Second Chance Idol :: Week Two :: High Wire Act
I wanna end all this suffering
I do believe a second chance is coming
Love is a high wire act
Got to be an acrobat
And I know you can still be that...
- Don't Look Down, BBMak
It's hard to balace Real Life with what I want to be.
Although, it would probably be easier if I had the faintest idea of what it is I want to be.
I'm constantly torn between wanting to remain an irresponsible child who makes costumes and travels anywhere I want, and wanting to finally choose a career and maybe have a baby.
I think I would be a great mom, actually. For starters, I have an awesome "mom voice." Like the throaty, angry voice of a mom who is REALLY pissed about something. I yell at other people's kids all the time! It's just practice for the future, I say.
Most importantly, I would truly enjoy things like watching cartoons with them and taking them out to the newest Disney and Pixar films. I still have a really strong grasp on what it was like for me as a child, and I think that my own associations would make it easier for me to identify with them as they grow. I was an only child, but I was so creative and intelligent that to this day all of the things that meant a lot to me back then, all of the worlds I invented or took part in, still have a special place in my heart. I feel like games of pretend with my hypothetical child would be as easy as riding a bike.
But I think I'm still too selfish. I enjoy spending time with my husband and our pets. I enjoy being able to pick up and take off to another state if we feel like it. I also really enjoy sleep. Like, a lot.
Life isn't what I expected it to be. I'm still living in the same basic area where I was born and where I grew up, but it's not the same. The restaurant where my late Uncle used to take us to breakfast is gone now, replaced with a bank. There are huge overpasses where there used to just be stoplights. There are malls and apartments where there used to be woods.
I never expected this. But I also never expected to even entertain the idea of maybe being a mom someday. I don't think we'd be the kind of parents that would change, though. I think the kid would just be another adventure, another thing added to our lives. Added, not taken away.
I think I'm getting there. Slowly but surely.
We'll find the perfect balance. Someday.
I do believe a second chance is coming
Love is a high wire act
Got to be an acrobat
And I know you can still be that...
- Don't Look Down, BBMak
It's hard to balace Real Life with what I want to be.
Although, it would probably be easier if I had the faintest idea of what it is I want to be.
I'm constantly torn between wanting to remain an irresponsible child who makes costumes and travels anywhere I want, and wanting to finally choose a career and maybe have a baby.
I think I would be a great mom, actually. For starters, I have an awesome "mom voice." Like the throaty, angry voice of a mom who is REALLY pissed about something. I yell at other people's kids all the time! It's just practice for the future, I say.
Most importantly, I would truly enjoy things like watching cartoons with them and taking them out to the newest Disney and Pixar films. I still have a really strong grasp on what it was like for me as a child, and I think that my own associations would make it easier for me to identify with them as they grow. I was an only child, but I was so creative and intelligent that to this day all of the things that meant a lot to me back then, all of the worlds I invented or took part in, still have a special place in my heart. I feel like games of pretend with my hypothetical child would be as easy as riding a bike.
But I think I'm still too selfish. I enjoy spending time with my husband and our pets. I enjoy being able to pick up and take off to another state if we feel like it. I also really enjoy sleep. Like, a lot.
Life isn't what I expected it to be. I'm still living in the same basic area where I was born and where I grew up, but it's not the same. The restaurant where my late Uncle used to take us to breakfast is gone now, replaced with a bank. There are huge overpasses where there used to just be stoplights. There are malls and apartments where there used to be woods.
I never expected this. But I also never expected to even entertain the idea of maybe being a mom someday. I don't think we'd be the kind of parents that would change, though. I think the kid would just be another adventure, another thing added to our lives. Added, not taken away.
I think I'm getting there. Slowly but surely.
We'll find the perfect balance. Someday.