If you’ve seen certain photos of me lately - laughing, glowing, seemingly lit up from the inside out - you might think you’re seeing the full picture.

And you are. In that moment.

Because in those moments, that joy was real. That ecstasy, that fullness of heart, that spark of love - I was truly feeling it.

But you weren’t seeing the whole story.

What you didn’t see is that, earlier that same day, I may have been crying in the shower with a grief so vast it felt like the ocean was inside me.

Or sitting quietly, breathing through the thick fog of fear around a health issue that’s forced me to confront my mortality.

Or feeling the sting of betrayal, channelling the rage not to destroy - but to reclaim myself.

You wouldn’t have known. You couldn’t have known.

Because on the surface, everything looks… fine. Beautiful, even.

But humans are not flat images.

We are depth.

We are joy and heartbreak. Rage and grace. Fear and courage.

We are capable of holding all of it. And I believe, with every part of me, that this is not only a skill we can build - it’s our birthright.

Through years of studying the nervous system and trauma work - particularly with the Biodynamic Breathwork and Trauma Release System - I’ve learned the powerful concept of titration.

It means we don’t have to flood ourselves to heal. We don’t have to drown in our emotions to process them.

We can touch in, and pull back.

We can feel, and then reground.

It’s the skill of building a wider window of tolerance - a nervous system resilient enough to meet emotion, without becoming consumed by it.

I like to imagine it as a river.

In the middle of that river is a whirlpool of emotion - the grief, the anger, the fear.

And on the riverbank, we are anchored. We have a rope tied to that anchor - connecting us always to our breath, our body, our resources.

From that place of groundedness, we can choose to wade in.

Dip a toe. Feel it.

Then pull back out. Regroup.

Later, we might go in deeper - maybe an ankle, a leg.

Eventually, we might immerse fully, trusting we can always come back to safety. Back to ourselves.

That’s the difference.

People fear being swallowed by emotion. And that fear keeps them stuck, numb, distracted - reaching for alcohol, substances, overworking, bingeing Netflix, scrolling endlessly.

Not because they’re weak - but because they were never taught how to feel safely.

But it doesn’t have to be this way.

This practice of titration has changed my life.

It’s given me the ability to be with the full spectrum of my experience - to feel grief without drowning, to honour anger without harming, to acknowledge fear and still move forward.

It’s also what allows me to choose joy.

Not as a bypass. Not because I’m ignoring the pain. But because I’ve made space for it. Because I’ve felt what needed to be felt.

And now, in this moment, I can allow light in.

I choose joy. I choose gratitude. I choose love.

And I want to say this, clearly:

No emotion is good or bad.

They are simply messengers, each with their own energy, their own rhythm.

Grief carries love.

Anger reveals our boundaries.

Fear often points to what matters most.

Every single one belongs.

So if you see someone smiling in a photo, remember: it may be real - but it’s not the whole story.

Just like an iceberg, there is so much more beneath the surface - memories, traumas, longings, questions, joys, hopes, heartbreaks, moments of breathtaking courage.

So please - don’t take someone at face value.

Be gentle. Be compassionate. With others, and with yourself.

Everyone is carrying something unseen.

And everyone is capable of more feeling, more healing, and more joy than they may even realise.

You are not broken for feeling deeply. You are beautifully human.

And the more we learn to meet our emotions with presence instead of fear -the more our lives will expand.

Wider. Deeper. Richer. Freer.

If you would like to work with me one to one, and explore your own spectrum of emotions, from a place of your own perceived safety, please do contact me. I am taking on new clients from September 2025 and it would be an honour to support you.