i'm so lost i'm barely here

do me a cheesy favor???

bluerthnu — Thu, 20 Jan 2005 04:23:38 GMT

ok, i know you hate me for this, BUT.....
i will seriously send you guys a dollar if you click on the lil' faery below and just sign up for neopets. you don't have to actually do anything but sign up and make a dumb pet! it's free, no junk mail, HONEST! i just wanna get 10 people to do it (PLEEEEEASE!) so i can get some free shit. c'mon you LOVE iT !

new LAME addiction

bluerthnu — Fri, 07 Jan 2005 01:12:21 GMT

This is Poomablu, my green blumaroo friend. It's super-fun and addictive and you can torture and starve them, too!

I'm tellin' ya.. even Charity would want one of THESE bad boys: (it's a red korbat)

so anyway, that's pretty much all i've been doing for 3 days now. my niece is into it and now my brother and i are playing, too. hopefully i'll be going home sunday or monday, woop woop!!!! LATE!

(if you decide to sign-up for these, please use the link above or click Poomablu to join so i get points --- thanks)

GiVE ME MONEY !

bluerthnu — Fri, 10 Dec 2004 14:32:06 GMT

new stuff in the store, if anyone cares.....

http://www.cafepress.com/bluerthnu

bluerthnu — Sat, 20 Nov 2004 00:31:38 GMT

http://www.cafepress.com/bluerthnu

the Shopping Spree continues

bluerthnu — Sat, 16 Oct 2004 03:03:58 GMT

ok, i need to stop! bought more STUFF today. i guess it's fine - i mean, why not treat myself to some stuff, fuck it! anyway, i got....

More ART & some frames:

"Cupidon", William Adolphe Bouguereau

"Stars:Moonlight-Clair de Lune" aka "Moon", Alphonse Mucha

"Tori Amos Fairies Commemorative" aka "Tori Amos 1999", Bob Masse

An alarm clock (didn't have one)

Boring grocery type stuff, KRiSmas cards, headphones...

And some fun fun CRAFTY stuff (cuz i am retarded):
I'm gonna make a box for my jewelry so it doesn't have to live in a grocery bag anymore. So I got a lil' unfinished box with a hinge top and some wood stain and OH MY GOD, decoupage materials!
How lame am I, really? but it's cool, cuz they're faeries, right???

</a>

Whatever, I just gotta keep a few hundy for my trip to la la land in Dec., and I can't think of ANYTHING else I want... Hmmm, maybe a new digital camera. hahahahahahaha
~ K-Money

obsession

bluerthnu — Fri, 15 Oct 2004 17:57:05 GMT

some quotes from my fave movie, which you still NEED TO SEE!!!! GARDEN STATE

Sam: Hey, I recognize you.
Andrew Largeman: Ooooo, from Columbia High?
Sam: No not from high school, from T.V. Didn't you play the retarded quarterback?
Andrew Largeman: Yea.
Sam: Are You really retarded?
Andrew Largeman: No
Sam: Oooo, great job man I really thought you were retarded. I mean, you're better than that Corky kid and he's actually retarded. If there was a retarded Oscar you would win, hands down, kick his ass!
------------
Karl Benson: I thought you killed yourself.
Andrew Largeman: What?
Karl Benson: That wasn't you?
Andrew Largeman: No, no, tha-that wasn't me.
------------
Andrew Largeman: You know that point in your life when you realize that the house that you grew up in isn't really your home anymore? All of the sudden even though you have some place where you can put your stuff that idea of home is gone.
Sam: I still feel at home in my house.
Andrew Largeman: You'll see - when you move out it just sort of happens one day and it's just gone. And you can never get it back. It's like you get homesick for a place that doesn't exist. I mean it's like this right of passage, you know. You won't have this feeling again until you create a new idea of home for yourself, you know, for you kids, for the family you start, it's like a cycle or something. I miss the idea of it. Maybe that's all family really is. A group of people who miss the same imaginary place.
------------
Sam: You're in it right now.
Andrew Largeman: What?
Sam: My mom always says that, when she can see I'm like working something out in my head, she's like, 'you're in it right now' and I'm looking at you and you're definitely in it.
------------
Mrs. Lubin: Oh... guys? Don't stay in here all day. I had to take the batteries out of the carbon monoxide detector; it was beeping all night.
------------
Dr. Cohen: Mister... Andrew Largeman?
Andrew Largeman: Yes?
Dr. Cohen: There's absolutely nothing wrong with you.
Andrew Largeman: Really?
Dr. Cohen: Just kidding; how the hell would I know?
------------

PS Charity is ignoring me and I'm going to bite her.

la la la....

bluerthnu — Thu, 14 Oct 2004 14:31:29 GMT

So since the gov't gave me all kindsa free money, I went on a shopping spree for things that make me happy:

Got me some Paulina Stuckey artwork, cuz she rocks....

and i found this awesome poster at target - it's by Conny Dempsey, called "Evangeline"

and then i got one of those memory foam mattress pads.. the nice thick ones. oh those are sooo great. i have fond memories of embarrasing abby by jumping, no leaping, no FLYING onto one at the mall.. and the sales guy just looks at me like, *um, hey fatty.. you break it you buy it* :)

</a>

good times, good times. i still have over $1000 left. i'm gonna buy a plane ticket to la for christmas... oh shit, maybe i can see my chaz-titty, too! john's gonna drive me back up for real this time. (fingers crossed, everybody)

oh, and i got cable. i was watching my gross medical shows in la while i was down there and i just can't deal with the lack thereof anymore. can't wait till wednesday when they install it, woop woop!

OK, that's enough materialism for a while. bye bye butterflies!
*KRiS*

Post by TWEAK

bluerthnu — Wed, 13 Oct 2004 23:47:13 GMT

Hi everyone, it's me, Tweak. Mommy always gets to tell you how she is and what she's up to so now it's MY turn! ha!

Ok, first of all... What's up with this biatch??? She keeps leaving for days and leaving me with that fat guy. Then HE leaves and I'm all alone except for random strangers who come feed me. Now every time someone leaves, I get so SCARED they're not coming back! BASTARDS !!!!

And yo, mom, can we say STRING CHEESE OBSESSION here?!!! I mean, yeah, it's good, but you're kinda fat still... the least you could do is share. I try to play with it constantly and she yells at me. Arrrgh.

Then there's the new desk. It's got a kitty shelf, right? But she keeps putting the keyboard on it. As if the keyboard needs it's own shelf more than ME! Where is the love, ma?

Anyway, I'm pretty sure she's not going anywhere soon. I heard her talking to someone named "John" who she refers to as my "daddy" sometimes. Hmm.... I don't get it. I've got an Uncle Matt (aka the fat guy) and and Uncle Phil (who I've managed to IM all on my own, but I never see anymore)... but what makes this guy my "daddy", eh? All I know is that he's planning on coming up here soon and if he takes my spot on the bed, he's gonna get it! Oh I WILL bust out the bunny feet!!!

So, yeah.. that's what's new with ME. Me, damnit, ME! The freakin' one-eyed wonder cat. And let me just mention, Just Because YOU can't see the bugs I chase, doesn't mean they're INVISIBLE, guys! Maybe my lack of distance vision means I've got the X-RAY scope instead... ever think of that?!!!

TWEAK

poo

bluerthnu — Tue, 12 Oct 2004 20:39:15 GMT

I guess Charity wanted the world to see this, lol:

I'm doing good. The gov't mailed me a $1207 mystery check today. That beats the $309 last month. I love it when that happens. New clothes for me!!!
Matt and I are dieting and excercising, cuz our dad's death gave us mortality issues. I mean, my mom weighs like 500 and Matt was up to 395 a while ago, so now's a good time. I'm at 180 and proud, but I still have at least 25 to lose to be considered at the top of my weight range or whatever. ugh.
Anyway, I gotta go make some new LJ icons! It's been too long. *muah,
KRiS

stuff to know

bluerthnu — Sun, 10 Oct 2004 20:58:18 GMT

i am home.
my cat and i are in love today.
ATA airlines is the shit....
...United can suck my left one.
there are approximately 1800 people in Dixon, IL...
...1700 of them are Youngmarks, the rest are Reagans.
Is it wrong if you buy clothes to wear to a funeral that double as clothes you really want to go out in?
cat + miniblinds... good times

thanks you guys for the empathy and sweet comments

oh i almost forgot, i had my confrontation with my abuser. i think i'm gonna feel really good once this grief stuff passes.

bluerthnu — Fri, 08 Oct 2004 00:06:43 GMT

Well, I'm hangin' in there... Today would've been my dad's 56th birthday. So happy bday to him. I'm leaving with my 2 bros at 620 in the morning for the funeral. My stepmom is paying to get me back home so I don't have to fly back to LA then try to figure it out to get home. I'm actually more scared of having to deal with all the sympathy from "strangers" (aka family i don't know) than of just the sadness of the funeral. and scott will be there... my mom's oldest son that ruined me as a child. i'm planning on just trying to ignore him and not let it turn into a day about him instead of my pop. it wouldn't be right for me to waste all the energy on him or out him as a fucking child molester at my dad's funeral, but i know i'll want to.
anyway, this needs to be the end of my sad entries i think. everyone knows little kristen is a hyper rainbow-licious faerie freaky dork, not this sad ass person.. (lol, except all the people who prescribe me pills and hide the knives,.. and the fact that we all know i'm major depressive) whatever. denial is part of the grieving process, right? i'm all about that, lol.
i'm gonna be in a good mood when i get back to washington.
um, yeah.

ps. the john molestation project did not take place and kris got NO lovin' in california... *sigh. it's soooo wrong ;p

RIP

bluerthnu — Tue, 05 Oct 2004 01:27:20 GMT

for my father,

Donn Edward Youngmark
10-07-1948 - 10-04-2004
may you Rest In Peace

i'll always love you dad

SCREAMING !!!!!!!!!!

bluerthnu — Fri, 01 Oct 2004 21:52:06 GMT

ugh.. whine... i wanna go home! yeah, i'm calling tacoma home. i guess it is now. tomorrow i'm supposed to go with jazz & abby and their friend to some cancer walk.. not sure how depressed i can be. this might be a BAD idea.
right before i left i found out my dad was in kidney failure, right... so they started dialysis... said there's no hope he'll be able to go off it. which means no chemo anymore. and now they can't get him fed because of his stomach ulcer problem.. so he's not getting proper nutrition and just wasting away... and apparently now he's got pneumonia. fuck! he was just fucking diagnosed 2 months ago!!! rrrrrrgh... screaming so i don't cry anymore!!!!
um, let's see... camarillo sucks. i wanna go home. oh i said that hahhaha. i'm praying john is gonna take me home next weekend. ex-stepmom faye wants mike and i to fly to florida to see my dad.. maybe i should just ask her to fly me directly home from there? i don't even know if we're going or not. mike doesn't want to. i feel like i ought to.. wouldn't want to regret not seeing him before he died... but i don't want to go alone... and yet, i'm so fucking sick of mike. i just need to be alone. he's been cool as hell, but i just need to have some time to myself. shit, i've been hanging out with him everyday since he came to WA almost 2 weeks ago. i'm such a bitch.

AVRIL LAVIGNE wants you...... DEAD !

bluerthnu — Mon, 27 Sep 2004 05:31:23 GMT

OMG laughing my fucking ass off....
so my bro mike spent like 3 days building us an awesome PC and then dumbass Matt goes and downloads a virus - and fucking AVRIL LAVIGNE pops up onto the screen and KiLLS our internet access!!!!
apparently there was a popular email virus a few months ago that MADE you go to her website, but this wasn't it... this killed the whole goddamn internet and other parts of the harddrive.
so yeah, it's 530 am and it just got fixed. thank go d the computer was brand new and we had all the back up shit and didn't have too much stuff to replace.
anyway, just know that she wants you dead. if for some reason you get email from me with any funky attachments, don't download that shit. i don't think you will, but just in case.

In other news, i am officially twelve years old cuz i was bored and made this :

</a>

*BUZZZZZZ nevermind... DeNieD!!! i changed it cuz it was scary :)*

More movie madness

bluerthnu — Sat, 25 Sep 2004 20:36:24 GMT

Oh, I forgot to mention BUBBA HO-TEP. It's a fabulous movie. For those of you that like quirky, silly "Army of Darkness" type stuff, you DEFINITELY need to see this.
It's about an old man in a rest home who may or may not be Elvis... and his friend Jack, who may or may not be a dyed-black JFK. are you already cracking up??? it gets better... They have to fight off a cowboy boot-wearin' mummy who is sucking the souls of the elderly out of their arseholes. OH YES, my friends.. this movie is the shit !!!!

So if you've been paying attention, the movies you should be renting/seeing in the theatre asap are:

Garden State
Bubba Ho-Tep &
Monster

That is all.

sadness

bluerthnu — Sat, 25 Sep 2004 17:58:35 GMT

So this might be it for my dad. He's been on chemo and radiation for a month or so now and the tumor hasn't shrunk. He decided to get an apartment in Dixon, IL.. near my grandparents. His brother Robert took him down to Florida to pick up his stuff from his ex-wife, Faye's house and on the way back I guess he passed out or something. Uncle Robert took him to the hospital somewhere near Tampa. It turns out he had an ulcer (he's always got ulcers) and the chemo affected it badly and it burst or something. Now he's in a coma.
My bro Dave and his wife are flying out there tonight. They barely found a flight cuz of the weather down there. They're going to call us tomorrow morning and let us know what's up. Mike and I were supposed to leave for CA tomorrow, but we're gonna wait and see what's going on with him. I might be cancelling my trip... although I don't know if I'd be able to get to either Florida or Illinois, where I assume I'll probably be going to a funeral.
Oy. I dunno. I feel kinda numb, ya know? I've never had anyone in my family die.. and only a few friends. This is weird. I feel like there's a million things I need to ask him and talk to him about. He always wanted me to sing for him.. make him a cd or something. I was planning on doing it for his birthday in 3 weeks. Now he may not even turn 56.
Anyway, yeah, depressing. Here's some old pics if you're interested.

And at least Charity cheered me up without knowing it with her post. You know I had to do it....

Love by ruby mae
Your name
Your partner
You two are	One
Your meeting was by	Destiny
They are your	Protector
You are their	True love
Your love will	Last for all eternity

Quiz created with MemeGen!

coming home ?

bluerthnu — Fri, 24 Sep 2004 17:23:45 GMT

so i THINK i'm coming down to camarillo on Monday. it kinda depends on john and whether he'll commit to driving me back up in a week or two. of course i don't know yet, it's still 2 days away and we all know Kris can't plan for shit. anyway, i am planning on annoying jazz and abby as much as possible and trying to get to the 909 to see my friend Kimberly and Phil, too.

it's been cool having my brother mike here this week. yeah, he annoys me sometimes, but we went to the zoo, which i've been wanting to do and it RULED! they have an aquarium there, too... saw a fucking walrus that was BiGGeR than the baluga whale in the tank next to it!!! they have a seahorse exhibit going on now.. those these are CREEPY!!! i spent like 10 minutes just staring into the eyes of an elephant. i think he liked me cuz he kept coming closer to me and ignoring all the children. anyway, i saw a lot of neat stuff and it made me happy :)

mike also built us a new computer. it's nice having a PC again. i like the mac, but this is still easier for me. and he got us stuff to pirate dvds.. not that i do that, lol.. but now i can. oh, and he modified matt's x-box so he can pirate video games. mike sure is handy. anyone know of a job for him in ventura county??

well, that's what's been up. if i make it to camarillo, i'll call you jazz.. and if not, i suppose you will see me here.

I <3 Garden State

bluerthnu — Sun, 19 Sep 2004 19:54:01 GMT

ok, i just wanted to say that everyone should go see GARDEN STATE immediately. i really really really loved this movie. it's not all about love and shit like the commercials make it seem. it's more about just being surprised by little shit life throws you. the main character is me, i swear. (and not just cuz he was on a million useless head pills - most of which i was on, too) i dunno.. i can't even describe it. it's just awesome. go see it !!!!!

hehe

bluerthnu — Thu, 16 Sep 2004 15:43:08 GMT

Boredom + Digital Camera + Photoshop =

Scary 80's Pictures!!!

*Somebody STOP me*

nothing really

bluerthnu — Thu, 16 Sep 2004 04:02:57 GMT

I've been having way too much fun makin' stupid shit on the computer - dumb icons and photo manipulation fun. Whatever. At least I have a hobby I guess...

I randomly decided I needed to re-open all the holes in my ears and afterwards, just for giggles, I tried to stick an earring through my old eyebrow piercing and IT WORKED! I hadn't worn jewelry in it for months, so right on.

My brother Mike is coming up from Camarillo tomorrow. He's bringing a shitload of my stuff I left there with him... clothes, books, diabetic supplies, etc. I guess he's sick of hanging out at my mom's and so he's gonna look for work up here. His brilliant plan is that we switch places and I go back. Ugh. I mean, I miss everyone, but I REALLY don't want to live with my mom again!!!!

My friend Jolie is also trying to get me back to CA. She's moving to San Diego, cuz her new hubbie is in the Navy. She thinks I oughtta move there with her husband in November (which is just weird cuz she won't be there until January - plus, I have a BAD habit of *accidentally* getting involved with her ex boyfriends, lol) But she also said I should at least come stay with them for a while while he's shipped out for 4 months next spring. Yeah.. we'll see.

I've been cleaning my ass off for no reason lately. Since we moved in I've been actually doing the dishes, sweeping, making my bed, etc, etc - all NEW for me! I guess since Mike is anal retentive, I'm thinking it's a good idea to make the place crazy spotless for his arrival. Shit, I have the time.

Hmm... this is all seeming very random. Think I'll go to bed now.

holy shit HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!

bluerthnu — Thu, 09 Sep 2004 12:59:27 GMT

I am SOOO retarded! I can't wait until Charity sees the horrible things I have done to her HEAD!

bluerthnu — Thu, 09 Sep 2004 03:55:25 GMT

-21 lbs. i need some new clothes!

bluerthnu — Tue, 07 Sep 2004 15:46:15 GMT

in the past few days i've managed to get 249 new songs downloaded on my itunes... ohmygod i need a life! yeah, last week it was GIFs and deviantart.com (but then i remembered i suck) ... wonder what obsessive compulsive interest i'll take up next week???

good news: the official weight loss total is now 20 pounds. YaY! I'm still not gonna wear a pink halter top, but it's a damn good start. :)

JazziePoon... How can you say you "HATE TREES!!!!" . tsk, tsk. the trees are my friends. (someone has to be) that's why i love washington so... just look at my happy apartment backyard *no photography skills, but pretty none.the.less*

well, i have nothing to say really... just thought i'd make a lil' noise today.

*muah,

nothing

bluerthnu — Wed, 01 Sep 2004 10:17:57 GMT

i've had a busy couple of days... my mission was to find a way to make those animated icons and i finally did last night, YaY!

you can look at my mighty spectacular work at worthless crap i still haven't put up any REAL art, but i'm working on it. all that's there now is my icon and a button i made that links to my shitty yahoo website. (i was really really bored)

good times....

kris

bluerthnu — Sat, 28 Aug 2004 03:21:32 GMT

You love me Charity.... and the cat !

I've been feeling creative lately. I realized that Matt has all kinds of stuff on his 'puter for me to play with.. Photoshop, Illustrator, etc., so I've been playing around with it. Not that the cat is a great example of my work, lol... Hey, I just erased an eye and fucked with the word bubble!

But I did join deviantART.com . Nothing posted yet... maybe soon. I'll probably just post doodles.. maybe some photos and stories or whatever. I just need to be doing stuff other than sleeping all day!

So far all I've made for the site is my little icon. I'm planning on learning how to make it animated. *Abby, Jazz... Wanna Help?*

(And no I'm not having an identity crisis... that's Mo from Save Ferris.)

Anyway, the name there is bluerthnu, too.

And here's the stupid cat comment I actually got:


	A suprise treat awaits you. ...Suprise! it IS herpes after all

Billy's Weird...cat...thing tells your fortune!