AHEM>>>more about me...

TEN random things about me:

1) I am deathly afraid of frogs.....i didn't know that until my brother bought one home and I had a panic attack.

2) I am (and can be) a very anxious person and therefore, sometimes, need to be reassured or comforted....I also jump to conclusions....Let's face it; it is the only excercise I get.

3) I used to resent both of my parents when I was younger because my mother worked all the time and I was always in after school care or vacation care and  my father was a very unreliable person....so I used to see him when it suited him....Not such a big deal now, but to an 8 year old...

4) I love doing things for shock value. My dad asked me why I keep doing things like that and I told him I'd rather people laugh at me or say things because of something I'm wearing or whatever as opposed to them laughing and saying things about who I am.

5) I find it very hard to trust people....sometimes even my family and friends...That kinda goes with the anxiety and paranoia though.

6) Whenever I hate myself or my body, or if I believe I've done something wrong, I shave my head. It gives me one less thing to have pride over.

7) I can be a very contrary person...That is...I often do things just to piss people off. It's somehting I'm trying to stop..."Don't walk through a minefield if you know your legs are going to get blown off".

8) I wish I was a Dom....If anyone's giving lessons, let me know.

9) I believe that I am imperfect and that there is perfection in others.

10) I prefer brunettes.....or, if there are no brunettes, lol, then red heads.

NINE places I've visited:

9) North America

8) Japan

7) Canberra

6) My dreams

5) Too many hospitals

4) Smuggler's Cove caravan park in Forster, NSW

3) Many places in Sydney, my favourites being Newtown and Glebe.

2) Cyberspace

1) An aeroplane

EIGHT things I want to do before I die:

8) Meet some of the people on live journal especially leatherboy  because I see him as a kind of mentor.

7) Get married. Happily. Easily. And legally in Australia.

6) Have kids

5) Get a Boxer dog

4) Own a piece of art

3) Write a book of short stories

2) get to know my family better

1) Go to San Fransisco again. Awesome place.

SEVEN ways to win my heart:

7) 3 words...love song dedications, lol

6) Tell me how you feel about me

5) Love me no matter what dumbass things I do

4) Accept and respect the things I am and am not

3) Not just know me, but understand me

2) Don't ever lie to me or cheat on me...one more chance one more chance

1) Be there for me when I need you and let me be there for you. Hug me if you want affection and let me close enough to hug you if I need to...Despite the fact you may not want a hug. Be nice to me...I like roughness too, but I need to be loved, held and looked after.

SIX things I believe in:

6) Good writing can take you to places that no piece of music, no movie and no artwork can take you. I respect any kind of prose if it can make me feel something.

5) What comes around goes around...I know that this means that I have a lot of bad Karma heading my way, but I believe it just the same.

4) Every action has an equal and opposite reaction

3) Kind laughter- laughing with some one is definately a cure for many many things.

2) Time heals all wounds...Not quickly, lol, but it works.

1) I do believe in love. I never used to, but I do now.

FIVE things I'm afraid of:

5) When I'm not in control of my mind and/or body

4) When someone I'm supposed to trust does something wrong by me

3) Anger...Not always other people's anger, either.

2) Deep water

1) My paranoia

FOUR of my favourite items in my bedroom:

4) My "books of me"...portable pieces of me....

3) My meditation balls...

2) My cd player and cds

1) My room itself...Dude, the only place I can say "come in if you're ugly" or something. It's just my space.

THREE things I do everyday:

3) Write...whether it be a jounal entry or some kind of shitty prose, lol

2) Look at myself in the mirror (or any reflective surface) and wish I was someone else.

1) Hope that I can get out of bed and feel ok that day.

TWO things I'm avoiding:

2) Taking my night time medication

1) Being an asshole to my girlfriend again

ONE person I want to see right now:

1) Only one?

NUMBER:

Of times I have been in love: 1

Of times I've had my heart broken: A few

Of people I could trust with my life: I'll get back to you

Of times my name has appeared in the newspaper: None, thank god

Of scars on my body: Hundreds

Of things in my past that I regret: None