Pundits and podcasters – Scott Galloway among them – can provoke clicks by insisting that real men have no business caring for babies. After all, it’s only natural that breastmilk-producing moms should be the ones caring for them. Yet more and more men in the U.S. and around the world are opting to be present in the delivery room, luxuriating in intimate contact with newborns after birth, and engaging in hands-on care. In the process, men do more than just discover that they are good at caring and possess a quantum of tenderness. They also learn that infant care not only benefits children, mothers, and society at large, but also caring men themselves. Having monitored and studied fathers, fatherhood, and the evolution of fatherhood over decades, the two of us would like to contribute some positive news to the conversation.

First off, for men who want to become important figures in their child’s life, it helps to be recognized as familiar and trustworthy right from the get-go. Developmental neuroscientists like Tobias Grossmann at the University of Virginia are learning that within the first months of life, a human baby’s medial prefrontal cortex is at work, registering facial expressions, utterances, and voice tones, already beginning to distinguish who is responsive and who is not. Research by developmental psychologists like Kiley Hamlin at the University of British Columbia reveals that well before six months, babies discriminate who nearby is helpful, who is not. But since babies have no paternity-determining built-in DNA lab, they cannot know who their father is. Rather, as developmental psychologists like Ashley Thomas at Harvard are learning, the people recognized as “family” are those the baby has become familiar with and learned to trust.

A father who suddenly shows up at age two or three does not have — from his baby’s perspective — the same emotional resonance as a father responsive to the baby’s needs right from birth. Relationships take time, and the sooner begun, the more readily bonds develop. Far from a waste of time, a man caring for his baby makes an enduring investment in the quality and durability of their future relationship.

For mothers, when the presence of a caring partner during pre-natal visits and in birthing places is welcome and wanted, it can leave them feeling more supported and more likely to receive the care they need and deserve. According to Equimundo, millions of couples report a closer connection when male partners are present during birth. Yet, from our own research and life experience, we are all too aware that globally, men do less hands-on infant and childcare than women. That gap turns out to be a key factor in women’s lower income and constrained workforce participation compared to men’s.

But remedies are not merely a matter of gender justice. Data from Nordic countries, which have long encouraged paternal presence at delivery, along with dozens of other countries that have adopted the practice more recently, reveal that this policy both promotes equality in the home and also enhances father-infant bonding. Encouraging early contact between men and babies from day one promotes contacts on day two, and a man’s increasing confidence in his ability to care, greater trust in him by the infant cared for, leading to a cascade of benefits for all concerned.

It’s time to set aside old tropes about infant care being emasculating, or somehow unnatural for men, when so many participating in caretaking find tremendous satisfaction and meaning in doing so. In surveys undertaken worldwide, men describe fatherhood as one of their main sources of purpose and wellbeing. Other data show that men who have close relationships with their children from early childhood and beyond have better mental health, lower rates of substance abuse, and lower rates of incarceration. While we often focus on what men mean in the lives of children and their partners, men who embrace caretaking gain immensely as well.

Consider the health benefits. Across the mammalian world, males typically die before females do (the exceptions tend to be the rare species where males do a lot of care!). In the U.S., women on average live five years longer than men. Almost certainly, higher testosterone is a factor, rendering men more prone to risk-taking and violence, as well as interfering with some immune functions. Fortunately for committed fathers, testosterone declines in men spending time with babies. Levels of oxytocin, a hormone important in forming affiliative bonds, tend to go up in men in prolonged intimate contact with babies, and these surges may be accompanied by reduced inflammation and increased healing (Horn and Carter). Then there are the psychological benefits. As recently noted by former U.S. surgeon general Vivek Murthy, feeling lonely, unneeded, or unwanted is bad for psychological well-being. Well, what more powerful antidote than feeling oneself needed by a baby, a baby likely to repay you with smiles of glee and adoration? At a time when three out of five so-called “deaths of despair” are from drug overdoses and suicides in U.S. men, what better way for a man to be reminded how much he matters than caring for someone? It also seems possible that stimulation of dopamine-related reward centers in the brains of men interacting with babies might just render them less susceptible to other forms of addiction from drugs and alcohol.

Finally, there are the benefits to the economy and society at large. As job markets shift and industrial jobs give way to service industry jobs, as AI upends many professions with insecurity becoming the new norm, flexibility at home and work is how parents will survive and still thrive. Countries that offer nationally supported paid leave for all parents – along with subsidized childcare and encouraging flexible work arrangements – will fare better. Along with “technological literacy”, the 2025 World Economic Report on “Jobs of the Future” lists “strong interpersonal ability, emotional intelligence, and a commitment to balancing hard and soft skills” as among the top traits companies will be seeking – just the sort of skills those caring for children are likely to develop.

As for the economic viability of providing paid care on a national scale, we need only look at the economic output and productivity of countries where men’s caregiving is most prevalent: Western Europe, Canada, Australia, and Scandinavia. All have some of the highest rates of productivity as well as workforce contentment. A review of care policies from around the world, developed by the International Labour Office, finds that among all care policies – including paid parental leave and subsidized childcare – the return on investment is consistently around three to one. That means every dollar invested in care policies, including paid parental leave, yields about $3 in benefits.

Yes, caring for babies is exhausting, sleep-depriving, and can be tedious. This is why men who care need support and validation every bit as much as mothers do. Yet as men caring for children becomes more common, it also turns out to be highly adaptable, often essential, in economies where most households need two or more working adults to get by. As for those worried about how women working contributes to falling birthrates, it’s worth heeding the admonition of economist Claudia Goldin in her 2023 Nobel Prize acceptance speech, where she notes that “the last chapter … in the gender gap saga cannot be written until couples share more, and the world of work makes that a less costly thing to do.” How wonderful, then, to learn just how well equipped for caring men are.

Simple truths from the science of fatherhood.

—

Gary Barker is the founder and CEO of Equimundo: Center for Masculinities and Social Justice, one of the world’s leading organizations working at the intersection of gender equality, masculinity, and social justice.

Sarah Hrdy is an American anthropologist and primatologist who has made major contributions to evolutionary psychology and sociobiology.