Brother Beldar's Digital Devival

Hello

beldar — Wed, 02 Feb 2022 20:21:55 GMT

Since I'm checking in on Groundhog Day, you don't know how many times I've already written this.

Survived 2020 =)

beldar — Wed, 13 Jan 2021 19:29:41 GMT

Just rummaging around here. Don't mind me — carry on.

Not very 'civil'

beldar — Mon, 01 Jun 2020 13:28:48 GMT

Finding it mildly amusing, the "Boogaloo" used as code for white-power insurrection apparently being a web-fueled riff, "Civil War 2: Electric Boogaloo," based on the movie title "Breakin' 2: Electric Boogaloo" — so yeah, the irony of white supremacists getting the name of their movement from a film about Urban (mainly black) culture.

Putting that aside, it's interesting that even left-leaning comments are taking seriously the notion of a new Civil War. Which isn't going to happen, at least in the near future, and not with the people trying to foment it now. The original war had its roots in regional alliances that set up from Colonial ties (no doubt the Crown liked it that way, keeping us mad at each other rather than the King). Further, each southern state had its own organization from the capitol on down to local sheriffs, complete with fully trained and supplied militias. Today's "militias" have nowhere near that level of organization or support, and are too individually paranoid to gel under central leadership.

The original Civil War took decades to finally break out; it's unnatural to put people who were erstwhile friends and family at each others' throats on that scale. Of course, Slavery was the huge factor and tipping point. When it seemed inevitable that Northern industrial interests, backed up by the moral/ethical high ground, were going to abolish, the Southern planters, being informed the equivalent of today telling farmers in the Midwest that their farm equipment no longer belongs to them and can leave the land with no recourse, roused the militias to action, and enforced the (fairly popular) notion that the "United States" is a plural noun, not singular, and a State is and can be totally on its own away from the others, joining with a Confederacy of like-minded if it sees fit.

No. What we see here is an active case of the delusion of "Race War," which wasn't even possible back in the 1960s when a lot of people thought it was inevitable. The idea that once fighting broke out, everyone in the U.S. would automatically form lines based on their skin-tone and fight each other to the death, or to eventual parallel utopias of race-based ethno-states (see the recent novel, "Adjustment Day"), was so far-out wacky, one of its biggest proponents was Charles Manson.

Sad to say for the Proud Boys, Kluxxers, and whoever else ascribes to this, but the nightmare their Jim Crow grandpas warned of has come true. "Race-mixing" has been completely accepted and normalized in America, especially among the younger generations.

Old ways die hard, especially if one's personal identity and means of attaining power are highly invested in them. Boogaloo will swiftly become as much of a relic as an '80s breakdancing movie, but with with worse music. In the meantime, we need to see the dangerous fools for what they are, and deal with their (call it what it is) terrorist threats.

Living in interesting times

beldar — Mon, 20 Apr 2020 17:24:46 GMT

Perhaps this year I'll do more writing here, being 2020 and all.

I'm guessing that just saying this year by number ("2020") will be shorthand for the Year of the Coronavirus Covid-19 Global Pandemic, when people everywhere (even the bored Russians possibly monitoring this) called everything off and stayed at home.

(Wave if you can see me, Comrades! And if you answer, note I don't speak the language or read Cyrillic, thanks)

And, while my day-job has found a way to keep me employed, I am spending some time writing from the dining-room table.

I'm Livin' la Lemur Loca =)

How you doin'?

Checking in

beldar — Sun, 07 Apr 2019 22:17:26 GMT

Tuesday was the anniversary of that long-ago day I started this LJ, calling it a “Live Periodical” as “Journal” insinuated being written daily, and there was no way I was going to keep that up.

Now it’s *very* periodical. Like hardly at all.

I haven’t given up on this site yet. There’s stuff I want to save or glean from here to polish up and publish, especially from the “fixon” account. And I do think sometimes of things that I’d like to write here, things that need a little room to breathe like this format allows.

What have I been up to?

Social media wise, my main activity has been on Facebook.

Workwise: I was let go from the newspaper job at the beginning of 2015 (positions consolidated, leaving me nothing; I left on good terms with a small severance). Then came nearly two years at Indy’s LGBTQ+ paper, which has since folded. Now I work for a company that contracts to run the copy/print/mail/document scanning office at a major downtown law firm. Having that as my “day job” leaves me free to keep up my reporting activities with a local theatre review blog, which turns four years old this summer.

Also, I’ve stayed active with the local SF/F convention, and am the chairperson this year.

And I am now approaching Level 39 in Pokemon Go (team Instinct).

The biggest news on what’s become of me is that I’ve grown out my beard and worked as a Santa Claus for the last couple of years. I’ve even gone to my old hometown church to greet the kids at their Christmas Eve program.

Will I be posting more here? If so, how often? I have no idea. Life has a way of revising even the simplest of plans. I don’t think I’m done, though.

We’ll see.

Let it shine

beldar — Thu, 20 Apr 2017 15:00:50 GMT

My Paid membership to LJ expired right as I'm hit with financial issues, so I have lost the bells and whistles (and most of my icons) including making polls.

So, after several years, I'm suspending the monthly "Candle Poll"

There were a few of you still answering it, and I'll still remember you. I'll screen comments if any have requests.

I'm the one who has felt most blessed, keeping up this little exercise in faith. Thank you for participating!

I'll light one in every color this Sunday.

Making it easier

beldar — Tue, 28 Mar 2017 16:01:38 GMT

It's not that easy being green; Having to spend each day the color of the leaves.
When I think it could be nicer being red, or yellow or gold - or something much more colorful like that.
It's not easy being green. It seems you blend in with so many other ordinary things.
And people tend to pass you over 'cause you're not standing out like flashy sparkles in the water-
or stars in the sky.
But green's the color of Spring. And green can be cool and friendly-like.
And green can be big like the ocean, or important like a mountain, or tall like a tree.
When green is all there is to be, It could make you wonder why, but why wonder?
Why Wonder?
I am green and it'll do fine, it's beautiful!
And I think it's what I want to be.

Inspired by the candle stands at LifeJourney Church, Indianapolis, I again present my monthly poll. As usual, I'll be bringing the list to church Sunday (as I keep noting, this isn't just a Christian thing, candles for prayer or meditation are used in practically all faiths). Newcomers can look down the "prayer candles" tag to see the origin of this.

View Poll: March 2017 Candlepoll

The candles at my church are in various-colored votive holders -- red, green, blue and yellow, with a few orange and purple. If you have a color preference, you can note it, as well as any other details (optional) in comments (comments screened and not unscreened without explicit permission).

The one they're going to miss

beldar — Fri, 17 Mar 2017 19:32:09 GMT

In the song, "Our House" by the band Madness (a big hit in the 80s which still pops up sometimes), we see the busy family members on a nice day, a sweet memory of "our house, in the middle of our street" and with the upbeat tune it's all fun, until, just before the bridge, we get the line regarding the mother: "She's the one they're going to miss, in lots of ways."

Perhaps it's just me, but that line always hit me hard, like something was going to go terribly wrong -- what's going to happen to Mother? Suddenly, the reprise of the first verse towards the last chorus takes on a darker, foreboding tone.

I had this in mind when I wrote my entry for LJ Idol: Second Chance Idol, "Peas in a Pod," which is now up for voting in a poll through Sunday. I wrote a pastorale of a pleasant memory, a sweet look at a busy but happy family. But then I close with the ambiguous last paragraph. Did I mean something by that? Or does the dark sides of our minds just read too much into things?

I'll leave that for you to figure out.

Very very

beldar — Wed, 22 Feb 2017 14:28:26 GMT

...I find it kinda funny, I find it kinda sad
The dreams in which I'm dying are the best I've ever had
I find it hard to tell you, I find it hard to take
When people run in circles it's a very very
mad world...

Inspired by the candle stands at LifeJourney Church, Indianapolis, I again present my monthly poll. As usual, I'll be bringing the list to church Sunday (as I keep noting, this isn't just a Christian thing, candles for prayer or meditation are used in practically all faiths). Newcomers can look down the "prayer candles" tag to see the origin of this.

View Poll: February 2017 Candlepoll

Feel fine?

beldar — Fri, 27 Jan 2017 17:21:07 GMT

Six o'clock, T.V. hour, don't get caught in foreign tower
Slash and burn, return, listen to yourself churn
Lock him in uniform, book burning, bloodletting
Every motive escalate, automotive incinerate
Light a candle, light a motive, step down, step down
Watch your heel crush, crush, uh oh
This means no fear, cavalier, renegade and steering clear
A tournament, a tournament, a tournament of lies
Offer me solutions, offer me alternatives and I decline

Inspired by the candle stands at LifeJourney Church, Indianapolis, I again present my monthly poll. As usual, I'll be bringing the list to church Sunday (as I keep noting, this isn't just a Christian thing, candles for prayer or meditation are used in practically all faiths). Newcomers can look down the "prayer candles" tag to see the origin of this.

View Poll: January 2017 Candlepoll

Happy Holidays (?)

beldar — Tue, 27 Dec 2016 20:38:24 GMT

Here we are between Christmas and New Years, during Hanukkah and Kwanzaa, but what's on most minds today is wondering if we can make it to the end of 2016 without hearing of yet another notable person passing away, or more bad news -- locally, nationally or globally -- being transmitted to our brains. If we reflect a little, we'll realize it wasn't *all* bad - was it?

Inspired by the candle stands at LifeJourney Church, Indianapolis, I again present my monthly poll. As usual, I'll be bringing the list to church Sunday (as I keep noting, this isn't just a Christian thing, candles for prayer or meditation are used in practically all faiths). Newcomers can look down the "prayer candles" tag to see the origin of this.

View Poll: December 2016 Candlepoll

Thank you

beldar — Mon, 21 Nov 2016 22:20:59 GMT

Several times over the years that I have been doing this monthly poll, I have heard from someone saying, "Thank you for doing this." This Thanksgiving month and week (on the U.S. calendar) I thank you all for taking part. The promise still stands; as long as you respond, I'll keep doing this.

Inspired by the candle stands at LifeJourney Church, Indianapolis, I again present my monthly poll. As usual, I'll be bringing the list to church Sunday (as I keep noting, this isn't just a Christian thing, candles for prayer or meditation are used in practically all faiths). Newcomers can look down the "prayer candles" tag to see the origin of this.

View Poll: November 2016 Candlepoll

Old October

beldar — Thu, 20 Oct 2016 17:45:09 GMT

Old October's purt' nigh gone, And the frosts is comin' on Little heavier every day -- Like our hearts is thataway!
Leaves is changin' overhead Back from green to gray and red, Brown and yeller, with their stems Loosenin' on the oaks and e'ms;
And the balance of the trees Gittin' balder every breeze -- Like the heads we're scratchin' on! Old October's purt' nigh gone.
I love Old October so, I can't bear to see her go -- Seems to me like losin' some Old-home relative er chum --
'Pears like sorto' settin' by Some old friend 'at sigh by sigh Was a-passin' out o' sight Into everlastin' night!
Hickernuts a feller hears Rattlin' down is more like tears Drappin' on the leaves below -- I love Old October so!
Can't tell what it is about Old October knock me out! I sleep well enough at night -- And the blamedest appetite
Ever mortal man possessed, Last thing et, it tastes the best! Warnuts, butternuts, pawpaws, 'Iles and limbers up my jaws
Fer raal service, sich as new Pork, spareribs, and sausage, too -- Yit fer all, they's somepin' 'bout Old October knocks me out!
-- James Whitcomb Riley (late 19th-century American poet, born in October)

Inspired by the candle stands at LifeJourney Church, Indianapolis, I again present my monthly poll. As usual, I'll be bringing the list to church Sunday (as I keep noting, this isn't just a Christian thing, candles for prayer or meditation are used in practically all faiths). Newcomers can look down the "prayer candles" tag to see the origin of this.

View Poll: October 2016 Candlepoll

Headed for a Fall

beldar — Tue, 20 Sep 2016 19:47:41 GMT

As we arrive at the dawning of autumn, has your September been like that funky song by Earth Wind and Fire, or more like Green Day's "Wake Me Up When September Ends"? Maybe some tune in between?

Inspired by the candle stands at LifeJourney Church, Indianapolis, I again present my monthly poll. As usual, I'll be bringing the list to church Sunday (as I keep noting, this isn't just a Christian thing, candles for prayer or meditation are used in practically all faiths). Newcomers can look down the "prayer candles" tag to see the origin of this.

View Poll: September 2016 Candlepoll

Doggone days

beldar — Thu, 25 Aug 2016 14:18:03 GMT

Summer has flown by, at least it seems to me. It's not going quietly, judging by the floods in Louisiana and the tornadoes almost literally in my Indiana back yard. Still, there are things to celebrate on the sunny days. For whatever reason let's light this up:

Inspired by the candle stands at LifeJourney Church, Indianapolis, I again present my monthly poll. As usual, I'll be bringing the list to church Sunday (as I keep noting, this isn't just a Christian thing, candles for prayer or meditation are used in practically all faiths). Newcomers can look down the "prayer candles" tag to see the origin of this.

View Poll: August 2016 Candlepoll

Restoring the light

beldar — Mon, 11 Jul 2016 18:18:33 GMT

My sincere apologies. For the first time in the years I've been posting these, I totally missed a month. And June was definitely a month for lighting candles -- especially in all the vigils for the 49 murdered in the Orlando Pulse club attack. This is ironically part of what contributed to me overlooking the poll posting. I work for The Word, the Indianapolis-based LGBTQ-focused newspaper, and for two weeks, while completing the edition as a whole, I also spent a lot of time with these victims, sizing and positioning their photos, learning and briefly writing their bios. Most of these were in their 20s, two were teens. You can't look at this many lives snuffed out without it affecting you.

This last week, there were more killed in shootings by and at police. We have much to pray for (then, we get off our knees and act, right?).

These weeks have also had warm summer days and reasons to celebrate. We are complex creatures, and have a right to our joy; there's too little of it other days.

Inspired by the candle stands at LifeJourney Church, Indianapolis, I again present my monthly poll. As usual, I'll be bringing the list to church Sunday (as I keep noting, this isn't just a Christian thing, candles for prayer or meditation are used in practically all faiths). Newcomers can look down the "prayer candles" tag to see the origin of this.

View Poll: June/July 2016 Candlepoll

Summer? Some are

beldar — Mon, 20 Jun 2016 13:54:38 GMT

See? I don't just post the polls here =p

Quick note to say Happy Solstice to all who celebrate it -- and to the rest, summer's officially here! (OK, winter if you're south of the Earth's waistline)

20 years ago, this happened

Time does fly, on the wings of summer's birds. Don't forget to enjoy their song

Ignition

beldar — Wed, 25 May 2016 15:08:55 GMT

It's May in Indy, and this weekend will be the 100th call of "(Ladies and) Gentlemen, start your engines!" We all have our races to run, at least in the metaphorical sense. Here's a chance to give your engine a tune-up.

Inspired by the candle stands at LifeJourney Church, Indianapolis, I again present my monthly poll. As usual, I'll be bringing the list to church Sunday (as I keep noting, this isn't just a Christian thing, candles for prayer or meditation are used in practically all faiths). Newcomers can look down the "prayer candles" tag to see the origin of this.

View Poll: May 2016 Candlepoll

Time, time, time -- look what's become of me...

beldar — Thu, 21 Apr 2016 15:14:29 GMT

Ah, so I get this in a little more timely this month. And I'm working this in among other deadlines being demanded of me. But then the Good Book says that to everything there is a time and a season. So how about now?

Inspired by the candle stands at LifeJourney Church, Indianapolis, I again present my monthly poll. As usual, I'll be bringing the list to church Sunday (as I keep noting, this isn't just a Christian thing, candles for prayer or meditation are used in practically all faiths). Newcomers can look down the "prayer candles" tag to see the origin of this.

View Poll: April 2016 Candlepoll

Out like a lion

beldar — Thu, 31 Mar 2016 15:52:32 GMT

As storms rumble around the area, I'm reminded that back home in Arkansas, another word for "tornado watch" was "April." And here in Indiana it is, if not Tornado Alley, then at least Severe Storm Cul-de-sac. But with storms literal and metaphorical around us, we also welcome the beauty of the coming of Spring.

And it's still March, so this isn't technically late.

Inspired by the candle stands at LifeJourney Church, Indianapolis, I again present my monthly poll. As usual, I'll be bringing the list to church Sunday (as I keep noting, this isn't just a Christian thing, candles for prayer or meditation are used in practically all faiths). Newcomers can look down the "prayer candles" tag to see the origin of this.

View Poll: March 2016 Candlepoll

The envelope please...

beldar — Wed, 24 Feb 2016 19:36:37 GMT

It's "awards season" for celebrities. What did you get? Who do you thank? Or maybe it's better to just seek out the afterparty.

Inspired by the candle stands at LifeJourney Church, Indianapolis, I again present my monthly poll. As usual, I'll be bringing the list to church Sunday (as I keep noting, this isn't just a Christian thing, candles for prayer or meditation are used in practically all faiths). Newcomers can look down the "prayer candles" tag to see the origin of this.

View Poll: February 2016 Candlepoll

The light returns

beldar — Mon, 01 Feb 2016 16:17:12 GMT

Apologies for my lateness. Yesterday, I lit candles for you. Next time I'm at church, I'll light them again.

Inspired by the candle stands at LifeJourney Church, Indianapolis, I again present my monthly poll. As usual, I'll be bringing the list to church Sunday (as I keep noting, this isn't just a Christian thing, candles for prayer or meditation are used in practically all faiths). Newcomers can look down the "prayer candles" tag to see the origin of this.

View Poll: January 2016 Candlepoll

Fin de siecle

beldar — Thu, 31 Dec 2015 15:14:45 GMT

End of the year. Time to look ahead, look behind, look beyond, look within.

Inspired by the candle stands at LifeJourney Church, Indianapolis, I again present my monthly poll. As usual, I'll be bringing the list to church Sunday (as I keep noting, this isn't just a Christian thing, candles for prayer or meditation are used in practically all faiths). Newcomers can look down the "prayer candles" tag to see the origin of this.

View Poll: December 2015 Candlepoll

Thank you

beldar — Tue, 24 Nov 2015 18:31:16 GMT

Thank you to the couple who thought I'd be the guy to redesign and restart their newspaper. Thank you to my former employer for letting me down easy. Thank you to veronica_rich for helping me stay in the game. Thank you to friends, family and strangers who helped us during our automotive crises (plural). Thank you to relatives who came up to spend a few days with us in July. Thank you to nieces and nephews for surprise phone calls and texts. Thank you to online and offline friends for being part of my life. Thank you to the_dark_snack for everything.

Inspired by the candle stands at LifeJourney Church, Indianapolis, I again present my monthly poll. As usual, I'll be bringing the list to church Sunday (as I keep noting, this isn't just a Christian thing, candles for prayer or meditation are used in practically all faiths). Newcomers can look down the "prayer candles" tag to see the origin of this.

View Poll: November 2015 Candlepoll

Spooky times

beldar — Thu, 29 Oct 2015 17:07:36 GMT

As Samhain, All Saints Day, etc. approach, we have much to meditate on as the seasons shift.

Inspired by the candle stands at LifeJourney Church, Indianapolis, I again present my monthly poll. As usual, I'll be bringing the list to church Sunday (as I keep noting, this isn't just a Christian thing, candles for prayer or meditation are used in practically all faiths). Newcomers can look down the "prayer candles" tag to see the origin of this.

View Poll: October 2015 Candlepoll