Directed by James Bushe
A group of carpet fitters are sent on a job to an old Country house in the middle of nowhere. However they soon discover it's a trap set up by the savage, cannibalistic family, The Hannings. The carpet fitters are forced to fight for their lives or risk ending up being the evenings dinner. Unfortunately they are not quite your typical heroes!
Каннибалы и установщики напольных покрытий, 食人族和地毯工
USA Shriekfest Horror Film Festival USA 
UK18 
Germany18 Germany18 Germany UK USA 
This was made like twenty-minutes from where I live.
That’s my claim to fame.
Another cheeky British horror comedy about a group of carpenters who get sent to do a job out in the middle of nowhere. They arrive and quickly realize that they aren't there to put in new carpet. They are there to be killed and eaten by a sick twisted family of cannibals! Now it's a fight for survival. Cannibals vs Carpet fitters style. Who will win.
Had alot of fun with this one. Gory surprise kills, colorful characters, cheesy dialogue, practical effects, and even a human nipple in the pie!
Carpet Fitters Don't Cry
7 out of 10
Будто бы идеальный фильм, чтобы в нем был Саймон Пегг и Ник Фрост, но увы.
Had to rewatch so soon cause it was so peak oh my days
Well this film's a lesson to us all of the perils of venturing into the English countryside! Carpet Fitter or not. Silly, madcap and bloody 🔪😂🙄☠️
Why did they get carpet fitters if they were just going to kill them? Like 15 minutes into the movie and it's a gaping plot hole the size of your mums asshole. I'm not asking a lot from a horror comedy – besides fun kills or gore, which this also didn't have – but the least I think is necessary is that you give even a modicum of a shit about your stupid movie at the very beginning you daft twats.
Pleasantly surprised that this isn’t just one of those daft title movies that knows it’s bad so it doesn’t try… this is all the more entertaining because they’ve genuinely made a movie here. Not all the jokes land but there’s a lot of charm to the script, it even keeps you on your toes about which of these characters will live and die better than a lot of horror flicks - switching the protagonist perspective well (the comic relief essentially end up being the true leads and it’s like if Abbot and Costello were in a movie with Saw gore) . And all the gore is a lot of fun! It all feels a bit throwbacky. Even the music has…
as you can tell I only watch the best films
Much akin to 'Strippers vs Werewolves' and Cockneys vs Zombies' it's nice when the synopsis of a movie is able to be summed up in the title, it really takes out all the guess work. This time around cannibals are given centre stage and they are in the market for some new carpets. Cannibals and Carpet Fitters' is the latest madcap British horror from director James Bushe, who showcases exactly what can be achieved with a solid idea and lots of creativity.
Opening with the typical 'campers get lost' scenario, there's a good reason this technique is used countless times, you're able to introduce the villains without really showing too much and can set the tone when it comes to…
Boasting energy but not much cohesion, "Cannibals and Carpet Fitters" is a horror-comedy where neither of its modes feel organic. Telling the story the titular carpet installers who run afoul of the also titular flesh-eaters, the film is gory and uptempo. Its premise generates a familiar and potentially chilling tale, but the tonal goofiness feels at odds with the brutal kills at play. The silliness does not support the macabre and vice versa, leaving the entire affair tolerable but wanting.
„Cannibals and Carpet Fitters“ ist die Spielfilmversion des gleichnamigen Kurzfilms von Regisseur James Bushe, in der die Angestellten einer Teppichfirma in einem abgeschiedenen Landhaus auf eine degenerierte Kannibalensippe treffen. Eine blutige Low-Budget-Splatterkomödie im Stil von „Shaun of the Dead“ oder „Tucker & Dale vs. Evil“ mit grimmig-schwarz-britischem Humor und überraschend gut gemachten Gore-Effekten. Für Freunde schräger Figuren und einer kruden Story durchaus einen Blick wert.
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"Cannibals and Carpet Fitters" is the feature-length version of the short film of the same name by director James Bushe. In it, the employees of a carpet company find themselves in an isolated country house confronted with a degenerate clan of cannibals. A bloody low-budget splatter comedy in the style of "Shaun of the Dead" or "Tucker & Dale vs. Evil", featuring grim, dark British humor and surprisingly well-executed gore effects. Definitely worth a look for fans of quirky characters and an offbeat story.
Timothée Chalamet vs. roadman cannibal.
