Confession

There is a person that I love, but I am not sure how to tell them.

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There is a person that I love, and I am not sure how to tell them.

They are someone I admire, constantly striving to be a better person. They smile at the cashier and ask in earnest how they’re doing. They work hard to be considerate of other people. They are smart, but are still learning so much. They are creative and hard-working and open.

There is a person that I love, but they are not perfect.

Sometimes they get lost in their own thoughts and miss the obvious. Sometimes they act like people should automatically know what their expectations are. Sometimes they lose their patience. Often, they miss opportunities for kindness and sometimes are even a little selfish.

There is a person that I love, but they don’t always know their worth.

They get down sometimes, although they try not to show it.  They might focus on their faults and need reminders of their strengths. They extend grace and forgiveness, often more than is wise. They occasionally fall into unhealthy relationships. They try to shine God’s love, but forget to reflect it on themselves.

There is a person that I love, but I am afraid it would be awkward to tell them.

Then again, maybe that isn’t important. Maybe what really matters is that they get to know how I feel. Maybe they have days when knowing I care could make all the difference in the world. And it might be awkward, it might come out wrong, people might misconstrue. It may cause issues with those who don’t understand. But they should know. They deserve to know. And so I’ll start with this:

Hello, Me. You matter. You are a glowing creation of God, a being of purpose and wonder. I am happy you’re here. I love you.

-KJ Roe

The Dance

 

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Photo from Vinita Chamber of Commerce

The glance, the look, the smile
Hesitation, approach, question
Acquiesce, touch hands, lead out
The rhythm, the steps, the sway
Apart, together, human harmony
Drum beats, heart beats, budding hope
Joy in moments, moments of wonder, wonderful uncertainty
Gazing eyes, curving lips, hands on hips
Courage gathered, breath held, head tips
The spark, the light, the fireworks
Exploding on the dance floor

-KJ Roe

Bewildered

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Where does it come from
This belief people have
That we can put ourselves first
Ignore the small things
And destroy the big ones.
What happened to
Politeness and
Kindness
And manners
Holding a door
Putting the cart back
And helping the person whose things are scattered?
Who said it’s okay to
Ignore the greeting
Drop the relationship
And jump in with rude commentary on
     A person we know nothing about?
Why would we want to
Respond in hate
Hurt the broken
Injure the innocent
And prove ourselves to be
     So much less than who we claim to be?
-KJ Roe

Gossamer

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Charcoal clouds scud across
An ocean of sky,
A thread of song running
Counterpoint to
The pictures in my mind,
An unintended soundtrack
Rising and falling
To a disparate rhythm-
Now background,
Now cacophony,
Full of its own words
Stories to tell in notes
And tunes and cymbals clashing
As I fall deeper in,
Like Alice,
Into imagination
And daydreams
And the realities of
Make believe
Until a warm touch
On my shoulder
Brings me out of my reveries,
Waking to the sun’s caress
Reaching through aged clouds,
Bidding me arise, awake,
Return from mushroom rings and
Flaming kings and
Queens of beauty bright.
Disconcerted, I raise my head,
Blink in unexpected light,
Summoned from
My home
To this strange and
Earthly life.
-KJ Roe

Being Mother

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Photo Credit Toree Marcano

I see the circle, the ripples going out, ever expanding.
My child walking a similar path. The various “extra” siblings I brought into her life (and the ones she brought into mine). I see the love she holds, the laughter, the strength. I watch as her heart takes in a young child, readily being second mother to him, cuddling, loving, playing, teaching. I see how naturally it comes to her, how in love with this child she already is. I watch also as her belly grows, a new life, wished and worked into being with God’s grace, and hear her hopes and plans and dreams. I feel the kicks, dream the dreams, wait with anticipation. I take to my heart her new child, and the coming baby; I read her favorite stories to them, and give what I hope is another stronghold for both. I watch as she lives a lesson learned throughout life, a lesson taught to me by my mother: Every child deserves to be safe, and to be loved, and to laugh. We hold this candle in the window for the child who may need it to light the way, however briefly and for whatever reason.
Don’t fear, little ones. The road is hard, but the path is lit by love.
-KJ Roe

Subtle

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The willow, slender as it is,
misleads
The alder branch a weak thing
that overtakes
A drop of water no threat
until the flood
And the feathered fledgling
but a glimpse of freedom’s flight
The infant’s cry is a prelude
to life’s aria
Child’s tears the lessons
to wisdom’s strength
Parent’s comfort the roots
of flowered hope
And quiet grace the uplift
for heart’s soaring journey.

-KJ Roe

Rise

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Scarred and raw
Lost and confused
Path obscured
Reaching down deep
Grasping strength like
An unbreakable cable
She rises up
The only way to go
Is forward
The only path
Is light
And the wind carries
Her whispered roar:
“You can’t keep me down.”

-KJ Roe

From the Ashes

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Wispy tendrils wind their way
up into the air
Smoke rising from cooling ash
Gray-white-black collapsing in
Onto gleaming red-orange
Windows to fluorescent opulence
Quickly shuttered by chemical reaction
Seemingly molecular changes
Covering the heat within
Masquerading as a diminished thing
Its heart buried in what’s been burnt
Stirred by the faintest breeze
Bits of past’s debris teased away
Swirling, gliding, winging on scalloped
Ringlets of misty dreams rekindled.
-KJ Roe

Drops of Time

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It’s those little things
Those ones that pass so quickly
The moments that make us stop,
pause,
Breathe again
The ones we wished
we’d held onto
The thick, honey-sweet beauty
Glistening in the passage of time
Shining like sunset rays
On tidal waters
Startlingly beautiful
Momentarily grasped
Too soon past
The love that lifts,
The fall, the burn,
the crash
The joy that holds,
The squalls abided
Struggles withstood
The imperfections
Marking the perfection
Of a real, unimagined life
Too true to be false
Too messy for the fairy tale
Too fleeting, then lost
Too wondrous to be forgot.
-KJ Roe

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