[OOC] Application
Section I: *THE APPLICANT*
1. Name/Handle: Nika
2. Contact Details: patena@gmail.com (email/gtalk/AIM)
3. Personal LJ:
schmot_gurl
Section II: *THE CHARACTER*
1. Fandom: Shards of Honor by Lois McMaster Bujold (book, first part of a longer series)
2. Character Name: Cordelia Naismith
3a. Background/History Link: Bio from Vorkosigan Wiki
3b. Conscripted Background: (See the Third-Person Sample for some details)
Cordelia was shocked at the method used to bring them here - and it said something about her that the violation of human rights shocked her more than her first exposure to magic. But she adapted quickly. This was an environment she could deal with, as long as she could get away with shooting to disable, not kill (although soul resurrection made that a rather moot point, didn't it?). She could certainly deal with it better than many of the other recruits, and her humanitarian instincts didn't leave her the choice of standing on the side and watching. She annoyed a lot of the more bloody-minded people by standing up for anyone she believed needed help, defying her superiors without a second thought, and getting away with it more often than not. Her calm attempts at finding the best solution were strangely difficult to argue with.
After the initial flood of complaints and punishments - which she took without argument, as long as she could see a way of working around them to do what she needed - her superiors started realizing she was actually being useful. Most of the problem cases she took under her wing were doing better because of it. She spent her free time providing extra training as often as advice and comfort; she was competent, and understood the need for discipline, if not always the specific rules. The best thing to do seemed to give her an officer position that fit with her natural inclinations, and let her do what she was clearly good at.
4. Point in Canon: while escaping from Beta (after Chapter 13 of Shards Of Honor)
5. Personality:
Cordelia is a complex person, full of what may seem like contradictions. She will follow her own conscience regardless of what is reasonable or painless or easy, no matter the reactions of the people around her. She's honest with herself to the point of pain, and always willing to revisit her assumptions and consider a different point of view. Sometimes her resolve and her unconventional decisions make her look heroic; sometimes they make her look insane. It's not that she doesn't care what people think - but in the end, she can imagine no choice except to do what she thinks is right.
Raised in the extremely humane, tolerant and egalitarian Betan society, she has a very civilized point of view. She sees barbarism and cruelty in what others would consider facts of life. She will be shocked at the notion of peasant children not having access to computers and higher education, and it won't even occur to her they might be missing more basic things, food, medical care. It may make people see her as soft, they will be surprised. She may be shocked, but she adapts quickly. Smart, tough-minded and unconventional, she's likely to find a way to deal with any problem on her own terms.
She has a way of growing to match the situation. She takes difficulties and challenges with - not calm, but something like acceptance. Every test is a gift. She doesn't pointlessly argue with the world, she takes what is and works to make it better. Not just as much as she can - as much as is needed, without putting a limit on her ability. She will shoulder nearly impossible tasks without a thought of refusal. She takes care of her people - and of strangers - and of enemy soldiers, trying to protect all sides at once. She's incapable of telling herself someone is beyond saving or doesn't deserve a chance at redemption. If anything, she is drawn to the broken and the scarred. She can make friends anywhere.
Cordelia's secret is that looks for the best in people - and gives them her best in return. She's by no means naive, but willing to take the risk. "You trust beyond reason", a friend accused her once, and she answered: "That's how I get results beyond hope." If someone gives her their word, she will trust it even if it doesn't seem wise - and often enough, just the weight of having someone like her believe in them will make them keep it. But she won't condemn them even if they don't. She believes in redemption, in changing and starting over, no matter what came before.
Just as she can find something good in anyone, she can find humor, happiness, grace in the worst situation. She believes there is a point, or struggles to make one. She believes in God, or at least some higher power over the universe, something to hold us responsible for our actions and to grant forgiveness. But this faith doesn't make things any easier. She doesn't believe in anything as simple as honor, or absolute good and evil. There are no clear rules, just- "Most days it's just stumbling around in the dark with the rest of creation, smashing into things and wondering why it hurts." And yet, even when she feels lost, to most people she seems like an angel of hope.
Even though she tries to be wary around others, to protect herself, she isn't hard to draw out. She has been hurt before, lied to, used and discarded - but it's in her nature to give to others, and anyone with eyes can see it, even when she can't. "You pour out honor like a fountain, all around you." Cordelia: "That's weird. I don't feel full of honor, or anything else, except maybe confusion." "Naturally not. Fountains keep nothing for themselves."
No matter how hard she tries to work things out without irrevocable harm, no matter how much she thinks of herself as civilized and peace-loving, faced with life-and-death decisions, she will fight and kill ruthlessly. Doing things halfway doesn't win wars. Even when hurt beyond bearing, she has no stomach for revenge, only for doing what must be done - but even hardened warriors will sometimes flinch at what she sees as necessary.
She doesn't approve of the military, in principle, but she can deal with them. She knows discipline and rank - she was captain of a scientific exploration ship, then a military one when her planet went to war. Even though she detests much of the pointless glitter and ceremony, the artificial notions of right and wrong, her basic instincts have something in common with the warrior ethic, much as she denies it. Soldiers don't impress her, but she, more often than not, impresses them. Leaves them with the vague feeling that they should be following her orders.
Faced with something to do, she does it as well as she can, puts the panic off until later, and manages not only calm and resourcefulness but an appeareance of control. Her dry, terse sense of humor comes out in the worst circumstances as often as in the best, and doesn't shrink from the dark side of things.
6. Class: Harrier
7. Abilities:
Cordelia doesn't have and supernatural powers or more-than-human abilities.
She can fight, and do it well, if she has to. She's in very good physical form. Trained to shoot most types of guns as well as fight hand-to-hand.
However, most of her assets are intellectual, not physical. She's had a great scientific education strengthened with years of practice. She was a captain in the Betan Exploratory Survey - her job was to discover new planets and new wormhole jumps, and she was well trained to deal with anything she might find. She's a good strategist, tough-minded and practical, although she doesn't value practicality above ethics. Thinks well on her feet, easily adapts to the strangest situations, and uses whatever tools she has.
Cordelia reads people extremely well, and can often bring out the best in them - half-insane violent criminals included. She's good at solving interpresonal problems and figuring out how to approach people to convince them of what she thinks is right. She inspires others with her own honesty and altruism.
8. Preferred Army: Valora
9. Preferred Position: Officer
Section III: *SAMPLES*
1. First-person Sample:
[voice]
You're doing what? [Any civilized person would be shocked at what's going on here - but she calms down quickly. No point in shouting.]
...
Even ignoring your improbable description of this "technology" - you do realize this is unlikely to work. How do you expect these people to be loyal to you? [Her tone is that of an honest question, not sarcasm. She's trying to make sense of all this, hoping against the apparent odds that it does make some kind of sense.]
2. Third-person Sample:
Cordelia stared at the training grounds, filled with uneven ranks of 'soldiers': adults mixed with children, the strong mixed with the weak and the strangely inhuman. She was beginning to understand war, but surely this wasn't the right way to go about it? She caught herself assuming there was a right way to fight a war, and shuddered. She used to think so - that there could be purely defensive war, fought cleanly, civilized. But she had found out how easily civilization is stripped off in the confusion. How impossible it is to maintain a clear division between the sides. How impossible to be completely right or completely wrong.
Still, irrational as it seemed to her, war happened, and the best you could do was try to keep your head in the confusion, cling to your principles despite the disorienting changes of all moral direction. It worked, sometimes. She had no desire to be part of this, but neither could she refuse the test, she decided - or rather, she realized the decision was already made, as she saw one of the new recruits struggle with the exercise. She didn't make it across the field before one of the instructors started shouting at the boy, only causing his panicked breaths to come in larger gulps. Hyperventilation really wasn't helping anything.
"Sir." She calmly interposed her slim form between the officer and the young man, the steely look in her eyes belying her lack of rank. "He's having a panic attack. It's a medical condition, not a failure of discipline." Did these people not realize the effects of the stress they were putting these recruits through? "No matter what you do, he's not going to be of any use to you for the next half hour." And what are you planning to do about it? - his glance said, a small seed of curiosity mixed in with the annoyance and contempt. Steady, she thought. I can give him a solution. "I know this exercise. If you let me take him to the infirmary and calm him down, I'll make sure he can do it before the next training period." The boy squeaked in protest, but she stared him down with a single glance. If he expected her to condone his helpless act for longer than medically necessary, he was going to have to think again. God helps those who help themselves, kid.
By the end of the month, the count of thankful notes written about her to the commander almost rivaled the count of complaints. Luckily, the powers that be eventually turned out to be at least competent enough to make use of her. "You've been getting way above your station, soldier." Oh, you noticed? - she thought but didn't say. No sense in antagonizing these people. The man kept going. "You can either shut up, or take a job that would give you the right to do all this. On our terms." She took her time, thinking through the possible consequences - but yes, of course she would take it, if those terms were anything near bearable.
1. Name/Handle: Nika
2. Contact Details: patena@gmail.com (email/gtalk/AIM)
3. Personal LJ:
schmot_gurlSection II: *THE CHARACTER*
1. Fandom: Shards of Honor by Lois McMaster Bujold (book, first part of a longer series)
2. Character Name: Cordelia Naismith
3a. Background/History Link: Bio from Vorkosigan Wiki
3b. Conscripted Background: (See the Third-Person Sample for some details)
Cordelia was shocked at the method used to bring them here - and it said something about her that the violation of human rights shocked her more than her first exposure to magic. But she adapted quickly. This was an environment she could deal with, as long as she could get away with shooting to disable, not kill (although soul resurrection made that a rather moot point, didn't it?). She could certainly deal with it better than many of the other recruits, and her humanitarian instincts didn't leave her the choice of standing on the side and watching. She annoyed a lot of the more bloody-minded people by standing up for anyone she believed needed help, defying her superiors without a second thought, and getting away with it more often than not. Her calm attempts at finding the best solution were strangely difficult to argue with.
After the initial flood of complaints and punishments - which she took without argument, as long as she could see a way of working around them to do what she needed - her superiors started realizing she was actually being useful. Most of the problem cases she took under her wing were doing better because of it. She spent her free time providing extra training as often as advice and comfort; she was competent, and understood the need for discipline, if not always the specific rules. The best thing to do seemed to give her an officer position that fit with her natural inclinations, and let her do what she was clearly good at.
4. Point in Canon: while escaping from Beta (after Chapter 13 of Shards Of Honor)
5. Personality:
Cordelia is a complex person, full of what may seem like contradictions. She will follow her own conscience regardless of what is reasonable or painless or easy, no matter the reactions of the people around her. She's honest with herself to the point of pain, and always willing to revisit her assumptions and consider a different point of view. Sometimes her resolve and her unconventional decisions make her look heroic; sometimes they make her look insane. It's not that she doesn't care what people think - but in the end, she can imagine no choice except to do what she thinks is right.
Raised in the extremely humane, tolerant and egalitarian Betan society, she has a very civilized point of view. She sees barbarism and cruelty in what others would consider facts of life. She will be shocked at the notion of peasant children not having access to computers and higher education, and it won't even occur to her they might be missing more basic things, food, medical care. It may make people see her as soft, they will be surprised. She may be shocked, but she adapts quickly. Smart, tough-minded and unconventional, she's likely to find a way to deal with any problem on her own terms.
She has a way of growing to match the situation. She takes difficulties and challenges with - not calm, but something like acceptance. Every test is a gift. She doesn't pointlessly argue with the world, she takes what is and works to make it better. Not just as much as she can - as much as is needed, without putting a limit on her ability. She will shoulder nearly impossible tasks without a thought of refusal. She takes care of her people - and of strangers - and of enemy soldiers, trying to protect all sides at once. She's incapable of telling herself someone is beyond saving or doesn't deserve a chance at redemption. If anything, she is drawn to the broken and the scarred. She can make friends anywhere.
Cordelia's secret is that looks for the best in people - and gives them her best in return. She's by no means naive, but willing to take the risk. "You trust beyond reason", a friend accused her once, and she answered: "That's how I get results beyond hope." If someone gives her their word, she will trust it even if it doesn't seem wise - and often enough, just the weight of having someone like her believe in them will make them keep it. But she won't condemn them even if they don't. She believes in redemption, in changing and starting over, no matter what came before.
Just as she can find something good in anyone, she can find humor, happiness, grace in the worst situation. She believes there is a point, or struggles to make one. She believes in God, or at least some higher power over the universe, something to hold us responsible for our actions and to grant forgiveness. But this faith doesn't make things any easier. She doesn't believe in anything as simple as honor, or absolute good and evil. There are no clear rules, just- "Most days it's just stumbling around in the dark with the rest of creation, smashing into things and wondering why it hurts." And yet, even when she feels lost, to most people she seems like an angel of hope.
Even though she tries to be wary around others, to protect herself, she isn't hard to draw out. She has been hurt before, lied to, used and discarded - but it's in her nature to give to others, and anyone with eyes can see it, even when she can't. "You pour out honor like a fountain, all around you." Cordelia: "That's weird. I don't feel full of honor, or anything else, except maybe confusion." "Naturally not. Fountains keep nothing for themselves."
No matter how hard she tries to work things out without irrevocable harm, no matter how much she thinks of herself as civilized and peace-loving, faced with life-and-death decisions, she will fight and kill ruthlessly. Doing things halfway doesn't win wars. Even when hurt beyond bearing, she has no stomach for revenge, only for doing what must be done - but even hardened warriors will sometimes flinch at what she sees as necessary.
She doesn't approve of the military, in principle, but she can deal with them. She knows discipline and rank - she was captain of a scientific exploration ship, then a military one when her planet went to war. Even though she detests much of the pointless glitter and ceremony, the artificial notions of right and wrong, her basic instincts have something in common with the warrior ethic, much as she denies it. Soldiers don't impress her, but she, more often than not, impresses them. Leaves them with the vague feeling that they should be following her orders.
Faced with something to do, she does it as well as she can, puts the panic off until later, and manages not only calm and resourcefulness but an appeareance of control. Her dry, terse sense of humor comes out in the worst circumstances as often as in the best, and doesn't shrink from the dark side of things.
6. Class: Harrier
7. Abilities:
Cordelia doesn't have and supernatural powers or more-than-human abilities.
She can fight, and do it well, if she has to. She's in very good physical form. Trained to shoot most types of guns as well as fight hand-to-hand.
However, most of her assets are intellectual, not physical. She's had a great scientific education strengthened with years of practice. She was a captain in the Betan Exploratory Survey - her job was to discover new planets and new wormhole jumps, and she was well trained to deal with anything she might find. She's a good strategist, tough-minded and practical, although she doesn't value practicality above ethics. Thinks well on her feet, easily adapts to the strangest situations, and uses whatever tools she has.
Cordelia reads people extremely well, and can often bring out the best in them - half-insane violent criminals included. She's good at solving interpresonal problems and figuring out how to approach people to convince them of what she thinks is right. She inspires others with her own honesty and altruism.
8. Preferred Army: Valora
9. Preferred Position: Officer
Section III: *SAMPLES*
1. First-person Sample:
[voice]
You're doing what? [Any civilized person would be shocked at what's going on here - but she calms down quickly. No point in shouting.]
...
Even ignoring your improbable description of this "technology" - you do realize this is unlikely to work. How do you expect these people to be loyal to you? [Her tone is that of an honest question, not sarcasm. She's trying to make sense of all this, hoping against the apparent odds that it does make some kind of sense.]
2. Third-person Sample:
Cordelia stared at the training grounds, filled with uneven ranks of 'soldiers': adults mixed with children, the strong mixed with the weak and the strangely inhuman. She was beginning to understand war, but surely this wasn't the right way to go about it? She caught herself assuming there was a right way to fight a war, and shuddered. She used to think so - that there could be purely defensive war, fought cleanly, civilized. But she had found out how easily civilization is stripped off in the confusion. How impossible it is to maintain a clear division between the sides. How impossible to be completely right or completely wrong.
Still, irrational as it seemed to her, war happened, and the best you could do was try to keep your head in the confusion, cling to your principles despite the disorienting changes of all moral direction. It worked, sometimes. She had no desire to be part of this, but neither could she refuse the test, she decided - or rather, she realized the decision was already made, as she saw one of the new recruits struggle with the exercise. She didn't make it across the field before one of the instructors started shouting at the boy, only causing his panicked breaths to come in larger gulps. Hyperventilation really wasn't helping anything.
"Sir." She calmly interposed her slim form between the officer and the young man, the steely look in her eyes belying her lack of rank. "He's having a panic attack. It's a medical condition, not a failure of discipline." Did these people not realize the effects of the stress they were putting these recruits through? "No matter what you do, he's not going to be of any use to you for the next half hour." And what are you planning to do about it? - his glance said, a small seed of curiosity mixed in with the annoyance and contempt. Steady, she thought. I can give him a solution. "I know this exercise. If you let me take him to the infirmary and calm him down, I'll make sure he can do it before the next training period." The boy squeaked in protest, but she stared him down with a single glance. If he expected her to condone his helpless act for longer than medically necessary, he was going to have to think again. God helps those who help themselves, kid.
By the end of the month, the count of thankful notes written about her to the commander almost rivaled the count of complaints. Luckily, the powers that be eventually turned out to be at least competent enough to make use of her. "You've been getting way above your station, soldier." Oh, you noticed? - she thought but didn't say. No sense in antagonizing these people. The man kept going. "You can either shut up, or take a job that would give you the right to do all this. On our terms." She took her time, thinking through the possible consequences - but yes, of course she would take it, if those terms were anything near bearable.