needs
There are people who’ve entered my life, filled it with their presence, and then exited. An absence standing in an expanse of the absences. An echo where voices once lived.
It’s easy to replay the way they wronged you. How they broke your trust, your heart, and their promises. How they did things they said they’d never do. It’s easy to blame them for everything. But nothing is ever that simple. Why would this be any different?
We’re all victims of something. Sometimes it’s a person, a situation, a circumstance. Sometimes it’s our own fragile hearts and our own fickle feelings. Sometimes it’s the tender wants we keep a pin in until we can no longer find the will to go on ignoring them.
Sometimes it’s a revelation. An unexpected moment. A flash-bang of clarity. When you realize that the thing you thought you could accept and live with, doesn’t meet your needs. Sometimes its the opposite. Sometimes you tell yourself you’re fine living in the gaps of something that’s missing, until you’re ready to admit how much you miss it. Sometimes it’s both of these things. Sometimes it’s something grayer. Something more in-between.
Sometimes giving yourself kindness comes with causing someone else to grieve. Sometimes holding true to your heart means failing to live up to your word. Sometimes caring for your most precious parts will hurt someone that you loved. Sometimes saving yourself, means you’ll be someone’s villain.
When it happens, when you notice, maybe you’ll have the awareness to look back and give more grace and compassion to your own transgressors. You never know how hard it was for them to listen close and follow the voice of what they felt they needed.
May you stand in the echo of what’s gone and not confuse absence with failing.
May you choose the difficult kindness of listening to what you need, even when it’s costly.
May that listening teach you grace, both for yourself and for those who are now missing.
In case no one’s told you today, I love you with all my everything.
Lovely perspective and collage accompaniments.
Hi Duane! Will the gathering today remain private or will it eventually become public? It's ok if you don't know.