Challenge 10: "So Sue Me"
Title: So Sue Me
Game: Rekka no Ken / Fire Emblem 7
Word Count: 1,728
Pairings/Characters: Lyn, Self-insert
Warnings: Failed attempt at shoujo-ai, Mary Sue, self-insert, Taking This Too Literally, some language
Not your average suefic, I guess? First time entering; I started late and didn't have time to finish, so I'm entering the first chapter as a oneshot if everyone's cool with that. I'll probably do more on it later, but for now... haha I'm running out of time! XD
I've never been very good at this whole Sue thing. See, I was born into it. Half-Sue on my mother's side. I didn't even get a choice; I was off to the Academy as soon as I came of age, to learn the proper way to Perfect the Canons of the World.
I wasn't even very good in my classes. I barely passed them. It wasn't for lack of trying-- I wanted to do my family proud-- I just... didn't get everything. Didn't understand the point to it. Personality rewriting, Romancing the mains, finding the limelight, none of it.
I was a terrible student. Never really made friends, got picked last for kickball, the whole nine yards.
I was never a tragically beautiful, abused little angel or a kidnapped princess or the illegitimate child of someone famous. I was that slow kid who sat in the back of class and always gave the wrong answers when the teacher called on her.
I dreaded finals, but I still busted my ass studying for them. I learned the world, the characters, the canon, everything I could learn about my chosen dimension.
Elibe.
I was headed to Elibe.
When the day came, I was issued my P.A.N.D.A. (Pandimensional Atomic Naturalization Disguise Apparatus) for the first time. The feel of the black-and-white plastic in my hand seemed almost unreal. It fit in my hand, but felt so much heavier than it looked.
I held my breath and warped to my exam location. Sacae, to start. The plains. I stood there in my jeans and tee and looked around at the prairie grass undulating in the wind. Already I felt a pang of regret that I'd chosen somewhere so beautiful to twist.
After I checked my coordinates on the PANDA's screen, I initiated Naturalization Mode. I didn't have a mirror, but I knew what I would look like. Wavy, dirty-blond hair became short and mousy brown; blue eyes turned green. A tee and jeans became a tunic and trousers, sneakers changing into traveling boots and a forest green hooded cloak unfurling to flap unhindered in the wind.
Kitty the shoddy excuse for a Sue became Kitty the fledgling tactician.
I could do this. Step one was easy: I had to get involved with the characters. There's where my coordinates came in: I was to be discovered by Lyn in that exact spot, "passed out" on the plains.
It got a little convoluted from there. The only numbered step was... step one.
I remembered something about it being important to get started romancing your love interest As Soon As Possible. And something about the best love interest being a main character...
Well.
Might as well get to work.
Initiate Phase One
I pressed a button on the PANDA and a countdown started.
FIVE--
I stuffed the device in a voluminous pocket.
FOUR--
Looked around for a relatively soft spot. Found none.
THREE--
Began second-guessing myself.
TWO--
I am so going to fail.
ONE--
Blackness. The heavy thud of my own body hitting the ground, distant and detached like it wasn't me falling there. Then, nothing.
I expected to be in Lyn's ger when I woke up. I did not, however, expect the pounding headache that was drumming at my temples. I slitted my eyes open and shut them immediately, groaning at the intrusion of light.
"You're awake," a voice came lancing into my consciousness. Had my head not been killing me, I would have been better able to appreciate the clear, strong female voice. However, at the moment, she was little more than noise. I tried to stay still and quiet, pretend I was still asleep, hoping that she ignored me. The bed, at least, was warm and comfortable; that surprised me. I was expecting a scratchy straw mattress.
"I found you on the plains," she began, like she wasn't buying my act. I could hear her coming closer, felt her bending over me slightly to inspect me. "You can open your eyes now, friend, I won't bite."
Damn.
"Light hurts. Feel hung over," I mumbled. I didn't want to talk. Talking meant sound.
I was never using that particular feature of the PANDA ever again.
A soft ahh sound came from Lyn, and her next words were quieter.
"Is that why I found you unconscious, then?"
"...no." I said after a few moments and slitted my eyes open. "Fever, I think."
That was what I'd decided my excuse would be. Illness. I felt a hand press to my forehead.
"You don't feel feverish," came Lyn's voice. It didn't sound judgmental, at least, just a statement of fact. She almost sounded relieved, in fact, that I wasn't carrying anything contagious.
Well, damn.
I reminded myself to think my excuses through better next time. If there was a next time. If I ever passed my final.
"...guess not, then," I mumbled. "Dunno." A long pause as I tried to think of another excuse, then: "Maybe I ate something wrong. 've never been that great of an outdoorsman."
My eyes slitted open to see a muzzy face hovering inches from mine. Focusing hurt my head more, but I could make out dark green eyes and what looked like a worried expression on her face.
"Did you eat any mushrooms?" she asked.
"Hate mushrooms," was my mumbled reply.
"Perhaps a sick animal?"
"Can't hunt to save m'life."
"You're a traveler," she continued, "How can you eat on the road if you are unable to hunt?"
"...very good luck?" I squeaked. My cover was already starting to fall apart. I was never going to pass. I was never going to graduate. I could practically hear my future clattering down around my ears-- and believe me, with a headache like I had, it wasn't a pleasant experience.
I had to save myself.
"'m a strategist. Tactician in training," I continued, thinking as fast as I could with the thumping in my brain. "I buy my food. Used to have a pony, but he got spooked and took off with most of my supplies and money."
"Oh..." she said softly. I could see her nodding.
"Yeah. Kinda sucks."
"Excuse me?" She asked, confused. I closed my eyes. Right, keep the modern slang out of my speech. I'd blow my cover.
"...it's kinda a bad situation to be in."
"Indeed it is," Lyn said, still nodding. I wished she'd stop it; she was starting to make me dizzy watching her.
After that, though, she stilled her movements and her voice and there was sweet, sweet silence for a few long moments. It gave me a chance to think.
Begin the romance ASAP. That's right. I had to--
My main character was a girl. There hadn't been anything in the manual about that--
Well.
I guess it was this test's version of a trick question. I was going to go by the rules, play it straight-- or not so straight, as the case may be...
I kissed her.
On the lips.
She was already close, so it was just a matter of lifting up off the bed a bit and capturing her lips in mine. They were chapped. I wish I could say I thought she tasted like something poetic, like freedom or independence or even the wind. She just tasted... like every other person I'd ever kissed. A little spit, a little bitterness, a hint of whatever the last thing she'd eaten was.
And then, in an instant, it was over and she was stumbling back, her fingers pressed against her lips.
"What...?" she asked, obviously confused and surprised.
I fell back onto the bed, shut my eyes, and wanted to die. Wanted very badly to die. I didn't even have an excuse--
Wait.
"Thought you were a hallucination." I said softly. "Sorry."
My head was still spinning from the rapid movements, but at least now it seemed like the headache was lessening a bit. I hadn't expected side effects from the PANDA and, quite frankly, it sucked.
"I..." she started. Then, "You must be from far away," she said plainly, "To have such strange customs. We Sacaens would have merely laid a hand on the apparition."
I could feel my cheeks growing hot.
"Not thinking clearly," I mumbled. "Just... c'n I get some sleep?" I asked, trying to make my voice sound as pitiful as possible. "I know I'll be better afterwards..."
"May I have your name, first, traveler?"
"Kitty," I murmured. "Yours?"
I already knew her name, of course. But admitting that to her would have just been freaky.
"Lyn," she said with an open smile. "Lyn of the Lorca tribe. Kitty is... such a strange name for a person. A nickname, perhaps?"
"Yeah," I murmured, closing my eyes. "Name's really Katherine. Definitely like Kitty better. Beats, like, Raven or something else dark and mysterious, at least."
"I... don't believe I understand..." her voice did, in fact, sound confused.
"Long story," I murmured. "'ll 'splain later."
"Sleep well, Kitty," was the last thing I heard before I drifted off.
I awoke to the sounds of shouting outside the ger. Normally I sleep like the dead, but Lyn was pacing about nervously, the sound of her movement helping to wake me as well. I slitted my eyes open and was relieved to find that the light no longer made me want to curl up and die.
"Something wrong?" I asked, sitting up. For the first time I realized I was in nothing more than my underthings and blushed, bringing the blanket up to cover me.
Lyn stopped and crossed her arms, bringing her hand up to where she could chew on her thumb nervously.
"Bandits," she said simply. "I need to stop them before they get to the nearest village, but... I'm just one person." She paused. "Perhaps you could... help... somehow?" she looked at me pleadingly and I wanted badly to help her, but-- my Sue powers, my Sue strength, had no place in this world.
I could take the bandits out easily, but that was the biggest problem I had in my classes. I didn't want my own story. I just wanted to help someone else with theirs.
Did passing the test mean defeating these bandits, or directing Lyn to do so?
...goddamn trick questions. Goddamn my professors.
Couldn't this Sue thing be easy?
Game: Rekka no Ken / Fire Emblem 7
Word Count: 1,728
Pairings/Characters: Lyn, Self-insert
Warnings: Failed attempt at shoujo-ai, Mary Sue, self-insert, Taking This Too Literally, some language
Not your average suefic, I guess? First time entering; I started late and didn't have time to finish, so I'm entering the first chapter as a oneshot if everyone's cool with that. I'll probably do more on it later, but for now... haha I'm running out of time! XD
I've never been very good at this whole Sue thing. See, I was born into it. Half-Sue on my mother's side. I didn't even get a choice; I was off to the Academy as soon as I came of age, to learn the proper way to Perfect the Canons of the World.
I wasn't even very good in my classes. I barely passed them. It wasn't for lack of trying-- I wanted to do my family proud-- I just... didn't get everything. Didn't understand the point to it. Personality rewriting, Romancing the mains, finding the limelight, none of it.
I was a terrible student. Never really made friends, got picked last for kickball, the whole nine yards.
I was never a tragically beautiful, abused little angel or a kidnapped princess or the illegitimate child of someone famous. I was that slow kid who sat in the back of class and always gave the wrong answers when the teacher called on her.
I dreaded finals, but I still busted my ass studying for them. I learned the world, the characters, the canon, everything I could learn about my chosen dimension.
Elibe.
I was headed to Elibe.
When the day came, I was issued my P.A.N.D.A. (Pandimensional Atomic Naturalization Disguise Apparatus) for the first time. The feel of the black-and-white plastic in my hand seemed almost unreal. It fit in my hand, but felt so much heavier than it looked.
I held my breath and warped to my exam location. Sacae, to start. The plains. I stood there in my jeans and tee and looked around at the prairie grass undulating in the wind. Already I felt a pang of regret that I'd chosen somewhere so beautiful to twist.
After I checked my coordinates on the PANDA's screen, I initiated Naturalization Mode. I didn't have a mirror, but I knew what I would look like. Wavy, dirty-blond hair became short and mousy brown; blue eyes turned green. A tee and jeans became a tunic and trousers, sneakers changing into traveling boots and a forest green hooded cloak unfurling to flap unhindered in the wind.
Kitty the shoddy excuse for a Sue became Kitty the fledgling tactician.
I could do this. Step one was easy: I had to get involved with the characters. There's where my coordinates came in: I was to be discovered by Lyn in that exact spot, "passed out" on the plains.
It got a little convoluted from there. The only numbered step was... step one.
I remembered something about it being important to get started romancing your love interest As Soon As Possible. And something about the best love interest being a main character...
Well.
Might as well get to work.
Initiate Phase One
I pressed a button on the PANDA and a countdown started.
FIVE--
I stuffed the device in a voluminous pocket.
FOUR--
Looked around for a relatively soft spot. Found none.
THREE--
Began second-guessing myself.
TWO--
I am so going to fail.
ONE--
Blackness. The heavy thud of my own body hitting the ground, distant and detached like it wasn't me falling there. Then, nothing.
I expected to be in Lyn's ger when I woke up. I did not, however, expect the pounding headache that was drumming at my temples. I slitted my eyes open and shut them immediately, groaning at the intrusion of light.
"You're awake," a voice came lancing into my consciousness. Had my head not been killing me, I would have been better able to appreciate the clear, strong female voice. However, at the moment, she was little more than noise. I tried to stay still and quiet, pretend I was still asleep, hoping that she ignored me. The bed, at least, was warm and comfortable; that surprised me. I was expecting a scratchy straw mattress.
"I found you on the plains," she began, like she wasn't buying my act. I could hear her coming closer, felt her bending over me slightly to inspect me. "You can open your eyes now, friend, I won't bite."
Damn.
"Light hurts. Feel hung over," I mumbled. I didn't want to talk. Talking meant sound.
I was never using that particular feature of the PANDA ever again.
A soft ahh sound came from Lyn, and her next words were quieter.
"Is that why I found you unconscious, then?"
"...no." I said after a few moments and slitted my eyes open. "Fever, I think."
That was what I'd decided my excuse would be. Illness. I felt a hand press to my forehead.
"You don't feel feverish," came Lyn's voice. It didn't sound judgmental, at least, just a statement of fact. She almost sounded relieved, in fact, that I wasn't carrying anything contagious.
Well, damn.
I reminded myself to think my excuses through better next time. If there was a next time. If I ever passed my final.
"...guess not, then," I mumbled. "Dunno." A long pause as I tried to think of another excuse, then: "Maybe I ate something wrong. 've never been that great of an outdoorsman."
My eyes slitted open to see a muzzy face hovering inches from mine. Focusing hurt my head more, but I could make out dark green eyes and what looked like a worried expression on her face.
"Did you eat any mushrooms?" she asked.
"Hate mushrooms," was my mumbled reply.
"Perhaps a sick animal?"
"Can't hunt to save m'life."
"You're a traveler," she continued, "How can you eat on the road if you are unable to hunt?"
"...very good luck?" I squeaked. My cover was already starting to fall apart. I was never going to pass. I was never going to graduate. I could practically hear my future clattering down around my ears-- and believe me, with a headache like I had, it wasn't a pleasant experience.
I had to save myself.
"'m a strategist. Tactician in training," I continued, thinking as fast as I could with the thumping in my brain. "I buy my food. Used to have a pony, but he got spooked and took off with most of my supplies and money."
"Oh..." she said softly. I could see her nodding.
"Yeah. Kinda sucks."
"Excuse me?" She asked, confused. I closed my eyes. Right, keep the modern slang out of my speech. I'd blow my cover.
"...it's kinda a bad situation to be in."
"Indeed it is," Lyn said, still nodding. I wished she'd stop it; she was starting to make me dizzy watching her.
After that, though, she stilled her movements and her voice and there was sweet, sweet silence for a few long moments. It gave me a chance to think.
Begin the romance ASAP. That's right. I had to--
My main character was a girl. There hadn't been anything in the manual about that--
Well.
I guess it was this test's version of a trick question. I was going to go by the rules, play it straight-- or not so straight, as the case may be...
I kissed her.
On the lips.
She was already close, so it was just a matter of lifting up off the bed a bit and capturing her lips in mine. They were chapped. I wish I could say I thought she tasted like something poetic, like freedom or independence or even the wind. She just tasted... like every other person I'd ever kissed. A little spit, a little bitterness, a hint of whatever the last thing she'd eaten was.
And then, in an instant, it was over and she was stumbling back, her fingers pressed against her lips.
"What...?" she asked, obviously confused and surprised.
I fell back onto the bed, shut my eyes, and wanted to die. Wanted very badly to die. I didn't even have an excuse--
Wait.
"Thought you were a hallucination." I said softly. "Sorry."
My head was still spinning from the rapid movements, but at least now it seemed like the headache was lessening a bit. I hadn't expected side effects from the PANDA and, quite frankly, it sucked.
"I..." she started. Then, "You must be from far away," she said plainly, "To have such strange customs. We Sacaens would have merely laid a hand on the apparition."
I could feel my cheeks growing hot.
"Not thinking clearly," I mumbled. "Just... c'n I get some sleep?" I asked, trying to make my voice sound as pitiful as possible. "I know I'll be better afterwards..."
"May I have your name, first, traveler?"
"Kitty," I murmured. "Yours?"
I already knew her name, of course. But admitting that to her would have just been freaky.
"Lyn," she said with an open smile. "Lyn of the Lorca tribe. Kitty is... such a strange name for a person. A nickname, perhaps?"
"Yeah," I murmured, closing my eyes. "Name's really Katherine. Definitely like Kitty better. Beats, like, Raven or something else dark and mysterious, at least."
"I... don't believe I understand..." her voice did, in fact, sound confused.
"Long story," I murmured. "'ll 'splain later."
"Sleep well, Kitty," was the last thing I heard before I drifted off.
I awoke to the sounds of shouting outside the ger. Normally I sleep like the dead, but Lyn was pacing about nervously, the sound of her movement helping to wake me as well. I slitted my eyes open and was relieved to find that the light no longer made me want to curl up and die.
"Something wrong?" I asked, sitting up. For the first time I realized I was in nothing more than my underthings and blushed, bringing the blanket up to cover me.
Lyn stopped and crossed her arms, bringing her hand up to where she could chew on her thumb nervously.
"Bandits," she said simply. "I need to stop them before they get to the nearest village, but... I'm just one person." She paused. "Perhaps you could... help... somehow?" she looked at me pleadingly and I wanted badly to help her, but-- my Sue powers, my Sue strength, had no place in this world.
I could take the bandits out easily, but that was the biggest problem I had in my classes. I didn't want my own story. I just wanted to help someone else with theirs.
Did passing the test mean defeating these bandits, or directing Lyn to do so?
...goddamn trick questions. Goddamn my professors.
Couldn't this Sue thing be easy?