The Path I Fear to Tread

Just dropping by...

2017-09-14T23:58:29Z

I know I post one of these 'Hey I'm not dead!' entries more frequently than I do regular entries. I don't even know how much of my F-list is still active on LJ, or if everyone has migrated to Dreamwidth. I need to post a proof of life entry over there soon, too. Good thing I bought permanent accounts.

How is everyone?

Brief update, by the numbers:

Cats - two still living the high life with my parents
Dogs - five, all darling savages who do nothing but eat food and wreck my flat
Other critters - two semi-feral budgies that are resistant to all attempts at socialization, way too many fish tanks
Job - still a paediatric nurse, working a temp in ortho clinic
Health - well, though in my post-middle age I have gained a few of the pounds I'd lost in the early teens of this century
Activities - slave to the Union lol. Lots going on with government trying to legislate our rights away, increasing incidents of violence in the workplace, and making sure my local is working to the best of its abilities
Other - been working with a local dog rescue for a few years, taking in fosters and finding them permanent homes
Current fandom faves - still with some of the classics, like SPN, The X-Files; re-runs of BtVS and AtS have me craving some good Spike/Wesley fic, Stargate: Universe, Preacher, Marvel's Agents of Shield, just to list a few

Hello

2015-08-19T00:14:46Z

Not dead, just lazy. I hate that Failbook has become source one for social interaction for me; granted a lot of workmates post there so it is easy to set up fun things to do in our off-time. And, the rescue I foster for does a lot of communication via their FB page and messaging. But I do miss y'all here (Dreamwidth might not even know who I am anymore lol).

So tell me, F-listers, what is new and exciting??

My latest foster dog

2014-07-30T20:40:25Z

Last week I took in a foster dog for a local rescue https://www.facebook.com/littersncritters?fref=nf . In the past 10 days the rescue has needed fosters for about 10 dogs (and that number is climbing). I put in a comment that said I would take one of the fosters talked about in the foster email, but Shelley and Jennifer asked me to take this little guy instead. His name was Chico (gross). They said he was a Chihuahua that was seized from a home due to abuse (and possible puppy mill activity). He was very fearful, aggressive and shut down, but would I take him? So I said yes.

The first thing that happened once I got him is I changed his name. After a day or two of calling him "Buddy" and "Pup" I decided he was an Oliver. Not long after, I did some research, because this boy did not look like a Chi. He has very long legs, a long body and a tail to match. It was apparent, after looking at some photos, that Ollie was a Miniature Pinscher; if there was Chi in him, it wasn't much!

After a few days, Ollie began to come out of his shell: he let me pet him, he took treats (not any treat would do, mind you) gently from my hand, and one night he abandoned his little bed in the foyer and invited himself up on the big bed. Milestone! He turned out to be quite the cuddler. After that night he began to seek attention, sitting with me on the couch and begging to come up in my lap while I am at the computer (which is where he is right now). He loves walks (or should I say sprints - he's go-go-go out on a leash) and today he went up to a stranger and solicited an invitation. And that was only Day 2 of actually letting me leash him. Crazy great progress for little more than a week in a stable, happy-dog household.

He still has a ways to go with eating meals around the other dogs. I have to lure him towards his dish with kibble and then stand sentry over everyone while they eat. Then housebreaking needs to be addressed. Now that he knows leash/collar + me = outside funtimes we can give that a go.

Anyway, that was a loooooooooong story to get to the point of the post: a picture of Oliver. He doesn't like things in his face (naturally) so he hated the camera and tried to hide from it, but I think I got a pic or two that shows how handsome he is :)

Keep the good times rolling...

2014-07-22T22:52:33Z

So it has been three weeks since I started working in my new role in the Paeds Ortho clinic and I am slowly getting back into the routines of booking pre-ops, doing phone interviews and trying to keep my designated Ortho surgeon on track with his patients, their calls and follow-ups, and tests. I really like the surgeon I am assigned to, but he has a bad habit of just going to the first clinic nurse he sees and asks them for help. It kind of bothered me, and I thought maybe he didn't want me as his assigned RN. I talked to one of the other nurses there and she said not to take it personally, it was just something he was used to doing. So that is fine, but I don't like that he is putting work for me onto the other nurses, who have their own surgeons to follow. They can be busy enough without his add-ons. It is also proving difficult to get him to sit still for two minutes to review messages and notes, so I feel like I am intruding on his time. Here's hoping he and I will get ourselves in sync soon.

On another front I took in a new foster dog tonight. This little guy is the first one I've cared for that came from a really bad home situation - abuse and most likely a puppy mill set up. He is very shut down, yelps and snaps/soft bites if he is touched and just flattens to the ground when he is overwhelmed by the attention - or in this case, my four obnoxious dogs who bark their heads off if he even moves. He hasn't moved far; I had him on lead up to the kitchen but when he wouldn't let me take his lead off he went back down to the foyer. I want to give him some space, but with the other dogs dashing over to bark at him every three minutes I keep entering his safe zone. The last time, though, he did give my hand a decent sniffing, but would not follow me back up to the main level.

Nothing else new going on... I was invited to be on the Nova Scotia Federation of Labour float for this Saturday's Pride Parade, but if the new dog is still in avoidance mode I may skip it in order to watch over him. I am going to re-name him too. His current name is awful and completely unimaginative (and he's a Chihuahua, so his name is also kinda racist). Maybe with being called a new name he will dissociate from the bad experiences.

And how are y'all today?

Still Alive

2014-06-17T20:39:42Z

Whoa, I had no idea it had been over 7 months since I last updated this journal, and even longer since I visited Dreamwidth! It has been a jam-packed few months, but still, not an excuse for failing to drop in and check out my lovely F-listers!

I guess the most exciting thing that has happened in the past while was some surgery I had a couple of weeks ago. With zero warning I started having some substernal pain early one morning, which over the course of 4 hours had crept up through my chest and clear through to my back. Realizing that there was a definite problem, I had a parent drive me to the ER, which involved a lot of poking, pressing and ultrasounding. Pain was getting worse, but nothing touched it until I caved and took some S/C hydromorphone. The pain of that injection was almost worse than my belly, but once it started to kick in it definitely took the edge off the discomfort. So, the verdict was I was having a gallbladder attack. Whee. I had one stone that was positioned just right (in the gallbladder neck, right next to the duct) that the only solution was surgery. All went well with the laparoscopic procedure and the post-op pain was well tolerated with pain meds. I was SO happy when oral meds were covering the pain, because having to face those injections every few hours was harsh. I was off work for two weeks - some people think I need to take at least two more weeks - and I trial going back onshift this Friday. So we shall see then if I need more time off.

The other stuff I've been doing - aside from work and union business - has been fostering dogs for a local rescue. I've fostered three dogs so far through to their adoption and, for better or worse, I just volunteered to foster another that needs to come to the big city for treatment after being hit by a car. I might not get the pup, but of course, competitive me, put in the 'I can do it!' comment the moment the Facebook post hit my screen - and the pup isn't even in this province yet! So we will see.

What else of note... Well, fandom-wise, little has changed, with the exception of the addition of the Marvel 'Verse, specifically Agents of Shield. Yep, I became a Coulson girl last fall (watching The Avengers 20 times on the Movie channels helped move that process along...) and despite its slow start I really thought the second half of it's season (post-release of Thor: The Dark World lived up to the grand promise of a Marvel + Whedon enterprise. I can't wait for the second season to start.

Please tell me how y'all are and what's been the goings on! I really miss you guys. I am going to have to schedule LJ time on my calendar from now on!

Jared applauds my attempt to LJ.

2013-11-04T21:38:26Z

Just when I think I am going to have a better presence on LJ I get distracted by CrackBook, work and other life shenanigans. Here I am for the umpteenth time trying to get back into the flow around here!

So the past couple of months have been interesting. Work and Union stuff hasn't really changed; it is neither better nor worse than at the last time I posted. Family-wise, the parents have gone out of their way to clean up their lives, in a financial way at least. They took a mortgage out on the house and paid off several bills, including a car loan that was in my name for their truck, taxes and some other debts. While that is good, it is bad in another way: the long-term plan is to put their house into my name, so that if mother fucks up again in the future, the house cannot be compromised, however I am now saddled with having a house, soon in my name, with a mortgage attached, and the plan was for me to use the house to secure a serious home renovation loan, which now will be less the $40 grand mortgage cost. That puts a major dent in what I wanted to do - and what needs to be done - to get the house back in order and improve its value. I am not short-shrifting anything: I want real, plank wood floors, not laminate. I want real ceramic tile floors for the bathrooms, not vinyl. I want a third level, a re-landscaped back yard, new appliances, furniture... the whole shebang. This will be my house so I want to do it right.

The one really new thing in my life is that I recently started to foster rescue dogs. I got my first foster pup a couple of weeks ago, and the Sunday before Hallowe'en, after being with me for 5 days, he went to a new home. Unfortunately, it did not work out: the lady who took him was very nice, but the pup was too much for her to handle on her own. She has a baby and her husband is away at work, and this pup is very high-energy and still needs a lot of training. So, today he came back to stay with me until another adopter is found. His name is Howie, he is estimated to be 5 months old, and came from a far-north town in Labrador. Howie is a Reserve dog, a largely homeless mutt that, due to their incredible numbers have earned the breed name of 'Mushkadoodle'. These dogs are mixes of Husky, Retriever, Collie, Shepherd and other working-dog breeds that are left to run free, reproduce, and spend their lives scavenging for food and shelter. Most Reserves, sadly, solve their stray dog problems by shooting them in massive culls. A private rescue in my city, called Litters 'n Critters, have arranged air lifts, one or two a year, to bring dogs and pups down from Labrador to find adopters here in Nova Scotia. The dogs come in a myriad of colours and coat patterns, but they all have one thing in common: as puppies, they are fluffy balls of fur with glittering eyes that are the definition of adorable.

Here is Howie, after coming back into my house tonight:

Because he still needs training, he is currenty tethered to my waist, and is jumping and running in place playing with two of my other dogs. He is getting SO tangled in his lead, but until his housebreaking skills improve, he can't roam the house.

Well, that is long enough for a 'Hey, here I am again!' post! Off to find something to make for supper...

TV Meme found via wolfling

2013-11-03T19:52:24Z

Like wolfling I need to remind people I do exist! CrackBook is very distracting...

- Bold all of the following TV shows of which you've seen 3 or more episodes.
- Italicize a show if you're positive you've seen every episode.
- Asterisk * if you have at least one full season on tape, DVD, or blu ray.
- If you want, add up to 3 additional shows (keep the list in alphabetical order).

@ denotes my additions

3rd Rock from the Sun
21 Jump Street
24*
The 4400
The Adventures of Pete and Pete
Alias
American Gothic
America's Next Top Model
The Andy Griffith Show
Angel *
The Apprentice
Are You Afraid of the Dark
Are You Being Served?
Arrested Development
@Arrow*
Ashes to Ashes
The A-Team
The Avengers
Babylon 5
Babylon 5: Crusade
Barney Miller
Batman: The Animated Series
Battlestar Galactica (the old one)
Battlestar Galactica (the new one)
Baywatch
Being Human - UK
Being Human - US
Beavis & Butthead
Beauty and the Beast (the original Linda Hamilton and Ron Perlman version)
The Beverly Hillbillies
Beverly Hills 90210
Bewitched
The Bionic Woman
Black Books
Blackadder
Blake's 7
Bonanza
Bones
Bosom Buddies
Boston Legal
Boston Public
Boy Meets World
The Brady Bunch
Breaking Bad
Brideshead Revisited
Buck Rogers in the 25th Century
Buffy the Vampire Slayer *
Bug Juice
Caitlin's Way
Carebears
Catweazle
Chappelle's Show
Charlie's Angels
Charmed
Cheers
Chicago Hope
Clarissa Explains It All
The Closer
The Colbert Report
Cold Case
Columbo
Commander in Chief
Community
The Cosby Show
Coupling
Cowboy Bebop
Criminal Minds
Crossing Jordan
CSI
CSI: Miami
CSI: NY
Curb Your Enthusiasm
The Daily Show
Dallas
Damages
Dancing with the Stars
Danny Phantom
Dark Angel *
Dark Skies
Davinci's Inquest
Dawson's Creek*
The Days and Nights of Molly Dodd
Dead Like Me
The Dead Zone *
Deadwood
Degrassi: The Next Generation
Designing Women
Desperate Housewives
Dharma & Greg
The Dick Van Dyke Show
Dinosaurs
Different Strokes
Dirty Jobs
Doctor Who (1963 - 1986)
Doctor Who (2005) *
Dragnet
The Dresden Files *
Dr. Quinn Medicine Woman
Due South*
Earth 2
Emergency!
Entourage
ER
Everwood
Everybody Loves Raymond
Extreme Makeover: Home Edition
Facts of Life
Family Guy
Family Matters
Family Ties
The Famous Jett Jackson
Farscape
Father Ted
Fawlty Towers
Felicity
Firefly *
Flash Forward
The Flintstones
Forever Knight
Fraggle Rock
Frasier
Freaks and Geeks
The Fresh Prince of Bel-Air
Friday Night Lights
Friends
Full House
Futurama
Game of Thrones
Gargoyles
Get Smart
Ghostwriter
Gilligan's Island
Gilmore Girls*
The Golden Girls
Gomer Pyle, U.S.M.C.
The Goodies
Greek
Green Wing
Grey's Anatomy
Growing Pains
Gummi Bears
Gunsmoke
Hannah Montana
Happy Days
Hardcastle & McCormick
Heroes
Highlander
Highlander: The Raven
Hogan's Heroes
Hillstreet Blues
Home Improvement
Homicide: Life on the Street*
The Honeymooners
House
Hunter
I Dream of Jeannie
I Love Lucy
Instant Star
Inuyasha
Invader Zim
Invasion*
The Invisible Man
JAG
Jackass
Jeeves and Wooster
The Jeffersons
Jem
Jericho
The Jetsons
Joey
John Doe
Just Shoot Me
Justice League Unlimited
Justified
Keen Eddie
The Kindred
Knight Rider
The L Word
LA Law
Land of the Lost
Laverne and Shirley
Law & Order
Law & Order: Criminal Intent
Law & Order: Special Victims Unit
Leverage
Lexx
Life on Mars - UK
Life on Mars - US
Life With Derek
Little House on the Prairie
Lizzie McGuire
Lois and Clark: The New Adventures of Superman
Lost
Lost in Space
Love, American Style
The Love Boat
The Lucille Ball Show
M*A*S*H *
MacGyver
Mad Men
The Magnificent Seven
Magnum PI
Malcolm in the Middle
Mama's Family
The Man from U.N.C.L.E.
Married... With Children
The Mary Tyler Moore Show
Melrose Place
MI:5*
Miami Vice
The Mighty Boosh
Millennium
Miracles
Mission: Impossible (the remake)
Monk
The Monkees
Monty Python's Flying Circus
Mork & Mindy
The Munsters
The Muppet Show
Murphy Brown
My Life as a Dog
My Little Pony
My Name is Earl
My So-Called Life
My Super Sweet 16
My Three Sons
My Two Dads
The Mythbusters
The Nanny
News Radio*
NCIS
Night Court
Nip/Tuck
North Shore
Numb3rs
NYPD Blue*
The O.C.
The Office (UK)
The Office (US)
Once Upon a Time
One Tree Hill
Oz
Paranormal Witness
Perry Mason
Phil of the Future
Pokemon
Popular
Power Rangers
The Pretender
Prison Break
Profiler
Project Runway
Psych
QI
Quantum Leap
Queer As Folk (US) *
Queer as Folk (UK) *
The Real World
Red Dwarf
ReGenesis
Relic Hunter
Remington Steele
@Ripper Street
Rocco's Modern Life
The Real Ghostbusters
ReBoot
Rescue Me
Road Rules
Robin of Sherwood
Robotech
ROME
Roseanne
Roswell
Rugrats
Salute Your Shorts
Saved by the Bell
Scarecrow and Mrs King
Scooby-Doo, Where Are You?
Scrubs
SeaQuest
The Sentinel
Seinfeld
Sex and the City
The Shield
Silver Spoons
The Simpsons
Six Feet Under
The Six Million Dollar Man
Skins
Sliders
Slings and Arrows*
Smallville
So Weird
So You Think You Can Dance
South Park
Space: Above and Beyond
Spaced
Space 1999
Spongebob Squarepants
Sports Night
The Sopranos
Star Trek
Star Trek: The Next Generation
Star Trek: Deep Space Nine
Star Trek: Voyager
Star Trek: Enterprise
Stargate Atlantis
Stargate SG-1 *
Starsky and Hutch
The Suite Life of Zack and Cody
Superman: The Animated Series
Supernatural *
Surface
Survivor
Taxi
Teachers
Teen Titans
Teen Wolf
Tenth Kingdom
That 70's Show
That's So Raven
Third Watch *
Three's Company
Thunderbirds are Go!
Thundercats (the old one)
Thundercats (the new one)
Tiger & Bunny
TJ Hooker
Top Gear
Torchwood
The Tribe
The Tudors
The Twilight Zone
Twin Peaks*
Twitch City
Two and A Half Men
UFO
Ugly Betty
Under the Umbrella Tree
The Unusuals
Veronica Mars
The Vicar of Dibley
@The Walking Dead
The Waltons
The West Wing
Warehouse 13
Where in the World is Carmen San Diego?
White Collar
The White Queen
Whitechapel
The Wire
Whose Line is it Anyway? (US)
Whose Line is it Anyway? (UK)
Will and Grace
Wings
Wiseguy
Without a Trace
Wolf Lake
WKRP in Cincinnati
Xena: Warrior Princess
The X-Files>/i> *
X-Men
X-Men: Evolution

Wow...

2013-07-21T14:41:20Z

You forget to login to LJ for awhile and somehow your journal style changes.

Hi world :)

Spin world, spin...

2013-04-21T17:43:31Z

Yet again I have had an unplanned sabbatical from El-Jay. Mostly it was due to me forgetting to check in, and not for some other kerfuffle-y thing, tru fax. Plus, having enrolled my dog Sammy in daycare has resulted in many hours of refreshing the place's FB page looking for pictures of my baby, which is one of the reasons I chose to put him in that daycare. My early birthday present from my parents was a gift certificate for 10 more days at the centre. Which is good; Sam loves it there and has made many doggie friends.

I have nothing fandomish to comment on; I somewhat enjoyed the season finale of The Walking Dead and am glad it is only a 6 month wait until Season 4. SPN and Arrow are soon wrapping up their seasons, so the PVR is ready and waiting, as I will be working nightshifts later in May and won't see them as they air. I may make a few ~~millon~~ icons in the next few days. I am beginning to not like my PSP X, mostly because of its text function, which has made positioning shit where I want it extremely difficult. I have also lost, somewhere, half of my textures, which are nowhere to be found on my hard drive. I have them on a disc somewhere, but my disc drive stopped working. Sigh.

On a more fun note (?) I am taking a semi-vacation right now. I say semi because the plans I'd hope to have had never happened. What will be happening is many days of spring cleaning and prep for a conference at the end of the month. Plus, without the shiftwork schedule pounding my psyche and body for a couple of weeks, I might get into a more regular sleep/wake cycle, and not require as many drugs to help me sleep or keep me up when I stagger out of bed late in the morning.

How are you out there?

Heartbroken

2013-02-08T15:41:45Z

I am losing Fox tonight.

He has been sick for almost two years and nothing has helped. Changing foods, medication after medication, which only recently gave him a full week of relief from vomitting. He is so dehydrated now that his eyes are truly sunken. He picks at food, will drink, but not clean himself afterwards. The meowing and crying have returned after a merciful three day reprieve after we started the latest medication.

I have been crying all week. I was a mess on the phone talking to the vet clinic yesterday. I know it is time. Fox, on some level, knows it is time. No matter what I tell myself - or what other 'kindhearted people' tell me - I feel like I am abandoning him, giving up, not being his protector and trusted companion. I am failing him. Or I have already failed him. Either way the guilt is killing me.

But, then again, it's not about me. Right?

Ahem.

2013-01-18T23:23:32Z

No one has asked my opinion regarding many recent current events, so, in true Dean Winchester style, I will share them, with you. Feel free to discuss, I am at home sick and am kinda bored, so come play!

The Idle No More movement

http://ca.news.yahoo.com/blogs/canada-politics/idle-no-more-movement-gets-sympathy-alleged-american-214955487.html

Glad you are idle no more. Would be gladder if you could offer up words equal parts of strategies to make things better and personal responsibility for your situation.

Lance Armstrong

You deserve nothing. This whole Mea Culpa thing is a fat old sham. You are a liar, a cheat and a bully.

Chief Theresa Spence

http://ca.news.yahoo.com/buckingham-palace-rejects-appeal-intervene-chief-spences-protest-215448879.html

And the Oscar goes to. Tell me where my $34 million went last year and maybe I will forgive you for the multi-million dollar stock portfolio, Escalade, and six figure salary. It must be hard living in Attawapiskat in nice warm house while those in your band don't even have siding or drinkable water. To do so takes alot of character. And you are so a character.

Supernatural

STOP MAKING MY BOYS MAD AT EACH OTHER! I AM SO TIRED OF THE 'WHO WILL SAM/DEAN CHOOSE??' STORYLINE! WRITERS: CREATIVITY. YOU NEED SOME.

And explain to me your rationale of recycling character names all of a sudden? I know you recycle actors, but the names? WTF are you up to?

Jim Butcher

Jim, very glad that you finally released the next Harry Dresden novel. Not so glad that you continue to shove a zillion problems in Harry's face and not give the reader a chance to experience Harry reconnecting with his friends and family and sussing out what being the Winter Knight really means. Seriously? A supernatural virus that makes magickal creatures and wizards go effing mad, a REAL parasite in his noggin that could bust out of an eye socket at any time, a cranky island more screwed up than anything you could find on the one in 'Lost' that, by the way, is about to explode and release the things on its bamillionty Top 1000 Evil Creatures list. You coulda just picked one or two without the layering of multiple armageddons and truly gruesome ways for him to die. Again

dragonflymuse @ 2013-01-05T20:11:00

2013-01-06T00:11:44Z

In 2013, dragonflymuse resolves to...

Take evening classes in californication.
Spend more time with my my four-leggeds.
Cut down on my reading.
Buy new james marsters.
Overcome my secret fear of jensen ackles.
Lose ten twin peaks by March.

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAND.............

On the twelfth day of Christmas, dragonflymuse sent to me...

Twelve zabiras drumming

Eleven redeem147s piping

Ten sam80853s a-leaping

Nine lapetiteflowers dancing

Eight pfeifferpacks a-milking

Seven btvs a-reading

Six ats a-writing

Five je-e-e-ensen ackles

Four twin peaks

Three my four-leggeds

Two james marsters

...and a spesley in a david duchovny.

Meme for 2012 (as per crackers4jenn)

2012-12-29T22:29:36Z

1. Where did you begin 2012?
In bed. ALONE. Asleep.

2. What did you do in 2012 that you'd never done before?
I ran for a regional vice presidency in the Union. I lost. But lots of folks were very supportive. And I ad-libbed my whole speech. I didn't know WTF to say.

3. Did you keep your new years' resolutions, and will you make more for next year?
No. No I did not. The sinister lure of Tim Horton's muffins and online shopping decimated both my waistline and my Visa Card.

I may make resolutions for 2013. But not making any means I won't break any and my self-esteem would love that!

4. Were you in school (anytime this year)?
Labour School. And the odd work-based education day or two.

5. Did anyone close to you give birth?
Oh, just about half of my co-workers. For some time people kept making jokes about drinking the water/using the restroom/other nonsense on our unit.

6. Any new additions to your family?
Three fishes. Just today too!

7. Did anyone close to you die?
Does one of my cats count? Gosia died 12/12/12.

8. Did you know anybody who got married?
A few. I attended one wedding this year, in Las Vegas, which was... interesting.

9. What countries did you visit?
Just the States. I have no time or money to go elsewhere. And I only wound up in the States because of my friend's wedding.

10. How did you earn your money?
Regular pay - working as a staff RN at the hospital. Extra pay by performing Local President duties for the Union. No lotto wins.

11. Where did most of your money go?
Uh, RENT. The vets. To Apple.

12. Did you have any encounters with the police?
Yep, mostly around questionable child abuse or child neglect cases. Unfun.

13. What would you like to have in 2013 that you lacked in 2012?
Sex. Preferably with someone I like, who likes me too, and is within ten years of my age. I mean, all you 20-somethings are cute and I am flattered, but dudes, I can't worry about being seen as a cradle-robber. And if you look like Clive Owen, Paul Blackthorne or Andrew Lincoln, all the better.

Financial security.

Weight loss. Which may mean re-evaluating my crazy meds. Urgh.

I have to start thinking about enrolling in a Masters program. Ugh school. Ugh more debt.

14. What date(s) from 2012 will remain etched upon your memory, and why?
I have a problem with memory, short term and long. The only date etched in the brane is 12/12/12, the day Gosia died. May was a big month, with the Vegas wedding and the 27 year-old fire fighter I hit second base with at our Union AGM.

15. What was your biggest achievement of the year?
Only got pulled in the office once! YAY me! And even with that I think I have a medical 'out' for the anger and bitchery I was accused of on a day from hell at work.

16. What was your biggest failure?
Weight gain. Poor money management.

17. Did you suffer illness or injury?
I self-diagnosed myself with PMDD. If I can get my doc to sign off on it I can present it to the higher-ups at work and won't earn as many lectures on professional behaviour because, dude, I HAVE AN ILLNESS!! I NEED MORE SEROTONIN! AND CHOCOLATE!

18. Where did you go on holidays/vacation?
Vegas. Wedding.

19. What was the best thing you bought?
Sadly, with all of the shopping I've done this year, I don't have a 'best thing'. Maybe the medications that keep my cat Fox alive, the meds that help with Sammy's ear infections, the meds that keep me from flipping out completely and bitch-slapping EVERYONE at work. After Gosia died I bought an iPad 2.

20. Whose behavior merited celebration?
Mine. I may have had my cranky/bitchy moments, but I didn't make anyone bleed or beg for their life, so Go Team Me.

21. Whose behavior made you appalled and depressed?
All those female GOP supporters. Stephen Harper's asshattery on... everything. Those people out there who do incredibly cruel and heartless things to animals, of which my Facebook friends page is constantly railing against. With pictures, no less. Breaks my heart. People suck.

22. What did you get really, really, really excited about?
TV. Found a new show to like - Arrow. Happy for my Winchesters to be back, though part of me is hoping this is the last season and maybe they can turn to the odd feature film in the future. Retro pay from our contract.

23. Did you move anywhere?
Nope.

24. Where do you live now?
Same place I lived last year.

25. What song will always remind you of 2012?
I ignored new music. I hated all of it.

26. Compared to this time last year, are you:
i. happier or sadder? Um, sadder? The same? Definitely not happier.
ii. thinner or fatter? Fatter. Grossly fatter :(
iii. richer or poorer? One paycheque away from bankruptcy, just like 99% of the other North American adults out there.

27. What do you wish you'd done more of?
Watched my diet. Saved some money - which means pay down my credit cards and not rack up more sales on them days later. Been kissed.

28. What do you wish you'd done less of?
Eat. Talk endlessly about our Uniform policy.

29. How will you be spending Christmas?
I worked December 24, 25, 26. The rest of the time from the 27th - January 3 I will be sleeping, cleaning, gathering up stuff for the Salvation Army and local SPCA.

30. What do you want for Christmas?
Doesn't matter. I'd never get it, and what I do get, I don't want. Not to sound ungrateful, but a few years ago I asked that in lieu of the token gift I wanted donations to the animal shelter or one of the many rescues in the province.

31. Where are you spending New Year's? and with who?
I will be alone. In bed. Probably asleep. Sounds familiar...

32. Did you fall in love in 2012?
Oh yes. Clive Owen. Fell back into love with Paul Blackthorne. And lately I've been jonesing for anything with Alexis Denisof. When will Much Ado About Nothing be out on DVD????

33. How many one-night stands?
None. Second base with a firefighter. Blah.

34. What was your favorite TV program?
Supernatural, natch. New shows include Arrow and a late-coming to the zombie world with The Walking Dead.

35. Do you hate anyone now that you didn't hate this time last year?
I don't hate, per se. Disdain, anger, pity, or sometimes absolutely nothing - complete numbness. Hate takes too much energy.

36. What was the best book you read?
I read crap all year. I attempted On The Origin of Species. I have the latest Dresen Files book on my night stand - that's good, right?

37. What was your greatest musical discovery?
Not a discovery of music, but an interesting exercise of the Six Degrees of Separation, involving a co-worker and a fairly famous Atlantic Canadian band. Long story short, I discovered I am three degrees of separation from Russell Crowe.

38. What did you want and get?
Tablet, I guess.

39. What was your favorite film of this year?
The only movies of 2012 I saw were 'Magic Mike' (in the theatre) and 'Resident Evil: Retribution', on pay-per-view. I am sure neither would have been at the top of my list.

40. What did you do on your birthday, and how old were you?
I turned 43 (that makes the second base with the 27 year old firefighter seem spectacular, doesn't it?) and for the life of me I don't remember what I did. Probably worked or got the shift off, which, if I did get it off, I slept.

41. What would have made your year immeasurably more satisfying?
An out-of-the-blue call from Crush or Crush 2. Vegas hook-up with Crush.

42. How would you describe your personal fashion concept in 2012?
Wearing Yoga pants in public is less humiliating than wearing sweat pants. I went for comfort.

43. What kept you sane?
Mostly Effexor XR and Wellbutrin XL. Clive Owen. TV.

44. Which celebrity/public figure did you fancy the most?
If I haven't hinted at it enough so far, Clive Owen, Paul Blackthorne and Alexis Denisof. And, as usual, Jensen Ackles as Dean Winchester.

45. What concerts/shows did you go to?
NOT
A
SINGLE
ONE.

46. Did you see any live sporting events?
Unless you count watching First Year Residents trying to make it through morning rounds in one piece, then no, not a one. As for real sports, I don't like any.

47. What political issue stirred you the most?
Watching the near self-immolation of the Americans with their election.

48. What has been your favorite moment?
Knowing that if I'd had my own hotel room the firefighter would have gotten past second base.

49. What was your best month?
July. For no good reason other than it is the first month that came to mind.

50. Who was the best new person you met?
Our new Paediatric General Surgery Fellow. Once he let himself relax around us he started fitting in with our merry little clique. It will be hard, 18 months from now, when he finishes the program and, most likely, moves back to LA.

51. Who did you miss?
No one and everyone not hear with me. Crush 2, specifically. Every now and again one of the two spoken word tracks from his group's CD pops up on my iPod and his voice gives me the shivers. I am a sucker for a great accent.

52. Overall, how would you rate this year from 1-10?
5

53. Tell us a valuable life lesson you learned in 2012:
Everybody lies. Everybody will make things as painful and difficult as they can and only pay lipservice to the concept of 'working together'. That I still wear my heart on my sleeve and can't fix everything even when right is on my side.

54. What's something you learned about yourself?
Power means nothing if no one respects you or what you do.

55. Quote a song lyric that sums up your year:
Have a whole song:

Vienna

Slow down you crazy child
You're so ambitious for a juvenile
But then if you're so smart tell me why
Are you still so afraid?
Where's the fire, what's the hurry about?
You better cool it off before you burn it out
You got so much to do and only
So many hours in a day

But you know that when the truth is told
That you can get what you want
Or you can just get old
You're gonna kick off before you even get halfway through
When will you realize...Vienna waits for you

Slow down you're doing fine
You can't be everything you want to be
Before your time
Although it's so romantic on the borderline tonight (tonight)
Too bad but it's the life you lead
You're so ahead of yourself
That you forgot what you need
Though you can see when you're wrong
You know you can't always see when you're right(you're right)

You got your passion you got your pride
But don't you know that only fools are satisfied?
Dream on but don't imagine they'll all come true
When will you realize
Vienna waits for you

Slow down you crazy child
Take the phone off the hook and disappear for a while
It's alright you can afford to lose a day or two
When will you realize...
Vienna waits for you.

And you know that when the truth is told
That you can get what you want
Or you can just get old
You're gonna kick off before you even get halfway through

Why don't you realize...Vienna waits for you
When will you realize...Vienna waits for you

Poor Visa Card...

2012-12-14T14:17:41Z

One should never shop when one is emotional.

One winds up with a bruised Visa card and an iPad 2.

One became emotional because one of my cats, Gosia, passed away suddenly. She was one of two of my kitties that lived with my parents. She was my father's favourite. She went to settle to sleep on the foot of his bed and a half hour later she was gone. I had always planned to have my pets cremated so that I could have them with me after they died. But my father didn't want that and he buried her in the back yard..

Urgh

2012-11-13T21:24:17Z

Today is the first time in a very looooooooong while that I have worn tights.

I now remember why I hated wearing them.

Never again!!!!!

Blast from the past. Ish.

2012-11-09T20:21:10Z

Best played with the volume on LOUD! This song popped into my mind a couple of weeks ago and is included in Great Big Sea's XX collection...

Joss for Prez 2016

2012-10-29T14:38:07Z

http://www.youtube.com/watch?feature=player_embedded&v=6TiXUF9xbTo

Me, much?

2012-10-25T16:07:10Z

http://www.eclecticenergies.com/enneagram/type1.php

Enneagram Type 1 - The Reformer

Perfectionists, responsible, fixated on improvement

Enneagram type 1 - The ReformerPeople of this personality type are essentially looking to make things better, as they think nothing is ever quite good enough. This makes them perfectionists who desire to reform and improve; idealists who strive to make order out of the omnipresent chaos.

Ones have a fine eye for detail. They are always aware of the flaws in themselves, others and the situations in which they find themselves. This triggers their need to improve, which can be beneficial for all concerned, but which can also prove to be burdensome to both the One and those who are on the receiving end of the One's reform efforts.

The One's inability to achieve the perfection they desire feeds their feelings of guilt for having fallen short, and fuels their incipient anger against an imperfect world. Ones, however, tend to feel guilty about their anger. Anger is a "bad" emotion, and Ones strive sincerely and wholeheartedly to be "good." Anger is therefore vigorously repressed from consciousness, bursting forth in occasional fits of temper, but usually manifesting in one of its many less obvious permutations - impatience, frustration, annoyance and judgmental criticality. For this reason, Ones can be difficult to live with, but, on the high side, they tend to be loyal, responsible and capable partners and friends.

Ones are serious people; they tend to be highly principled, competent and uncompromising. They follow the rules and expect others to do so as well. Because they believe so thoroughly in their convictions, they are often excellent leaders who can inspire those who follow them with their own vision of excellence. Reform movements are frequently spearheaded by Ones.

Ones are often driven and ambitious, and are sometimes workaholics. But whatever their professional involvement, they are definitely active, practical people who get things done. They are natural born organizers, listmakers who finish everything on the list, the last one to leave the office, the first one to return, industrious, reliable, honest and dutiful.

The relentlessness of their pursuit of the ideal can make Ones tense people who have a hard time relaxing and who unnecessarily deny themselves many of the harmless pleasures of life. They tend to be emotionally repressed and uncomfortable with expressing tender feelings; they generally see emotionality as a sign of weakness and lack of control. They are seldom spontaneous. They have multiple interests and talents however; they are self-reliant and seldom run out of things to do.

Ones are often intelligent and independent and can easily mistake themselves for Fives, but unlike Fives, Ones are primarily people of action, not thought. Ones tend to worry and are prone to anxiety and can sometimes mistype as Sixes, but they are far less affiliative than Sixes and their standards are not reached by seeking consensus with a group. Finally, the relentless pursuit of perfection can take its toll and lead to depression. At such times, a One can mistype as a Four. But Fours have a tendency towards self-indulgence whereas Ones are self-denying. Fours are emotionally expressive; Ones are emotionally constrained.

Well...

2012-09-26T14:43:59Z

Justin Trudeau to Announce Liberal Leadership Run

About fricken time.

Thank you, crackers4jenn!

2012-09-17T19:40:12Z

For the cute li'l roley-poley panda :) Panda brightened my day!

Because I hardly get any comments anymore... :( {And it was scavenged from the F-list}

2012-09-09T17:17:36Z

1. Tell you why I friended you. If I remember.
2. Associate you with something.
3. Tell you something I like about you.
4. Tell you a memory I have of you.
5. Associate you with a character/pairing.
6. Ask something I've always wanted to know about you.
7. Tell you my favorite userpic of yours.
8. Tell you that you must post this in your own journal.

Ta-DAAAAAAAAA! AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAND... GO!

Oh dear...

2012-08-31T23:18:52Z

I just watched the 'Unrated' version of Derailed starring the pretty Clive Owen and the ex-Mrs. Brad Pitt.

Oh my frak it sucked. So, so badly sucked. I liked the ending though, not just because it was the ending, but because it was a decent resolution to the... erm, story, I guess you'd call it... and Clive's character stopped acting like a pussy.

Off to the dvd archives with the disc...

Meme-age Copied from crackers4jenn

2012-08-20T21:12:31Z

Because, you know, there is nothing more worthwhile on ElJay than to poke fandom in the eye :)

Pick 5 TV shows you love before reading the questions:

1 - Supernatural
2 - 24
3 - Buffy the Vampire Slayer (most seasons)
4 - Twin Peaks
5 - The X Files

Who is your favorite character in 2? (24)

Duh, Jack Bauer, of course. The guy had the crappiest luck of anyone in the world, and most of the people he worked with were either double agents or, well, died on him, but he kept saving the day.

Who is your least favorite character in 1? (SPN)

It's a close tie between John and Lucifer, but I gotta go with Lucy. That whole arc took WAAAAAAAAY too long to resolve, and I found Lucifer more annoying than menacing. I don't have much love for The Trickster/Gabriel, but the eps he appeared in are some of my favourites in the series.

What is your favorite episode of 4? (Twin Peaks)

Whichever episode contained the arrival and introduction of Special Agent Rosenfield. LOVED HIM!

What is your favorite series of 5? (XF)

Assuming that means 'season' and not 'series', it would be Season Five. The Post-Modern Prometheus and Bad Blood are classics, the former being shot in beautiful black-and-white and the latter showcasing the snap humour of the writers and the excellent delivery of the dialog by the actors. I love the end of Bad Blood, where Skinner has had to sit through the dual tellings of the Texas case, his face fixed with the most bewildered look. Season Five also has the Scully-centric Chinga, a huge YAY, and Travellers, with a young Mulder digging up the first Fed to crack an X-File, while sporting a wedding band that jolted the fen into mad discussion of Mulder's past.

What's your favorite relationship in 3? (BtVS)

Easy peasy. Spike and Drusilla. No other romantic relationship in the series was as loving, brutal and honest as theirs, which was as close to a forever union as anyone got in that series.

Who is your anti-relationship in 2? (24)

Jack + ANYBODY. It never works out and it drags the storyline down.

How long have you watched 1? (SPN)

I think I got the first few seasons on DVD sometime when the third season was on the air. I watched those dvds on my days off from work, like, 4-6 eps/day.

How did you become interested in 3? (BtVS)

There was literally NOTHING on one evening, and I stumbled across a re-run of Hallowe'en. Spike was the character who sucked (no pun intended) into the ep and eventually into the whole series.

Who is your favorite actor in 4? (Twin Peaks)

Dale Cooper, natch. Though he found himself in a quirky town, surrounded by weirdness and curtain rods, he himself was an oddity, one from an assumed logical and regimented organization. Amazingly enough, it is only Special Agent Rosenfield that acts like someone from the non-magical world, as the FBI is portrayed as a different flavour of quirky.

Which do you prefer, 1, 2, or 5?

I have to choose??

Well, with all things being equal regarding acting talent, writing, continuity and imagination, I gotta go with Supernatural. Roger Ebert said that a great movie contains three good scenes and no bad ones, and SPN has the fewest crimes against violating its own history and the thematic arc that stretched through the first five seasons. I have to say that the only sign of retconning I've found in the show is the bastardization of John Winchester: since he died he has been painted as more than a derelict dad with an obsession, with references to physical and emotional abuse of the boys on top of his long absences from the two people he should care about protecting the most.

Which show have you seen more episodes of, 1 or 3?

Well, I've seen every ep in every season of both shows, but as SPN had a full complement of episodes in its first season and has made it to Season Eight, I guess it is SPN for the win.

If you could be anyone from 4, who would you be? (Twin Peaks)

NO ONE! Not one character got a happy ending and poor Sherriff Truman is probably still sitting on that log...

How would you kill off your favorite character from 5? (XF)

Autoerotic Axphyxiation. It would be canon-consistent, too ;)

Would a 3/4 crossover work? (BtVS/Twin Peaks)

Um. No. I could write a more plausible cross-over of BtVS with Little House on the Prairie than consider one with Twin Peaks.

Overall, which show has a better cast, 3 or 5? (BtVS/XF)

For acting chops I have to go with The X Files. Not one actor did not improve and then excel in their role as the series progressed as those of XF. Many on BtVS got a handle on how to 'be' their characters, but were at times seen to be 'going through the motions'. It didn't help, either, that the folks of BtVS had the hard task of selling the many, many instances of out-of-character-ness that occurred through the seven seasons. You know what I'm talking about.

Which has the better music, 2 or 4? (24/Twin Peaks).

Twin Peaks. The music was integral to setting the emotional flavour of the show, whereas the score that accompanied 24 blended in with the background, as it were, making no impact to the experience of watching the ep. BUT, if we were talking sound, then 24 all the way. That damn ticking clock did more to set the tone than any music, especially during the tragic moments, when the hour would turn over in eerie silence.

::wibble::

2012-05-30T19:25:30Z

SOMETHING is making me emotional as hell today. Overtiredness? PMS?? Exhausting whirl-windy Vegas wedding weekend (no, I didn't get married)??? Yesterday's all-day Union meeting Extravaganza at work - on 4 hours sleep post flight drama????

Whatever it is I have been on the verge of a nervous breakdown all day. Even cranking the iTunes, when it hit on the songs from Once More With Feeling I was in tears (I think I was in HEAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA-VEN!).

Trying to clean, do laundry and snap out of the funk.

Funk is winning.

Been A Long Time...

2012-05-23T14:46:08Z

... since I meme'd. Being non-American I am not sure how accurate the result is, but it will do.

My Liberal Identity

You are a Peace Patroller, also known as an anti-war liberal or neo-hippie. You believe in putting an end to American imperial conquest, stopping wars that have already been lost, and supporting our troops by bringing them home.

Take the quiz at
About.com Political Humor