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Subject:	If I were the king of the world...
Time:	24 Jan 2005\|08:19pm
Mood:	calm.

I'd tell you what I'd do. I'd throw away the bars and the cars and the war,
and make sweet love to you.

We're (me, Pirate-X and the Ringo formerly known as Kat) gonna do that for the next Open Mic. I'm working on it on my guitar. My fingers hurt. We are called A Whorse Named Man, and I want to make the logo. I may have to do that.

Failed math Exam. Dad's gonna kill me when he gets home and gets my report card. I'll have to kill myself. I swear to god. Or do it again. At least you can't tell. If I don't update anytime soon, that's probably why. Because I'll have been kicked off. Anything to be able to go to LPH.
Didn't get into Guys & Dolls.
Wondering why people can post such horrible things they've done to themselves and how much they feel like dying and get lots of comments and everyone loves them, and when others do it, no one says anything.
Or why no one comments in my journal that much, in general.
Think about it.

2 dreams

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Subject:	Read this, but read the other entry too.
Time:	20 Jan 2005\|10:10pm
Mood:	sick.

4 dreams

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Time:

20 Jan 2005|06:26pm

I did it again. Three times this week, two nights in a row, 6 times this school year total. God-damn it.

In other news: John's speech was the best. I love him even more than before.

M had call-backs today. I'm sorta iffy about him getting a large part. I also have qualms about other people getting parts and not me, but I'll keep those to myself, as it will only get me into deep shit.

Not like I'm not in deep shit now.
Things to give up:
Internet
Junk-food of all kinds
Cell
allowance
Guys & Dolls (if worse comes to worse and I get in)
TV.

If I ran away, would you let me live with you? If I died, what would you do?

I need to stop this. I need to turn back time. Hermione, can I borrow your time turner? And your invisibility cloak, Harry, and give Past!ASGT answers to math exam?

I feel so melo-dramatic and depressed. Though I am both. I also feel very pathetic, and like someone no one will take this seriously with. I've told my parents numerous times, and they ignore it, as does the psychologist. I need to go see him again, see if I am depressed. I swear to god, I am.

Tell Me

Subject:	It's time for a C-Section
Time:	17 Jan 2005\|07:43pm
Mood:	anxious.

Phe, Kat and Pirate X slept over lastnight after Ubu. WHICH WAS KICK ASS! (both the play and the sleeping over and the cast party.) Everyone said Ubu was brilliante, and I'm so happy! Even though Ethan injured my nose, and my toe... He got me with my fan the first night in the nose, and the second night he fell on my foot. And I fucked up a bit on the second night, but it's okay.

I have pictures on my site, and to save you the trouble, that was a direct link. Enjoy!

I'm to lazy to say much more, but auditions for Guys N' Dolls are tomorrow, tell me to break a leg!

Carolyn, by the way, it doesn't matter what you sing. You'll kick ass.

1 dream

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Subject:	Here, take these, incase there's puppies.
Time:	13 Jan 2005\|09:42am
Mood:	annoyed.

WHAT THE FUCK!?!? My dad just felt the need to inform me, as I drove into school, ready to take my final exam that if I didn't get that good of grades on these he would, 'be reluctant to let you do another play at playhouse,' because of how it co-incides. Um... Should he be 'if you don't do that well, it's okay because you have two things going on at once' instead? JESUS FUCKING CHRIST!

I think without playhouse my life would be pointless and I would have to die. [/BB moment] But I'm serious. Even though Kat is. I completley love it there and I'm going to just die if I can't come back. I've always noticed that there, after someone has gotten lead actress, they haven't come back:
Rachel--Perils of Lulu--Came back about 1 1/2 year after.
Danielle--Prime Time Crime-- Never came back.
Kayla--Mouse that Roared--Never.
Allie--Pink Panther--No hide nor hair.
Marie--Clumsy Custard--Well, I've seen her, but she hasn't been to this session.
AM I NEXT?!?! I promised myself I would stop this strange circle, but oh my fucking God. Just kill me now.

Comment and make me feel better.

I have just decided to hack into the school's computer system (Peter) and change my grades so I got a bajillion percent on it all. Or just steal my test, and the answers and re-take it. Mwahahahahaha! Or burn the school. No one would know I did it. I'd wear gloves so no one could see my fingerprints, and I'd douse it with gasoline at midnight so no one would see me and walk through the walls to do it. Or maybe just do it inconspiculously during Study Hall. Who wants to help?

Tell Me

Subject:	"You're crushing my spleen!"
Time:	12 Jan 2005\|04:50pm
Mood:	amused.

I am nerdier than 25% of all people. Are you nerdier? Click here to find out!

Now, isn't that nice dear?

Costumes=FUN!
Ethan is wearing his stupid Swashbuck costume... again. Just to piss him off, during a dress rehersal instead of yelling 'UBU!' like I'm supposed to, I'll yell, 'SWASHBUCK!' instead. I get to wear Marley's (who's coming!) pretty purple grape dress with a white sheet over my head, (a story about that.) and a green dress that looks like my Alphasia dress, but isn't.

Now, the story about the sheet.
I love that sheet. I'm so glad I have it? Why? During Monologue Numero Uno, I have to come on being all ghostly, and of course, ACP is sitting in the FRONT ROW looking RIGHT AT ME. So I try not to laugh, but I really can't, so then, luckily, I get to wear the sheet. I love the sheet.

People Who Are Coming I Assume:
John West!
Kat
Pirate X
Linz
Gram
Familia

People Who Better Come Or Shall Perish:
Mia
Dillon
Fletcher
Other Mia
Blondie (I got you a name! I got you a name)
M
Anyone who wants to come. You all must come.

I had to call John today to give him his lovely info. But then both our other lines starting ringing simultaniously, so we had to go. He's fun to talk to on the phone. I love John.

I refuse to say anything about tassles.

Tell Me

Subject:	Because I'm such a conformist and all...
Time:	11 Jan 2005\|10:30am
Mood:	anxious.

Ask me 4 questions - any 4 no matter how personal, private, or random. I have to answer them honestly and I have to answer them all. In turn you post this message in your own journal and you have to answer the questions that are asked to you.

GOD DAMN IT! I HATE FINALS! This is my daily schedual:

7:20 Wake up.
7:45 Leave.
8:15 Begin my descent into hell.
11:00 Be picked up from hell
11:30 Try to take a nap
12:00 Procrastinate
2:00 Try to study
2:03 Procrastinate
4:45 Make food/Eat.
5:15 Leave
5:44 Kiss ACP. Hug Ethan/Phe/Riku/BB
5:45 Start rehersing
8:45 Leave
9:15 Get home
9:17 Study
12:00 Sleep.

Ubu in a few days! WE'RE GOING TO HELL!

Tell Me

Time:	08 Jan 2005\|11:33pm
Mood:	Verge of tears pissed need ACP.

I am currently hating one Katie Benson at the moment.

Comment. Make me feel better.

1 dream

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Subject:	"All you have is a gaping hole!"
Time:	08 Jan 2005\|07:04pm
Mood:	stressed.

I went to rehersal. Plucked my eyebrows (not at rehersal), helped set up chairs, hugged Marie. Saw Marie. Taped tape over George Bush. Kissed a someone Made out (heavily) with a certain person. Got up to 8 1/2 on snogging scale with a certain person. Watched Austin Powers with a certain person. Certain person told me he loved me, called me 'so beautiful' twice, and had the cutest line. As we were waiting for red light, certain person said, "If I didn't have to drive, I could just look at you all day." And as the light turned green and he was about to drive again he said, "one last look," looked at me, and began driving.

Clare's pissed about me not going to Board Jammers. She told Kell to tell me that she thinks I'm a loser. (Record: Clare and Rickey are the cutest couple. Riku said that about me and a certain person.)

Going to LPH tomorrow at 12:30 to help Phe, Ethan, Adam and Bonnie with the show. I get to do makeup! We're also doing costumes once the play is over. Yay!

I cannot study. I just can't focous. And I sort of don't know how to study. How do I do it? Inform me.

People who are on my list of people to come to Ubu
Pirate X
Linz
Mia
John
Sveggie
Kat
M
Clare
She can bring Rickey if she wants.

You know what sucks? A certain person can't go! Ergh. Phe's New Boy can't go either. XD.

1 dream

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Subject:	"I look like a tapestry. Just hang me on the wall... or somewhere else."
Time:	04 Jan 2005\|08:38pm

WHAT WOULD YOU DO IF:
» I died from natural causes:
» I said I liked you:
» I kissed you:
» I lived next door to you:
» I started smoking:
» I started cutting:
» I stole something:
» I was hospitalized:
» I ran away from home:
» I got into a fight and you weren't there:

WHAT DO YOU THINK ABOUT MY:
» Personality:
» Eyes:
» Face:
» Hair:
» Clothes:
» Mannerisms:
» Family:

WOULD YOU:
» Be my friend?:
» Lie to make me feel better?:
» Spread rumors about me?:
» Keep a secret if I told you one?:
» Loan me some cash?:
» Hold my hand?:
» Take a bullet for me?:
» Keep in touch?:
» Try and solve my problems?:
» Love me?:
» Date me?:

Fill it out and comment. Now.

(P.S. Alphasia is from The Clumsy Custard. So are all symptoms. Don't come crying to me if you don't feel them but are in lurve. It's your fault.)

1 dream

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Subject:	I am Suburbia, Goddess of Shopping!
Time:	04 Jan 2005\|06:41pm
Mood:	ecstatic.

New plethora of icons. But, more importantly...

UBU INFORMATION!</align>
We've moved! Where is the show? The Perpitch!
(6125 Olson Memorial Highway
Golden Valley, MN 55422)
Show Times
Saturday, January 15th at 7 O'Clock and
Sunday, January 16th at 4 O'Clock.

Tickets are about $5 at the door, flowers are lovely, and I will personally accept all cash donations. I would love to see each and every one of you there. Also, autographs are to be asked for after the show and, oh my god, I think we may have a backstage! WE HAVE A BACKSTAGE! *proceeds to dance*

(Note to self: Somehow get this information to John and Mia. And everyone else.)

Now, for finals. I have them next week everyday but Friday. In the morning. Except for Wednesday, which is only a possibilitie as we may not have to use that time for S/T. I get done with lunch aroudn 11:15, I think, so I get home around 12 O'Clock on a good day. That means, since rehersal is at 5:30 and I have to leave at 5, I have about 4 1/2 hours to study every night! God, I love this.

1 dream

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Subject:	I'm Chevy Chase, and you're touching yourself.
Time:	27 Dec 2004\|04:56pm
Mood:	fangirly.

Oh, my, god! Guess who I met yesterday? Just guess!

TOM ING CRUISE! Yeah, we talked. He asked us if we had a merry Christmas (we did) we asked him back, (he did.) And how he was. (He was good.) And I, myself, told him to have a happy New Year. He told us to have one too! He's ing hot. And short. But ing hot.

AIM express isn't working, nor is AG. I'm ed off. HOW CAN I TALK TO MY BELOVED BOYFRIEND IF I DON'T HAVE HIS NORMAL PHONE NUMBER, AND AIM EXPRESS ISN'T WORKING! URGH! I'm gonna go try el otra computadora.

Later, shall stop at Yard Sale and Femme to see what kinkalicious items they have. And, of course, call Dave.

Also have to read Odyssey. Damnit all.

4 dreams

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Subject:	"One of the first things you said on the phone was, 'so, what's your opinion about underwear?'."
Time:	26 Dec 2004\|06:37am
Mood:	<--supposed to be restless. No.

Just some quick hilights: Getting my picture back from Bobbie. Framed.
NEW COMPUTER!
all 3 LOTR extended editions.
NEW COMPUTER!
NEW COMPUTER!

Yep. Oh, and last night, after we watched the first half of Fellowship, I called Dave. We talked for oh... 2 hours and 1 minutes. That's right. We talked till about midnight. About all sorts of fun things. Underwear, how this thing isn't a vibrator, how I have a shirt on, S&M, Harry Potter brooms, type casting, how porn is the largest industry, how it's often considered perverted for a Junior to date a Freshmen like moi, the many uses of wipped cream, etc. (That's what we talk about, Linz! That's the type of man I'm dating! Haha!)

Damn. Must be off to Telluride, but Di's gonna be there. I'm gonna call Dave EVERY day on Daddoo's cellphone. I hate traveling. I get home at about 6:10 on Saturday, and I'll be home at 7:30 so me and Dave can't do much. We'll talk. Then I have rehersal the next day. Remember: Wear shirt Carolyn hearts.

Next time you'll hear from me, I will A) be on a computer that doesn't have fun with random keys being pressed and screwing me up and B) in Telluride! Lurve!

(Gimme a ring-a-ding-ding! 970.369.1313.)

Comment and make my dismally travely day all happy and bright! Lalala! (Not like talking to Dave didn't do it. God. Am I feeling exactly what I described as Alphasia in Clumsy Custard? Are you thinking what I think you're saying? Are you thinking what I think you think I'm saying? Am I losing my mind? Am I quoting Dave and my lines from Ubu? Tell me what the hell is going on, Clare, Linz. I trust you. Carolyn too.)

07.16.05-- Can you stand the wait?

3 dreams

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Subject:	"But then someone could be thinking, 'wow, what an ugly coat,' and you hear them, and turn around an
Time:	25 Dec 2004\|10:09am
Mood:	busy.

I GOT COMPUTER!

Dear Santa,

I have been a good girl.

It really wasn't my fault what happened at Katie's Christmas party. It was Michael who spiked the punch with too much Rum. I can't help it if I drank 42 glasses. It was so good---smelled and tasted just like vanilla.

I thought it was funny when I put Dave's thong on my head and danced the Time Warp on the Fouton while singing `Sweet Transvestite'. I didn't mean to break Katie's Computer and don't know why Katie would sue me for murder.

I don't remember calling Ethan's wife a Fat Monkey---even though she looked like one with magenta eye shadow and black lipstick!

And when I threw up on Pheobe's husband's finger, it was only because I ate too much of that Oreos.

After all that fun, I admit I was a little tired. So I fell asleep on my way home and drove my Flying motorcycle through my neighbor's closet. I don't think that was any reason for my neighbor to call me a furry hippo and have me arrested for murder!

So, Santa...here I sit in my jail cell on Christmas Eve, all funky and groovy. And I'm really not to blame for any of this stupid stuff. Please bring me what I want the most---bail money!

Sincerely and ugily yours,
Shea (Really a nice girl!)

P.S. It's only 42 bucks!
Write one!

6 dreams

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