Writer's Block: Book worms unite!

This is going to be so difficult because there are a slew of books that I absolutely adore and a slew that I hate. But I'll try. In no particular order:

Best:

1. Pride and Prejudice, by Jane Austen. I'm a romantic at heart, and it just doesn't get any better than this. The plot might be cliche (and definitely overused by now) but it's a classic for a reason. I'm a sucker for Austen's wit and her characters (namely Elizabeth, Darcy, Jane, and Mr. Bingley). There's also the social commentary embedded within that has such powerful feminist ideas in the midst of all that prudish Victorian-ness that it makes me want to raise my fist and scream YEAH! I just love this book and I could read it over and over again. I have.

2. Wide Sargasso Sea, by Jean Rhys. This I read for the first time in an English class I took last year; it's a sort of prequel to Charlotte Bronte's Jane Eyre. Everything about it is so beautiful, but what made me fall in love with it was the prose. You as a reader get a great inside look at a woman who is driven insane by her love for a man who does not love her back. The story is heartbreaking and tragic, and yet so incredibly lovely all at the same time. It's an easy read but it's complex; every time I pick this book up I'm instantly hooked from the first page on and I absolutely cannot put it down until I'm finished with it.

3. The Picture of Dorian Gray, by Oscar Wilde. I first read this by myself the summer after I graduated high school. I was so struck by the decadence of the novel and its, at the time, avant garde ideas on the purpose of art and the disintegration of one's soul. I became practically obsessed with it, and I actually felt stifled when I didn't have anyone to discuss the book with. So I put it away, pulling it out every now and then to read a passage. This year (my junior year in college) I signed up for a Victorian Literature class focusing on Decadent literature; this was one of the required reads. I signed up immediately. Once I read it again, I became even more obsessed with it. There is something so sinister and lovely about Dorian's descent into ugliness and crime, about how his soul is horrendous and yet he is the most beautiful man in the world on the surface; I find that the novel really speaks to readers because we all have this ugly side within us. This only novel of Wilde's seems to be a reflection of himself, as well. Too bad it was used against him in his trials. I would have loved to read more novels of his (but I've still got his great plays to read over and over again!).

*Honorable Mention: Anne Rice's The Vampire Chronicles. Sheer beauty woven into every word. I need say no more.

Worst:

1. The House of Night Series, by P.C. and Kristen Cast. I was introduced to these books by my friends, and I did not want to read them. I read them reluctantly, and it took me forever to read through them since I was so disinterested (I believe there are 5 novels released in the series so far and I had to stop reading after the 3rd). It hurts me to think that P.C. Cast is an actual creative writing teacher somewhere and that her daughter, Kristen, is an English major. Really. The novels are full of cliched characters that have absolutely no depth to them and who fall flat. The characters are stereotypical (the Mary Sue, the hick, the gay kid, the over-the-top black friend, the teacher pretending to be good but is really evil, etc. etc.) and the plots are predictable but manage to also be confusing and go absolutely nowhere. The writing is choppy and absolutely dreadful (imagine reading the word "hateful" every three words. Seriously. It's called a thesaurus! Use it wisely!), the dialogue is not funny when it is meant to be- actually, it's just eye-roll-worthy, and it's very easy to tell when there has been a switch in authors because there's no fluidity in the writing. Overall I can say that if you decide to read any of these books, you do so at your own peril, because these have GOT to be the worst books I've ever had the misfortune (and bad sense) of reading.

2. This Lullaby, by Sarah Dessen. Admittedly, it's nowhere near as horrendous as The House of Night, but it's still pretty bad. I'm beginning to think that all novels aimed at teenage girls or young women are all stereotypical and predictable. It makes me never want to touch one again (and then there's that ugly term I hate: "chick lit"). This one wasn't as boring, either, but I felt that Dessen just tried too hard. Her main character constantly reiterates how she's so cynical and such a bitch... yet she's always got boys falling all over for her. It doesn't make sense. The only vibrant character was the MC's love interest- whom she's not so interested in in the first place but ends up falling for- Dexter. He jumps off the pages. He is funny and exuberant, but that's the novel's only saving grace. And one other thing that really bothered me: all the women in the book drank nothing but diet coke or water. Seriously. Have a coke. It's not going to kill you if it's not diet! Way to perpetuate those confining ideologies that say beauty = skinny.

3. Mr. and Mrs. Fitzwilliam Darcy: A Novel: Two Shall Become One, by Sharon Lathan. I know that this book is the first of a series, but I can't remember the name of the series. In my defense, I did not spend my own money on this book- it was a gift. It's basically a published fanfiction of Austen's Pride and Prejudice. I've read other contemporary novels concerning Austen's characters so I wasn't too sad to receive this gift. Upon reading it, however... I had to stop at the third chapter because I just could not get through it. There are erotic scenes which take place which put me off- not that I have anything against erotica or anything, but it's just not the type of stuff I normally read. And it was hard for me to think of Darcy and Elizabeth as overt sexual beings. The novel takes place right after their marriage so I can see why the idea of sex would be important to the two of them, but when it came time to actually read the scene, I couldn't do it. It was so... purple. (You know, "it was a dark and stormy night...") It was actually hilarious in parts because it was just so cheesy (Elizabeth sighing Darcy's name over and over and over and saying, "William, my sweet love, don't stop" and he's whispering ridiculous things into her ear like, "We are one, my beloved. Joined together..." while they're doing the deed. I'll stop there because it's just too much. Those are actual lines from the book.) You'd think that after that you'd get to the actual story, but from what I've perused the entire novel is just about their sexual escapades together. So yeah, unless you're looking for ridiculous sexy scenes, stay away. The writing attempts to be Austen-esque and fails, because it just sounds ridiculous. And I can't take seriously an author who writes Pride and Prejudice fanfiction when she wasn't even aware of Austen or her novels or this story until after she saw the 2005 remake of P&P in theaters.

So that's me being a literature snob :)