don't think I want to deal with any of those pregnant things. They sound awful. Feeling sick all the time and peeing all the time and hemorrhoids and not being able to lie on my stomach and sore boobs." She was biting on her lip again. "There is no way you will want to even touch me with any of that. What if I start doing inelegant things like farting when I bend over or throwing up when I smell your cologne?"

"Having a baby really isn't all clean and glamorous," Peter conceded. "But I'll still want to touch you. I'll always want to touch you. I won't stand behind you when you bend over, and I'll stop wearing cologne. It's not going to bother me. Promise."

Randy rested her head back down onto the pillow, falling into silence again. She knew she had commiserated to Mel that day in the supermarket when she had first started seeing Peter that she was embarrassed about the everyday things like using the bathroom at his place. She wasn't mental about it, but she had always been one of those girls who got along with guys like a house on fire, but when it came to personal stuff like that, she rarely let them close enough to experience that with her. She was always the perfect girlfriend who never let the guy have a chance to even think about her in those positions. But with Peter, it was different. It was getting serious. Baby talk was really serious. More than serious. It was going to be a whole new learning curve for her to allow herself to let her guard down with him, especially if she got pregnant. He would be there through all those inelegant things with her, and it was scaring her a little. "I-I'll think about it," she murmured, realising she was a little envious of Mel right now who had faced all this full on like a bull at a gate with Nathan, and they got through it just fine.

musebysentence | 50.2 Justify

2010-01-31T23:23:09Z

Peter shouldn't have had to try and justify to himself why he needed to get away, let alone anyone else.

musesandlyrics | 5.14 Dangerous Liasions Quote

2010-01-31T09:03:54Z

5.14. "And it's not that I want to have you. All I want is to deserve you."
Dangerous Liasons

Co-written with randybyname
[Follows THIS]

Peter swept his hand down Randy's bare back as he lay next to her on the bed and smiled. Truth was she was beautiful all the time, but he really did think she was gorgeous covered in a post-coital glow. They'd made it a little way up the hall before he followed through on the hallway sex, then they'd taken a short break while Peter found something to eat, and Randy spoke to her sister. He hadn't wanted to pry too much, but she seemed content to relay what was going on. He still couldn't quite believe Mel had fallen pregnant, and it did make him wonder what it would be like to have a kid with Randy.

His fingers traced patterns on her lower back, dipping down to touch the soft curve of her ass as he leaned forward to press a kiss against her shoulder and went back to watching her. Their sexual activities had picked up like they'd never taken a break, and now they were passed out on the bed. Peter was aware that after a shift and a half he should probably be trying to sleep, but he couldn't. Not since he'd told Randy he'd wanted to talk to her. And he did. He wanted to tell her everything, but he was still trying to work out where to start.

Peter's tongue slipped out to wet his lips, and he cleared his throat. "Remember me telling you about my brother Nathan?"

Randy bit down on her lip. This was it. She promised him she wouldn't let her brain kick into overdrive about it, and she hadn't, but she swore now that not having the outlet of overstressing something to keep a blank brain was much worse. She had touched on it with Mel, and maybe a few stray thoughts had broken through. Then with everything going on with Nathan - Mel's Nathan - and the two blue lines and the fact that it was Mel going to make her an aunty first and not Matt like most thought, it was just surreal and she wasn't sure what she was really supposed to properly think anymore. But he needed to have her full attention, so she tucked Mel's issues close by to the side for the moment. She knew her sister wouldn't mind. She nodded. "The golden haired Petrelli brother who can do no wrong? He's a politician... but you didn't tell me a whole lot more than that. He has kids, that's it, I think," she said with a small frown of thought of her face.

"Yeah, that's him," Peter murmured, slightly amazed that she had actually remembered everything he'd told her. It made him wonder if he'd really told her that little, and so she was filing away any and all little snippets he gave her. "At one point he was running for Congress. His goal, and our mother's, was always the presidency. I was never good enough in that time. Everything I did came under scrutiny if it would be seen as affecting his running, or his image. I was just the annoying kid brother who was a nurse. But I loved him. I've always loved him. Nathan's been my hero since I can remember. Even if occasionally he's been not so shiny." Peter shifted and rolled onto his back as he tucked his arm under his head, and looked up at the ceiling. "I started having these dreams that I could fly. That I was standing on top of a building, and then I was flying. Not falling, flying. There's a difference. Then Nathan started appearing in them, and I didn't really understand what it meant. And then it started to be me saving him. Or I thought I was saving him. Turns out he saved me. Nathan was the one that could fly."

Randy couldn't be sure if his shifting positions was him pulling away from her or not, but she stayed where she was in case he needed space. She became starkly aware of how much she really didn't know him. She wanted to change it, but it seemed he was opposite to Nathan. Mel had admitted Nathan confided in her a lot, opened up from early on in the piece. Peter hadn't really been like that. He talked, but rarely about himself and she could see now how little she knew about him. But now he was talking, and he was telling her his brother could fly. Did she even hear right? She sat up abruptly in bed, tucking the covers around her middle so she had something her hands could do. She had always been a fiddler. At first, she wasn't sure what to say, and being a psychologist, she wanted to actually asked him if he maybe needed therapy. "Fly?" At least it was something. Better than staying silent. Her fingers threaded through the sheets and she looked at him a little nervously.

Peter's free hand went to her leg, and he tilted his head back to look at her as he renewed their physical connected. He hadn't been pulling away, he'd just needed to shift so he could better focus on his memories. Not that he was likely to forget any of this. "Yeah, I know... It's crazy. He actually had me convinced I was crazy. In fact, my Mom came to the hospital after I fell off the building to tell me that apparently our Dad committed suicide, and I'd inherited his mental problems. That I'd tried to kill myself. Nathan spun it a different way at one of his political parties. I was the family joke, the poor brother who had alcohol and mental issues. A secret Nathan was sharing with his public so that they could see what a kind, and considerate person he was caring for someone like me."

Randy just looked at him, horrified, her nose scrunching up in a deeper frown before she could stop it. "Your mom and your brother used an invented and frankly sad issue as a political yard stick? That's... that sick! There are people really out there with alcohol and mental issues, you know! It's not a bloody damn joke!" It was the psychologist kicking in inside her. He had said enough to assure her those weren't his problems, but the truth was, she would probably be relieved if that had been. "That's not even... I don't even..." She had to hold up her hand and shake her head before she started swearing harshly and verbally abusing his family.

Peter pulled himself up into a sitting position next to her and pulled her into his arms. She had been able to express the anger where he had failed. He'd yelled at his brother that night, and stormed off, but it wasn't the same. It was also the night he'd finally kissed Simone, but he didn't want to dwell on that. "Welcome the Petrelli family," he murmured. And he wasn't even near done yet. "These dreams... The flying, I knew it had been real. Nathan had flown even if he wanted to deny it. And it turned out I shared his power. I could share anyone's ability. We weren't the only special people. There were others. Evolution had taken a jump. There was something in us that made us extraordinary. Of course, later, I found out my mother and all her Company colleagues could actually manufacture the trigger. All of it is very... confusing. I'm not asking you to understand, I just need you to realise there's a reason I don't try and talk about this part of my life very often. It wasn't ever a happy time. Not once I realised that there was a killer after all of us, someone that wanted to collect our powers."

He let out a sigh, and his head fell back against the headboard. "I don't know if you'd even remember, but there had been a rash of killings where people's heads had been cut open and their brains taken out. It was all over the country, not just New York. A weird trail that no one seemed to be able to connect."

"Yeah... no," was Randy's pointless answer. She didn't remember anything like that, and didn't want to, either. It was bad enough that a colleague of her brother's had been shot in a hospital of all places, she didn't want to think about that sort of thing until a victim was sitting in her psych office wanting help to deal with the aftermath. She was hugging herself now, and she really didn't know how she was supposed to take all this talk of super powers and flying and serial killers. It was freaking her the hell out, especially after trying to process the fact Mel was pregnant. But she wanted to at least try to get some part of it. "What, so this dude is coming after you to eat your brains? I think I was happier thinking you were in the Mafia..."

"I really wish I was in the Mafia, baby," Peter admitted as he gave her a sad smile. "And no, not any more. He's... gone. He did used to want to, though. That's how I died. I was tracking down the author of a book on our genetic coding. The abilities, and what it means. I actually have it if you could ever bring yourself to read it. His son was in New York. The author was murdered by the brain guy. By Sylar. At the time I had inherited other abilities including invisibility. Sylar used shattered glass to try and get me because he couldn't see me. I had a shard of glass land right in the back of my skull. In the one spot the invulnerability isn't so invulnerable. That was an ability I got off my niece. My, um, brother's first daughter. The one he thought had died in a fire. She survived, just like she survives everything. She's the reason I'm alive now. I healed after she pulled the glass out. I'm skipping over some stuff because I realise it's going to be confusing as fuck, but let's just say that Sylar killing Claire would have been some seriously bad fucking juju. I had to save her, to save the world."

Randy put her hand up and started to restlessly play with the ends of her hair. "I-I don't know what I'm supposed to say or do..." she admitted in a small voice. Bottom line was, she was kind of terrified right at that moment. More than terrified. She wanted to cry to and go and hide behind her big brother for protection.

Peter cupped his hand against her cheek, his face twisting in pain when he realised that telling her all this was hurting Randy. "Do you understand now why I never wanted to tell you any of this shit? The past year, or so, really has not been a happy time for me. I became a human nuclear bomb, and Nathan flew me up into the atmosphere so I could explode safely, but I hurt him. I got him to hospital only to wind up fucking tasered by a crazy chick and taken to the Company where I was her plaything for four months. Then I lost my memory and woke up in a fucking shipping yard in Ireland." He kissed her forehead, and rest his head against hers as he dropped his voice to a low whisper. "I was trying to protect you by not telling you, because I'm only halfway done, and I'm already hurting you. I know I don't talk a lot about me, but I don't want to make you scared of me, or to make you hate me. I can't lose you because I'm only just letting myself fall in love with you, Miranda Murray. I just know it can't go both ways unless you feel like you can trust me."

"He hurt you!" Randy exploded before she could stop it and then put a hand up over her mouth, horrified. But it was true. Who gave a flying fuck if one was physical hurt one was emotional? As far as she was concerned, the long-standing hurt Peter's brother had caused him was way worse than some one off accident, even if it was playing out in her head like some weird movie she wasn't sure she was supposed to like or not, but really had a crush on the leading dude. "I'm not scared of you, I'm scared of all them! Are you telling me they're still after you, or whatever? Okay, so super powers. No, I don't understand it, and it's maybe really making my head feel like a squashed oyster right now, but I don't care, just so long as you aren't flying up to the ozone layer to move the bloody earth to the left or whatever people like you need to do! Can't you retire? Even James Bond gets to retire at some point. And Superman. He gets to be Clark Kent and run around pulling strip shows in phone booths and- what?" she suddenly stopped short, eyes wide as she blinked at him in surprise.

Peter combed his fingers through her hair as he watched her, and tucked some of the strands behind her ear as he smirked a little. "You caught that last bit, huh? I was trying to sneak it in between everything else. And okay, I agree about my brother. He's notched up a few other betrayals along the way. I think my favourite is still picking my fucked up father, and his plan to basically take over the world, over me." He moved so he could sit facing her, and pulled her up into his lap easily so that she was perched on top of him, and Peter could look up at her. "I am retired, don't you get it? That's why I'm in Princeton. That's why I've left it all behind, left New York, and my brother behind. I don't want that life. I want a life with you, and a life where I'm actually happy. You make me happy."

"Does that mean they stop coming after you?" Randy asked, her eyes locked on his. She pressed her lips together, still feeling overwhelmed. "Today has been epic, my stomach feels like it's in knots. Princeton isn't that far away from New York. Are you even safe? Am I safe? Is my family safe? My sister is having a baby! She needs to be safe! How can I even be enough after you've had all that sort of stuff in your life? That you're this... person, with something I don't understand. What if I never understand it?"

"Yeah, it does. I don't matter to them any more." He rubbed her stomach, and kissed her chest. "I would never put you in a position where you were in danger. I would never do that to your family. If anyone tries to hurt you, or them, I will kill them." He frowned, and snorted. "Randy, you're enough. Trust me on that. I didn't even realise you were what I needed until I found you. You've been this breath of fresh air, and I can't get enough. I'm still human. I'm still... me. I'm just Peter Petrelli. But I can't answer that question, only you can. If you can't take me as I am, then... there's nothing to understand, and we're on limited time." He glanced over at her bedroom window, and then looked back at her. "Do you trust me?"

Randy tucked her hand over Peter's, not answering straight away. She knew the answer, she just needed to process it all in her mind. She wasn't sure she would actually ever understand what he had just told her, but that didn't mean she didn't trust him. If he was still part of that other world, she wasn't sure she could trust him just because didn't trust what he was dealing with. But he was here, he had been here without incident for a few months now. In fact, the only incident was her hitting him with her car. Something suddenly dawned on her. "Why didn't you heal yourself with the powers or whatever when I hit you?" she asked in confusion. She put her hand over his mouth briefly. "Yes, I trust you," she promised.

Peter kissed her fingers, and smiled. "Because I'm just me. I don't have them any more. Not like that. My father took it all away. I injected myself with their version of a... genetic booster," Peter explained as he tried to find the right words, "and I can't have any power unless I touch the person that has it. Not like before when I could have everyone's by only just being near them. Last person I touched was my brother. So I can still fly. I just don't." He pulled her in for a kiss, trying like hell to put everything he was feeling, and everything she needed to understand into it. When it eased off his was looking at her again, his eyes studying hers. "So if you ever think you can handle me showing you, I can... I could give you the stars, Randy. But if you don't want them, then all I got left is me, and for once I would just like that to be enough for someone."

Randy had her hand on her stomach, trying to get it to stop doing sommersaults. "You don't need it to just be enough. You deserve so much better than that. Why should you just be enough for someone? You should be someone's world. Someone's want and need. To give someone a reason to come home each day. To maybe not always be perfect, but at least be fun..." She searched his eyes. "I want you to be my world."

This time it was Peter's turn to blink in surprise. He felt his mouth fall open for a moment before he smiled, and held her tightly, his hand rubbing against her back. "And I want you to be my world. I want us to be each other's worlds. Are you okay? Do you need something?"

"I need time to wrap my head around everything you tell me, so if I go into weird silences, it's not you," Randy had to warn. "Because it's just full on, and after my day, I feel a little like I've been smashed in the face with a dead bush or something. Not only is Mel knocked up, but they've also both got the gastro, which I think they got off Matty. Everything feels like it's fucked, so I just need you to be you, because I can handle that. I really, really can."

Peter pulled her into an embrace and kissed her temple. "That I can do. And I'm sorry if I hit you in the face with a dead bush. I need to work on my timing more."

"I'd rather bad timing than no timing at all," Randy murmured, happily melting into the embrace to try and pretend the rest of the world didn't exist for just a short time.

musebysentence | 47.3 Gamble

2010-01-26T21:22:15Z

He just hoped it paid off.

musesandlyrics | 5.3 Diana Quote

2010-01-14T08:37:47Z

5.3. "Yes, I do touch. I believe that everyone needs that."
Diana, Princess of Wales

Co-written with chasemd | Afraid to Run 'verse

Peter rolled over, his arm hitting a warm body. It took his mind a moment as it started to wake up to realise he wasn't alone, and he wasn't actually in his own bed. He was back in Princeton after making the drive again when he found out he and Chase's days off matched. They were just going to hang out, but soon they had found themselves caught in a hungry embrace, and getting hot and heated on the sofa. Things were moved into the bedroom, the two of them only stopping briefly to eat, or snooze between rounds. Peter actually couldn't remember the last time he'd spend all night having unbelievably hot sex, and he didn't really care to.

Things with Chase didn't need to be analysed. He was happy just to enjoy them, even if he wasn't entirely sure they were dating, or not. This was only their second time in bed, but he was already starting to get an appetite for it.

He moved, hand rubbing against Chase's side as he pressed a kiss against the other man's throat. His body was starting to stir, the blood flow rushing south as it usually did in the morning, and he indulged in a brief moment of rubbing himself up against Chase with a soft groan. God, Chase's body felt good up against his. He'd be happy to spend another day not moving from the bed, but eventually he'd have to go back to New York.

After Cameron walked out of his life and Peter walked in, Chase had been making a concerted effort to try and not analyse anything either. It was healthier for his head that way, taking each day as it came and just focusing on his job and this new... thing with Peter. They had been good mates until it accidentally turned into something else one night. Chase didn't feel guilty. If there was a slight hint of it, he didn't let himself linger on it. It was time for a fresh start, and with that, he even decided to head out and get his hair cut. He was passing the hairdressers one day and just walked in and did it without thinking much. Bloody House joking that Cameron got his hair in the divorce was slightly irritating, but for House, 'slightly irritating' was nothing and Chase offered nothing more than a glare in return. That was how he and House operated. It was where Chase was the most comfortable, and he realised recently, where he was most happy. He loved Diagnostics. He had spent the last three years fooling himself about that, and fooling himself that everything was going to be peachy with Cameron. Maybe now, he was where he was supposed to be.

He cracked his eyes open a little with a small grunt at being woken. It took him a couple of moments to get his bearings too. "Hm, 'lo," he greeted Peter sleepily, grabbing his hand and melting back into the embrace they had. This whole thing was going to be interesting. No one at PPTH - save for Wilson - knew Chase was bisexual. Cameron hadn't even known, and now here he was sharing his bed with a guy. For some reason, Chase couldn't really be all that bothered by the turn of events.

"Hey," Peter croaked, his throat a little tender from head. Not that he minded. Fuck, he'd go down on Chase every hour, on the hour if he could. He nuzzled into the crook of Chase's neck, and breathed in deep, memorising the doctor's scent. His brother had always known he was bisexual, but Peter hadn't shared it with anyone else. Even his mother. Who would have known what the Petrelli matriarch would have done with that little nugget? She had always hated the fact he'd been a nurse, a male nurse liking boys would have given her a heart attack. Only he wasn't ashamed of it, not really. Peter had always just tried to be a private person. Heaven forbid he did anything to mess up his brother's political career. He was already the little brother with the drug habit thanks to Nathan's lie at one of his campaign parties. "S'nice," he added in a murmur a long moment later.

Chase gave a slight nod, reluctant to move much. With their recent case signed off, he had the day off again and it was tempting really not to move. "Tis," he agreed, his face still squished against the pillow. He missed this feeling of being tangled up with someone and pretending the rest of the world didn't exist beyond the borders of the bedroom. He couldn't remember the last time he did this with Cameron. There was always something else to do. He cleared his throat and wet his lips, intending to make an attempt to move, but just remained in the same position and pulled Peter's arm more securely around him. "M'thinking of redecorating... or moving," he admitted, opening his eyes again to glance at Peter.

Peter moved his head to look back at Chase, his eyebrows raised a little. "Yeah? Why's..." He shut his mouth as he made a noise. "It's hers. Can't really blame you. Need to be somewhere comfortable." Peter smirked a little, sliding his leg between Chase's as he rubbed himself against him again. "M'already somewhere comfortable, so don't get another bed. Can just get new sheets."

Chase scrunched his nose up with a small snort. "It's all hers. She picked all this, I just went along with it. I'm realising now how much it's not me. There's too much... floral and... ruffles. I'm starting to feel like I should be throwing tea parties and using doilies. The bed is actually mine. Just tainted with feminism." He groaned softly and pushed his fingers through his freshly cropped hair. "I don't want to move today. I'm a lazy bastard, but I don't care."

Peter chuckled low in his throat and propped himself up on his hand as he braced his elbow against the pillow to look at Chase. "I thought there was something off about the place, but I didn't want to say. I mean, you might have been a doilie guy as well as a Superman boxers guy. I'm glad you're not, just between you and me." His arm squeezed Chase lightly, and he smiled. "Have I mentioned how much I like your hair? It's a good change. As for being a lazy bastard, I don't blame you. I'm not looking forward to moving."

Chase nodded. "We were only married three months, believe it or not. Before that... I'd only been living with her, what, three months at the most. We were only engaged a month before we got married. I know... I know. You don't need to react to that. It was stupid. I can see how fucking stupid it was now. I figured after she strung me along for so long, it was like ripping a band-aid off. That things would get happier, you know?" He snorted softly again. "But without all that, I wouldn't have been pissed and nearly killed myself in New York, or here right now."

"Everything happens for a reason," Peter murmured. He dipped his head to kiss Chase, letting it linger for a moment. "I wish I could say I want things to have been different for you, but I don't. If it had never happened we probably never would have met, and that would just be a crying shame. You've reminded me what I like about being with a guy, and just how good sex is. If it's alright with you, I'm totally okay with fucking every last trace of her out of you. Repeatedly."

Chase smirked a little. "I appreciate it, love. I'm putting it all down to a learning experience, and now I know to never, ever fucking make the same mistakes in my life again. I've learnt if a relationship sucks from the start, it really isn't going to get better, and that there is no reason I need to just settle because of my own insecurities. Look, I'm my own shrink. Who needs to pay three hundred bucks an hour for one?" He laughed and looked at Peter in amusement, eyebrow raised. "Ever been with a guy for longer than a few nights here and there?" he asked.

Peter grinned a little at hearing the pet name, not even minding Chase using it. "You're welcome. And hey, it's important to look at what you can learn from something. It's easy to get caught up in the emotional side, but if we can't take something away from the shit, then it really is just tragedy. Also, the relationship sucking thing is a very, very important lesson. You definitely need to be paying for a shrink. I'm very impressed. Most people can't even help others with problems, let alone solve their own." Peter's smile turned crooked, and he arched his own eyebrow. "Yeah, I have. A couple months actually. It was a long time ago, and it hasn't really happened since. In the end the same thing happens that always happens... He, ah, died in a car crash. Was coming back from a college party out at some secret location. I hadn't gone because I was studying for a test the next day. I didn't even find out until someone asked me about it a couple days later. I just assumed he'd hibernated from a hangover."

Chase turned so he could see Peter's face better, a small frown on his face now. "Fuck, I'm sorry. I can't even imagine how that must have been, especially in college. You tend to deal with a lot of shit going on in college. Is that why you didn't hook up with anymore blokes? You have mentioned a few things with females. I do remember, see?" he added with a small smile, though he was watching Peter closely to make sure he was okay.

"Yeah, I see," Peter replied. He moved his arm from around Chase's waist, and reached up to touch his fingers to the short strands of hair. "I think it just started a trend. Nothing's ever lasted long for me. Everytime I feel really close to someone, something just happens to them. And I'm not saying it's me. I mean, what kind of bullshit theory would that be? I'm just... cautious. Doesn't matter if they're a guy, or girl. It's not really why I hooked up with anymore blokes, but it was probably a subconscious thing. I just waited until I felt something strong with someone..." He shrugged his shoulder. "I don't know. My love life is just... sporadic."

Chase enjoyed the touches, letting his eyes fall closed with a small smirk. "My boss asked if my ex got my hair in the divorce. Bastard," he said, enjoying the fact they had just melted back into the easy embrace again without much thought. "Your Mum and your brother," he guessed. "It had to have been a thought in your mind to come out when he was in such a public place and your Mum wanting everything pristine and perfect. But I get it, I do. Same with my Dad. He knew, but he pretended it didn't exist. Told me I would grow out of the phase. And they wonder why I moved to England to join the Seminary."

Peter smirked. "Well, it is just a little bit funny. At least she didn't get the bed." Peter's head came to rest back on the pillow and he sighed. "You already know my family so well. I hope you don't think I'm ashamed of you when I say I'm planning on at least keeping you away from my mother for as long as I can. But you're right. That was something in the back of my mind. I'm still trying to imagine you in the Seminary. This would never have happened if you were still there, and a priest."

"I fucking love this bed. No way was she getting it. I don't even know what she's going to want to take in the divorce. She left with one suitcase and a few things in the back of her car. To be honest, she can have it all. I don't need any of it. Most of the newer stuff around the place are wedding gifts, and I'm not all that attached to any of it. I'd gladly go back to how I was before I moved in. At least I mostly knew who I was then," Chase said, only realising the words were true as they came out of his mouth. "That's okay, I really don't want to meet her, and I hope that's not offensive to you. I'd probably say something you would regret even putting me in her presence. Aussies aren't exactly backwards in coming forwards and we can be quite... dry. This is true, and ironically, the guy I killed put it well. He said that priests are good people, but when his two sisters were dying, it wasn't more priests he wanted." He shook his head, falling silent and realising he hated that Dibala was right about something.

Peter watched Chase quietly, and kissed his shoulder. "I can understand his point. And even the cruelest of people can make good points. Like my mother. She can be a real bitch, but she has made a couple of good points in her life. And occasionally comes through. I'm actually struggling to remember anything she said with priests, although she did make a comment that she liked it when we went to church as a family."

"I think I liked sex too much to become a priest," Chase joked, letting his hands trail down Peter's back. "Was that all you did as a family? I'm only asking because it was about all we did as a family for years. Dad was always busy, it was Mum and me mostly. Dad being busy fucking around on her, I later discovered. It makes me wonder if sometimes some parents should get an expiry date. They give birth to you, raise you, then before they can fuck you over, get replaced with pod people who actually give a shit."

Peter hummed with contentment. "I'm certainly not complaining about that. Definitely my gain," he added with a smirk. "Yeah, pretty much. Aside from host social gatherings for the rich and petty. I know I shouldn't complain about being brought up in a well off family, but the song's right. Money can't buy me love. Nathan and me were always close, but me and my parents? Not so much. Things weren't always great, and they definitely dipped once Dad died. I really could have used pod people parents. Makes me wonder what things would have been like."

Chase nodded. "Yeah, I really wouldn't be who I am today, that's for sure. I doubt I would be in America, either. I came here to piss my father off, it was just lucky I got the awesome opportunity to go with it. He tried to call all the shots with my career, and initially I let him do it. I let him waver me on what speciality I wanted to do, I let him pull strings for my internship. I hated every minute of it, but I let him because I figured he was at least interested in something I was doing. It wasn't that, though. He just wanted to keep me under the thumb so I wasn't running around tainting his name. Like your brother being a politician, my father was an internationally known physician. He wanted me to be a carbon copy of him. It sucked, just made me want to do my own thing even more."

"Maybe that's one good thing our parents did give us... A strong sense of wanting to do our own thing." Peter's hand brushed down Chase's side, and he rubbed it against the curve of Chase's ass. "I know both of our childhoods sucked, but I'm glad we found our way here. To whatever this is anyway," he chuckled. "I'm not trying to put a name to it yet since I'm happy just to roll with it. Naming things might lead to trouble, anyway. I missed you while I was back in New York. Most of the time I actually can't stop thinking about you."

Chased laughed and nodded. "Yeah, you're probably right there. Not when labels like ex-wife and divorce and murderer are hanging over my head," he said with a small, tired groan. "I remember when life was easy, no complications. I was free and innocent. Now it's like I hibernated for a few months, then woke up in a gigantic Truman Show where some higher power has completely screwed my Atlantis up, only, I know I did that all on my own. The only difference is having met you. You gave me something to actually see at the end of the tunnel of shit, something that I've really been enjoying and made me feel less like the toe fungus of humanity." He smiled, looking over Peter's face. "I missed you too."

Peter licked his lips as he smirked. "You know, you're a really sexy toe fungus of humanity. Just saying." He caught Chase's lips in a kiss, this one a little rougher than the one he stole earlier. "Gotta admit I like this waking up next to you thing."

Chase laughed against Peter's lips before kissing him back, letting it linger. He had absolutely no argument with the comment. Well, the second comment at least. "Shame you work in New York. I could get used to this," he agreed softly before picking the kiss back up where it left off.

"Real shame," Peter admitted. He moved them, placing himself a little more on top as his hands rest on either side of Chase. His tongue pushed into the heated cavern of Chase's mouth, and he started explore the depths. "We'll just have to make good use of the time we do have."

"Sounds like a plan," Chase agreed and matched Peter's actions with the same eagerness. He liked that the other guy made him stop thinking, and after all the thinking he had done lately, he couldn't deny this just felt... right.

Words: 3064

RP Log with musicalmedic, randybyname and timemaychange

2010-01-11T08:23:13Z

[Follows THIS, THIS and THIS]

It was Saturday night, and typically busy at The London bar. Nathan was working, but he was really tired that night and had found himself wondering how the hell he was going to get through the evening when he felt his eyes start to droop when he was setting up song selections and sets before the crowds started to arrive. Luke had spotted him, and after pulling the piss in his typical Aussie way, gave Nathan a Red Bull and told him to take it easy that night. Nathan really appreciated it, and it meant he mostly just had to make sure music was kept on a rotation and he could keep the talking to a minimum. Some nights just ran themselves in a bar like this, and it really had worked out like that.

He was now sitting in the closest booth to his DJ tables so he could go back and forth with ease. Mel was beside him and on the other side of the table, Randy sat with Peter. Both guys kept hush on the fact they had spoken online initially, knowing the girls might get suspicious as to what they spoke about. Nathan would confess to Mel later, it wasn't like he needed to keep secrets from her. He was nursing a bottle of beer, but he had only had a few mouthfuls out of it. He was sure if he let himself onto too much booze, he would end up passing out face down at the table, and that really wasn't the impression he wanted to make on his company or his boss. He stifled another small yawn as he watched a couple pass by their table hand-in-hand, and turned the bottle cap over between his fingers. In an atmosphere like this, his mind kept telling him he should do something with his hands. He wasn't used to 'taking it easy' when he was supposed to be behind the microphone. It hadn't been long since Mel had arrived with Peter and Randy, so they were still in the slightly awkward phase, and Nathan didn't mean to impact on that. He just really could have shy streaks when he wanted to and covered it by drumming softly on the edge of the table to the beat of the song playing.

Mel was almost bouncing in her seat from nerves, and she tried to cross her legs under the table to stop from fidgeting, but that didn't work. She found herself grinning at her sister, and then trying to nod her head at Nathan's forearm, so Randy could try and catch a glimpse of the Gemini tattoo. Holding onto her own beer was also not really stopping Mel from fidgeting, and she found her hand slipping from the table to Nathan's thigh. It was so tempting to molest him again, even if this time he'd be awake. Mel hadn't even told him what she'd done, and wondered if he even had a clue, or really did just think it had been a great dream. She'd managed to clean him up without waking him, curling up against his side again after her talk with Randy. Their mission to talk to their brother tomorrow re-entered her mind, and she frowned a little, still trying to work out what could be wrong with Matt.

Peter slipped his arm around Randy's shoulders, and turned his head to brush a kiss against her temple. Most times he wasn't into public displays of affection, but with the blonde twin he couldn't help himself. Since that day in the hospital she'd come to pick him up, Peter hadn't really been able to keep his hands off her. He had found a myriad of ways to get away with it without it ever becoming anything sexual, not until she gave the go ahead. He smiled at her before looking at Nathan, watching the other man. He knew why the guy was tired, but he wasn't going to say anything. He really didn't need Randy elbowing him in the ribs or worse for talking about her with someone else. "You don't ever do this after a whole shift, do you?" Peter found himself asking. It was hardly a secret anymore that Nathan was both a doctor and a DJ. Work had to be a safe topic, right?

Nathan turned his attentions back to the group with a smile and nodded with a small shrug as he took a sip of his beer. "Yeah, I do on Friday nights. I don't usually work Saturday, so spend a good portion of the day unconscious, then back here Saturday nights. Which are easier in general, because the band plays, I just fill their set breaks. They should have been here tonight, but they're taking a break. Sunday's all mine, then back to work on Monday. It's probably not everyone's idea of a dream schedule, but I don't really see this as work. More like a hobby," he explained and shot Mel a smile, covering her hand with his and linking their fingers together. She hadn't mentioned the flowers, so he had a feeling she hadn't gotten them. Knowing his luck, there had been some sort of mix-up, but he would try and think about it tomorrow. He didn't want to worry right now.

Randy had opted against beer. It wasn't really her drink of choice, instead going for a Martini. She was sipping it when she caught herself crowd watching and analysing, which was something she often did by default, trying to pick out what people were like. It was the psychologist in her. She had been hoping she could corner Lachlan Campbell briefly tonight to ask if he minded meeting with her for one of her assignments, but then Nathan had revealed the band was out for the night so there were no kilts in sight. She was going to have to try and set the meeting up with him some other way. "You're mental," she teased Mel's lover with a laugh. "How can you not want more sleep then you already get? I love my bed. I'd probably commit grievous bodily harm if anyone tried to drag me out of it prematurely." She shot Peter a smirk. He had learnt that lesson the hard way one morning, but she did end up making it up to him by blowing him in the shower once she was conscious again.

Peter chuckled, and gave Randy a soft squeeze. "She's right, she really would. I still have a faint hint of a bruise. I'm lucky I can still use my hand. I got used to not needing much sleep at one stage. I could run on adrenaline, and I was... a quick healer." He wet his lips before swallowing. There was a part of his past he had yet to go over with Randy, and he wondered if he ever would. It was just easier to be normal, average Peter again. Just worry about nursing, and his love life. "I also used to have a lot of dreams... Never could just settle and relax. Things change, though."

Mel didn't argue when Nathan took her hand, and looked down at their joined fingers. She bumped him gently with her shoulder. "No wonder you wanted to sleep most of today away. And there you were talking about DVDs, and hanging out. Not that I'm complaining! Plus you must have stayed awake long enough to send me those flowers. For which I just wanted to say thank you so much. I meant to before, but I got distracted when I first saw you." Mel hadn't been able wrapping her arms around him and stealing a passionate kiss from him. If she was going to stake her claim, she would do it in front of a crowd. "But hey, also not complaining about your hobby. It's a pretty damn cool one to have. As long as you remember to still work some Bowie into your sets occasionally."

Randy watched her sister kissing Nathan for a few moments and then turned to Peter, gesturing with her glass. "I'm the evil twin, you know. You have to give me flowers now or I'll get jealous," she joked and then laughed, giving him a soft nudge before settling comfortably against him in his arms. It was nice to just relax and chill out, especially seeing Mel wasn't behind the guy eight ball for once. Randy really could enjoy herself without feeling guilty Mel was being left out. It was just a natural gene in her to do so. She would never intentionally set Mel up, because they agreed years ago to never do that so it didn't create problems between them, but Mel had done this all on her own. She not only bagged a guy, she bagged a doctor who sent flowers and was blond and gorgeous with a killer smile. She had been hoping Mel would manage to find a guy as awesome as Peter was, and she had. She caught sight of the tattoo on Nathan's arm finally when he reached for his beer. Her heart clenched just a little when she looked at the other guy wrapped in Mel's arms. She couldn't even begin to imagine what it would be like to have Mel die and she teared up before she could stop it, hiding it by putting her glass to her lips and blinking when she looked at the dancing crowd again.

Nathan laughed. He was enjoying the attentions Mel was offering him, trying to keep up with her as much as he could. He had absolutely no complaints in that department, and he realised he was actually starting to get hard in response, and thanked any higher being for the large tables. "I didn't work here Friday night. Luke had a private function, some bachelor party or something. I asked for the night off for the date that didn't happen," he laughed. "Yet still ended up passing out cold. Funny that," he added with a cheeky smirk.

Peter pressed his lips against Randy's ear so that only she could hair him as he gave the other couple some privacy. "I'll get a bunch of flowers tattooed on my ass, and you can see them whenever you want. Those kind of flowers don't wilt, either." He smiled against her hair as he breathed in her scent, and just leaned back in the booth as his thumb rubbed against her shoulder. He still had yet to do any nudging as far as making things official went, but this was a good start. He glanced back at Nathan and Mel, and his smile turned a little sad. It was strange being across from another Nathan, the name doing nothing but making him think about his older brother. "Oh, right... the date. How exactly did that go?" Peter mustered a smirk, and his eye glinted with amusement as he looked at Nathan. If their online chat was going to stay a secret, it meant he could get away with asking for details even when he knew about the sex hangover. "I'm guessing if we're all here together, there was at least enough for more dates."

Mel blushed scarlet before ducking her head against Nathan's shoulder, and bit back a giggle. "Guess maybe I worked you too hard, huh?" She looked Randy, and Peter and smiled. "It went really, really well. I think the date officially ended in time for me to go home and change and come out for this one." Her fingers brushed along his arm, pausing at the tattoo. She glanced at Randy again, trying to read her sister's expression. "I think there's plenty of dates left in us. Don't you?" she asked, turning to look at Nathan. She could feel the washing machine stoke up in her mind again, and tried to stop it.

"Yeah, for sure," Nathan agreed, laughing. "Once I recover from the last one. I still feel like I could sleep for a week. I love my bed too when I can indulge enough to stay in it long enough. But alas, work calls and I have to drag myself out of it to go deal with kids with chicken pox and gastro." He hadn't actually revealed in any way that the time Mel left to go get changed, he had to jerk off in the shower just so he wasn't walking around in a perpetual state of of hardness. Besides not being able to get the thoughts of sex with her out of his mind, there was hints of awesome sex dreams he must have had when he was asleep. It was probably why he felt so tired, his mind had switched off since she had asked him out on the date. He knew his next set was coming to an end and he had to check his listings. He was glad he had opted for dark jeans, because telling his dick to go flacid again wasn't going to work. He gave Mel a kiss and pushed out of the booth. "I'll be right back. Promise."

Randy watched Nathan moved away, and realised the dark jeans weren't enough to hide what the doctor was packing. Her eyebrows shot up and she threw Mel a devious smile in realisation. "Well, part two, certainly seems like you hooked a, uh, big winner there," she offered, her eyes shining mishievously. She turned to Peter and pointed between him and over to where Nathan was now standing. "Why do I get the feeling you two know each other? I thought there would be more awkward. Are you okay, babe? The whole brother name thing?"

Mel wriggled in her seat as she watched Nathan leave, her eyes on his ass, and the dark jeans. She fanned herself as she met Randy's gaze and laughed. "I really did, didn't I? Do you like him? Not that we've talked much yet, but I really hope you like him, part one." Her gaze soon slipped back to the DJ booth, and she bit her lip as she indulged in the thousandth replay of the night before.

Peter looked down at Randy and tried to smile innocently, but failed. He held a hand up in surrender. "Okay, so there might have been some talking online. Not much. Apparently we also came up with the idea of tonight, only you two got to us first. He was, ah... talking about a sex hangover. I didn't realise it was him until he clicked that I was your... 'not boyfriend' as Mel apparently referred to me."

Randy felt like she was suddenly thrust into some sort of spotlight, only she held onto her composure to appear calm on the outside. She looked between them both, sipping her drink, and then her eyes shifted to Nathan in the DJ booth. She was wondering what Mel had told the guy, and what the guy passed onto Peter. She wasn't even sure what a 'not boyfriend' was, let alone what a sex hangover was. She looked at her sister, eyebrow raised. "Sex hangover?" she asked in amusement. But then Nathan was coming back, and if there was going to be a whirl of behind the scenes talking, he wasn't going to get let off the hook either. May as well shove them all into the spotlight, no way was she going to flounder there herself. "What's a sex hangover, Dr Mitchell?" she asked him innocently.

Nathan nearly tripped over his own feet as he got back to the booth and glanced warily at Peter. Wow, they were fast operators. "Still trying to work that one out," he admitted as he slid back into the booth. "Probably something that comes when you're officially dating someone," he added pointedly, glancing at Peter.

Mel's eyes had gone wide as she stared at them all, and tried to work out what the hell had happened. "I..." She could feel all her words catch in her throat, and then she looked at Nathan, staring at him. "Are we officially dating? Did I really give you a sex hangover? I didn't mean to! You were asleep!" Mel bit her lip and held onto her drink tightly.

Peter's eyebrows rose as he didn't miss the pointed comment from Nathan. He did have to give it to the doctor, the man was right. "I figured it was just when you'd had a lot of really awesome sex. And figured it also had to come down to who you were dating. You Murray girls... You're hard for a guy to keep up with once you've drained them. Plus we can't ever get enough. It's an instant addiction." He glanced at Randy, and ran his tongue over his lips. "No way would we want to give you up."

Nathan wondered why he just got pulled into the washing machine when his brain was already tired. Probably still a sex hangover. Why couldn't he just have more sex? Which really was the sex hangover talking. He drank more of his beer, hoping he didn't wake up with a real hangover the next day. It took him a few moments to process the sleep comment and he looked at her, giving her a double take with a laugh. "You didn't mean to what when I was asleep?" he asked her in confusion. "If I did anything embarrassing in my sleep, I apologise now!"

Randy wasn't tired, but even her brain felt like it was functioning on half fuel and she hadn't even had that much to drink. She looked at Peter, clearing her throat. "I thought we already sort of were," she admitted to him, only to realise they had never actually had that conversation and she had become one of those stupid bitches who never actually confirmed or denied anything with the bloke she was sleeping with. Like wanting the cake and eating it too. She smacked herself lightly in the head when the penny dropped. "Things have just been... you know... busy and shit. Fuck."

Mel glanced at Peter, and Randy, but realised they were just as caught up in their own washing machine. She leaned in close to Nathan so that only he could hear, her fingers threading through his as she held his hand to keep contact. "You didn't do anything embarrassing. You were so sexy when you were asleep. And hard. And I... just... helped you out," she murmured, trying to get him to understand with a look and an arch of her eyebrow. "I liked it, though. It was fun. I hope you don't mind. And I'd really like for us to be dating, because I'm already crazy about you. I can't stop thinking about you, especially being with you."

Peter was focused on Randy and used his fingers to tuck some of her hair behind her ear. "So did I, but you never said... Then again, I never asked. So I didn't exactly know where I stood, even if I did meet the brother, and the sister, and have Christmas with you. I like you a lot, Randy. And I'd like to be able to introduce you as my girlfriend, even if things have been... I know... busy and shit." He kissed her forehead, then kissed her lips. "If that's okay with you."

Randy bit down on her lip, a tiny frown appearing on her forehead. "I have a confession to make," she told him, clearing her throat. "I think I told myself that if we didn't talk about it, we would just be okay going along how we did. And it wasn't that I think you were like other guys, because I don't, but I got nervous if I got into a relationship it would take my focus away from my college and I'd start dropping in grades after working really hard to get this far. It was just stupid, I know. But I've just worked really hard, and I know you aren't going to be the sort to demand my attention when I need to study or anything like that." She laughed a little and shook her head. "I'm studying to be a psychologist, but that never seems to stem to my own psychology. You just need to ask Mel, I can be a nutcase."

Nathan immediately flushed a bright red at Mel's admission, looking at her in awe. "You... you..." He waved his hand in the direction of his lower half with a laugh of disbelief. "How did I not wake up?" A girl had never done that to him before, at least not to his knowledge. He had probably never been with any who would really want to bother without reciprocation. "Even if I wasn't... returning the favour?"

Peter pulled Randy closer against him. "Hey, it's cool. You both had to share a gene somewhere," he teased. "I'm sorry you ever assumed I might have made your grades drop. I am find with how things are, I promise. It's just nice to maybe know I'm not just a stress relief. Not that I mind being used as one. You can just love me for my amazing penis, and good looks, but I care about you. And I want you to succeed in college, because I do understand just how hard you worked. And in all honesty, if you didn't have nutcase moments, you wouldn't be human."

Mel nodded at Nathan, still managing to hold his gaze. She hooked her foot around his under the table and smiled shyly. "Yeah, even without you returning the favour. I just... I like watching you." She managed not to let slip that her sister was right about that part, figuring it wasn't time to drop Randy in it again. "I was just slow and steady, and you just took it as part of your dream. I ninja molested you. Is that okay? Because I might do it again. You know... if I'm around when you're asleep. You moaned my name, by the way. It was hot."

Randy waved her hand. "No, no. No no no. I don't mean that. I was just trying to let you know what I was thinking, but that doesn't mean I don't want to. I just... this shit runs in the Murray family like you wouldn't believe. We get possessive of what we work for and kinda get worried something might take it away and jeopardise it. I'm not saying this is you, it's just in general. You..." She laughed, dipping her head a little. "You took me by surprise. I didn't expect you at all, and I really did think that day when you left hospital was some sort of agreement, then I just started to take it for granted, and I'm sorry, I really am. It's official. You braved Matty, that's pretty much the clincher right there," she reassured him.

Nathan put his hand up and pinched his lip, still laughing in embarrassment, feeling his cheeks burn. "Wow. I mean... wow. It's hot in here..." He pressed the back of his hand to his cheeks. He downed the last of his beer and waved for the waiter to get in another round.

Peter grinned. "I braved a drunk Matty, jury's still out on whether or not he'll actually kill me, but I'll brave him again," he told her. "And the surprise is mutual. I'm just as driven in my work, but it's nice to have something to look forward to when we get time together. You've made me remember there's more to life, and that's a huge thing. Just so you know." He caught her lips in a kiss, rubbing his thumb against her cheek.

Mel's eyebrows drew together as she watched Nathan, not sure if she was supposed to start cooling him down, or not. She glanced at Randy to try and get some psychic twin help, but Peter and her sister were caught up in a kiss, and Mel quickly glanced away. "Definitely hot." She tilted her head. "Are you okay, Nate?"

Randy kissed Peter back with a small flip in her gut. It was odd for her to think they had just agreed to be official. It wasn't like she hadn't had boyfriends in the past, but none ever really stuck. Instead she just had a lot of fun with guys she knew, knowing they were there if she wanted some company. She had a lot of male friends, and she was yet to know how Peter would take that yet. They had mostly been holed up in their own little universe while he healed and then she had end of year exams to contend with. Time would probably tell how that all panned out. Most of the guys already knew Matt from high school, so there was never an issue. It was like the big brother always knew Randy would never really settle for dating any of them. But now Peter was in the picture, and to add to Matt's stress, there was now Nathan. Randy fleetingly wondered if they needed to invest in some Valium for the darling big bro and sit him down for a long talk because she just knew from looking that Mel was smitten with Nathan and it seemed to be a reciprocated thing. At this rate, Mel would probably find herself up and aisle and knocked up before Randy even realised she was officially a girlfriend. And this reminded Randy that she had to pull Nathan aside when she had a chance to give him The Twin Threat.

Nathan nodded, swallowing as he wet his lips. He looked back to her, but this time his smile was shy and he pressed his lips together. "I'm sorry. I told you I got the, uh, shy thing." He pointed to his red face. "Proof. Either that, or I'm coming down with something," he joked. "I'll keep the jury out on that. I did get really wet in that rain, and I don't want you to think that you did anything wrong, because you really, really didn't. Not wrong at all. I don't think anyone has ever told me they liked watching me before."

Peter just couldn't stop smiling for a moment, and kissed the top of Randy's head again. It had been ages since he'd been this comfortable with someone, and have even discussed the official side of things. There had always just been this instant jump to love, and Peter was sure it was because he had just been so intense about the relationships, and he hadn't actually considered if they were any good. With Simone it had been infatuation, and then this automatic conclusion that he did love her because he was helping her out. Because he wanted to make her life better. He was wrong... Everything with Isaac should have rung warning bells, but it was too late. Then there was Caitlin, and Peter still wondered how the fuck he was supposed to explain that one. He'd fallen in love with her while he'd had no memories of himself. She was something to cling to in Ireland, how could he be sure it had ever been real love? With Randy he didn't have a ton of questions to answer, or a feeling at the back of his mind like something was off. He just had her, and she was pretty damn fantastic. He looked back at Nathan, and Mel, ready to rejoin the group now he and Randy had had their small interlude to sort things out. Only he caught Nathan's comment, and wondered if he'd picked the wrong moment to rejoin the conversation.

Mel grinned at seeing Nathan blush, and cupped his face with her hands as she kissed both his cheeks. It was nice to meet someone who had a shy streak. It didn't make her feel like such a freak. "Well, I do. And I'd do it again in a heartbeat." She turned her head to find Peter and Randy looking at them, and ducked her head as she smiled sheepishly, and her hands dropped away from Nathan's face. She was definitely starting to feel very taken with Nathan, her heart beating fast in her chest. She still hadn't forgotten the bulge in his dark jeans either, and all the talk about watching him was turning her on. "Hi," she said.

Nathan was sure the temperature sored even more once he realised they had an audience. He had no issues with PDA in any way, but he had a sneaky suspicion they actually heard what he had said about the whole watching thing. When the waiter came back with the next round of drinks, Nathan was relieved of the brief break in conversation and hastily handed over some cash to pay for the drinks. Luke told him not to, but he still did. His conscience wouldn't let him accept freebies when he technically wasn't even working much. He had half the fresh beer downed in one go to cool himself down and then he cleared his throat, able to meet their gaze again, his cheeks still holding a pink tinge. "So, um... busy crowd tonight," he offered, not exactly sure what else he could come up with at that moment that didn't come out in a rush of sexual thoughts.

Randy had been looking back and forth between Nathan and Mel the whole time. It was bloody scary how similar they seemed to be right at that moment. Nathan was bright red, and clearly not sure how he was supposed to feel about having witnesses hear his confession on the subject matter when he was probably still trying to process the fact Mel had felt him up in his sleep. It was sweet, and she wondered if, after all the analysis and brooding about guys, Mel had accidentally just stumbled on her perfect match. And if the way he was hooking into the beer was anything to go by, she could be in for an awesome night of drunk sex, too. Randy laughed, having a brief look around the bar. "Should we talk about the weather next, or sports?"

musebysentence | 44.7 Desire

2010-01-08T23:17:16Z

Even her study face is sexy.

RP Log with chasemd | Christmas With a Mate?

2009-12-26T12:37:36Z

[Follows THIS]

It was after their Christmas dinner, and Peter found himself more than relaxed in Chase's apartment. It should have been strange how quickly he'd just come to make himself at home, but Chase had made it easy. After spending his thirtieth birthday getting pissed, and talking shit, there didn't seem to be anything they didn't mind talking about. And Peter liked that. He wasn't friends with Chase because of weird things going on in his life, or because he was chasing after a murderer. They shared a lot of common ground, and it was just nice to have someone to be with that didn't expect anything of him.

He wasn't Nathan Petrelli's brother. He wasn't a nurse. He wasn't a paramedic. He wasn't the one trying to save the cheerleader, or kill Sylar, or any of that stuff.

With Chase he was just Peter, and he liked it. They'd had a few beers again, and found themselves sprawled on the sofa watching cable porn. The only reason they'd paused on that channel was to laugh at the girl in the elf suit being pounded by a rather well hung and muscly Santa Claus, apparently porn channels even getting in on the Christmas spirit. Only they'd stayed on the channel, and both of them had fallen into a silence as they stared at the screen.

Peter raised his beer bottle to his lips again, taking a sip as he shifted in his seat. His legs were spread wide as he was becoming increasingly aware of just how turned on he was getting. Any minute now he'd be sitting there with a raging boner, and no way to get rid of it. He didn't think their mateship exactly extended to getting off in front of each other. Peter's tongue darted out to wet his lips with that thought. It had been years since he'd been with a guy, but he wasn't foreign to the concept, and Chase was definitely hot. Peter wasn't blind enough not to have noticed.

He turned his head slightly to watch Chase in the flicker of the TV light as the sound of a woman moaning filled his ears. He realised then he wasn't on dangerous ground because he was getting turned on by the sex on screen. He was getting turned on by the possibility of sex with Chase. Only he had no idea if the other guy liked men. It wasn't a topic they'd broached talking about girlfreinds and wives. Peter cleared his throat, and looked back at the screen. "Always preferred the candy cane outfits," he finally said in a low murmur. He wanted to think of something that would give him a way to broach sexuality with Chase, but his mind was quickly becoming a horny blank.

Chase had a half-eaten candy cane hanging out the corner of his mouth. Somewhere in the process, his head had come to be tilted to the side as he watched the way the girl seemed to evaporate vertebrae in her back to bend over the sofa... or Santa's sleigh, whatever it was, in that position. He was kind of jealous he wasn't that flexible. He had a beer in one hand that was resting on his thigh, and he knew he was turned on. He had an old pair of track pants on that were loose, but he was definitely hard. No denying it. It felt like a long time since he had hot sex, not married going-through-the-motions sex. His bedroom activities with Cameron had lost their spark awhile ago, and ended up at nothing in the wake of the Dibala case. Chase just hadn't been in the mood. He was now, though. In fact, he couldn't quite believe how much a fake Santa and an elf with Double Ds were managing to do it this easily for him.

He hummed a little in agreement. "Yeah... no. Personally always preferred leather," he offered as the candy cane dropped from his lips and fell into his lap before he could catch it. "Not whips, leather pants... bras... g-strings... leather pants," he came to and shifted in the seat to quickly adjust himself. "Fuck knows why Santa's doing it for me. I'm gonna blame the beer."

"Leather pants?" Peter repeated, this time very much feeling himself get hard as images of Santa, Chase, and leather pants all swirled around in his head. "I think it's the fact he's more Chippendale than Santa. And he's... well, his definitely packing quite the candy cane." Peter tried to give himself a subtle squeeze to get his erection under control, but it just seemed to make him harder. "You don't normally go for guys?" he finally asked, feeling like his heart was pounding loudly in his ears.

Chase glanced away from the screen at Peter, and then back again. But his eyes were soon on Peter's face again when the question filtered through his tipsy mind. They had very fleetingly touched on this subject when they had been chatting online the day of Peter's birthday. Something to do with being naked that Chase couldn't remember now. They passed it as soon as they landed on it, though, and he realised now it had been a long time since he had been outright asked this question. "Normally, I go for both," he admitted, but there was some slight hesitation in his tone. There was only one person in Princeton who knew, and that was Wilson. An accidentally admission on Chase's part one day when he went to Wilson for basically a friendly ear in the wake of his father's death and nearly losing his medical licence when he killed the patient. Chase often spoke to Wilson these days, when he needed someone to just listen. Wilson never judged. The Dibala thing was something Chase hadn't shared with the Oncologist though. Only Foreman and House knew about that, then Cameron when Chase finally revealed it which was the end of their marriage. This was different, though. Chase hadn't ever even told Cameron he swung both ways, and it wasn't like she ever asked. He was seeing her, so he wasn't out on the pull. It just never came up. In fact, the last time Chase had been with a guy was when he was staying in England.

Peter nodded like he was considering Chase's answer, his eyes fixed on the other man's face. His gaze eventually dropped to Chase's mouth, and he shifted his beer to his other hand so he could reach out and grab the back of Chase's neck as he leaned in to press his lips to the the doctor's. It was soft at first, Peter waiting to see if he was about to be pushed away. Nothing happened at first, so he teased his tongue along the seam of Chase's mouth to part his lips before deepening the kiss.

Chase had initially froze as soon as Peter's lips were against his. It would have been impossible for him to not fight some sort of internal battle, starting with the fact he was still married. Still married and Peter didn't know he was a murderer. Was it long enough after Cameron? Should he wait longer? How long was long enough? How long was too long? He couldn't wallow in his own nearly-divorced misery forever, right? Maybe some sort of... something with a guy was exactly what he needed after all the mess with Cameron? Maybe he did just need to step back and say what the fuck for once? He nearly did push Peter again. He was about two steps from doing so, just out of sheer panic that maybe he had just gotten too far in over his head before he was ready for. But it felt too good, there was no underlying intent behind it. They were both sort of drunk, too. Chase always ended up in unexpected situations when he was drunk, and he still couldn't explain why he spent the duration of his bachelor party carrying around a giant Boxing Kangaroo. It all sort of lost it's shine when he went into anaphylactic shock. He just forced himself to stop thinking before he gave himself a migraine and just kissed back before he could stop and regret it.

Peter turned more towards Chase as the kiss continued, relaxing into it once Chase started to respond. For a moment he was tempted to pull back in case he'd just crossed one line too many. Only it had been needed. He knew Chase was married, and separated, but it didn't bother him. Chase had been yearning for human contact as much as Peter had. They'd both spoken about it. Only when they talked about meeting the right girls it went downhill. Peter hated the idea of having to go out and try and date, Chase just seemed cautious after his marriage fell through. Maybe being with a guy was what they both needed. No expectations, nothing but the friendship they already had with sex. The kiss eased off, and Peter licked his lips as he caught his breath and gazed at Chase. "This doesn't have to be more than sex. Friends with benefits, or whatever they call it now. If you want. I know... I know you're probably not ready for anything more. I'm not even sure I am. I just really need to get laid, and you do it for me," he admitted.

Chase wet his lips and swallowed when the kiss ended. He cleared his throat and was shifting in his seat once again. "This isn't you," he had to say before Peter starting thinking he did something wrong. "It's not even my ex. We're separated, it's not going to reunite. Just a matter of waiting on the divorce. She's moved back to Chicago. It's just... there's things I haven't told you. Big things. And I'm not sure you'd even want anything to do with me if you did know, and if we have sex, it could really complicate the whole walking away thing. Plus, I'm drunk and I'm probably rambling, I have a tendency to do that when I'm still in the phases of being able to form coherent sentences..." He met Peter's gaze and drew in a small breath, letting it out slowly and then taking a long gulp from his beer to wet his throat.

Peter's head fell against the back of the sofa, but his hand was still on Chase. He moved it to cup the man's cheek, before dropping it to his thigh and letting it rest there. It was so easy just to reach out and grab Chase's erection, but Peter managed not to. And even talk of revelations wasn't doing anything to kill his. The porn was still on in the background, and it was all Peter could do not to just rub himself up against Chase. "So tell me. Let it go before it eats you up. Then we'll see where we stand. I'm not sure anything could stop me from.... wanting you. I'm just sorry if I've already made it too complicated. I couldn't help myself."

Chase was staring at Peter, his eyes wide much like a deer caught in headlights. The room was darkened besides the TV, and the flickering light brushed over both of their faces. He felt the beer start to churn sickeningly in his stomach just being face with this dilemma. It was quite a few long moments before he said anything and he threaded his fingers in through his hair so the guilt didn't start eating him up and set him into the realms of a panic attack. "I..." he began, but faltered. He thought it had been difficult telling Cameron, but the thing was, he had known exactly how she would take it. When Dibala had first come in, Cameron had all been gung-ho, kill the bastard, he's evil blah blah. Until Dibala confronted her and she seemed to take a complete about-face on her morals, standing the fucking moral high ground once again. Chase could see now how often she had done that over the years. His own values were never pristine enough for her. But the thing he was faced with now, and why it made is to much harder, was that he had no idea what Peter's morals were. "You'll hate me."

Peter caught Chase's lips up in another heated kiss, his hand gripping at his thigh tightly. Sometimes he never felt like words were enough, and he could see the pain Chase was going through. "Can't be any worse than some of the things I've done," he whispered. "My brother... I nearly killed him. I was why he was scarred, and burned. Why he was stuck in hospital. He shouldn't have been with me, but he was trying to save me just like always. It's never been the same since then."

Chase was still sort of frozen, but it was more like numb. He kissed back automatically, but there was something lost in it. His breathing had become slightly shallow too and he cleared his throat, his eyes locked on Peter's again. "Did you willingly choose to try and kill him?" he asked hoarsely. "Intend to take his life?"

"No, but I have willingly tried to take a life before. I wanted to kill my father. I had the gun in my hand. I... I nearly killed my mother. In order to try and understand a killer, I became one for a brief time." He closed his eyes as he swallowed hard. That time when he had Sylar's ability, Sylar's hunger, it was still hard for him to process. It made him ill thinking about how close he'd come to becoming the man he hated most.

Chase sucked in a breath and when he exhaled, it was shaky. "I killed someone. Knew what I was doing, took a life." There wasn't anything else to say in the wake of it, and the silence felt heavy and claustrophobic. "It's what ended my marriage."

Peter placed his hand back against Chase's cheek, holding his gaze. "You did it for a reason?" he asked quietly. "She didn't agree with what you did."

Chase gave a slight nod, fearing if he smoke immediately, he might throw up. He was getting used to that choked nauseated feeling of late. He swallowed heavily and then put his hand up to brush his fingers across his lips. "An African president. Dictator. He was here a few months ago to speak for the UN. They thought he was poisoned, and he ended up a case for our team. It was full on. Armed guards protecting him, his people trying to infiltrate the hospital to kill him because his government, under his direction, had plans to commit genocide, kill millions, in his country. The opportunity came up, I faked blood results. Took blood from a cadavar in the morgue that had a disease they suspected the guy had. If he was treated for the wrong disease, he would die." He gave the slightest of shrugs, his voice hoarse and barely audible by the time he finished talking.

Peter wet his lips as he listened, and rubbed his thumb against Chase's cheek. "I'm... I'm trying really hard here to come up with a reason to tell you it was wrong. I am. I just, after half fo the shit I've seen recently, I can't tell you that. I wouldn't ever encourage that kind of euthanasia, but you had an opportunity and you took it. I realise how hard this is for you, I do. I'm sorry you have to carry this secret around, but what you did... It's... It's professional suicide, but it wasn't wrong."

Chase put his hand over his face and needed to take a few moments to just push past the horrified feeling he always got when he revisited what he did. When Foreman had asked him if he thought he could take someone's life and have no consequences on himself, he had honestly replied with no. He knew there would be consequences, and there had been. Every day, he woke up with the consequences. "I still... I don't regret what I did. I would probably do it again if faced with the same situation. She wanted to run away, pretend it didn't happen. And even worse, she thought my boss had tainted me so much and turned me into such a unethical bastard that it was his fault I took this course of action. Like, he made me do it. She thought I was turning into him, and I think that just made it all worse. She didn't think I could think or act for myself, wanted to run away and pretend I was broken so she could fix me and nuture her own pristine morals in me." He shook his head. "I'm staying, facing what I did, bearing the consequences. I know what I did, and it'll probably be with me for the rest of my life, but I'm not regretful. The same day it happened, his country was already in peace talks."

Peter ran his fingers through Chase's hair, and pressed his lips together thoughtfully. "Sounds more like you're struggling with the fact your ability to think for yourself got questioned than what you did. Not that I'm downplaying the effect that that would have on you. I just... It sounds like she's more of an issue in all this. That someone made you feel like you weren't yourself, or that you couldn't make your own decisions. That your very being has been questioned. You seem to know exactly where you stand, how you feel. You don't need to doubt it as much as you think. She's just the wrong person for you. She didn't understand, didn't take the time to. And the fact that she so quickly assumed it wasn't something you'd decided for yourself shows how little she really cared. You're not her doll to play with."

Chase was close to tears by now, but he was managing to somehow retain some sliver of composure, even if his eyes were damp. "The story of my life," he said with a humourless, slight laugh. "My father always wanted me to be what he said, what he decided, even right down to my specialty. He was the reason I did medicine, I'm just lucky I ended up liking it. It took me a long time to get my independence, be what I was. It's important to me. I value my own ethics and beliefs, even if no one else does. Oh, yeah, and she was in love with him. My boss. Still not entirely convinced she wasn't when she started dating me. I think she was using me to punish him for not loving her in return. That's not an easy pill to swallow when I put my heart and soul into the relationship to try and make it work."

"I don't hate you," Peter told him quietly. "And for what it's worth I like you just for you. Friend, or... more. I don't want you to be pretend to be something you're not. I'm not asking you to be anything, and I hope you never well. Same as I don't feel expectations from you threatening to swallow me up. I just have to be me around you. It's a luxury I haven't had in a long time. I don't feel so much like I have the weight of the world on my shoulders. I really am sorry she shot everything down so easily, but you said yourself it probably wasn't right to begin with." He brushed his thumb softly under Chase's eye to stop any tears that might appear and leaned in to kiss him softly. "I'm not going anywhere."

Chase nodded just a little and then swallowed again with a small laugh to try and break the tension. He gestured to the TV. "We missed Santa Claus coming to town," he pointed out. He met Peter's eyes again. "Thanks. I'm sorry to dump that all on you, too. Especially on Christmas. I didn't really anticipate us becoming mates after you helped me, but it's been nice to just have someone independent to chat to. It's been awhile. The hospital I work at is like a world all on it's own, it's easy to get sucked into it and forget other things exist beyond it. I have work mates, but I wouldn't exactly call them close buddies. In fact, one of them told me he hated me once. It isn't really like that now. He covered for me, he was my senior at the time it all went down. I'm ready to just put the whole relationship behind me, even if I know I have to still live with the other thing and try to deal with it. Even the priest wouldn't give me absolution. He told me to turn myself in when I went to confession. Not that I expected forgiveness. I was just... desperate. I didn't know how else to cope."

Peter pulled back with a laugh. "Guess we'll just have to wait for inevitable re-run." Peter ran his fingers through his own hair as he gave Chase some personal space back. "I know what you mean. I feel close to people I've shared experiences with, not really work, just... events. But I don't always talk to them. We've all gone our separate ways. Claire's dad was the last of them I spoke to, and it was only because he wanted help. Another favour," Peter added with a shrug. "Even Claire's not someone I especially want to confide in. She's too young. I just want my neice happy and safe. She doesn't need my shit. And hey, don't worry about it. This is what friends are for. I wish I could give you absolution, but I'm no priest. We all fall back on faith when nothing else seems to work."

Chase gave a small snort. "I think a lot of it was hoping God would just give me a break, you know? That ethically, I fucked up, but morally I made a right choice. But the priest isn't God. That's something I should well fucking understand, but I was so screwed up in the days and weeks after it happened. I was a mess. That's when she thought I was having an affair. I couldn't even sleep let alone feel like sex. All I could seem to manage was get drunk, and I realised how stupid that was when I nearly killed myself," he said, throwing Peter another grateful look. "What experiences are you talking about?" he asked, realising Peter was evading things, just not in a bad way. Maybe trying to spare Chase something or other.

"Most of the things I've already mentioned," Peter answered, trying hard to work out how to tell Chase without sounding like he was insane. He did realise how crazy his life would sound to someone else. "People I knew were in danger, and I just felt like I was the only one that could save them. It's how my brother got hurt. How everyone I've ever cared about has been hurt at one time, or another. There was also, um, a time when I had been legally dead. Claire managed to bring me back." It had been a shard of glass to the back of the head, hitting the one spot that was vulnerable to those that healed. She'd pulled it out, and Peter had come back to life. "Then there was the fact I found myself in Ireland without my memory a few months later. More people I knew were in danger... It really hasn't been a safe time for me, or the people I love for a long time. I thought it was finally quietening down, but then I chose to be a paramedic, and now I still spend my days saving people."

Chase listened closely and then nodded, his eyes still locked on Peter's face. "Alright, now fill in the parts you're missing out. I'm a doctor. Someone can't just come back to life after being legally... clinically... dead. Not after a few minutes, or the brain shuts down from lack of blood and you become brain dead. You aren't brain dead. What aren't you telling me?" he coaxed.

Peter rubbed his hand against the back of his head, and cleared his throat as he shifted uncomfortably. "Same way I can pull you out from in front of the traffic and getting you to safety without missing a beat." He got to his feet, and flexed his fingers before he activated the superspeed he still had, and raced into the the kitchen to bring out another two beers from the fridge and bring them back before Chase had much of time to notice he'd been gone. He offered the other man the still ice cold beer. "I'm not like most people."

Chase's mouth was hanging open and he really didn't have the capacity to accept the beer straight away. "I..." He stopped and laughed slightly, rubbing his forehead. "How many beers have I had?"

"Not enough..." Peter responded with a chuckle as he sat back down. The beers were left on the coffee table and he gave Chase a wry smile. "It's a long, long story. And I'm guessing if anyone is about to back out of all this it's you. I'd understand. It's just... Nothing in my life has been the same. I started having these dreams I could fly... And I did. Only after jumping off a building, and my brother caught me. It wasn't me that could fly. It was him. I could absorb any abilities I came into contact with. There's quite a few of us... People that can do different things. Amazing things. Claire heals. That's her power. That's why I survived lived. She's pretty much indestructible."

Chase's elbow had come to rest on his knee while his fingers were threaded into his hair. He was listening and trying to understand, he really was, but it might have been easier if Peter was trying to tell him that Oprah was just Dr Phil in drag. He pushed his fingers further through his hair and came to scratch the back of his head. "I, uh..." he started and then wet his lips, looking at Peter in disbelief. "So, like, um... just... Superman?"

"I guess, yeah. Only not aliens." Peter held up his hand, palm outwards like Chase would be able to see he was human. "Consider me like a DVD with bonus features. I don't know how else to explain. There's just something in our genetics. An extra feature. I'm not trying to break your brain, you asked for the gaps to be filled, and I haven't even started filling all of them." Peter looked down. "Maybe this should just be enough for tonight. I'll, um... I'll get ready to go back to New York. If you want to talk about it when you're ready, you know where to find me."

Chase reached and caught Peter's hand in his before he could move or get up again. "Why are you running away?" he asked.

"I don't want to make your life harder," Peter replied, searching Chase's gaze. "Do you want me to stay?"

"I killed someone, and I'm getting a divorce. Both parents are dead. All my family, what's left of it, live in another country. How can having a friend stay with me on Christmas so I'm not lying here drunk and alone make my life harder?" Chase asked him quietly. "I want you to stay."

Peter gave a nod as he exhaled a slow breath. "Alright, point taken. I just... I don't want to overload your brain anymore. I just... I wanted to be closer to you. But friends don't let each other get drunk alone, right?"

Chase wet his lips. "I'm too drunk to think about consequences," he murmured and then leaned in, catching Peter's lips in another kiss.

Peter froze momentarily, not sure if he should respond, but he was male, and the horniness hadn't faded completely. His hand went to Chase's back and he moved them closer together as he returned the kiss eagerly. He just hoped there wouldn't be too much of a shock the next morning when the alcohol had warn off and they were left with nothing but the consequences.

Words: 4754

just_muse_me | 26.10.4 Sex Pistols lyrics

2009-12-24T08:13:13Z

26.10.4. My Way - Sex Pistols
Regrets I've had a few
But then again, too few to mention
I did what I had to do
I saw it through without exemption
I've planned each charted course
Each careful step along the highway
And more, much more than this
I did it my way

[Co-written with chasemd]

Pre-holiday explosion in the Clinic was always inevitable. Explosion was also the appropriate description, because just about every patient who came through it had one bodily fluid or another exploding from an array of bodily orifices. When Diagnostics failed to bring in a new case that week, Cuddy had everyone - including House - on Clinic Duty to try and dilute the constant stream of patients, a lot of whom were ailing due to overindulgence at Christmas parties with the likes of dehydration or food poisoning. And then there was the typical colds and flus from the wintery weather. Chase was sure his nose was about to start running just from sympathy of the amount of flu cases he had seen and the amount of prescriptions he had written for flu pills.

His feet were starting to ache and he was regretting skipping his morning tea break now and cutting his lunch in half. It helped to keep busy and he didn't feel like sitting in the cafeteria making small talk with colleagues. He wasn't feeling particularly festive in any way, shape or form after everything that had happened in the last couple of months. No one had asked him why he had sutures in his head, though. After belting House, they all probably just thought he got into another brawl with someone who asked how he was, and that was just the way he preferred things to be. The only person who dared to ask him if he was okay was Foreman, and the question was always responded with a succinct 'Fine' from Chase. Both men knew those conversations would always go down like that, and both knew Foreman would never push for more information. Another invite came from Taub for Chase to come for 'Christmas' dinner, even though he was Jewish. This time Chase had just raised an eyebrow at him and Taub back off with a smirk and his hands raised in surrender. Maybe one day Chase would make an effort to become friends with his colleagues, today just wasn't that day.

He pocketed his prescription pad and hung his stethoscope around his neck so he could exit the exam room for what felt like the millionth time that day. The patient was sent off with a script for antibiotics for an STD. He dropped the medical record into the basket for finished cases and picked up the next one from the slot, fighting the urge to yawn and lean against the reception desk for a rest.

After Peter had received Chase's package, the seed was planted. He had thought about it for all of a day before he went to his boss to ask for time off, and was surprised to find it granted without a second thought. Peter had more than proven his worth as a paramedic, and considering the amount of shifts he actually worked, his boss seemed almost relieved that Peter wanted a break. Like they wouldn't be seen as a total slave driver. He also knew he wouldn't exactly be missed in New York. His brother was MIA as it was, no doubt busy with all things political, and Noah Bennett hadn't come looking for him in a little while.

It was what he'd chosen to do with the time off that surprised even him. He knew Dr Chase worked at Princeton Plainsboro Teach Hospital, only the trick was finding him in the sprawling building. He held a couple of cups of coffee in his hands, his courier bag slung across his shoulders. It felt strange walking around the hospital without his paramedic uniform on, or even a pair of scrubs. He was in jeans and a sweater, his dark hair falling in his eyes. It had grown quite a bit over the past few months, no thought to having it short again after Elle's unwanted haircut when he'd been taken into The Company.

He smiled to himself when he spotted Chase at the reception area near what he assumed had to be a clinic of some sort given the amount of patients waiting. He cleared his throat as he dared to walk up to the counter, risking patient anger for stealing a few moments of their doctor's time. He set down one of the coffee cups next to Chase. "You look like you could use this."

Chase nearly wet himself in surprise. In fact, he jumped a little when he was pulled out of his thoughts by a voice that wasn't the receptionist. It would have been a lot cooler if he maintained composure and easily reacted to Peter's presence, but instead, he gaped for a few moments, glancing between Peter's face and the coffee cup on offer. "Oh... hey..." he managed once he stopped blinking in surprise. He cleared his throat and glanced around, eyes momentarily landing on House across the reception desk who was watching the scene with evident interest. Oh great. Chase just knew this would lead to a grilling. Peter wasn't a patient, because he wasn't signing any forms or sitting in the waiting room. He was offering Chase coffee, therefore he knew Chase. Chase really hoped he wouldn't be forced to poke House in the eye or something because anymore interrogations and he was at least going to end up using colourful expletives with his now no longer ex-boss.

But he laughed a little, once again looking at Peter in disbelief and trying not to let his cheeks heat up in embarrassment when he remembered he had sent Peter those paramedic t-shirts as thanks. He had wanted to do something, and when nothing seemed like enough, he went for something light-hearted and amusing instead. The thing was, even if he had often thought about the paramedic since the guy saved his life, Chase hadn't anticipated ever seeing him again. Until now. Now, where Peter was standing in front of him offering him coffee. "You're here... in Princeton," he added pointlessly and then snorted in amusement at his own stupidity and held up his hand. "It's been a long day... long year... sorry. Just hang on a minute." He pointedly ignored House's piercing gaze and flagged down the receptionist, telling her he was going to take his afternoon break. Of course, Foreman then exited another of the exam rooms and merely raised an eyebrow in question at Chase. Chase ignored it, turning back to Peter and finally accepting the coffee. "Want to join me?"

"You noticed that, huh?" Peter had watched Chase's face with amusement, only following his glances briefly. The guy with the cane was someone he'd ask about if the opportunity came up, and the other doctor had to have just been a colleague. Apparently Chase having a visitor was of interest to others, and Peter almost regretted the visit when it hadn't even really started yet. He just hadn't known what else to do. It wasn't like he could rock up Chase's home. He should have called first.

Peter bit his lip in a moment of hesitation before he just smiled again, shrugging off his concerns. He was allowed to make friends, right? Even with people he'd saved, or doctors in other states. He wasn't doing anything wrong. He had nothing to feel guilty, or ashamed about. "Sure. I'm sorry, I didn't mean to interrupt your work. Just took a chance. My timing's not always been great."

Chase shook his head as he turned his back on both House and Foreman. Hopefully the curiosity would eat them both alive. "No, mate, trust me. You're well doing me a favour. I've only taken one fifteen minute break today. You might have bad timing on account of the fact the waiting room is full, but you have no idea just how friggen much I needed a coffee, so cheers. The Clinic has been overrun all week, no need to feel guilty. Pre-Christmas rush and all that. Wankers boozing too much and hurting themselves. Oh wait, no. That was me," he added, throwing Peter a smirk as he took a sip of the coffee. It was like sipping on heaven, almost better than sex. "This is almost better than sex," he decided to verbalise, reassuring Peter he wasn't at all bothered by his visit. In fact, it felt oddly comforting to see the guy again.

Peter had to chuckle as he took a sip of his coffee. It was good coffee, but he wasn't in need of it as much as Chase. "Not sure I'm the one to judge on that comment. It's been... a long time. I can't remember how amazing sex is, let alone if coffee would be better than it, or not." Peter frowned a little in concern, and pointed to his head with his finger. "How's the wound? Sure you're not going to kiss the floor from no breaks?"

Chase's eyebrows shot up at the sex comment and he looked at Peter closely to see if he was joking. "Why? I mean, shit. You don't have to answer that, I don't mean to sound so bloody blunt. But jeez, mate. Seriously? How does someone like you not get a decent and regular lay?" he asked. He couldn't help it, blunt could often be his middle name and now he was just burning with curiosity. Peter far from looked like a gorilla's arse, so it couldn't be that. His hand went up to his head once attention was drawn back to it. "It's healing okay, seem to wake up most days with a bitch of a headache, but I'm better at work right now. Sitting around at home isn't a good idea. I feel okay, just realised how much coffee was needed when you showed up with it, so thanks again. I do appreciate it. But... you can't just tell me you were in the neighbourhood when New York is over two hours drive away."

Peter raised his eyebrows in return, but more because he hadn't quite anticipated Chase's clear shock. Then he just started to look embarrassed, and took another sip of his coffee before rolling his shoulders. "It's fine, I don't really have a problem talking about it. I mean, it's probably something I need to work on. The talking, not the sex," Peter corrected before he frowned, and considered his own words. "Ah, well, sex would be nice to work on, I have to admit. Just... it's been easier to keep to myself. I work a lot." He nodded as he listened to Chase. "Headaches are pretty normal, but then you'd know that. And no, I wasn't in the neighbourhood. You actually inspired me to take a couple of days off. It's been a while, and also, I just wanted to say thanks for the t-shirts. Although, you really didn't have to get me anything. I just wanted to know you were okay."

"Well, I work a lot too, but I always have time for-" Chase stopped abruptly, frowning. He took a sip of the coffee and swallowed it, clearing his throat again. "You know what, that's not a direction this conversation should go at all because it's just bullshit. The last two years mean I have no entitlement to judge on things like casual sex. So just feel free to ignore me on that front. I just... you shouldn't cut yourself off, mate. I can think of a good ten chicks in calling distance right now who would gladly jump into bed with you for a roll." He didn't lead Peter to the busy cafeteria. Knowing his luck, House would follow just for the fuck of it. Instead, he picked one of the ward waiting rooms that only had a handful of people in it. There were some comfortable armchairs by the window, and it was as away from prying eyes as possible. He sunk down into one of them and then pressed his lips together. "I figured you'd probably think something along those lines, but the truth is, there wasn't anything I could have given you that would have been enough to show how grateful I am. The thing is, if you hadn't been there, I probably wouldn't have done much to take care of myself... probably would have ended up just letting fate take it's course. I was in a fucked up head space and the booze was just a bad mix, so I did need to thank you, somehow."

"Are you with someone?" Peter probed gently. He could remember some of the drunken ramblings. Something to do with a woman and sperm, and someone named House. He realised a moment later that it probably wasn't so gentle. For some reason though, Peter just felt the need to clarify Peter's status. "I know I shouldn't cut myself off, but I just... It's hard. I've never been good at casual. I'm kind of all, or nothing, you know? And the last couple times it's been all, and I can't take being close to someone again and watching them get ripped away from me." He let out a sigh, and made a face. "Sorry, man. Shouldn't be dumping this on you. Hey, it's fine, really. Just doing my job. I can't exactly stand around and watch someone get hit by a car." Peter reached out to give Chase's arm a squeeze. "You're welcome, by the way."

Chase was silent as he looked out the window for a few moments. When he turned back to Peter, his posture had slumped just a little and he shook his head, swallowing to wet his throat. "No. Not anymore. I'm, uh... I'm getting a divorce. It lasted six months. It was probably doomed from the start," he had to admit. "There were a lot of external factors at play, including why I shouldn't push you just to go out and have sex for the sake of it. It's how it all started. It was hardly romantic. Before that, it might seem strange, but I understand exactly what you're saying. I was scared of losing people. It was probably why I stupidly pushed too hard to try and make it work with her when we were just too damn different. And please, don't apologise. Feel free to dump anything on me, I might actually understand more than most. But still, being alone can suck way more than the other side of the fence. Don't you get lonely?"

Peter's eyebrows rose slightly, his lips pressed together. "I'm really sorry, I can kind of understand what it's like. My brother... he's divorced, too. Only he had two kids in the bargain, and Heidi had been a part of his life for years. They just grew apart after, he... ah, after he had an accident." Peter being the accident when Nathan flew him high up into the sky to explode safely away from New York. Only Nathan had been badly burned, his face damaged. His life damaged. All because of Peter. It felt like a life time ago given what had passed between now, and then, but Peter would never forget. Not now he had his memories back. He scratched his forehead and brushed his hair out of his face. "I'm kind of sorry you understand. It's not fair when we lose people close to us. And yeah, of course I get lonely. Probably why I work so hard. Figure I'll eventually fill the hole, or just numb it."

"My wife wanted her dead husband's kids. Kind of killed the procreating mood," Chase offered and then scrunched up his nose wryly. "Sorry. Sorry, I'm bitter. The sad part is, the divorce was my fault. I... did something, she didn't approve of it. I didn't cheat or anything like that, she thought I was. That was completely independent to the base issue, though. I'm sorry to hear about your brother. Divorce is... makes you wonder how the relationship even got off the ground in the first place. Then it makes you wonder if you have the energy to try again. The loss thing, yeah. I lost both my parents. My Mum when I was barely seventeen, and the relationship with my Dad was screwed, but his death didn't hurt any less. Maybe made it hurt more, if anything. Long story." He glanced away, watching some nurses pass up the corridor. He cleared his throat again and turned back to Peter, a small frown on his forehead. "A lot of my life is a long story. You don't want to work so hard and wake up one day to realise you're miserable and lonely. I know someone like that. He can be a real arse, in fact, most days, he's a real arse. Some days, I wonder if he's even capable of loving unconditionally. But trust me, you don't want to turn into him."

Peter's eyebrows shot up at the dead husband's kid comment, unable to stop his reaction. He really didn't know what to say to that. He didn't know what to say to any of it, other than this odd sense of relief at finding someone as damaged as he was. Peter had seen some insane things recently. Had dealt with a lot of loss. He understood, just maybe not because of the same circumstances. He leaned forward, his elbows resting on his knees as he dropped his voice to a low murmur that only Chase could here. "My Dad died. Heart attack. At least that's what we all thought. It was just me, Nathan, and my Mom for a while. It wasn't like we were kids. We were grown up, but it was hard. Dad was very much the Petrelli patriarch, you know? And then there's Mom. She's... well, she's Mom. I'm not actually sure there's a word to adequately describe her. I was never able to live up to her expectations. Nathan was always her favourite. She wanted him to be President. Probably still does. She's very much about status and power. Sometimes, though... Sometimes she's just my Mom. Anyway, my point is that my Dad wasn't dead. He, ah... he came back. Still not sure how it happened. I just know he wasn't who I remembered. Not who we thought he was. Dad's a bastard. And dead. Again." He licked his lips as he looked up at Chase from under his dark hair. "I don't want to be a prick like him. I don't want to be lonely either, but I'm sick of losing people."

Chase was listening and when Peter got to the part about his father dying, he felt dangerously like he was about to choke up and cry. Their experiences with fathers were close, and Chase just knew he was overly fragile in the wake of everything that had happened lately. He pressed his fingers against his lips, not replying straight away and then he cleared his throat. His voice still came out hoarse when he did speak, though and he swallowed to try and dislodge the lump in his throat a little. "Ah," he began and moved his hand to scratch his fingers through the back of his hair. "My Dad had cancer. Lung Cancer, very advanced stages. I didn't know. He came here from Australia to see our Oncologist here, who is one of the best in the country. It looked like he had just come to see me, but I should have known that wasn't the whole story. He was here for days, didn't tell me. When he left, I asked him if he wanted to get a drink, but he turned me down. Pretty much the story of my life, he was never there when I needed him... wanted him. Three months later, got a call he was dead. That's how I found out he had been terminal. He knew when he was here, he only had three months to live. I'm sick of losing people too..." It wasn't an admission he had ever said out loud before and the words felt foreign coming from his lips, but they came with a blunt realisation. This is was why he had tried so hard to make things work with Cameron. He didn't want to lose her, even if they were too different for the relationship to really work. But now that she was gone, in the circumstances it all ended, he couldn't see it as a loss... just a mistake in judgement.

Peter reached out to rest his hand on Chase's shoulder, thumb rubbing against his collarbone. It was a gesture Nathan had always used on Peter, and it was oddly comforting. It was usually when his brother was trying to talk sense into him. Only he knew he didn't have to talk sense to Chase. They were similar in so many ways it was strange, but Peter realised he didn't exactly want the friendship to end here. He liked talking to someone that just got it. He kept some of the finer details out about abilities, and strange powers. He didn't need to freak Chase out. "Makes you wonder what's wrong with you."

Chase gave a slight nod. "Then when you think you get something right, it comes with prices..." he elaborated and shot Peter a faint, grateful smile at the comfort. He didn't know why Peter was so easy to talk to, but he was, and it had been a long time since Chase really had a mate he felt he could just pour his heart out to. Not since he left Australia, and even then, he hadn't ever much been the sort to pour his heart out. He was always the listener when someone else wanted to. "Are you... do you have to be back? To New York? Or can you stick around for a few hours? Maybe we could get a drink after my shift. My shout, even if I'll likely stick to OJ. Still in the 'I'm never drinking ever again' phase. But, you know, Christmas is nearly here, you're really easy to talk to. But if you can't, it's cool. Like I said, Christmas is nearly here. It's busy."

"Christmas..." Peter murmured, looking like he'd only just realise the holiday was coming up. "Shit, I didn't... I mean, I knew. It just wasn't sinking in. Like it was something that happened to other people." Peter dropped his head with a disbelieving laugh. "Wow, I really have become that guy, haven't I? And you know what? I don't need to be back in New York. I think I could use the break for a little while. And I could definitely use the drink. Even if you'll stick to OJ. You're easy to talk to as well, Doctor."

Chase reflexively patted the front of his scrubs, looking for his keys. It was stupid, considering they were in his locker. "I pretty much have nothing to lose, so I'll get my keys for you and you can hang out at my place until I get off at five. The place is in a bit of a state. Newly single again and wallowing in my own self-misery isn't very conducive to housework. But just make yourself at home. It isn't like you didn't open your home up for me when I needed it the most." He paused, both hands wrapping around the half-empty coffee cup, and looked at Peter closely. "Have you got anyone to spend Christmas with?"

Peter watched Chase with a slight look of amazement, before he smiled gratefully. "Thanks for the offer. It would at least keep me free of Christmas crowds if I had to kill time around here, or at some shops. That's one thing I will never miss about Christmas - the crowds." Peter chuckled. "And hey, don't worry about it. I'm definitely not one to judge on the state of your apartment. I'm a single guy, too. Also know what it's like to wallow in self-misery. Um, Christmas? I... I guess it'd be my brother, but he hasn't exactly mentioned any plans and my Mom's too busy looking out for Nathan to remember me. My, ah, my niece would be spending it with her family. She's adopted. My brother is her father. Long story. Again."

"It was hers. I just moved in when... she finally let me move in," Chase said with a wry scrunch of his nose. "Took her two years to give me a draw in her dresser. But old water and all that shit. If you can't get on the same page as any of your family, you're welcome to come here. We can get a pizza or something, watch crappy old action movies, maybe drag the James Bond box set out. I've been in a funk, but it's never fun to spend Christmas alone."

"Or to spend it surrounded by people you don't give a shit about," Peter added. "My family, they're... well, with a politician brother, and the parents I had, there were always 'fundraisers'." Peter couldn't even be bothered to hide the contempt in his voice. "Keeping up appearances, and all that fun stuff. The actual family side of Christmas was minimal. Me and Nathan always made an effort for each other, but it hasn't happened in a while. I'd, um, I'd actually like that. Just relaxing for the holiday. Spending some time with a friend." Peter gave him a crooked smile.

Chase frowned sympathetically and nodded. "I understand. My Dad was a world-renowned rheumatologist. Business dinners, work functions, fundraisers, looking the pristine doctor's son... I really do understand, and I know how much it sucks." He met Peter's smile with one of his own. "Okay, well, we have a date. Plenty of room if you want to stay a couple of days. I've got Christmas off. Cuddy, the boss of the hospital, seems to think I look like I need a break. It'll be good not to have to spend the whole of it picking lint out of my naval."

"Hey, I wouldn't argue with her. My boss seemed to think the same," Peter laughed. "Guess picking our navals really takes a lot of effort." He raised his coffee cup in a toast. "Here's to shit dads, finding people who get it, and Christmas plans we actually want to happen."

Chase had to laugh a little and raised his own cup. "And to paramedics who still work when they're off duty," he added with a smirk. "Cheers, mate."

Words: 4406

musebysentence | 41.2 Acknowledge

2009-12-24T08:04:23Z

I've never expected anyone else to remember considering I don't even manage to remember myself.

musebysentence | 39.7 Envelope

2009-12-20T10:24:37Z

The package arrived, and Peter had stared at it for what seemed like hours as he tried to work out what the doctor could have been sending him, before ripping it open and just smiling.

musesandlyrics | 4.29 Them Crooked Vultures lyrics

2009-12-13T07:28:38Z

4.29. You can't always do what's right
But you can do what's left
No One Loves Me & Neither Do I - Them Crooked Vultures

In the aftermath, it was difficult for Chase to wrap his head around the events of the past couple of years. It felt like so much had happened, but at the same time, a lot of it felt like a dream... that turned into a nightmare.

Marrying Cameron was supposed to have been a way for everything to resolve itself. Their relationship had been far from perfect. No one was ever going to choose them as a pin-up couple for conventional romance. Not at all. In fact, some days, Chase had really wondered what the fuck he was doing or why he was bothering. There seemed to be very little give on her part to all of his attempts to make it work. He could never put his finger on why they never seemed to be on the same page. But he was optimistic, and they had been together a few years. Maybe it was time to take the next step? And it had mostly been thoughts along those lines which made him think to propose to her. Optimism was something no one could accuse him of lacking. But even then, the proposal had waned. She had ruined it by trying to run away in some odd panic about her dead husband and commitment. He still didn't understand the whole thing, and when she came to him and told him she did want him to propose rather than them splitting up, it was like he just reacted. He didn't even say the words! There was some little niggling voice in the back of his head telling him it was a bad idea.

But still, he persisted. It all nearly went down the toilet for the countless time when she admitted to him she was keeping her dead husband's sperm somewhere. Now, Chase had ethics, but this whole thing just creeped him out. He got in the mindset, however, that he did love her and he put this much into the relationship. Should something like this be the end of it? Maybe. Probably. Who really knew? But he ended up marrying her anyway. He was in his early thirties and they were mostly happy together. They could make it work. Only, they were just too different in essence. Had different values and different needs. Cameron wanted to save people, but Chase just didn't need saving. He grew up making sure he didn't need anyone to save him. He could survive just fine on his own, and prided himself on that. After his parents let him down, he really didn't want to 100% rely on anyone ever again. He could give some of himself, and be happy in a relationship, be happy with commitment, but he didn't want a relationship to ever fully swallow him up. It was only when Cameron came to him that day and basically indicated that he couldn't think for himself in House's presence, that he was incapable of making his own choices without House, that he knew the relationship was starting to do just that. He had been flexible and understanding with her ethics and morals, but she was never going to be able to afford him the same luxury. Not while she had House to punish for not returning her unrequited love. Chase knew House had always been an issue, but when she started blurring the lines between him and House, unable to recognise Chase was his own person, he knew it was over.

Well and truly over.

All over. All said and done. He was a murderer and his marriage was over. He still stood by his choices, though. It was his choice to take the African dictator's life and he did so knowingly. It wasn't House's evil bastard voodoo powers at work. House hadn't changed Chase at all. And so fucking what if he did? Chase walked away from his life in Australia to learn off House, to solve the medical puzzles just like House did. But at the same time, Chase held onto his own values. He always had, and although House pulled the piss out of them for most of what they stood for, he never really did try to make them change their beliefs. He made it more than clear if they didn't want to learn how he taught, they could get lost. As the hours turned into days following Cameron leaving, Chase's anger over her call on the situation increased. Had she ever really known him? Probably not. It sounded like she was now just humouring him until he woke up one day thinking and feelings exactly how she did. He didn't want to think and feel how she did. He wanted to be her husband, not her clone. It was ironic she accused him of being like House in that regard. It was okay to be like her and harbour her sometimes overly moralistic view on life, but not House's? It just so happened that Chase felt taking Dibala's life was the right thing to do. It was also a very wrong thing to do, but he was willing to bear the consequences. The consequences being grief and guilt, but he still took a man's life who was going to be the cause of thousands of deaths. Chase stood by his beliefs. He would do the same thing over again if faced with a similar situation.

That didn't mean he wasn't going to react in some way. Bearing that level of guilt wasn't easy. He started to suffer panic attacks in the ICU, even before he came clean to Cameron. Which was another thing bugging him, deep down. She had been so quick to assume he was having an affair. It was surprising she hadn't thought he was having an affair with House with her obsession with the older doctor. Bottom line was, he wanted to stay. He wanted to face what he did. He didn't want to run away. He didn't want a fresh start. Pissing off wasn't going to change what he did. So, his marriage ended and he returned to House's team. For Chase, it felt like he was coming home again. He belonged in Diagnostics. He could see that now. One small silver lining of the whole shit. But it was a lot to try and process all in one go. He was so sick to fucking death of people asking him if he was okay and telling him he needed to talk about it. Thumping House in the face as a tactic to get everyone to see what he was capable of if his buttons were pushed enough was pretty genius, if he did say so himself. He was surprised House didn't cotton on sooner, but he was relieved House took it okay. House had thumped Chase a couple of years back anyway, so call it delayed payback. In any sense, Chase appreciated House's support... which accepting a punch with little basis was really about as much of support as House was capable of. It wasn't like he was going to let Chase cry on his shoulder or hug him again.

To be able to get back on the horse, though, Chase needed to just get away for a bit. He needed out of Princeton. Not to run away, but just to clear his head. He had already got plastered on Thanksgiving with a couple of mates in a Princeton bar, but he had to be at work again the next day. Luckily he had already been emanating a brooding jilted husband façade, so the fact he was hungover mostly flew under the radar with the team busy on the case. The case was over now, though, and Chase just got into his car and drove. He didn't have a destination, anywhere out of Princeton was going to work. Or, out of Princeton with a good supply of booze. New York seemed like a good option. His wedding ring had been tossed into the bottom of his sock drawer and pushed to the back about a week ago. He might have gotten used to wearing it, but he could get used to not wearing it again just as easily. To cope, all he could do was chalk the last few years up as a mistake. Time for a fresh start. He had his job back, and as soon as he got so piss-blind drunk he forgot his own name and lost his underwear, he would be ready to start over again. With more skeletons in his closet, and without Cameron.

Getting pissed hadn't taken him long. A nightclub was his hideout, lots of hot chicks willing to dance with the half-drunk Aussie doctor. He missed this, the freedom of letting his hair down and just having fun. The night flew by quickly, and he had thought ahead to book into a hotel. Only, now he was so drunk he couldn't remember the name of the hotel, he couldn't remember his own name, or where he had parked his car. Not that he could drive. That was illegal. "'llgal..." he slurred to himself as he stumbled up the busy New York sidewalk. He bumped into someone and apologised repeatedly before starting to giggle and soon ended up hugging the person and telling him he loved them more than his wife. Luckily the person was equally as drunk, shared Chase's sentiments and then they both went on their own drunken ways. Chase was trying to get his wallet out of his pocket, until he realised it wasn't even in his pocket... it was already in his hand. This just led to more giggles, which made his already unsteady balance even more unstable. His drunken brain was still trying to figure out the wallet mystery when a group of dolled-up women bounded up the sidewalk all perfume, tits and highheels. One unknowingly knocked into Chase, not even stopping to check he was okay. He wasn't okay. In fact, before they even appeared, the world felt like it had started to spin and he was veering closer and closer to passing out. But instead of just dropping to the sidewalk, he bumped into a lamp post, hitting his head, and fell onto the street, directly in the line of oncoming cars, who just got the green light at the nearby intersection. Maybe he wasn't going to get his fresh start afterall.

Peter Petrelli had been watching the blond guy, his lips quirking in amusement as he made his way slowly up the New York sidewalk on his way home. Home being an apartment he spent very little in these days. Between all the shifts he pulled at the hospital, and all the people he still tried to save - he didn't have time to just go home and rest. He still had an ability. Granted it was one that wasn't as flexible as it had been originally.

But at least it was something.

He wasn't ordinary. He hadn't still been just a normal guy. How could he be after the things he'd seen, and the dangers he knew he could help stop? It was why he'd trained to be a paramedic. He could help save people at the scene of accidents, not watch them die. Not like he had done as a hospice nurse. That time in his life seemed so distant now. Everything that had happened between that first eclipse and now, it felt like a lifetime. If he knew he didn't possess Claire's healing, he could have sworn he'd lived a few decades, and not just a few years.

He was tired, but he couldn't stop. He couldn't afford to when accidents happened everyday, tragedies occurred every hour in New York City. They just weren't always the cause of someone diabolical, or someone intent on ending the world as they knew it. Not everything was a conspiracy, even though it could feel like it sometimes. He still had no idea what Noah had tried to drag him into recently, but he did know the super speed he'd picked up off that knife guy was handy.

Especially when he saw the drunken blond take a dive for the street as the cars started to move. Peter hadn't even been thinking about being caught. He just rushed in to pick the man up, and quickly drag him to safety on the other side of the street. There was a darkened alley, and Peter carefully lay the man down to give him a quick checkover. He seemed to be out cold, probably a head wound. Peter bit his lip as he glanced around to see if anyone had noticed. No one was looking their way, and Peter hefted the drunk up so he could hold one of his arms around his waist and start to carry him back out of the alley.

God only knew why, but Peter had a sudden urge to take him back to his place. He wanted to make sure the guy would be okay, and he really did just need to stay away from the hospital for a bit. "It's alright, man," he murmured. "Saving people is my thing. You'll be safe." Peter managed to hail a cab, and smirked in amusement when the guy's head fell against his shoulder while they rode in the back and a little bit of drool came out.

When he manged to get them both up to his place, Peter had him laying down on his bed while he tried to work out his next move. He had to wonder what his brother would make of this, too. Nathan was scarce these days. It would be typical of the older Petrelli to walk in at a moment like this.

All Chase could feel at first was a fucking huge piece of shit bastard pain in the head. In fact, those words fell out of his mouth in a slur with a hiss of pain as he put his hand up reflexively to touch it. But that, of course, just made it hurt even more and he shifted on the bed, trying to sit up. "Jus' gotta..." hise hand crawled blindly beside him, looking for something to connect with for leverage and he ended up unknowingly grabbing hold of a leg. He didn't have the strength to pull himself up, though. "Hey... you.... hey... jus' one more, yeah?" he suggested, his Aussie accent coming out thicker with the effects of the booze. He really did just want another drink. That would stop the pain. But his head dropped woozily back onto the pillow. "I think... I... I think... you... I... me... m'drunk a bit," he decided with a laugh.

"Just a bit, yeah," Peter echoed with a chuckle of his own. His brow creased briefly as he watched the man, not sure whether to be amused, or concerned. He didn't look like a street bum in the clothes he was wearing. In fact, he just reminded Peter a little of doctors he'd met. Only none of them had been Australian, or this drunk. "Hey, man, you got a name? Someone I need to call? You've, ah... you've fallen and hit your head. So that will be why your head's hurting."

"Greg House junior," Chase offered with a snort at his own sick joke. He held his hand up. "Nah, s'not. S'not that. Shoulbe but 'ccordin' t'other bloody people... s'all jus' bollocks anyway." He managed to get his eyes open just a crack and realised that he wasn't talking to himself like he thought he was. "Oh, heyyy... ya' have a face f'real. Thought ya' were in m'head. Which would... ya' know.... 'llucinations an' shit. Not good, mate." He tugged on the sleeve of Peter's shirt, almost like he was trying to pull him closer. "M'evil. Broken. No goin' back. Jus' put me outta my misery an' then... ya' got any Vodka, mate?" He started to giggle again, putting a hand over his eyes. "She thought I was turnin' in t'House! I got m'own brain, mate. An' my own sperm. I 'ave my own sperm. An' s'bloody good."

Peter's eyebrow crept up as his gaze slid down--Greg's?--body. He quickly blinked, because a drunken man's sperm shouldn't be something he was thinking about. "Evil, huh? Somehow I really don't think that's true. You and I must have different definitions of evil." Peter crouched to bring his face closer to the other man's, his nose scrunching up as he got hit with a face full of alcoholic breath. "And you really, really don't need anymore Vodka, man. Trust me. How about some nice water? Nice, clear, non-smelly water."

The room started to feel like it was spinning and Chase whimpered softly. "I should... should... um..." It was getting harder and harder to get his mind to formulate anything. "Call. Should call... dunno the fuck who, though." His brain felt like it was turning somersaults in his head. He felt sore and dizzy and sick all at once. His hand remained over his eyes, scared if he took them away his brain might push his eyeballs out of the sockets and that wouldn't be a good look. He didn't know where he was, or if he was maybe dreaming this bloke here. He sounded a little like Wilson, only he didn't really look like Wilson. Or maybe his brain had crossed Wilson with someone else, like James Bond? Dr Phil? He groaned. Thinking hurt, even if he was hallucinating.

"Just hang on..." Peter quickly moved out of the bedroom to duck into the kitchen and grab some water. He also made a quick trip into his bathroom to grab a face cloth and bucket. He'd always had one on hand for hangovers like this. Nothing like having a bucket to be sick into when the toilet was too far. Peter was back by the man's side, sitting on the edge of the bed as he dampened the face cloth and dabbed it against his forehead. "Seriously though, got a name? Otherwise I'm just going to have to call you Mick Dundee. I'm Peter. This is my place. Wasn't sure where else to take you. You nearly got hit by a car. A few cars, actually."

"Y'wouldn't be the first..." Chase mumbled, feeling like he either wanted to throw up spectacularly, or pass out. Maybe die. Dying would be nice. No pain. Maybe a few Vicodin would go down nicely, stick with Cameron's image of him. "Chase- Rob... ert. Robert. Chase. Rob," he tried to explain but it was coming out in a jumble. He was trying to swallow back the nausea as his mouth dampened in a precursor to throwing up. "Sure I wasn't hit by a bus?" he asked hoarsely.

Peter put down the cloth, and picked up the bucket. He was already trying to move Chase onto his side in case he did decide to be sick. It was better he didn't choke on his vomit. He rubbed Chase's back soothingly, and smiled a little. "Nice to meet you, Rob Chase. Even if it should have probably been under better circumstances. And I'm very sure there were no buses involved."

Chase automatically shifted onto his side at the coaxing, but it did set the room spinning ten-fold, which sent him almost choking on a cough and then throwing up probably everything he had swallowed that night. He had never really held his liquor that well. He always got drunk quite quick, but then he was the sort to hit the hard start right up if he was going on a bender. Normally he would just stick to a beer or two. Getting this drunk wasn't his norm, especially after his mother died of alcoholism. That was a very strategically placed bucket, too. It was nice when that happened and you didn't miss the target. Missed targets made for bad wake up calls the morning after. When he was done, he felt exhausted, and put his hand up to swipe his fingers across his mouth with a groan, his cheek rested against the edge of the bed as he tried to get his breath back. The dizziness had eased just a little, and he didn't feel as horrible now he was probably empty. Empty until the hangover kicked in, anyway. He should keep a hold of that bucket. "How 'bout a small bus?" he offered now that his head was doing that thumping thing again.

Peter put the bucket down, and gently brought the water to Chase's lips, trying to get him to drink a little. "Alright, a small bus. A small bus with lots and lots of booze and lamp posts that knock you down into the street when you try and kiss them."

Chase managed to drink a little before his gag reflex kicked in, which could well mean he was dehydrated and needed the water anyway. He got another couple of small sips in before he couldn't take it anymore or he would just end up spewing all over again. "Oh, thank god it was just a lamp post," he groaned, more than knowing the sorts of things his drunk track record had notched up on it. "I wasn't trying to make out with it, was I?" he asked, getting his eyes open a little more so he could look up at the guy. He blinked, trying to focus on his face. "Am I dead?"

Peter bit back a chuckle. He really shouldn't be finding the guy's condition so amusing, but for some reason he was. And he had blond hair that was falling into his face. Peter reached out to tuck it behind his ear, trying to get it out of the way in case Chase did decide to be sick again. "No, not that I could tell. I think you and the lamp post were just friends. And no, you're not dead. Not yet. You might be wishing for it come hangover time."

Chase's head was hurting and he pushed his fingers into his hair, trying to find the site of it. It was an all-over throbbing, but one part hurt more than the rest. He took his fingers away again, finding blood on them. "Ah, shit," he cursed. "I thought it was hurting like a fucking bitch. Have you got a first aid kit? Antiseptic? Cotton balls, gauze, something like that?" He was a bit more lucid now, getting a lot of the booze out of his system must have helped a little. Realising he was bleeding was kind of sobering, too. "Where am I again? Who are you? I just... shit. I don't remember much about tonight."

Peter immediately moved into action, and went to get his paramedic bag. It was better than a first aid kit most of the time. It was clear as he started to clean the wound that he knew what he was doing. "I'm a paramedic, my name is Peter. This is my apartment. I'm sorry if this is weird... I probably should have taken you to the hospital, but figured you'd feel better waking up somewhere... strange." Peter had to laugh a little, he really hadn't thought this through.

"Well, if I was going to fall down drunk in front of anyone, I lucked out with a paramedic. Could have gotten an accountant or something. Or a politician, knowing my luck." Chase tried to sit up so he could help Peter, but his head spun painfully and lost his balance, dropping back onto the bed dizzily. "Fuck... sorry. Just needa minute. How hard did I hit my head? Did you see? I can't even remember right now why I fucking bother drinking anymore..."

"I'm sure you had your reasons..." Peter wasn't even going to begin to guess what they were, and if they really did lead back to his sperm. He'd snapped on a pair of gloves to tend to Chase's head wound, wincing when he heard him suck in a breath as he touched a particularly tender spot. "I think you're gonna need a couple stiches, man. Been a while since I've done them, but if you trust me..." Peter tilted his head to look at Chase. "Not that you have any reason to really trust me, but I am trying to help. Promise. Nothing weird going on. And my brother's a politician. Pretty sure he probably would have thrown money at you, and then let someone else take care of the problem."

Chase puffed his cheeks out when the pain in his head increased at the examination. He gave the slightest of strained laughs. "Would have been interesting when I told him to fuck off. I don't accept medical care too easily." He squeezed his eyes shut. "I think I might have a concussion. Try not to let me fall asleep for a couple of hours, okay? In saying that, you probably don't need a drunk stranger invading your place. You can just dump me at an ER if you like. I'll probably abscond, but at least it won't be on your watch."

Peter's eyebrow quirked a little. Chase seemed to be having no problem accepting it now. He also seemed to know what he was talking about. "I hear doctors make the worst patients. Don't suppose you're hiding a stethoscope somewhere? If I was just going to dump you at an ER, I would have done that already. I don't mind keeping you here for a couple of hours. I'd rather know you were okay."

Maybe it was a doctor accepting help from another doctor thing. Maybe it was something he also inherited off House, but Chase was more leaning towards his father. The father Cameron seemed to forget he once had that was actually the root of most of Chase's head fuck problems. She couldn't seem to move beyond her own dead husband, but it was like Chase's dead father never existed. And didn't she realise the fact that, at age seventeen, he watched his mother die a horrible death by alcoholism and that maybe - just maybe - that had something to do with Chase's values on euthanasia? Chase groaned as his thoughts turned to Cameron again. He didn't want that. He got drunk to forget all that. He was tired of being angry and on the constant defense. That was the thing. With her, he always had to defend himself. Why couldn't he have a relationship with someone who just fucking got him. For him. He wasn't that much of a dickwad that he had to change himself to be in love, was he? "Unless I shoved it up my arse for safe-keeping, I'm thinking I left it in my other lab coat," he mumbled when his hand went back over his face again. "That wasn't completely sarcastic, by the way. I am a doctor. I wasn't pulling the piss at your deduction. I'm not on duty, just had a really, really fucked up few weeks. God pissed on me from great heights when I tried to intervene in his plan. The priest wouldn't even grant me Absolution." He took his hand away, looking at Peter with a frown. "Not exactly sure why he let you save me, to be honest. Wants to keep me alive to fuck with me some more, no doubt. Don't worry, I'm not a bible-basher. Just really drunk."

"Nice to know my deductive powers aren't shoved up my ass, or in my other paramedic bag." Peter couldn't help but let out a low chuckle. He paused before starting to apply the stitches, making sure his hand was steady. "It's fine. Believe me, I get it. I'm not exactly a practicing Catholic. I spoke to God for the first time in years a little while ago, but I'm still not sure if He was listening, or not. Sometimes I think He is looking out for me, sometimes I just thing we're all on our own. And I'm not a bible-basher, just... ah, sober." It was only three stitches that Chase needed, and Peter was done quicker than he'd expected. "That should be okay now. As you'd know, head wounds are always big bleeders. It looked worse than it was."

The sutures didn't hurt so much. Chase didn't know whether it was because he had a thick head, he was too drunk to feel the pain, or that Peter just had good suturing skills. "Thanks, mate," he murmured, even if his fingers were still hesitantly crawling through his blood streaked blond hair to make sure his brains were about to fall out of the hole. It was just a reflexive action. He wasn't exactly thinking very straight and he was starting to feel a lethargy set in. His eyes felt heavy and he blinked slowly, but he knew he couldn't fall asleep. He had to stick it out a little longer just to make sure he wasn't going to black out, haemorrhage or have a seizure. He pressed his lips together, trying to get his brain to form more than random drivel. As it was, he hoped he hadn't spilled the whole Dibala story to Peter in his drunken state. The guy probably wouldn't have brought a murderer back to his apartment if he knew, though. "I was practicing. Once. Not so much anymore. When I need it, which probably makes me a sinner anyway. I guess it takes a lot for someone to really shake their faith."

"We stick with what we know," Peter murmured quietly as he started to clear things off the bed, and stripped off the latex gloves. "We're raised, generally, to not know any other life except one that involves a belief in God. When we lose it, it's hard. We don't think we can ever believe again, but when things get tough... it's amazing how easy it is to believe." Peter gave Chase a lopsided smile as he rest his hand on his shoulder. "I'm not sure talking about God will keep either of us awake, though. No offence."

Chase puffed his cheeks out with a breath, then let it go in a rush. He was in a lot of pain now, finding that he needed to lie still so nothing ached. It started in his head, but emanated through the rest of him. He must have some bangs and bruises from falling so heavily onto the road. He couldn't even remember doing it. It was just a fog in his head, but a booze-soaked concussion would do that to you. He was also feeling nauseous, he just couldn't tell whether it was a hangover setting in or the concussion. Not that it mattered. He felt guilty invading the guy's apartment and if he was going to come crashing down with a shit of a hangover, he was going to end up invading the guy's bathroom too. "Sometimes you choose to throw it away when it brings you no peace, too. You could say that's the boat I fell into. I never had complete faith in it after that." He squeezed his eyes shut and tried to get himself up onto his elbow, but everything screamed out in pain and a small moan fell from his lips. "I should go, mate. You've been awesome, but I don't want to impose. I booked into a hotel, but I just can't remember which one. The receipt's in my wallet. You probably need to catch some sleep if you've been on the job anyway." His head spun heavily and he had to shift his elbow so his head was against the pillow again. It wasn't the most comfortable position, but if he stayed upright much longer, he would vomit or pass out again.

Peter rest a hand gently on Chase's chest, his face reflecting concern and amusement. "Look, man, as much as I probably do need to rest right now, you're not going anywhere. I'm not cruel enough to turf you out onto the street. So just stop being a martyr, okay? I think that's the one bit of Catholicism we can both skip for now. Just think of this as another hotel, but without the mints on the pillow, and the maid service. Instead you get a paramedic-slash-nursing service."

"I don't think I have the energy to argue," Chase realised with a mumble. He could really use some Tylenol, or maybe a hit of House's Vicodin. He opened his eyes and looked up at Peter tiredly. "Thanks, for everything. I really appreciate you helping me... stopping me getting squished by ten cars... saving my life. Just... thanks."

Peter smiled at Chase. "Maybe you should save that thanks. Not sure you'll be too thankful in the morning when the hangover kicks in. I'll get you something for the pain. Some more water as well. Just remember not to let your eyes close. I'll only be a moment. Then I guess we can just pass the time with awkward small talk." Peter had no idea what would happen come morning. It was strange having someone in his apartment that was a stranger. It was also strange to think he might wind up actually taking a day off because of it. Peter had a White Knight complex. He couldn't not stick around to make sure Chase really was okay, and get him home safely.

Words: 5572

Kissy, Kissy!

2009-12-10T09:10:12Z

theCome kiss me under the mistletoememe

musebysentence | 35.8 Human

2009-11-21T11:48:20Z

I think I need a very different kind of contact than my mother.

musesandlyrics | 3.24 These Arms of Mine

2009-10-12T09:19:04Z

24. And if you would let them hold you
Oh, how grateful I will be
These arms of mine
They are burning, burning from wanting you
These arms of mine
They are wanting, wanting to hold you
These Arms of Mine - Otis Redding

Co-written with randybyname

Peter had no idea how he'd managed it, but somehow he had managed to get his jeans on up over his hips. Now he just needed a break before he even contemplated getting his fly up. He had boxers on, so it wasn't like anyone could see anything. He had one arm in a cast, and he looked down at it tiredly. It was strange, but he'd had healing for so long that part of him was at a loss for how to deal with a normal injury like a broken arm. His ability didn't work like it did before, so he couldn't heal without touching someone like his niece to pick it up again.

And then he'd lose his brother's flight, and for some reason he wanted to keep a hold of it. Like it would be a connection to Nathan. In Princeton Peter was on his own, and he had wanted it that way. He'd wanted a fresh start, and normality. He just hadn't expected to be literally hit with it. He could still picture the blonde clearly in his mind, and he knew she'd visited him a couple times. He could even remember asking for her.

He just wished he could have a conversation with her without being drowsy, or stuck in a hospital bed. He just wasn't sure if they'd got to swapping details so once he was out of here as a patient would she even be able to find him again? Would he be able to her? He remembered something about a brother as a nurse at PPTH, but for all he knew he was imagining it because he wanted some link to her, some way to find her that was easy.

Of course it would still mean talking to every male nurse, and coming across as crazy, but Peter had been called worse. He was also no stranger to being called crazy. He winced as he straightened his back, still feeling a little sensitive all over from hitting the ground. He just wanted to lay back down and curl up until he felt better. Maybe with Randy holding him, but he wasn't supposed to be having those thoughts, right?

Randy had just finished having lunch with Matt. She just couldn't help worrying about her brother after his shock with the patient death. He seemed to be doing okay, though, maybe just a little shaken that it would happen again. It wasn't that she thought he would throw nursing in after it, because she knew he loved it too much and he was brilliant at it. Still, she was also the one studying psychology and she knew things that gave people a shock could lead to them wavering in their confidence. He was mostly just tired after a long shift, though, and ravenous, which was a good sign. She bought him a pizza from the local joint a block away from the hospital and he ate just about the whole thing.

She wasn't sure if Peter was even going to still be a patient, but she decided to drop by the room he was in just in case. She was close to backing off, not sure anymore if he just didn't want her there, wasn't much of a talker, or really did have a sore head that made him not really aware of his surroundings. It was more tipping in the former two options in her mind, though, and she wasn't sure what to make of that. She just wanted to know he was okay and she would stop bugging him. Matt wouldn't pass on any information about Peter, even if he might have had access to it. It was because he was a colleague too and Matt didn't want to fuck up more than he thought he had. If Peter was okay today, Randy would be okay to leave him alone and stop haunting him. She just didn't expect him to be half-dressed when she did it and when she appeared in the doorway, she squeaked and slapped her hand over her eyes, holding her other one up apologetically. "Shit, I'm sorry. This isn't doing my attempt to convince you I'm not a stalker any good. I-I'll go, and leave you to it," she said hastily.

Peter held out his uninjured hand as he looked up at her. "Wait, no. Please. I, um, I was just thinking about you. I think I might actually need some help. You know, if you could manage it. I still don't actually know how I managed to get this far. Probably just the need to not be in one of those embarrassing gowns." He chuckled a little as he looked down with a lopsided smile. "You've seen me zonked out of my mind. I think me like this is maybe the better option. At least I hope so."

Randy kept her hand over her eyes for the moment, hovering again and not sure what to do. "Are you sure?" she asked anxiously. "I can get you a nurse. Good nurses in this place, I can vouch for that. Though, my brother isn't on this ward, so I might be a bit biased in saying he's the best." She dropped her hand with a laugh. "Actually, how did you get that far into the jeans with the cast on? Are you superhero or something?"

There was a fleeting hint of panic that crossed Peter's face before he shook his head with a laugh. "Not quite Superman, even if I am wearing the boxers. It has been about twenty minutes before I started getting dressed..." He looked sheepish, but waved her closer. "Just stop hovering, Randy. I... I like you being here. I've liked you being around. I'm sorry I've been a really crap conversationalist. Hits to the head kind of make me stupid. I was just being stubborn and not wanting a nurse to help. I'm sure your brother's nurse vibes have rubbed off on you somehow."

"What is it with guys and superman pants? My brother has them too. Whenever I hung the washing out when he lived at home, I used to hang them right at the front of the line so all the neighbours could see them," Randy said with a devious smirk. She breached the gap between them, her hands getting shoved in her pockets. "I actually wasn't sure if you were just wanting me to shut up and piss off, which I would have totally understood on account of the fact I hit you with my car and nearly killed you. I'm also studying psychology, so I didn't know if you were trying to project a wish for me to get out of your personal space. And on that note, I should warn you that studying psychology tends to make me overthink everything, and talk too much," she added as her hands were pulled from her pockets again for them to go to his jeans without hesitation, helping him with them carefully. "I promise I won't give you a wedgie, as tempting as it is."

"Hitting me with my car wasn't enough?" Peter asked with a slight smirk of his own. He touched her wrist with his fingers, ghosting his fingertips across her skin. "You're a bit of an evil sister, aren't you? I bet he just loved having his boxers flashed to the neighbours. I don't know what it is about the underwear. Think it's us still trying to hang onto our boyhood. We never really grow up, do we? So you're a budding psychologist, huh? You always assume people don't want you around?" He raised his eyebrows a little as he watched her. "It's more just my head was still swimming. I was actually just trying to work out how I was going to find you again since I was never conscious enough to ask for your number."

Randy laughed. "It's a mutual evilness. Or more like a three-way. My sister and me give as good as we get with Matty," she explained, still trying to carefully tug his pants up. "I think I'm destined to have a boyfriend with Superman jocks. It seems like one of those fated things in life. And no, I'm not usually this paranoid, only with people I nearly kill. I figured I wasn't your favourite person in the whole world right now." She glanced up at him. "You wanted my number?"

"Maybe I'm fated to have a girlfriend that hits me with her car? Might explain why the others haven't lasted," Peter suggested, not really joking. He felt his stomach tighten with nerves and realised he might have just given away entirely too much of his muddled thinking of late. "I think it's what siblings are for. The mutual evilness. Me and my broth--I miss it." Peter gave a nod. "Yeah, I did. Is that okay? I mean, I know it's weird. Why would you want anything to do with me? I feel like a really weird stalker right now."

Randy looked up at him, her eyes remaining on his face as she rose slowly, and her hands still sitting on the waist of his jeans. Talk of girlfriends and phone numbers, she was hesitant to fill in the gaps without him confirming anything. "Are you asking me out?" she asked. "Or do you just want my number to sue me and maybe give you tips on where to find other chicks to hit you with cars?" She was rambling again, which she managed to do when she was out of her comfort zone. Not that she wasn't comfortable with him, because she was. She just didn't want to assume anything because she was having a hard time believing he would want to socialise with her after she hurt him. She chewed on her lip. "I know I totally keep going back to the car thing, but are you sure you even want me here? Why would I think you were stalking me? You can hardly move. Stalking general indicates a form of covert movement."

Peter didn't hesitate before he reached out and cupped her cheek with his good hand. He thought he should have, that there should have been something to make him stop. He held her gaze and gave her another lopsided smile, this one tinged with sadness. "I know it's because you ramble, which is unbelievably cute by the way, but can you please just stop thinking the worst of me? I haven't... I'm not going to sue you, or chase you because you hit me. It was an accident, and I know that. I'm not even really going to try and explain why that's not really phasing me right now. I like you, Randy. Ever since I first saw you. I wasn't so concussed that I didn't notice how beautiful you were. I want your number because I want a chance to get to know you fully conscious." He cleared his throat as his tongue darted out to wet his lips. "Is that okay?"

Randy searched his eyes, her forehead creasing a little. This was unexpected. "You know, this is kind of like one of those Sleepless in Seattle moments. All we're missing is the cheesy music and strange Uncle called Stan or Louis. Like that Sandra Bullock train movie. I nearly kill you, you ask me out on a date, then my weird family gets involved and you start wondering what the fuck you really got involved in..." She trailed off and clamped her mouth shut, pulling her lips in between her teeth. She needed to learn to shut up. She just hadn't been asked out on a date date for awhile. Usually it was just boys she knew at college and they knew how to have a good time. "Yes, it's okay!" she finally added and then cleared her throat.

"Well, alright, then," Peter smirked. "Just so long as we got the okay sorted out. Didn't want to fall flat on my ass. Getting hit by a car is one thing. Getting turned down by a girl hurts even more. I'd rather take this broken arm than a bruised ego." He dropped his hand back away from her face, trailing his fingers down her arm. "Also, I'm pretty sure I can out do you in any weird family stakes. I'll take whatever family you got."

Randy held up her hand. "You might want to reserve judgment on that. My big brother, he might not look scary, but he can be when he wants to. Doesn't even need super powers for it. When it comes to me and Mel, it's just the way it goes," she had to explain apologetically. "But he's nice, I promise. Just might get a little... interregatory."

Peter raised his eyebrows as he chuckled. "Hey, I get it, but am I going to get interrogated before we even have a date? You know, just so I can be prepared."

Randy nodded with a small laugh. "He works here, remember? It might be unavoidable. He knows you're here and what I did. He's going to ask me how you are," she explained.

Peter looked like he didn't exactly remember, but it was more the facing of her brother so soon. He couldn't even remember the last time he'd had to face interrogation from a prospective girlfriend's family. Even Caitlin's brother hadn't been that bad. And Simone had been complicated for other reasons. He also couldn't remember the last time he'd fallen for someone without complications. Being hit by Randy's car was normal compared to the fucked up thing he'd had with Simone, or the amnesiac dependency issues with Caitlin. He didn't think much about either woman now, their memories pushed back into the dark corner of Peter's mind with the rest of turbulent past.

He gave her another lopsided smile and pulled her in closer between his legs as he brushed a kiss against her cheek. "If it means being able to get that date, and see you again, I'll take the interrogation by your brother. And you can tell him I'm fine."

Randy smiled and tilted her head a little. "I don't mean to make him sound terrifying. He's not. Work-wise, you're probably more experienced than him. He's just started his job here after being a student nurse. He's had a bit of a crap time too, lost his first patient and took it hard. Maybe you guys can be friends. I promise he's not an ass. He's just a typical big brother. He works in Surgical and sometimes in the ER. He would probably be relieved to hear I'm... um... sticking to one guy for the moment," she admitted sheepishly. Oh great. She may as well have just shoved a flashy 'I'm a slut' sign on her forehead.

Peter arched his eyebrow a little as he watched her. "You know you don't have to stick to one guy if you don't want to. If... if it's weird, or whatever, you don't need to say yes. I won't be offended. I know, um--" He held his good hand up. "You know what, never mind. I'm taking the yes, and the date, and ignoring the bits in my head that are trying to imagine what I can still get done with one good hand. It's hard losing your first patient. I really feel for him. Having said that, I used to be a hospice nurse. I'm used to losing my patients."

Randy shook her head firmly. "No! That's not what I mean. I'm not a slut, I wouldn't fuck around on anyone. I just... well, I work hard at uni, so I mostly just seek out friends for a bit of fun when I have the time. Guys don't usually... they get pissed when I pick study over them. Which is fair enough. I think it just means I haven't found the right guy yet," she mused and searched his eyes for a few moments. "Do you miss that work?"

Peter's hand came to rest against her hip, his fingers spreading over it as he rubbed his thumb against the soft denim of her jeans. Now that he was feeling better it was genuinely hard not to start thinking about her and 'fun'. "It's been a while for me. The fun part. I do understand how important the studying is, and I'm happy to wait until you have free moments. Your brother's a nurse so you know what kind of hours we work. Not every girl understands that, either." He gazed back at her, happy to sit there as she searched his eyes. He just hoped she wasn't picking up on his deviant streak just yet. "Yeah, I do. My life was a lot easier back then. Times change, and jobs do, too. I'm back to nursing so I can't exactly complain."

Randy raised her eyebrows. "How long is awhile?" For a moment, she thought Peter was similar to her sister, Mel. Same sort of softness and maybe a hint of a reserved nature, though probably with a fun streak inside if the right thing brought it out. Like English footballers. "You don't have to answer that. I'm being a nosey bitch, sorry. Do you work with older people here? Or something different? You would be exactly the sort of nurse I would like caring for my Nana."

"You're not being a nosey bitch," he said with a laugh. "I wouldn't volunteer the information if I didn't want you to know. And it's... a while. Definitely over a few months. Right now I"m in the ICU. I needed a change of pace for a little while. Maybe once I find my feet here I could go back to hospice work. And if your Nana ever needs looking after, I would be happy to take care of her."

A few months. Definitely sounded like Mel. "Where are you going now? Is your brother picking you up? Should you even be alone right after getting out? You shouldn't be. Not with the head thing. And the arm thing. What if you need to pee? How are you going to get in and out of the pants?"

"Back to my apartment," Peter answered. He frowned a little. "No, he isn't. He's... busy. I hadn't actually thought about the pants thing. It's entirely possible I might wind up embracing a nudist lifestyle for a few days."

Randy shook her head. "No, you'll get pneumonia and land right back in here half dead. I can't deal with that guilt. I'm coming to stay with you. I'll sleep on the sofa, and I can cook for you too. Only, you'll have to put up with my sister visiting. She's my twin, so we're kind of a package deal."

"You mentioned that before." Peter looked at her, this time taking his time to search her eyes as if he was trying to work out if she was genuine or not. "You won't let me say no, will you?"

"Fuck, no," Randy confirmed, raising her chin a little as if challenging him to protest. "I can be a huge bitch. A screechy resonant one, too," she said with a cheeky smirk.

"What if I know ways to keep you quiet?" Peter asked, his hand moving around to press against her ass as he pulled her closer against him still. His mouth was dangerously close to hers, and he grinned. "I'll take the package deal, and the crazy family, and the brother, and I'll take you sleeping on my couch and taking care of me because I can't actually imagine anything better right now. I really like you, Randy. Is that okay with you?"

Randy decided this was really nice, and she still couldn't quite believe the bloke she hit with her car was hitting on her. Or that she hit a guy so hot with her car in the first place. Suddenly the random sneeze fest seemed extremely worth it. "I should warn you, I can't actually cook well. Do you like cheese on toast and scrambled eggs?" she asked with a laugh and reached up to brush her thumb along his lower lip, always being the sort to map out boyfriends with her fingertips and locking them into memory. His lips looked nice, and they felt how she imagined. "And I might fuss. I get that off my Mum."

"I have a feeling I'm going to really like them otherwise I might get another broken arm," he teased as he smiled, stilling so she could map him out. He didn't mind. He hadn't ever really had time to just get to know someone like this. It was better than he'd imagined. "I'm sure I can take the fussing. Just so long as you can take me being a little possessive."

Randy laughed, stroking his cheek. "And there you were saying you wouldn't mind me messing around with other guys. See, now I know you were just being polite. But I like that. I wouldn't ever do that, though. I'm honest, and I appreciate the same in return. It's not rocket science. All these people who fuck around on people they supposedly love, it's screwed up. If you want to go to the effort of sleeping with someone else, how is it too much effort to tell the person you're with it's over? The world is full of bastards, it really is."

Peter kissed Randy's temple and smirked. "I like the way you think. It's not too much effort, and I couldn't agree more. So I guess now we know we're not about to go sleeping around on each other... want to help me with my shirt so we can get out of here?"

"Damnit, you got me. I was trying to keep you talking longer so you forgot you had it off," Randy joked, snapping her fingers with a smirk. She reached for the shirt, finding the sleeve to help him get his injured arm into it. "So, are you a typical guy with hardly anything in your fridge? We might need to go shopping on the way home. Or we get you home, and then I'll drag Mel shopping with me."

"Hey, I could walk around like this if you wanted, but I think it might be starting to get cold outside. I think you better get me home, then take your sister. I'm using all my energy being completely charming and sexy right now," Peter admitted with a slightly sheepish look. It was true. He was still feeling a bit lethargic after everything, that strong urge to have his head against a pillow starting to creep up on him. "I think I might need everything but cereal and beer. I seem to have those. And a tomato, but I'm not sure it's even a tomato anymore."

Randy smacked him softly on the arm. "That's shocking bachelor behaviour. Those days are gone, mister. Mark my words." She carefully got him into the shirt and then instead of helping him smooth his hair down, ruffled it up more and then kissed his forehead. "Time to go test my nursing skills against my brother's. I'm so going to win because it's vital to always beat the big brother."

Peter smirked. "I know how that goes, so I'll try and be a cooperative patient. I've even got some scrubs you can wear if you really want to get into the part." Peter stole a quick kiss on the lips before slipping from the bed onto his feet. He ignored the head spin, and took a deep breath. "So you're already planning to take me off the bachelor market? Interesting, Ms Murray. Very interesting."

Randy shot him a devious grin. "Hey, I don't share, Petrelli, and I'm not polite about it." She patted her butt. "Think I'd suit the scrubs? Have we tapped into a lil fetish, Nurse?" She got his jacket off the bed, wrapping it around his shoulders and holding him securely, not missing the hint of unsteadiness. "Are you okay, love? You don't have to walk out there, you know. We can get you a wheelchair just to get back to the car. It might be a better idea."

"Oh yeah? Get a little rough, do you? I think I might just like you even more." Peter licked his lips, his smirk increasing as he just looked at her. "Maybe. I think you'd look hot in my scrubs. And no, no wheelchair. I'm not giving up this chance to stick close to you. I'm okay, just got up too quick. Spent a long time flat on my back, and not in the fun way."

"Good, because if you're still not feeling well, I'll make sure you're still on your back when you get home, and not in the fun way. I can play the Evil Nurse Evilness card." Randy quickly checked the room to make sure all his belongings were in the patient bag and he hadn't left anything important behind. She squeezed his waist a little. "Okay, I think you're ready to go. Your loss, I don't get to spin you around the corners in the chair, maybe make some mean car noises in the process."

"I'm shaking in my trainers," Peter promised as he chuckled. He lifted his bad arm like he wanted to do something, but had to drop it. The cast was already starting to get on his nerves again. "Next time you land me in hospital we can get a wheel chair and you can make the car noises."

Randy laughed and patted his arse. "You got a deal, Nurse."

Words: 4319 | All muses referred to with permission and come from the princeton2nyc verse

musesandlyrics | 2.11 A Perfect Murder Quote

2009-09-16T07:06:49Z

2.11. "When you wake up tomorrow, all this will seem like a bad dream."
A Perfect Murder

Co-written with randybyname

Peter Petrelli was trying for once to get some normality back in his life. Ironic given he had a new ability to content with. He'd had his chance at normal when his father had taken his original ability, but the timing had been off. He couldn't exactly bail while his father and Pinehearst existed, he'd also had to get an ability back, and lucky for him Suresh's formula had given him a variation of his original power. Only now he wasn't so much a sponge. He could pick and choose, and only kept one ability at a time.

Only in the face of finally defeating Sylar, Peter had needed an out. He needed normality, and he needed to leave the City that had been his home for so long. He needed somewhere he wasn't just Nathan Petrelli's brother, or Angela Petrelli's son. He wasn't the guy who had almost blown up New York. He wasn't a fugitive. He wasn't even a hero.

New Jersey wasn't so far away that he couldn't return to New York if he was needed, and Princeton Plainsboro Teaching Hospital had given him a job as a nurse. It was returning to something that he used to love. Something that once upon a time he had been happy to define him. He'd never been ashamed of being a nurse, but the rest of his family had been. As much as he loved them, Peter still needed to find out exactly who he was. Things had been changing so quickly, he'd lost track.

He crossed the street to the hospital, courier bag slung across his body. It was his second week on the job, and he was starting to find his rhythm. In fact, he was even looking forward to it. He didn't have a huge burden on his shoulders from needing to the save the world, or to change the future. For once, he didn't know what the future would hold.

Randy had been trying to get a hold of Mel after her sister left her a voicemail about the footballer. She had been in a meeting with one of her new teachers for the semester when the call came in, so she had missed it, and now she was just dying to know how the whole thing went down. After leaving a return message on her sister's voicemail, Randy had tossed her cell phone onto the passenger's seat of her car and started heading out of the university to head home. Sure, it was all probably technically in walking distance, but not when she had a gazillion heavy text books to lug around with her. She had just stopped by the bookshop on campus to collect the last of what she needed for her final year. She was distracted, and she knew it. Plus, her head was sore and her nose was itchy, almost like she felt when she was getting a cold.

She scratched at her nose as she turned out of the university and onto the street. The hospital, and Matty's workplace was just a few blocks away because it was attached to the university and one of the biggest places med students went for their prac. Randy herself would probably even end up there when she started practicing. It suited her. She loved Princeton. She had never been a big city girl to pull off living in New York. It never much appealled to her. It was just when she was turning onto the main street leading to her neighbourhood that she was overcome in a wave of sneezes that took her by surprise. She didn't even have a chance to hit the brakes, which panicked her. But only for a second before she heard a loud thump as the last sneeze wracked her body and she screamed, hitting the brakes, but it was too late. Did she just hit someone?

"Oh my god, oh my god, no!" she whimpered, struggling to fumble out of her seatbelt in her haste. Her heart was up in her throat as she threw herself out of the car and stumbled around to the front of it. Another scream was cut off in a terrified gasp of shock. A guy was lying on the road in front of her car. She had hit someone with her car! "Oh shit! Oh my god! Are you okay?" She crouched down beside him, her hands trembling as she started to cry. Was he even conscious?!

Peter hadn't even really noticed the car, his iPod on, and his head clearly not on where he was going. He'd had a brief glance either way to check for any speeding cars, but he hadn't noticed the one that had hit him. He also wasn't sure how long he'd been out. There was a brief moment when everything had gone black, and then as if to make the pain worse for him, the world around him came piercing back in glaring sunlight, and muffled sounds. He grunted, trying to move to sit up. The back of his head was aching, and he was sure someone was stabbing him in the arm, or maybe his arm wasn't even attached.

Okay, so maybe there was a downside to not having his old power. He couldn't heal. He couldn't get up from this without a scratch. He'd survived a fall from a building without dying, but getting hit by a car? That was going to be the end of him. Peter grunted again, adding a couple of curses.

"No, no, no! Don't move! My brother's a nurse!" Randy cried, holding her hands out. What the fuck? What did the fact her brother was a nurse have anything to damn well do with it? It wasn't like she could whip Matt out of her handbag to do his nurse thing, or that his nursing skills were suddenly going to rub off on her! But she was panicked. That was her excuse for being hit with the stupid stick, and she wasn't budging from it. "My phone... I need my fucking phone..." she mumbled to herself and batted her hair out of her face and threw it over her shoulder. Why hadn't the Karma gods told her that morning to wear her hair back in preparation of hitting some poor bastard with her car?! She made another whimpering sound, sort of just hovering there as she tried to figure out what the hell to do. What did they do in the movies? That had to at least be a start, right? "I'm sorry!" she finally said, her voice raising a even further as she tried not to cry even more or maybe even wet her pants.

Peter wiggled the fingers on his other hand to test to see if he could at least feel them. At the sound of a woman's voice, he tried to open his eyes again. He caught a flash of blonde hair, and for a moment he thought Claire was there. Then he focused his eyes, and realised it wasn't his niece. He reached out, his fingers gripping her wrist. "Hurts..." he choked out.

No, he wasn't supposed to say that! It was supposed to be just a scratch so she didn't want to give herself a guilt-induced stroke. She touched his forehead lightly with her fingertips. "Do you need an ambulance? I should get an ambulance! I just need to find my phone. Why isn't anyone else driving on this road right now?! This is one of the busiest roads in Princeton and no one is fucking around to help a stupid cow out when she runs over someone! Oh god, I'm an attempted murderer!" She dragged her hair back off her face again when it infuriatingly flopped forward again into her eyes.

"I'm going to get my phone, okay?" she told him, leaning over him and managing to shield the light from his eyes. "You're not allowed to die on me or even do anything that stops you breathing! I'm not like my brother. I would really suck at CPR! So just... are you okay? I would offer you a pillow, but I don't have one." She pointed behind her. "I just have to get my phone. I can call an ambulance or my sister, because sister is really much more smarter than I am when it comes to shit like this. And to think I was going to be a babysitter..." she mumbled to herself, almost losing her balance where she was crouched beside him.

Peter tried to shake his head, but it hurt too much. "No, don't... I've got a phone. It's in my bag." Slowly he was starting to remember how to how to put sentences together. He was also starting to realise just which parts of him hurt. He highly suspected his arm was broken, and he was going to wind up with a massive lump on the back of his head. He couldn't take her panicking, though. He held onto her hand again, trying to get out a soothing noise, but it came out like a wheeze. "Please don't freak out. I'm okay. Just beaten up a little. Really not planning on dying here, promise. Just take a breath, okay?"

Randy looked down at him, wiping at her tears with her other hand. Now that she had stopped momentarily, she noticed something beyond him being a body sprawled on the road... he was cute. Oh hell, she was going to hell. Was she perving on someone she just nearly killed?! She tried to picture him with different colour hair, because the brunette hadn't been lost on her. "I'm supposed to be comforting you, that's the way it works when you get squished by a car. Unless it's a hit and run, but I wouldn't do that! I'm not some sort of murderer! I'm sorry I hurt you. I know it hurts. I broke my arm once when I was a kid, and then my sister broke hers the next day like some sort of freak twin thing, but it hurt like hell."

She was rambling and she knew it. She squeezed his hand and then released it to start digging around in his bag, paying absolutely no mind that she was rifling around in his personal things. Soon the entire contents of his bag were up-ended on the road side and she located the phone. "There's a really awesome hospital not far from here. I bet the ambulance comes right away. I'll come with you, my brother works there. I mean, if you want me to. You probably don't want anything to fucking do with me because I nearly killed you, right? I'll be quiet. I'll just, like, hover in the hallway until I know you're okay then bugger off before you can see me again. What's the number for the ambulance again?" She paused and cursed, pressing in 911 quickly. "Shit, don't answer that. I'm clearly losing my mind." She put the phone to her ear, waiting for the call to the connect. "I'm Randy by the way. O-Or Miranda Rose. Miranda Rose Murray in case you want to press charges."

Peter gave her a weak smirk, closing his eyes for a moment as he tried to block out the light again. The rambling was actually a comfort. Like something he could hang onto to make sure he didn't slip into unconsciousness. Not that closing his eyes was helping. He reluctantly opened them again, trying to watch her. She was pretty, he wasn't in so much pain that he didn't notice. He was kind of hating the fact that he was meeting her under these conditions. It had been a long, long time since he'd flirted with anyone. It was hard to flirt when it felt like he'd just been hit by a car.

Okay, he had been hit by a car.

"I'm not going to press charges, Randy. Also not going to make any Austin Powers jokes. Mostly because I think laughing would make me hurt more. I'm Peter. Peter Petrelli. In case you want to come visit me in hospital. You don't need to be nervous. I'm okay. Just hurting."

Randy put the call in with the paramedics, giving them Peter's name and the location. She put his phone back into his bag, even though she had emptied it of everything else. "It's okay. It's a running joke in my family. I'm a bit of a tom boy, so I didn't want the girly name when I was a kid, so it just stuck. I figured if it was good enough for one of the Jackson 5, it was good enough for me." She took his hand again and automatically started to carefully stroke his hair to try and make him feel better. "I really am sorry. I think I'm getting a cold or something and I was sneezing, and it was just bad timing. Are you seeing double? Do you feel sick? You don't look so good. Want me to lie down with you? I don't even have a band-aid to offer you."

Peter wanted to tell her to take another breath, but he had a feeling the fact that his head started to spin had nothing to do with how fast she was talking. "Ah... no double, yeah a little, that's so tempting, and it's okay about the band-aid. Not even sure it'd do much right now. You like the Jackson 5?"

"Well, technically no. I mean, Michael is okay, but the others didn't do much for me. But he was famous, and he was a boy, so I could talk myself into it being exactly what I wanted. There isn't a lot of non-girly names you can drag from Miranda Rose, and my brother and sister used to pull the piss even more by calling me Rosie because they knew it drove me up the wall. Only, when you hit puberty, Randy goes from an innocent boy's name to a not-so-innocent context. Like, when someone says balls and you really want to not snigger, but you do anyway." Randy was never the sort to be conventional, so she actually did shift and lie down on the road next to him, still holding his hand. "Did I mention my brother was a nurse? Which is beside the point, but he has friends who are doctors in the ER, so you're going to be fine. I'm going to probably keep saying that to try and convince myself because I'm so so sorry I hit you. I've probably ruined your whole week now."

"Yeah, you did mention your brother was a nurse. Several times if my memory's still working." Peter smiled, amused at the fact that she was lying in the road with him. He was trying to listen for the sound of sirens, but given they were near a hospital, it was hard to tell if any of them were for him yet. For all he knew they wouldn't bother with sirens. "It's funny, because I happen to be a nurse, too. It's been a while since I've been hurt."

Randy winced slightly. "Sorry, I don't mean to try and fly a flag out his ass, even if I do think he's awesome. I mean, he's my big brother. Of course he's awesome. I just... my brain seems to think telling you that will bring you medical attention quicker, and you're seriously a nurse? Maybe you know him? Do you work at Princeton Plainsboro? Only, he's only been there a short time. He finished Yale and then had a placement back there before getting the job here. But he's home now and I'm glad he is." There were sirens coming in the distance and she prayed they were for them. "Awhile? How long's a while? Now I've gone and screwed up your track record, which bloody sucks. I'm sorry!"

"It's okay," Peter murmured, his concentration lapsing as the urge to close his eyes returned with force. He fought it off, squeezing Randy's hand as he looked at her again. "I have a big brother. I'm sure I'm guilty of the same thing. Or I was. Guess we grew apart." He frowned, the thought of Nathan Petrelli giving him mixed feelings. He had idolised his brother once upon a time. "Yeah, I work at the same hospital. Not sure I know your brother, but maybe. I'm still learning who everyone is. I'm just as new. It's good you got your brother again. Lucky. You sound like you really care about him. Being that close to family is a rare thing."

"You sound sad," Randy noted. "Not just because your head hurts, either." She raised up a little to see his face, taking in his features a little more with a concerned frown on her face. "Did you lose your brother?" she asked, hearing the sirens closing in a little.

Peter met her gaze briefly before he looked past her and focused on a passing cloud. "It's complicated." He'd lost his brother a couple of times, and had no idea how he was ever going to explain it to her. "I'm sorry... it's just a long story, and I'd rather not drag this, ah, meeting down."

Randy managed to not point out the fact that it was already pretty much rock bottom considering she hit him with her car, he was bleeding, waiting for an ambulance and lying on a dirty road. But she caught herself and bit down on her lip. She knew he wasn't one of her test subjects. If he didn't want to talk about something, he didn't have to, especially not to her. She didn't get a chance to say anything else when the ambulance pulled up and the paramedics were swooping on them. She pulled herself up off the ground and stood back, chewing on the tip of her thumb as she watched. Why did she feel some sort of connection to this guy?

Peter tried to hold Randy's gaze, even as the paramedics worked around him. There was just something about her, and he needed to keep looking at her to give himself something to keep grounded, and to keep conscious. He hoped she did find him, because even struggling with the pain, and even after she'd hit him with her car, he wanted to see her again. Peter understood better than most that Fate had a funny way of working. "Randy," he rasped, just before he got loaded into the ambulance.

"I'll just... um... just..." Randy stammered, panicking a little as she pointed back to her car. She tugged on the female paramedics arm. "Can you just wait a second?" She didn't wait for an answer. She ran back to her car and plucked the keys from the ignition, grabbing up her phone from where it fell onto the passenger side floor and then locked the car. She was back in moments, wringing the strap of her bag anxiously. "I'm coming," she insisted and climbed into the back of the ambulance after him before they could all tell her to get fucked. She expected protests, but none came, so she just grabbed Peter's hand again, swallowing. She had no explanation why she was doing this. She just was, and to the fuck with it.

Words: 3229 | All muses referred to with permission

musebysentence | 3.1 Sex

2009-08-10T21:35:19Z

It's been a while.

just_muse_me | 21.2.5. Better to have loved and lost than never to have loved at all

2009-06-17T01:57:12Z

[Set during 3x21 'Into Asylum']

As he sat with his mother, Peter wondered if it was better or worse that he didn't have anyone. He didn’t even have his brother these days. It was ironic, or maybe just plain amusing that he was comforting the one woman he thought he would never be close to again.

Things with Simone had been beyond messy. Things with Elle had been fucked up, and a lie. He’d played along to try and get out. He wasn’t that guy. Things with Caitlin had been confusing, and if he were honest – fleeting. He never thought about her anymore. He never thought about any of them. Nothing stuck, other than chalking it all up to a couple of years he’d rather forget for the most part.

All of it hurt. Maybe that was why he didn’t think about them. It just hurt too much. He could occasionally manage to save the world, but getting his love life functioning was apparently too much to ask. Maybe heroes weren’t ever meant to have a true happy ending. Saving the world was supposed to be thanks enough.

His gaze slipped from his sleeping mother to the front of the church, and he frowned a little at the carving of Jesus. He didn’t even have God, and as a Catholic that was a pretty big blow. He could sit there and list everyone he’d lost, and he struggled to name anyone who’d stayed his life bar Matt Parkman, and maybe Noah Bennet. Peter hadn’t even spoken to his niece in recent months, but it was for the best. She shouldn’t have been dragged into this. But she was Claire, and Peter could only assume she was still getting herself into trouble regardless of whether she was dragged into things, or not. She was his brother’s daughter; she was also Noah Bennet’s adoptive daughter. Staying out of trouble was never going to be in her blood.

Still, Peter wondered what it would like to have someone. Matt had Daphne, Noah had his wife. They both had reasons to push through this, to keep going. What did Peter have? He shifted on the wooden pew and let out a quiet sigh. Right now he had hiding out in a church with his mother who’d finally relaxed enough to sleep.

Peter couldn’t sleep. He also couldn’t quit what they’d started. If nothing else he had a determination to see this through because he was done being the dreamer; the one they all expected to quit when it got hard. He also didn’t really want to see any version of the future come to fruition. Not the ones he’d been privy to, the ones his future self had seen.

Peter shook his head a little. Yeah, he also had the fact that his life was fucked up enough to allow a future version of himself to travel back. He wasn’t even going to begin on that. It did occur to him that maybe his future self was so uptight because he’d gone that long without getting laid.

The inappropriate line of thinking had Peter smiling, and he glanced back up at the Jesus. Yeah, he was going to Hell. He didn’t even have to know God was there or not to realise thinking about sex in church was probably not doing him any favours.

His mother made a noise and he shifted his gaze to her. Hopefully, if she was dreaming, it would be something pleasant. Peter was still hopeful enough to wish that for her. He was her son, after all. He didn’t always hate her; he didn’t always want her to suffer. There were moments when she deserved his protection.

So maybe right now he did have his mother, and that was enough to get through another couple of hours. He’d work out the rest when the next crisis came.

Peter Petrelli
Heroes
Words: 643

Not binding on any muses.

For just_muse_me - Past Prompt - 2.4.3 TEN Mistakes

2009-02-16T04:53:19Z

01. Jumping off that building. While it did ultimately prove that I was right... I could have done without time in hospital.

02. Going to the Company for help.

03. Thinking I could take on Sylar before I was ready.

04. Thinking I could save the world. I don’t really know how to explain it... Yes, I saved New York with Nathan’s help, but I think I maybe lost my brother. I’m still not sure it’s a price I can pay.

05. Going to Pinehearst and seeing my father alive... letting him hug me.

06. Trusting my parents.

07. Believing Caitlin when she said it didn’t matter who I had been, but who I was in Ireland... with her.

08. Trusting Adam.

09. Thinking I could save the world... again. Pretty sure I just made it all worse. No one ever seems to believe me when I try and tell them that the future is not what we think.

10. Simone.

Peter Petrelli
Heroes

Not binding on any muses, merely using canon.