Forgot how much I hate the style of 2000s grindhouse horror flicks. Constant quick-cut shaky-cam, gross yellow/brown/orange hues everywhere, terrible lighting, and awful characters who listen only to grunge rock (I fuck with that last part tho).

Made by the same guy who did Piranha 3DD (2012), so that kind of tells you all you need to know. The “comedy” is so hit or miss (mostly miss) that at one point I started to forget it wasn’t just horror, but then the monsters started doing it doggy style against a car and later one of them got his monster dick stuck in a door. The practical effects are super meh too, and the creatures themselves barely even get any visible…

Wow! I had forgotten just how much I love this bonkers movie. Full of great scenes and gooey practical effects, it’s one of the most underrated films of the 00’s. You will know in the first five minutes whether you’ll love it or hate it and the hilarious character introductions told me I would have nothing but love.

The creatures are disgusting and so are a lot of the characters, but in a fun way as opposed to the depressing way I watched in Raging Bull. Sorry, this movie is much more who I am than any mainstream critical darling.

Balthazar Getty and Eric Dane look quite hot in this and I really wanted to see more of both if…

Killer alien monsters that look like the love children of Ghoulies and Critters invade a local bar and it's up to the surviving patrons to work as a team to kill the monsters, but more importantly survive the night in this Project Greenlight funded monster horror Grindhouse-esque good time of a film. Totally awesome bumper sticker. Balthazar the Bozo. The wheelchair badass. Jay minus Silent Bob. The life expectancy odds shown on screen for each character as we meet them is kinda cool, totally different, and I like it a lot. Really weak ganja. Remember when Henry Rollins used to be cool? Crap the day? Dr. McSteamy without his stethoscope. Total carnage. Trucker hats kick ass. The killer monsters sure…

ENCOURAGED BY Lee

Taking inspiration from creature features such as “Critters” and “Tremors”, the story revolves around some of life's most unsavory characters who have a terrifying encounter with an alien monstrous threat while they hang on a bar at the middle of nowhere.

So this came to my attention thanks to my good ole LB buddy Lee who wrote about this earlier this week. My interest was piqued by the premise along with its influences, and in many ways it lived up to my expectations. Despite some weak jokes, there were some strong ones that had me laughing all he way through (most of them relating to the senior citizens). The creatures in question were awesomely designed and they…

Feast takes a simple concept - a bunch of characters in a dive bar come under threat from some bloodthirsty monsters. The film pulls out all the stops to try and entertain, and it's highly derivative of a number of classic creature features - all of which are much better than this! There are far too many characters introduced right off the bat. Some character bios flash up on screen as a cheap substitute for good writing. The action starts pretty quickly. A guy with a shotgun bursts into the bar warning of the threat before getting picked off himself. From there it's an onslaught with our hapless band of rogues trying to fend off the monsters, but all the…