Catch John

Inspiration

we saw john pork's face and instantly knew his vibe was too chaotic for this dimension, so we had to trap his low-res entity in a clicker game before he could finish contacting anyone. the core idea is simple: turn the anxiety of a cursed image into a frantic, weaponized pursuit, because true joy is just clicking something really fast.

What it does

it makes you stare intensely at a cursed pig face while trying to click it with a pickaxe or llama before the timer runs out. if you win, you unlock a harder level where he's somehow even bigger and faster, proving nothing truly matters.

How we built it

we mashed together basic html, a giant canvas element, and javascript code that primarily calculates if your cursor is on john pork's face at literally any given millisecond. the 'boss' logic is just making the pig move slightly away from your mouse at ever-increasing speeds, powered by pure digital spite.

Challenges we ran into

the main challenge was preventing the game from crashing when john pork achieved critical zoom level, and figuring out how to make a single pig image require five hits to defeat without it feeling mathematically silly. we also spent three hours arguing about whether 'val gun' was a better cosmetic than 'pink gun.'

Accomplishments that we're proud of

we successfully integrated local storage to remember your preferred meme weapon, and we built a secret boss that forces players to acknowledge the full horror of a multi-hit john pork. we made a scrolling text intro for a pig chase, which is peak achievement.

What we learned

we learned that adding more zeros to a velocity variable always makes a game more fun, and that the only thing worse than a regular boss fight is a high-speed boss fight where the boss is a giant pig head. we also finally understand how css animations work, which is neat

What's next for Catch John

we're going to add a new final level where john pork is replaced by tim cheese, and we plan to implement a high score board that only accepts usernames written entirely in lowercase comic sans. our next goal is to make the entire canvas randomly rotate 45 degrees just for the lols

Built With

• css
• html
• javascript