Me: Ugh. What the hell is up with this headache?! I need it to go away now!

Irma *turns to her sister*: Nat, it’s time for you to leave home.

While getting ready to sacrifice my life by doing groceries:

Me: Is there something that we absolutely need that I should not forget?

Irma: Love.

Me: Ukinnam.

Irma: Mum, is debit made for people who can’t pronounce debt?

Me: Matulog ka na.

Irma: I think we should stop eating.

Me: Right? I think I’m getting fat.

Irma: Me, too!

Me: Maybe we don’t eat heavy dinner tonight? Or we quit merienda?

Irma: I didn’t say we do it today.

And the three little pigs lived happily ever after.

Dahil dito, my panganay will never taste her mum’s baked spaghetti ever again.

Like ever.

While looking around at the bookstore

Me: Let’s go to the other side. Where’s your sister?

*Irma whistles na parang calling for a dog*

Taling *running to us*: Did you just…?

Irma: Well, it got you here, didn’t it?

Irma: Mummy can I eat the last cookie?

Taling: It’s can WE eat. The fridge is ruled by communism, Andrea.

Irma: I dunno, I’m feeling extra right wing today.

Eh kung kunin ko na lang kaya because monarchy and my queendom?

Me: What do we call our YouTube channel?

Irma: The devil and spawns?

Me: Don’t hold back child. Irma: What was that again, the pig’s nest?

Me: Pigsty?

Irma: No, the one where the maid is the only one that’s thin.

Me: Oh Pugad Baboy. Punyeta. Nest? Really?

Irma: Translated right.

Anyway, please subscribe here: Our Youtube Channel: The Devil Wears (her) Spawns

Taling: Why do you eat banana like that?

Irma: I didn’t know I bite it from the left!

Taling: So weird. *starts checking out the other bananas*

Irma: Stop caressing the bananas, Nat.

Me: Yeah, it won’t grow bigger. Swear.

Irma: Take it from her. She probably tried.

For her IA in Bio, Irma is checking how different the effects of soda and stomach acid on teeth. So eto sya ngayon, plucking teeth out of a pig for her experiments.

Lab Asst: Are you sure you want to do it yourself?

Irma: Yes.

Lab Asst: It’s hard. I can do it. Your mum…

At home:

Irma: You’re the inspiration for this experiment, mummy.

Me: Are you calling me a pig?

Irma: Noooo! I want you to see how damaging drinking Coke is to your teeth! Maybe you’d stop! But pig works, too.

Buhay pa sya, gais.