We’ve all heard the phrase “meet students where they are.” It sounds compassionate — even enlightened. But when “where they are” is chemically addicted to cheap dopamine, maybe it’s time to stop meeting them there. After all, one of the worst ways to engage with an addict, is to enable them. The problem with this idea when used is a platitude is that we can often miss the “and then what?” If I meet my students where they are on day 1, but don’t insist on them moving forward on day 2, then I have missed the point of education.

This week in Choralosophy episode 264, I borrowed a phrase from Tristan Harris of The Social Dilemma: “the race to the bottom of the brain stem.” He used it to describe how social media companies compete to hijack our attention by tapping into our most primitive impulses.

But what if education is starting to do the same thing?

The Core Problem

Teachers are being told that if their students aren’t constantly entertained, they’re failing to “engage.”
That message — hammered in through PD sessions, administrator evals, and social media — is quickly tearing down the school’s ability to hold kids to high standards.

Instead of teaching critical thinking, focus, and perseverance, we’re chasing dopamine hits. We’re turning classrooms into TikTok feeds. And the tragic part? It’s driving great teachers out of the profession — because no human being can compete with the entertainment value of a phone.

I do NOT think anyone is doing this on purpose…

This post, and this episode are NOT saying: “Engagement in classrooms doesn’t matter” or that we shouldn’t have fun in class, and keep kids active. What I am saying is that the cycles of stimulus/reward that kids have become accustomed to on their phones do NOT map well onto the time horizons necessary for authentic engagement with meaningful learning at school. Teachers would do well to consciously avoid falling into the trap of “meeting kids where they are” in this particular way.

The Cost of “Engagement”

Let’s be honest: the dopamine economy has changed kids.
They scroll for hours getting micro-hits of reward every few seconds. Then they walk into a class that demands delayed gratification — slow practice, critical thought, maybe even boredom — and it feels like withdrawal or drug detox.

Teachers sense this. And instead of being backed up, they’re told to make it more fun.
So they gamify, gimmick, and break down their instruction into shorter and shorter stints of sustained concentration — and every time they do, they reinforce the idea that learning must feel like a scroll.

What We’re Really Teaching

• We’re teaching kids that boredom equals failure, or is a sign that this subject “isn’t for them.” Not unlike modern ideas of love and dating. (Dating apps that allow you to swipe right at the first sign of a flaw.)

• That learning should be constant stimulation. Good learning is stimulating, but sometimes the student themselves must be the source of that intrinsic stimulation.

• That “engagement” means “asking questions and appearing busy.” Which, it sometimes does! But, sometimes in looks like sitting in solitude with a book. Or practicing a repetitive task over and over until it can be done perfectly.

But boredom is not failure — it’s the precondition for focus. It’s the space where curiosity is born.
If we strip it out, we kill the muscle of attention. We rob students of the slow, meaningful dopamine that comes from mastery — from actually getting better at something hard.

Much of the “great” performers in sport, music, science, literature etc. tell similar stories of their journey. Teachers, school designers and administrators ignore this, not at their peril, but the peril of generations of future learners.

The Customer-Service Model

Too many teacher-training programs now push a “student-centered” model that’s drifted into full-on customer service.

Students and parents become clients. Teachers become servers. And if the student isn’t entertained, we get a one-star review. I have seen this change in my close to 25 year stint in public education. 20 years ago, if a student failed my class, the FIRST conversation is “what did the student not do?” Now, it is “you as the teacher had better document that you did everything right.” This is not to say that the teacher should not document this, but this shift of focus is not healthy. We should assume that the teacher is the professional in the room, and that the child may have abdicated their responsibility and start from there.

That dynamic kills rigor. It removes the student’s agency — the idea that they have responsibility for their own learning.

So What Do We Do?

• We stop apologizing for being teachers instead of entertainers.

• We rebuild schools around delayed gratification, concentration, and earned achievement.

• We set clear, high, realistic expectations — and we stop lowering them out of fear that kids will be bored.

• And if they struggle to meet those expectations, we must support teachers in giving reasonable redirections, honest grades, and clearly communicated procedures.

Because you can’t teach focus by surrendering to distraction. You can’t build self-esteem by removing the self from the equation. You can’t prepare a generation for the real world by meeting them at the bottom of their brain stem.

💬 Join the Conversation

Head to the Choralosophy Facebook page or Substack comments to weigh in:

• How do you define “engagement”?

• Is boredom a problem or a teacher’s secret weapon?

• What percentage of learning motivation should belong to the student?

Let’s talk about how to climb back up the brain stem.