Not a Broken Cis Person

Ugh.

ftmichael — Tue, 30 Oct 2012 17:16:36 GMT

LiveJournal is continuing in its quest to be Facebook and Tumblr simultaneously, thereby driving even more people away. I haven't seen any screenshots of this new "release" (read: train wreck), but it sounds like they're going to make all friends pages uniform and remove a ton of customizability.

Unsurprisingly, people are not happy about this. As I write this there are 525 comments, about 14 hours after the notice was posted. The first comment links to this article, which states that LJ has almost completely eliminated any presence in the US and is pretty much entirely under Russian management now. That doesn't have to be a bad thing, and I find it hard to believe that the Russians are any happier about UI changes like these, but it feels like something that LJ users should know, especially English-speaking users. The article links to another couple of articles discussing the LJ diaspora and tracking LJ's decline.

I have no plans to leave LJ, but I'm pretty unimpressed. It makes me want to give up my paid account so I'm not funding their continual stupidity, but I do like the handful of perks that my paid membership gets me. I'm rather torn. I won't be leaving LJ though; I've been here for over 12 years and I have a whole lot of my life stored on their servers so I'll stay as long as I can.

But now it's time to save a fresh backup of my entire journal via http://ljbook.com/ , if I can get it to work ...

ETA: An update with more information has been posted over on lj_releases. It's worth a look.

L'Shanah Tova!

ftmichael — Sun, 16 Sep 2012 23:56:47 GMT

Reposted from last year.

Rosh Hashanah, the Jewish New Year, begins tonight at sundown. For those unfamiliar with it, see http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Rosh_Hashanah .

From bearsir, reposted with permission.

a friend wrote to ask what an appropriate wish for Rosh Hashanah was, and whether it was the sort of holiday for which one might send a card. When I finished writing back I realized I'd produced three fairly decent compact paragraphs that others might also find useful, and so I am reprinting them here.

Yes, many Jews send Rosh Hashanah (usually pronounced RUSH-a-SHUN-a by North American Jews, in Israel pronounced ROSH ha-sha-NAH, with the O in ROSH like in the word 'go") cards, usually with fall motifs, images of apples and honey, or other seasonal pictures. Happy Rosh Hashanah is a perfectly appropriate greeting; it's also traditional to wish someone a sweet new year, and, if you're close with someone, you might give them a gift of fruits, candies, honey, jam, or any other sweet food to go with it. In Hebrew, you'd say to someone "L'shanah tova" (leh-shah-NAH toe-VAH) which means "have a good year".

Rosh Hashanah is sort of the companion holiday to Yom Kippur (YOM key-POUR, again the O in YOM is like the O in the word 'go'), which always occurs ten days later. Yom Kippur is a very serious holiday - the Day of Atonement, when Jews fast for 24 hours and repent before G-d for any transgressions of the previous year. One does not ever wish someone a Happy Yom Kippur; the appropriate thing to say is "have an easy fast." When Yom Kippur (which, like all Jewish holidays, goes from sundown to sundown) is over, people very often eat a big meal all together. After Yom Kippur is over, you may say "L'shana tova tikatevu" (leh-shah-NAH toe-VAH tick-ah-TEY-vu) which means, roughly, "may you be inscribed for a good year."

The ten days between the two are called the "days of awe." Our tradition is that on Rosh Hashanah the book of life is inscribed, and that on Yom Kippur it is sealed, with the fates and fortunes of all written inside. During the ten days of awe, it is incumbent upon all Jews to do whatever they can to right wrongs, apologize for misdeeds, and make amends wherever possible with people they've harmed either by action or inaction, omission or commission. On Yom Kippur, you cannot ask G-d's forgiveness for anything for which you have not attempted to ask forgiveness or make amends for among your fellow beings.

Custom Facebook timeline cover images!

ftmichael — Wed, 23 May 2012 00:30:29 GMT

My Facebook timeline has just been updated with a shiny new cover image and integrated profile pic. You should go and admire it. If you would like to also have a custom cover image without having to figure out how to do it yourself, you should contact the ever-talented ganimede, who is responsible for this impressive display.

See also his recent post about this very thing.

Good people of LJ!

ftmichael — Sun, 20 May 2012 13:40:31 GMT

The talented ganimede is considering offering to make custom cover images for people's Facebook timelines, and is trying to gauge interest. Please see his post for more information.

When Stuff Goes Sour: Social Networking and the End of the Universe

ftmichael — Sat, 24 Mar 2012 21:41:02 GMT

(I always liked coming up with titles for my papers in school.)

So I just had a conversation with ganimede. It went thusly:

Michael: What did you get up to today?
Nathaniel: stuff :P
Michael: Oh, that sounds terribly exciting :P
Nathaniel: It was thrilling
Nathaniel: just wait for the LJ post. "Today I did Stuff."
Nathaniel: Maybe I should make it a Facebook status. "Today I did Stuff. Like if you did Stuff too!!!"
Nathaniel: sorry forgot the obligatory LOL
Michael: *snrk*
Nathaniel: ten minutes later, 25 likes and 4 comments saying "omg i totally did stuff too lol"
Nathaniel: two comments that just say "lol"
Michael: By the next day, there will be dozens of comments that just say 'lol'
Nathaniel: and right at the bottom one that says "doing stuff suckz"
Michael: *was just thinking that*
Nathaniel: which then gets more likes than the original status
Michael: Exactly.
Nathaniel: at which point everyone over the age of 19 thinks "wtf? Facebook is rubbish" and goes to LJ to write a long rant about it.
Michael: And then you have succeeded in getting people to come back to LJ!
Nathaniel: and the LJ post gets 1 comment that says "I know."
Nathaniel: the other 95 readers of the post all nod sympathetically
Michael: Yus, and say not one word
Nathaniel: and look for the Like button
Michael: *snrk*
Nathaniel: it's funny cos it's true
Michael: It's v funny and v v true
Nathaniel: hey you could post it on LJ! how meta
Nathaniel: and then you could make a status on Facebook linking to your LJ post
Nathaniel: although, I think writing a post about Facebook and LJ, and the posting about them on LJ and Facebook is probably the way the world ends
Nathaniel: it's the social networking equivalent of dividing by zero *nods sagely*
...
Michael: 'Today, Nathaniel did Stuff. Then he told me about it and I giggled a lot cos he's a funny boy. Fin.'
Nathaniel: no! 'Today Nathaniel did Stuff. Then we discussed the wider implications of doing Stuff with regards to Social Networking and the End of the Universe. Fin.' :P

LiveJournal: Russia's unlikely internet giant

ftmichael — Thu, 01 Mar 2012 14:28:30 GMT

http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/magazine-17177053

LiveJournal: Russia's unlikely internet giant
By Robert Greenall BBC News

As Russia prepares to elect a new president this weekend, voters are more fired up than they have been for a decade. It's partly due to an internet revolution that has challenged the state's power to control public opinion - and to the blogging platform LiveJournal.

A month before the election, a liberal opposition group carried out a brazen stunt, hanging a massive anti-Putin banner across the river from the Kremlin. It showed the prime minister's face crossed out, and the words "Putin, leave".

The banner was hastily removed, but photos of the action reached millions of Russians via the blog of Ilya Yashin, the group's leader and one of a small army of opposition activists currently spreading their word through the Russian blogosphere.

In a country with tightly controlled TV and few independent newspapers and radio stations, the internet is a vital space for alternative opinion. Almost all of it appears on the blogging platform LiveJournal, known in Russian as Zhivoy Zhurnal, or simply ZheZhe.

Set up by US developer Brad Fitzpatrick in 1998, as a way to communicate online with his friends, LiveJournal - complete with its mascot "Frank the goat" - may seem at first sight a strange medium for Russia's new-found political vibrancy.

But Russians have made LiveJournal their own, turning what is in the West a relatively obscure and nowadays rather dated platform into a huge, seething mass of political anger, colourful prose and clever repartee.

It all started by accident.

Roman Leibov, a Slavic literature lecturer at Tartu University in Estonia and the first Russian to start writing on LiveJournal, said he came to it via a link on a forum in 2001.

"First attempt at writing. Let's try it in Russian… how funny!" was his first entry.

"I liked it because there had been a demand for something like this for a long time... and I got involved in it quite quickly and started actively showing it to my friends," he told the BBC.

Russian blogosphere researcher Eugene Gorny, another early adopter who joined two months after Mr Leibov, said they were really just playing around.

"At the time we didn't think of ourselves as pioneers, we were just enjoying ourselves," he said.

Even at this early stage, there was a difference between the Russian and American parts of LiveJournal, with Americans using it mainly for diaries rather than for interaction.

The Russians, meanwhile, were creating a community. For them it felt more like a social network.

Russian LiveJournal

5,791,138 users and 171,915 communities using the Cyrillic alphabet

Average user is 25-year-old male graduate living in Moscow

Most popular interest is "music", followed by "photo", "movie", "book", "travel", "psychology", "internet", "sea", "love", "sex" and "cats"

Most popular blogs as of May 2011 were tema (more than 1.9 million comments) and drugoi (more than 1.6 million)

200 millionth post registered in November 2010

Source: SUP media

"They started showing it to their friends and then the nucleus appeared of an initial online community," says Mr Leibov. "It was genuinely the first in that medium of diaries and social networks simultaneously."

Newcomers often started as readers of other blogs but soon began writing their own, he adds.

ZheZhe soon became a plaything of an elite group of Russian internet professionals. Many of them were journalists who publicised the platform further and took it to a still wider readership - it seemed to be fulfilling a basic need in Russian society.

"If there hadn't been ZheZhe, there would have been something else," says Oleg Kashin, a reporter at the newspaper Kommersant, who has also blogged with LiveJournal for 10 years.

It became what Mr Gorny describes as "the most fashionable address on the web", and even a generic term for blog in Russian. By the mid-noughties, 44% of Russian bloggers used it.

Analysts say there are a number of reasons why LiveJournal became so popular and permanent among Russians.

Its servers were in the US - at a time when the Russian government was tightening the screw on private media, this was seen as a guarantee of freedom of speech

It was devised as a multi-language environment, and by 2004 its interface was thought to have been translated into more than 30 languages

It fits well into the Russian mentality, which values friendships and informal networks

Being established long before any possible competition gave it a natural advantage

Transferring blogs to a new platform is relatively easy, but LiveJournal has social network elements which are very platform-specific so leaving it can be problematic

In 2006, though, many Russian users' faith in LiveJournal was shaken.

The Russian-language pages were licensed to the Russian company SUP media, founded by US entrepreneur Andrew Paulson and a Russian banker thought to be close to the Kremlin, Alexander Mamut. Just over a year later, SUP bought LiveJournal.

"LiveJournal members embody the spirit of passionate individual expression - we are continually grateful to be a part of your daily life”
2012 "State of the Goat" address to LiveJournal members

It was the largest-ever Russian takeover of a US internet company, with media reports saying SUP paid about $30m (£18.8m) for the privilege.

Bloggers responded with outrage, suggesting the Russian government was trying to crack down on LiveJournal ahead of the March 2008 presidential elections.

A blogger with the handle "halph" wrote that the Kremlin had "something to fear" from LiveJournal, "the only platform for free speech in Russia".

"There was a wave of fear," says John Kelly, one of the authors of Harvard University's 2010 Berkman Report on the Russian blogosphere.

"There was a lot of speculation at the time that everyone was going to defect and go to other platforms - it didn't happen."

Also, LiveJournal's new owners had seen a business opportunity, in a rapidly growing Russian internet market. Apparently they had no intention of curbing bloggers' passions.

And even if they wanted to, they could not, maintains Anton Nossik, currently media director at SUP and himself a long-time LiveJournal blogger. The platform is hosted by a separate California-based company called LiveJournal Inc, set up after the deal.

"If a blog has a Russian hosting, police can check up on the blogger," Nossik says. But if someone has a blog on LiveJournal, the Russian authorities have no way of getting to them other than approaching their counterparts in Sacramento. "The typical answer from the state of California is: 'No can do'."

By March 2009, ZheZhe had a monthly audience of 8.7 million, according to global market research specialists TNS.

But with the decade coming to a close, LiveJournal was no longer the only game in town. It faced rivalry from blogging platforms like LiveInternet, and perhaps more importantly from social networking sites - both Facebook itself and vKontakte, a Russian site closely modelled on Facebook.

Crackdown coming?

With Russia's internet space (Runet) virtually free of censorship or government control, there has been talk for years about some attempt being made to curb it. Now elections have galvanised opponents of the regime via the web, analysts say the authorities have severely underestimated the power of social media in a country where TV has long been king.

Some see a crackdown after the election as virtually inevitable. But few believe such curbs could have more than partial success - they say there's no question of the genie going back in the bottle. Russia is not China, which created an internet framework it could easily control. Runet evolved in the liberal political climate of the late 1990s, and does not easily lend itself to interference from above.

It could be that jailing bloggers is the only way to stop them speaking out. But even in countries like Iran where this has been tried, the blogosphere remains an active space with all kinds of dissent.

Independent web expert and consultant Anton Merkurov does not see this as direct competition, though.

"[LiveJournal] is not a social network in the same way that Facebook etc are... LiveInternet may be popular like LiveJournal but it's for a very young audience," he says.

He adds that there are about 10 stand-alone blogs with media influence - and the vast majority are on ZheZhe. Research by John Kelly's social network analysis company Morningside Analytics has found that 93% of election-related blogs active over the last six months are on LiveJournal.

Nevertheless, in the first eight months of 2011, according to market researchers Comscore, the number of unique users on LiveJournal worldwide fell by 8.2 million to 27.7 million compared with the previous year - though in Russia, the decline was not so steep.

Bloggers from across the political spectrum have come to LiveJournal as a way to put their messages across. In April 2011, President Dmitry Medvedev started his own blog, viewable both on the Kremlin website and on LiveJournal.

"If you're not in ZheZhe, it's not guaranteed that anyone's going to read what you write... It's a place where it's easy to get together with people," says Mr Gorny.

But for the Russian establishment, the informal, wild and uncontrollable world of ZheZhe can be a double-edged sword, with state officials vulnerable to ambush.

Duma speaker Boris Gryzlov made his debut in the blogosphere in October 2009.

"Greetings, respected bloggers and all readers of my journal," began his rather pompous message.

Immediately, he was compared by users to elderly apparatchiks delivering speeches at Communist Party congresses in the old days.

Countries that have blocked LiveJournal

China - for 2009 Tiananmen anniversary

Turkmenistan - since 2009

Kazakhstan - 2008-10 for hosting blog by Rakhat Aliyev, disgraced son-in-law of President Nazarbayev

Kazakhstan - 2011, for "propagating terrorism and religious extremism", including during recent unrest in the oil workers' town of Zhanaozen

"Err, Borya, this is the internet. We can tell you to get lost here," wrote a user by the name of "radulova".

Although opposition bloggers can also come under attack here too, they tend to feel more comfortable about expressing themselves.

Alexey Navalny - one of the figureheads of the current protest movement - rose to fame as a campaigner against corruption, launching online campaigns that resulted in hundreds of complaints being sent to watchdogs and investigators.

"For me, there are no opportunities to publish materials about corruption in, say, [state gas company] Gazprom or [oil company] Transneft," he told the New York Times last year.

"Through LiveJournal, I can bring this information to a few million people, which is comparable to a television audience."

Oleg Kashin has also become famous for his muscular attacks on the powers-that-be, so when he was beaten almost to death with metal bars outside his front door in 2010 there was an immediate wave of online outrage. News of the incident spread across the Russian internet within hours, and a demonstration was rapidly organised in central Moscow. Many of the participants were internet users with no history of street protest.

"I was surprised by the scale of the reaction," he says.

So it was natural for ZheZhe to become a focal point of activity when last December political passions became inflamed during and after parliamentary elections, which the opposition claims were rigged.

An opposition rally on 5 December was ignored by the mainstream media but actively discussed in the blogosphere. And when bloggers Mr Navalny and Ilya Yashin were arrested on 5 December, a live stream outside the police station in the middle of the night attracted 3,700 users.

Unlike some other countries, Russia has never made any attempt to block LiveJournal - perhaps because it would alienate too many internet users.

"We know based on technical testing... that Russia does not technically filter the internet, so I would not expect a Chinese or Kazakh style approach to Internet control," says Bruce Etling, director of the Internet and Democracy Project at the Berkman Center.

"It seems unlikely that they will start to do so in the near future, since the political costs of doing so are significant."

Famous Russian LiveJournal bloggers

President Medvedev

Chechen President Ramzan Kadyrov

Mikhail Prokhorov, billionaire and presidential candidate

Tatyana Yumasheva, daughter of former President Yeltsin

Moscow sculptor Zurab Tsereteli

Boris Akunin, author of novels featuring the detective Erast Fandorin, and now opposition activist

Mr Merkurov agrees. "It's not in anyone's interests, either business or political, to put any pressure on the internet," he says.

"It has always been an island of freedom and it will remain so."

But a number of DDoS (distributed denial of service) attacks on LiveJournal, and on some independent media, at sensitive moments suggest someone would like to close it if they could.

Attacks in March-April 2011 led Mr Medvedev to personally order the police to investigate, describing them as "outrageous and illegal". LiveJournal went down again just before the December elections.

SUP development director Ilya Dronov wrote in his blog of the April attack: "The attack was directed at the service itself. Someone very much wants LiveJournal to cease to exist as a platform.

"The question now is whether we will succumb or not. This is war, and, alas, will not be without casualties."

So can LiveJournal survive, or will further attacks send its users elsewhere? It lost its monopoly on Russian blogs long ago, and younger internet users are choosing Facebook or vKontakte in droves.

"It's a problem, of course, because people need to publish immediately, and if a service doesn't work right now the user switches to another window or browser, to Facebook, Twitter or whatever," says Merkurov.

According to a 2010 Berkman Center report on DDoS attacks, the bigger hosting sites are much better defended against this kind of attack.

However, Anton Nossik believes LiveJournal will weather the attacks, saying it has the "best DDoS protection in the world", with "hundreds of thousands of dollars put into decoys".

"They failed miserably to shut down LiveJournal on election day, the day before and the day after," he says.

It appears there is life in the old goat yet. A few weeks ago, LiveJournal unveiled a new initiative called LJ Media, a social publishing group set up to turn selected LiveJournal communities into media sites - like online newspapers - and thereby try to bring its extensive content to a wider public.

And it still has an appeal - especially among older bloggers - which doesn't seem to be fading. At least not yet. A breakdown of users internationally shows a site still popular with people in their 20s.

"It survives simply because people are conservative, because that community which was created at the beginning of the century from quite interesting people is still there, they're still writing," says Roman Leibov.

"They may complain about technical imperfections, changes in the rules of the game. They may start on Twitter, then they transfer their tweets to LiveJournal."

He explains that, as a writer and lover of literature, it is important for him to have a platform where his and other people's work can be preserved.

"I'm bewildered by Facebook… how can a service exist where people say certain words, and those words disappear?" he wonders.

"No-one on vKontakte or Facebook has written 10 pages of text. On ZheZhe it's easy to publish," adds Eugene Gorny.

"Those things are not for writers. ZheZhe is very convenient for people who have something to say."

L'Shanah Tova!

ftmichael — Wed, 28 Sep 2011 17:37:14 GMT

Vote in my poll!

ftmichael — Fri, 09 Sep 2011 13:02:09 GMT

Like a numpty I posted a poll over the Labour Day weekend so I'm wondering if a load of people missed it, because it hasn't had many responses at all. But everyone likes a ticky box so please go tell me what you call your evening meal!

Call me what you like, just don't call me late for ...

ftmichael — Sun, 04 Sep 2011 21:29:06 GMT

Nathaniel just posted asking what everyone calls their evening meal. I generally call it dinner, but when I commented, I realised that I don't really know what people in other parts of the US do, other than that people in the South seem to call it supper more often and people in the North seem to call it dinner more often. I was reminded of The Pop vs. Soda Page and when Nathaniel suggested I post a poll, I thought it was an excellent idea. So here it is!

I've divided the US into nine regions, the same way the US census does it, because that seemed like the easiest way to do it. I'd love people to comment with what state they're specifically in but I wasn't about to post a poll with 50 options! But I know things can vary quite a bit within a particular region, especially when you consider that Alaska and Hawai'i are grouped in with California, Oregon, and Washington but are very different places. I've also included a spot for folks outside the US and if that's you, I'd love for you to comment and let me know what country/area you're in.

I'm also aware that people often relocate and bring their language with them, so if you're not in a given area currently but you're from there and that's where you got the word you use, that's fine with me. Again, details in the form of comments are much appreciated! This is all very interesting to me.

I'd love to hear what time you eat your evening meal as well! This was going to turn into a very long and involved poll so I kept it to one question and I hope people will comment with all this extra information I'm tacking on. I'm curious in particular if there's a solid North/South divide with people in the South eating significantly later than people in the North, because it gets dark later down there.

The nine United States Census Divisions are:

* New England - CT, MA, ME, NH, RI, VT
* Mid-Atlantic - NJ, NY, PA
* East North Central - IL, IN, MI, OH, WI
* West North Central - IA, KS, MO, MN, ND, NE, SD
* South Atlantic - DC, DE, FL, GA, MD, NC, SC, VA, WV
* East South Central - AL, KY, MS, TN
* West South Central - AR, LA, OK, TX
* Mountain - AZ, CO, ID, MT, NM, NV, UT, WY
* Pacific - AK, CA, HI, OR, WA

Click here if you need to consult a map to check which division you're in.

View Poll: You know, food you eat when it gets dark?

PSA: Testosterone enanthate shortage in the US

ftmichael — Mon, 30 May 2011 18:47:15 GMT

I was just at CVS to refill my T prescription and was told that testosterone enanthate is on backorder and won't be available until 19 July. This is enanthate specifically; cypionate is still available. The pharmacist told me that there's only one company in the US that makes enanthate and they're out of stock for some reason so there's a shortage. If you're on enanthate and you're going to need a refill before late July, I recommend trying to refill it ASAP if you can. Some pharmacies still have vials in stock but I have no idea how long they'll stay available. I had my prescription sent to a different CVS as my local one had already run out of enanthate. Hopefully I'll get it tomorrow as my current vial is nearly empty and tomorrow's shot day!

You can always get your doctor to prescribe you cypionate instead, but if you can get a refill on your current prescription, so much the better.

Dreamwidth invite code up for grabs

ftmichael — Wed, 06 Apr 2011 01:02:52 GMT

Dreamwidth has given me a new invite code for someone to use to set up a new account. Anyone want it?

US Job Site Bans Bias Over Gender Identity

ftmichael — Wed, 06 Jan 2010 18:05:34 GMT

http://nytimes.com/2010/01/06/us/06gender.html

US Job Site Bans Bias Over Gender Identity

By Brian Knowlton
Published: January 5, 2010

WASHINGTON — The Obama administration has inserted language into the federal jobs Web site explicitly banning employment discrimination based on gender identity.

The protection is expected to apply to the small Transgender population — people who identify their gender differently from the information on their birth certificates — and it merely formalises what had been increasingly unchallenged government practice over several years.

But civil liberties and gender rights groups welcomed it on Tuesday as the clearest statement yet by the Obama administration that such discrimination in the federal workplace would not be accepted.

Mara Keisling, executive director of the National Centre for Transgender Equality, said, “The largest employer in the country is doing what all the other large employers in the country are doing, so that’s really great news.”

But the new standard brought instant criticism from cultural conservatives.

“We at the Family Research Council oppose including gender identity as a category of protection,” said Peter S. Sprigg, senior fellow for policy studies.

Mr Sprigg said his group believed that what it calls “gender identity disorder” should be “treated with therapy to help people be comfortable with their biological sex rather than affirming and celebrating and protecting those who want to deny their biological sex.”

When the administration foreshadowed the change back in June, it was thought the guidelines would be in an updated federal handbook for managers and supervisors. Their inclusion instead in the equal-employment opportunity notices on http://usajobs.gov/ , the federal jobs site, was viewed as even more significant.

“This is frankly a bigger deal,” said Christopher E. Anders, senior legislative counsel for the Washington office of the American Civil Liberties Union.

Pics of Nathaniel's Boston trip!

ftmichael — Wed, 23 Dec 2009 23:46:53 GMT

I was too busy having fun with Nathaniel and I kept forgetting my camera, so I don't have a ton of pictures from this visit, sadly. On the plus side, Nathaniel never forgot his camera, so he has loads! Head on over to his journal to see. (His post has 99 pictures, I think, so beware if you have a slow connection!)

New England Trans Pride, 03 October:

It's Zander!

Grand Marshal Gunner Scott giving his speech.

Walden Pond, 05 October:

There wasn't much foliage yet, but it was still pretty. (Click to see it full-sized.)

Trees with minimal autumn foliage.

Light shining through some leaves.

Light on the water, as seen through the leaves.

This shot is of Walden Pond, not Bermuda or something.

Next to where Thoreau's house originally stood is a large pile of stones. Thoreau's old friend, the Concord sage Bronson Alcott (father of Louisa May Alcott), had walked out from Concord in 1872 with a visitor and placed a stone at what he remembered to be the site of Thoreau's house (Thoreau lived there in 1845 and the house didn't last terribly long). Since then, it's been tradition for people to add a stone, and there's a huge pile of them now. Some folks have got creative, writing on the stones or stacking them in gravity-defying towers, like this one.

Two more cool stacks of rocks.

I saw some yellow foliage over this fork in the path, and wanted to take a picture that I could entitle 'Two Roads Diverged in a Yellow Wood', but there wasn't really enough foliage yet to make it work. You can see some yellow leaves at the top of the picture, though.

We also visited the replica of Thoreau's house, a little way away from the original site, and Nathaniel wrote an entry in the ledger that was inside. It really is bigger on the inside!

Nathaniel looking cute in the doorway of Thoreau's house.

Everyone has done this with the statue of Thoreau that's just outside the house. Here he's reading a guide book about some local walking tours you can take.

And here he's examining Nathaniel's mobile phone.

Burlington, VT, 25 October:

A seagull in flight over Lake Champlain.

Close-up of sunlight on the water.

The clouds were beautiful.

Another lovely shot of the clouds.

Sunlight on the water.

A passing sailboat, with a lighthouse in the distance. We were so lucky that these guys decided to go for a sail while we were taking pictures!

More clouds, with sunlight on the water.

Not a ton of foliage yet, even less than an hour from the Canadian border. That white house is Burlington's City Hall.

These bushes had turned a lovely colour, though.

Church Street, as seen from one end.

Hallowe'en, 31 October:

We had a lot of fun with my glow-in-the-dark chalk. Nathaniel wrote this on the front steps.

A bunch of small branches had recently come down from all the wind, and Nathaniel had the fantastic idea of chalking them so they'd be visible in the dark, and standing them up like a creepy forest along the front walk.

I drew eyes on the shutters, as is my custom every year. Nathaniel helped. (He drew the ones on the left here; I drew the ones on the right.)

Nathaniel also very kindly let me trace him on the driveway!

Nathaniel chalking another branch.

I drew a face on a tree by the sidewalk.

Nathaniel placing a branch by the front door.

After dark, we went out to see people's decorations. There's one house down the street from me that goes way overboard for a number of holidays. Here's their Hallowe'en contribution to the neighbourhood.

A close-up of maybe a quarter of their front yard, taken with a flash.

I love crashed witches, so of course I had to take a picture. It had just started to rain a little - I love that it looks like snow in this picture.

Another neighbour's jack-o-lanterns. I really liked the bottom one, which is of a headless horseman.

Nathaniel's jack-o-lantern, with the Tenth Doctor and the TARDIS.

My jack-o-lantern, with three wolves on a hill in front of a full moon.

Promo shot of the Tenth and Ninth Doctors.

Another promo shot of the Ninth and Tenth Doctors.

At the airport, 04 November:

Giving me a smile before he had to go through security.

13 Things You Should Keep in Your Car

ftmichael — Sat, 19 Dec 2009 02:03:48 GMT

Thanks to ganimede for this! This is definitely not men-only territory.

I have six out of the 13 listed items in my car. (For the curious: I counted the cell phone because I always keep mine in my pocket and I make an effort to have it well-charged before I go anywhere, although I currently don't have a car charger for it; on top of that, I have jumper cables, a flashlight/torch [I think], a warm blanket [plus my bright orange sleeping bag, both for warmth and attention-getting], two ice scrapers [one with attached snow brush], and two first aid kits [thanks ganimede for the new one!].) I had seven, but after several years without being needed, the gallon jugs of water I kept in the trunk/boot just evaporated from baking in a hot car over time. Plus obviously it's heavy, which affects gas mileage. Everything except the phone, one small flashlight/torch (I think), the smaller first aid kit, and the ice scrapers live in the trunk/boot. There should be a small flashlight/torch in the glove compartment, which is where the smaller first aid kit lives, and the ice scrapers live under the seats. My phone lives in my pocket, of course.

I also have two bungee cords, which weren't listed for some reason. The MREs are a great idea and easy enough to implement, so I'll have to get some of those! (I might get Power Bars or something rather than actual MREs, though.)

More suggestions are in the comments, of course, found at the end of the original post. One suggestion I found ridiculously helpful was a roll of duct tape, plus a copy of a book you love if you need to amuse yourself while waiting for help.

http://artofmanliness.com/2009/12/17/13-things-a-man-should-keep-in-his-car/

When I was growing up, I noticed that my dad kept the trunk of his car well-stocked with supplies. A lot of the equipment in his car was for his job busting poachers as a game warden, but most of the things he packed in his trunk were for emergency situations.

And there were plenty of times when my dad was able to put his trunk equipment to work.

For example, about 20 years ago my dad was driving home to Oklahoma from New Mexico in his old burgundy Caprice. Just outside of Groom, TX, near the famous leaning water tower along I-40, a hellacious snow storm hit. It was a complete white out, so my dad had to pull over until things settled down.

But things didn’t settle down until a day later.

My dad had to spend the night in his car in the middle of nowhere while a blizzard roared outside. But because he had the forethought to prepare for situations like this, he was able to keep warm with some blankets and avoid ravaging hunger with some MREs.

Many of you will be hitting the road this holiday season to visit family, so I consulted my dad, Tom McKay, and asked him what supplies he thinks every man should keep in his car. Here’s his suggested list.

1. Fully charged cell phone. Cell phones have significantly cut down on your chances of being stranded on the side of the road, but don’t count on it as your only line of defence. I’ve been in plenty of rural areas where my cell phone was only worthwhile for playing pong. In addition to your main phone, have a backup one that you can use to call 911. Any old cell phone will do, even if it’s not activated. Cellular carriers are required by law to complete 911 calls from any cell phone. Just throw that old Nokia cell phone from 1999 into your glove compartment and keep it there.

2. Jumper cables. You walk out to your car after a long day of work, stick the key into the ignition, give it a turn, and…. click, click. Crap! You’re going to be late to your kid’s football game! You then look up and notice you left the dome light on all day. It happens to the best of us. Car batteries die, so be ready with a set of jumper cables. And even if you never suffer a dead battery, it’s always good to have a set of jumper cables so you can help a damsel (or dude) in distress who needs their car jumped.

3. Flashlight [torch]. Good for providing light at night-time when 1) putting on a spare tire, 2) jump starting another car, or 3) exchanging insurance information with the clueless driver that rear ended you at a stop light. Get a Maglite and you can also thump would-be car jackers in the head with it.

4. Roadside flares/reflective triangle. When pulled over on the side of the road, you’re basically a sitting duck, hoping that other drivers don’t turn the situation into a clip for one of those extreme video shows. It’s especially dangerous to be hanging out on the side of the road at night. Ensure that you and those around you are visible when you pull over to the side of the road by using road flares or at least a reflective triangle. The old school flaming flares seem to be harder to find these days as people switch to LED “flares.”

5. MREs. You never know when you’ll be stranded for long periods of times in your car. If you’ve ever driven out West, you’ll know that it can be hundreds of miles until the closest source of help. Unless you’ve built up a tolerance for extended periods of fasting, keep some MREs or granola/power bars in the back of your car to munch on while you wait for the tow truck to come.

6. Warm blankets. Tom can tell you first-hand why warm blankets are a must. It got pretty dang cold in his Caprice that night. But blankets have uses that go beyond emergency situations. It’s always good to have a blanket in the car for snuggling with your gal while you cheer for your team on a cold fall night or for laying it on the ground for a picnic.

7. Ice scraper. Don’t be the chump that’s out there scrapping their windshield with a credit card at 5AM in the morning. A good ice scraper will set you back just a few bucks, and it will make clearing your windshield much easier and much faster.

8. First aid kit. Whether you’re cleaning up a head wound filled with glass shards or fixing a boo-boo on your two year old, it’s good to have a first aid kit. You can always buy one, but putting together your own in an Altoids tin is more fun.

9. Water bottles. For when you’re stranded in Death Valley in the middle of the hottest heat wave on record … or for any other time your car decides to break down on you. Or, for after you’ve left a concert and you’re so dang parched!

10. Tow strap. I don’t know how many times my dad saved my butt with this thing back in high school. Towards the end of my blue ‘92 Chevy Cavalier’s (aka, “The Smurf”) life, it would just stop running and no amount of cable jumping would help get it started. For moments like these, my dad busted out the tow strap. You just attach one end of the tow strap to the front of the car that you want to pull and the other to the hitch on the back of your car. The stranded driver stays in the dead car, puts it in neutral, and steers and brakes while it gets towed to its destination.

11. Folding shovel. There are a couple of instances where a folding shovel might come in handy. The first is when you get stuck in the snow or ice. You can use the shovel to dig some snow out and place some dirt under the tire to get more traction. The second situation is when a car tire gets stuck in a hole or something. You can use the shovel to dig about and create some ramps to help get your car unstuck. Also, it can be used as an improvised weapon, Green Beret-style.

12. LifeHammer. When you’re trying to escape from a sinking car, this little piece of plastic and metal can be the difference between life and death. Use it to break your window, cut your seatbelt and make your escape.

13. Portable air compressor. My dad feels like this was the best purchase he made for the car. When your tire is leaking but hasn’t totally blown out, instead of putting on a spare, you can use a portable air compressor to get back on the road. The compressor fills your tire up enough to allow you to drive to a repair shop to get it fixed. It plugs right into your cigarette lighter. Bonus use: no more paying 75 cents to fill up your tires at stingy gas stations.

There are kits you can buy that have a lot of this stuff in them, but I personally think it’s satisfying to assemble your own cache of supplies. And you can put together a better choice of things.

Happy Chanuka!

ftmichael — Fri, 18 Dec 2009 21:59:36 GMT

Tonight is the final night of Chanuka. All Jewish holidays begin and end at sundown, so tomorrow is the final day of Chanuka, and at sundown tomorrow the holiday will be over.

I only managed to get two boxes of candles this year, so only two menorahs are lit tonight, as opposed to all three like last year.

alt="Menorahs" />

Transition update!

ftmichael — Sun, 13 Dec 2009 01:17:44 GMT

Yesterday I changed my sex with Social Security! I changed my name with Social Security nearly ten years ago, and it's been nearly six years since I had top surgery, but I never bothered changing my sex with Social Security because the office was a schlep to get to, and it hadn't interfered with anything employment-wise; I wasn't bothered about being listed as female on work records, and as long as the work records match Social Security's info, you can get paid. Recently, though, I found out that there was another Social Security office very near my house, so I figured I might as well get this done. I dug out my surgeon's letter from Dr Brownstein - last used to get my passport a couple of years ago, and very nicely returned to me by the passport people - and went along to the office.

The office was nearly empty, as most people are at work in the middle of the day. I took a number and waited, and finally the only other person there finished his business and left. The nice lady called my number and I went up to the window and said I needed to change my sex on my records.

This poor nice lady did not know what to do with me. She looked completely weirded out from the moment I said what I needed right up until I left. She was, however, entirely professional in how she treated me, and I really have no complaints. When I told her what I needed, she looked at me for a minute and then asked, 'Did you have a sex-change operation?' I was proud of myself for not launching straight into Trans 101, which I nearly did just by reflex; I managed to catch myself and just told her yes. She responded, 'Oh! I didn't know if you meant we got it wrong.' Well, in a matter of speaking, they did, but I wasn't going to go there. Her head was seconds from exploding as it was.

I gave her my driver's license and my surgeon's letter, which she took a little time looking over, still looking completely weirded out. Something had clearly short-circuited in her brain, making it hard for her to read and process what is a pretty simple letter. She took so long with it that I piped up with 'My understanding is that the surgeon's letter is all that's required to change the records', to which she replied 'Oh yes ... I mean, I assume so, I just need to read it' or something to that effect. She did also say, 'It's a pretty unusual request!' and I smiled and agreed that it must be. Finally she worked out that Dr Brownstein was my surgeon, and that the name at the bottom was just the person who had notarised it.

She then asked me a bunch of questions to fill in the form on her computer screen - my Social Security number (of course), birth name, current name, parents' birth names, whether I'd been born in the US, race (complete with long shpiel about my not being obligated to disclose my race and why they ask - wouldn't it be nice if they did that for sex too?), and maybe another question or two that I can't remember now. Totally not a problem. She filled everything in, printed it out, and asked me to check that the information there was all correct, which it was. Then something else printed out, which she went to retrieve, and she said that apparently it had decided to send me a new Social Security card even though I'd said I didn't need one and she thought she'd told it not to send one. She said there were restrictions on how many you could get in a year and how many you could get in a lifetime, and I said I only had the one currently, so she said that was completely fine. She was still looking weirded out at this point, but she said I was all set, so I smiled and thanked her and left.

I think I gave her a great story to tell her family if she goes visiting for Christmas or anything. I wonder if she gossiped to anyone else who was back there as soon as I left. 'You will not believe the request I just got ...' I was highly amused by the whole thing.

It's a relief to have that done, even though it wasn't urgent or anything. Transition at this point, in terms of nuts and bolts, is really just about tying up loose ends. I still have a hysto on my to-do list, but that's more or less it for big stuff!

Reason #2,387,462,378 why my boyfriend is amazing

ftmichael — Sat, 12 Dec 2009 02:02:53 GMT

Nathaniel and I had talked a considerable amount about what he was getting me for Chanuka, because it was a shirt and he wanted to be sure it was just what I wanted and that it would fit me, and because I hate surprises. I ordered a Chanuka present for him online a little while back, to try and make sure it would get there by today, and tried to decide whether I'd open his present as soon as it arrived or wait until the final night of Chanuka, as is customary when you receive only one gift from someone.

Today Nathaniel IM'd me to say good night, and asked if the package he'd sent had arrived yet. I said it hadn't, and he asked if I was sure, since it would be sitting on the front porch and wouldn't have come in through the mail slot. I had checked when the post arrived today and it wasn't there, but I went down to check again - and there it was! I swear he's psychic. It was quite a heavy box, which had me curious as I was only expecting a shirt. I brought it up and Nathaniel stayed online while I opened it.

This incredibly sweet, thoughtful, wonderful boy got me eight presents, one for each night, and didn't tell me. His logic was that he knows I hate surprises, so he just didn't tell me I was getting a surprise. Annoyingly, I found this hard to argue with.

I really am the luckiest boy alive - not because I get stuff, but because I have this amazing thoughtful boyfriend who's always thinking of me and doing sweet things for me. I don't know what I did to deserve someone this wonderful, but it must have been something pretty epic.

... oh yeah, also, happy Chanuka to all those celebrating.

Call for Submissions (FTMs)

ftmichael — Tue, 01 Dec 2009 21:46:21 GMT

Call for Submissions
LITTLE BOY LOST: True Adventures of Men without Boyhoods

Editor C. Michael Woodward is seeking submissions to Little Boy Lost (working title), an upcoming anthology by transsexual men on the longer-term psychosocial impact of transitioning from female to male.

A note from the Editor

To my FTM brothers:

On the 10th anniversary of becoming Michael, I paused to reflect on my journey thus far. There have been many moments along the way when I’ve noticed pieces of information missing from my psychological databank — sometimes subtle, sometimes profound — about societal expectations of men. Eventually, I realised this data is missing because, perceived as female, I was excluded from the first several decades of programming.

Regardless of one’s identity, expression, orientation, faith, or biology, the world is a very different place for men and for women—the subtleties of which you can’t fully grasp unless you have experienced life in both (or in between) genders. By coming into manhood after several decades “on the wrong hormone”, I have been amazed, dismayed, delighted, angered, frustrated, and generally amused by how profoundly different (and yet not) life is on the other side of the proverbial fence.

I know I am not alone. Tell me your story.

Little Boy Lost: True Adventures of Men without Boyhoods is a collection of short (non-fiction) stories, essays, and poetry addressing these questions or similar considerations:

· What is your most profound/terrifying/entertaining/embarrassing/enlightening story from your journey to manhood?

· How does a Trans man navigate male culture after being raised and socialised as female?

· To whom did/do you turn for advice, coaching, or mentoring?

· Have faith traditions impacted your decisions about transitioning? How has your transition impacted your relationship with your faith community?

· How has your professional/work life been impacted by the absence of male socialisation?

· Parents, are you treated differently as “dad” than you were as “mom”?

· How do you navigate dating, sex, and intimate relationships in mainstream (straight or gay) culture?

· What epiphanies or lessons have you learned about life, about the world, or about yourself? How has your perception of the world changed regarding men, women, masculinity, femininity, sex, sexuality, gender, politics, faith, class, race, ability, etc. …?

· How are FTMs different from cisgender (non-transsexual) men? How are we the same?

· What do you want the world to know about transsexual and/or cisgender men? What do you want newly transitioning men to know?

· For those living stealth (keeping your FTM history hidden), how does that affect your everyday life, your psyche, and your relationships with other people?

SUBMISSION GUIDELINES

Submissions should be in English and approximately 1,000 to 5,000 words in length. (Poetry may be shorter.) Submissions must be your original, non-fiction work, although creativity is encouraged. If your entry has been published previously, please state any previous publishing sources and dates. Multiple submissions allowed, but please send each submission as a separate email.

Authors are preferred to be female-to-male transsexuals who have been living full-time as men (as self-defined) in all aspects of their lives for at least five years. Submissions specifically encouraged from men who transitioned later in life (i.e. age 30 or older). I’m especially looking for new, unpublished writers; non-US writers; people of colour; people with disabilities; and those of various faiths and spiritual practices—and how those experiences influence your perspective of manhood. I may consider a limited number of submissions from partners, friends, or family members if the work expressly addresses the focus of the book.

NOTE: the purpose of this anthology is not to debate the gender binary or gender theory, nor to debate the appropriateness of certain terminology such as “transman” or “FTM” (however, discussion regarding “fitting in” is welcome in submissions). Editor fully acknowledges and embraces all identities, perspectives, and expressions of gender. This book/collection is specifically focused on individuals who were born female-bodied and have a substantial history living as women (regardless of core identity), have gone through the process of a physical and/or legal gender transition that began prior to 2005, and now live full-time as men and are generally acknowledged/accepted as male in daily mainstream life (aka “passing”).

Please submit your writings to littleboylost@lgbtqa.com no later than February 1, 2010, 11:59pm PST.

No attachments — paste your submission directly into the body of the email.

Submissions accepted by email only. Plain text email preferred.

Please include all of the following, in this order, in your email:

1. title of your submission

2. pseudonym or name as you would like it to appear (byline)

3. word count

4. body of submission

5. legal name

6. street address

7. area code and phone number

8. email address

9. the year and your age when transition began

10. a short bio (200 words or less)

11. publication history of this submission, if any

Contributors may use a pseudonym (pen name) for publishing purposes, but must provide legal name and accurate contact information to the editor. Any information submitted (except, obviously, that which is contained in your story/essay/poem and/or your bio), will be remain confidential.

Editor reserves the right to edit submissions for content or length. Selected submissions will be published, collectively or serially, by the editor and a yet-to-be-named publisher. Not all submissions will be published. Submissions will not be returned. Authors selected for publishing will receive a free copy of the book/publication.

About the Editor

C. Michael Woodward is a writer, musician, speaker, consultant, political advisor, peer counsellor, and social justice advocate — in no particular order. He led the Southern Arizona Gender Alliance (SAGA) for more than five years and worked in variety of roles at Wingspan, southern Arizona’s lesbian, gay, bisexual, and Transgender community centre.

Woodward currently serves as Co-Chair of the City of Tucson Commission on GLBT Issues and Chair of The University of Arizona President's LGBTQ Advisory Council. He is a former Board member of Female to Male International (FTMI) and is profiled on Lynn Conway's Successful Transmen, a prestigious website recognising leaders in the international Transgender community. Michael was a keynote speaker at the 2008 Southern Comfort Conference.

Since 2003, Michael has presented training and information about LGBTQ and allied concerns to thousands of people across the country. In 2009, he formed lgbtQ&A Diversity & Inclusion Consulting, providing sexual orientation and gender identity cultural competency, best practices, and transition planning services to organisations and individuals nationwide. For booking information, contact michael@lgbtqa.com.

In addition to more than a dozen how-to books on computer software, Woodward has published magazine articles, blogs, op-eds, and other writings on a variety of non-fiction topics. His latest book, Little Boy Lost: True Adventures of Men without Boyhoods, is currently in progress.

Nathaniel's latest visit!

ftmichael — Mon, 09 Nov 2009 23:20:36 GMT

It’s been a few days since Nathaniel left and I’m slowly adjusting to not having him here. He posted updates while he was here (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8), but I had neither the time nor the inclination to do that! I prefer to just do a big info-dump at the end, but I’d have a much harder time remembering everything if he didn’t keep such good notes during the visit, so I’m grateful that he does that.

So! Our five-week visit, broken down for your convenience.

When Nathaniel first got here, we had a few quiet days just hanging out and enjoying each others’ company. He arrived on a Monday, and on Tuesday we went grocery shopping, but otherwise we just hung out until Saturday! It was just as well, as we spent most of our visit doing a load of stuff and didn’t have too much down time.

On Saturday, we went out to New England Trans United Pride in Northampton. This was my first time there, just because Northampton is a bit of a schlep from Boston, but it was very cool. We left at 9 to make sure we’d get there by 11, and made it at 10.45. There were very few people there! By 11.30, though, there was a decent-sized crowd, and we even saw a few people we recognised, which was really nice. We got to carry signs for MTPC, but as soon as we started marching at 12, it started to rain. It wasn’t too bad, and it eased off after a while, but it stayed chilly and grey and damp, which was too bad. There weren’t many people out to see the parade, but we got a lot of supportive honking from passing traffic, and a few people did cheer from the sidewalks. Because there were so few of them, they each got their own big cheer from the marchers! I thought that was kind of fun.

The march ended in a car park, where there was a small stage and some tables set up for various organisations. We had a look round, but it started to rain again so I got out my umbrella, which I hadn’t bothered with while we were marching. A lot of folks hadn’t turned up because of the weather, it seemed, because about half of the tables stayed empty and two speakers weren’t there either. We got a few freebies and hung out with zander05, waiting for our friend Gunner to speak - he was the Grand Marshal. It was about 2 when he finished speaking, and most people had left already, so we decided to head home as well. We’d run into another guy I know, who recommended that we take route 2 back rather than the Mass Pike, because the foliage on route 2 was apparently really pretty. We did that, and it was pretty, but it took a while longer than the Pike would have done! We went to Friendly’s for tea, though, which is always good.

On Sunday, we went to the local Harvest Fair, which I used to go to when I was little. It was so much bigger than it used to be! There were some kiddie rides, loads of folks campaigning for mayor or school committee or the board of aldermen, and a ton of stalls selling stuff. We bypassed the jewellery stalls, but paused at one selling handmade ties for $15. Nathaniel found one he loved, which looked like it had an old-world style map on it, so he bought it. There was another stall from a local cable TV station, where one of the folks actually recognised us from the 4th of July last year! Nathaniel got a nice free reusable bag from them. Plus, best of all, there was a stall for Cabot Cheese, where the very nice woman informed me that cheddar cheese is naturally lactose free, which means I can have all I want! (I’m lactose intolerant and Lactaid only sometimes, sort of, works for me - and I don’t like goat cheese, soy-based non-dairy stuff, etc. I only like cow dairy. Usually I eat it anyway and just suffer, because it’s worth it to me.) Apparently you can just check the label on any cheese and if it says Sugars - 0, there’s no lactose. Plus, on Cabot cheeses, it specifically says that they're lactose free if they are. Makes sense to me. I wish I’d figured that out sooner! I was overjoyed at the news.

On Monday, we decided to go to Walden Pond as it was so nice out. I’d only been once before, when I was maybe 13, so I was looking forward to going again. Nathaniel asked if it was near British Delights, a truly excellent shop that we’d been to last year, and I checked the map and found that it was just a little farther away on route 2. So we went to the shop first, intending to go to Walden Pond on the way back.

I really like British Delights, even if the stuff is expensive (understandable as it’s all imported). We managed to restrain ourselves and buy only a few things, even though we hadn’t intended to buy anything! Nathaniel was very excited to find Tunnock’s teacakes, as they’re one of his favourite treats, so we got a little box of those. I got a small bottle of Irn Bru and a little bag of pickled onion Monster Munch. As Nathaniel said, he’s obviously done really well in introducing me to only the best top quality British foods. When we were there last year, I got a thing of Pot Noodle, as it sounded like the Ramen we have here, which I really like. When I went to pay for it, the woman ringing it up looked at me dubiously and asked if I was sure. Unfortunately, I now know why. Maybe it had just been on that shelf for a long time, but it tasted really old - the noodles were a bit too cardboard for my liking, and even the flavouring tasted old and kind of weird. I’ll stick with Ramen, which doesn’t seem to taste any different when it’s been on a shelf for ages. (I’m not sure if that’s actually a good thing ...)

We stopped at Subway on the way to the pond. When I was at the Northeast Unschooling Conference in August, I went to Subway and discovered that all the meats used in their Cold Cut Combo sub - bologna, ham, and salami - are turkey based, rather than pork! I told Nathaniel and he was surprised and pleased by that, so he got one. When we got to the park, we wandered through the woods for a bit - at one point emerging into a cul-de-sac in front of someone’s house with no real idea how we’d got there - until we found the pond, and then sat on a low wall by the water to eat. Then we walked along the trail that runs around the pond, stopping frequently to take pictures. The trail was all fenced off with metal railings and signs warning that you’d be fined if you left the trail. I didn’t remember that from my visit there as a kid. They have a lot of issues with erosion, apparently, and I guess earlier efforts to keep people from climbing all over the hills and making the erosion worse hadn’t worked. It was still a bit much, though, and made it feel less like you were actually out in nature. It’s too bad that they’ve had to resort to that just to get people to stop eroding the hell out of the nature preserve.

Once we’d made our way round the pond, we sat on the low wall again and just enjoyed the view and the peace and quiet. There was a little beach right there with an unattended lifeguard station (‘Swim at your own risk’, etc.), and quite a few people were swimming. Clearly they were far more hardcore than I am; that water must have been freezing cold. At about 3.30, it started to get chilly, so we had a quick look in the gift shop before heading out. Nathaniel got some postcards and commended the guy working there on his choice of music, as he had the Beatles playing. The guy said that one nice thing about his job was that he could basically play whatever he wanted.

On Tuesday, we did errands! I’d been thinking for ages about getting a new mobile phone, so I had a look on T-Mobile’s site to see what I could upgrade to for cheap or free. Nathaniel wondered if he could get a prepaid phone to use while he was here, as it’s expensive for him to use his UK phone in the US, and he wanted to be able to text all his American friends and tweet and keep in touch with me while I was at work. The cheapest one on T-Mobile’s site was $20, but we found a $10 Virgin Mobile phone on Best Buy‘s site, which sounded promising. We went to Best Buy and found the phone, but the packaging said that it did texts and messaging, but didn’t say what messaging protocols (AIM, Yahoo, WLM, ICQ, etc.) it handled. We asked a guy working there, but he wasn’t helpful and didn’t seem to actually have any idea anyway. He said that he didn’t think any of the cheap phones did messaging, but obviously they do, because it’s written on the damn box. I just wanted him to look up the specs for the phone we were looking at, which should have specified the messaging protocols it handles, but he didn’t make any effort to do that. Feh.

We went along to the T-Mobile store and I spent ages playing with a few different phones and agonising over which one to get - they’re only cheap if you sign up for a two-year extension on your plan, which means that I’m stuck with whatever I get for two years, unless I want to shell out a ton of money for my next phone. Finally I decided on a Samsung t239, which is quite a bit nicer than my old t209. Once I was sorted with the new phone, I asked if we could just get a SIM card for my old phone so Nathaniel could use that. The guy was super helpful and helped us choose a plan that was ideal for Nathaniel, who would be doing a lot of texting and not much calling. It was $10, which was a great deal, even when we spent another $10 adding credit to it. So now Nathaniel has a US phone number! He did a load of texting and tweeting with it over the rest of his visit.

On Wednesday, we went to see Cloudy with a Chance of Meatballs. I’d actually never read the book as a kid, but the film looked fun. It was actually really good and quite funny. I highly recommend it.

On Thursday I worked during the afternoon, so Nathaniel got some of his work done while I was gone. When I got home, I found that he’d been so busy working that he’d forgotten to print anything to read at TranScriptions that night! Fortunately he had his stuff on a flash stick, so I printed a few of his poems and we headed out. He spent most of the ride there angsting over whether to read, and what to read if he did. He still hadn’t decided when we arrived, but fortunately (as seems to be the norm with TranScriptions) it started quite late, so he had a little more time to decide. He decided to read three of the four poems we’d printed, and was 9th or something, so we got to see several other people perform before he went up. He was a bit unimpressed with the fact that TranScriptions doesn’t have a rule against performing someone else’s work, the way Gender Crash did, so a lot of folks performed stuff (mostly music) that wasn’t their original work. I don’t mind it quite as much, but it was nice when everyone was performing their own work at Gender Crash.

When it was his turn, Nathaniel introduced himself by saying that he was English (big cheer) and that he might use words or pronunciations that they weren’t familiar with, in which case they should FGI. I had thought that everyone at TranScriptions would get that, but they didn’t seem to, which was disappointing. Nathaniel had to clarify that they should Google it. First he read Out, which went down well; Return to Wonderland is much darker and wasn’t received quite as well, but You Can’t Do Yoga on a Beanbag got a lot of laughs and was a great one to end with. I took lots of pictures (they all came out blurry, unfortunately) and was so proud of him. As he went to take his seat, the MC said something about his accent being so sexy, so I called out, ’He’s mine!‘ She accepted this with good grace. ;)

There was a short break and then the feature came on. This month it was Kielbasia, the Accordion Playing Lunch Lady from the Old Country [Poland], which was fantastic. The artist, Matt, said that usually he gets ready backstage and then is in character when he comes out onstage, but as this was a gender-bending type of venue, he’d decided to get ready onstage instead. While he changed into his costume and applied makeup, he told us about the history of the character and how it had developed, which was really really cool. The performance itself was super fun. I highly recommend it, if you have the opportunity to see it at any point.

Nathaniel got compliments on his poetry afterwards when we were all hanging around and chatting, including from the feature, which was so nice for him. One person said that ’you can’t do yoga on a beanbag’ are words to live by which made him really happy.

On Friday I went to work again and Nathaniel did more work at home, and wrote his LJ post. Otherwise we just hung out and rested, which was nice after such a busy week!

On Saturday, we just did errands and wandered round a local mall, which was hardly thrilling but was still nice. I always tell Nathaniel that I'm not super fussed about what we do - I don't need it to be exciting or even especially interesting, as long as we're together. So we had a day that was neither exciting nor especially interesting. We did go to Uno's, where Nathaniel was very pleased to see that he had lots of choices for foods that didn't involve red meat or pasta, and he angsted a bit over what to get. He finally decided on the firecracker chicken burger, which was grilled chicken with lettuce and tomato, plus buffalo cheese and Uno's special firecracker sauce. We don't know what was in the sauce, but surprisingly, it tasted like it could have come from McDonald's. I think it might have been the pickle in it. Also surprisingly, this quality did not detract from the taste, so Nathaniel quite enjoyed his sandwich. He also got their mashed potatoes with cheese and sour cream on top (he asked for it without the bacon that usually comes on top as well), which is so good. It's like their pizza skins without the pizza crust and is one of my favourite things ever. We tried their 'mini' desserts, but as I don't like vanilla ice cream or 'whipped topping', I just wound up with a very small brownie with some hot fudge sauce on top. It was still tasty though! Nathaniel's 'mini' dessert, on the other hand, was huge. He had the Mini Macadamia Nut White Chocolate Chunk Deep Dish Cookie Sundae, which is as big as its name. The cookie was about 4 inches across and a good half inch thick, with a large scoop of vanilla ice cream, a generous amount of 'whipped topping' and lots of fudge sauce. Nathaniel loved it.

On Sunday, we trooped out to the annual Oktoberfest and Honk! Festival Parade in Harvard Square. Nathaniel had read about it in US Airways magazine on the flight over and thought it sounded really interesting, so off we went. Six stages of live entertainment, 50+ International Food Vendors and an outdoor market with over 200 vendors, artists, vintage items, and sidewalk sales. Apparently. We walked to our closest Dunkies for breakfast, as is our custom, and then headed off, since Oktoberfest didn't start until noon. We got there at about 1.15, so we just caught the tail end of the parade. We wandered round and looked at all the stalls, but we kept finding more and more stalls along different streets, so we wound up making the same loop a few times to make sure we'd seen everything! We were very impressed with the Big Skinny stall, which was selling wallets and purses that were specially made to be thinner than normal wallets. One of the people on the stall turned out to be the man behind the company. He showed us an empty leather wallet and one of their wallets which had 16 plastic cards in, and the leather one was much thicker even empty! He also said that he usually put several cards in one pocket but they never fit, so he'd designed the pockets to be wider to accommodate more plastic, and they're lined with rubber so the cards don't fall out if you open it upside down. Nathaniel had been wanting a new wallet, and he was attracted to the ~~shiny~~ bright colours these ones came in, so he got a nice bright blue one. It was only $20, and as it's made from microfiber, it's machine washable too! We were both very impressed, but I'm going to wait a while before getting a new wallet, as my old one is still fine.

A couple of stalls had spin-the-wheel games with prizes; from Wagamama, we both won metal keyrings with bottle openers on one end, and Nathaniel also won a coupon for a free juice when you purchase a meal. I didn't win anything from Carolina Rice, but Nathaniel won a sample bag of jasmine rice. Then, from Kangogift.com, Nathaniel won a cup of coffee and I won a cookie! We both really liked the idea of Kangogift.com. The idea is that person A buys a gift for person B, person B gets a text about it, then they go into the shop to pick up their present! Isn't that a great idea? It's still a new thing so there's not much on the site yet, which is a shame. (It was extra cool because the bloke on the stall was also called Nathaniel, except he goes by Thad, which we hadn't heard of before. He was extremely pleased to meet a fellow Nathaniel!)

We got so many freebies, of 'varying awesomeness', as Nathaniel said. Nantucket Nectars and Fuze gave out little cups with samples of their drinks - you could choose from a bunch of flavours to try - and Venom Energy gave out entire bottles of their drinks! Dunkies gave out gift cards which had the possibility of being already worth $50; we got three, but none of them had money on. They were supposed to all have a free coffee, but when we tried to use them, we were told that they didn't have anything on them, and the people didn't know anything about the promotional offer, which kind of sucked. Amnesty International had some petitions that I signed, and we got a free thing of poetry magnets. Floyd's Barbershop was giving out coupons for a free haircut, and one of the people there turned out to be an old high school friend of mine! She gave me a big hug and her phone number and said that we had to get together sometime and hang out. It was great to see her, and the whole thing was so much fun. I'm so glad Nathaniel told me about it!

On Monday, we were worn out from all the walking, so we had a quiet day at home. Nathaniel made sausage cacciatore with a recipe from Caden, who got it from his Italian-American mother, so it's authentic Italian food! It was really simple, but very tasty, even despite the presence of tomatoes, which I can't stand. Nathaniel put in plenty of Worcestershire sauce, basil, oregano and garlic which helped disguise that nasty tomato taste for me. He's so good to me. After tea, though, I had a craving for cake, so we had to make an emergency cake run to the supermarket. Yum.

On Tuesday it was kind of gross out, so we tried to find indoor stuff to do. We couldn't find a museum that was both interesting and not overpriced (besides the Science Museum, which we already had plans to go to another day with my cousin), so Nathaniel suggested that we go back to the arcade in Somerville that we went to last year. When I checked their website, it said that they'd been closed since June 2008! We couldn't really find any others, except one in Framingham that was closed on Tuesdays. Arcades have really died a death since home gaming consoles have become popular, which is understandable but kind of sad. We wound up hanging out at home, and Nathaniel tried to work more on a couple of DS games that he was stuck on. He didn't manage to make any progress with them, so he decided to trade them in at GameStop at some point.

On Wednesday, we road-tripped it up to the LL Bean outlet in Freeport, Maine with Caden. Both Caden and I had been needing to go for ages - me to return stuff, him to get a discounted winter coat. He got to us at about 11, so we set off immediately. We stopped in Kennebunk to get food at Burger King, so by the time we got there, it was 2.15. We had until 3 to shop so that we could get Caden back in time for him to go to work, so we hardly had any time at all! Fortunately Caden knew what he wanted, so he and I returned our stuff and he went to look for his coat while Nathaniel looked at plain white long-sleeved T-shirts. I used the gift card I'd got for my returns to get him a shirt, which he was pleased about. Caden got his coat at a 40% discount, which made him happy. We made it home in just about two hours instead of three. It must have been by magic (and because we didn't stop for anything), because I never ever speed. Ever.

On Thursday, before I left for work, I got out some sidewalk chalk I've had for a million years and told Nathaniel he could go draw outside if he wanted. I'd been meaning to do that for ages, as apparently kids don't draw outside with chalk in the UK, which I think is terrible. I hadn't been at work long, though, when I got a text from Nathaniel saying he was locked out of the house! He'd already been outside for about an hour, it was quite cold, and it would be at least another two hours until I got home. We don't have a spare key outside, and the neighbours don't have them anymore, so I had to tell Nathaniel how to get through the bulkhead into the basement. He was still locked out of the rest of the house, but at least it was a little warmer. Fortunately, my mother came home early and let him in about an hour after he'd made his way into the basement. He had mostly warmed up by the time I got home, and he showed me all the stuff he'd drawn on the driveway and the front walk, which was completely adorable. I'm glad he took pictures, because it rained a bit overnight and most of his stuff washed away! Woe.

On Friday morning, we went off to GameStop so Nathaniel could trade in his DS games for store credit. He got My Sims Agents, which looks incredibly cute. Then we just wandered round the area and looked at various shops - there's a toy shop that sells nothing but puzzle stuff, which we love - and headed home before I had to go to work.

On Saturday, after I went to karate and Nathaniel wrote out postcards, we decided to go apple picking. We decided to go to Shelburne Farm in Stow, as it had lots of different kinds of apples and was open until 6. It was quite busy when we got there, but the orchard was so huge that there weren't many folks near us as we walked and picked apples. We bought a peck (~10 lbs.) bag, which was $16, and found the Fuji trees first. We'd done a bit of apple research and found that Fuji are ideal for baking, so we mostly filled our bag with those. Nathaniel wanted to get a couple of Jonagold apples, but those trees had mostly been picked clean, so it took us a while to find two nice ones. Finally we went and got some Red Delicious, which are great to just eat as-is, and which I love. We also got pumpkins for jack-o-lanterns while we were there, which was really nice.

Before we left, we had a look round their shop - they have some seriously cute apple-themed stuff - and then got some mulled cider to share. Nathaniel calls it apple juice, because all cider is alcoholic in the UK but obviously it's not (the alcoholic stuff is hard cider), but I keep telling him it's not just plain apple juice! It has spices and stuff in! The cider here was a little too cinnamony, but it was still good. We got a cider doughnut too, which was minuscule, but still tasty. We went to Uno's on the way home, where Nathaniel got a crunchy chicken wrap and pumpkin tiramisu for dessert. It's pumpkin spice cake topped with a pumpkin mousse, maple-soaked sponge fingers and cinnamon whipped cream, garnished with candied pecans. Nathaniel loved it, but it was such a huge piece! It was at least 4 inches by 2 and a good 2 inches high. He wound up taking half of it home. I had their rattlesnake pasta, which was so tasty. I actually have a recipe for it and I'll have to make it sometime, because it was amazing. Pasta, lots of cheese, and some jalapeño to give it a kick. Awesome.

On Sunday, we had plans to meet up with D11 and D14 and their mom and go see the Head of the Charles regatta, because their dad's a rower and would actually be rowing in an alumni crew, plus the crew he coaches was rowing. As it turned out, D11 had more sense and went to a friend's house rather than be out in the miserable weather. It was cold and raining and just nasty. We met D14 and his mom K at Harvard Square, and she took us down to the river and to Harvard's boathouse for a bit of shelter. It gave us a great view, but we'd only just dried off when we headed back out to look at all the stalls. We didn't realise there would be so many! There were tons, and they had loads of amazing free stuff. We got mini bottles of hot sauce, a large box of salad with a tub of dressing each, a small tub of Turkey Hill ice cream, granola cereal and granola bar, various flavours of Lärabars, a dozen packs of gummy vitamins and little packs of biodegradable washing up liquid. Green Mountain had a stall with coffee dispensers, and they were giving away free cups of coffee! They had several different kinds available. I don't drink coffee, but Nathaniel does, and when he got a cup, he was given a sample pack of coffee plus a couple of coupons for $1.50 off! Despite the fact that we were getting wetter and wetter with every passing minute, we were also having a lot of fun seeing what the next stall had to offer us and finding room in our pockets for all our stuff!

Finally, even though we hadn't seen all the stalls, we were cold and wet and decided to give up. We went to Au Bon Pain, where we got some seriously good soup - I had chicken noodle, of course, and Nathaniel had chicken dumpling as he's weird and doesn't like pasta. We said goodbye to D14 and K and took the T home. Later on, the rain turned to snow! Wtf. It didn't really accumulate, but it was pretty to watch.

On Monday, we had plans to meet up with assiduous1, but not until 5, so we used most of the day to bake apple stuff. Nathaniel had a look at various recipes and we decided to start with the sour cream apple cinnamon coffee cake, which my mother used to make when I was little. (I don't like sour cream at all, but the cake doesn't taste of it any more than regular cake tastes of milk - it just gets its moisture from it.) We had to go to the supermarket for butter, sour cream, and walnuts, but we still had just enough time to make the cake. It's done in a Bundt (ring) tin, which is dusted with cinnamon sugar, then half the cake batter on the bottom, topped with sliced apples, walnuts and cinnamon sugar, then the rest of the cake mix. And then more cinnamon sugar. It had to be cooled in the pan for exactly 20 minutes after baking, or else it wouldn't come out in one piece, so we had to wait rather than just run out once it was out of the oven. We ended up leaving at 4.20 and managed to catch The Slowest T Ever™, so we were a little late in meeting up with Aden and his girlfriend. We wandered into Chinatown and went to the Gourmet Dumpling House for tea. I had udon noodles with chicken and veggies, which was so tasty. I seem to have developed a taste for udon noodles after trying them at a Japanese restaurant in August. After tea, we went across the street to Bao Bao Bakery & Café. They had loads of choices, and a decent-sized slice of cake was only $1.95. Nathaniel got some cheesecake and I got chocolate cake, both of which were pretty good!

On Tuesday, I got to work an early morning, which means getting up at 4 to be at work by 5, so D11 and D14's dad can leave at 5.15 to go row with his crew. (Their mom was out of town.) Fortunately, unless they have the day off from school, an early morning is over for me by about 8 am, but I generally don't go to bed when I get home. I also had a doctor's appointment at 12.40, but as my doctor's office is near where slammerkinbabe works in Boston, we'd arranged to meet up with her while we were downtown. We'd arranged to meet in the Boston Public Library, but Kylie was running a little late, so I had to leave Nathaniel there and go to my appointment before she arrived. My appointment went fine - I had a chat with my doctor and gave five vials of blood for my annual bloodwork, and went back to the library feeling very hungry indeed. I hadn't eaten at all since the night before because my doctor likes to do a fasting glucose test just as part of my routine bloodwork (I'm not entirely sure why since I've never had blood sugar problems), and I usually bring cookies or something to have after I have blood drawn, but I didn't have any today. Plus I'd been up since 4! I didn't feel sick or lightheaded though, just really hungry.

I texted Nathaniel when I got back to the BPL to ask where they were, and found them on the third floor admiring and discussing the huge mural by John Singer Sargent that's up there. Kylie said there was some stuff she wanted to look at in the Rare Books & Manuscripts room, so we wandered up that way, but we got told that we couldn't go in without being library members, so Nathaniel and I had to sign up for guest cards that expire after a year. We were both amused that when I was in England, I joined the Bolton library, and now he's joined the Boston library! I think collecting library cards is much cooler than stickers all over your suitcase.

Once we'd filled out all our paperwork and locked all our stuff in the lockers they provided - you can't have cameras, phones, big coats with pockets, or much of anything else when you go in there - we went ~~through the airlock~~ into the Reading Room, only to find that the items we wanted to see were unavailable because they were going up into an exhibit in the library. The woman working there was really helpful but said it was hard to know what to show us without knowing our areas of interest. I'm so not an academic - I don't have an area of interest! I just wanted to see stuffs! She could've pulled something out at random and we probably would have been impressed with it. As it was, she showed us a mediaeval psalter, which was ready for a school trip later on. It was absolutely beautiful, with really vibrant colours and loads of detail. I think Nathaniel and Kylie were more taken with it than I was, but I was still impressed. Nathaniel impressed the woman with some of his observations and I was all proud of him. She was so into it, really enthusiastic, and you could tell that she loved her job, which always makes it so much more interesting. It's hard to get excited about something if the person showing it to you is obviously not terribly interested. When we were saying goodbye to her, we found out that she was the Curator of Manuscripts! Very cool. All curators should be as psyched about the stuff they're curating as she was.

We had to say goodbye to Kylie so she could get back to work, but we stayed in the city for a while since we were already there and it was still early. We went to Wendy's for food first, as I still hadn't eaten, and then decided to go to Newbury Street and look at all the shops. Disappointingly, all our favourite shops were gone, except for Newbury Comics! Nathaniel spent $50 on belts in an effort to boost the American economy, bless him. As we were walking back to the T stop, we passed the Lindt shop, so I asked Nathaniel if we needed Lindt. He replied that he wasn't sure, so we should go in and check. It's a good thing we checked, because as it turned out, we did need Lindt!

On Wednesday I was worn out from being up so early on Tuesday and not eating enough and walking around the city, so we had a quiet day at home. We did go out to the bank briefly, so Nathaniel finished his postcards and posted them while we were out.

We had ordered a replacement battery for Nathaniel's iRiver on eBay, so I spent some time replacing it. I had to buy an eyeglass repair kit to get a screwdriver the right size, as I'd lost my old one, but I finally managed to get the battery replaced! Nathaniel was very pleased about that.

On Thursday I went to work as usual, while Nathaniel did his work at home, preparing a Powerpoint presentation for the Transgender Day of Remembrance, which is pretty upsetting work to do. When I got home, we made enchiladas and had our homemade coffee cake with ice cream afterwards, and tried to focus on nice things and be grateful for them and each other.

On Friday we drove up to Vermont for the Translating Identity Conference! We were very organised and brought sandwiches so we wouldn't get overpriced food on the way up. We left at about 1, which would still get us there before dark, so that worked. We had to stop in New Hampshire for food, but since we just ate in the car, we were back on our way pretty quickly. We got to the motel and checked in at about 5, and wound up in a room just across the hall from the one we'd stayed in two years ago at TIC! We were going to go to Friendly's for tea, but there was a '50s-style diner across the street that I'd been to once before and enjoyed, so we decided to go there. There wasn't a lot of choice for poor Nathaniel, but he did manage to find something nice to eat - another grilled chicken burger, but with barbecue sauce this time. I had a yummy turkey club sandwich with potato chips and a pickle.

On Saturday, we had to be up at 7 in order to get to UVM for the start of TIC at 9. We managed to find one of the only two Dunkies in the area (wtf, Burlington?), but then it took us 45 minutes to find parking. UVM is not very visitor-parking-friendly. Then we climbed the stairs up to the 4th floor, looked around, and were told that registration was actually on the first floor. We took the left back down and up again.

The workshops were great, but TIC really needs to be over two days - there were just too many great options per time slot. I went to both of Samuel Lurie's workshops, and both were excellent. Nathaniel didn't come with me to the first one, but he came to the second one with me. It was called Teaching Trans, and we got several ideas of exercises to use in gigs, plus ideas for community resources to implement over time.

There was the opportunity for you to create your own workshop if you thought there was something missing from the schedule, so Nathaniel and I signed up to do one on Trans-Trans relationships, as there was one for partners of FTMs and one for partners of MTFs, but both were for partners only and weren't clear on whether that included partners who were also Trans - and usually, if they don't specify that, they're not super thrilled to have Trans people there even if they're willing to let them in. Unfortunately, as we had to sign up kind of last-minute, no one came! I wrote on the feedback form that they should really have something on Trans-Trans relationships next year, so hopefully we won't have to create our own at the last minute again.

Miss Major was the keynote and she was awesome. I really enjoyed hearing her talk and seeing the short video she'd brought about her organisation, TGIJP (Transgender, Gender Variant, and Intersex Justice Project) in California. After the keynote, it was time to meet up with trannytrent! He'd been supposed to do a workshop, but had to call in sick. He recovered enough to go to Applebees, which was fun. I hadn't seen him in a few years, so it was fantastic to get to hang out with him a bit, even if all three of us were kind of worn out. And I was so glad that Nathaniel finally got to meet him! It's always so nice to get to meet online friends. After that, it was back to the motel to crash!

On Sunday, we took our time getting up and going as checkout wasn't until noon, and we didn't really have anywhere to be. We drove into Burlington and parked near Lake Champlain so we could walk to the Skinny Pancake, a crêpe place that TJ had recommended. It was super busy, and it took us a few minutes to figure out that you ordered your food and then just hung out waiting for a table to become free, and then grabbed it before someone else could! We thought for a while that we were going to have to eat outside in the cold wind, but a table opened up just before our food was ready. Nathaniel had the Easy Rider, which had fried egg and cheese, and I had the Lumberjack, which had ham and cheese. They were wicked good! Apparently it's only that busy on Sundays, which was just our luck, but it worked out and I'm glad we went.

We walked back down to the lake and took a load of pictures until our hands were too cold to carry on, then walked up to Church Street. We found a great sweet shop and I got a bunch of yummy stuff, including several hard candy sticks because they were only 25 each. I also got a piece of chocolate orange peel, which I love but which is always really expensive so I can't buy big bags of it like I want to.

Later on, Nathaniel spotted an illustrated copy of Dracula in the window of a second-hand bookshop, so we went in and checked it out. The illustrations were done in a comic book style that looked really cool, so Nathaniel got it - for only $9! Then I had to go to the ATM, and on the little counter by the ATM was a Bookcrossing book! The book itself didn't really appeal to either of us, but Nathaniel thought his mother would love it, so he picked it up for her. We both love the idea of the book going all the way to the UK to be released.

Before we drove home, we went into the shopping centre to use the toilets, and we popped into Spencer's Gifts as it was right there, just to have a look. Nathaniel found a fleecy throw that has the Sgt Pepper cover art on, for only $20. I ~~pressured~~ encouraged him to get it and I'm really glad I did. He's in love with it and it now has pride of place on his bed. We were both entertained that he had to go to Vermont to get it, rather than Liverpool! And then it was time to drive home to Boston, which took only three hours and gave us a beautiful sunset to watch. Not bad at all.

Monday was spent relaxing at home, as I was worn out from all the driving. We made another apple cake, amusingly called New York Nobby Apple Cake, which was much easier than the previous one. It looked like it was going to have way too much apple and very little cake, but the apples reduced down a lot so it turned out fine. It was seriously tasty, but very sticky.

Later, Nathaniel made sausages and onion gravy with mash. I'm used to only really having gravy on Thanksgiving, whereas Nathaniel's used to having it with just about everything! This suits me fine, as I love gravy. One notable year, my cousin and I were given our own separate gravy boat because the family knew that if we were expected to share the regular one, no one else would get any! Nathaniel showed me how to make gravy from scratch without roasting a turkey to get drippings for it, and it was seriously good. I'll have to make a lot more of it!

On Tuesday, Nathaniel decided to make French toast for breakfast. Before we'd gone to Vermont, we'd attempted to make some bread from a beer bread mix that we'd picked up at Trader Joe's - you can use any fizzy drink if you don't want to use beer, and you basically just add it to the mix, put it in a loaf pan, and bake it. We used ginger ale, and the bread didn't taste of ginger ale at all, and came out really dense and rather dry. Maybe we should've used soda with a stronger flavour. I had tried toasting a slice, which made it a little less dense for some reason, so Nathaniel decided to turn it into French toast. It wasn't bad, although it didn't soak up the egg mixture very well.

The weather wasn't great, so we decided to check out an arcade in Saugus, as it was Tuesday again and the one in Framingham would be shut. After nearly an hour of driving, we finally found it - and it was shut too! We were most unimpressed. We wound up wandering round the Square One Mall as it was right there. It wasn't particularly interesting, except for the pet shop, so we spent quite a while looking at the puppies. They were all in individual glass-fronted cubicles and some kind of plastic mesh on the floor, and maybe one toy each. They didn't seem particularly interested, and most of them were sleeping. It made both of us want to buy them all just to get them out of there. It doesn't seem right that dogs should be on display like that; it doesn't seem healthy for them at all. I'm not a fan of pet shops generally, but at least the one near me keeps two or three puppies in each (decent-sized) enclosure with a few toys, so they can play and generally socialise and be more used to other dogs, which seems much healthier than keeping them totally isolated.

From the mall we walked to the Super Stop & Shop next door, pleased that it had turned out to be pretty warm even though it wasn't sunny. We picked up a few necessities and then came home, where Nathaniel made yummy sweet and sour vegetables with Quorn pieces. He was so pleased with himself for making real sweet and sour sauce, and it was super tasty. We watched Empire Records, which I hadn't seen in several years, and which was a fun end to the day.

On Wednesday it was chilly and drizzly and generally not very nice out, so we decided to try again at Fun & Games in Framingham. We also found out that a friend of ours had had her baby on Sunday! She's a teacher at the high school where we usually do speaking gigs. We wanted to find a present, and I knew she and her wife would be overrun with baby stuff and would probably benefit more from a gift that they could use, so Nathaniel suggested gift cards to Dunkies and Lush, which was a great idea.

Before we left for Fun & Games, I called them to make sure they were open - I didn't want to drive for another hour to another closed arcade. I just got a recorded message, but it listed their hours, and apparently they were open! When we got there, it was totally empty except for a few workmen and two employees who must have been bored stiff (surprisingly they weren't playing any games - maybe they were forbidden to, or had played everything and were sick of it), so Nathaniel and I had the run of the whole arcade. It wasn't very big, but it did have a bunch of games, including Skee ball! I love Skee ball. We had a few goes on the Skee ball and got some tickets, then tried their two basketball games - one of which had mini basketballs and was probably for younger kids, the other of which used full sized balls and looked to be for bigger people. They were both a lot of fun, and I wished I had lots of tokens so I could keep trying the big one! After two tries on that one, though, both Nathaniel and I were really sore. We got a few tickets out of it, though.

They had a couple of classic arcade games, including Dig Dug, which I had on my computer when I was little and loved, so I had to have a go with that. Then we tried one of the shooting games, where you fired balls at a clown's face, trying to knock down its five teeth. I knocked them all down on the first try, which surprised the hell out of me, and got me 9 tickets. Nathaniel also knocked them all down, but because he only took four balls to do it, the machine thought he wasn't done, so it only gave him three tickets. Poor boy. When we'd run out of tokens, I had 62 tickets and Nathaniel had 53. He'd had his eye on a little stuffed dog that cost 45 tickets, and he was so pleased to be able to get it! I spent all mine on sweets, as I already have too many little cheapy toys.

We ran a couple of errands in the increasing rain, including getting the Dunkies card, before hurrying home and hiding where it was warm and dry.

On Thursday, we had a speaking gig at my old college! First, though, Nathaniel wanted to go to Floyd's Barbershop (which turned out to be a seriously cool place and which you should all patronise) and get a haircut from my high school friend whom we met at Oktoberfest. We drove to the college and parked, then rode the T the rest of the way to the barbershop. It's near Newbury Street, where there's a Lush, so I left Nathaniel in C's capable hands and ran to Newbury Street - and then most of the way down Newbury Street - to get the gift card, then made my way back along Boylston Street at a more sedate pace. The Lush was totally empty except for three staff members in what looked like clown make-up, which totally confused me, plus I wasn't entirely sure if they were all staff, and I think I looked wildly out of place and a bit scared. The girl who ~~took pity on me~~ helped me was very nice, though, even when I declined to take advantage of their special offer - something about if I spent $40, I'd get some thingy, or a discount on something else, or something. All I remember is the 'spend $40' bit.

When I got back to Floyd's, Nathaniel had considerably less hair - particularly on the back and sides - and was looking really quite sexy for it. He'd brought a few pictures of the Tenth Doctor so C could get him all ready to be Ten for Hallowe'en, and she did a great job. When she got some hair wax and feathered his hair up, it looked just like Ten's. I was very impressed. And then the jammy sod got a neck massage! No one told me that was part of the deal! I've cut my own hair for years, but I think I'll have to go have C cut my hair sometime if there's a neck massage involved. It was just a brief going-over with one of those hand-held vibrating neck massagers, but even that would be amazing for me. I carry my tension mainly in my neck and shoulders, so they're always tight even when I try to stretch and work on them myself.

Then we rode the T back to the gig, which was a pretty small class, and they were quiet and looked pretty shell-shocked through the whole thing. I think we broke their brains. Their teacher assured us that they weren't very talkative generally, and that they were definitely taking everything in and processing it even though they didn't look excited about all the fascinating stuff we were telling them. Just as we finished with the four-line exercise, two more people arrived to be on a panel with us, which was excellent timing. One was a 15 year old Trans girl, and the other was an adult who identified as Two-Spirit and used masculine pronouns. I'd not really heard first-hand from a Two-Spirit person before, even though I know what it means, so that was really cool for me. We got more questions as we went along, which was good, and all in all it was quite a good gig. It ended at about 6.30, so we went off to Friendly's for tea!

Friday we just hung out and then I went to work. It was nice to have a rest as we had a busy weekend coming up!

Saturday was Hallowe'en. I was the Ninth Doctor and Nathaniel was the Tenth Doctor. I ultimately wasn't able to find a leather jacket like Nine's, so I wound up wearing an old brown suede jacket my mother offered me. It was too small and I felt like it looked a bit girly, but it was a lot better than nothing, and Nathaniel said it looked okay. Nathaniel was fucking gorgeous in his suit and I had to restrain myself from jumping on him from the moment I saw him in it. Fortunately my mother was also present at that particular moment, so I behaved myself.

We spent most of the day carving jack-o-lanterns; mine had wolves howling, and Nathaniel's was the same one I did last year, of the Tenth Doctor and the TARDIS. We got a load of compliments on them, including one dad in a bunny costume who asked if we'd carve his next year! We said we'd be happy to, for a small fee. One group of teens asked if we were artists, so I explained about templates and said that you could get them at CVS. Pictures forthcoming.

On Sunday we went to the Harry Potter exhibition at the Museum of Science with my cousin Cathy, which was so much fun. I highly recommend it if you're into Harry Potter at all. It was So Awesome OMG. So many cool props and costumes! Unfortunately they didn't allow any photography, so we only got two pictures - one of the flying blue Ford Anglia from Chamber of Secrets, the other of the giant chess piece that Ron uses in Philosopher's Stone - because they were on display in the main museum. Nathaniel got a Slytherin pen from their overpriced HP shop, because he'd been wanting it for ages, but Cathy and I didn't get anything. There was a hoodie I loved the look of, but it was $70. No thanks.

We spent a while in the main museum after that, which I always love, and then said goodbye to Cathy so we could get to D11 and D14's house on time for tea! Their mom had invited us over, which was so nice. They had another couple over too, who were very nice folks, and we had fun chatting to them and their son, who I think was 14 also. D11 and D14 ate with us and hung out with us a bit, and D11 got out his telescope and set it up so we could all look at the moon, which was full and very pretty. I was so glad Nathaniel got to meet D11 and D14 and their parents, because they're such a cool family, and he's already met D15 (who's part of a different family). Finally we came home and crashed after our very busy day!

On Monday we hung out and relaxed after our busy weekend. We went out to do a few errands - bank and Social Security office and supermarket - but otherwise just took it easy. Nathaniel had been given an ID number when he studied here for a semester several years ago, and they told him it was a Social Security number, so we wanted to verify that and - if it did turn out to be valid - change his name with them. (As it turned out, it was in SSN format - i.e., 123-45-6789 - but wasn't a valid SSN, which is what I'd figured.) I was so glad that I'd checked the Social Security website for locations, because we had been about to leave to go to North Station - but when I checked the website, it turned out there was one much closer to home! So we just drove over there and it was so much easier. I really hope that office didn't exist yet in 2000 when I changed my name; if it did and I hauled my arse all the way up to North Station for no reason, I'll be annoyed.

On Tuesday we went to vote, a new experience for Nathaniel (in the US). Then we went to one of my favourite local parks for a while, before heading home so Nathaniel could pack. He spent the rest of the afternoon packing, while I did stuff online - trying to catch up on LJ, mostly. We watched The Lost Boys, which Nathaniel likes and I hadn't seen before, and went to Friendly's for tea.

On Wednesday we hung out and Nathaniel finished the last bits of his packing before Caden arrived to take us to the airport. Letting go of my boy was so hard - all the more so when he decided to take an earlier flight, because the woman at the check-in desk said that if he took the later flight, he wouldn't really have enough time to catch his connecting flight in Philly. We still got a bit of time together before he had to go, and I stayed watching him through security until he waved one last time and disappeared to find his gate. Then I hung out in the terminal, texting with Nathaniel until he had to turn his phone off, and then texting people in the hope of some virtual hugs until I was sure that his flight had taken off. Only then did I go downstairs to catch the silver line, as I'd decided to go to South Station and get a bus home rather than take the T out - my car wasn't at the T stop since Caden had dropped us off, and I didn't want to walk all the way home from the T stop or pay for a taxi. I had a hard time finding the bus stop, as it turned out to not actually be at South Station, just near it. I wandered around for a while in Chinatown before I saw a bus, chased after it until I found a bus stop, then waited for 15 minutes before a bus came - and told me I wanted to be a block over, as he was going inbound and I wanted to go outbound. (They were one-way streets; otherwise I would've just had to cross over to go the other way.) Finally I got on the right bus, and listened to my iRiver on the ride home. When I got home, I stayed awake for ages because I didn't want to go to sleep without Nathaniel, but ultimately I did. Such a small bed shouldn't feel so big and empty.

Now we count down until May, when Nathaniel will hopefully be returning!

US, MA: MTPC Praises Federal Hate Crimes Law Signing

ftmichael — Wed, 28 Oct 2009 20:55:27 GMT

Massachusetts Transgender Political Coalition Praises Federal Hate Crimes Law Signing

For Immediate Release

Boston MA - The Massachusetts Transgender Political Coalition (MTPC), the region's leading transgender advocacy organization, praises President Obama today for signing the FY2010 Defense Authorization Bill, which includes the Matthew Shepard Hate Crimes Prevention Act. This historic legislation is the first major federal law to recognize the existence of, and provide civil rights protections for, transgender people. It provides for the tracking of hate crimes based on sexual orientation, gender identity, gender and disability, providing assistance to local authorities and gathering information about these crimes.

"This is a great thing for our transgender community, and we're grateful to our elected representatives for their good work on this," said MTPC executive director Gunner Scott. "But it doesn't change the need for statewide legislation. We're still waiting for action on our civil rights from the state legislature." HB1728, "An Act Relative to Gender-Based Discrimination and Hate Crimes," has 105 co-sponsors, enough to guarantee passage in both the House and Senate, but it is still pending a report out from the Joint Committee on the Judiciary.

"This comes at a time of special significance for the transgender community," said MTPC director Gunner Scott. "Each November 20th transgender community worldwide observes Transgender Day of Remembrance, a day to honor transgender victims of hate motivated murder. To this day, transgender people suffer widespread discrimination, harassment and violence simply for being who they are. The passage of this federal level hate crimes law is the first step towards changing this shameful situation."

The week of Nov 15-20th, leading up to Transgender Day of Remembrance, has been declared by MTPC as Transgender Awareness Week, a time for outreach and education about transgender issues. More information about events this week is available at http://www.masstpc.org.

"The Transgender Day of Remembrance is a moving and vital event for our community," says Nancy Nangeroni, ad hoc chair of Boston Transgender Day of Remembrance Organizing Committee. "Too many of our sisters and brothers are suffering because of the systemic marginalization of all gender non-conforming people, and this event draws our attention to the most heinous effects of what more and more people are recognizing as unjust oppression."

About MTPC
The Massachusetts Transgender Political Coalition (MTPC) is dedicated to ending discrimination on the basis of gender identity and gender expression. We envision a world where persons of all genders are treated with respect and fully participate in all areas of society, free from fear of prohibition, harassment or violence based on their gender identity and/or expression.

US: Victory on Federal Hate Crimes Legislation!

ftmichael — Mon, 26 Oct 2009 20:46:35 GMT

Victory on Federal Hate Crimes Legislation!
23 October 2009

Dear friends,

It's incredible.

Yesterday, the Senate passed the Matthew Shepard and James Byrd, Jr. Hate Crimes Prevention Act, a major piece of national civil rights legislation for lesbian, gay, bisexual and Transgender Americans. The Act broadens the definition of federal hate crimes to include those motivated by a victim's gender identity or sexual orientation. It gives victims the same federal safeguards already afforded to people who are attacked because of their race, colour, religion or national origin.

Now that the bill has passed both the House and the Senate, it's on to President Obama for his signature. He has promised to sign the bill into law.

This is huge. Our supporters have spoken out, written letters to elected officials, and signed petitions demanding hate crime protections for our community. Your efforts have paid off in a big way.

We've spent countless hours working to educate the public about the urgent need for LGBT-inclusive hate crimes legislation. When I spoke with Carmella Etienne -- who was the victim of a hate-motivated attack in Queens this past summer -- she was overjoyed at the news that federal protections were on the way. When I spoke with Roxanne Green, the mother of slain Transgender woman Lateisha Green, she was ecstatic to hear the news. The thought that all she and her family had endured, committing themselves to speaking out about anti-LGBT hate violence when they just wanted to curl up and make the pain of their loss go away, was overwhelming. That the passage of the bill comes near the one year anniversary of Teish's death made the news that much more meaningful to her.

Hate-motivated violence doesn't just target an individual. It targets an entire community, and it's meant to make us fearful on the streets where we live, work, and socialise. It undermines the promise of equality, and it affects us all on a deeply personal level. There are days when the many stories of hate violence make me so mad I could spit nails. There are other days when it all just makes me want to cry. But today, I feel a sense of
hope. Justice is on the way.

You can spin a globe, drop your finger down on it, and be pretty well assured that it will land on a spot in the world where LGBT people are targeted for hate violence, and where the government either turns a blind eye to that violence, or actively encourages and even participates in it. To have our government - finally - say that things must be different and that it will use all of the resources at its disposal to combat the hate violence that LGBT people still face on a daily basis sends a powerful message to Americans and to the world.

Yesterday, we took a huge step forward on the road to equal rights. There's still so much to be done, but with your continued support, we will put an end to violence and discrimination directed at people simply because they live openly and honestly as who they are.

Thank you for everything you've done to help make this moment a reality. Let's savour it.

Very best wishes,
Michael Silverman
Executive Director

Transgender Legal Defense & Education Fund is committed to ending discrimination based upon gender identity and expression, and to achieving equality for Transgender people through public education, test-case litigation, direct legal services, community organising and public policy efforts.

Know someone who might be interested in our work? Forward this!

Transgender Legal Defense & Education Fund
151 W 19TH ST STE 1103
NEW YORK NY 10011

US, NY: Appellate Court Strikes Down 'Doctor’s Note' Requirement for Trans Name Changes

ftmichael — Thu, 22 Oct 2009 02:57:34 GMT

http://transgenderlegal.org/headline_show.php?id=181

Victory! Appellate Court Strikes Down “Doctor’s Note” Requirement for Transgender Name Changes

October 21, 2009 - A New York State appeals court today struck down a lower court’s requirement that transgender people seeking to change their names provide medical evidence of their need for the name change. The ruling was handed down in an appeal we filed on behalf of Olin Winn-Ritzenberg, a transgender man whose petition to change his name to Olin was denied by the lower court because he had failed to provide a letter from a doctor, therapist or social worker establishing his need to change his name.

But the appellate court wrote, "[t]here is no sound basis in law or policy to engraft upon the statutory provisions an additional requirement that a transgendered-petitioner present medical substantiation for the desired name change." The court's decision sends a powerful message that transgender people must be treated equally and that they cannot be subjected to different legal requirements than everyone else. People’s names are fundamental to their identities. This decision confirms that each one of us has the right to be known by a name we choose. That decision can’t be second-guessed by doctors, therapists or anyone else simply because someone is transgender.

Upon learning of the ruling, Olin said, "This means that I can finally change my name and move forward with my life. My gender transition has been a very personal journey, and no one is in a better position to decide that I need to change my name than I am."

We were lucky to have the assistance of some incredibly talented lawyers, including Brenna DeVaney, Benjamin Edwards, Daniel Gonen, and Janson Mao, who served with us as Olin's co-counsel. Daniel admirably argued the appeal. And our friends at Debevoise & Plimpton and Lambda Legal submitted a stellar brief in support of Olin's appeal. You can read the appeal brief we submitted on Olin's behalf here.

We'd be remiss if we failed to acknowledge Olin's perseverance throughout the long appeal process. Instead of complying with a lower court requirement that we all knew was unjust (and that had been imposed upon many other people), he chose to fight it, delaying his own name change for many months to finally put an end to the practice of subjecting transgender name change applicants to this burdensome and demeaning doctor's note requirement. Thank you, Olin!

Olin changed his name through TLDEF's Name Change Project, which provides free and low-cost name changes by matching transgender community members in New York City with lawyers in private practice who provide their services free of charge. If you or someone you know needs help with a name change, please contact us.

Many months ago, when we first filed this appeal, we asked the question, "Who Decides?" Who decides what your gender identity is? Doctors, government officials, and agency administrators? Or each one of us as autonomous individuals? After many months, we're very happy to have closed the circle with a victory for freedom and self-determination.

As always, thank you for supporting our work for equal rights.

TransParentDay 2009

ftmichael — Thu, 22 Oct 2009 02:54:27 GMT

http://transparentday.org/

TransParentDay is a day to celebrate being a parent without concern of the stereotypes of gender. So whether you are MTF or FTM, this is a day for you, the parent, to be celebrated with your children.

TransParentDay is the first Sunday in November. In 2009, that is Sunday 01 November.

31 October 2009: Same-Sex Hand-Holding Saturday

ftmichael — Thu, 22 Oct 2009 01:44:30 GMT

A Day In Hand: (Same-sex hand holding) Sshh! Saturday
Saturday 31st October 2009
(Hallowe'en)

A Day In Hand announces the second ever international same-sex hand holding (Sshh!) Saturday on October 31st 2009. On this day, same-sex couples and friends all over the world are encouraged to hold hands in public to support the visibility of Lesbian, Gay, Bi, and Trans (LGBT) people. This is a revolutionary way of encouraging and inspiring LGBT people to take responsibility for their equality and live their lives without fear or restraint. David Watkins, A Day In Founder was recently recognised by Gordon Brown, UK Prime Minister, as an award winning activist in his field, with the Sheila Mckechnie Foundation http://smk.org.uk/social-inclusion-2009/

Where?

The world.

When?

The first international Same-sex hand holding (Sshh) Saturday will be Saturday October 31st.

What?

On Saturday October 31st we are asking people to find someone of the same gender, and hold their hand in public. It may be for only 1 min or for the whole day! We would love people to have their photo taken holding hands and upload it to our website by sending to yourstories@ adayinhand.com. Last months Sshh! is detailed here http://www.adayinhand.com/custompages/allcustompages/sshhworldsightingsonsshhsaturday26th

Who?

The population (gay or straight, all faiths, genders, races, abilities, single or in a relationship). Celebrities: 4 Poofs and a Piano, Brian Paddick and Boy George, author Paul Burston, MEP Michael Cashman, Mayor Boris Johnson and activists Peter Tatchell & Cleve Jones (Harvey Milk's aide) have already endorsed the A Day In Hand campaign and many more will be holding hands on the Sshh! Saturday in October.

Why?

• `Sshh! Saturday 31st October will be in memoriam of Ian Baynham, who was beaten to death in October, in a homophobia attack in Trafalgar Square, London.
• A Day In Hand founder David Watkins says, "Sshh! Saturdays aim to ultimately create safer spaces for LGBT people. The last Saturday of every month should become a day of support for LGBT people who want to show their commitment in public. Many years ago in the UK, LGBT people knew that the last carriage of every train would be populated by members of the queer community. Today, A Day In Hand wants people to feel the same sense of support in public spaces on the last Saturday of every month."
• Sshh! Saturdays are easily organised wherever you are. They are not prides or rallies. It only requires 2 people of the same sex to hold hands to make a Sshh! Saturday. The images sent to yourstories@adayinhand.com will be spread throughout the world via our website: http://adayinhand.com/ . Visibility of same-sex love is particularly important so that LGBT people become part of the cultural fabric of people's lives.
• Watkins adds "Same-sex hand holding (Sshh!) is a silent revolution for LGBT people, because nothing needs to be said: no bold speeches, no reactive arguments, no war of words. Each LGBT person has the power to change the hearts and minds of people in their local community quietly, subtly, by simply holding hands publicly and owning their space. However, hand holding is a simple powerful gesture that can happen anywhere, at any time."
• In areas of the world where it is impossible for LGBT to hold hands publicly, we call on people to send messages of support to our website on Sshh! Saturdays, and send in their photos of them holding hands, in public or private to yourstories@adayinhand.com.

You expect me to hold hands in MY area?

We're not asking people to ignore survival instincts that say "this is not safe, I shouldn't be doing this". We are asking people to think about public displays of affection in more creative, less obtrusive ways. If you can't hold hands in your immediate area, how about resting your head on your partner's shoulder at the cinema, or kissing them good-bye in the car? We have to start expressing our love in the mainstream. If you find it difficult to hold hands down your local street, find a location or area where you can hold hands comfortably, perhaps in the aisle of your supermarket or in your local park. Even for only a few minutes, the experience is liberating! So far the campaign has highlighted the positive reaction to same-sex hand holding in many major Western cities. See our recent relay walk through London http://adayinhand.com/news/greatlondonsamesexhandholdingrelay .

What is A Day In Hand?

A Day in Hand heralds a revolutionary way of making the world a more liveable place: a revolution in which anybody, on any day, can be a part of. The campaign is designed to promote equality of respect for people who wish to hold hands with someone of the same gender in public. It launched on May 17th this year and is now featured in over 20 countries worldwide. How? By holding hands we visibly challenge stereotypes and show we love and commit like everyone else. Anybody can take the day in hand. Events like Sshh! Saturdays remind people that each individual has the power to change the cultural zeitgeist. Holding hands with your partner or your friend, where you can, is about being true to yourself and to those you love.

How can I get involved? – (see contact info below) + useful links:

Website: http://adayinhand.com (PLEASE REGISTER WITH OUR WEBSITE)
Facebook: http://facebook.com/group.php?gid=44558452324
Twitter: http://twitter.com/adayinhand

Send your public same-sex hand holding photos with a description to yourstories@adayinhand.com

Contact:
David Watkins (A Day In Hand founder): info@adayinhand.com
Available for A Day In Hand interviews & feature writing. +44 (0) 7931 461810

65-question survey

ftmichael — Mon, 12 Oct 2009 22:15:50 GMT

Stolen from ganimede.

1. First thing you wash in the shower?
My chest.

2. What colour is your favourite hoodie?
I have two - navy and grey.

3. Would you kiss the last person you kissed again?
Certainly. He's cute.

4. Do you plan outfits?
Rarely.

5. How are you feeling RIGHT now?
Cold! I've been chugging tea all day, but I don't want to close my window because it gets stuffy.

6. What's the closest thing to you that's red?
Nathaniel's Red Sox backpack on the floor, a foot or so away.

7. Tell me about the last dream you remember having.
I rarely remember my dreams these days, so nothing comes to mind.

8. Did you meet anybody new today?
Nope! I've been hanging out at home all day, talking online to people I've talked to before.

9. What are you craving right now?
Warmth. Give me a little bit and I'll be craving food.

10. Do you floss?
Rarely.

11. What comes to mind when I say cabbage?
Erm - the vegetable?

12. Are you emotional?
On occasion, but not very.

13. Have you ever counted to 1,000?
Not that I can remember.

14. Do you bite into your ice cream or just lick it?
Lick. I have sensitive teeth and it really hurts if I bite ice cream.

15. Do you like your hair?
Yep.

16. Do you like yourself?
Yep, and that's a big deal, so I'm very pleased about it and try not to take it for granted.

17. Would you go out to eat with George W. Bush?
Hell no.

18. What are you listening to right now?
Geoff Lloyd's Hometime Show - Thu 8th Oct 2009 - Absolute Radio Podcast, according to audacious.

19. Are your parents strict?
Not these days.

20. Would you go sky diving?
Definitely not.

21. Do you like cottage cheese?
Not at all.

22. Have you ever met a celebrity?
Yep! I met Eddie Izzard in 2003, shortly before my top surgery, and offered him my breasts. He laughed and thanked me, but declined.

23. Do you rent movies often?
Never.

24. Is there anything sparkly in the room you're in?
Nope. I don't tend to do sparkly.

25. How many countries have you visited?
If you count countries where I never left the airport? Four (England, France, the Netherlands, and various places in the US). If you don't? Two (England and various places in the US).

26. Have you made a prank phone call?
Nope, nor would I.

27. Ever been on a train?
Yep, but not a long-distance trip like on Amtrak.

28. Brown or white eggs?
Don't really care. I've never noticed a difference in the taste.

29. Do you have a cell phone?
Yep! I just got a new one, actually: a Samsung T239.

30. Do you use chapstick?
Yep!

31. Do you own a gun?
No, nor would I. I hate guns because they only do damage; they don't fix or improve anything.

32. Can you use chopsticks?
Barely.

33. Who are you going to be with tonight?
Nathaniel! We're having a night in and making sausage cacciatore. You're jealous.

34. Are you too forgiving?
Some would say I am.

35. Ever been in love?
Yep, a few times.

36. What is your best friend(s) doing tomorrow?
Hanging out with me! We don't have plans yet though, so I'm not sure what we'll wind up doing.

37. Ever have cream puffs?
I think I tried one once. Wasn't really my thing.

38. Last time you cried?
Can't remember offhand.

39. What was the last question you asked?
'Would you like a cup of tea?'

40. Favourite time of the year?
Spring - April or May, when it's warm but the warmth is still a novelty, and everything's starting to bloom again. Maybe more May, as we get a lot of cold rain in April.

41. Do you have any tattoos?
Yep, I have two.

42. Are you sarcastic?
Me? Never.

43. Have you ever seen The Butterfly Effect?
Nope.

44. Ever walked into a wall?
Not full in the face, but I've accidentally bumped a shoulder into the wall while turning a corner, any number of times.

45. Favourite colour?
Blue! Particularly dark blue. I also like dark green and dark red. Bright colours and pastels really aren't my thing.

46. Have you ever slapped someone?
Just on one occasion, when I was under strict orders to keep someone awake and nothing else was working. (Obviously I didn't slap them hard, but I reckon it still counts as a slap.)

47. Is your hair curly?
Nope, but it gets a bit wavy at the ends if I grow it out a little.

48. What was the last CD you bought?
The Fishing with Finnegan CD. They're a local sibling group from Rhode Island and they play folk music. I highly recommend them if you like any kind of folk - they play mainly Irish and American stuff, I think.

49. Do looks matter?
They shouldn't, but unfortunately they often do.

50. Could you ever forgive a cheater?
Quite possibly.

51. Is your phone bill sky high?
Nope, but of course I wish it were lower.

52. Do you like your life right now?
For the most part, yeah, I really do. Knock wood.

53. Do you sleep with the TV on?
No, I need it quiet to sleep.

54. Can you handle the truth?
Of course; I don't spontaneously combust when presented with a truth. A better question would be whether I can handle it well - and that depends on the truth.

55. Do you have good vision?
Yep, but not perfect. I need reading/computer glasses as I'm a bit farsighted.

56. Do you hate or dislike more than 3 people?
Dislike? Most definitely. Hate? I don't think so.

57. How often do you talk on the phone?
Rarely. I hate talking on the phone. I will send a million texts before I'll make a phone call. The unlimited-texts package on my phone plan is well worth its cost.

58. The last person you held hands with?
Nathaniel, yesterday when we were walking around Harvard Square.

59. What are you wearing?
Flannel boxers, jeans, T-shirt, hoodie, and socks. And I'm still cold!

60. What is your favourite animal?
The grey wolf, without a doubt.

61. Where was your default picture taken?
Old Sturbridge Village, in June of 2008, by Nathaniel.

62. Can you hula hoop?
Barely.

63. Do you have a job?
I have two! One mostly involves driving, while the other mostly involves hanging out and occasionally involves driving. Both involve being a role model for three fantastic young guys.

64. What was the most recent thing you bought?
Does food count? I went to Dunkin Donuts yesterday, as is Nathaniel's and my custom on Sundays.

65. Have you ever crawled through a window?
Once, when I was kitten-sitting and accidentally locked myself out of the house, and had to enlist the help of my uncle and cousins to find a way in. I got in through a basement window.