Devyn's Den

Round #26; Something Wicked This Way Comes - Cooger & Dark's Pandemonium Shadow Show

2014-05-23T06:40:59Z

Fandom: Something wicked This Way Comes
Subject: Cooger & Dark's Pandemonium Shadow Show
Title: All The Devils
Warnings/Notes: Gratuitous use of circus-esque music, some swearing.

Something Wicked This Way Comes is the story of two boys against a centuries (maybe even millennia) old carnival that feeds on fears and darkness, and people who are only too eager to give up their selves for a chance to ride on the carnival's magical carousel, which can return someone old to youth or age up a young person (but more often, you only end up one of the sideshow acts). This is a mix for that carnival.

“The red-lettered sign said: OUT OF ORDER! KEEP OFF!
‘Sign’s been up all day. I don’t believe signs,’ said Jim.
They peered in at the merry-go-round which lay under a dry rattle and roar of wind-tumbled oak trees. Its horses, goats, antelopes, zebras, speared through their spines with brass javelins, hung contorted as in a death rictus, asking mercy with their fright-colored eyes, seeking revenge with their panic-colored teeth.”

“They both heard the music blowing through the front door with the smell of fresh rain and ancient grass. The carousel calliope, among the hills, piping the ‘Funeral March’ backwards.”

“Maybe the carousel wasn’t fixed right. Maybe accidents happen all the time. Like to the lightning-rod man, him inside-out and crazy. Maybe the carnival likes accidents, gets a kick out of them. Or maybe they did something to her on purpose.”

“‘1860. 1846. Same ad. Same names. Same initials. Dark and Cooger, Cooger and Dark, they came and went, but only once every twenty, thirty, forty years, so people forgot. Where were they all the other years? Traveling. And more than traveling. Always in October: October 1846, October 1860, October 1888, October 1910, and October now, tonight.’ His voice trailed off. ‘...Beware the autumn people...’”

“‘The stuff of nightmare is their plain bread. They butter it with pain. They set their clocks by deathwatch beetles, and thrive the centuries.They were the men with the leather-ribbon whips who sweated up the Pyramids seasoning it with other people’s salt and other people’s cracked hearts. They coursed Europe on the White Horses of the Plague. They whispered to Caesar that he was mortal, then sold daggers at half-price in the grand March sale....The train put wheels under them and here they run down the long road out of the Gothic and baroque; look at their wagons and coaches, the carving like medieval shrines, all of it stuff once drawn by horses, mules, or, maybe, men.’”

American Carny Theme - Murder By Death
~instrumental~

Circus Apocalypse - Vermillion Lies
Come down and join the circus,
it’s the end of the line.
You could fall off the high-wire
or feed yourself to the lions.
There’s no audition
to get into the show.
All that we ask for
is your immortal soul.

Kiss of Hades - Inkubus Sukkubus
The lost souls line the concrete wall.
Their blank eyes of death, they tell it all.
Of shattered dreams and ruined lives,
a dream away is paradise.
Come and take the kiss of Hades,
all you gents and all you ladies.

Mama - My Chemical Romance
She said: “You ain’t no son of mine
for what you’ve done they’re gonna find
a place for you. And just you mind
your manners when you go.
And when you go, don’t return to me, my love.”
That’s right.
...
We’re damned after all,
through fortune and flame we fall.
And if you can stay
then I’ll show you the way
to return from the ashes you call.

Hell Is Empty - Emilie Autumn
Hell is empty
and all the devils
are here!

Carousel - Circus Contraption
~instrumental~

Prelude 12/21 - AFI
This is what I brought you, this you can keep,
this is what I brought, you may forget me.
I promise to depart, just promise one thing:
 Kiss my eyes and lay me to sleep.

Sally’s Song (cover) - London After Midnight
I sense there’s something in the wind
that feels like tragedy’s at hand.
And though I’d like to stand by him,
can’t shake this feeling that I have:
the worst is just around the bend.
...
What will become of my dear friend?
Where will his actions lead us, then?
Although I’d like to join the crowd
in their enthusiastic cloud,
try as I may it doesn’t last.

Demons - Imagine Dragons
At the curtain’s call, it’s the last of all.
When the lights fade out, all the sinners crawl.
So they dug your grave and the masquerade
will come calling out at the mess you made.
Don’t wanna let you down, but I am hell bound.
Though this is all for you, don’t wanna hide the truth.
No matter what we breed, we still are made of greed,
this is my kingdom come, this is my kingdom come.

Carnival - Shovels & Rope
Carnival, lull me to sleep.
No one can hear our voices.
I can tell your future and past
by the light of the carousel horses.
Across the world I wander,
my moments made from years.
On a still and silent midway,
I wait for you to reappear.

Funeral March (Reversed) - Chopin
~instrumental~

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Round #24; Adventure Time - Marceline/Princess Bubblegum

2014-03-21T07:16:51Z

Fandom:Adventure Time
Subject:Marceline/Princess Bubblegum
Title:Strangeness and Charm
Warnings/Notes:I didn’t really ship this until the one of the latest issues of the comic (#25). I could see it in the show before and kind of shipped it in an offhand, yeah they’d be cute together, way. Now I ship it like it's my job, and I have ALL the feels. The comics aren’t, strictly speaking, canon, but this mix borrows pretty heavily from the backstory given in issue #25 as well as from the show.

(if you want to read the issue of the comic I used, part 1, part 2, and part 3 can be read in scanned form on tumblr. you can read and understand it without having seen Adventure Time, but you should know that Ricardio is a recurring villain voiced by George Takei. also he's the Ice King's heart, but that's not as important)

Marceline Abadeer is the rockstar daughter of the demon king, and vampire queen in her own right. (Princess) Bonnibel Bubblegum is the self-made princess, creator, and sole ruler of the Candy Kingdom in the Land of Ooo. But before either of them grew into these roles, they were just Marcy and Bonni, best friends (and maybe more) in the strange, post-apocalyptic world that existed after the Great Mushroom War. Marceline had dreams of becoming a world famous musician, while Bonni preferred science and creating things.

They drifted apart (and occasionally back together) as Marceline pursued her rockstar dreams and Bonni built herself a kingdom and inhabitants to rule. In the end, Marceline left her home in the Land of Ooo to get away from it all for a while. It’s unclear how long she was gone, but I’m willing to bet decades or even centuries (they’re both effectively immortal) went by before she came back to Ooo. It took some time, but they rekindled their friendship (*cough*romance*cough*), because, after all, they work better together than they do alone. They always have.

Structurally, this sort of alternates POVs, Marcy then Bonni and so on, with the last song being both POVs. I hope you enjoy!

Use Somebody (Kings of Leon cover) - Paramore
I’ve been roaming around
always looking down at all I see.
Painted faces fill the places I can’t reach.
You know that I could use somebody.
You know that I could use somebody.
Someone like you, and all you know, and how you speak.
Countless lovers under cover of the street.
You know that I could use somebody.

Strangeness and Charm - Florence + the Machine
An atom to atom, oh, can you feel it on me love?
A pattern to pattern, oh, can you see it on me love?
Atom to atom, oh, what’s the matter with me love?
Strangeness and charm.
The static of your arms, it is the catalyst.
You’re a chemical that burns, there is nothing like this.
It’s the purest element, but it’s so volatile.
An equation heaven sent, a drug for angels.

Science & Faith - The Script
You won’t find faith or hope down a telescope,
you won’t find heart and soul in the stars.
You can break everything down to chemicals,
but you can’t explain a love like ours.

The Calculation - Regina Spektor
So we made our own computer out of macaroni pieces
and it did our thinking while we lived our lives.
It counted up our feelings and divided them up even,
and it called our calculation perfect love.
Didn’t even know
that love was bigger.
Didn’t even know
that love was so, so, hey, hey, hey.

Someday - Tegan & Sara
So speak up, this is your last chance my friend.
Roll the windows down and take me in.
Reach out, say what you’re really about.
Are you coming here or not, are you coming out?
Might paint something I might want to hang here someday.
Might write something I want to say to you someday.
 Might do something I’d be proud of someday.
Mark my words, I might be something someday.

The Writer - Ellie Goulding
Sat on your sofa, it’s all broken springs.
This isn’t the place for these violin strings.
Oh, I try out a smile, and I aim it at you.
Oh, but you must have missed it, you always do.
...
Why don’t you be the writer,
and decide the words I say?
‘Cause I’d rather pretend
I’ll still be there at the end.
Only it’s too hard to ask;
won’t you try to help me?

Stereo Hearts vs. We Are Never Ever Getting Back Together - Gym Class Heroes & Taylor Swift
I only pray you’ll never leave me behind (never leave me)
I used to say, never say never
I take your head and hold it closer to mine (yeah)
Thought love was dead, (we’re never getting back together) but now you’re changing my mind
We are never, ever, ever, (it beats for you so listen close) getting back together
We are never, ever, ever, getting back together
you go talk to your friends, talk to my friends, talk to me
but we (this melody was meant for you)
are never, ever, ever, (so sing along to my stereo) getting back together
we (to my stereo)

Radioactive - Marina & the Diamonds
In the night your heart is full and by the morning empty.
But baby, I’m the one who left you, you’re not the one who left me.
When you’re around me, I’m radioactive.
My blood is burning, radioactive.
I’m turning radioactive, my blood is radioactive.
My heart is nuclear, love is all I fear.
Ready to be let down, now I’m heading for a meltdown.

Cups (When I’m Gone)(radio version) - Anna Kendrick
I’ve got my ticket for the long way ‘round,
the one with the prettiest of views.
It’s got mountains, it’s got rivers,
it’s got sights to give you shivers,
but it sure would be prettier with you.
When I’m gone, when I’m gone,
you’re gonna miss me when I’m gone.
You’re gonna miss me by my walk,
you’re gonna miss me by my talk, oh,
you’re gonna miss me when I’m gone.

The World We Live In - The Killers
Well maybe I was mistaken,
I heard a rumor that
you quit this day and age.
Well maybe I was mistaken.
Bless your body, bless your soul,
pray for peace and self control.
...
This is the world that we live in;
I still want something real.
This is the world that we live in;
I know that we can heal over time.

I’m Just Your Problem (cover) - Elena Íviel Berciano feat. Nicole Vaquerano
Sorry I don’t treat you like a goddess,
is that what you want me to do?
Sorry I don’t treat you like you’re perfect,
like all your little loyal subjects do.
Sorry I’m not made of sugar,
am I not sweet enough for you?
Is that why you always avoid me?
That must be such an inconvenience to you.
...
It’s like I’m not even a person, am I?
I’m just your problem.

True Love - P!nk feat. Lily Allen
Just once try to wrap your
little brain around my feelings.
Just once, please try not to be so mean.
Repeat after me now, R-O-M-A-N-C-E-E-E,
come on, I’ll say it slowly (romance),
you can do it baby.
...
Why do you rub me up the wrong way?
Why do you say the things that you say?
Sometimes I wonder how we ever came to be,
but without you I’m incomplete
...
True love, true love,
it must be true love,
and no one else can break my heart like you.

ss

Round #23; Adventure Time - Simon Petrikov (Ice King)

2014-02-21T06:10:47Z

Fandom: Adventure Time
Subject: Simon Petrikov (Ice King)
Title: Cold Amnesia
Warnings/Notes: Warning for memory loss/similarities to Alzheimer's. I have a lot of Ice King feelings. He's...not a likable character, but you can definitely feel for him and his tragic backstory, even while you condemn his princess-kidnapping ways.

The Ice King is the former main antagonist (now mostly annoyance) in Adventure Time. He’s obsessed with finding a princess to love him, and constantly kidnaps princesses (though he sees it as ‘rescuing’ them from their boring princess duties). But, before the Mushroom War, he was a human named Simon Petrikov, who worked in antiquities. At the time he also had a fiancee, named Betty, whom he called his ‘princess’ and loved dearly. At some point in his career he bought a strange crown from a dock worker in Scandinavia; this crown was his downfall. He put it on to make Betty laugh, but instead it caused him to black out and have strange visions. When he awoke, he couldn’t remember what he had done, but Betty soon left. Simon never saw her again.

In the aftermath of the Mushroom War, in a world decimated by nuclear destruction and filled with irradiated mutants, Simon wandered, lost. He found Marceline (not yet the Vampire Queen) as a young girl and took care of her until he lost himself and his memories completely to the crown and its madness.

This mix picks up directly after the Mushroom War, with Simon wandering the world. The first half chronicles his travels with Marceline and descent into madness. The second half is done as more of a character study of Simon as the Ice King, his loneliness and self-hatred over the thousand years of his existence, and his desire for a princess to love him (his princess, though he no longer truly remembers Betty as a person).

(if you really want to have some Ice King feels, watch the episode Simon & Marcy; it really gives a good overview of Simon/Ice King, and you’ll never hear the theme song to Cheers the same way again)

“And that's when it started... the visions. I fought with them, shouted at them until I realized it wasn't real, it was the crown! I quickly took it off, and saw my fiancee in front of me, looking at me with such contempt! What had I said? What had I done when I wore this crown?”

Radioactive - Imagine Dragons
I’m waking up to ash and dust.
I wipe my brow and I sweat my rust.
I’m breathing in the chemicals.
I’m breaking in, shaping up,
then checking out on the prison bus.
This is it, the apocalypse.
....
Welcome to the new age, to the new age,
I’m radioactive, radioactive.

The Sun - Maroon 5
And I cannot remember
what life was like through photographs.
Trying to recreate images
life gives us from our past.
And sometimes it’s a sad song.
But I cannot forget, refuse to regret,
so glad I met you.
Take my breath away, make everyday
worth all of the pain that I’ve gone through.
And mama, I’ve been crying
cuz things ain’t how they used to be.
She said the battles almost won,
and we’re only several miles from the sun.

Chicago (Acoustic) - Sufjan Stevens
If I was crying
in the van with my friend,
it was for freedom,
from myself and from the land.
I made a lot of mistakes,
I made a lot of mistakes,
I made a lot of mistakes,
I made a lot of mistakes.

Pagan Angel and a Borrowed Car - Iron & Wine
Every morning there were planes
the shiny blades of pagan angels in our father’s skies.
Every evening I would watch her hold the pillow
tight against her hollows, her unholy child.
I was still a beggar shaking out my stolen coat
among the angry cemetery leaves.
When they caught the king beneath the borrowed car,
righteous, drunk, and fumbling for the royal keys.

Thriller (Michael Jackson cover) - Imogen Heap
Cuz this is thriller, thriller night;
there ain’t no second chance against the thing with forty eyes, girl.
Thriller, thriller night,
you’re fighting for your life inside of killer, thriller tonight.

“I know my mind is changing... but I'm already gone too far to know what to do. I want people to know that... if I do things that... if I do things that hurt anyone, please, please forgive me.”

Kryptonite - 3 Doors Down
If I go crazy then
will you still call me Superman?
If I’m alive and well, will
you be there, holding my hand?
I’ll keep you by my side
with my superhuman might,
Kryptonite.

Remember You (Adventure Time demo) - Rebecca Sugar
Marceline,
I can feel myself slipping away.
I can’t remember what it made me say.
But I remember that I saw you frown;
I swear it wasn’t me, it was the crown.
This magic keeps me alive,
but it’s making me crazy.
And I need to save you,
but who’s going to save me?
Please forgive me for whatever I do
when I don’t remember you.

C’Mon - Panic! At The Disco & fun.
If I should die tonight
may I first just say I’m sorry,
for I, never felt like anybody.
I am a man of many hats although I
never mastered anything.
When I am ten feet tall,
I never felt much smaller, since the fall.
Nobody seems to know my name.
So don’t leave me to sleep all alone,
may we stay lost on our way home?

“Since then, I see the visions always whether or not I wear the crown. They tell me the secrets... the secrets of the ice and snow... that the power of the crown will save me with its frost. I don't yet know what this means. As you can see, my skin is beginning to turn blue. My body temperature has been lowering at a supernatural rate, to what is now about 30°C. I don't know when it will end... I'm really scared...”

Sleep - My Chemical Romance
A drink for the horror that I’m in.
For the good guys and the bad guys,
for the monsters that I’ve been.
Three cheers for tyranny,
unapologetic apathy,
cuz there ain’t no way that I’m coming back again.
And through it all
how could you cry for me?
Cuz I don’t feel bad about it.
So shut your eyes,
kiss me goodbye,
and sleep.
Just sleep.
The hardest part
is the awful things that
I’ve seen.

“Because when you have stanky old Wizard Eyes, sometimes you see things that are real, and other times it's like crazy, crazy, crazy, in your face, all the time.”

Once Upon A Dream - Lana Del Rey
I know you,
I walked with you once upon a dream.
I know you,
that look in your eyes is so familiar a gleam.

“J. T. Dawgzone always says, 'Ladies are drawn to bros. with tortured pasts.' And I've got a way tortured past! I think. I don't really . . . re . . . hmm.”

Hello - Lionel Richie
I’ve been alone with you inside my mind.
And in my dreams I’ve kissed your lips a thousand times.
I sometimes see you pass outside my door.
Hello,
is it me you’re looking for?

All The Pretty Girls - fun.
All the pretty girls on a Saturday night,
let it be, you’ll come to me with the look in your eyes.
Will you break and take all the words from my mouth?
I wish all the pretty girls were shaking me down.
But not you,
you still wear boots and your hair is too long.
And then this one doesn’t want to admit she’s fallen in love.
Oh, c’mon, c’mon, what’s a boy to do
when all the pretty girls can’t measure to you?

“I just wanted to be loved!”

Oh, Bubblegum (Princess Song) - Ice King
Oh, Bubblegum,
I really need someone.
Or anyone, pretty much anyone.
I’m so alone,
won’t somebody tell me what’s wrong with me?
Anybody?
Anybody?
Anybody?!

Jesus Christ - Brand New
Do you believe you’re missing out,
that everything good is happening somewhere else?
But with nobody in your bed,
the night’s hard to get through.
And I will die all alone.
And when I arrive I won’t know anyone.

“Just watch over me until I can find my way out of this labyrinth in my brain and regain my sanity. And then maybe Betty, my princess... maybe you will love me again. Please love me again, Betty!”

Jar of Hearts - Christina Perri
I know I can’t take one more step towards you,
cuz all that’s waiting is regret.
Don’t you know I’m not your ghost anymore?
You lost the love I loved the most.
I learned to live half alive,
and now you want me one more time.
...
You’re gonna catch a cold
from the ice inside your soul.

Nearly Witches (Ever Since We Met...) - Panic! At The Disco
You have set your heart on haunting me forever
from the start, it’s never silent.
Ever since we met,
I only shoot up with your perfume.
It’s the only thing
that makes me feel as good as you do.
Ever since we met,
I’ve got just one regret to live through,
and that one regret is you.

Age of Ice - Thao & the Get Down Stay Down
Takes a fine imagination
and a sound technology
to let loose the cold amnesia
over all the blood that beats.
Slowly we all lay down.
...
Upon my return from the age of ice
I supposed I would survive.

“Ugh, I'm so tired of looking at this face.”

Every Night - Imagine Dragons
Searching to find myself
but all I find is you.
I can hardly stand myself,
so what am I to you?
...
Cuz the reason that I’m here
is the same through all these years,
not changing, not changing
anything at all.

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Round #22; Sailor Moon - Sailor Moon & Sailor Galaxia

2014-01-22T05:49:56Z

Fandom: Sailor Moon
Subject: Sailor Moon & Sailor Galaxia
Title: Don't Call This Love
Warnings/Notes: I've been having a lot of Sailor Moon feelings lately, ok? Don't judge me. Major spoilers for the final arc of the Sailor Moon manga; potentially implied suicide (depends on how you view the character death, I guess; warning for that, too)?

This mix is for the enemies-to-maybe-comrades relationship between Sailor Moon and Sailor Galaxia in the manga (not the anime, whole different beast of a relationship, there). Throughout the storyline (well, once they finally meet, anyway), Sailor Moon seems to feel much more sympathy towards Galaxia than she does towards Sailor Moon, so I tried to reflect those disparate views of each other in this mix. To do this, it alternates between Sailor Moon and Sailor Galaxia's POVs, with each song serving as a response to the previous one.

Sailor Galaxia is the main antagonist of the final arc of Sailor Moon. She was born on a planet she referred to as ‘trash’ and wandered miserably alone until she discovered she had the powers of a Sailor Senshi. That wasn’t enough for her, though: she desired to have the strongest power in the galaxy and left her home planet to find a way to gain that power. She eventually found her way to the Galaxy Cauldron, from where all Star Seeds (crystals contained in all of life, and from which Senshi get their power) come and built an empire there. To gain more power, she took (or had her underlings take) the Star Seeds from other Sailor Senshi, seeing them as weak and unworthy in comparison to herself.

However, she knew she was being used by a being known as Chaos, so she planned to manipulate Sailor Moon (for whom she felt nothing but contempt) into destroying Chaos for her, immolating them both (Sailor Moon and Chaos) in the process and leaving Sailor Galaxia to be the most powerful Senshi in the universe. This plan backfired, however, and Chaos attempted to throw Galaxia into the Galaxy Cauldron, which would have destroyed her if Sailor Moon had not rescued her. In the face of Sailor Moon’s purity, hope, and love Galaxia lost her will to fight, but gave Sailor Moon a final burst of hope with which to fight Chaos before being destroyed for good, herself.

We Are - Ana Johnsson
Sailor Moon
One step forward making two steps back (my oh my)
Riding piggy on the bad boy’s back for life.
Lining up for the grand illusion,
no answers for no questions asked.
Lining up for the execution
without knowing why.
...
You wash your hands and come out clean
but fail to recognize the enemies within.
You say we’re not responsible
but we are, we are.

Gravity - The Dresden Dolls
Sailor Galaxia
Gravity works slowly if you notice it at all.
Some of us are getting mighty lucky (aren’t we?)
If you had to live with this you’d rather lie than fall.
You think I can’t fly? Well you just watch me.

Bleeding Out - Imagine Dragons
When the hour is nigh
and hopelessness is sinking in,
and the wolves all cry
to fill the night with hollering.
When your eyes are red
and emptiness is all you know,
with the darkness fed
I will be your scarecrow.
...
Cuz I’m bleeding out,
so if the last thing that I do
is to bring you down
I’ll bleed out for you.
So I bare my skin and I count my sins
and I close my eyes and I take it in,
and I’m bleeding out, I’m bleeding out for you, for you.

Creeper (Coming For You) - Jakalope
Oh, I’m playing you for a fool,
you fell for every broken rule.
I’m doing what I owe to you.
It’s been a long time coming
and I’m coming for you.
While I,
silently I scream,
inside I barely breathe.
Silently I scream.

This Is Where We Are - Ravens and Chimes
Did you build walls up,
did you build them up all around you,
to keep you from,
to keep you from the howling wind?
And to each one seeking the words that they need,
I’ll stand beside you now.
And to each one listening to wind in the trees,
my voice behind you now.
And I can see she’s one of us
in how I stand beside you now.
This is where we are.
This is where we are.
Don’t be frightened.

Everybody’s Fool - Evanescence
Look, here she comes now.
Bow down and stare in wonder.
Oh, how we love you,
too bad we didn’t know she
never was and never will be.
You don’t know how you’ve betrayed me,
and somehow you’ve got everybody fooled.
...
You’re not real and you can’t save me.

The Great Escape - P!nk
I can understand how, when the edges are rough,
and they cut you like the tiny slivers of glass,
and you feel too much,
and you don’t know how long you’re gonna last.
But everyone you know, is trying to smooth it over,
find a way to make the hurt go away.
But everyone you know, is trying to smooth it over,
like you’re trying to scream underwater.
But I won’t let you make the great escape.
I’m never gonna watch you checking out of this place.

My Skin - Natalie Merchant
Take a look at my body,
look at my hands.
There’s so much here
that I don’t understand.
Your face-saving promises,
whispered like prayers,
I don’t need them.
I’ve been treated so wrong,
I’ve been treated so long
as if I’m becoming untouchable.
Contempt loves the silence,
it thrives in the dark,
with fine winding tendrils
that strangle the heart.
They say that promises
sweeten the blow,
but I don’t need them.

Tragedy - Christina Perri
If you could envision
the meaning of a tragedy.
You might be
surprised to hear it’s you and me.
But when it comes down to it
you never made the most of it.
So I cried, cried, cried,
and now I say goodbye.
And I won’t be made a fool of...
don’t call this love.

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Round #21; for philstar22; Tolkien - Races of Middle Earth

2013-12-30T21:55:38Z

Fandom: Tolkienverse
Subject: the races of Middle Earth
Title: Here There Be Dragons
Warnings/Notes: I'm sorry this is so late (it can be a New Year's present?)! For philstar22, who requested a mix for the various races of Middle Earth! I wasn't sure if you preferred movie-verse or book-verse for this, so I tried to toe the line between the two. Warnings for some language and a rather long (and eclectic) mix. (and despite the title, there is a sad lack of dragons in this mix; sorry about that)

As much as I wanted to try and include all the possible races of Middle Earth in this mix, that would have been way too long (it's long enough as it is). So instead, I went with a small, but wide-ranging, selection: Elves, Orcs, Dwarves, Ents, Hobbits, and Men. I tried to capture the feel of the different races in the music as well as in the lyrics of the songs here, I hope you like it!

Elves: the first-born among those who live in Middle Earth. Ethereal, beautiful, immortal creatures. Yet by the time of the War of the Ring, Middle Earth has become a home for them no longer, and they will soon leave for the Undying Lands.

Listen To The Rain - Evanescence
Listen to each drop of rain
Whispering secrets in vain.
Frantically searching for someone to hear
their story before they hit ground.
Please don’t let go,
can’t you stay for a while?
It’s just too hard to say goodbye.
Listen to the rain.

Willow - Emilie Autumn
~instrumental~

Who Wants To Live Forever - Queen
There’s no time for us.
There’s no place for us.
What is this thing that builds our dreams,
yet slips away from us?
Who wants to live forever,
who wants to live forever?
...
Forever is our today.
Who waits forever anyway?

Orcs: there is no consensus on where they came from, but some say they were once Elves, now tortured and corrupted (by Melkor, enemy of the Valar, or by other dark forces). Hideous, violent, and hateful, they create only that which can harm and destroy.

Lies - Evanescence
You will never be strong enough.
You will never be good enough.
You were never conceived in love.
You will not rise above.
They’ll never see,
I’ll never be,
I’ll struggle on and on to feed this hunger
burning deep inside of me.

A Strange Device - Emilie Autumn
~instrumental~

Planet Hell - Nightwish
The first rock thrown again,
welcome to hell, little saint.
Mother Gaia in slaughter,
welcome to paradise, soldier.
My first cry, never-ending.
All life is to fear for life.
You fool, you wanderer,
you challenged the gods and lost.
Save yourself a penny for the ferryman,
save yourself and let them suffer.

Dwarves: they are a secretive race, who nevertheless are renowned in the circles of trade. Gruff and often considered unfriendly, their skill at the forge and in the mines is unparalleled by any others. They have been forced to leave their lands many times and for many reasons, but they still maintain a hope that they will be able to return one day.

Rauta - Korpiklaani
Iske rauta, synny rauta,
Muutu kuumassa tulessa.
Vanno rauta, tapporauta,
Älä koskaan omia iske.
...
Iskuista sinäkin synnyt,
Iske, iske,
Iskuista sinäkin synnyt,
Iske, iske, ISKE!

[English:
Steel, strike now, come into being.
Transform in the hot fire.
Swear you now, killing steel,
merely to strike the enemies.
...
From strikes you are born,
Strike, strike!
From strikes you are born,
strike, strike, STRIKE!]

Brotsjór - Ólafur Arnalds
~instrumental~

Misty Mountains - The Dwarf Cast
Far over the Misty Mountains cold.
To dungeons deep and caverns old.
We must away, ere break of day,
to find our long forgotten gold.

Ents: the protectors of the trees, who are trees, themselves, in form. They are a slow, ponderous, and old race, and are mostly gone from Middle Earth by the time of the War of the Ring. Slow to change, yet firm in their decisions once they are made, the Ents are a powerful, but often forgotten, race.

In Dark Trees - Brian Eno
~instrumental~

Clouds For Brains - Thao & The Get Down Stay Down
I could wake up
I could startle and change,
let not the hot blood boil in rage.
I come from the ground,
have I moved you yet?
Don’t let me touch you, no.
May let’s be clear,
I won’t always be here,
it will only hurt you some.

The Last of the Giants (from ASOIAF series)- Ryan Yunck
Oh, I am the last of the giants,
my people are gone from the earth.
The last of the great mountain giants,
who ruled all the world at my birth.
Oh, the smallfolk have stolen my forests,
they’ve stolen my rivers and hills.
And they’ve built a great wall through my valleys,
and fished all the fish from my rills.
...
Oh, I am the last of the giants,
so learn well the words of my song.
For when I am gone the singing will fade,
and the silence shall last long and long.

Hobbits: also called halflings, they are small but have great wells of internal strength from which they have been known to draw when they need to. Essentially homebodies, they live for creature comforts but several Hobbits were crucial in the events of the War of the Ring, which were recorded for posterity by some of the Hobbits in question (they can be avid writers, if the desire strikes them).

Monument - Mirah
Let us stand resolute with our voices raised.
We have a right to insist to be free and brave,
if that should cease to exist I’d throw my heart away.
...
It’s a long, long way to the promised land
so try where you are, do what you can.
You belong to what you understand,
so teach yourself how to demand
the monument that you deserve
for rising up in a beaten down world.
...
If you feel an emptiness, if you want to hide,
think about the blood that’s pumping, keeping you alive.

In the Rowans - Balmorhea
~instrumental~

The Ring of Hope - Brobdingnagian Bards
Now the ring is gone
and my master’s sailed to his new home.
And I have no pipe with me
for one last smoke.
But I can see the Southern Star,
please take me to where you are,
for the sadness inside
floats away with my smoke.
Let the West wind blow
my ring of smoke,
over through Mordor,
the One Ring of hope.

Men: humans are one of the youngest races of Middle Earth, and really come into their inheritance of it after the War of the Ring. Proud and honorable, mainly, they are yet corruptible and fallible, more-so than most of the other races.

Alpha Shallows - Laura Marling
And his heart was full of fire at the man he had become
and his soul seldom higher at the falsities of fun.
Could embrace sweet desires and moments as they passed,
but he feared it ever more when he saw it didn’t last.
...
The grey in this city is too much to bare.
The grey in this city is too much to bare.
And I believe we are meant to be seen and not to be understood.
...
You’ll work your thumbs till they’re sore
and you’ll work my heart till it’s raw.
And you’ll call and you’ll call, but you’ll never be told,
and I’ll fall and I’ll fall and I’ll fall.
We are basic lives.

Broken Crown - Mumford & Sons
I will not speak of your sin.
There was a way out for him.
The mirror shows not,
your values are all shot.
But oh, my heart was flawed,
I knew my weakness.
So hold my hand,
consign my not to darkness.
...
So crawl on my belly till the sun goes down,
I’ll never wear your broken crown.
I can take the road, and I can fuck it all away.
But in this twilight, our choices seal our fate.

Pepita - Calexico
~instrumental~

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If you need another way to get this, let me know!

Round #20; Supernatural - Gabriel, Anna, Balthazar

2013-11-21T12:44:20Z

Fandom: Supernatural
Subject: Gabriel, Anna, Balthazar
Title: Runaway Angels
Warnings/Notes: Look, I just have a lot of feelings about these guys, ok?

Gabriel, Anna, and Balthazar are angel ‘siblings,’ as much as thousands of angels can be considered that way. They each, in their own time, chose to leave Heaven for surprisingly similar reasons (being sick of what Heaven had become to them: it was no longer home). This mix follows them through their disillusionment with Heaven, their decisions and experiences in leaving, and their less than triumphant (thanks to the attempted apocalypse and its aftermath, mainly) returns to their other siblings.

It’s structured so that it cycles through each point of view - Gabriel, Anna, Balthazar - for each of the three main divisions mentioned above, one song per angel per section. The final song felt like a necessary wrap-up to tie it all together, and belongs to all three of them. (ok, and The Boxer could probably apply to all of them, but it really gives me all the Balthazar feels, so)

Family Portrait - P!nk
It ain’t easy growing up in World War III
never knowing what love could be, you’ll see.
I don’t want love to destroy me like it has done my family.
Can we work it out? Can we be a family?
I promise I’ll be better, mommy, I’ll do anything.
Can we work it out? Can we be a family?
I promise I’ll be better, Daddy, please don’t leave.

Paradise (Coldplay cover) - Within Temptation
When she was just a girl
she expected the world.
But it flew away from her reach
so she ran away in her sleep.
Dreamed of para- para- paradise
Every time she closed her eyes.
...
Life goes on, it gets so heavy
the wheel breaks the butterfly.
Every tear a waterfall
in the night, the stormy night
she closed her eyes.
In the night, the stormy night
away she’d fly.
And dreamed of para- para- paradise.

Lights - Ellie Goulding
Voices I play within my head.
Touch my own skin and hope that I’m still breathing.
And I think back to when my brother and my sister slept
in an unlocked place, the only time I feel safe.
You show the lights that stop me, turn to stone
you shine it when I’m alone.
And so I tell myself that I’ll be strong
And dreaming when they’re gone.

Capsize - Karen O and the Kids
Oh, Momma turned her back on me,
Daddy left when I was three,
don’t tell Sis, I’m out the door!
I won’t need them anymore.
...
C-A-P-S-I-Z-E all the way home, I’m gonna tilt a while.
M-I-S-S-M-E all you want, you’re gonna wait a while.

Valley of the Dolls - Marina & the Diamonds
Born with a void, hard to destroy with love or hope.
Built with a heart, broken from the start and now I die slow.
In the valley of the dolls, we sleep. Got a hole inside of me,
living with identities that do not belong to me.
In my life I got this far, now I’m ready for the last hoorah.
Dying like a shooting star,
In the valley.

The Fallen - Franz Ferdinand
So we stole and drank Champagne
on the seventh seal you said you never feel pain.
“I never feel pain, won’t you hit me again?
I need a bit of black and blue to be a rotation.”
In my blood I feel the bubbles burst
there was a flash of fist, an eyebrow burst.
You’ve a lazy laugh and a red-white shirt,
I fell to the floor, fainting at the sight of blood.
...
The fallen are the virtuous among us, walk among us.
If you judge us, we’re all damned.

The Noose - A Perfect Circle
Recall the deeds as if they’re all
someone else’s atrocious stories.
Now you stand reborn before us all,
so glad to see you well.
And not to pull your halo down
around your neck and tug you to the ground,
but I’m more than just a little curious
how you’re planning to go about
making your amends to the dead.

Sugar and Spice - Basia Bulat
I looked to the sky and I saw the sun turning to rust.
I looked for the road, but all I could see was the dust.
I remembered your voice, when you said it was better for us.
Oh, oh, oh how I’ve done myself in.
I’ve played out my hand, I’m turning it in,
the house always wins in the end.
Oh, oh, oh how I’ve done myself in.
Oh, oh, oh how I’ve done myself in.

The Boxer (Simon & Garfunkel cover, feat. Jerry Douglas & Paul Simon) - Mumford & Sons
In the clearing stands a boxer
and a fighter by his trade.
And he carries the reminder
of every glove that laid him down
and cut him till he cried out,
in his anger and his shame,
“I am leaving, I am leaving”
but the fighter still remains.

Missing - Evanescence
Please, please forgive me,
but I won’t be home again.
Maybe someday you’ll look up
and barely conscious, you’ll say to no one,
“Isn’t something missing?”
You won’t cry for my absence, I know,
you forgot me long ago.
Am I that unimportant?
Am I so insignificant?
Isn’t something missing?
Isn’t someone missing me?

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Round #19; Meet the Mixer - devyn_rose

2013-10-27T07:16:51Z

Fandom: General
Subject: devyn_rose
Title: A Secret Me
Warnings/Notes: This was more difficult than I thought it'd be. It turned out to be more of a mix about being queer than I was intending, but that's just how it happened. It's half nostalgia and half more recent stuff, so sorry about any nostalgia bombs that might get dropped on you here, but every song is or has been extremely meaningful to me. They're the songs I listen to on repeat until I'm sick of them. Warnings for some mentions of mental illness and spoilers for Repo! the Genetic Opera (which also has references to death of parents)?

(pics used in album art taken by me)

Say Shh - Atmosphere
I wanted to make a song about where I’m from, you know?
Big up my hometown, my territory, my state but
I couldn’t figure out much to brag about
Prince lives here, we got 10,000 lakes.
But wait, the women are beautiful, to me they are
and we’re not infested with pretentious movie stars.
And it hit, Minnesota is dope
if only simply for not what we have but what we don’t.

Yes, this is a completely serious rap song about Minnesota. I love my home state, ok? And even though I’m not in the Midwest right now, hopefully I’ll go back one day.

Reflection - Christina Aguilara
I am now
in a world where I have to hide my heart
and what I believe in.
But somehow
I will show the world what’s inside my heart
and be loved for who I am.
...
Must I pretend that I’m
someone else for all time?
When will my reflection show
who I am inside?

Mulan was my absolute favorite Disney movie when I was younger, and I still love it. I’ve always related to this song on a very personal level, and still do (all my young!queer feels, let me show you them).

Somewhere I Belong - Linkin Park
What do I have but negativity
‘cause I can’t justify the way everyone is looking at me.
(Nothing to lose)
Nothing to gain, hollow and alone
and the fault is my own, and the fault is my own.
I wanna heal, I wanna feel what I thought was never real.
I wanna let go of the pain I’ve felt so long.
(Erase all the pain till it’s gone)
I wanna heal, I wanna feel like I’m close to something real.
I wanna find something I’ve wanted all along:
somewhere I belong.

Teen!me nostalgia bomb, basically.

Imaginary (demo v2) - Evanescence
Don’t say I’m out of touch
with this rampant chaos, your reality.
I know well what lies beyond my sleeping refuge
the nightmare I built my own world to escape.
...
If you need to leave the world you live in
lay your head down and stay a while.
Though you may not remember dreaming
something waits for you to breathe again.

Oh, god, so much teen!me nostalgia up in here :p

I Didn’t Know I’d Love You So Much - Repo! The Genetic Opera
Sometimes I wanted to cry
when the people on t.v. were not quite the way we were.
Somehow, I guess I just knew...
But I didn’t know I’d love you so much.
I didn’t know I’d love you so much.
I didn’t know I’d love you so much,
but I do.
...
And we will always have each other
in our time of need.

I love musicals/rock operas, and I wanted to represent my family in this mix. This song just about sums up how I feel about them (minus the dead mother and repossession of body parts underlying this song in the actual show; my life is not a musical).

Runs In The Family - Amanda Palmer
Me? Well, I’m well.
Well, I mean I’m in hell.
Well, I still have my health.
(At least that’s what they tell me)
If wellness is this, what in hell’s name is sickness?
But business is business!
And business runs in the family,
we tend to bruise easily, bad in the blood.
I’m telling you ‘cause I just want you to know me,
know me and my family.
We’re wonderful folks,
but don’t get too close to me
‘cause you might knock me up.

Say what you will about Amanda Palmer as a person, but she’s somehow able to capture exactly how I feel about my mental health (or lack thereof). The only trouble was deciding which song of hers to use! (it was between this and Bad Habit, but it really does run in my family...)

Teen Idle (Acoustic) - Marina & The Diamonds
I wanna be a bottle blonde.
I don’t know why but I feel conned.
I wanna be an idle teen,
I wish I hadn’t been so clean.
I wanna stay inside all day.
I want the world to go away.
I want blood, guts, and chocolate cake.
I wanna be a real fake.
Yeah, I wish I’d been, I wish I’d been a teen, teen idle.
Wish I’d been a prom queen fighting for the title.
Instead of being sixteen and burning up a Bible,
feeling super, super (super!) suicidal.

I don’t know how Marina does it, either, but this is exactly how I feel about my teenage years, looking back at them.

A Thousand Years - Christina Perri
Time stands still,
beauty in all she is.
I will be brave,
I will not let anything take away
what’s standing in front of me.
Every breath, every hour has come to this.
One step closer.
I have died every day waiting for you.
Darling, don’t be afraid, I have loved you
for a thousand years.
I’ll love you for a thousand more.

Yes, this is from a Twilight soundtrack. But I love it because it sounds like a girl singing a grand, sweeping love song to another girl, which isn’t something you hear on the radio ever (unless it’s this song). It also reminds me of Sailor Moon, which was a formative influence on me, and my first fandom!

She Keeps Me Warm - Mary Lambert
And I can’t change, even if I tried.
Even if I wanted to.
And I can’t change, even if I tried.
Even if I wanted to.
My love, my love, my love, my love,
she keeps me warm.
She keeps me warm.

Cute, sappy love song? Check. Explains my feelings about being a girl who is attracted to other girls? Check. And I like it much better than that annoying Macklemore song that also uses this chorus.

This Is Gospel - Panic! At The Disco
This is gospel for the fallen ones,
locked away in permanent slumber.
Assembling their philosophies
from pieces of broken memories.
Oh, this is the beat of my heart, this is the beat of my heart.
The gnashing teeth and criminal tongues
conspire against the odds.
But they haven’t seen the best of us yet.

I’m pagan (for lack of a better word), and this song reminds me of my gods and my religious practices. And I recently re-discovered P!ATD; I couldn’t not have them on this mix.

Tiptoe - Imagine Dragons
In the morning light, let my roots take flight.
Watch me fall above like a vicious dove.
They don’t see me come, who can blame them?
They never seem to catch my eye, but I never wondered why.
I won’t fall asleep,
I won't fall asleep.
Hey yeah, don’t let ‘em know we’re coming.
Hey yeah, tiptoe higher.
Take some time to simmer down, keep your head down low.
Hey yeah, tiptoe higher.

This song cheers me up, and felt like a hopeful (and abrupt, but I like that) way to end the mix. I hope you enjoyed it!

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Round #18; Welcome To Night Vale - Carlos (Cecil/Carlos)

2013-08-24T03:12:33Z

Fandom: Welcome To Night Vale
Subject: Carlos POV Cecil/Carlos (The consequence of sound by Skoll)
Title: Silence Is Harder
Warnings/Notes: Spoilers through One Year Later. Some creepy implications because of the power Cecil holds over the town, but nothing weirder than canon. This is based on the first fic I read for WTNV fandom, and it's still my favorite interpretation of Cecil's place as the Voice of Night Vale. Quotes from the story included, so some spoilers for that, too.

“A friendly desert community where the sun is hot, the moon is beautiful, and mysterious lights pass overhead while we all pretend to sleep. Welcome to Night Vale.”

Welcome to Night Vale is a podcast in the style of a radio show, hosted by Cecil Baldwin, the Voice of Night Vale. It's kind of like what A Prairie Home Companion might sound like if it took place in a desert town inside the Twilight Zone. Cecil reports all the news from Night Vale, decrees from the city government and the Sheriff's Secret Police, as well as the weather and local ads (and occasionally his own opinions on things and people around town). Carlos is a scientist who came to Night Vale to study all the strangeness it produces, and with whom Cecil fell in love "instantly" upon his arrival. This mix and the fic it's based on are basically Welcome to Night Vale as seen through Carlos' perspective, but Skoll's summary puts it better than I:

It's not a small thing, to be so important to the Voice of a place as powerful and impossible as Night Vale. Carlos is learning that, now.

(Or: Just because Carlos spends a year not romantically involved with Cecil doesn't mean that Cecil doesn't play a role in his life during that year. Actually, it's probably a much bigger role than Cecil realizes.)

There's a shiver up Carlos' spine the first time his truck's tires lurch over the boundary to Night Vale

The Balled of Fiedler and Mundt - Disparition
~instrumental~

Sometimes, a year later, he'll look back at this moment, and realize he had literally no idea what he was getting himself into.

Consequence of Sounds - Regina Spektor
That very same morning right next to her coffee
She noticed some bleeding and heard hollow coughing and
National Geographic was being too graphic,
When all she had wanted to know was the traffic
"The worlds got a nosebleed" it said
"And we're flooding but we keep on cutting
The trees and the forests!"
And we keep on paying those freaks on the TV,
Who claim they will save us but want to enslave us.
And sweating like demons they scream through our speakers
But we leave the sound on 'cause silence is harder.

“You can't live in Night Vale without a radio”

Do You Know What I’m Seeing? - Panic! At the Disco
Clouds are marching along, singing a song, just like they do.
If the clouds were singing a song, I’d sing along, wouldn’t you too?
If you just knew what they could do.
Oh, if you just knew, what would they do?
...
I know it’s sad that I never gave a damn about the weather
and it never gave a damn about me.

Carlos has the strange feeling—and he can never explain later why this is—that this voice is Important complete with the implied capital letter.

Hear Me - Imagine Dragons
Try to hear my voice.
You can leave, now it’s your choice.
Maybe if I fall asleep, I won’t breathe right.
Maybe if I leave tonight, I won’t come back.
I said it before, I won’t say it again.
Love is a game to you, it’s not pretend.
...
Can nobody hear me?

It's strange, but it turns out like this—Cecil loves Carlos from the start, and so Night Vale does too.

Uninvited - Alanis Morissette
Like any uncharted territory
I must seem greatly intriguing.
You speak of my love like
you have experienced love like mine before.
But this is not allowed.
You’re uninvited.
An unfortunate slight.
I don’t think you unworthy.
I need a moment to deliberate.

And then, after the miscommunication with the clocks—though how come quickly I have an important scientific inquiry turns into let's go on a date, Carlos still isn't entirely sure, and it's not that he isn't flattered, he just doesn't know Cecil all that well—Carlos for the first time faces the town without Cecil's influence.

Storm Warning - I Am Kloot
I would have kept you free from harm
rang the bells or raised alarms.
I would have kept them all at bay
except I thought I heard you say,
‘You’re the leper boy, you can’t come in.
The monkey god is now your king.
You’re out, you’re in,
you’re out, you’re in,
you’re out.’

Of Angels And Angles - The Decemberists
There are angels in your angles.
There’s a low moon caught in your tangles.
There’s a ticking at the sill.
There’s a purr of a pigeon to break the still of the day.
As on we go drowning
down we go today.
And darling, we go a-drowning
down we go away
away.

And Carlos, huddled and stunned on the incline leading to the miniature city, realizes that he's going to die an idiot, because, for all that he's heard Cecil's voice on the radio for a year now, apparently he never really listened before.

Always - Panic! At the Disco
I’m a fly that’s trapped
in a web
but I’m thinking that
my spider’s dead.
Lonely, lonely little life
I could kid myself
thinking that I’m fine.
It was always you
falling for me.
Now there’s always time
calling for me.
I’m the light
blinking at the end of the road.
Blink back to let me know.

They lean together, and look up at the lights. And they say nothing, because nothing needs to be said.

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Round #17; Supernatural - Anna Milton

2013-07-24T04:07:59Z

Fandom:Supernatural
Subject:Anna Milton
Title:A Reasonable Sacrifice
Warnings/Notes:I've seen lots of great mixes for Anna, the angel. I haven't seen as many (hardly any, really) mixes for Anna Milton, the human. So that's what this mix (mostly) is. Her decision to fall, and her life until she gets her grace back.

Anna Milton is a fallen angel. She chose to rip out her grace and fall so that she could experience life and emotions as a human. She has no memories of her former life as an angel at first, although as a child she had what those around her considered a mental break where she claimed her father was not her real Father and that her real Father was going to kill her for what she’d done. Otherwise, her childhood and early adulthood were fairly average. When the angels raised Dean Winchester from Hell, Anna began to hear them talking in her head about their plans and the Apocalypse, and was subsequently hospitalized in a mental institution. She was pursued by both angels and demons when they realized she had a direct line to ‘angel radio’ and was rescued by the Winchesters, who got psychic Pamela Barnes to help Anna regain her memories. Anna managed to escape both the demons and the angels by reclaiming her grace and becoming an angel again.

This is a mix for the Anna she chose to be, instead of the one she was expected to be.

“Perfect... Like a marble statue. Cold... no choice... only obedience. Dean, do you know how many angels have actually seen God? Seen his face?...Four angels. Four. And I'm not one of them.”

Heavy Storm - First Aid Kit
I wish I could believe in something bigger,
more than these trees, these winds, these oceans.
I wish I could believe what they tell me.
I saw, I saw, I saw my brother pack his bags and leave.
We made our goodbyes and now he is settled down
in the city where he doesn’t have to be himself.

Numb - Marina & the Diamonds
One track mind like a goldfish.
Stuck inside my petri dish.
I can’t breathe and I can’t smile,
this better be worth my while.
I feel numb most of the time.
Lower I get, the higher I’ll climb
and I will wonder why
I got dark only to shine.
Looking for the golden light.
Oh, it’s a reasonable sacrifice.
Burn, burn, burn bright.

“My grace. It's... energy. Hacked it out and fell. My mother, Amy, couldn't get pregnant. Always called me her little miracle. She had no idea how right she was.”

Dare You To Move (Switchfoot cover) - Jayesslee
Welcome to the planet. Welcome to existence.
Everyone’s here, everyone’s here.
Everybody’s watching you now.
Everybody waits for you now.
What happens next, what happens next?
...
Welcome to the fallout. Welcome to resistance.
The tension is here, the tension is here,
between who you are and who you could be.
Between how it is and how it should be.

The People Who Raised Me - Gregory and the Hawk
I’ve been the wild one.
I’ve run through the streets and I’ve suffered.
I’ve been the quiet one,
sequestered and smothered.
But I won’t mind no time spent to save me,
just trying to be good to the people who raised me.

I Was A Daughter - Basia Bulat
If you call tomorrow I will dream I was a daughter,
weaving through these brand new silver streams.
Turned into dusty roads that we both wandered on,
we prayed to perfect Avalon.
We wished for anyone to take us home.
...
We swam in the rivers, sang with the birds,
gave away our hearts before we knew what they were.
What a pretty fall.

Saturn Girl - Paula Cole
I can’t explain, why I don’t belong to the same world;
I don’t fit in and I will not stay.
I want to fly.
Oh, I long for my violet skies,
my astral nights, my peace of mind.
...
Lost in another world, oh Saturn, Saturn girl.

Breaking Down - Florence + The Machine
All alone, even when I was a child, I’ve always known
there was something to be frightened of.
And I can see it coming from the edge of the room,
creeping in the streetlight.
Holding my hand in the pale gloom,
can you see it coming now?
Oh, I think I’m breaking down again.

Troubled Mind - Marina & the Diamonds
Off she trots to the psychiatric hospital;
all she’s got is the memory of a girl that used to laugh a lot.
Now she’s very angry ‘cause they say she’s lost the plot,
and she’s laughing in the mirror at her paper dress.
Because she has a troubled mind, a troubled mind.
...
Wipe the white golden dust into these broken hands.
Must depend on a friend that will understand.
Like the glitter making love to the gleam,
just remember things aren’t always what they seem.

Violet Stars Happy Hunting! - Janelle Monáe
Impossibly (Wait! It’s impossible) they’re gunning for me!
(That they’re gunning for me and now they’re after you)
And now the Army’s after you for loving too!
(baby, I hear the sirens go doodooo)

“I remember now....I'm an angel.”

Secret Message - Rasputina
I’m not at liberty to say
how a secret message came for you today.
It holds the secrets of my heart and my mind.
It tells of vast expanses stretching backwards over time.
Two objects at equidistance acting as if they cared.
Does weight follow mass in this instance?
Oh, e equals mc squared.
I’m not at liberty to say
how a secret message came for you today.

Hope in the Air - Laura Marling
Pick up your rope Lord, sling it to me,
if we are to battle I must not be weak.
And give us your strength, world,
and your food and your water;
oh, I am your savior, your last serving daughter.
There’s hope in the air, there’s hope in the water,
but sadly not me, your last serving daughter.

“Every emotion, Dean, even the bad ones... It's why I fell. It's why... why I'd give anything not to have to go back. Anything.”

My Skin - Natalie Merchant
I’ve been treated so wrong, I’ve been treated so long
as if I’m becoming untouchable.
I’m a slow dying flower, frost killing hour,
the sweet turning sour and untouchable.
Oh, I need the darkness, the sweetness,
the sadness, the weakness.
Oh, I need this.
I need a lullaby, a kiss goodnight,
angel sweet, love of my life.
Oh, I need this.

“Sister, you're the Stanley Cup. And sooner or later, Heaven or Hell, they're gonna find you.”

“I know. And that's why I'm gonna get it back....My grace.”

Amazing Grace - Ani DiFranco
‘Twas grace that taught my heart to fear
and grace that fear relieved.
How precious did that grace appear
the hour I first believed.
Through many dangers, toils, and snares
I have already come.
‘Twas grace that brought me safely thus far,
and grace will lead me home.

ss
4s

Round #16; Adventure Time - What Was Missing

2013-06-24T05:40:43Z

Fandom: Adventure Time
Subject: Princess Bubblegum/Marceline (+Finn)
Title: Shall We Sing?
Warnings/Notes: Spoilers for one of the more controversial episodes of Adventure Time, What Was Missing (controversial mostly because of official reactions to an official reaction to it, re: potential/implied lesbian relationships, not by the fans). This episode is the one that pretty much singlehandedly built one of the largest 'ships in AT fandom, and I love it more every time I watch it; I think the emotional honesty between the girls (and everyone, really) is particularly powerful. Also, they save the day with singing.

“What Was Missing” is the tenth episode in season three of Adventure Time. In it, a Door Lord steals the most important objects of several characters -- Finn, Jake, and Princess Bubblegum among them. Those three and Marceline form a band to open the final door of the Door Lord (which will “open to no command, save for a song from a genuine band”; LOTR parallels anyone?) and get their stuff back. It takes several attempted songs and band breakups before the door can be opened, with the final song uniting the feuding friends and opening the door with the truth in Finn’s words.

What this episode reveals about the relationship between Princess Bubblegum (PB) and Marceline is the most interesting part of it, for me. The first song they attempt, I’m Just Your Problem, is sung by Marceline and directed at PB; it nearly opens the door, indicating that it got close to the truth about Marceline’s feelings for PB, and sounds like a song about a relationship that ended badly. They fight on and off throughout the episode, with some obviously old anger and arguments backing them up. When everyone gets their stuff back from the Door Lord, we find out that PB’s most important thing was an old band tee that Marceline had given to her, when they were on better relationship terms (she wears it all the time, as pajamas).

Their attempts to be friendly to each other despite having some sort of bad falling-out fascinate me, as do the hints at a possible same-sex relationship in a show aimed at children. I tried to get this mix to mimic both the sound of each character’s individual music and them all as a group while following the basic course of the episode. It mainly follows Marceline and PB’s attempts at negotiating their relationship post-falling-out (I unabashedly made it a former romantic relationship for this mix, where trying-to-be-the-perfect-ruler-PB left Marceline in order to better rule her kingdom instead of being influenced by an emotional and impulsive vampire queen), but it ends with Finn’s desire for his friends to get along with each other, as that is the overarching idea of the episode.

This is a mix about miscommunication and wanting to get along again but not knowing how (and a little bit of your oblivious friend who just wants everyone to be friends).

“Ha! Looks like you aren’t as perfect as you thought. Guess you can’t judge me anymore.”

“I never said you had to be perfect!”

I Knew You Were Trouble (8-bit) - Taylor Swift
~instrumental~

Heartless (Kanye West cover) - The Fray
So I got somethin’ new to see,
you just gon’ keep hating me,
and we just gon’ be enemies.
I know you can’t believe
I could just leave it wrong.
And you can’t make it right
so I’ma take off tonight into the night.
Hear ‘em talk, the coldest story ever told.
Somewhere far along this road he lost his soul
to a woman so heartless.
How could you be so heartless?

Stars - fun.
And there are people on the street, they’re coming up to me.
They’re telling me that they like what I do now.
And so I tried my best when I took the fall
to get right back up, back in your arms.
If you’re out here why do I miss you so much?
I feel like I had it all back before I lost it all.
Now I just wait for you to talk to me
but you won’t even look at me, baby.
And I’d be saying that you,
you’re always holding on to stars.
I think they’re better from afar,
‘cause no one is gonna save us.

I’m Just Your Problem (cover) - Elena Íviel Berciano feat. Nicole Vaquerano
It’s like I’m not even a person, am I?
I’m just your problem.
Well, I shouldn’t have to justify what I do.
I shouldn’t have to prove anything to you.
I’m sorry that I exist;
I forget what landed me on your blacklist.
But I shouldn’t have to be the one that makes up with you, so...
why do I want to?
Why do I want to...

Swimming - Florence + the Machine
Your songs remind of swimming,
which I forgot when I started to sink.
Dragged further away from the shore
and deeper into the drink.
Sat on the bottom of the ocean,
a stern and stubborn rock.
‘Cause your songs remind me of swimming,
but somehow I forgot.

Explosions - Ellie Goulding
You left my soul bleeding in the dark
so you could be king.
The rules you set are still untold to me and I’ve
lost my faith in everything.
The nights you could cope, your intentions were gold,
but the mountains will shake I need to know I can still make
explosions. On the day you wake up, needing somebody
and you’ve learned it’s ok to be afraid but it will never be the same.
...
I pray that you will find peace of mind and I’ll find you another time.
I’ll love you, another time.

I’m Just Your Problem (8-bit) - Rebecca Sugar
~instrumental~

What Am I To You? (My Best Friends in the World) - Jeremy Shada
Do you think that I don’t understand?
I just wanted us together and to play as a band,
last night was the most fun I’ve ever had,
even liked it when the two of you would get mad
at each other.
Oh, you are my best friends in the world.
You are my best friends in the world.
That’s right, I’m talking about the two of you girls,
and you, Jake.
I wanna sing a song to you and I refuse to make it fake.

C’Mon - Panic! At the Disco & fun.
Try not to mistake what you have with what you hate,
it could leave it could leave come the morning.
Celebrate the night, it’s the fall before the climb.
Shall we sing, shall we sing till the morning?
If I fall forward, you fall flat.
And if the sun should lift me up, would you come back?
So c’mon.

4s
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Round #15; Adventure Time - The Land of Ooo

2013-05-23T01:03:49Z

Fandom:Adventure Time
Subject:The Land of Ooo
Title:We'll Go To Very Distant Lands
Warnings/Notes:I recently fell in love with Adventure Time, and thought it would be perfect for this round. It's a show with a lot to say about the typical (and not so typical) hero/villain/damsel-in-distress dynamic, and can be surprisingly dark (granted, it does take place in a world that's been devastated by nuclear fallout). I went kind of the odd way and made a mix about the world itself instead of a particular character because it's enough of a presence to almost be its own character (and I got to explore both sides this way!).

Adventure Time takes place “after the bombs have fallen and magic has come back into the world”. It’s a post-apocalyptic world, one thousand years after The Mushroom War has ended. Life has come back into the world, but it’s (mostly) not life as we know it. Think candy people and sentient lumps; vampire queens and magical talking, stretchy dogs; monsters born from nuclear devastation and heroes who are the last of their species. The Land of Ooo is where most of the action of the show takes place (there are a few other dimensions and alternate universes, after all). It’s a place that creates heroes and villains in equal (and equally fun) amounts, with plenty of shades of grey in between. A place where the hero might fight their enemy with singing as often as with swords, and the princesses save their heroes when the need arises.

This is a mix dedicated to the Land of Ooo and the people it shapes.

The Fog Rolls In - Nox Arcana
~instrumental~

Land Lost - In The Nursery
~instrumental~

Imagine (John Lennon cover) - A Perfect Circle
Imagine there’s no heaven, it’s easy if you try.
No hell below us, above us only sky.
Imagine all the people living for today.

Shankill Butchers - The Decemberists
They used to be just like me and you,
they used to be sweet little boys.
But something went horribly askew,
now killing is their only source of joy.
Cuz everybody knows if you don’t mind your mother’s words
a wicked wind will blow your ribbons from your curls.
Everybody moan, everybody shake.
The Shankill Butchers want to catch you awake.

A Fire Is Burning - Oysterband
Names were gone like footprints, a whisper on the wind.
A lover was a comrade, was a stranger, was a friend.
When we slept our eyes were open and this thumping in our chest
said there is no, there is no, there is no rest.
Because a fire is burning in our house,
a fire burning up the house of man.

Barlights - fun.
And I really wanna take a swing,
I can’t help but remember James Dean.
See we are part of the few who agree
that, hey, he lived life fast
but he died, he died, he died.
Me, I’m gonna live forever.
...
For the first time in a long time I feel alive.

On Top of the World - Imagine Dragons
I’ve tried to cut these corners,
try to take the easy way out.
I kept on falling short of something.
I coulda gave up then but
then again I couldn’t have cuz
I’ve traveled all this way for something.
I take it in but don’t look down,
cuz I’m on top of the world, ‘ay,
I’m on top of the world, ‘ay.
Waiting on this for a while now,
paying my dues to the dirt.
I’ve been waiting to smile, ‘ay,
been holding it in for a while, ‘ay.
Take you with me if I can,
been dreaming of this since a child.
I’m on top of the world.

The World I Know (Collective Soul cover, live) - David Cook
So I walk up on high and I step to the edge
to see my world below.
And I laugh at myself while the tears roll down.
Cuz it’s the world I know,
it’s the world I know.

King And Lionheart - Of Monsters And Men
And in the winter night sky ships are sailing,
looking down on these bright blue city lights.
And they won’t wait, and they won’t wait, and they won’t wait.
We’re here to stay, we’re here to stay, we’re here to stay.
Howling ghosts they reappear
in mountains that are stacked with fear,
but you’re a king and I’m a lionheart.
A lionheart.

Our Voices - Matthew Barber
Sing this song with me
and you will never be sad or alone,
on the road or at home.
Sing along with me
and your eyes will see what your ears hear,
and that’s our voices my dear.

Yawny At the Apocalypse - Andrew Bird
~instrumental~

SS
4s

Round #14; Supernatural - Kate

2013-04-23T04:45:29Z

Fandom: Supernatural
Subject: Kate (from episode 8.04, Bitten)
Title: Where No One Knows My Name
Warnings/Notes: spoilers for 8.04. Because the obvious choice for a journeys mix is a one-off character from Supernatural, right?

Kate is one of three friends whose films make up episode 8.04 of Supernatural, “Bitten”. Her boyfriend, Mike, is bitten and turned by a werewolf, and the episode then centers around how the group of friends is affected by the aftermath. She ends up being turned by Mike’s friend, Brian, after he has been turned and killed Mike in a jealous rage over Kate. In turn, Kate kills Brian, finishes their film with a message to the Winchesters (who have been hunting the werewolf that turned Mike) to just give her a chance, and leaves town, her old life and hopes and dreams gone for good.

This is a mix about finding yourself again after tragedy, and what the Winchesters leave behind when they’ve killed the ‘monster of the week’.

I’ve never hurt anyone. Nobody human, anyway. I didn’t choose this. Please. Please give me a chance.

Forever Young (Bob Dylan cover, acapella) - Audra Mae
May your hands always be busy, may your feet always be swift.
May you have a strong foundation when the winds of changes shift.
And may your heart always be joyful, may your song always be sung.
And may you stay forever young.
May you stay forever young.

Boston - Augustana
She said: You don’t know me, you don’t even care.
She said: You don’t know me, and you don’t wear my chains.
She said: I think I’ll go to Boston.
I think I’ll start a new life.
I think I’ll start it over,
where no one knows my name.

I Can’t Stay - The Killers
Exoneration lost his eraser but my forgiver found the sun.
And there are twisted days that I take comfort, ‘cause I’m not the only one.
No, I’m not the only one.
In the dark, for a while now, I can’t stay very far.
I can’t stay much longer, riding my decision home.

Slow And Steady - Of Monsters And Men
Two wolves in the dark, running in the wind.
I’m letting go but I’ve never felt better,
passing by all the monsters in my head.
I move slow and steady but I feel like a waterfall.
Yeah, I move slow and steady past the ones that I used to know.

I’m An Animal - Neko Case
You could say it’s my instinct.
Yes, I still have one.
There’s no time to second guess it,
yes, there are things that I’m still so afraid of.
But my courage is roaring like the sound of the sun,
‘cause it’s vain about its mane and will reveal them to no one.
Now I’m an animal.
You’re an animal, too.

Such A Common Bird - Ane Brun
I’m a lone wolf, a beauty and a beast.
Both hunter and hunted, soft tongue and sharp teeth.
I’m toned from my travels, yet raw from this road,
as I drink from storm puddles and the stories I’m told.
Help me figure this out.
Help me figure you in.
You’re a shadow to me,
that I echo when I sing.

Heartlines (acoustic) - Florence + the Machine
Oh the river, oh the river, it’s running free.
And oh the joy, oh the joy it brings to me.
But I know it’ll have to drown me before I can breathe easy.
And I’ve seen it in the flights of birds, I’ve seen it in you.
In the entrails of the animals, the blood running through.
But in order to get to the heart
I think sometimes you have to cut through.
But you can’t.
...
Keep it up, I know you can.
Just keep following the heartlines on your hand.

Titanium - David Guetta feat. Sia
Cut me down but it’s you who’ll have further to fall.
Ghost town and haunted love, raise your voice,
sticks and stones may break my bones.
I’m talking loud, not saying much.
I’m bulletproof, nothing to lose.
Fire away, fire away.
Ricochet, you take your aim.
Fire away, fire away.

SS
4shared

Round #13; Supernatural - Anna/Jo

2013-03-21T05:03:58Z

Fandom:Supernatural
Subject:Anna/Jo
Title:In Prayers and Proclamations
Warnings/Notes:Kinda spoilery through 5x13, but mostly shippy-ness. I'm so sick of Supernatural killing off all its ladies (and every other side character ever, but I digress), so I fight that by shipping them every which way and just generally trying to spread the love for them. But I always seem to come back to these two (and Meg and Bela, but I already made a mix for them and I've been having too many solo Meg feels to do a shippy mix for her right now). I don't know that I really have an OTP, since I'm such a multishipper, but I think if I do, Anna/Jo is it.

Jo Harvelle and Anna Milton are both runaways, in their own ways.

Jo is a girl who ran away to become a Hunter, to feel closer to her father (a Hunter who was killed on a hunt gone bad with John Winchester). Her mother wanted her to live a more ‘normal’ life, but Jo never fit in; she was “a freak with a knife collection” and she never felt like she belonged to the civilian world. She was eventually joined on her hunts by her mother, Ellen, during the attempted Apocalypse.

Anna is an angel who tore out her own Grace to become human, so she could feel like her Father’s greatest creation can. She was stationed on Earth for thousands of years, watching humanity and sick for home, “waiting on orders from an unknowable Father” until she snapped and Fell, choosing free will over angelic obedience. She regained her Grace and stayed away from Heaven and her family as long as she could, but was eventually caught and brought back for a sort of angel reprogramming.

This mix picks up after Anna has regained her Grace. She stumbles onto Jo during one of her hunts (or Jo stumbles onto her, they’re never quite sure which way it was) and fall into a relationship. Jo doesn’t want to be the one to get Anna hurt or caught, though she feels a connection to her, but Anna is insistent right from the start and eventually they fall in love (what, I can’t be sappy about my OTP?). But, this mix follows canon for the most part and so too soon Anna is turned in and taken back to Heaven. When she returns, it’s to find Jo dead and gone to her but she can’t regret what they had.

Every emotion...even the bad ones. It’s why I fell.

Song Of The Century - Green Day
Sing us a song of the century,
that’s louder than bombs and eternity.
The era of static and contraband
that’s leading us into the promised land.
Tell us a story that’s by candlelight,
waging a war and losing the fight.
...
Sing us a song for me.

I Still Haven’t Found What I’m Looking For (U2 cover, live) - David Cook
I have kissed honey lips. Felt the healing in her fingertips.
It burned like fire, this burning desire.
I have spoke with the tongue of angels.
I have held the hand of a devil;
it was warm in the night, I was cold as a stone.
But I still haven’t found what I’m looking for.

Joy Ride - The Killers
Headlights on the highway,
the desert wind is howling.
Rattlesnakes and romance
are spilling with the rain.
Candy apple red dress,
bleeding when she kissed me.
Heaven in a ragtop
takes away my pain.

Absence Of Fear - Jewel
Muscle and sinew. Velvet and stone.
This vessel is haunted, it creaks and moans.
My bones call to you in your separate skin.
I make myself translucent to let you in, for,
I am wanting. And I am needing you here,
inside the absence of fear.

Don’t Say A Word - Ellie Goulding
I’m more alive than I’ve ever been,
so now I give you all my sins.
I’ve chosen you, I’ve chosen you,
but don’t say a word.
And if I save us, and I fall down,
I will leave your words behind now.
If you never held me under,
if you never hear my thunder.
If you never, if you never.

Light A Roman Candle With Me - fun.
If we were honest and both wrote a sonnet,
together a sandwich with everything on it,
at least we would know that the sparks didn’t glow.
But we owe it to ourselves to try so we aim and ignite!
So often I call and I plead with you: “Give me a chance!”
It’s not often that I understand
the ins and the outs of what’s wrong and what’s right.
So don’t think of tomorrow tonight.
...
Light a roman candle with me.
Just a roman candle, just a perfect apple.

Arms - Christina Perri
The world is coming down on me
and I can’t find a reason to be loved.
I never wanna leave you
but I can’t make you bleed if I’m alone.
You put your arms around me and I believe
that it’s easier for you to let me go.
I hope that you see right through my walls.
I hope you catch me, ‘cause I’m already falling.

All This And Heaven Too - Florence + the Machine
And the heart is hard to translate, it has a language of its own.
It talks in tongues and quiet sighs, in prayers and proclamations.
...
And I would give all this and Heaven, too.
I would give it all if only for a moment
that I could just understand the meaning of the word you see,
‘cause I’ve been scrawling it forever but it never made sense to me at all.

Glitter In The Air - P!nk
It’s only half past the point of oblivion.
The hourglass on the table, the walk before the run.
The breath before the kiss and the fear before the flames.
Have you ever felt this way?

 Can’t Help Falling In Love - Ingrid Michaelson
Shall I stay? Would it be a sin?
If I can’t help falling in love with you.
Like a river flows surely to the sea,
darling so it goes some things are meant to be.

Haunted - Kelly Clarkson
It’s not fair just when I found my world,
they took you, they broke you, they tore out your heart.
...
Where did you go?
All these questions run through my mind.
I wish I couldn’t feel at all.
Let me be numb, I’m starting to fall.
...
You were smiling.

End Of The Dream - Evanescence
I found a grave, brushed off the face,
felt your light and I remember why I know this place.
...
As much as it hurts ain’t it wonderful to feel?
So go on and break your wings.
Follow your heart till it bleeds
as we run towards the end of the dream.

ss
4shared

Round #12; Supernatural - Dean and His Parents

2013-02-21T05:36:14Z

Fandom:Supernatural
Subject:Dean and his parent issues
Title:His Mother's Son
Warnings/Notes:Implied abuse and vague hints of potential incest (deals with Dean as John's replacement, so to speak, for Mary, so it's all up to personal interpretation how far that goes). Also contains interpretations of canon that not everyone may agree with, and info from John's Journal. This is not a John Winchester appreciation mix.

Dean is the oldest child of Mary and John Winchester. When Dean was four, Mary died, pinned to the ceiling and in flames. With Mary went the only home Dean had ever known, and he has spent his entire life trying to return to that, all the while looking up to an idealized vision of a mother that he barely knew. In Mary's absence, John often turned to alcohol and ignored his children except to protect them and to teach them how to hunt down monsters. Dean was left to mostly raise himself and Sam alone, taking away any chances he might have had at a childhood of his own. Despite his father's continual absence, he looked up to him in an almost worshipful manner, mimicking his taste in clothes, cars, music, etc.

Dean is much more like his mother than he ever was like his father, however. His desire for a home and way out of the hunting life, and his mothering of Sam and most other children they come across, exemplify this. John seemed to see the parallels between his son and his wife, taking comfort from Dean after bad hunts and encouraging Dean's maternalistic protectiveness of Sam at all costs. Dean even wears his mother's wedding ring. Despite his love for his father Dean acknowledges, at least to himself, that John was never father of the year. It's only since Hell that Dean has really been working on the (figurative) scars John left on him.

(I could write whole essays on all this, but that would be even more tl;dr, so)

This mix deals with Dean's myriad of mommy and daddy issues. All songs are from his POV, with the exception of Hey Jude (we'll call that Mary's song). The first half deals mostly with Dean and Mary, and the second half mostly with Dean and John.

“It’s ok, Mom. Dad still loves you. I love you, too. I’ll never leave you.”

Hey Jude - The Beatles
And anytime you feel the pain, hey Jude, refrain.
Don’t carry the world up on your shoulders.
For well you know that it’s a fool who plays it cool
by making his world a little colder.
...
Hey Jude, don’t make it bad.
Take a sad song and make it better.

Wonderful - Everclear
I want the things that I had before,
like a Star Wars poster on my bedroom door.
I wish I could count to ten,
make everything be wonderful again.

All Alone - fun.
I fell in love with a wind-up souvenir.
I bought it downtown as I was on my way to meet you.
She sounds like the songs you used to sing to put me to sleep;
now that you’re gone, she’s all that I’ve left to hold.
And I feel so all alone.
No one’s gonna fix me when I’m broke.

Mama - My Chemical Romance
Well, Mother, what the war did to my legs and to my tongue,
you should’ve raised a baby girl, I should’ve been a better son.
If you could coddle the infection they can amputate at once.
You should’ve been, I could’ve been, a better son.
...
Mama, we all go to hell.

Please Don’t Leave Me - P!nk
Please don’t leave me.
Please don’t leave me.
I always say how I don’t need you
but it’s always gonna come right back to this.
Please don’t leave me.

Rootless - Marina and the Diamonds
I’ve got nowhere to go.
I’m a stray cat on the roam.
Choking on a chicken bone.
For a home sweet, no sweet home.
...
Running with my roots pulled up.
Caught me cold so they could cut
what there was left of love.
I’m rootless.

Half Jack - Dresden Dolls
And when I let him in I feel the stitches getting sicker.
I try to wash him out but like they say: the blood is thicker.
I see my mother in my face, but only when I travel.
I run as fast as I can run but Jack comes tumbling after.

Dilate - Ani DiFranco
I just want you to live up to
the image of you that I create.
I see you and I'm so unsatisfied,
I see you and I dilate.
So I’ll walk the plank and I’ll jump with a smile.
If I’m gonna go down I’m gonna do it with style.
And you won’t see me surrender, you won’t hear me confess.
‘Cuz you’ve left me with nothing, but I’ve worked with less.
...
The world is my oyster, the road is my home,
and I know that I’m better off alone.

Just In Case - Axium
Stranglehold of bend and fold
to feed your sense of self.
I spent my life to be your slave,
surrounded by myself.
To want someone to comprehend
is to want it all in gold.
I see myself in black and white,
beaten down and old.
Beaten down and old.
...
I’ve heard it all before,
I won’t preach it anymore,
life’s not made to waste.
So do what you can to be,
be who you want to be,
just in case.

SS
4s

Holmes Big Bang Art: for A Vast Profundity Obscure

2013-02-07T01:52:26Z

This is the art masterpost for The Vast Profundity Obscure by mistyzeo for the holmes_big_bang challange! The fic masterpost can be found here:

The Vast Profundity Obscure by mistyzeo

Two scenery pieces and one portrait of Holmes and Watson's daemons:

Round #11; Mythology - Selkies

2013-01-21T08:19:39Z

Fandom:Mythology/Folktales
Subject:Selkies
Title:Seal Girl
Warnings/Notes:Based mostly on traditional selkie tales, but with some influence from The Folk Keeper by Franny Billingsley (though no knowledge of the book is required to understand the mix and it makes no direct reference to it).

Selkies are seal people in the folklore of the Orkney Islands (selkie simply means 'seal' in the local dialect). They live in the water as seals most of the time, but occasionally they will come out of the water, shedding their seal skins, and dance on the beach or pursue lovers amongst the humans. If a selkie loses their seal skin, or a human steals it from them, they cannot return to the ocean until it is recovered. Many selkie stories are about selkie women who have had their seal skins stolen by opportunistic human men who then take the selkie as a wife.

This mix is one of those tales.

~
Sweet Water Kill (The Ocean Song) - Rasputina
Watching salt clouds billow, brimming and brand new.
Down below, I will follow, where bubbles tell me to.
All along, it was the ocean’s song that called me down to listen to her.
Swirling still, in a sweet water kill, a swiftly sifting riptide.

The ocean is her home. It's where she belongs and no matter how many times she goes ashore, the ocean always calls her back.
~

On An Unknown Beach - Amanda Palmer
I’m a pale intruder on an unknown beach.
My back to the water, my feet in the sand.
Needing no recognition as each sign of life
invades the precision of this aging land.
...
All interceding, not yet receding, misleading doubts in my mind.

Your Bones - Of Monsters And Men
Million stars up in the sky formed a tiger’s eye
that looked down on my face, out of time and out of place.
So hold on, hold on to what we are.
Hold on to your heart.

She's lost her seal skin. This is important: she has to remember who she is long enough to get it back. But her memories keep slipping away like the waves from the shore.
~

The Shore - Basia Bulat
There is no one who will take me by that shore.
But the wave’s rushing down,
the wave’s rushing down on your shoulders.
And if I am awake this time, this time I’ll know.
All over your eyes a storm is nearly over, nearly over.

Ocean Soul - Nightwish
Long hours of loneliness, between me and the sea.
Losing emotion. Finding devotion.
Should I dress in white and search the sea, as I always wish to be?
One with the waves, ocean soul.

She no longer remembers who she is. But a man has taken her in and made her his wife. He's promised to take care of her; his only caveat is that she not go down to the ocean. She feels such a strong draw to it, though, that keeping her promise seems almost impossible. The ocean holds the key to her identity, she's sure of it.
~

Blinding - Florence + The Machine
And I could hear the thunder and see the lightning crack.
All around the world was waking, I never could go back.
‘Cause all the walls of dreaming, they were torn wide open.
And finally it seemed that the spell was broken.
...
No more dreaming like a girl, so in love, so in love.
No more dreaming like a girl so in love with the wrong world.

It's been years since she's been down to the shore. One day, one of her children brings her a ratty old pelt that they'd found in the attic. As soon as she touches it, she remembers.
~

Timshel - Mumford & Sons
And you are the mother, the mother of your baby child,
the one to whom you gave life.
And you have your choices, and these are what make man great;
his ladder to the stars.

Now she has a choice.
~

Night After Night - Laura Marling
We dance the sorrow, forgive me tomorrow, I pray.
Night after night, day after day.
Would you watch my body weaken, my mind drift away?

She loved her husband, but now her image of him has become twisted with that of captor. If she stays, she will only pine for the ocean until she is withered to nothing but resentment and anger.
~

Swimming Home - Evanescence
I was looking to the sky when I knew I’d be swimming home.
And I cannot betray my kind, they are here - it’s my time.
I’m sorry. Nothing can hold me (do you really want me?).
I adore you still, but I hear them calling (calling)
and nothing can hold me.
~

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Round #10; His Dark Materials - Marisa Coulter

2012-12-23T06:30:19Z

Fandom: His Dark Materials
Subject: Marisa Coulter
Title: She's A Killer (Queen)
Warnings/Notes: For roslindi in the waywardmixes mix exchange! I hope you like it! Book based with spoilers for all three (although I kept the movie casting for the cover and some lyrics, as I feel Nicole Kidman makes the perfect Mrs. Coulter). I need to learn better coding so the presentation actually looks good...

“I told him I was going to betray you, and betray Lyra, and he believed me because I was corrupt and full of wickedness; he looked so deep I felt sure he’d see the truth. But I lied too well. I was lying with every nerve and fibre and everything I’d ever done… I wanted him to find no good in me, and he didn’t. There is none."

Marisa Coulter, or Mrs. Coulter as she is first introduced, is the mother of Lyra Belacqua, the main character in Philip Pullman’s His Dark Materials series. She is ostensibly one of the villains of the story, using whatever is at her disposal (from seduction to murder) to get what she wants. She gave Lyra up to be raised by the scholars at Oxford University while she went on to become a leading member of and kidnapper for the Oblation Board, the Church’s best kept secret in its supposed quest to end Dust and original sin. Mrs. Coulter is beautiful, a member of high society, calculating and ruthless, well-connected, and trusted by the Church; she has also kidnapped children for horrifying scientific experiments, murdered previous lovers, and made plans to kill her own child. However, throughout the series, she becomes attached to Lyra, in her own way, and goes from someone who would kill her own child without a second thought to someone who will literally snuff herself out of existence to save that same child.

"But I love Lyra. Where did this love come from? I don’t know; it came to me like a thief in the night, and now I love her so much my heart is bursting with it. All I could hope was that my crimes were so monstrous that the love was no bigger than a mustard-seed in the shadow of them, and I wished I’d committed even greater ones to hide it more deeply still… But the mustard-seed had taken root and was growing, and the little green shoot was splitting my heart wide open, and I was so afraid he’d see…”

The first half of this mix focuses solely on Mrs. Coulter, while the second half focuses more on her changing relationship with Lyra.

Bird Song - Florence + The Machine
I picked up the bird and above the din
I said “That’s the last song you’ll ever sing”.
Held him down, broke his neck,
taught him a lesson he wouldn’t forget.
But in my dreams began to creep
that old familiar tweet tweet tweet.

Cheap and Cheerful - The Kills
I’m bored of cheap and cheerful.
I want expensive sadness.
Hospital bills, parole,
open doors to madness.
...
It’s alright (it’s alright)
to be mean (to be mean).
It’s alright (it’s alright)
to be mean (to be mean).

Misery Loves Company - Emilie Autumn
It’s not the time. It’s not the place.
I’m just another pretty face,
so don’t come any closer.
You’re not the first, you’re not the last.
How many more? Don’t even ask.
You’re one more dead composer.

Vampyra - Inkubus Sukkubus
Come and suffer, come and bleed.
Give to me everything I need.
I will break your little heart,
tear your tiny soul apart.
...
Oh, I’m Lucifer in heels and fur;
my serpent kiss will never miss.
I’m Lilith with a killer kiss;
you’ll lose your mind while we’re entwined.
I’m Venus at her meanest.

Killer Queen - Queen
Caviar and cigarettes,
well versed in etiquette,
extraordinarily nice.
She’s a killer queen.
Gunpowder and gelatine,
dynamite with a laser beam.
Guaranteed to blow your mind,
anytime.

Viva La Vida - Lady Gaga (Coldplay cover)
Shattered windows and the sound of drums,
people couldn’t believe what I’d become.
Revolutionaries wait
for my, blond head on a silver plate.
Just a Gaga on a lonely string,
oh who would ever want to be queen?
...
For some reason I can’t explain,
I know Saint Mary won’t call my name.
Never an honest word,
but that was when I ruled the world.

I Am Not A Robot - Marina and the Diamonds
It’s ok to say you’ve got a weak spot.
You don’t always have to be on top.
Better to be hated
than loved, loved, loved for what you’re not.
You’re vulnerable, you’re vulnerable.
You are not a robot.

This Woman’s Work - Kate Bush
I should be crying, but I just can’t let it show.
I should be hoping, but I can’t stop thinking.
Of all the things I should’ve said that I never said.
All the things we should’ve done that we never did.
All the things I should’ve given but I didn’t.
...
(I know you have a little life in you yet.
I know you have a lot of strength left.)

Nothing Nowhere - Jakalope
Tears and dust burn me;
I’m so tired and weary.
I’ve put my feet down,
firmly, on the ground.
There’s no way to overcome
what I’ve done.
I’ve missed my step and lost
all control.

The Queen - Lady Gaga
Oh, tonight I’m gonna show
them what I’m made of, oh.
The killer queen inside of me’s
coming to say “hello!”
Oh, tonight I will return
the fame and riches earned.
With you I’d watch them all be burned.
...
I can be the queen that’s inside of me.
This is my chance to release and
be brave for you, you’ll see.
I can be the queen you need me to be.

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Round #9; Supernatural-Castiel/Balthazar

2012-11-21T05:40:56Z

Fandom:Supernatural
Subject:Castiel/Balthazar, season 6
Title:Mistakes Became Our Medicine
Warnings/Notes:potential/one-sided angelcest, fratricide?. These two are my OTP, and were almost the subject of my mix for last round, but I think they fit this one much better. I tried to tone down the shippy-ness, but, ya know, OTP feels might have gotten in the way, so I apologize for that. Feel free to interpret around that, if you don't like the ship.

Balthazar and Castiel are angels and brothers-in-arms. Castiel calls Balthazar ‘a good friend’ and grieved his supposed death, something he is not shown doing for other angels, and Balthazar has stood against Heaven for Castiel when he was dragged back for what amounts to angel reprogramming. I firmly believe that Balthazar is in love with Castiel, and Cas may or may not be on the same wavelength (though he also loves him, it may not be in the same way). This is the emotional backing for this mix, though I think it can be seen as simply two brothers if you want to look at it that way (just turn any mentions of love into brotherly love? I've done that before).

Balthazar skipped out of Heaven during the ongoing civil war, taking most of Heaven’s arsenal with him, and is presumed dead. Castiel finds him, however, and asks him to return and help fight in his war. Balthazar offers to help Cas but refuses to hand over the weapons, believing the fighting will never stop; somewhere along the line this changes and Balthazar ends up joining Castiel. It’s not until after this that Balthazar finds out Castiel has been working with Crowley, the king of Hell, in a potentially suicidal mission to find and open the doors to Purgatory and use the souls there as power in his war. Balthazar, out of a place of love and fear for Cas’ safety, turns double-agent and works with the Winchesters against Castiel’s plan. Castiel, however, finds out that, as he puts it, ‘there is a Judas in our midst’ and deduces that it is Balthazar. This betrayal by a trusted friend and brother only serves to increase his paranoia and further break him mentally (he was already broken, as he had previously shown no compunctions about killing other angels on his side if they went against his wishes) and he stabs Balthazar in the back, killing him.

This mix is organized so that each track alternates between Castiel’s and Balthazar’s point of view, starting with Castiel, and starts from their reunion then focuses mainly on the betrayal and killing from both perspectives.

***

I've been hearing all about you, and as far as I'm concerned, you and me, Cas, nothing's changed. We're brothers. Of course I want to help you.

Everlasting Friend - Blue October
Delay the hurtful words of complicated overcast.
Please take the message that I’m picking up my chin at last.
I said my confidence, it gets stronger when you’re next to me.
But we pray from miles away in quest for what we long to be.
...
I might crumble I might take a fall again but you’re my everlasting friend.

Distance - Christina Perri (ft. Jason Mraz)
And I keep waiting for you to take me.
You keep waiting to save what we have.
So I’ll make sure to keep my distance,
say ‘I love you’ when you’re not listening.
How long can we keep this up, up, up?

Set The Fire To The Third Bar - Snow Patrol (ft. Martha Wainwright)
I hang my coat up in the first bar.
There is no peace that I’ve found so far.
The laughter penetrates my silence
as drunken men find flaws in science.
Their words mostly noises.
Ghosts with just voices.
Your words in my memory
are like music to me.

Little Brother (Electric) - Grizzly Bear
Wide eyed and up in arms,
my little brother was a solemn one.
He always had his quiet corner.
Pride of my countrymen,
my little brother will be born again.
Just give us back our quiet corner.
...
My god, that’s not the way.
My god, that’s not the way.

Well did Cas tell you that he’s Crowley's butt-buddy, you smug little dick? Handshake deal. Go halfsies on all the souls of Purgatory. He fill you in on that?

9 Crimes (Demo) - Damien Rice
Leave me out with the waste this is not what I do.
It’s the wrong kind of place to be thinking of you.
It’s the wrong time for somebody new,
it’s a small crime and I’ve got no excuse.

Or too much juice for you, in which case you explode, taking a substantial chunk of the planet along with you....Just - just tell me that it's entirely risk-free.

Skinny Love - Bon Iver
And now all your love is wasted
and then who the hell was I?
And I’m breaking at the britches
and at the end of all your lines.
Who will love you? Who will fight?
Who will fall far behind?

The Scientist - Coldplay
Nobody said it was easy.
No one ever said it would be this hard.
Oh, take me back to the start.

I'm betraying a friend here. A very powerful friend. We all are.

Song To Say Goodbye - Placebo
I’m well aware of how it aches
and you still won’t let me in.
Now I’m breaking down your door
to try and save your swollen face.
Though I don’t like you anymore,
you lying, trying waste of space.
Before our innocence was lost
you were always one of those,
blessed with lucky sevens
and a voice that made me cry.
...
It’s a song to say goodbye.

Love Is All - The Tallest Man On Earth
And I’ll throw it in the current
that I stand upon so still,
love is all, from what I’ve heard,
but my heart’s learned to kill.
Oh, mine has learned to kill.

I’m Not Calling You A Liar - Florence + The Machine
I’m not calling you a liar, just don’t lie to me.
I’m not calling you a thief, just don’t steal from me.
I’m not calling you a ghost, just stop haunting me.
And I love you so much, I’m gonna let you kill me.
...
There but for the grace of God go I
and when you kiss me, I am happy enough to die.

Well you've - you've always got little old me.

No Light, No Light - Florence + The Machine
Would you leave me, if I told you what I’d done?
And would you need me, if I told you what I’ve become?
‘Cuz it’s so easy to say it to a crowd
but it’s so hard, my love, to say it to you out loud.
No light, no light in your bright blue eyes.
I never knew daylight could be so violent.
A revelation in the light of day,
you can’t choose what stays and what fades away.

Yes, I'll always have you.

Where Are You Now - Mumford & Sons
It came to the end, it seems you had heard.
As we walked the city streets you never said a word.
When we finally sat down your eyes were full of spite.
I was desperate, I was weak, I could not put up a fight.
But where are you now? Where are you now?
Do you ever think of me, in the quiet, in the crowd?

Zip!

So We Might Live Anew Part 4

2012-10-24T06:49:07Z

Sam comes to, and that’s his first clue that something went wrong. He’s pretty sure he was supposed to be sacrificed, which isn’t something one generally wakes up from. After coming to, he realizes three things: he’s soaked, he’s freezing, and there’s someone laying on top of him. He can feel the weight of a person on his chest, and the brush of damp hair against his chin. He really hopes it isn’t Lucifer, because that would be just his luck.

It’s light out now, so he must have been out for a few hours, at least. Above him, the sky is bright, and so light it’s nearly colorless. The body on top of him groans, and Sam pushes the person off of himself and sits up.

It turns out to be Gabriel, which is an improvement over Lucifer, definitely, but doesn’t really explain anything. It looks as though a small bomb went off in the surrounding area. The small clump of trees that had been some distance from the cliff face are uprooted and any grass or rocks that had been in the immediate vicinity are gone. In fact, the only things nearby are seaweed and a few dead fish that must have washed in with the giant wave. Which also explains why he and Gabriel are both wet, but not how they didn’t get dragged down with the wave.

“Ugh, someone get the number of that truck?” Gabriel asks, groggily, from beside Sam. He sits up. “I’m gonna be feeling that for a week.”

“Gabriel?” Sam asks, hope bleeding into his voice, “you’re ok?”

Gabriel frowns then, and it seems as though he’s inspecting himself internally. “We-ell...” he starts, and Sam’s hopes fall.

“Well, what?” Sam asks with some trepidation.

“Well, I don’t think I’m exactly an angel anymore.”

“What?” Sam says blankly, because if Gabriel’s not an angel, how’s he here? Is he human, now? Sam can’t really fathom that.

“I mean, when I saved your stupid self-sacrificing ass, I kinda died. A little. Apparently not entirely, since I’m still here, and-” he snaps his fingers and a Snickers bar appears in his hand. “And I still have some power. Just, y’know, I can’t feel any of my grace anymore. Must be down with Luci or something.” He shrugs. “Snickers?” he asks, offering it to Sam.

Sam stares. “Lucifer’s locked up again? And how can you do that if you don’t have any grace?”

“Yep, big bro’s locked up tight where only those assholes can get to him, now.” Gabriel smiles broadly, and just a little wickedly. “And hellooo, Trickster. You don’t spend centuries accepting sacrifices and playing tricks without getting some sort of benefit out of it. I’d been getting along just fine without using my grace before you came along, I’ll be just fine now.” He sounds just like he always has, but Sam can see Gabriel’s a little shaken to be here. Maybe he didn’t expect to survive this whole apocalypse thing.

Sam is forcefully reminded that Gabriel was only hanging around them because Sam is (was? he’s not sure) his vessel and needed to be protected. Now that that’s not an issue, Gabriel’s sure to leave and Sam realizes he doesn’t want that to happen. He likes Gabriel, likes his sense of humor and the annoying nicknames he comes up with for Sam and his obsession with sweet stuff. Likes his stupidly adorable smile and his stupidly attractive body and how despite his body’s size he radiates enough personality and power to make Sam forget their height difference.

But that doesn’t matter, he reminds himself. He’s not worthy of the attention of an archangel, even if said archangel is currently missing his angel-ness. Sam started the apocalypse, let Lucifer out of his cage of all things. He’s pretty sure that means he’s in for a lifetime of damnation.

“Well, thanks for saving me, I guess. You really didn’t have to, you know,” Sam tells Gabriel. “They weren’t going to come after you anymore.”

Gabriel rolls his eyes. “You really are a self-sacrificing idiot, aren’t you?” He grabs Sam’s chin and forces him to meet his eyes. “You’re only hearing this once, so listen good. I could no more have left you like that than I could willingly cease to exist. And I almost did, but it was for you, so.” His eyes are gentle, happy almost, reminding Sam of when Gabriel was just a janitor to whom he was inexplicably attracted. “You’re under my protection, kiddo. Can’t get rid of me so easily now.”

Sam freezes at this, and he knows he has that deer in the headlights look going on. This is what he wants, but he feels like he cheated somewhere, to get Gabriel like this. He can’t possibly deserve it.

“What?” Gabriel asks, dropping his hand to Sam’s leg.

“I’m not worth it, Gabriel. You don’t need to protect me anymore if you’re not an angel. And I’m tainted. Everything I did...”

Gabriel sighs. “We both have bloody pasts. Literally. Are you forgetting who you’re talking to? Blood sacrifices, virgin sacrifices, killing people in creative-yet-appropriate ways? If you think you’ve got a bad past, well...” he trails off pointedly. Sam gulps.

“You have a point,” he says. He sways, almost unconsciously, into Gabriel’s personal space. He can feel Gabriel’s breath on his cheek when he speaks.

“Hells yeah, I have a point. We’re just two lost sheep the shepherd hasn’t found yet.” He slides his hand up Sam’s leg slowly and Sam can feel every inch of it as it moves, every nerve in his body focusing on that touch. “Now, how about we get out of here, get dry, and do something a little more fun?”

And Gabriel referencing parables in a pick-up line only seems fitting, really. “Yeah,” Sam replies, “let’s go.”

end

So We Might Live Anew Part 3

2012-10-24T06:46:30Z

They arrive in that weird room again, where the angels apparently like to hide out. Gabriel isn’t there. A long couch and some chairs appear in the room, and Anna glares at them, gesturing to sit down while she prepares what appears to be the ingredients for a summoning. Sam and Dean sit in awkward silence on opposite ends of the room while Jo flops unceremoniously on the couch.

Anna throws the last of the ingredients in the bowl and mutters “You better get your asses over here, right now, boys.”

Gabriel and Castiel appear almost simultaneously in the room, looking concerned and slightly confused, respectively.

“Those two,” she gestures at Sam and Dean, “are idiots. And you two are even bigger idiots for letting them wander around without protection and get drawn in by some glamours.”

Castiel still looks confused, he obviously doesn’t have much experience with faeries, but Gabriel manages to look both contrite and pissed. It’s a weird expression.

“What did I tell you about being careful?” Gabriel says, stalking over to Sam and looming over him in his chair. “I can’t let them just take you! I thought you had more sense than that. I just-” he deflates, seeing Sam’s deer-in-the-headlights expression. “Nothing happened?”

Sam shakes his head mutely, momentarily struck dumb by the anger coming from the angel.

“I got them out of there before they could do anything completely stupid,” Anna says. “They’re just lucky we could afford to leave when we did.” She sits down on the couch next to Jo who sits up long enough for her to sit down and then flops herself back down in the same place, on top of Anna.

“We’re done with the whole spy thing, by the way,” Jo says from her place on Anna. “We finally figured out what they’re after. You’re welcome.”

“What is it?” Gabriel asks, not taking his eyes off of Sam as though trying to keep him there by force of will alone.

“A tithe,” Anna says, wearily, absently stroking Jo’s hair. “They’re not any more happy about this whole apocalypse thing than we are, and they think they have a plan to stop it.

“So do some of the other gods,” Gabriel says, “I’ve been listening in on ‘em since they stopped inviting me to their parties.”

“Yeah, but the faeries plan might actually work. They’re going to use one of us to lure in Michael or Lucifer, they’re not picky, and then use us as a tithe to open up the Otherworld and let whatever’s in there out long enough to drag whoever shows up, in.”

“So, it’s like locking Luci back up in Hell, only somewhere else?” Gabriel looks thoughtful. “That could work; the Otherworld’s even more impenetrable than Hell, anyway. Only, neither of us want to be tithes.”

“Uh, what’s a tithe?” Sam asks, interrupting them, “I’m guessing it has nothing to do with the church tithe.”

“A tithe, Samsquatch, in this instance is a sacrifice the faeries have to make every few years. Usually just for continued protection, but apparently they’re making different plans this time. It’s gotta be willing, or someone who owes them a debt, for maximum effectiveness.”

The conversation goes on for a while in that direction, and Sam lets his mind wander. This tithe plan seems as likely a plan as any they’ve had recently, more so, really. The body count’s racking up, and the longer they draw this out the more loved ones they’re going to lose. This whole thing’s his fault anyway; he couldn’t let things go (and now he realizes that’s what Gabriel was trying to teach him back before Dean went to Hell) and he broke the last seal. The least he can do is fix it, right? If it weren’t for him, neither Gabriel nor Anna would be on the run from all sides like this. Jo wouldn’t be hunted. None of this would be happening. If a tithe needs to be willing, well, he will be, he decides.

Sam settles back into his chair, his relief at having an honest-to-god workable plan lightening his mood considerably. He smiles at Gabriel, who’s sprawled in a chair beside him, legs over the armrest. Gabriel smiles back and kicks lightly at Sam. Yes, Sam thinks, this plan is best for everyone. No one else should have to die for his stupid mistakes. Especially not Gabriel.

It’s easier than Sam thought it would be to sneak away from Dean and the angels. He tells them he’s going across the street for some food and though Gabriel rolls his eyes and offers to snap up whatever they want right there, he lets Sam go.

Sam’s been preparing for this, and hustles as far away as he can so as not to draw suspicion while he attempts to summon a faerie. The ritual goes smoothly, and within minutes Sam’s surrounded by a small horde of short, squat, vaguely boulder-like creatures.

One steps forward. “Why would you summon us?” it asks, glancing around as if expecting some kind of trap.

“I’d like to speak to the queen,” Sam says, sure of this, at least. He’s been doing some research since that horrible faerie party, and he thinks he knows what’s what.

“Not a trap?” one of the other creatures asks.

“No, no trap, just y’know, take me to your leader,” Sam says, holding back a desperate laugh as the reality of the situation begins to intrude.

“Very well.”

A crack, and Sam’s suddenly in a dark, slightly damp, hall. The only light comes from a few lamps set up at one end, illuminating a throne and small table covered in food. On the throne sits one of the most beautiful women he’s ever seen, her dark hair done up over her head, on top of which sits a crown. Her eyes are dark and he can see them glitter from where he stands at the other end of the hall. She wears a slinky dress that shows off her body in ways that are almost obscene.

“Yes?” she says. She has a dark voice, one that suggests all manner of dangerous things in a single word.

“I have an offer to make.”

“Oh? Going to fetch me that pesky archangel of yours, are you? He’s been very entertaining, but I tire of his games.” She beckons Sam closer and he comes, unable to do anything but. He’s no longer susceptible to glamour, but the queen has other powers of persuasion open to her.

“No, I’m not giving you Gabriel,” Sam says, stopping in front of her, and he’s shocked at the angry, possessive tone in his voice that he can’t quite hold back. “He’s mine.” What the hell? Since when did he think of Gabriel as his? The archangel quite clearly belonged to nobody but himself.

“Then I’m afraid I don’t want anything else from you. Guards!” The guards snap to Sam’s side before he can blink. “Use him to get the angel. Do whatever you need to, have some fun with him, first.” She turns to the spread laid out before her and proceeds to ignore Sam.

“Wait!” Sam struggles against the guards, “you didn’t hear my offer!” The queen continues to ignore him.

“Take me as your tithe,” he says, still struggling.

The queen glances briefly at him before returning her attention to the food in front of her. It’s raw and bloody and glistens in the lamplight of the hall; Sam doesn’t look too closely, afraid of what it might turn out to be.

“I’m serious! You want Lucifer, Lucifer wants me; I can bring him to you.”

She turns, then, considering. “Hmm,” she purrs, “a willing sacrifice is very...appealing.” She smiles and her teeth glitter sharply.

There’s a crack, and Sam is standing on a cliff overlooking the ocean. It’s night, and the ocean below him looks like a field of grass blowing in the wind, not the deep water it almost definitely is. He can hear the dull roar of the waves crashing against the cliff. Up here, he can’t smell the sea breeze but he feels it, strong enough to push him around dangerously.

“Well, call him here, then. The sooner we get this done, the better,” the queen says from behind him. He turns to see her waiting some distance away, surrounded by a small entourage. This plan is looking less feasible now that it’s actually happening. He doesn’t know how to call Lucifer, let alone how to convince him to stay while the faeries work their sacrifice. But he can’t back out now, not when, if he does, the queen will just use him to get Gabriel anyway. He doesn’t even know where he is, there’s no way he could try running.

Sam turns back to face the ocean. He closes his eyes and tries calling for Lucifer through prayer. It’s a twisted way to call the devil, but he is an angel.

“Sam,” comes a smooth voice from behind him, “this is unexpected. Though I can’t say I’m not pleased. I always knew you’d come around, eventually.”

“Lucifer,” Sam breathes.

Sam’s been gone too long. Of course, ‘too long’ for Gabriel is anything longer than a second, but that’s beside the point. He knows something’s wrong; he can feel it, even if he can’t pinpoint what it is. Sam needs him, so he’s going to find him.

Gabriel starts his search in town. Down an alley a few blocks from where they’re staying he finds the remains of a summoning ritual. Shit. That means Sam went straight to those assholes. He can’t fathom why, but no matter the reason it can’t be good.

He calls Anna down; if anyone has any information on the faeries’ movements, it will be her. She’s less than pleased with Gabriel, however.

“You LOST Sam? Seriously, how are you an archangel? I mean, most angels lose their vessels, no big deal. But you, you lose yours and it’s the end of the world, literally!” She glares at him, and if he didn’t know he has more power than she ever will, he’d be properly worried about the force of the anger behind it and what she might do to him. As it is, he’s already working himself up into a slight panic (though he’d never let the worry show, he thinks, he has more self-control than that).

“Yes, I’m a horrible person and this is why we can’t have nice things,” he snarks to cover his concern. “Now, could you please just help me find him? You know those assholes movements and where they like to go better than anyone else by now; you’ve gotta have some idea of where they’d take him.”

She relents quickly, and he must not have been as good as he’d hoped at covering his worry (or she just knows him that well) because she reaches out with her own grace to press against his in a gesture of angelic comfort. “We’ll find him,” she promises, “and it won’t be too late.”

As it turns out, Anna knows more about the faeries and their preferred hiding spots than Gabriel ever thought existed. She takes them to what seems like an infinite amount of underground caverns, clear lakes, and groves in the middle of dense forest before they find where the faeries are. And though it only takes seconds when flying, it feels like an eternity to Gabriel, whose sense of foreboding continues to increase.

They have a plan in place for getting to Sam and getting him out of there, but it all flies out of Gabriel’s head the moment they appear on the cliff. All he can see is Sam and Lucifer. Lucifer’s standing close to Sam, touching him in ways that are entirely too familiar, and Gabriel loses it. Sam does not belong to Lucifer, no matter what the devil says, and Gabriel is not going to lose yet another person he loves to his tricky older brother and his stupid crusade.

In his peripheral vision he can see Anna doing something with the faeries, but he knows it’s too late. If Lucifer’s here, they’ve already started the tithing process (and Sam, stupid, self-sacrificing Sam, must have volunteered as the tithe to call Lucifer).

Lucifer is ignoring the faeries entirely, obviously not believing they could be a threat, and he hasn’t seen Gabriel or Anna yet. Gabriel thinks it would be so easy to swoop in and grab Sam, let Lucifer be the tithe and get locked up. And as much as it pains him to leave one of his brothers to that fate, it’s still preferable to any of their deaths.

He quickly realizes it’s too late for even that, however, as he hears the roar of a giant wave coming towards the cliff and he knows with a sickening certitude that this is what will take the tithe and anyone surrounding them down to the Otherworld. There’s no escaping it, and Gabriel never realized how fast waves moved until just now as he swoops down, invisibly, to where Sam and Lucifer stand in the path of the wave.

He can’t get Sam and himself out of there in time, but he won’t let Sam sacrifice himself if this is what it comes to. Gabriel covers Sam with all that he is as an archangel, spreading his wings out to close around him completely. This way, he hopes, Sam will be spared the brunt of what’s about to happen. The wave’s more metaphysical than physical, so it’s likely to just drag down the most powerful things in the vicinity and leave everything else. He only hopes...well, he can’t get his hopes up, he thinks. Not now.

The wave crests the edge of the cliff, so close Gabriel can feel its spray, and then it’s on them. And in that moment the archangel Gabriel -- dies.

Part 4

So We Might Live Anew Part 2

2012-10-24T06:40:26Z

Not that protecting his vessel matters, really, Gabriel thinks, snapping himself out of there. He’s been the Trickster for so long, he figures he wouldn’t be able to use a vessel at all. All he’s got left of his past life is a few annoying instincts and a more annoying family that he’s tried his damnedest to forget.

At this point, that he’s had a soft spot since they met for the boy who’s supposed to be the devil’s meatsuit is only ironic in that Alanis-Morissette-really-just-bad-luck way. He realizes it was probably just his grace trying to reach out to its vessel from behind centuries of blood sacrifices and Trickster’s judgements; it’s enough to make him feel thoroughly used, though there’s no one to blame for it.

He finds himself back in the haven he spent centuries building to perfection, infusing it with pagan spells for hiding and protection. The walls ripple as though he disturbed them with his arrival. Anna’s still there, sitting at a table and working out plans for her infiltration of Faerie. She smiles at him.

“It’s not the end of the world, you know.” She pauses. “Well, ok, it is, but you don’t need to look so down. We’ll figure this out. Besides, Heaven might still take you back. If anyone should be worried, it’s me.”

Gabriel rolls his eyes at her attempt to improve his mood. He snaps up a bowl of mint chocolate chip ice cream and plops down on a couch the room conveniently manifests for him.

“As if I’d want to go back to Heaven. I seriously doubt they’d welcome me with open arms; I’m not exactly the prodigal son, y’know. Too long slumming it down here, I’ve got human all over me or something.”

“I think you’ve got a particular human all over you,” Anna says cheekily, looking up from her plans.

Gabriel points his spoon at her and half-heartedly glares before returning to his ice cream. She has a point, but whatever. Just because she has a clean slate with her vessel (and that’s an intimate relationship, isn’t it? being made to have another being inside of you) and has a much better chance of having a good relationship with her doesn’t mean he’s going to. He’s only going to keep an eye on Sam so those assholes can’t get him. It doesn’t have to mean anything. He doesn’t see much more of Anna for a while after that.

Things seem to go on as normal for Sam and Dean (or, as normal as things can be when the Apocalypse is happening). Except, Gabriel keeps turning up when hunts go bad. He’s helpful, in the way that an attack cat is helpful, which means he keeps Sam from dying and occasionally ganks something in some way that manages to be both horrifying and hilarious. Most of the time, Sam just knows he’s there, can sense his presence (which is weird, and when did he get freaky archangel sensing powers?). He’s not sure why Gabriel shows up those times, but it is kind of nice knowing there’s someone there who’s not immediately out to kill him.

A few weeks after Carthage, they run into Meg. Apparently, she’d been looking forward to seeing them there, which Sam takes to mean she was looking forward to torturing them gruesomely and then turning them over to Lucifer. She is a demon, after all.

She’s got Sam tied up and woozy and Dean knocked out, and Sam remembers he still hasn’t talked with her about that whole possessing him thing she did years ago. It’s a weird thought, but he is the potential meatsuit for her boss; he wonders if that would make things awkward between them and if there’s a protocol to follow there. Then he realizes this is not the most productive line of thought, but he’s a hair’s breadth from passing out here, so he thinks it can be excused.

Sam thinks this would be a good time for Gabriel to show up, and then suddenly he’s there. A breeze blows through the room and Meg is gone along with her goons.

“We gotta stop meeting like this, kiddo,” Gabriel says in Sam’s ear, and Sam blacks out.

He comes to, blinking away memories of a dream where he’d lost...something (a coin?), and was frantically searching for it. He and Dean are back in their motel room, Dean still passed out, and Gabriel is building a castle out of unnaturally bright cupcakes. There’s even a moat with a drawbridge made of licorice sticks. Castiel is hovering by Dean’s bed and staring suspiciously at the rainbow of cupcakes.

Sam would never admit it, but he likes coming to after a bad job (and let’s face it, they’ve been getting worse as the Apocalypse continues) and seeing Gabriel there, just because he wants to be. He tells Sam it’s because he’s got nothing better to do, but Sam thinks it’s really because he’s lonely. Gabriel’s been apart from anyone who knows the real him for millennia; Sam remembers how it feels to cut all ties to your old life, to not be able to talk to anyone about who you used to be. It’s a particular kind of loneliness when even those you’re closest to can’t know the real you.

“Well, since you’re now awake, Samsquatch, I’m going to leave you boys to whatever it is you do,” Gabriel says when he notices that Sam’s regained consciousness. “Love to stick around and chat, but you know how it is, things to see, people to do.” He winks, and snaps himself away.

Sam’s a little disappointed that Gabriel never seems to stick around.

They’re on a hunt when it happens. Of course, they’re always on a hunt it seems, so it’s not that much of a shocker. At first Sam had thought it was a mermaid (which had amused Dean to no end), now he’s not so sure. It’s the middle of winter and there’d been six drownings in the past week; all that had been found were the victims’ livers, floating in the lake in the middle of town.

They’ve split up, Dean talking to the victims’ families, Sam researching in the little museum set up down by the lake, when he hears it. It starts out softly, and he puts it out of his mind as the background music they tend to play in places like this. It’s got a haunting, longing sound to it, though, and as the minutes drag by the music only grows louder. It gets into Sam’s head in a way he can’t fully articulate, and before he knows it Sam’s out of the museum and walking towards the lakeshore.

It’s a cloudy day, snow on the ground, but the lake isn’t frozen over yet; his breath puffs out in little clouds in front of him. As he gets nearer the lake, the music grows louder, more insistent. It fills his head completely and the only thing he wants to do is go to whoever is playing this music, to be with them so they aren’t so lonely.

The music draws him around the lake towards a small inlet, hidden by a stand of pine trees. A man is there, violin in hand, obviously the source of the music. He sees Sam and stops playing, but the music lingers on, keeping Sam entranced. The man smiles and it’s all teeth.

“I was hoping you’d show up,” he says, voice lilting with an accent Sam can’t place. “You don’t know how difficult it is to get to you, do you? We’ve been trying for weeks. We need you, or, rather, we need what you can get us.”

The music’s still echoing in Sam’s head and the man looks so earnest, so beseeching, Sam wants desperately to help him with whatever he’s after. “Anything,” he tells the man, “just tell me what you need. I’ll do it.” The urge to prostrate himself in front of this man in supplication, in offering, is almost overwhelming but deeply ingrained instincts against just that fight him every step of the way.

The man grins wildly then, his face twisting so he looks more creature than human. He’s suddenly in Sam’s face as though the distance between them was never there; he’s as tall as Sam, but deceptively thin for all the strength with which he grabs Sam’s arm. He can feel the bones grind against each other, and he knows this should worry him, but he can’t seem to muster up any care.

“Just stand there,” the man says, sliding one hand over Sam’s chest, “I’ll do all the work. He’ll have to come, this way.” With that, the man (monster! Sam’s mind tries to interject) presses his fingers into Sam’s stomach, just under his ribs. He pushes up and in, and blood starts to ooze down the man’s arm but he must be working some kind of pain control mojo, because Sam can’t feel a thing. He notes absently that the man’s mouth is widening beyond normal human proportions.

“Just need to remove that pesky liver,” the thing says, “carries too many toxins for my taste. Don’t worry, I’m sure--”

A bright flash is followed by a thunderclap and then the thing is gone, the only proof that it was there the hole in Sam’s gut, currently being held closed by a pissed off archangel.

“Are you an idiot?! No, don’t answer that, of course you are. When those asshole faeries are after you, why would you ever think it’s a good idea to go around unprotected? You might have a death wish, but I don’t.” Gabriel goes on for a while in that vein, but Sam tunes him out as he slowly comes out of the trance that thing had put him in.

“Gabriel,” he interrupts with a gasp when the pain hits, “you think you could fix me up?”

“Not like I have much of a choice, do I? You Winchesters are always in need of saving - worse than that Daphne chick, I swear,” Gabriel complains, though he’s gentle when he fixes the hole in Sam, his touch lingering longer than is strictly necessary. “Thought you’d be more prepared than that, though. Have some anti-faerie stuff going for you or something.” He rolls his eyes.

Sam lifts his shirts to check where the hole had been, but he’s completely healed. “I was prepared - am prepared. Got iron, salt to spill, the whole deal. What was that thing?” He gestures in the direction of where the creature had been.

“Iron and salt only help you if you can use ‘em. If they get you enchanted first, you’re screwed, and not in the fun way.” Gabriel looks thoughtful. “Well, usually not in the fun way.

“Anyway, that was a nix. It’ll get you with it’s music, and before you know it, all that’s left of you is a liver out in that lake. Pretty nasty things, could have got me if I wasn’t expecting it. But, you know, I was, which is the whole point. I obviously can’t leave you alone anymore, since I’m the only one who seems to care about your safety here.”

The idea that Gabriel cares about his safety warms Sam, though he supposes he should have realized it sooner. The angel had been showing up more and more often to get them out of bad spots, and been staying afterwards longer each time. It makes him feel like Gabriel thinks of him as more than a potential meatsuit, which he hopes is true. Either way, Gabriel’s attention feels much better than anything Lucifer’s ever tried to get him to say yes. And Gabriel’s not even trying to convince him to do anything, anymore.

“But if I was more careful, you wouldn’t need to come around anymore and I’d miss your hilarious sense of humor,” Sam says, simperingly.

“Well, we can’t have that, now can we?” Gabriel smirks, and Sam is only slightly surprised to be bantering with an archangel.

“If you didn’t check up on me, I might just need to go looking for Lucifer to fulfill my angelic needs.”

Gabriel’s face shuts down immediately, any trace of humor gone at that statement and Sam knows he said something wrong. “No,” he says harshly, “that won’t be happening. Ever. He can’t take you; I won’t let him.” His presence seems to increase to fill the entire clearing and Sam doesn’t know whether it’s the Trickster-God or the archangel making this declaration; he’s never seen angels be possessive like this but Gabriel seems to defy most angelic behavior.

“Ok,” Sam says, watching Gabriel’s face carefully, “ok.”

After that, Gabriel sticks with them most of the time. He leaves at night though, because, he says, angels don’t sleep and sleeping people are boring. As luck would have it, then, the next time the faeries come for Sam is at night.

Cas is off on another hunt for God. Sam and Dean are just coming back to their motel after yet another salt’n’burn when the lights appear. They’re small specks of light, floating off towards the marshy area behind the motel, almost like ghost orbs except they can see them with their bare eyes. Dean gestures in their direction, mouthing that they should check them out and Sam sighs but goes along with it. They’re still armed from the recent ghost hunt; what’s the worst that could happen?

The lights lead them around the swamp to a small hill covered in thorn bushes. There’s a square of light shining out of the hill, which is something Sam never thought he’d see. He’s reminded of hobbits living in hills, but knows they’re not real. The lights are mesmerizing, as is the light, and now the sounds of a wild party are coming out of the hill. Both he and Dean are drawn irresistibly towards it.

As they approach, beautiful, but only vaguely human shaped, creatures appear out of the side of the hill, beckoning them further in. If either of them were in their right minds, this would be the point at which they turned tail and ran the opposite direction; this is obviously a gathering of supernatural creatures and all they’re prepared for is some ghosts at best. But the lights have woven some sort of spell over them, and any thoughts of fleeing are pushed out of their minds before they can fully arrive.

Inside, the hill is hollowed out. Tables groaning with food line the walls. Beautiful creatures of all shapes and sizes mingle in the middle of the floor, dancing or talking. Lights like the ones they followed hover over the festivities, giving an ethereal glow to the whole thing.

“Dude, this is awesome,” Dean says, and Sam has to agree. He feels like he’s forgetting something, but whatever it is slips away from him. Whatever, it must not be that important, he thinks.

“I’m gonna go check out the food,” Dean tells Sam, already walking that way. Sam follows.

The food looks amazing. He doesn’t recognize most of it, but he sees various meats piled high on one end of a table. Another table is covered in various types of fruit, many of which he’s never seen before; it’s by far the most colorful table, and the most tempting to Sam. Dean, of course, immediately heads to a table that’s loaded down with what looks like pies and puddings.

“Well, well, well, what do we have here?” comes a slick voice from behind Sam. “I don’t think I’ve seen you here before...” the voice trails off, obviously waiting for Sam to respond. He turns to see a small man, dressed to the nines in a deep, almost blood, red old English officers’ outfit. The man’s dark hair is covered with a three-cornered hat, and he grins widely at Sam, offering his hand. Out of the corner of his eye, Sam sees Dean is also being approached by someone, a lady in a green dress with so many ruffles he can barely see her body.

“Um, I’m Sam,” he tells the man, taking the offered hand. The man, instead of shaking his hand as Sam expects, turns it and kisses the back with a little flourish and bow. Sam blushes and stutters out, “uh...pleased to meet you?”

“Oh, the pleasure is all mine, I assure you,” the man responds, looking Sam over in a way that’s almost hungry.

“This one’s mine, Seamus,” interrupts the woman that had been talking to Dean. “He’s got a brother; I’m taking them both for the night.” She grins wickedly, and Sam begins to feel a little of that nervousness he probably should have felt earlier.

Seamus pouts a little, but capitulates easily to the woman’s request. She leads both Sam and Dean over to a mostly unoccupied part of the dance floor where another woman stands, obviously waiting for them.

“Um, ladies, I don’t-” Sam starts, when the first woman taps both he and Dean in the middle of the forehead. Sam blinks, startled, to see Anna and Jo where the two ladies had been. “What was that?”

“I gave you a bit of the Sight, so you can see through faerie glamour,” Anna says, crossing her arms over her chest. “I can’t believe you boys fell for it that easily; we’re going to have to discuss your gullibility. Later. Now, take a good look at where you actually are.”

They turn around and Sam blanches. Dean gags. The creatures are no longer beautiful; most of them have claws, and mouths wider than their faces really should allow. Some look like they’re made of tree bark while others are shaped more like boulders with a faint mossy covering. A few have hollow backs showing through their tattered clothes. Others have the legs of deer or the snapping faces of birds of prey. The food tables are still covered, but now Sam can see that the meat looks suspiciously human and the fruits are all rotten. The desserts are similarly bloody or covered in Sam doesn’t even want to know what.

“I almost ate that!” Dean exclaims, disgusted.

“Yes, but I got to you before you could be so stupid, so,” Anna replies, shrugging.

“This is what you guys have been doing this whole time? Going to these things?” Sam asks.

“Yep, and let me tell you, you’ve got it easy out there,” Jo says. “You’re still hunting, not being hunted; I hate having to be on the other side of the equation. If it wasn’t for Anna, I’d have gone crazy with all these...things around.” She smiles softly and grabs Anna’s hand.

“But now we’ve got to get you guys out of here without causing too much trouble. Just play along,” Anna says, squeezing Jo’s hand in return. Jo practically glows at Anna’s attention, and Sam is suddenly jealous of their connection. Why can’t he be that close with Gabriel? But he dismisses the jealousy quickly and turns his attention back to Anna.

“We’re gonna have so much fun together, aren’t we boys?” she’s saying, leading them back towards the entrance.

“Definitely,” Jo joins in, “do you have one in mind, or should we share?” she says, turning to Anna. Anna gives them both an appraising look.

“I think we should share this time, make it more...interesting since they’re brothers.” They both grin wickedly at that, sharing a look.

Finally, they’re out of the hill. Anna and Jo lead the boys around to the backside of it before Anna zaps them away.

Part 3

So We Might live Anew, Part 1

2012-10-24T06:24:30Z

So We Might Live Anew

Arriving in town, everything is eerily silent. Cas had said something about the town being filled with Reapers and then disappeared to god-knows-where to check it out. The quiet they’re walking through now is not the silence of empty buildings and lack of people; Sam could swear they’re being watched, and by something more than Reapers. Jo seems to feel the same. More than once she’s whipped around suddenly, as though trying to catch something sneaking up on her.

It’s after they’ve passed the third car abandoned in the middle of the street that Sam hears, more than feels, something whizz past his head. A second later, Jo gives a quick, pained grunt; whatever had almost hit Sam must have had more luck with Jo. Sam spins around, already trying to trace the path of the attack back before he spots Jo. She’s crumpled on the ground, hands convulsively attempting to clench around her leg but being driven off by bouts of apparently excruciating pain.

Well, shit.

“H-hurts,” Jo grunts out, causing the rest of the group to focus on her as well. Sam is the first to Jo’s side, immediately locating the...nonexistent wound? It’s obvious where the wound should be, and Sam knows he heard something fly in her direction, but he can’t find anything physically wrong with her, nor any evidence that anything had actually touched her.

It’s at that moment that he hears the unmistakable sound of an angel arriving in their midst, having learned to recognize it from Castiel’s sudden and frequent appearances.

“Cas!-,” he starts, hoping Cas can tell them what the hell is wrong with Jo, but the words die on his tongue as he turns. It isn’t Cas standing there, but Anna, looking every part the avenging angel she’d once been. Anna, who they hadn’t seen in months and who Cas said had been taken back to Heaven for angel reprogramming.

Her eyes catch on Jo and she takes a step towards her. Then, as though forcing herself, Anna wrenches herself away, circling the group. They sit in several seconds of stunned silence at her sudden appearance as Anna scans the nearby buildings, obviously looking for something or someone.

“We have to get out of here, now,” she tells the group with expectant authority. She holds up a hand to silence Dean and Ellen’s protests. “It’ll be faster if I take us.”

Sam feels the world shifting around him (or was he shifting through the world? Whatever, travel-by-angel always confused him) and everything comes back into focus to the familiar sounds of Dean’s cursing.

They’re in what looks like a fairly nice room, but the edges don’t seem to really be there. It’s like looking through water, the walls shifting constantly but minutely; as if the room is only holding its shape for the moment but will change on you without warning when it feels like it. Sentient rooms aren’t really up there in weirdest-things-Sam-Winchester-has-experienced though, so he ignores it in favor of what brought them there in the first place.

Anna is focusing intently on Jo, who can’t seem to decide whether she should be wary of the stranger who just abducted her or curl herself around the pain in her leg. Ellen is hunched over her daughter, whispering comforting words.

“Don’t worry, I’m an angel,” Anna tells her, smiling. This doesn’t seem to endear her to Jo, who glares back. “Ok, yeah, I wouldn’t trust me either, I guess,” she says, letting out a small, amused huff, “but I’m really your best bet right now. So, will you let me get with the laying-on-of-hands here?”

“Wait a minute! Last we heard of you, Anna, Cas said you were getting some angel reprogramming shit or something. And let me tell you, Cas did not come back from that in a very helpful mood. So excuse us for not exactly trusting you,” Dean stops his grumbling to say. As he talks, he backs Anna up towards the wall and away from the rest of the group.

Anna narrows her eyes at the mention of Cas but lets Dean back her up, as though trying to placate him. “Yeah, Cas would know all about that, wouldn’t he?” she says bitterly. “I got away from the goon squad before they could get me back to Heaven. Believe you me, I was not gonna let them get me after all I’d done to get away.”

Despite being backed against the shifting wall, Anna’s presence seems to expand to take up the whole room. Sam is impressed that Dean’s not backing down, but then, his self-preservation instincts have always been a bit lacking when it comes to angels. Sam feels the urge to hunker down and let Anna do whatever she wants. The command he feels from her presence makes him realize how much Cas has been powered down; it’s a depressing realization.

“Now, will you let me help Jo, there, or will I have to send you back to the Hellhounds in Carthage?” Anna is deadly serious now, no trace of humor in her face. Dean relents, though Sam isn’t sure whether it’s from the threat of Hellhounds or the threat of a fully powered angel.

“Just get on with it, then.”

“Uh, Dean? I’m a big girl; I can make my own decisions,” Jo grits out, breathing hard. “I don’t know who this is or how she knows me, but you obviously do. And right now, I would almost trust the devil himself if he said he could help me out.” And that seems to sell it for Dean, concern for Jo overriding his doubts about Anna.

“I’m Anna, an angel. These knuckleheads helped me get my grace back about a year ago, and I’m here to help you now. The rest can wait,” Anna tells Jo and Ellen. “So, can anyone tell me what happened out there?” Anna asks the group. As she speaks, she makes her way over to Jo, giving her a clinical once-over.

“Not really,” Jo starts, then she doubles over with a pained cry. “It’s spreading,” she manages to say through clenched teeth. Anna moves to help support her, but Ellen manages to glare her down.

“You’re not touching my daughter until you’ve told us what’s wrong with her,” she says, arms tightening around Jo.

Since no one else seems to be volunteering any information on what happened, Sam decides to step up on that front.

“Well, I didn’t really see anything, but I heard something fly by my head, sounded kind of like an arrow, and then I heard Jo go down. I got to her first, but I couldn’t find a wound or anything that would explain the pain.” Jo is nodding along with his recounting of the events, though the pain is apparently still too much to let her speak. “And then you showed up, Anna, and zapped us here,” he finishes.

Anna frowns in concentration and then looks at Jo again, this time as though she’s looking through her. Slowly the color drains from her face and a look of realization emerges. She looks at Sam.

“You said you heard it, too?”

“Uh, yeah?” he replies, confused. As soon as the words leave his mouth, she’s gone. That can’t be good. Seconds later she’s back with, of all people, the newly revealed Gabriel. The hell?

“What the hell’s the Trickster doing here, Anna?” Dean growls, fists clenching but otherwise holding himself back from trying to attack the guy.

“She’s been elf-shot,” Anna tells Gabriel, ignoring Dean. “Sam heard it before she was hit.”

His eyes widen as he takes in the image of Jo, crumpled on the floor. “That’s really bad timing on their part. I’ll be right back.”

“Hey!” Dean starts, but Gabriel snaps himself out before he can grab him. Dean growls. “What the hell’s ‘elf-shot’ mean?” he snaps, rounding on Anna.

“It means,” Anna says, keeping her eyes on Jo, “she was shot by an elf. The arrows are imperceptible to humans, but the poison on the tip works on nearly everything. If it’s left in for too long it will slowly and painfully eat you from the inside out. Now, if you don’t mind, I’m going to remove it.” She glares pointedly at Ellen who’s still cradling Jo.

“Mom, just let her fix me up,” Jo manages to say. At Jo’s insistence Ellen relents a little and nods Anna over to them.

The healing is fairly underwhelming. Anna sort of reaches into Jo and they both glow brightly for a second before she pulls out an invisible something. She holds the whatever-it-is up to the light, inspecting it, as Jo gasps (in relief or in further pain, Sam can’t tell). Anna disappears the object in another flash of light. She then turns to Jo and passes a hand over her lower body, healing apparently complete.

“What the hell was that?” Jo breathes.

Anna shrugs. “That was an elf arrow. But I pulled it out and stopped the poison, so it’s all good now.”

“Elf arrow?” Sam asks. “Like, Legolas or something? I thought Tolkien made them up, like hobbits and ents.” He ignores Dean’s snort of ‘nerd’.

“A little less Tolkien and a little more Keebler elf gone postal,” comes Gabriel’s voice from behind the group, “but close enough, I guess.”

“Wait, so elves are real?” Sam asks incredulously.

“Elves, faeries, the good folk, those assholes under the hill, whatever you want to call ‘em,” Gabriel says, waving a hand dismissively.

“And why the hell’d they shoot Jo?” Dean asks, though he stays at a distance, perhaps realizing he’s reliant on the good graces of the archangel to get out of here. “Are they working for Lucifer?”

Gabriel snorts at that. “Faeries working for an angel? Yeah, right. They’d sooner shove him back into the Pit than help him.”

“They were trying to get to me,” Anna says, rolling her eyes at Gabriel. “It’s kind of a long story.”

“Then you’d better start explaining, because I’ve never even met you,” Jo says. “Most of the time, that means I wouldn’t be a target, but obviously something’s different about this.”

Anna sighs. “Well, to start off, I’m an angel. Most of the time, that means you need to take a vessel to walk around down here with you humans. I kind of...went a different route. I ripped my grace out and came down here a while ago. Got a human body and forgot everything about being an angel. When the angels started coming back down to Earth, I started hearing them. Went a little crazy about it. Then these guys,” she gestures to Sam and Dean, “found me. They helped me find my grace; in the process of reabsorbing it, my original body was destroyed and I went on the run from the rest of the Host. I knew they could track me through my vessel, and I’m kind of opposed to the whole idea now anyway, having been as human as an angel can get; vessels give up too much for us, you know?” She shrugs. “But I’m not the only angel to hide from the Host, and I found one who owed me a favor.” At this, she glances over at Gabriel, smirking. There are eons of familiarity in that smirk, and a sudden burst of irrational jealousy flashes through Sam. And that, he thinks, is even weirder than elves being real because what is there to be jealous of?

“Hey, I helped out of the kindness of my heart!” Gabriel protests, pouting.

“Yeah, and the fact that I had a bit of leverage over you didn’t really hurt, did it?” Anna says, cocking an eyebrow.

“Not at all, I could see the advantages and worked in both of our best interests, that’s all,” Gabriel replies, innuendo insinuating itself into every syllable. Anna rolls her eyes.

“Hey, guys? Can we get back to why there are apparently elves after me? Thanks,” Jo says. Sam’s grateful for the interruption to their banter, which is making him more uncomfortable by the second.

“Uh, yeah, sorry,” Anna says. “So, Gabriel owed me. They’d all said he was dead, but I had some suspicions and I decided to search him out. Found him working as a Trickster with an entirely pagan-built body and asked him to help me do the same. Turns out, he got the body from the faeries; it’s kind of their specialty, I guess. He helped me make the same kind of deal with them, and here I am.” At this, she spreads her arms in a weird kind of ta-da! flourish.

“So, now the kind of awkward part, I guess. Well, this whole deal thing means we owe them. They were going to hold the collection of their debt off indefinitely, but it seems they want to collect now. Even though they made this body, I can still hide from them, especially here. Only me and Gabriel know how to get here, and it’s staying that way. So, to draw me out, they’ve apparently decided to go through you, Jo.” Anna’s eyes dart around now, looking at anything but Jo. “Which works because I’m kind of drawn to protect you,” she draws in a deep breath and lets it out slowly before saying, “since, um, you’re my true vessel.”

It takes a moment for the group to process what she’s said. “You--me--what?” Jo stutters out.

“It doesn’t carry any obligation on your part!” Anna rushes to explain. “It’s just untapped potential, but I would never ask anything of you because of it.” She’s tense, as though she expects Jo to lash out at her in some way.

Jo remains silent, mouth open, gaping at Anna.

“Ok, so that explains why you’re here, Anna,” says Sam, interrupting the awkward silence, “but why’d you bring Gabriel? I mean, is it just because of the whole faery thing, or is there something else?” Because with Gabriel, there’s always something else.

At this, Gabriel is suddenly very interested in the far wall and Anna’s face turns beet-red.

“Um, well, actually,” Anna says, looking incredibly uncomfortable, “you said you heard the arrow, right?” Sam nods. “Yeah, so, elf-arrows are pretty nifty things, actually. Only the people they’re intended to harm can hear them or will get hit by them. Faeries are all about collateral damage most of the time, but they can’t just have random people getting shot up by something so specialized. Ruins their street cred in the Faery Market. Which is basically the monster black market,” she adds, seeing their confusion.

“So they were trying to hit me?” Sam asks, incredulously.

“And here I thought you were the smart one,” Gabriel says. “I guess you really can get by on moose-y good looks alone.”

“But why would they go for me? I mean, unless they’re going after Lucifer, but then why’d Anna bring you here? But...” Sam trails off, sudden comprehension dawning. “I’m your vessel?”

“Give the boy a medal! He’s got it in one!” Gabriel snarks, though he looks as though he wants nothing more than to run.

“But, Lucifer said-”

“But Lucifer nothing,” Gabriel says. “He’s not called the Prince of Lies for nothing. You think that dose of demon blood when you were a baby was for fun? Luci didn’t have any vessel left for him; that line was left to die out. You think we’re stupid? He had to make a vessel for himself, got a whole line-up and had ‘em fight it out so he could take the strongest one. And he always did like taking things from his little brother.” At this, Gabriel’s voice goes slightly bitter.

“But I’m not gonna let him take you. That would spell all kinds of trouble for me. Besides,” he grins at Sam, “you’re not without your merits. I mean, who else can I use as my personal moose?”

“You’re going to stick around? Help us?” Sam asks, hopefully.

“Woah, I wouldn’t go that far, kiddo. I’m still not gonna fight it out with you guys. Let’s just say I’m a little less inclined to get you to say yes to ol’ Luci. I’m not sure what those asshole faeries are playing at, trying to collect on their debt now, but their timing is horrible, as always.”

“We should try and find out what they’re after, actually,” Anna says, interrupting the conversation.

“Oh, yeah, like I’m just gonna walk into the queen’s court and ask what they want. I’m sure that won’t end in her just taking whatever it is she wants or anything,” Gabriel replies, sarcasm dripping from every word.

Anna looks thoughtful. “Actually, that’s not an entirely bad idea. I mean, yeah, going in there as ourselves wouldn’t work, but we could sneak in and scope out what they’re up to. They’d never expect us to actually be there, right?”

“Yeah, you go play spies if you want, I’m staying out here,” Gabriel says, crossing his arms over his chest. Sam almost expects him to stomp his foot while he’s at it.

Jo, who through the entire discussion has remained quietly on the ground, digesting the new information, speaks up at this. “How about if I went with you?” she asks Anna.

“Joanna Beth Harvelle-,” Ellen starts, warningly, but Jo interrupts her.

“Mom, I want to do this. I need to pay it back to those bastards that did this to me,” she gestures at her lower body where she’d been elf-shot. “Besides, I’ll be fine. I’ll have a guardian angel, after all, right?” She glances up at Anna, who hesitates before nodding.

“I don’t like you going straight into the den of whatever’s after you,” Ellen starts. Jo crosses her arms and glares at her mother. “But, we’ve been hunting together for a while now. I know I can’t stop you from doing what you think is best, and if I tried you’d just go ahead and do it anyway.” She folds Jo into a tight hug and continues, “Mother’s worry, is all.”

Watching them, Sam misses the mother he never really had. Sure, his father had cared enough to keep him alive, but that isn’t the same. Dean’s the closest he’s ever had to a mother figure, and that’s all kinds of messed up, really.

Ellen turns a glare on Anna. “You’ll keep her safe?”

“I couldn’t do anything else.”

“Fine,” she nods. “Just be careful.”

“Ok, now that the caring and sharing’s all done, let’s get you people out of here,” Gabriel says, clapping his hands together decisively. He snaps, and they’re back outside Bobby’s, where they started this doomed mission in the first place.

“Hey, we had plans back in Carthage!” Dean says, whirling on Gabriel.

“Oh, yeah, that thing with the gun, right? Won’t work,” Gabriel says, shrugging. “There’s only five things that gun can’t kill, and archangels are in that set. You could test it if you want, but it’ll only annoy me, so...”

“Don’t tempt me,” Dean says, brandishing it in Gabriel’s face, but he seems to be telling the truth if his unconcern means anything. “What about Cas? We left him back in Carthage, too.” Dean’s concern over the angel shows on his face. “What if he ran into Lucifer?”

“He did, but he’s fine,” Gabriel says, waving a hand. “I popped him back here after I found him in a ring of holy fire on my little excursion down that way.”

Dean blanches and vanishes into Bobby’s, probably to check on Cas; Jo and Ellen follow him. But Sam grabs Gabriel’s arm before he can snap himself back to his hidey-hole. “Hold on, I still have some questions about all this.”

“Yes, Sammy, you are the specialist of snowflakes and I want to pet you and hug you and love you and call you George,” says Gabriel, rolling his eyes so hard Sam’s almost surprised they don’t fall out of his head (he suspects that’s something Gabriel might actually do, for effect, one of these times).

“What? No! Wait, what?” Gabriel’s ability to fluster Sam seems to be in top form today, which really doesn’t bode well for this conversation. “I mean, I wanted to know what you’re really going after here. Why the help?”

“Because, Sam,” Gabriel starts, face completely serious, “you’re my snoogums and I wuv you.”

“Quit that! Can you be serious for one moment in your stupid life? Don’t answer that. I just want to know what your endgame is, because you always have one. Every time I see you, you have some sort of something you’re trying to get out of us. I just can’t believe it’s any different this time.”

“Well, I don’t, this time. Except the whole not letting those assholes get to me through you thing, but we already covered that, so...” he trails off, pointedly looking at his arm where Sam’s still holding on to him. Sam pointedly holds on.

“Then tell me what my being your vessel means, exactly. Lucifer told me I was made for him, which, I guess he meant literally. I just want to know what this means to you.” As Sam speaks, Gabriel’s face grows increasingly darker, his body more tense; Sam can feel it where he’s still holding on to him.

“It doesn’t mean anything,” he spits. “If this body is wrecked, I can go to someone else, call in other favors. I don’t need you for anything.”

“Then why are you protecting me, really? If you don’t need me, then what’s the point?”

“It’s instinct,” he says, and sounds disgusted with himself for it. “Now that I’ve realized my vessel, I’m drawn to protect it. My grace doesn’t acknowledge my personal feelings on the matter.” He stares at the ground, now, voice quiet but harsh. “I tried so hard to forget being an angel, y’know? Figured it wouldn’t hurt as much leaving if I just wasn’t one of ‘em anymore. And it worked, for a while. I became the Trickster. But when I met you, all that work was lost. I was still too much Trickster to recognize you as anything of mine, but that didn’t matter, did it? You made me remember really being an angel, eventually, and now I can’t stop. You Winchesters always gotta fuck everything up, don’t you?” He laughs hollowly and looks anywhere but at Sam.

And now Gabriel is definitely looking bitter, Sam realizes. It’s the most honest he’s seen Gabriel outside of a circle of holy fire, and doesn’t that just rankle? Nobody ever seems to care about Sam for himself anymore, only for what they can get from him. In this case it’s not even superficial care, like Ruby or Lucifer, but base instinct that Gabriel seems to resent more than a little. He lets go of Gabriel.

Part 2

So We Might Live Anew, for SamGabriel MiniBang, Master Post

2012-10-23T16:40:36Z

Title:So We Might Live Anew
Author:devyn_rose
Artist:chelseawendland
Genre:slash, are faeries a genre?, canon change
Pairing (if applicable):pre-slash/slash Sam/Gabriel, very slight Anna/Jo
Rating:PG-13, for language and implied gore
Warnings:brief major character death of the SPN sort. attempted disembowelment. implied eating of human beings by non-human creatures. really nothing worse than the show can be.
Tier/Word Count:Tier 1/~10,500 words
Summary:Goes AU in the middle of 5.10, though there's vague canon monster spoilers through 6.09. It's the end of the world and, in addition to Lucifer, Sam has to worry about faeries of all things coming after him. But these faeries are a far cry from Tinkerbell, and they have a plan for both him and Gabriel. If they can get them. (I just really needed some faerie fic, ok?)
Link to art:The lovely art!
Link to fic:Part 1 on my journal.

Bela/Meg Mix for Wayward Mixes!

2012-10-21T01:32:49Z

Fandom:Supernatural
Subject:Bela/Meg
Title:Don't Let Me Break You
Warnings/Notes:Brief mentions of torture/blood. Follows canon through season 5 in the explanation, but then veers off. Bela has become a demon for the purposes of this mix, as well, though she's still got her original body ('Lauren Cohen is extremely attractive and I hate recasting' is a good enough reason for this, ok?).

Meg is a demon, snarky, twisted, and loyal to Lucifer, who she views as her god. When the plans for the Apocalypse go south, she becomes a hunted rebel instead of following Crowley, the new king of Hell. She watches out for herself above all others and was one of Alastair's students in torture.

Bela Talbot is a thief ("a GREAT thief"), in the market for items of a supernatural nature. She sold her soul when she was younger to get out of an abusive home life (which resulted in the death of her abusive parents), and has been on her own ever since. She's extremely self-reliant and resourceful; shortly before her deal came due she stole the Colt from the Winchesters and gave it to Crowley, presumably as part of some type of deal.

This is where the mix picks up (I'm firmly in the camp where Bela traded the Colt for a high position in Crowley's new order once he took over Hell). She doesn't foresee any way of getting out of Hell, so Bela decides to make her way up the ranks as quickly as possible; Meg is one of her torturers when she's on the rack, and attraction of a sort develops between them (it's fucked up, but it's demons, so). By the time we actually meet Crowley in canon, Bela is a full-fledged demon and working with him. However, once he begins his reign as king of Hell, he drops those who helped him on his way to the top, including Bela. Looking out for herself, she decides to defect and be a lone demon. Somewhere along the way she runs into Meg again, who lets her stay because there's safety and power in numbers. She even teaches Bela some of her tricks she's picked up along the way. Eventually, they start to trust each other and even fall into a sort of love.

¿Viva La Gloria? (Little Girl) - Green Day

Little girl, little girl why are you crying?
Inside your restless soul your heart is dying.
Little one, little one your soul is purging.
Of love and razor blades your blood is surging.
Run away from the river to the street,
and find yourself with your face in the gutter.
You’re a stray for the salvation army.
There is no place like home when you’ve got no place to go.

Helter Skelter (Beatles cover) - Dana Fuchs

When I get to the bottom I go back to the top of the slide
and I stop and I turn and I go for a ride.
And I get to the bottom and I see you again,
yeah yeah yeah.
Well do you, don’t you want me to make you?
I’m coming down fast but don’t let me break you.
Tell me, tell me, tell me the answer;
you may be a lover but you ain’t no dancer.
Look out, helter skelter!

Feel - Matchbox Twenty

Well, I’m a wreck, I’m a mess, I’m a spot on the pavement.
I’m a number on your wall; I make your soul tired.
And I don’t think I like this game no more.
It goes around and round and round.
I’ll tell you one more time, yeah, one more time.
...
I’m only asking because I wanna know.
How you wanna feel?

Feel It - Jakalope

Is that you doing that to me,
with your stare?
I feel the temperature start to rise and I
really take it from there.

How Strange - Emilie Autumn

I’m more than happy in my candlelight.
How strange, how strange that you
should come to my dominion
in the middle of the darkest night.
How strange, how strange that you should even try.
...
If you can tell me why I should wait around
then I may be coming down,
but until then this means
you can see me in your dreams.

D Is For Dangerous - Allison Iraheta

I can’t leave, oh,
‘cuz I’ll never make it if I’m not living on the edge.
It’s for the risk, it’s just for games,
‘cuz I never want out of this.
You’re taking me under, stolen my thunder.
And I’m all out of fight, I want you to win.
All that I ever was is burning with this lust.
Love is a weapon and it’s turning me to dust.

Hands Clean - Alanis Morissette

You’re essentially an employee
and I like you having to depend on me.
You’re a kind of protégé
and one day you’ll say you learned all you know from me.
I know you depend on me like a young thing would to a guardian.
I know you sexualize me like a young thing would and I think I like it.

If I Fell (Beatles cover) - Evan Rachel Wood

If I trust in you oh, please, don’t run and hide.
If I love you, too, oh, please don’t hurt my pride like her.
‘Cuz I couldn’t stand the pain.

Love Love Love (demo) - Of Monsters And Men

Well, maybe I’m a crook for stealing your heart away.
Yeah, maybe I’m a crook for not caring for it.
Yeah, maybe I’m a bad, bad, bad person.
Well, baby I know.

Oh, Maker - Janelle Monáe

Oh, Maker tell me did you know
this love would burn so yellow?
Becoming orange and in its time
explode from grey to black then bloody white.
La da die da die da die da die da die.
...
So much hurt on this earth.
But you loved me
and I really dared to love you too.
Perhaps what I mean to say is
that it’s amazing that your love was mine.

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Demons Beneath The Sheets: A Bobby Singer Mix

2012-09-21T05:52:55Z

Fandom: Supernatural
Subject: Bobby Singer
Title: Demons Beneath The Sheets
Warnings/Notes: Spoilers through all of season 7, especially for 7.10

How to describe Bobby? He's the town drunk. He's a cantankerous old man. He's a research genius. He's an adoptive father to Sam and Dean Winchester. He helped save the world a few times, but he wouldn't tell you that. He's a hero.

“Dad was a mean drunk. I figured I'd be just like him. And, hey, look – I was right. No sense passing on the legacy.”

Old Number Seven - The Devil Makes Three
I guess I grew up on an old dirt road,
pedal to the metal always did what I was told.
Till I found out that my brand new clothes
came second hand from the rich kids next door.
When I grew up fast, I guess I grew up mean.
There’s a thousand things inside my head I wish I ain’t seen.
And now I just wander through a real bad dream,
feeling like I’m coming apart at the seams.

Young Man In America - Anais Mitchell
My father was a lord of land, my daddy was a repo man.
Put me out onto the street, didn’t give a damn for me.
Did not give a damn.
Daddy, daddy, gonna wish you never had me, I’m a young man.
I’m growing right before your eyes, I might grow to such a size.
Blow in like a hurricane, everyone will know my name
....
Maybe I climb the stairs with a girl of golden hair.
Hold her like a sword and shield up against this lonely world.

“So how long after this...”
“...did she get possessed? Three days. Biggest regret of my life, this fight. You'd think it was when I had to stab her to death, but... no. All through that... I was thinking we never got to get past this. If I'd have known, I'd have said anything she wanted to hear.”

Steam Rising - Murder By Death
There is hell on earth, there are demons beneath the sheets.
They see through the window cracks, they slip through the floorboards.
The mortar is turning black. The foundation starts to crack.
Honey, pack your bags and go.

All Apologies - Nirvana
I wish I was like you, easily amused.
Find my nest of salt, everything is my fault.
I’ll take all the blame, Aqua Sea Foam shame.
Sunburn freezer burn, choking on the ashes of her enemy
....
In the sun. Married. Buried. Married. Buried.

Mykonos - Fleet Foxes
I remember how they took you down
as the winter turned the meadow brown.
You go wherever you go today. You go today.
When I’m walking brother don’t you forget,
it ain’t often that you’ll ever find a friend.

Hospital Beds - Cold War Kids
Tell me the story of how you ended up here.
I’ve heard it all in the hospital.
...
I’ve got one friend laying across from me.
I did not choose him, he did not choose me.
We’ve got no chance of recovery, sharing hospital
joy and misery, joy and misery, joy and misery.

I've Been Everywhere - Johnny Cash
He asked me if I’d seen a road with so much dust and sand
and I said, “Listen: I’ve traveled every road in this here land.”

“When you find God, tell him to send legs!”

Oh, Injury - Rasputina
A mistreated machine can start acting mean.
It can crack up all over the place.
Oh, injury. What a nasty wound here - let me see.
If you put metal inside of a man,
he can work much faster than you can.
With a toothpick, a penknife, a can opener.
Oh, injury.

A Dustland Fairytale - The Killers
A change came in disguise of revelation, set his soul on fire.
She says she always knew he’d come around.
And the decades disappear like sinking ships but we persevere.
God gives us hope, but we still fear what we don’t know.
Your mind is poisoned.
...
Saw Cinderella in a party dress, but she was looking for a nightgown.
I saw the devil wrapping up his hands; he’s getting ready for a showdown.
...
Out here the good girls die.

“You built a panic room?”
“I had a weekend off.”

Save Your Ass - Damion Suomi
Went out west only to find, everybody is the same.
Working jobs and getting high, trying not to go insane.
I’ve killed everything I’ve ever done, I have ever tried.
I kissed the devil and I, I spoke the name on high.
Nobody’s gonna save your ass, except for you.

"You didn't read your contract.”
“The hell you talking about, contract?”
“Paragraph 18, subsection B, which is on your naughty bits. I only have to make "best efforts" to give you back your soul.”

Black Elevator - The Builders And The Butchers
And I know a better place, it’s so much further down.
You’ll be ever mine in there with a hammer coming down.
And ever you work the earth and your hands will turn to stone.
No one here knows your name and you won’t be coming home.
You’re going down in a black elevator.
You try to drink the water, oh, the water wouldn’t save you.

“This is Bobby Singer’s direct hotline. You should not have this number.”

Ain't No Rest For The Wicked - Cage The Elephant
I know we can’t slow down, we can’t hold back,
though you know we wish we could.
Oh no, there ain’t no rest for the wicked
until we close our eyes for good.

“Bobby...you’ve helped. You got handed a small, unremarkable life, and you did something with it. Most men like you die of liver disease, watching Barney Miller reruns. You’ve done enough. Believe me.”

Oh Death - Diane Izzo
I’ll fix your feet till you can’t walk.
I’ll lock your jaw till you can’t talk.
I’ll close your eyes so you can’t see,
this very hour come and go with me.
Death, I come to take the soul,
leave the body and leave it cold.
To drop the flesh off of the frame,
the earth and worms both have claim.
Oh, Death. Oh, Death, won’t you spare me over another year?

Seven Nation Army - The White Stripes
I’m gonna fight ‘em off.
A seven nation army couldn’t hold me back.
They’re gonna rip it off,
taking their time right behind my back.
And I’m talking to myself at night
because I can’t forget.

Deadwood Mountain - Big & Rich
I’ve been a rambler all my life.
Been a bet-it-all gambler, yeah, I let it all ride.
Never been afraid of losing;
there’ve been times I’ve lost it all.
But it won’t really matter someday when I’m gone.
...
And cover me a little extra deep.
Cuz that’s the only way I’m ever gonna rest in peace.

.Zip-i-dee-doo-dah!