Believe it or not...

I'm not actually dead.

Life has been interesting lately...Started this DBT therapy group and have a new individual therapist (who I'm not sure I like), so that's been keeping me busy. The group is at a nearby (mental) hospital that deals with both in- and outpatients, which is, mercifully, within walking distance of my house, so I'm not going to complain about that too much. This lovely fun stuff happens on Tuesdays, 9:30-2:30, and then I trek out to Bondi (yes, home of the famous beach) to see this inordinately expensive woman ($220 per hour!). She's really not bad at all when it comes to her practice -- clearly she knows what she's doing and she comes very highly recommended -- but she looks uncannily like my ex-stepmother and that really throws me. I mean, the woman was a nut...Still is...and unabashedly so, so seeing someone who looks remarkably like her in a therapeutic context is more than a little unsettling.

As for the situation with my meds, my Psychiatrist and I are both comfortable with how things are going so far. No horrible side-effects (aside from tremours and the driest dry-mouth ever), so I'm not unhappy with that, and the moodstabilisers are doing just fine, so I can't complain about that either. It's a nice change, I must admit, to not be horribly suicidal or wishing to do terrible damage to myself. I'd forgotten what a little bit of stability is like...It also made me acutely aware of how bad things have been and for how long. I'm not sure when the last time I've felt like this was. I mean, don't get me wrong, things aren't perfect and I'm not about to pretend that they are, but things are settling down and I have the room to be a lot more objective when it comes to my moods and behaviours. I'm much more firmly in the driver's seat here. Most pleased.

I'm on break from uni which ends July 30th. Fortunately my classes don't start until the 1st, so I have a little time beforehand to get my book together. My classes this semester fall mostly on one day, Wednesday, which is cool, since I don't have to do much running around the place. Originally I was in the Wednesday DBT group because it clashed with last semester's timetable, but I asked if I could be moved to the Tuesday group to avoid clashing with classes for this semester. I was surprised at how easy it was and how easy-going the people who run the program are...They just slotted me right in with no problem at all. There was a vacancy in that group for that day, so it all worked in my favour. So, aside from doing these various and sundry therapy-type things, I really haven't been up to much. Lots of staying in bed until 2pm, not a lot of set routine lately, which is making me a bit stir crazy. Today, for example, I went to my appointment in Bondi and got home to be greeted by an empty house...I knew that sitting around doing more of nothing would make me a little nuts, so I -- and no one is more shocked than I am -- did a load of washing, dealt with the dishwasher, put the rubbish out and cleaned my room. And I mean, really cleaned it...My desk actually looks like a desk, now, rather than a precariously piled book mountain topped with my Mac. It has a flat surface and everything. Had to Tetris some of my books onto my shelves (definitely out of shelf space now), but all in all, not too shabby. Must say, though, it's a weird feeling to be sitting at a desk...I'm also aware of how strange that feeling is...Heaps of people sit at desks all the time and do so with very little to do...

There's really not much else that requires a mention at this point. My life is fairly unremarkable...Even I find me boring.

I trust you are all well xx