Wow.
So, it's almost time.
Another year over and I haven't really achieved all that much. I'm not at a NYE party. I'm not with anyone. You know what? It doesn't bother me.
I've done stuff this year. I've met people this year. I've made friends this year - ones I'll never forget. I've made decisions this year and I've been strong and brave.
I've learned a lot. About myself. Like I know I love to feel conflicted because it's what fuels me. I know for sure that I want to write....I know I could do that for the rest of my life and die happy. I know I can do things, that even though I get nervous, I can do what I want. I know I'm a force to be reckoned with. I know I'm a little bit arrogant and I know that I don't give a toss.
I've learned that I do in fact have a patience bone, but because I'm a brat, I can't stand delayed gratification. I want what I want and I want it now. And heaven help you if I don't get my way. I've learned to shut up and think about things a little more. I've begun to learn not to be so constrained by what other people expect from me....Beacuse I'm a contrary little motherfucker, I won't give you what you expect, so you may as well give it up. I've reaffirmed within myself that I'm greedy, not always fair and selfish. I've decided very thoroughly that I don't care.
But conversely, I've learned that I can be understanding and funny and warm. I've also learned (again) that I don't need someone else in my life to make me happy.
So, onward to 2008. I have no idea what to expect, but perhaps I won't have expectations. Perhaps I'll make more decisions. I should, because I have a goal for 2009. I need to find some work. I need to work on getting my license. I need to work on being more independant...I mean, domestically independant, lol.
I hope everyone out there has a great new year. Good luck, guys.
Another year over and I haven't really achieved all that much. I'm not at a NYE party. I'm not with anyone. You know what? It doesn't bother me.
I've done stuff this year. I've met people this year. I've made friends this year - ones I'll never forget. I've made decisions this year and I've been strong and brave.
I've learned a lot. About myself. Like I know I love to feel conflicted because it's what fuels me. I know for sure that I want to write....I know I could do that for the rest of my life and die happy. I know I can do things, that even though I get nervous, I can do what I want. I know I'm a force to be reckoned with. I know I'm a little bit arrogant and I know that I don't give a toss.
I've learned that I do in fact have a patience bone, but because I'm a brat, I can't stand delayed gratification. I want what I want and I want it now. And heaven help you if I don't get my way. I've learned to shut up and think about things a little more. I've begun to learn not to be so constrained by what other people expect from me....Beacuse I'm a contrary little motherfucker, I won't give you what you expect, so you may as well give it up. I've reaffirmed within myself that I'm greedy, not always fair and selfish. I've decided very thoroughly that I don't care.
But conversely, I've learned that I can be understanding and funny and warm. I've also learned (again) that I don't need someone else in my life to make me happy.
So, onward to 2008. I have no idea what to expect, but perhaps I won't have expectations. Perhaps I'll make more decisions. I should, because I have a goal for 2009. I need to find some work. I need to work on getting my license. I need to work on being more independant...I mean, domestically independant, lol.
I hope everyone out there has a great new year. Good luck, guys.