Epona Harper

Mystery REM Theater 3000

2016-11-22T13:11:02Z

Well, my subconscious decided to dump out and sort through its junk drawer last night. I was either back in high school or having a really, intense dream-memory of an incident in high school where our drama teacher was putting on a play which retold the story of an avant garde (or experimental I'm not sure which) playwright. In the course of this play there were several "plays within the play" that sampled this playwright's works. Opening night, the curtain lifted to a scene from the playwright's "The Actions Inside A Washing Machine" where we had groups of students clustered together according to the colors of the jumpsuits they were wearing. They then began jumping up-and-down, spinning around in place and throwing balloons at each other. Apparently, this so offended one of the school board members in the audience that the play was shut down immediately.

Our drama teacher wasn't to be deterred. She took us to the school library where she announced she had a plan to save the production. She started trying to move the bookcases to clear some room to show us, but just ended up knocking several over, so we then had to pick up a bunch of books and re shelve them. This was complicated by the fact that the library was also doubling as a jewelry store and we also had to start picking up valuable finished pieces and loose gems, put them back and make sure none of them walked off (figuratively speaking).

I then seemed to jump to my adult years and I was dressed up to go see that play put on in a professional theater. I don't get to see it, however, because a frightened lady pulls me aside to tell me that I'm the next target of a serial killer. I soon find out the specifics. The serial killer has been irreparably crippled by his last chosen victim, so I am the target of the crippled serial killer's rather inept assistant. All the same, I take a train for Knoxville hoping to lose him (for some reason, I didn't have my car, only my bicycle and riding a bike in a skirt and heavy wool coat isn't easy).

However, the train was commandeered by the Korean Army (I think South rather than North) and used to swing by one of their camps to pick up troops to transport. I woke up as we pulled into one of the camps...And Orlando Bloom who was (and I kid you not) in his Legolas make-up and wearing a Korean uniform was the commandant.

Election Day!

2016-11-08T13:49:48Z

Well, my civic duty is fulfilled for this election cycle. I voted straight Democrat - 1) I want to keep the rabid, spray-tanned homunculus away from the nuclear codes. 2) The Republican congress needs to have its stranglehold on the government broken and the only way I can do that is try to dilute their majority with the opposite party (the one independent candidate has a snowball's chance, I fear).

You know, we really need to start a movement to have Election Day declared a national holiday. I mean, I was able to work with my office manager to clear my morning schedule so that I could easily wait two hours in line in order to cast my vote, but many other people are NOT that lucky. And, if people think this puts too many national holidays on the calendar, then let's knock off Columbus Day. I have no desire to celebrate an explorer who forced the people he discovered to bring him gold on pain of having their hands chopped off if they didn't bring enough, and then sold the native women into sexual slavery with his men.

The Flu Shot: Why bother.

2016-10-21T12:06:33Z

Crossposting from my FB page.

Okay, folks. Gather around the fire while Auntie/Doctor Harper shares her knowledge. There has been some posts lately about getting (or not getting) the flu shot, and I feel a need to weigh in.

Before we get started, let me address a few things:

First, (and I want you all to repeat this with me), this is NOT AN ATTACK AGAINST ANYONE! Get it? I’m not out to shame, belittle or vilify anyone. I’m just going to go over various arguments/ideologies that I’ve heard to give you the medical perspective with a little digression into social responsibility. Everyone clear on that? If not, read the above paragraph again.

Second, this will be only about the influenza vaccine. I may write something similar on MMR, TDaP and other vaccines on the schedule later.

Third, I will not be talking about the idea that vaccines cause autism (They don’t, but I’m not dealing with that here).

Strap in, folks, because it’s gonna be a long ride.

Argument 1: The flu isn’t such a big deal.

From a medical perspective, this is false! Let me quote from the CDC’s website on statistics from the PubMed report on the emergence of the H1N1 flu from 2009 to 2010.
“From 12 April 2009 to 10 April 2010, we estimate that approximately 60.8 million cases (range: 43.3-89.3 million), 274,304 hospitalizations (195,086-402,719), and 12,469 deaths (8868-18,306) occurred in the United States due to pH1N1.” (https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pubmed/21342903).

But, you say, H1N1 was a new flu and the vaccine that year didn’t cover it. True. However, I show these numbers as an example of what can happen when there is no vaccination whatsoever against a strain of flu.

Now for strains of flu that aren’t out-of-the-blue, aggressive strains like H1N1 (or looking back, the Spanish Flu Epidemic that killed 500,000-700,000 people in the United States and an estimated 30-40 million people worldwide) the statistics are a bit murky. This is mainly because influenza as a cause of death isn’t mandatory to report to the CDC (which I think should be changed ASAP). However…

“The US Centers for Disease Control and Prevention (CDC) estimates that flu-associated deaths in the US ranged from about 3000 to 49,000 annually between 1976 and 2006.” (http://emedicine.medscape.com/article/219557-overview#a6)

Influenza-associated deaths in children are reportable, however and…

“Since influenza-associated pediatric mortality became a nationally-notifiable condition during the 2004-2005 season, the total number of influenza-associated pediatric deaths has ranged from 37 to 171. (This excludes the 2009 pandemic, when 358 pediatric deaths were reported to CDC during April 15, 2009, through October 2, 2010.)” (http://www.cdc.gov/flu/about/season/flu-season-2015-2016.htm)

And this is only the death data. Influenza related hospitalizations are much higher.

Now, I must acknowledge that Argument 1 has a grain of truth in it. Generally, influenza is dangerous in the very old or the very young, especially if those people also have co-morbidities like lung disease, suppressed immunity, diabetes, etc. For the majority of the population, getting the flu means having to endure a particularly shitty couple of weeks. In fact, the high morbidity/mortality of 2009-2010 and the Spanish flu in 1918 was because it killed off more young adults than it did the elderly or children. (Why this happened is a subject for another discussion. Let me know if you want details.) This, naturally, leads into…

Argument 2: I’m young, healthy with no chronic health issues. Why should I bother with getting a flu shot? Other people who really need or want it can get it.

Well, the short answer is “It’s not that simple”. The longer answer is “Not everyone who needs the flu shot can get it and depend on herd immunity to protect them.” You see, for some people, regardless of their need for or desire to get the flu shot, that is simply not an option. An anaphylactic allergy to eggs is an absolute contraindication for getting the shot as the flu virus used to make the vaccines have to be grown in eggs. People can also have allergies to other components of the vaccine. A person with a history of Guillian-Barre Syndrome has to carefully weigh risk/benefit when considering this vaccine (and, since this syndrome involves progressive paralysis that usually resolves, many don’t take the risk). Children younger than 6 months cannot receive the vaccine (but they CAN still catch the flu). Some people are on immuosuppressive therapy such as chemotherapy or organ transplant maintenance and may not respond adequately to the vaccine. And some completely healthy people, through some genetic quirk, simply do not develop antibodies in response to a vaccine no matter how many times they get it. These people rely on herd immunity for protection.

What is herd immunity? You might say it’s a exploitation of the fact that the influenza virus is an obligate parasite. Unlike certain bacterial diseases (tetanus, botulism, leprosy) which can survive outside a human body for weeks or even years, influenza must have a living host to survive and spread. That means, if there are not enough vulnerable hosts around, it cannot spread. If everyone who is medically able to both get and respond to the vaccine get the shot, the infection is much less likely to get to this much smaller population because there aren’t enough “stepping stones” to reach them.

But, you might say, in the unlikely event that I get the flu, I’ll just stay away from those people. Well, I congratulate you on being financially secure enough to be able to take off work for 10 days (because the infectious period is 5-10 days). But isolating yourself from the first sniffle wouldn’t work because YOU CAN SHED THE VIRUS A FULL DAY BEFORE YOUR FIRST SYMPTOM. And just how do you know who “those people” are? Yes, babies are obvious, but lots of people with severe illness or funky immune systems wander around outside of a hospital all the time. They’re not wearing a badge with a scarlet V for “vulnerable”. By eroding herd immunity by refusing the vaccine for other than medical reasons puts your fellow man/woman/gender-unassigned at risk.

Argument 3: I’ve never had the flu and I’ve got such a strong immune system that I’ll likely never get the flu.

This argument is the medical equivalent of “I’ve never been in a car wreck, so I don’t need to wear a seatbelt.” It is also not exactly true. I’m NOT calling you a liar. I’m just wanting to say that a more accurate statement would be “I’ve never had the symptoms of flu”. Because it is possible for you to catch the flu and experience mild to absent symptoms.

“British researchers who tested people for influenza antibodies before and after each flu season for 5 years found that an average of 18% of them appeared to have contracted a flu infection each season, but only 23% of that group got sick, according to a report in The Lancet Respiratory Medicine.” (http://www.cidrap.umn.edu/news-perspective/2014/03/uk-flu-study-many-are-infected-few-are-sick)

Although we do not yet have enough evidence to say for certain that people with completely asymptomatic influenza are a factor in large-scale flu transmission (https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC2646474/), I’m greatly concerned that people with mild cases that they might not realize is actually flu may be a significant risk to herd immunity.

Argument 4: They never really know if they’ve got the strain right in this year’s vaccine, so why bother?

Well, influenza is a tricky little bastard. Not only does it have a high mutation rate on its own, but it can also be passed back and forth between humans, pigs and birds. This increases the rate of antigenic shift and drift that radically changes the virus’ genetics. Given these features, it’s pretty remarkable that they have the success rate that they do in picking the strains for the vaccine…especially since they have to make the decision in the February preceding the current flu season in order to have time to make the vaccine. However, even if there is a mismatch, having antibodies to one variety of influenza can give you partial protection against the others so that, if you do get the flu, you’ll likely have a less severe case. Insisting that a vaccine must be 100% effective or else it’s useless is falling prey to the Nirvana Fallacy.

Argument 5: But the last time I got the flu shot, I got the flu!

The flu shot that adults get is made from an inactivated (i.e. dead) virus. Therefore, it cannot give you the flu. I hear you protesting now. “But I got sick the day after I got the flu shot!” To which I ask, “How long were you sick?” The flu lasts generally for 1-2 weeks. If you had symptoms for just a couple of days, this is likely your immune system reacting to the antigens to make antibodies. If you were sick for 1-2 weeks, well, correlation doesn’t always mean a causal link. First of all, there are a ton of other viruses that cause “flu-like illness” that are not even in the same family as influenza. Second, if you went to the doctor and tested positive for influenza, bear in mind two things. 1) The incubation period for influenza is generally two days, but it can run anywhere between 1-4 days. You may have been infected before the shot and didn’t know it. 2) It takes two weeks from getting the shot to the point where you’ve built up enough antibodies to be protected. That means you can get the shot on Monday, come in contact someone with flu later that day, and wake up the next morning sick.

I hope this is helpful. Again, I’m not trying to vilify anyone. I just want to make sure you know the facts before you decide whether or not to get the jab.

Can 2016 die in a fire now?

2016-09-27T19:25:47Z

You know your day is really crappy when you find yourself spending your lunch break finding rubber ducks to put in your office fountain to cheer yourself and your staff up.

Tonight on Mystery REM Theater 3000: ROAD TRIP!

2016-08-16T12:18:13Z

Last night, I dreamed that myself, my sister and my brother-in-law were driving through Chattanooga, TN - which was largely under construction and they appeared to be building a replica of the Sunsphere from Knoxville. We drove off at one point onto an unpaved road and all four tires blew out. Fortunately, we had a "Backup Car". An "Inflatable Backup Car (TM)". I'm serious, this was a plastic package a little bigger than a breadbox that contained a bunch of car parts that then had to be inflated and strapped together with velcro. It was pale yellow and white so we looked like a cross between a tiny school bus and the Beatles' Yellow Submarine. We then installed a tiny electric motor and off we went.

Apparently, our destination was a D&D game...and the DM was a sadistic bastard. It was the start of our very first session on a new campaign. Our characters had just "met up in a tavern" when the DM says, "There's a loud roar from outside. Everybody roll a saving throw!" I rolled the lowest, so he handed me a literal flour sack of dice and told me to start rolling damage. I was rolling dice in double handfuls while the others tried to corral them. I finally said, "Dude, if the dice are falling off the table, you're using too many." He then called me a wuss and, since it was obvious he just wanted to kill off the party and make us re-roll characters for some reason, we all abandoned his game.

You shouldn't doubt the Plague Doctors....

2016-08-11T21:57:04Z

Contemplating getting back into RP again. Maybe on the current incarnation of Milliways Bar. I've got an urge to apply to play Reverend Mord from "The Hidden Almanac" podcast. If you haven't heard it, check it out.

http://www.hiddenalmanac.com

The end is in sight?

2016-08-04T16:34:10Z

Been checking up on financial things and just had a startling epiphany. Provided nothing catastrophic happens, I will have my mortgage paid off in about a year, and my student loans paid off in 3-4 years (and less than that if I plow the mortgage payment into those after the mortgage is done).

After whittling down debts for so long, I'm not sure how to feel about this.

Preach it, John!

2016-07-21T12:28:11Z

I'm trying to watch enough of political news to keep informed as to what's going on, while not watching so much that I fall into a pit of despair. I stumbled across a video where John Stewart asks, regarding the "Make America Great Again" slogan, "When exactly did they think America was great?" Which is a pretty good question that nobody in the Republican camp seems to give a definite answer on. I assume they're referencing the 1950's. Yeah, one could say that decade was great...if you were a white male. Not so much for anyone who wasn't.

That our government has come to this...

2016-07-19T19:20:18Z

A patient and I were discussing the upcoming election...

Patient: I don't like Hillary, but she's better than Trump.
Me: A ring-tailed lemur would be better than Trump! A mangy water-buffalo with a raging case of constipation would be better than Trump!

So, my lords and ladies, fill in the blank.

_________ would be better than Trump!

sigh

2016-07-18T15:14:46Z

I did it. I gave into temptation and downloaded Pokemon Go. And I've made it to level 8 in one day by way of walking the streets of Downtown Jonesborough until 10 pm last night.

Although, I do find the emerging poke-economy emerging somewhat amusing. ;)

So that I don't violate any oaths...

2016-07-15T13:26:37Z

Some people knit so that they do not kill people. Spinning has taken that role for me. ;)

Never underestimate the power of stupid people in large groups.

2016-07-14T13:51:12Z

Eeesh! The further this presidential campaign goes, the more sick to my stomach I get. Reading up on the Republican Party platform is like peering into the minds of people who think the show "Mad Men" is a display of "How Life In These United States Should Be" (i.e. returning to a time when the only opinions that mattered were those of straight, white men dominating the board room and the pulpits). I only hope that America learns a lesson from the total hash the Brexit has made of the UK. A lesson that putting demagogues in the driver's seat with the goal to return the country to "The Good Old Days" (which, if you actually look into history, never really existed) DOES NOT END WELL!

And nostalgia brings me back...

2016-07-11T18:28:43Z

Hi! I'm not dead. Just really distracted. ;)

Was paging through some old posts this weekend and I was overwhelmed with memories. I am bound and determined to make an LJ comeback and stay for the long haul. So how are you guys doing? I'm alternately amused, fascinated and infuriated by my medical career. And, on the SCA front, I'm now addicted to spinning (and soon will be dying) my own thread.

Just so you know, D-Con folks...

2014-08-24T23:51:42Z

I'm pleased to announce that Doctor Mead and the Mead Scientists will be making their triumphant return to DragonCon this year. And there will be libations abounding!

Ye gads! It's been a while.

2014-07-21T01:14:20Z

*sheepish grin*

Long time, no see, folks. Yes, I'm still alive. To celebrate my return, anyone want to crowd source a d&d god?

The next D&D character I'd like to create is a cleric, but I want to invent my own deity for said cleric. This will require a Dungeon Master who is open to such things, but I feel it will be easier if I come to the table with most of the heavy lifting already done. So here's what I've got so far.

Deity: Hy'n Li'en the God of Intoxication.
Portfolio: all substances that produce intoxication and the people who make and distribute said substances.
Alignment: Chaotic good (you know that old saying "Beer is proof that God loves us and wants us to be happy"? That's the motto of the followers of Hy'n Li'en)

Hy'n Li'en is a relatively new god, only achieving apotheosis in the last generation. Wandering clerics of this deity are charged not only with spreading the word and converting the masses to his worship, but also blessing and protecting providers of intoxicants.

The ritual incense of this sect has...a certain peculiar smell and even more peculiar effects on those who inhale it.

Priestly abilities: Blessing water to create "holy water", when done by a Hy'n Li'en cleric at lower levels will turn it into beer or wine. Which transformation takes place often aligns with the cleric's personal taste, but occasionally the god's will determines otherwise. The "holy water" retains all of its powers against undead and demonic creatures, but serves...ahem...other uses as well. HOWEVER, the unscrupulous cleric should know not to take advantage of this to the detriment of tavern keepers and bar tenders. After all, those brave souls are the favored of the god and hurting their livelihood will result in withdrawal of Hy'n Li'en's favor. As a cleric advances in the faith, the blessing to create holy water will result in high-gravity beer and/or fortified wine and (at the highest levels of the Faith) liquor.

Clerics of Hy'n Li'en also have a +(?) bonus to constitution saves against poison. After all, their livers have gotta be strong to deal with simple daily devotions.

Drawbacks: When a cleric of Hy'n Li'en casts a beneficial spell on you, you must make a constitution save against that spell making you drunk by itself. If you fail the save, you roll a D10 to determine how hard it hits you. 1-6: mildly intoxicated for 1 rounds (penalty to be determined). 7-9: strongly intoxicated for 2 rounds (penalty to be determined). 10: You are incapacitated for at least 3 rounds and must make a constitution save to re-enter combat at the end of that period.

Favored weapons would include a steel mug that is suitable as a blunt weapon and a censer for the...ahem...special incense which doubles as a morning star.

That's what I have so far. Any suggestions as to other abilities, drawbacks, history and relations with other gods of the pantheons? Since I'm not sure where I'll be able to whip this one out, insight into relations with gods of other campaign settings is welcome.

Mystery REM Theater 3000: Christmas Edition

2012-12-25T13:11:05Z

Merry Christmas, everyone! Sorry for dropping off the planet for so long. In any case, my Christmas Eve was visited by the Sandman in a way I had to share. :)

In my dream...well, to get it all, you need a semi-working knowledge of Doctor Who and Torchwood. I was recruited by a segment of Torchwood which survived the Battle of Canary Warf but wasn't coopted by Jack Harkness because they were based in the US. Since they lost their British support, they joined with the CIA to make their own little black ops organization. When they brought me in, I saw several people who had been teachers of mine in the past (in particular, my history teacher in High School and my biology professor in undergrad) who were undercover Torchwood agents. They said that they had been keeping an eye on their students to see if any were likely candidates for agents.

Well, thus began a glossed-over-by-subconscious regimen of training in stealth, disguise, infiltration, covert combat and any other skill needed by a secret agent. When I was ready...they revealed the REAL reason I had been recruited. *CUE OMINOUS MUSIC*

Turns out that my teachers/agents weren't just on the look out for good candidates. They had been actively vetting and grooming not only me, but also my sisters for a specific task. That task? To become a companion for...you guessed it...The Doctor. This particular branch of Torchwood had determined it was too risky to try to openly coerce or strong arm the Doctor. So the wanted a companion who could report on his doings, influence him to maybe do things a certain way or, if need be, plunge a knife into his back if Torchwood got fed up with his shenanigans. Since I was the only one still single when the time came, they decided to go with me. Apparently the idiots hadn't heard of Amy and Rory - or even earlier, Barbara and Ian - who proved that married couples make excellent companions for our favorite Time Lord. And why they focused on our family I have NO idea.

Well, like many dastardly plans, there was a problem - they did too good a job of making me the perfect companion. Of course I'd heard of the Doctor and respected and admired him. I told my superiors straight up that I wouldn't mind being a liason between Torchwood and the Doctor if he took me for a companion, but I was NOT going to lie to him about what I was and where I came from. And I sure as hell wasn't going to backstab him.

They were not happy to say the least. Fortunately for me, Gwen Cooper from Torchwood 3 had gotten wind that something was up and infiltrated Torchwood U.S. and helped me escape when the nasty stuff hit the fan. She got me in contact with Jack Harkness (woooo boy!) and we started the process of finding the Doctor so we could warn him about Torchwood U.S.

Wagons HO!

2012-07-27T15:02:44Z

One more sweep through the house and I'm off to Pennsic!

A matter of perspective

2012-07-26T16:02:47Z

Annoyances that are good to have: having to frequently pull up your jeans because you've lost 15 lbs. Go me!!!

Yep, diet and exercise plan is going well. Hopefully I won't gain much back at Pensic War. Finally making it to the 2 week SCAdian Mecca. If anyone else is going, ask for Etain at the Dragonshade camp. :)

An update...and an endorsement.

2012-07-06T12:53:02Z

Well, we're in mid summer, Johnson City has finally gotten some much-needed rain and I'm getting geared up for my first Pensic War. I'm also finally making progress again in reducing my BMI.

You see, in spite of doing weight training (for both SCA fighting and archery) and fairly regular cardio, my weight kept hovering around the high 190's. As I have repeatedly told my patients, "matter and energy can neither be created nor destroyed", so I needed to get a better handle on my caloric intake. My trainer recommended the MyFitnessPal (http://www.myfitnesspal.com/). Ladies and gentlemen, this app is wonderful! I've been using it for one week and I've dropped 8 lbs. of course, if it keeps dropping that fast over the next week, I'll be adjusting the settings (losing weight too fast makes for higher risk of rebound), but hopefully I'll be back down to 175 by October. If you're having problems losing weight and have a compatible smartphone, try this out!

That dancing fool!!!

2012-06-29T01:18:28Z

Matt Harding is at it again. Clicky for smiles. :)

Hear them roar!

2012-06-22T23:56:25Z

I think Paul and Storm speak for us all where _A Song of Ice and Fire_ (aka _Game of Thrones_) is concerned.

Mystery REM Theater 3000: The Pandorica will open...and Winter is coming.

2012-04-24T12:10:34Z

Dear subconscious,

First, let me congratulate you on your creativity. Not everyone can manage a half-way coherent merger of Doctor Who and _A Game of Thrones_. (Although how Alliser Thorne wound up using a polar bear as his mode of transportation when he went beyond the Wall, I have no idea.)

However, if you're going to throw in a climactic scene where the Doctor is being chased by the Silence through the Eyrie (he somehow got Lysa Tully mad at him...but that's easy for ANYONE to do, much less the Doctor), could you please do it right before my alarm is set to go off instead of an hour and a half before that? It's very hard to get back to sleep after something that exciting.

It's Heeeeeere!

2012-04-16T18:53:54Z

Well, my much-awaited longbow arrived.

Its actual draw weight is 57#.

And its total length is 6' 5". That's 10 inches longer than I am tall! This ain't a longbow. This is a sweet-mother-that's-freaking-long bow. :)

"Caption This!" - Round 3

2012-04-12T23:55:03Z

And how about something for fandom. The Kingdom of Merides has a themed party at their Gulf Wars social.

I'm not an addict. I can stop anytime I want!

2012-04-12T18:26:22Z

So I found a Osage Orange longbow of apparently high quality for a very reasonable price (2/3 the cost of a similar bow from a US bow company).

The catch? The bowyer is in Hungary. :)

But we live in a global economy, so I ordered it earlier this week.

Now I'm making a fool of myself tracking it. "Budapest! It's just left Budapest!"

*sigh*. Is there a term for when you go beyond just being an archer to being the archery equivalent of a geek?

Edit: It just reached Germany!

Yes, I'm pathetic. This bowyer also makes traditional water-buffalo horn laminate horsebows. I may end up owing this Hungarian artisan my firstborn. :)